Post Unity

by Crazyjabberwock

Rating: teen
Tags: Crossover, Alternate Universe, Gore, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Adventure
Length: 2624

In the Equestrian Wasteland Fair Trade has found himself in debt to an Alicorn commune, but paying it off will be neither easy nor predictable

Fair Trade is a unicorn with a basic idea on how to run his life in the wasteland after the Gardens were activated. Help only yourself unless you owe somepony or stand to gain from it, and don't make yourself a problem to others unless they make themselves your problem. Now he owes an Alicorn commune his life and paying that off is going to take much more commitment than he's used to, He'll try to grin and bear it, but how much of the hardships and insanity of the wasteland can he take before he loses his mind? Probably not as much as he thinks......

Figured this setting could use some more Episodic spin-offs
Takes place after the events of Fallout Equestria but before the afterwards.

Published 2013-09-30 12:20:02 UTC
Last updated 2013-09-30 12:20:02 UTC

Prologue

Post Unity

Prologue

So some of the ladies here recommended I start a journal to keep myself sane. Well if it works well enough for memory addled mutants it should work for me. My name is Fair Trade; A Unicorn born on a small no-name settlement that has since packed up and moved on. My foalhood was rather dull save the occasional raider or animal attack. Seeing a number of ponies try and run off and be a hero in one way or another and mess up by either dying or just making things worse, taught me that ponies should generally stick to their own business unless it makes itself their business, they have something to gain from it or actually owe something.

Not long after working out a trade agreement with some mercs to route out a persistent raider nest in exchange for food and weapon maintenance (a deal which the rest of the town was having difficulty sealing at the time) I gained my Cutie Mark (a satchel of supplies and a plate of various forms of currency/commodities). Naturally I became a trader when I grew up, and it wasn't long after I got started with my business as part of some caravans that all the crazy stuff began happening.

It started when my current caravan got ambushed by a trio of Alicorns, We weren't really fighters at the time and I have since put some practice time in, learning with my weapon inventory before it changes hooves. The bitches had us cornered when they just suddenly stopped. Then they started screaming and just flew off. Later on, news of the explosion was on the radio. Soon after that whole “Day of Sunshine and Rainbows” thing happened. Now I'll admit that did brighten up my world view, and not just because of the physical light, I mean holy crap, ponies actually gave two shits about the world now.

That said I found that the best way I could contribute to the efforts of making this “nation” better, was to just continue doing what I was doing. Some time passed and they managed to turn on the Gardens of Equestria, but naturally the law of unintended consequences reared its ugly head. Plenty of the Ghouls still capable of thought had an issue with the land being free of radiation as they kinda need that to live.

So they sent out expeditions outside of equestria to get contaminated water, not a task I envy at all. And of course some dumb ass had the bright idea to transport a big shipment on a BARGE floating on a river through the section of land I do my trading on. “yeah sure that won’t cause problems, as long as it doesn't capsize!” So slowly but surly radiation has been spreading through this little region, attracting Ghouls (both sane and feral) Alicorns and radiation loving critters, including Golden Salamanders, I fucking hate those things.

Anyway, my main goal for about a year was saving up to buy myself one of those fancy Pip-Bucks. I had finally obtained one a day ago when we stumbled onto a nest of Fire Salamanders, did I mention how much I hated Salamanders? Bastards toasted up my whole caravan, decent folk I’m sure, but I didn't know them well enough to really grieve. That was due to my caravan regularly rotating with ponies moving in and out of the job all the time, but I digress. I managed to kill the fuckers by tossing my ammo and grenade sacks at their fiery maws, I was alive, but barely.

In the chaos I lost track of the trail, and I hadn't gotten the locations saved to my Pip-Buck yet. So I limped along, with third degree burns from the Salamanders and the explosion, and no supplies. Figures things start getting good and I end up dying. Then I saw a walled off area in the distance. It was a ski lodge, how the fuck did I end up all the way in the hills!? Whatever, it looked inhabited. Then I remembered, I had heard from the radio that a bunch of Alicorns had set up shop in an old Ski Lodge. Now most of them had been minding their own business, but that hadn't given me much reason to trust them. And then I remembered that I was dying and they were still my best chance of not dying. I found the strength to limp to the gate door, knock twice and collapse.

---Footnote---
Trait selected: Wild Wasteland
Wild Wasteland unleashes the most bizarre and silly elements of post-apocalyptic Equestria. Not for the faint of heart or the serious of temperament.

Author's Note

And So I make my dive into writing on this site, you can thank the posters on /mlp/ for both inspiring and encouraging me to start this project, I am likely to be busy for the first month or so, meaning timely updates are not guaranteed. Hope you enjoy and feel free to offer feedback and criticism.

Waking among the Muties

Chapter One: Waking among the Muties

Pain, lots of pain is what I felt as I woke up. I guess with time to rest the adrenalin wore off and the body decided to comprehend it. The first thing I noticed was my body covered in numerous bandages. Ah,good old healing bandages I knowing these things I should be good to go in about a day. The next thing I noticed was my bed side attendant, a green Alicorn.

I tried to contain my moment of panic with logic. I’m being healed so they don’t want me dead, taint doesn't exist anymore so they can’t use me for experiments, they clearly have my well being in mind, or at least this one does.

“Glad to see you've woken up, you think you can walk?” She asked me, sounding eager to know me.
“Maybe in an hour when I feel something other than pain...” I answered back honestly, struggling to talk more than I had expected.
“Maybe I could give you some Med-X, or use a numbing spell to help?” She chirped back, she wanted to keep the interaction up. I did not.

“No thanks, I've seen how addictive Med-X can be, and a numbing spell would have me paralyzed.” Greenie looked at me with skepticism; she could probably tell I didn't fully trust her. Fair enough, alicorns are lots of things; stupid is not one of them. No doubt they're used to a lot of stupid grudges being held on them.

Now some have said that they should be held at fault for defending themselves against ponies seeking revenge on them, but I say, if you are going to let your anger and bitterness pick your battles for you, you probably have it coming. Seeing no polite way to press me she left me to my pain (writing that now feels way more melodramatic than it was), leaving a glass of water in my reach.

Well my horn still worked that was good. I could drink this without moving a muscle, that’s the thing about waking up; you never know just how thirsty you are until you drink some water. Sucked it down fast and then got very bored.

Greenie came back with more water a few minutes later. I probably should have thanked her but at the time my apprehension was still getting the better of me. She spoke first “What’s your name?”
“Wha?” I replied dumbly
“Your name, I can't just call you, “pony” now can I?” She Grinned, probably feeling a bit clever.
“Fair Trade” I mumbled back, she perked her eyes at my name. In hindsight it was obvious her mind was at work, using that one bit of info to get an idea of who I was. Names always did have an odd tendency to match up with who a pony was or at least was going to be.

“When you’re ready to move, you want to take a little tour before you leave?” she offered to me, Greenie was being friendly enough with me, but for all I knew she was the best they had at this, and I was a bit scared being in this place at all.

On the other hoof, how many chances do outsiders get to look inside an alicorn commune? Hell, even Pip wasn't allowed to look inside from what I've read and heard.

Not that I can really blame them on that front for being scared of her. She did kind of kill a bunch of them and blow up their Leader. After mulling it over, curiosity won over caution, and I accepted the offer. After an hour I was feeling up for the walk.

As the green alicorn guided me down stairs she glossed over basics like the kitchen or main lobby. Then she began moving into more interesting areas, which were actually off limits so I only saw the doors to those places.

Breeding Experiment lab, humane aberration containment, psychological assistance was actually open and looked like a typical counseling room. In the out side area I could see why this place had been picked, the lodge was just the opening to a larger resort that due to the isolation was pretty much all their property now.

The resort had been converted into a small town, which they dubbed “Absolution”, kinda dramatic for my tastes but that seemed to be how alicorns roll. Most of its residents were predictably blank-flanked, but a few did have cutie marks.

I had just seen a small group wearing odd cape/scarf things, when a blue alicorn with an hourglass mark came up to us asking, “Fair Trade I presume?”
“Yeah that’s me.” I replied. In hindsight I really should have questioned how she knew that. I had only told Greenie my name so far.

“My name is Minuette, I was told by the Magistrate to continue your tour in her place, feel free to take a break” she told Greenie, I suddenly felt just a bit bad for having never bothered to ask her name. Trust or not that was just rude. I decided to get to the important issues. I had a debt that needed repaying, and I had no clue how to do it so I asked ,“Can we just skip to when I see this Magistrate. I think I may have something to discus with her.” Minuette nodded and quickly escorted me back inside and upstairs.

The blue alicorn stopped at a door marked, “Lodge Manager”. “She’s in here” Minuette stated plainly. Not needing much in the way of hints I entered. As I did she seemed to begin fixating on a nearby mirror on the wall, muttering something to herself that I couldn't make out. Inside the Office sat a purple alicorn, her mane was in a bun and she was, wearing glasses?

“Why the heck are you wearing glasses? Doesn't your kind have 20/20 vision?” ended up being my first stupid question.
She lifted an eyebrow at me and replied “Because they help give the appearance of an administrator, creating an air of authority without looking like I’m trying to be royalty also, an introduction would have been nice.”

Conceding, I stated “Okay then, my name is Fair Trade, and you are?”

“Magistrate Daybreak Luster” She chirped back, I’m guessing she had been practicing this introduction. “Now, you asked to see me. I take it was for more than to question my fashion tastes?”

“Well we won’t trust each other unless we are completely honest so I’ll just say it. Any problems you may have are not mine. I feel that most ponies should be solving their own problems for themselves but your little group here saved my life and I owe you for that. Problem is that I've never had to pay off this big a debt. so my only option is to ask what you think is fair?”

She thought for a moment, lifting up a set of papers to log something into, and spoke “Well, if you want fair exchange for your life? You could act as our on call liaison from here on out. I promise that you won’t be demanded at all times. In fact for the most part you can carry on as you have been for most of the time, but you will need to be available at any time.”

Freelance Indentured servitude? I could think of worse payment plans. “If I am going to be on call, I should probably set up my new home here.” I said with some resignation. Fair or not, this was going to mess with my life big time and I knew it.

“There are rooms available in the lodge they should be quite comfortable.” She said curtly.

Then the obvious question hit me “Wait a minute you’re, running a small herd of immortal, super strong, magically gifted, flying, psychic amazons, Why the hell do any of you need my help?”

Daybreak leaned in closely “It’s my turn to be absolutely honest with you. It’s because, contrary to our popular image, none of us have a fucking clue what we are doing.” She stated without changing her tone.

“What?” I blurted back incredulously. With the walling off and the aloof attitude and general alienness, I was under the impression they had some kind of plan for sorting themselves out.

She looked at me as if what came next should have been obvious and began a bit of a rant. “Do you think that any of us have a clue what to do after Pip blew up the Goddess? NO!” She started losing composure. “2 thirds of us have no memories to work with, buried deep in our subconscious at best."

"The remaining third has fragmented memories at best with the most intact having only pre-unity or time as a drone to work with! And don't even get me started on the killing joke experiments! The last attempt nearly drowned four of our researchers in infertile seed!!

I winced at the image.

She looked just a bit frazzled but with her rant over she recomposed herself. “And, beyond that we need your help because if we don’t allow some of the outside world in it will crash in like a flood of paranoia and old grudges. And frankly you probably have more common sense than most of us here.”

Well she had me convinced. I agreed on the conditions that they provide me with good food along with the shelter, let me keep any reasonable loot I find on the job, and that they let me finish recovering before they put me on the job. As I left the office I saw Minuette still fussing over the mirror and I could here her quietly whine “and after all this, I'm still not Ginger…”

I chose to ignore miss vanity. She had at least reclaimed her cutie mark, which was more than most of these freaks could say. I decided to scope out my new room and settle in for the night.

---Foot Note---
Level 1

Level up Progress 40%

New Wild Wasteland Encounter: Not so victorious

Author's Note

Just a quick explanation, as each chapter is his journal entrees, each chapter is written with the benefit of hindsight, at the very least for the events of that chapter, sometimes more depending on the situations.

UPDATE: Apologies to anyone who likes this story, but my heart isn't in it, I've actually lost much of my liking for the Fallout Equestria Stories lately and my interest in updating this one is kinda gone, Sorry to anyone I've disappointed.