Friendship: Reanimation

Prologue

A flash of blinding pink light… a roar of thunder… a scream…someone was screaming but even this loud sound, which arose all around me, vanished in the enveloping, thick darkness. Floating inside the black pool which consisted from unknown substance I could feel myself falling, but there was no bottom, nor was there anything up or around me. In fact… I began to wonder if I was falling at all or if everything around me was simply rising, as there was no familiar feeling of wind on my back.

Trapped inside this prison…

I tried to move my limbs but there was no response…did I still had any of my limbs? No longer was I certain about it. Searching inside myself, I tried to concentrate on my feelings…there were there right? The primal feeling of existence which let me feel alive. All of my memories seemed foggy and inconsistent and I felt odd certainty that something bad happened but my mind refused to look back as if protecting me from harm… still, I persisted, I wanted to know what I was and what was taken away from me.

No salvation anywhere…

I wanted to scream but no sound came, I wanted to run but no legs were found… As I continued my struggle the realization hit me…I was alone and afraid. The warmth that I once knew, no longer resided inside me, the ethereal feeling of closeness stolen away.

Fear overtook my senses…

Striped from everything I just wanted it to be over… this state of non existing. I wanted something to happen and so, my mind began to throw me random ideas…like it always did, or so I thought It used to be that way.

My imagination, my only escape…

Images flowed through my mind, some pleasant, others chilling me to the bone. Tears didn’t fall, no sound was heard, but there was something. A spark of feeling long forgotten, one that I yearned to re-discover again but couldn’t do it on my own… something akin to a key was missing and there was no lock in sight…

There was path home, but I lost it somewhere…

The more I stayed inside the darkness the emptier I felt, as if my very soul was sucked out of me, colors fading, sadness painting over pieces of my broken heart…little did I know that it was only beginning of a true nightmare, one that will lead me through many horrors that only life can offer…but onward, towards new adventure.

Horrors awaited, slowly tearing me apart…

I think I remember my name… it is Spike or so I think someone used to call me like that, someone close to me… I don’t remember that person but my mind refuses to forget its existence. This one small spark of recognition made me want to tell that person this story… even if I don’t remember who it is…

But you were there and your warm light…

I just don’t want to be alone anymore, with the pain, anger and the suffering. I think it is time to wake up finally…simply come out of the illusion and everything will be alright…or will it be? Something was lost along the long way, will it be discovered again? Maybe not, but it is worth a try. My will steeled, resolve made, I will with all my existence to escape… to break free from invisible shackles. There is fear in me, I’m afraid of unknown but someone once told me that sometimes you just have to be brave… I believe that person and know that the pain will soon go away. Now… I wake up… to my lost freedom…

You gave me hope, returned my heart…

Chapter 1 - Awakening

Beep…Beep…Beeep…*click*

Made the sound small cell phone until it was silenced by a slim male hand. As soon as the hellish device stopped its annoying beeping, a muffed groan was heard coming from under the sheets and soon the owner of the room sat up on the simple bed while rubbing his tired eyes with his left hand. Whatever dream he had was long forgotten by now as he looked at the calendar on nearby wall.

I hate Mondays – his thoughts wandered seeing the date as he prepared to get up. The wood cracked slightly as he finally stood up, looking around his room in disbelief with his green eyes. There was a black desk before him where his old computer was humming silently, books and other stuff. To his right was the wardrobe but it was empty now, as his clothes lay around on the floor in disarray. One could certainly say that it was unclean mess which would not offend the owner as it was a simple fact.

Sighing to himself, the young boy, nearly and adult now made his way through his possessions, towards the door, but as soon as he touched the handle, loud voices of his parents could be heard as they ‘talked’ like they always did.

“I don’t care, soon he will be over eighteen and that means we have no obligation to keep him or feed him anymore. Either he starts to bring money home or he is out!” He could clearly hear rough voice of his father who he hated with all his heart. The old man was as always drinking from the early morning  and was already going about his only son bringing money while he himself was just a lazy drunkard . He heard this every single day of the past year and the fear for his very life chilled him to the bone as the feeling of executioner’s ax was looming over his head.

Remaining quiet he decided to listen further even if he already knew what his mother would say in reply. “I full agree with you dear.” Sounded the little, scarred voice. His mother was a coward… a rat, only covering herself, never protecting him like a mother should, remaining content as long as the head of the house wasn’t threatening her. Too scared to simply leave, she always followed his every whim…For the boy she was no more than a simple stranger who happened to share the same hell on earth.

Before making his way out of his room, the young boy looked at his reflection in the mirror on the wall, hating everything about his life and especially himself. His tired eyes were bloodshot and his body was very thin, the marks leaved by not eating properly and abuses of past clearly showing. He was soon going to turn eighteen soon but instead of being happy like most teenagers his age, he was actually scarred…because it won’t be freedom he will gain but even more torture.

Why me? – He thought to himself, closing his heavy eyelids, as he tried to remember all of his life.

From the very early years he had it rough. His father always drank and would hit him and his mother over everything or just for fun…often would his own mother say that everything was “the kid fault” for which he suffered more. He clenched his fists, remembering how cowardly it was of her but couldn’t bring himself to cry for his tears already stopped falling long ago.

School wasn’t any better. He never had any friends…the only one that was made, was yelled at by his very father, which made other kids fear him. Always alone, he grew up never knowing the meaning of friendship, never having anyone to talk to. Bitterness filled his whole life but he always moved forward with small hope that one day something will change… and where did it lead him? Nearly an adult, he  still suffered and no salvation ever came, no friends were made, no understanding offered, no comfort. Day after day he suffered, trapped in cage of loneliness, convincing himself that he doesn’t need anyone, that he is perfectly capable of living his own life. Of course all of this didn’t mean he could withstand everything. He attempted suicide four times but he could never bring himself to end it like he should. His life was the only thing he had in this rotten world and he decided long ago never to give up because it would be the ultimate victory of his life over him… looking closer at his reflection in mirror, he began to wonder if it was the right choice.

Never give up, no matter how bad hand of cards the life gives you…what a nonsense – He thought, jaw clenched tight. He remembered countless times when he tried to turn everything around but there was always some obstacle. No money, no friends, no place to go, no knowledge, his father, bullies at school… always something that kept him from happiness. If God was out there somewhere, he wondered why did he have to suffer, but the answer was obvious… he simply did.

Sighing to himself heavily, he looked at his computer. One may say that living his days before the monitor wasn’t healthy or good but for the boy it was the temporary escape from reality that he loathed. After every week in which he tried to look for work, failing day after day because he never had any friend that would recommend him, he would sit before the machine to learn, to read… he especially enjoyed reading stories from his favorite shows and games. The fan-fictions were there for him, teaching him about that which he never got… the lessons of friendship, the meaning of love, the true fear, the reason to be sad, the world he never knew…it all was there, even if he couldn’t fully experience it. Those who wrote those stories were great people in his opinion for they shared their perspective on life which was implicated between  words they expressed.

He especially enjoyed more naïve series because they offered the purity, the adventures for both young and old audience which warmed his cold heart for short periods of time. Often would he find himself wishing to be in one of those worlds to have adventures along many friends, instead of everyday spent in this hell on earth…but nothing ever happened and years were wasted time and time again.

As another heavy sigh escaped his thin lips, he braced himself before meeting up with his parents,  deciding that he already lost too much time daydreaming… he needed to look for work, even if it was a lost cause since in the small town where he lived no one had need of his knowledge…the friends were what counted and he didn’t had any. Pressing the handle, he opened the door and entered the Pandora box which he knew by the name of the living room.

***Later***

Later the same day, the tired silhouette of the boy  slipped once again inside the messy room. Moving his heavy legs forward he didn’t bother to look on what part of his wardrobe he stepped on. He was glad that it was quiet now as his father went to drink outside which offered some silence for his tired mind. Everything looked the same and nothing changed… it never did.

Tiredly looking at his computer, he slowly made his way to the chair, sat down and started to browse the stories. Recently he found new series going by the title of “My Little Pony – Friendship is Magic”. The title at first sounded awfully cheesy to him… it was too sweet… he felt that he could puke with rainbow  for it was too… no right word came to mind, BUT…

He decided to give it a try and it quickly absorbed his attention. With every single episode he watched, there was something that kept him going… as if some big mystery awaited him at the end. He liked the feeling while it lasted but it ended…like it always did. The very last episode which went by the title “Magical Mystery Cure” left him hungry for more, even if Twilight Sparkle becoming an Alicorn hurt him for some reason…he didn’t see anything happy about it for he couldn’t believe the quiet mare would like to be in the center of attention wherever she went.

After watching the main show, he decided to see the movie…but somehow he didn’t enjoy it one bit. It seemed off, it was too disconnected from the main series, it was like a badly written fan-fiction, especially Flash Sentry who reminded him more of an badly written OC. Twilight, his favorite character also was out of character out there. As far as he knew the character personality, it wasn’t supposed to fall for someone because accidently bumping into him… this movie was a failure in his opinion, especially when Spike, by all means intelligent creature became a dog instead of human like Twilight. The whole thing just felt wrong to him.

As soon as he watched all of the media and read all the comics, he decided to browse for art and fan-fiction and was astonished to find the whole site dedicated to this series… it didn’t happen most of the time with popular shows and it was a pleasant surprise. His happiness was short lived as the search engine annoyed him greatly, for he couldn’t easily find stories with his favorite pairing by writing in search bar stuff like “Spilight”, “SpikexTwilight”, “Twispike” or “Twike”. Using tags like Spike, Romance, Twilight in any combination also didn’t work well, since he found too much and couldn’t narrow his search enough… it frustrated him.

He was thankful however that there were two groups  that managed to get some of the stories in one place which helped him greatly. Clop-fiction still was a territory that he felt unsure about but read some  of them anyway. While he thought that mature acts are the form of love, some of them really started too soon and for various, sometimes random and silly reasons… still, it was a work someone did and it deserved recognition, no matter how mad the whole idea was.

Today, like he always did after tiring day, he too was searching for story which would occupy his time and will sweep his mind away from the reality. Browsing through the links, he soon found the title that made him cast a curious glace “Friendship: Reanimation”. The title sounded awful. Whoever came up with something so lame, clearly was trying to sound awesome by making it resemble one of Matrix titles… in the boy opinion that person failed miserably. Nonetheless, he read the description and it seemed to be a Spilight story which was enough for the boy. Clicking on the link he opened the first chapter, which seemed to be a short prologue and started to read curiously.

As the letters slowly went before his eyes, his mind slowly started showing him images and an odd sense of déjà vu dawned on him… his attention absorbed fully when the feelings of void enveloped  his heart, pumping blood faster and sending chill run down his spine.

The more he read of the strange prologue, the more fear overtook him. He could feel himself sweating uncontrollably,  but continued, unable to move his head away, familiar images went through his mind paralyzing him completely, each like a thunder that hit him. The sounds of surroundings and the quiet hum of computer went away unnoticed as he trembled all over, not noticing small cracks around the room, as it slowly fall apart, exposing the darkness, as if somebody would crack the reality around him.

He sat in there like a stone gargoyle, eyes no longer looking at the luminescent glow of monitor but staring deep inside the darkness… He was no longer sure if he was sitting or standing, as only the feeling of existing burned inside him. The memories flooded his mind, the past experiences exploding in a myriad of colors as his heart throbbed and head radiated from too much feelings which awoke from long slumber. He found the key to the lock he himself created… he was finally… free…

He looked down at his purple scaly hands which felt both familiar and alien to him. Moving his talons in recognition a new wave of memories of last day in Ponyville assaulted him with more strength than others as something clicked in his mind, broken pieces becoming one again.

***Flashback***

Deep under the Golden Oak Library, two creatures were moving about the small room, their actions calculated, with purpose, as they prepared everything for what was to come. The laboratory housed many vials, magic circle, ingredients and books…especially books but not those that would be upstairs for everypony to borrow… those were special, only to be used by the owner of this house and nopony else.

“I don’t know about this Twilight…this spell looks too complicated.” Said nervously the small, purple dragon, looking at the lavender mare to his left, while holding the book in his claws. The newly crowned alicorn however didn’t seem to hear him at first as she continued to double check many preparations which were made. Upon finishing, she gave a content smile and looked at her number one assistant.

“Relax Spike, I did enough research and the deadline that Princess Celestia set is coming closer and closer.” Came her reassuring reply but for some reason he didn’t feel calmed. His life-long friend often was rash in her actions, especially when it came to research for the goddess of sun and he knew Twilight long enough to recognize nervousness in her voice… she wasn’t sure about herself and it was up to Spike to change her mind about the whole idea.

“But the Princess wouldn’t want you to try casting it, even if the deadline was near!” He reasoned while arguing back, but already knew that it was pointless. Once Twilight assured herself that she needs to do something on time, she simply did and never listened to the baby dragon. He often wished to be bigger for maybe then, he could sound more… intimidating.

“If the Princess gave me a deadline like this, it must mean she is confident in my skill to finish my assignment on time. This means I must be ready Spike.” Argued Twilight Sparkle while furrowing her eyebrows at her assistant, trying once again to calm him down. Spotting the unsure look in his green eyes she smiled more warmly, for she quickly recognized that there was further need to reassure him but different approach was needed. After all what could go wrong?

“Listen. I’m only sending one apple to the void and its mass is not so big. If it won’t work then nothing dangerous happens because the un-stability of magic power would revert it back to original source without any problems. Also the matrix of magic which I studied, clearly says that if sufficient energy is gathered, then any backfire which could occur results in nothing more than a little tear in aura which is flexible enough to revert back to its original shape ” Smiled the alicorn innocently, readying herself to cast her new spell oblivious to the fact that her number one assistant looked at her with dumbfounded expression. He didn’t know what she said exactly… or rather, he didn’t bother to ponder about it but knew that by this point that there was no stopping her.

“Whatever you said Twi…If you are sure…do it” He said with heavy sigh and watched the alicorn gather pink energy around her horn. With heavy concentration, there was a burst of magical power which made Spike close his eyes in fright for the pink explosion of power blinded him. He could hear something…a scream? He decided to open his eyes but all he saw was pitch black… and he… no longer knew who or where he was.

As the memories faded away, dissipating in darkness all that remained was a silhouette of purple dragon, trembling all over his body. His scaly lips moved silently time and time again, tears poured from his green eyes, vanishing slowly in the depths… as his body began losing its form, the nature of his being undone little by little.

***End Flashback***

As the memory played before his eyes, the dragon looked around, the blackness of this place no longer frightening, the events of past no longer missing and his body restored to its true form… illusions vanished and there was something he needed to do… a purpose in his existence… a need to escape from here and see…

“T-twilight…” He whispered with hoarse voice, as it went around in endless space. With the corner of his eye, he saw something…a little point of light. Emerald eyes opened with fright but filled with renewed hope at the little point for it meant everything to him in this dark place. Slowly, he lifted his leg and started to moved, tired but determined steps… he was staggering but stopping was not an option. As Spike continued through seemingly endless darkness he neared the ball of light which grew bigger with his every step. It could be a way home, he could feel it and nothing would stop him this time.

Coming closer and closer he could feel himself regaining more and more of his confidence. It was an exit, he was now sure of it, he could feel it with his whole being. When he was close enough the sphere of light floated before him, its size no bigger than soccer ball. Inspecting it closer, it seemed to react to his presence… but was it harmless? Unsure of what to do, he slowly extended his claw and the world around him exploded with sounds, smells, sights and other wonders which he thought to be a distant memory, as all vanished around him…

***Sweet Apple Acres***

It was another sunny day inside the big orchard of Apple family, whom specialized in… as their name suggests, apples. During constant work which needed to be done around here,  it was rare for anything uncommon to happen around this place. Still…this day wasn’t like others as a blinding flash of light showed up between the trees, one that would certainly draw attention of its owners.

As the world stopped spinning around him, the purple dragon landed heavily on the ground while trying very hard not to vomit… thankfully, his stomach was empty as a lot of time passed since he ate his last meal. When he slowly regained his senses, Spike groggily sat up, noticing soft green grass under his body and fresh air all around. He looked at his hand which instead of orb of light held big, red and tasty looking apple. Looking up at many leaves and apples above his head, the sight around him hit him with more memories.

“Sweet Apple Acres…” He muttered to himself, not believing his own green eyes.  He didn’t knew what happened or how… but he was home.  He was about to stand up and jump high in the air from joy, when suddenly a voice behind him out called angrily.

“Hey! Unless ya buin’ that apple then put it down!” Shouted defensively the mare in cowboy hat and three apples on her flank as the cutie mark. The action was so sudden that his spirit nearly jumped out of his body. Whirling around quickly he noticed somepony who he knew from long ago…

“A-applejack…?” He asked softly, his voice stuttering as tears started to form in his emerald eyes. To his notice, the mare before him was just as wide eyed as him, her voice not uttering any more words as she ran up to him and surprised him with hug with her forelegs putting all her might into it as salty tears streamed down her cheeks.

Overcoming his initial shock Spike did the only thing he could in this situation… and that was to hug the mare back, letting himself enjoying the closeness of familiar pony. As his claws wrapped firmly around her figure, he couldn’t help but take notice that somehow she didn’t seem as big as she was before… - Or am I…bigger? – Ran his thoughts as his heart started to beat faster than he thought possible… something definitely wasn’t right!