Rainbow and the Nash

by Paddle Steamer

Rating: everyone
Tags: Human, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Rainbow Dash, Comedy
Length: 1025

Rainbow Dash was just flying to Ponyville one day when she got caught up in a race she wouldn't have thought possible.

It was a calm, clear summer day and Rainbow Dash was enjoying herself. Doing flips and rolls as she made her way to Ponyville when she notices she's being followed. What could this pursuer be? What can it want? Will Dash be able to outpace it? Read to find out! (Duh)

Warning; physics defying Rambler ahead, it's fuelled by pure Pinkie Pie. :pinkiecrazy:

I do not own My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic or Beep! Beep! by the Playmates, nor do I own the 1951 Nash Rambler convertible. I only own this humble story.

Published 2013-09-22 19:40:01 UTC
Last updated 2013-09-22 19:40:01 UTC

How can it keep up!?

The day was clear and Celestia's sun burned brightly in the summer sky, I smiled and shot up into the sky, my wings pumping hard, I turned sharply and did three loops, a barrel role and finished with a twirl. "Oh yeah Rainbow, you still got it." I said to myself with a confident smile.

White Tail Woods was a really neat place, while I wouldn't admit it to my friends I found it fairly calming to just slow down and enjoy the sights. I wouldn't be needed in Ponyville today for another four hours and had plenty of time to kill just lazing about in peace. I glided next to some swallows as they cheerily flew through the sky, they'd never be as cool as me of course but the little birds were quite agile, even if they couldn't keep up with me.

I flew back down to the road listening to the sounds of the birds chirping and the woodland animals going about their day. I did a few quick laps around the field surrounding the road, watching the flowers bend to the air gust my wings kicked up before I turned back to the road and began heading back to Ponyville at a leisurely pace.

I heard stones being kicked around and the sounds of twigs breaking behind me, I turned my head to see, and what to my surprise; a little pale yellow Nash Rambler was following me, about eight times my size.

The guy must have wanted to pass me out, as he kept on tooting his horn. Beep! Beep!

The guy flashed his headlights twice with the horn to signal me to move out the way, there was no way I was letting this guy pass me.

I'll show him that Rainbow is not a Pegasus to scorn. Beep, beep. Beep! Beep! Beep, beep. Beep! Beep! His horn went beep, beep, beep. Beep! Beep!

The driver kept flashing his headlights for me to move and increased his speed with me, what was his problem anyway? It's not like he can outpace the fastest flyer in Equestria! I flew faster, no way was this human passing me.

I pumped my wings as fast as I could, to give the guy the shake. But the little Nash Rambler stayed right behind, he still had on his brake!

The dust behind the car was blotting out the forest behind it; it bounced around with all the little lumps in the road as its suspension tried to deal with the unusual speed. His headlights and horn kept flashing insistently.

He must have thought his car had more guts, as he kept on tooting his horn! Beep! Beep!

I'll show him that Rainbow is not a Pegasus to scorn. Beep, beep. Beep! Beep! Beep, beep. Beep! Beep! His horn went beep, beep, beep. Beep! Beep!

I continued to pick up speed, but so did the Nash, more so than it had any right to.

I hit my stride, and I took off with gust! Soon we were doing six hundred and ninety, must've left him in the dust.

I thought with confidence and arrogant pride, but it was soon replaced with a slack jaw and wide eyes.

When I peeked behind me I couldn't believe my eyes; the little Nash Rambler was right behind, I think that guy could fly!

The trees started to bow as the two of us blew by in a blur of speed, no, there was no way I was letting this guy beat me! I was the fastest flyer in Equestria, there was no way a cheap machine was going to one up me in a race; it wasn't possible! Onlookers would've seen nothing but a colourful blur and a truly massive dust cloud as we passed through Ponyville and continued on. Ponies being blown off their hooves as we passed them by, whoops; I'll apologise to them...someday.

Beep, beep. Beep! Beep! Beep, beep. Beep! Beep! His horn went beep, beep, beep!

The Rambler kept flashing his lights even as we were ripping plants out of the ground and bowing trees nearly to their breaking point. I still refused to believe this tinker toy could beat me; I wouldn't let it beat me!

Now we're doing seven hundred and ten, this certainly was a race! For a Rambler to pass Rainbow Dash, would be a big disgrace!

My mane was plastered against my face, flying this fast without goggles was making my eyes tear and I had to squint to keep dust out. The Nash's horn kept on nipping at my rear like some Tartarus spawned demon; its engine screaming at me with a monstrous roar. Beads of sweat threatened to blur my vision as I pushed myself as hard as I could.

The guy must've wanted to pass me out, as he kept on tooting his horn!

The Rambler went over a particularly large lump and became airborne before landing back down the ground with a small bounce; its trajectory was nearly flat from speed. The driver continued to flash his lights at me, why wouldn't he leave me alone!?

I'll show him that Rainbow is not a Pegasus to scorn! Beep, beep. Beep! Beep! Beep, beep. Beep! Beep! His horn went beep, beep, beep!

Now we're doing seven hundred twenty, as fast as I could go. The Rambler pulled alongside of me as if I were going slow.

My eyes grew wide and my jaw slacked, it wasn't possible!!

The fellow rolled down his window, and yelled for me to hear.

The guy was about mid-forties, he had light brown hair and blue eyes, which seemed to bore into my soul. My jaw had practically unhinged and fell off at what he said next.

"HEY FILLY, HOW CAN I GET THIS CAR OUT OF SECOND GEAR!?"

Author's Note

I really don't know, the things that pop into my head randomly...I think the term is "my head is full of fuck." :rainbowwild:

I made this on a whim, but you know what? It's more coherent than my TCB fic. :rainbowlaugh: