Looking Back

by BronyPinkamena

Rating: teen
Tags: Sad, Dark, Tragedy, Slice of Life
Length: 1478

Pinkie Pie takes a trip to the past in a dream.

Pinkie Pie dreams of what happened in her childhood. She finds the monster in herself and realize life isn't just flowers and cupcakes.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2013-10-09 01:50:16 UTC

Dozing Off

Sleep. Nice, peaceful sleep. Sleep can be so great sometimes. If you're stressed, tired, or just need to escape life for a while. But sometimes sleep isn't so peaceful. And sometimes you escape life for more than "a while". Pinkie Pie finally fell asleep after thinking about the party for Spike. Pinkie hated sleeping; she thought of it as if its less time for fun. And Pinkie Pie does NOT like missing out on fun. However she knew it was necessary. But when she fell asleep this night, she felt something taking over. Something EVIL. Pinkie Pie sensed something new. New, but familiar. She felt something was different. But the strange part was that she KNEW she was sleeping. She knew that this was going to be a long, long dream. Pinkie could tell she wasn't going to wake up for a while. She realized that there was no escaping. Suddenly, she heard a hoarse, yet soft and delicate voice trying

to tell her something.

"We meet once again, Miss Pie."

"Really? I don't recall knowing you. My bad!" She said in her high, innocent voice.

" Your happy little outlook on everything is so entertaining, young one."

"Thanks! Umm... Yours... Too."

"Yes, well being trapped for so long isn't sunshine and daisies Miss Pie."

"You were trapped? That's horrible!"

"Yes Miss Pie, I couldn't agree more." The mysterious pony's voice started to sound more aggressive.

"Well are you okay? Where were you?"

"Actually, I was in you. I've ALWAYS been in you. And I always will be."

"Oh. Err... Okay." Pinkie Pie was starting to think there is something mysterious about this pony.

"My name is Pinkamena."

"Oh. Sounds familiar! I'm Pinkie Pie!"

"Oh young pony, but you're not. YOU are Pinkamena. I am Pinkamena. WE are Pinkamena."

''Oh. Well I think I'd remember being named Pinkamena." Pinkie tried to reason with this being.

"Well MAYBE you should think again. Young pony, tell me what you see right now."

"Well I don't see anything. Just darkness. Wait, now I see myself. But I look... Different. Sadder. But when I talk, I don't see my mouth moving.

"Is your mouth moving NOW?" The mysterious entity said.

"Yes! Wait no. Only when you talk. But it's me. Not you. Wait... I'm confused."

"You always have been. Miss Pie, can you see me?"

No! I can only see MYSELF!" Pinkie Pie started to get frustrated.

"Well what do you see behind you?"

"Nothing. Just.... Darkness. Not normal darkness though. REALLY dark darkness."

"Right... Well tell me. Do you remember your childhood?"

"No."

"When I say the word rock, what do you think of?"

"Well, I think of rocks. At least I usually do. When you say it, it sounds... Different."

"Perfect."

Who is Pinkamena?

"I'm still confused. Seriously, are you a ghost or something?" Pinkie asked."You could say that", the strange voice replied.

"Ooh, are you the ghost of a zombie? Because zombies are scary!" Pinkie innocently stated.

"I'm not a zombie ghost. But trust me Miss Pie, I'm VERY scary."

Pinkie still didn't understand any of this. How could she? None of it made any sense. It was downright inexplicable. "Let me take you back Miss Pie." And just like that, Pinkie found herself at the old rock farm. She was looking at her ma yelling at her sister. "You children don't appreciate anything. Sure, your dinner may be made of rocks. What does it matter? You children dread the thought of dinner! Well guess what? Imagine not even knowing if you were GETTING dinner!" "Exactly," she could hear her father's rough voice,"You kids don't even deserve to live on this beautiful land!" Pinkie saw the sadder version of her again next to her saying, "All I ever wanted was to please him. And all I ever did was FAILED.Do you know what fail means, Princess? Oh that's right, you don't. Because your mind is merely filled with sunshine and rainbows! Well guess what! Not everyone gets to live in PinkieVille." Pinkie wanted to know more about what this 'Saddy Pie', as she would say, had to say. She then heard her say in a deep, spooky voice,"NOT EVERYONE GETS TO BE HAPPY." "We'll that's plain horrible!" She innocently replied. "Predictable Pinkie. Well guess what. All I ever wanted was to be happy. All I ever wanted was to get to have the same joy as others. But I was cheated. They got their happiness. And guess what I got. ROCKS. STUPID, STUPID ROCKS." Pinkie's eyes followed Pinkamena as she slowly strutted around. "You have everything. You mindless, little THIEF!" "That's not very nice to say!" Pinkie exclaimed. "Well guess what. The world isn't very nice. Tell me Pinkie, do you remember your childhood?" "Yep! I grew up in the bake shop! That's where I learned to make cupcakes, and brownies, and other bakery delights!" "Your'e a delight Pinkie." "Thank you!" "IT WASN'T A COMPLIMENT!""Oh."

"And that wasn't your childhood. It's just what you remember. That's because I lived your childhood. I lived the hard parts FOR you.""Well that's VERY nice!""Oh Pinkie. When will you learn? I'm not NICE. YOU'RE not nice. WE'RE not nice."

"Well maybe you shouldn't be such a grumpy-pants!""SHUT UP MERE ONE!" Pinkamena's voice angered Suddenly, Pinkamena's father started beating her sister."You shouldn't do that! Apologize to her! NOW!" Pinkie scolded her father.

"Silly pony, they can't hear you. They can't hear me either. This is a flashback. But they can hear filly me. See, there I am."

(Filly Pinkamena) "Father, you truly are a despicable pony. I'm done trying to please you." "You should have stopped trying a long time ago. You never will please me. You never have and never will.", said her father.

(Present Pinkamena) "Those words echoed in my brain Miss Pie. Well, our brain."

"Weird, considering its a rock farm, not a cave. Wow, did I just say something smart?"

"You never did have a bright mind. At least you didn't have a dark mind, like me."

"But you've been saying this whole time that I AM you!"

"Well, it's complicated. YOU wouldn't understand honey."

"Oh. I wouldn't?"

"You're much too happy."

"I'm not THAT happy." Pinkie said.

"Yes you are. You shouldn't be though, considering everyone in your life thinks your'e dumb and hates you."

"Not true!"

"True indeed. They have to make everything they say more simple when you're around because you're so dumb. Not surprising you're so dumb though. You've lost a while of education. You know, since you don't remember anything from your filly years since I had to live them FOR you."

"I- I don't g-get you." Pinkie stumbled upon her words, knowing that for sure Pinkamena would contradict her.

"Not surprising. You don't get anything. Because the world is so simple for you. It's like you live in a dream. But guess what. Guess what. I am your opposite. I live in a nightmare. You do too. You just don't realize it yet. Everyone thinks you're dumb and hates you. You shouldn't be happy. Wait till you find your nightmare. Then you'll understand."

"I DON'T LIVE IN A NIGHTMARE! LEAVE ME ALONE!"

"Oh, so I see. The anger is teeming out of your top. I see myself in you. Probably because you ARE me." Pinkamena was obviously very clever.

"I'M NOT YOU! AND I'M NOT DUMB AND EVERYBODY LOVES ME! EVERYONE HATES YOU! WITH GOOD REASON! NOW STOP TRYING TO MAKE ME SAD!"

"Oh Miss Pie, dear, I'm not making you sad. The sadness is already in you. It's always been in you. You're just finding it now."

Muffin

"So Pinkie, lately I've been thinking about what I want to do with my life." , said Spike.  "So I've been thinking about baking!"

"REALLY?!?!?  So someone could maybe say I'm your INSPIRATION?!?!"  Pinkie exclaimed.  "We'll, I suppose so."  Spike

said.  "AWESOME AWESOME AWESOME!"  Pinkie over excitedly said.  "Will you just taste my muffin?"  Spike weakly

smiled.  "Oh sure."  Said Pinkie.

She took a bite out of it, paused with a blank expression on her face, and just stared at

Spike for a moment.  He looked sort of anxious and was waiting for something to happen.  "I.... LOVE IT!"  Said Pinkie.

"Really?"  Spike asked.  "Oh Yes!"  Pinkie said with a smile.  "You are a true talent Spike!"  She made him feel like a

million dollars.  "Wow Spike, it looks like you are a fairly good baker!"  Twilight said. "Heh, fairly? Are you kidding me? I'm a star!"

Spike said, starting to grow a big head.  "Well I should get going guys!  Bye Twilight!  Bye my little mini baker!"  Said

Pinkie.  She went home and jumped into bed.  She started to consider throwing Spike a party.  " Any excuse for a party will work!"

She chuckled to herself.

However when she started to doze off, she wasn't as cheery as she was one she was awake.  She felt something take over her.

Something by the name of Pinkamena Diane Pie.