House Music

I suddenly felt a wave of pleasure as the wonderful woman below me gave my dick a tentative lick, all the way up to the head. I could see her glorious tits bouncing under my cock as she soon took it in her mouth, bobbing her head along the shaft. I was getting closer as she went faster and faster, her hot moans only serving to bring me to the edge. I was just about to finish and blow my hot load down her throat, when my mother came in, tied me to the wall, put a funnel in my mouth, and force fed me nothing but sour krout until i was 26 and a half years old. That’s when I swore that someday, someday I’d get out of that basement and move to a magical far away place, where the sun is always shining and

-Wait, what the hell? Where’s that chick? How the?-

I slowly wake up, confused, tired, and with a strong hard-on. I realized my ipod was playing the infamous “Albuqurque” by Weird Al. I check the previous song, and it was nothing other than “I Just Had Sex” by Lonely Island. Jesus Christ I have a weird taste in music. I pause my ipod and get up to get some snackage, because apparently that’s what you do after you wake up from a wet dream at 2 o’clock in the morning.

I slowly shuffle my feet to the kitchen, and open one of the cabinets. Observing it’s contents, I reach for the nutella and head to the silverware. I grab a butter knife and set the two down and grab the bread on the refrigerator. Why we keep the bread there still bugs me. Getting a slice of honey wheat bread, I scoop the nutella out of the jar and start drowning the poor thing in delicious chocolate-flavored peanut butter. After the sweet damage has been done, I put up the nutella and toss the knife in the sink, setting a self-reminder to put it in the dishwasher later. And you guessed it, as soon as I’m about to enjoy one of life's many miracles, a sudden BOOM shakes the floor, making me drop my treat on the floor, nutella side down. Great, so that theory works for nutella too. Well fuck me. Oddly enough, the second thing that irritated me was the explosion that caused my downfall in the first place. Seeming to come from the backyard, I look around for a weapon I could use. I grab my Wilson tennis racket, ready to beat the living crap out of something, if it was necessary. I slowly creep up to the back door, holding the door knob and ready to kick ass. That’s what I’m telling myself at least. I quickly open the door, and what my eyes see through the screen door was completely....completely.... well let me tell you, and you can judge me on this.

There was a fuckin portal that I barely saw before it shrank and disappeared. What it left behind was even crazier. Right there in front of the back porch was a hot and completely butt naked chick standing in the grass. Her hair was kinda neon blue and spiky. Wrapped around her neck were from what i could tell dr.dre beats. She must be some dj or something. Then I think about it. Blue spiky hair, glasses, dj....what could that mean.......wait, could she be?....

I was just about to guess myself wrong, when i see it. There’s a horn on her head. My mouth hangs open as i realize the holy truth. Standing nude in my backyard, was the ever famous vinyl scratch. In human form no less. I drop my tennis racket, opening the screen door and contemplating what i’m gonna say. I should probably ask her if she’s alright, and not sounding like a creep, invite her inside the house for warmth and shelter. Considering she’s naked, she might be cold. Well, here goes nothing. Don’t fuck this up man.

"Um, hey! Blue haired chick!"

Way to make an introduction.

She turns to me, suddenly realizing I was there in the first place. Now I could fully see her face and, well, boobs. I tried to be not as perverted as possible, but I couldn't help looking at her big, perky breasts. My eyes moving downwards, I discover her nether regions. Great, just when my boner was about to go down. Considering I'm in my briefs, it was also clearly obvious to anybody who happened to be in my backyard. And what do you know, theres a really hot girl there.

She finally responds after I call out.

"Ugh, where am I?" She asks, putting a hand to her head. Startled by having hands rather than hooves, she looks herself down, noticing her breasts, her slim body, and turning her head around, finding her ass. Ironically enough, there was her signature cutie mark on both her butt cheeks. Ok, anymore of this and my dick is gonna put a hole in my briefs. “The heck?”

"Um, hi! Ah, would you like to come in?"

What she says after that did nothing but make my erection grow to it's extent.

"Yeah, might as well. Not like I have another choice."

I open the door further to let her in, and as she carefully approaches, I assume she's at least a C cup. Not too big, not too small. She enters the house, and I start sweating bullets as I close the door and try to make a decent conversation. I mean come on, it's not like I can score with her....wait, why are these the first things to come to mind? Sigh, well that's what I get from having a sexual dream, then meeting a naked humanized DJ from Equestria.

"So, what exactly brings you here?" I ask nervously, rushing to the front door to lock it.

She was about to say something, but hesitated. "Wait, hold on, how about you tell me what the heck I am?" She gestured to her body to emphasize her point.

I turn around. "Um, you're human. We all are here." I say as I go to close the blinds on the windows.

"...Holy Celestia." She facepalmed. "So Lyra was right all along."

"Yes- I mean who?"

"Never mind. So, you really want to know? You might not believe me."

"I could care less. Besides, I can't believe the portal and all that stuff, I'm sure you could make some sense."

She seemed to take that into thought. "You saw the portal?"

"Yeah." I sit down on the chair in the living room. She was already placed on the couch, I guessed she wasn't that used yet to walking on two feet.

"Sigh....well, it started back in my own world.... erm, Equestria."

This is gonna be good.