The Club

Twilight approached the house addressed on Pinkie's invitation. It was rather large, and Twilight couldn't remember ever having been inside of it before or place an owner to the property. It didn't seem like Pinkie could afford it, or would need a home away from Sugar Cube Corner. Twilight could only assume it was being rented for the party specifically, or that the Club provided the property for hosting parties. She realized that she had become lost in thought and promptly stepped up to the door and knocked.

Of course I'm here early, Twilight thought as Pinkie (who was dressed in a frilly pink party dress and comical harlequin mask) let her in and she saw that only a few ponies besides Pinkie, Rarity and herself had arrived and were only engaged in small talk. Pinkie bounced away to get Twilight a drink and Rarity approached. Twilight hadn't known what Rarity would wear, and was enamored with her appearance. The little black dress would have been revealing if it weren't for the fact that going unclothed were the norm, and the gold and silver sun-and-moon mask – which resembled an amalgamation of the masks of Thalia and Melpomene, in addition to its reference to celestial bodies – was a stunning example of overstatement done right.

“Darling, most of the others will be arriving fashionably late, it seems. In fact, I was count-” Rarity's jaw dropped as she gaped at Twilight's bare shoulders and back, transfixed and horrified by the sight of her lavender wings. “What – but your cape?”

“It, er, tore. I couldn't wear it, so –”

Rarity threw herself over Twilight's side, hiding Twilight's wings with her own body. She was also making it difficult for Twilight to continue standing.

“Rarity,” Twilight groaned, “Is this really necessary?”

“Yes,” Rarity hissed in Twilight's ear, “and it's Elusive for the evening, remember. You must use pseudonyms tonight and –” Rarity looked nervously around the room and Twilight followed her eyes. Everypony there was staring at them. “Oh, dear. Whether or not they saw your wings, we've certainly got their attention now. Stay between me and the wall, I asked Berry to provide us with a private room, we're going there right now.”

Rarity awkwardly positioned Twilight behind her and the two of them quickly made their way around the room and down a hallway. As they slipped into a smallish room with a table and five seats, Rarity scowled at Twilight.

“What? It was an accident, it happened while I was getting ready to come here. I didn't have time to get a replacement!”

“Would it have still covered your wings?”

“I highly doubt it.”

Rarity's expression softened. “I suppose it can't be helped. Give it to me and I'll see what I can do before we have to return to the party.”

“I didn't bring it.”

Rarity's face twitched. “Excuse me,” she managed in an unusually high pitch. Then, she rushed from the room and Twilight heard her run upstairs. For a few minutes, Twilight listened to the sounds of Rarity dashing to and fro upstairs and more guests arriving – or more accurately, the sound of Pinkie enthusiastically greeting the newcomers. With each addition to the crowd assembling in the house, the sounds of Rarity's unseen task seemed to grow more frantic. At length, she returned with a white cape, looking haggard and anxious.

“I had to cannibalize the lining of the curtain on the four-poster upstairs. The fabric is nothing special – it won't catch the light as you move the way your silk cape would have. However, we make do and persevere. We must.”

As Rarity threw the cape over Twilight's shoulders and fastened a clasp in front of her neck, Twilight asked: “Why is it so important that nopony here know me? None of them can expose me –”

“Wrong. They can; they will simply risk exposure of their own. Keep in mind that you have more to lose than these ponies, and that anyone who has the same – or nearly the same – stake in their anonymity as you will not want to expose you. They will want to use you, and if you don't know who they are it will be difficult to stop them.”

Twilight was stunned. “What do you mean? Am I already in trouble? Should I just leave?”

“No! We mustn't consider retreat now, not now…” Rarity trailed off for a moment as she considered something. “I have invited three powerful ponies from the Canterlot chapter of the Club to attend this evening, specifically so I could introduce them to Evening Star. For them to come all the way to Ponyville, and to do so clandestinely no less, only for a – a no-show!”

Rarity seemed on the verge of panic again, until she closed her eyes, put her hoof over her chest and inhaled deeply. After a moment, she exhaled slowly as she brought her hoof away from her chest and re-opened her eyes. A quick and simple trick for calming nerves that Twilight knew well.

Rarity looked intensely at Twilight. “It's simply out of the question.”

“But, why do they want to meet me?”

“I promised them that Evening Star is a powerful pony worth knowing, and it's true. They just don't need to know that you are who you are.”

“Well, who are they?”

“I can't give you their real identities, Club rules. It would be rude of you to ask them without first giving yours, which you must not do. Mind, they may give theirs in the hopes that you will return the favor. It would be rude of you not to, but you won't if it comes to it. Better to be rude than foalish; their tactical mistake is your advantage.”

“You make it sound like these are enemies, not friends.”

“They are makers and breakers, Eve.” Rarity declared in a matter-of-fact tone. “Neither friend nor foe; they have the power to help you excel and achieve great things, or they can stymie you at each turn. Within the Club, they are known as Bell Weather, Polly Tessa and Agit Prop. That last pseudonym has a silent 't' and 'p' on the end of the first and last name, respectively.”

“What makes them so powerful? What could they possibly do to me outside of exposing me?”

“I can tell you that Bell Weather is the epitome of a trendsetter; the Canterlot elite clamor to emulate her on a regular basis. This effectively transforms Weather's idle whims and superfluous choices of simple things such as where to stop for a light lunch or which watchmaker she fancies into the kind of fads that determine which businesses thrive or whither. She uses her position to purposefully ruin some ponies, while discreetly favoring others.”

Twilight thought she detected a hint of bitterness, and wondered whether or not this Bell Weather had ever cost her friend business.

“Polly Tessa is a Canterlot politician, she sits in her stiff, high-backed seat at court day-in and day-out; arguing, flattering, bloviating… It's a wonder she hasn't talked herself to death. In any case, she's been playing that game a long time, and she's learned to make use of every opportunity to rub shoulders with giants, and then step on those shoulders to lift herself up. She's ruthless, calculating, frighteningly charismatic – at least frightening to those who know what she's really like. Simply put, she influences decisions with lasting effects for all of Equestria, and she does everything in her power to keep and expand her power.”

“How can such a pony have any sway under Princess Celestia? Surely, it isn't in the nations best interests!”

“It's never clear how such wretched ponies come to power. Perhaps they start out working in earnest and the need to do things improperly from time to time corrupts them. Else, they may hide their impropriety behind seemingly charitable actions that benefit them indirectly. I cannot say.

“I can, however, tell you a little about our third guest, Agit Prop. He is an artist in name, and an advertiser in practice. He creates propaganda disguised as art and entertainment in order to subtly alter the political atmosphere of Equestria. In other words, he provides the sugar with which the populace swallows the lies and deceit of his 'friends' and employers.”

“That's – it's awful! Why would I ever want to associate with these ponies? Why do you?”

“I do it because I caught their attention. I made a name for myself in Canterlot once, but my business did not take off as it might have, in spite of the influence of a powerful friend I made. You see, the three ponies I've just described to you are known in Club circles as the 'Club Elite.' They learned that I was a member of the Club, and let me know in no uncertain terms that they didn't like what I had to offer. I'm still not sure why. However, I learned who they were and eventually we came to an… understanding.”

Twilight was less sure of what to think than ever. Has Rarity been performing some unsavory favors for these Club Elite in exchange for opportunities to improve her business? Or even to save her boutique from going under? Why is she introducing me to them?!

Rarity looked Twilight in the eye and Twilight thought she saw a ferocious passion. Predatory, but not in the same way as she had looked at Twilight in private before.

“Here's where things change, though. We have a real opportunity to put a stop to some of their scheming. I'm on even ground with them, so they and I can't harm or hinder each other much, nor do they or I have any real incentive to help one another. You on the other hand, are in a position to make promises and threats anonymously–”

“Threats? Are you asking me to take part in some kind of cloak and dagger conspiracy?”

“In a manner of speaking. Nothing dangerous, I assure you. The point is, you can make promises during Club events and carry them out while acting as Princess. Ideally, without it being obvious that it was you. They don't know how to hurt you; I act as a buffer, informing you about them and keeping you safely anonymous.”

“However, you can't explicitly tell me who they are, otherwise they have grounds for having you kicked out of the Club and exposing you in the process?”

“Right. Telling you just enough to harm their interests is pushing the bounds of what we can get away with, but they won't move against me as long as the threat of you retaliating keeps them at bay. Besides, we can make use of their connections to help ourselves. My business can grow and you can push for reform in court that will actually help Equestrian citizens.”

“This seems like an awfully big risk. Also, why are we taking part in Canterlonian political conspiracies in the middle of a sex club orgy!?”

“Because the Club provides an excellent cover, combined with opportunities for fun. On that note, I anticipate that our guests of 'honor' will be late. Shall we partake of Berry's whimsically perverted merrymaking in the meantime?”

Twilight was exasperated with Rarity. “How can you suggest that? You've just told me that the whole reason for involving me in all this was to help you with some underhooved political scheme involving three of the most atrocious ponies I've ever heard of. If I do or say the wrong, thing they could potentially harm me or our friends to try and muscle me into helping them! Not to mention you!”

“Darling, you mustn't worry about me. I-”

“I'm not worried about what they'll do to you; you already deal with them, apparently. I mean you manipulated me into coming here, and I-I…” Twilight took a moment to regain her composure. “I thought you had some sort of – I don't know – romantic feelings for me. I have no idea what, if anything, you actually want from me other than help with those Club Elite.”

Rarity looked hurt for a moment, before casting her eyes down to her hooves. “I suppose I haven't been a very good friend to you. I admit I intentionally left you in the dark concerning my plans; I'm sorry I wasn't more straightforward.” Rarity looked up and met Twilight's gaze with determination. “However, you must eventually learn to play politics if you are to take your position as Princess and shape the future of Equestria. As for my personal interest in you... How can I put this delicately?”

Rarity stepped forward and placed a hoof on Twilight's chest.

“You are one of my closest, dearest friends. I had hoped that you would let me pleasure you and receive pleasure from you in turn, but I am not trying to pursue a romantic relationship with you. The truth is, I have not been in a sexually intimate relationship in some time, and as far as I can tell you never have. It may seem unorthodox, but I wanted us to be intimate while remaining friends, and perhaps agree to be exclusive with one another until one or both of us finds a very special somepony.”

Twilight felt hot, and her face flushed. There it was: Rarity wanted Twilight, but not as lovers, or rather, as lovers in a strictly carnal sense.

“I don't know how I feel about that. I can't deny I'm attracted to you, or that what we did before…” Twilight broke eye contact for a moment before resolving to continue. “I certainly enjoyed that, but I'm not sure if this is what I want. I always assumed that I'd find somepony to fall in love with. Somepony whom I would just know I wanted to, er, give myself to. That must sound very naïve.”

“Not at all, it's very romantic, albeit a bit idealistic. Then again, who doesn't fantasize when it comes to love? All I'm asking is that you give this a chance. Perhaps you'll have an easier time deciding once we've relaxed a bit. We can enjoy the festivities or just stay in here for the time being…”

Rarity let her words hang in the air as Twilight considered what she wanted. Her curiosity eventually got the best of her.

“Well, I may as well see what a Club party is like,” she said sheepishly.

“That's the spirit, darling!” Rarity encouraged as she led Twilight back to the front of the house. “Bear in mind that Berry's house rules lean towards exhibitionism, group sex, sex games and general silliness. Simply put, everypony will effectively be on display for each others benefit. When I host an event, it is generally more reserved: couples and small groups excuse themselves to private rooms while the majority of guests mingle in the common area, discussing anything and everything that may or may not be considered 'polite conversation' outside of Club functions. Other hosts will certainly have their own distinct tendencies.”

“So, I shouldn't consider Pink – I mean, Berry's party as representative of Club parties as a whole.”

“Some Club functions really aren't even parties at all.”

At this point the two mares emerged from the back hall and found the ponies in attendance gathered around a makeshift stage on the hearth. They were all watching as a powder blue pony wearing a tuxedo top, fishnet leggings on her hind legs, a top hat and a domino mask stepped up on the stage.

“It can't be…” Twilight muttered as she strained her neck to try and see the mare's barely obscured Cutie Mark.

“Gather 'round merrymakers! The Blue and Sensual Trisha shall dazzle you with feats of risqué magic and sultry sensationalism!”

“It is,” Rarity stated in a matter-of-fact tone.

“To begin, I shall need a volunteer. You!” the showmare shouted as she thrust one of her hooves toward a stallion near the front. “Come and bask in the glory of the stage!”

The burgundy stallion climbed up and smiled bashfully at the crowd.

“Now, behold as I tame his treacherous snake without the use of hooves or magic!” 'Trisha' promptly dove under her new assistant and placed her lips against the sheath of his dormant cock, kissing and licking with shameless enthusiasm. After a moment, his dick began to harden and she settled into a rhythm, rocking back and forth on her haunches as she noisily sucked and swallowed on his growing flesh. This continued for nearly a minute before she brought her lips down to the base of the engorged stallionhood, making lusty noises as she deep-throated him. Finally she pulled away quickly, making a satisfying popping noise with her lips as the flared head left her mouth.

“Ta-da!” she exclaimed breathily breaking a thin trail of saliva hanging from her lips and his cock. “The beast is now under The Blue and Sensual Trisha's spell, giving her its rapt, undivided attention! For her next trick, Trisha shall make this monster disappear!”

Twilight watched as Trixie got the stallion to lay on his back and promptly straddled him. Once they were both in position she turned out to the audience and gave a disclaimer: “This next bit isn't for the faint of heart; Trisha may begin speaking in tongues.” Without further delay, she sank onto him in one fluid motion. Upon being fully engulfed her volunteer began to buck wildly – eliciting loud, throaty moans from Trixie.

“Having fun, Evey?”

Twilight was transfixed by the brazen display of passionate sex punctuated by gasps, moans, and cat-calls.

“Eve? Evening Star? Hello~?”

A pink hoof waved in front of her face, demanding her attention.

“Huh? Oh, Berry!”

“Enjoying the show?”

“Er, yes. I didn't know Trix-”

“Sh!”

“Oh, right, um, what was her Club name again?”

“You almost had it. You just needed a 'sh' instead of an 'ecks' – Trisha!”

“I didn't know Trisha did… this sort of thing,” Twilight said as she gestured to the stage.

“Yep! She's very popular at these parties. I bet her magic show would be more fun if she treated her volunteers this nice instead of trying to show them up.”

“I'm not certain being this nice in public would go over well,” Rarity interjected. “Besides, I had hoped you would have prepared more interactive entertainment for this evening.”

“OH BOY! You never wanna do fun stuff with everypony else, Elusive! Don't you worry, I'll start up some games right away!” With that, Pinkie rushed off to get the other ponies.

“I may have just made a small mistake.”

“Why?” Twilight asked. “I thought you wanted us to join the others.”

“I had intended for you to observe, as I typically do, rather than immediately jump in.”

“I admit I'm a bit anxious, but what's the worst that could happen?”

“Fair enough, as long as she doesn't expect us to play-”

“TIME FOR TWISTER!” Pinkie exclaimed for the whole neighborhood to hear.

“This is bad.”

“My cape!” Twilight nearly choked on the words, thinking of what would happen if her cape were twisted or torn off in the middle of the crowd. Purple alicorns are not inconspicuous.

“Don't fret, we'll just tell Berry that we prefer to sit out-”

“C'mon, we're starting!” Pinkie shouted as she pulled her friends into the middle of a small crowd gathered around a colourfully dotted mat. She spun a wheel and proclaimed that “Right forehoof on yellow!” was the first move.

Amidst the sudden movement of the party-goers, Twilight was helpless to remove herself from the throng of ponies. Once the movement stopped, she found she had managed to actually step on a yellow circle. Realizing she should probably quit while she was ahead, she turned to Rarity and asked, “Can't we just stop playing and-?”

“Left backhoof – red!”

“Unfortunately, I think not,” Rarity replied as the group began to twist around itself again. “I don't see how we could possibly get away before the crowd thins. Keep in mind, if you lose or quit Berry will have you spin the 'penalty' wheel.”

“Penalty?”

“Sexual favors for the winner, spanking, that sort of thing.”

“Tail – green!”

“Great,” Twilight grumbled as she half knelt and stretched her tail to one side. “I'm so looking forward to tha-WOAH! A~h!”

Between maintaining her unusual stance and doing her best to keep her cape in place with magic, Twilight was already straining. She wasn't able to respond in time, as she felt another pony nosing under the hem of her dress. The sensation of this unknown mare's tongue lazily making its way up the back of her thigh didn't help.

“O~h, Celestia, that's – that's not what I need right now.”

“Someone's getting fresh with you?”

“Her tongue is inching its way across my backside.”

“She's probably off-balance.”

“Right forehoof – red!”

Just as Pinkie called out the new move, Twilight bumped the mare behind her with her hip, sending two ponies to the floor. She caught herself before toppling over as well and found a red circle to plant her hoof on.

“Grape Shot and The Pink Avenger are out of the game!” Pinkie announced. “They must take their place beside the Wheel of Really Fun Punishments!”

“That doesn't sound very ominous,” Twilight observed. “I suppose most ponies don't mind spinning it, do they?”

“No, not generally,” Rarity conceded, “but some of the punishments aren't fun at all. Berry probably explained the house rules while we were sorting out your cape, and that's when she would have told us which punishments are on the wheel this evening.”

“Muzzle – blue!”

“This is going to make finding dots difficult.”

Rarity was absolutely right, with their noses to the floor several ponies weren't quick enough to stay in the game over the next few turns, Rarity herself included. Twilight eventually found herself with her forehooves crossed, one backhoof under her belly, the other stretched out behind her and her tail wrapped around her flank to touch a dot out to her side. On the plus side, it seemed like there weren't many ponies left in the game, since she hadn't been covertly licked or tickled for two turns in a row.

“Muzzle – yellow!”

Twilight lifted her face and looked for an unoccupied dot, she found one that would force her stretch just a little more… and she fell on top of the only other pony still playing.

“That's it!” Pinkie exclaimed. “Evening Star and The Blue and Sensual Trisha are the winners!”

“Huh, I thought you were on stage.” Twilight panted, relieved to finally relax her limbs.

“Cherry-Berry Crumble insisted that I join, interrupting my show just before the explosive climax,” Trixie grumbled, “and I'm not talking about fireworks.”

“C'mon, girls, the others are gonna spin the wheel!” Pinkie giddily reminded them. “Depending on what they get, you get to pick their Funishments!”

Twilight allowed Trixie to claim all of the ponies who were compelled to please the winner, and dutifully spanked a couple of them as well, albeit not hard. After a few minutes, Rarity stepped up.

“Yay! Elusive's turn!” Pinkie declared as she hopped up and down. “You haven't spun the wheel or even played a game since the last Hearts and Hooves when you got the Ponyata Punishment!”

Twilight could see Rarity visibly shudder. “Yes, well,” she remarked, “I found the, ah, buck harness uncomfortable.” Rarity gripped a rung on the wheel with her magic and forcefully spun it. As it clicked away everyone watched intently, waiting for it to slow to a stop. It finally began to crawl, and seemed to be stopping as the arrow pressed against the rung separating 'Winner's Choice!' from '¡Ponyata!' Rarity closed her eyes and tensed up. The wheel came to a halt.

“Winner's Choice!” Pinkie declared.

“Thank Celestia,” Rarity murmured.

“I'll be taking this one,” Twilight said as she stepped past Trixie.

“What's her funishment gonna be, Evey?” Pinkie asked.

“She'll find out later, after we leave the party.”

Rarity met Twilight's gaze and licked her lips. “Looking forward to it.”

“What a romantic exchange,” a gray-coated unicorn said flatly. He had a short, wavy, maroon mane and wore a navy blue pea-coat and black masquerade mask.

“Oh? But you sound so bored,” replied a thick-set, mauve mare with white, well-kept hair that nearly covered an unusually stubby horn. She wore a pale purple dress and white opera mask.

“Agit is al~ways bored. Elu~sive, my dear, how a~re you?” asked another mare, with a sky-blue coat and golden locks the colour of sunshine. Her pale green summer dress had an open back to allow her wings to move freely. She wore no mask.

“Oh, Bell, I've never been better. I must say, you look radiant as ever. Fearless too, considering…” Rarity gestured around them as she trailed off.

“Haha~haha, are you kidding?” Bell Weather asked obnoxiously. “I lo~ve the attention; I'd have come a~ll the way here without my mask, except the idea seems to make my friends nervous. I simply forgot the silly thing in the coach from the train station.”

“Well,” Polly Tessa interjected, “let it never be said that you aren't a shining example of the value of indiscretion.”

“Let's not dwindle on small talk,” Agit Prop said impatiently.

“I think you mean 'dawdle',” Twilight corrected.

“I take liberties with words.”

“I'm…” Twilight struggled to form a response. “That's not an excuse for using the wrong word.”

“I didn't use the wrong word,” he said with a perfectly straight face. “I only use the words I mean to use, sometimes I just use words to mean something other than they normally do.”

Twilight began to argue her point again when Polly Tessa cut her off. “Artistic liberties are, of course, to be expected of an accomplished lyricist. I am of the opinion that Agit's visionary use of words contributes to the enrichment of our language.”

Twilight could only gape until Rarity caught her eye and silently indicated to just let it go. Pinkie Pie bounded up to the group, and Twilight was relieved at the brief reprieve from having to talk to ponies that neither understood nor cared to understand the words they use.

“Hello~!” Pinkie sang to the newcomers, “I'm sorry I didn't greet you when you came in, I was handing out funishments. I've just finished now, and it's so super great you three could make it! Are you ready to have some fun?”

“Haha~haha! I-I wouldn't exactly call, er, this–” Bell chided as she gestured at the guests, “my sort of crowd. Thanks for the laugh, though.”

“Anytime!” Pinkie said in a forced cheerful tone. “I just love to make ponies laugh.”

Polly stepped towards Rarity, completely ignoring Pinkie. “Let's cut right to the heart of the matter. Elusive, you've invited us here to meet and greet with someone important. Isn't it about time for proper introductions?”

“Yes, of course.” Rarity answered. “Please, follow me to a room where we can speak privately.”

Twilight and the Club Elite began to follow Rarity in the direction of the back hall. Pinkie subtly placed her hoof against Twilight's back leg, causing her to pause and look back at Pinkie. As the Club Elite passed in front of Twilight, Pinkie sidled up beside her and whispered in her ear.

“They aren't nice at all. Bell is a bully, Agit thinks he's better than everypony else, and Polly will pretend to be your friend. I thought that she was my friend for over a month; then, after she figured out everything about Elusive that she could from me, I didn't hear from her again until after I found out what they'd done to her business.”

Twilight started to ask about Rarity's business in Canterlot, but Pinkie cut her off with a quick “zip it” gesture. Pinkie then turned back to the party and loudly continued her host duties, leaving Twilight to follow the others into the back room.

Twilight was seated beside Rarity, near the door. Agit Prop was to Twilight's right, Bell Wheather to Rarity's left, and Polly Tessa between them. Agit had a strange expression as though he were simultaneously bored, bemused and mentally miles away. Bell was tapping her hooves – seemingly out of impatience, until Twilight realized she was tapping to a beat while slightly swaying and nodding her head in time. Polly, on the other hand was focused and alert. Unnervingly, she was looking directly at Twilight, and she made and held eye contact once Twilight noticed.

That's... creepy, the young princess thought to herself just before she broke eye contact.

“Hum-hm.”

Twilight looked back at Polly Tessa, whose gaze was now fixed on Rarity. The purple-pink politician pony now had a small smirk on her broad face.

Did she just...?

Before Twilight could work out if Polly had laughed or simply cleared her throat, Agit spoke. This seemed to surprise everypony else in the room.

“I don't see what's so special about this Evening Star,” he declared derisively. “She's isn't somepony. Not even anypony, just a nopony. I asked around, she doesn't even exist.”

“Excuse me?” Twilight blurted out.

“Hech-um.” Polly cleared her throat to gather attention.

“Igno~re him,” Bell cut Polly off. “He's just annoyed that nopony could tell him who you are befo~re we came here.”

Polly shot her a look like ice and smiled sickly-sweet at her. “My dear, dear Bell,” she intoned with a sugary voice that was as pleasing to the ear as having syrup poured into it. “What Agit was saying is that it seems our new acquaintance has only just joined The Club and hasn't made any friends yet.” Polly turned to look at Rarity, “However, that is the very reason you've invited us, isn't it Elusive? To help your friend make some new friends?”

“Oh, she doesn't need help with that,” Rarity quipped. “Actually, I thought it would be a shame if none of you had a chance to meet her. She'll be making waves in Canterlot soon enough. It can be awfully jarring, getting blindsided by somepony powerful you never even knew was out there,” she added bitterly.

“I'm afraid I can't relate, Elusive. Of course, I'd find it just terrible if your dear friend were to suffer such misfortune.” Polly's voice was thick with mock sympathy. “To that end, I propose a little test, just to see if she's as good at making friends as you say.”

“What sort of test?” Twilight asked apprehensively. “It had better not be something inappropriate.”

“Hum-hm!” Polly laughed with her hoof over her mouth. “Now, now, Evening Star, we mustn't let unsavory surroundings or… crude company color our thoughts so. No, no, no. I want you to show me that you can make waves as Elusive put it, let alone ride them in the first place.”

“You're proposing that she perform a political favor for you?” Rarity questioned.

“Yes. Let me explain: There is a special committee in Canterlot that neither of you may have heard of.”

“All this talk of committees and surfing,” Agit Prop complained. “As if doing things has anything to do with whether or not a pony is really somepony. What I want to know is, who has she got on hoof? Connectivity is essential to creativity, you know.”

“Quite right, Agit!”

“What?” Twilight and Bell blurted out in unison before looking at each other with surprise.

“It's simple, really,” Polly explained. “We do not shape the world, we shape the ponies living in our world. This is the essence of politics and art, alike.”

Twilight was beginning to see why Polly kept Agit around. His idiosyncrasies are easy to reshape or contextualize into something more eloquent that sounds profound because an “artist” supposedly said it.

“Though Agit's artistic temperament may leave no patience for bureaucracy, he has described the underlying point of my test. You see, I know about this council because I have friends on that council. I will help them correspond with you, through The Club. What I want you to do is obtain support for the bill they are writing, and help it pass the Parliament vote in a very short time.”

“What counts as very short?” Twilight asked.

“Oh, let's see if you can help us break the record for the quickest pass on a bill following it's introduction to the Court. Parliament will reconvene at the start of next month so…”

“The record..!” Rarity exclaimed. “The bill would have to pass within two days of being brought to the floor in Parliament. I don't think that's possible.”

Polly Tessa smiled slowly at Rarity, seemingly enjoying her incredulous outburst. Bell Weather and Agit Prop were both paying attention now and also seemed amused. Twilight suddenly felt that she and Rarity were being drawn into a scheme.

“Actually, there is already a plan in the works to make that happen. The new bill will hit the floor on the first of the month and it will be called to a vote the third; the absolute soonest it possibly can. I have confidence that the bill can and will pass. The only question is: How much support can we drum up in a couple days?”

“Ludicrous...” Rarity said dismissively as she shook her head. “That isn't even enough time...”

Bell completed the thought, “For a~nypony to read the bill? Why would they want to? A committee wrote it; that's good enough. As long as the bill is popular, they'll vote for it.”

“I suppose I'm just meant to blindly start convincing ponies that this bill is going to be worth voting for, without being able to tell them what's in it?” Twilight wondered.

Polly gave her most disarming smile and cocked her head just slightly. “Of course not, my dear Evening Star. I'll see to it that you have everything you think you need, when you need it. Just one minor stipulation: you mustn't tell a single pony about the bill before it's official announcement. You'll have two days to gather support. I'm facing those same odds, so it's quite fair.”

Twilight thought carefully, I can probably appear in Court in person and address the Parliament on the second day of Court. I just have to make the Club Elite and their little committee believe that Evening Star “convinced” Princess Twilight Sparkle to vouch for the bill. Of course, I can't take a risk like that without knowing what the bill contains...

“I'll need a copy of the bill as soon as possible,” the incognito alicorn demanded. “A final draft, nothing short of what the Parliament will actually vote into law.” With any luck, once the bill passes Parliament and moves on to Royal Review, Princess Celestia will take her time and catch anything amiss.

“You may consider it done,” Polly said, seemingly satisfied. “Bell Weather will bring it to Elusive who, in turn, I assume can pass it on to you.”

“Of course,” Rarity stated simply.

Bell let out an exaggerated sigh. “Can we finally leave and find something fun to do?”

“Actually,” Rarity interjected, “I have to ask, what does passing a bill in record time have to do with a socialite or an artist? Normally I expect the two of you to help garner public support for Polly's politics.”

Polly Tessa seemed taken aback at Rarity's query. She was so flustered that she couldn't form a proper response, “That's – it's not your, I mean, you shouldn't even… ask.”

Rarity looked impishly at her adversary and dryly remarked, “It's up to them if they want to answer such a question or not. It's clear that you accepted my invitation with this proposal in mind, and you could have come alone to give it. There are no malls or crowds of paparazzi for Bell to lavish in; there are no museums or galleries for Agit to scoff at. I can only assume they are equally interested in helping your… friends in the committee.”

“I wanted to go to the local spa but Polly said no when we got here, can you believe that?”

“An artist thinks outside of the boundaries of common perception by removing himself from the boundaries of common culture. There is so little culture or perception in this backwater town that I could practically drown in my own lack of thought.”

Those are the worst excuses I've ever heard. Also, I'm pretty sure Agit Prop just called himself empty-headed. Twilight had to bite her cheek to stop herself from laughing.

“Hm, I suppose I shouldn't have expected differently,” Rarity conceded. “Polly, what can Eve and I expect as compensation for acting as your representatives?”

“Well, I don't expect you to trouble yourself for my sake, dear,” Polly remarked discouragingly. “Eve on the other hand may expect introductions to other associates of mine and… a favor.”

Twilight couldn't work out what she meant. “A favor?”

“A favor. Take your time with it. Be sure you really need it,” Polly cautioned darkly. “That's assuming the bill passes and that you were helpful in making that happen.”

Twilight didn't have a chance to ask for an explanation before Polly abruptly declared the meet and greet over. The stout mare ushered her cohorts out quickly and Twilight and Rarity could only watch them leave.

“Good night!” Pinkie called after them as they vanished into the dark night. “Hope you had a good time! Please come again!” Pinkie shut the door and muttered to herself before turning to Twilight and Rarity. Her eyes were alight with curiosity and her voice cut with a bitterness Twilight didn't think Pinkie was capable of. “So, why were they here?”

“They were here because one does well to keep their enemies close,” Rarity said harshly. Then sensing that Pinkie was upset she added, “I'm sorry to have invited them during one of your parties. I'd been hearing whispers that they've been planning something and I needed to know if it was true. They have foalishly involved us in their latest scheme.”

Pinkie didn't say anything for a long moment; especially long for Pinkie. “I hope you know what you're doing. Don't get Evey in trouble.”

As Pinkie – seemingly cheerful again – returned to the party, Rarity prevented Twilight from following and scanned the crowd.

“Don't worry about Berry, she's just concerned. Right now we need to find Play Date.” Then she turned her full attention to Twilight. “How are you holding up, darling?”

“I think I'm OK. I can't really tell how well that went. I didn't learn anything useful about them, I'm about to try to help them pass some legislation that will surely benefit them in some way, and I'm afraid I won't be able to keep them guessing at who I am for very long. Actually, I take it back, I'm pretty sure tonight went badly.”

Rarity smiled as though she and Twilight were both privy to some in-joke before looking back at the party guests. “No worries, darling, it went much better than you think. Why do you suppose I showed you how to do your hair, despite very few other ponies in attendance having bothered? Or why I gave you a mask that covers your horn?”

Twilight only had to consider the question for a few seconds. “So my coat would be completely hidden. They don't know I'm purple, but I saw their coat colors. The stripe in my mane is less obvious too.”

“Indeed, they will be far easier to pick out. Bell was entirely shameless. She always is. I still can't tell you who she is, but now that you've seen her I'm sure you know.”

“Actually, no.”

Rarity turned to look at Twilight, surprise evident on her face. “Truly? I'll have to point you in the direction of a periodical reporting on her many scandals and exploits. Oh, look there!” Rarity pointed out Play Date near the snack bar. “We need to speak with her urgently.” Twilight followed Rarity closely as they weaved their way past promiscuous party-goers.

“Another thing,” Rarity continued. “Polly was careless in telling you about this committee and it's new bill. With prior knowledge of the bill and it's authors, we can uncover her latest scheme and undermine it. This will also help you to identify her.”

“I don't understand how this will help us stop them.”

“I may suffer some indignation at their hooves before this is done, but hopefully your identity will remain a mystery to the Club Elite and you can anonymously uncover evidence of their corruption. We can hold that over their heads in order to reign in their bad politics and force some decent behavior out of them. If push comes to shove, we can show Polly for the vile, manipulative witch she is, and have her removed from her position in Canterlot Court.”

“Well, is she a member of Parliament, or from one of the Noble Houses?”

“I can't say, and shush. Let's not discuss this in front of Play Date.”

Now that Twilight wasn't wearing dark sunglasses and could see the local Club registrar in a better lit environment that wasn't completely full of sex toys, she noticed Play Date's unusual Cutie Mark: a pink Hearts & Hooves heart that appeared to be melting. It was oddly provocative.

“Ms. Elusive, Ms. Star,” Play Date greeted them formally. “How are you enjoying your membership with The Club thus far?”

Twilight was tempted to ask Play Date if clandestine meetings and corrupt politics were typical aspects of Club membership, but decided against it. “I'm having fun, but I don't think I have a very good idea of what the Club is like yet. For one thing, what can you tell me about what registrars like yourself actually do?”

“Other than keep records and manage accounts?” Play Date thought aloud. “Well, we make arrangements for Club members to host events in reserved venues, handle Club mail, enforce Club rules–”

“The registrars enforce the rules?”

“Indirectly,” Play Date said reticently.

“As much as I'd like to let Eve ask you about everything she's been wondering about,” Rarity interrupted, “we don't have the time. I actually just came over to ask if we could make an appointment to meet with you tomorrow morning?”

“On official business? For what purpose?”

“Managing our accounts.”

“Oh sure, hon, doing a joint thing?”

“We may, I'll discuss the particulars with you in the morning. Early is best.”

“Come around when I open shop and we'll take care of it. Anything else?”

Rarity hooked her hoof around Twilight's leg and gently tugged as she said, “No, we've got to be going.”

Twilight was a little disappointed not to ask Play Date more about the Club, but allowed Rarity to walk her towards the door. Once they were out of earshot she asked, “Why are you in such a hurry?”

“I want you all to myself for the rest of the evening,” Rarity purred coquettishly. “We'll not have all night, unless you want to stay up till dawn.”

Twilight had forgotten Rarity's promise. After everything that happened tonight, do I still want to do this? The rising heat in her loins was answer enough, though Twilight couldn't shake her lingering doubts. Is it a good idea to be this intimate with one of my friends? What if it turns ugly? Can we remain friends? Can I really be satisfied with another mare? I always thought I was straight. Are we going to hide it from ponies that aren't in the Club?

Her thoughts were disrupted by a sudden tickling sensation that traced up her neck, under her chin, and across her face. The tip of Rarity's tail flicked across her nose, drawing her attention to the way Rarity's ass swayed as she walked out the door.

“Coming?” the seductive unicorn asked.

Twilight moved to follow, but was distracted when she heard Pinkie shout, “IT'S PONYATA TIME!” She slowed and looked back to see a pony laying in a swing like harness hanging from the ceiling. The mare was enveloped entirely in latex, only the space between her legs was visible, but the ponyata's privates were facing the other way. Even the color of the pony's tail was obscured by what looked like rainbow colored streamers braided into it. Twilight felt like she was about to make a connection of some kind, or remember something important, when Rarity wrapped her tail around Twilight's neck and pulled her out into the cool night.