A Night to Remember

by Paradigm

Rating: teen
Tags: Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Other, Big Macintosh, Scootaloo, Adventure, Slice of Life, Human, Main 6
Length: 3552

After a night on the town, six friends wake up in a colourful land.

Waking up in a different bed is bad, but waking up in a different world is even worse!

After going out on a booze up, six friends end up in Equestria. How did they get there? Why? Watch them adapt to their new forms and with a new way of life.

Equestria will never be the same...

Published 2012-03-03 02:14:04 UTC
Last updated 2012-03-09 17:16:53 UTC

The Hangover

Prologue - The Day After...

How much did I drink last night? a man thought to himself as he lay on his stomach, eyes closed in a futile attempt to stop his world from spinning. Must have been a good one if I’m this hungover with a small smile creeping onto his lips, I think I’ll stay here on this soft, soft grass until the dizziness goes away…wait grass?.

With some effort he forced his eyes open and ignoring the sudden wave of nausea that hit him he looked down and noticed that he was laying on some grass, Ok...this is weird, I’ve never woken up in a forest before…well except that one time but it doesn’t really count since I was actually sober then. Looking around through blurry eyes he tried to see if he could recognise anything but this forest looked completely alien to him in his current state, “Well” he sighed “better get up and get out of this forest and look for the others”.

Closing his eyes as he tried to stand he noticed that his arms seemed heavier than usual and opened his eyes to find out the problem, “What the actual fuck!” he exclaimed when he saw two steely grey hooves instead of where his arms and hands were the night before. I’ve got to be dreaming he thought as he began to panic there is no-way I am a freaking pony. Seeing that there was a stream nearby he crawled as best he could and after dunking his head a few times to freshen up he inspected himself further and saw that the reflection was a indeed a pony; he was dark grey of hard worked metal and his tail, I have a tail!, was a deep blue colour like that of the night sky. “Aw man” he whined, “I get turned into a pony and I’m not a Pegasus or Unicorn…lame. Still I gotta get out of here, look for the others and find out what’s going on.”

Struggling to his feet and allowing the head rush to pass he took on tentative step forward and promptly returned to the ground. I can’t even walk! Stupid pony body…at least I know that this can’t be a dream otherwise I could walk…and my side wouldn’t hurt from that fall, pulling himself up he tried again trying to think how horses walk. His second attempt was more successful pulling off a small trot but had to stop because the movement didn’t agree with his weak stomach…or his headache.
The third attempted proved fruitful as he managed a slow, slightly unbalanced walk, ok I’ve got this walking thing down he thought to himself glad something went right today now if this is a forest and I’m in Equestria that means…this is the Everfree Forest...ah crap. Now aware of the possible dangers that could await he began to quickening his pace, despite losing some of his balance, and was constantly looking around for any predators that might be lurking for an easy meal.

Unfortunately by constantly turning his head from side to side he wasn’t paying much attention to the path in front of him which is why the appearance of a small yellow and pink Pegasus took him by such surprise. “Ahhh!” he screamed as he backed up onto his hind legs making the large stallion look even bigger, promptly made the small Pegasus do the same by jumping into the bushes to get away from the crazy grey stallion.

Calming down as another wave of nausea hit him he now looked to the quivering bush, “Woah sorry there” he said although his voice was still shaky due to the rush of fear that went through him, “my bad should’ve been looking where I was going”. Getting no response of the occupier of the bush he began to move on but suddenly had the air knocked out of his lungs and landed as a heap on the floor by some unknown force;

“Fluttershy are you ok?” asked a concerned, obviously female, voice

“Hey jerk where do you get off scaring my friend huh” said a second, more aggressive female voice coming from an very angry blue Pegasus with a bright multi-coloured mane.

“It’s ok Rainbow she’s fine look” the purple Unicorn said as she pointed to the yellow Pegasus covered in leaves and branches but she was completely ignored by their blue friend.

“Pick on someone your own size, just because Fluttershy’s the quietest pony in Ponyville doesn’t mean you people can pick on her and-“she ranted at the mass of unmoving grey pony.

While she was ranting at him Nick was actually trying to keep himself from being sick, considering now he was winded as well as having a terrible hangover this day just keeps getting better and better he thought bitterly. Struggling to his feet he looked at the new arrivals; the enraged Pegasus he already knew as Rainbow Dash ‘I know I spooked her friend but she doesn’t have to overreact like this’ wincing at the new pain in his chest, looking over to the Pegasus in question he noticed that she was being checked over by a purple Unicorn, Ah Twilight Sparkle, now there’s a pony I can deal with unaware of the smile on his face.

“What’s so funny huh? I’ll knock that smile right off your face!” As she began to make another charge at him she was enveloped by a purple glow pinning her to ground.

“Calm down Rainbow, we don’t know what happened and you knocked this poor pony down for no good reason”

“No reason!” she screamed as she looked at Twilight “You heard Fluttershy scream and-“

“Yes but I also heard a stallion scream as well, which you would have heard if you didn’t just fly off like you usually do” looking at her friend with a scornful look. “Not only that but you could’ve really hurt this pony”.

“Like I care, I am not saying sorry to him Twilight. I mean what if he was hurting Fluttershy then what huh”

Nick just looked at the two arguing mares and saw that the mare in question was looking at him, seeing that he noticed she squeak and closed in on herself and hid her face under her long bangs.

“So what Dash? See this is just like you; you rush into things without thinking, what if it had been timberwolves? Or a bear?”

“Then I would’ve beaten then too! No-one hurts Fluttershy while I around” Rainbow said puffing her chest in a display of pride.

Walking over to the yellow Pegasus while the other two were distracted he bent his head down, “Sorry if I scared ya, I’ve kinda lost my bearings and when you popped out of nowhere you scared me” he chuckled.

“Hey! Why are you talking to Fluttershy after what you did?”

“He’s probably apologising Rainbow calm down” the unicorn cried throwing her hooves in the air.

“It’s ok, I should’ve been paying more attention to where I was walking” Fluttershy mumbled quietly under her mane.

“Don’t apologise Fluttershy! Tell that jerk-“

“Rainbow, be quiet” Twilight shouted getting annoyed at her friend’s persistence in the matter.

“Nah it ain’t your fault, I kinda woke up in the forest and I’ve lost my friends” the stallion said with a grimace “and now I’ve got an overprotective Pegasus out of my blood” looking at the mare in question.
“Now that’s been settled” the unicorn began “Hello I’m Twilight Sparkle, this is Rainbow Dash” pointing her hoof at the blue Pegasus “and the pony you scared is Fluttershy, what’s your name?”

Oh crap Nick thought ‘I need a name; I can’t use Nick- what kind of pony is called Nick anyway.

“Man is this guy brain dead or what” Rainbow Dash said seeing that there was no response from the grey stallion.

Think, think Nick come on. Greymane? No my mane is blue. Blue Steel? Bah I’m not naming myself after that film. Panicking at looking like an idiot he thought harder; Umm, Umm…Cobalt? Yea that’ll do for now; it’s short, sweet and it sounds pretty cool too.

“The name’s Cobalt” he replied “Sorry that it took a bit I’m still pretty hungover and the pain in my side isn’t do much as well” giving Rainbow a mocking smile.

“Hello Cobalt, I’m guessing you’re not around here are you?”

“What gave it away?” he laughed, “I went out drinking with some buddies last night and the next thing I remember I wake up in the middle of this forest” he explained “mind helping me get to Ponyville to see if my friends are there?”

“Of course I wouldn’t leave a pony in need” quickly looking at Rainbow to silence any further protests, and getting no response from Fluttershy. “Follow us and you’ll be in Ponyville in no time”

“Sweet, thanks” he replied as he followed the three mares towards the exit of the forest, I really hope the others are here too, I don’t think I can deal with all of this…joy…by myself, especially if that pink mare tries to welcome me with one of her songs...

Further Introductions

Chapter 1- Further Introductions

Being coerced by Applebloom and her friends to explore the Everfree forest was not on the top of Applejack’s to do list for today; “But Sis” whined the small filly, her eyes glistening with unshed tears “we need t’ah see if we can get our adventurer cutie marks”. Unable to resist the combined cuteness of three fillies looking at her she agreed, Ah well she thought as she cast her gaze over her sister and her friends happily skipping along the path, at least Big Mac can cover the work for today.

Walking through the outskirts of the Forest she heard voices nearby as he went to investigate she told Applebloom “A’hm going to see what all the ruckus is about over there, you girls be careful now, and stay on the path” she warned “and I don’t want you going any deeper than Zecora’s house”.

“Ok sis, Cutie Mark Adventurers go!” the three fillies screamed as they ran off into the woods. Turning her attention back to the noise she moved a few bushes out of her way and was greeted with the site of two ponies; one Pegasus and one unicorn, running around shouting happily. What ruined the happy scene was a second Pegasus sitting on his noticeably bare flank, looking at his front hooves with a sad expression on his face, but she was unaware that the other Pegasi had noticed her appearance. Running up to her he gasped and stuck his front hoof out, causing him to wobble slightly “Hey Applejack!” he said enthusiastically “I’m Con-lamity, Calamity; My name’s Calamity. These are my friends Purple Haze and Summer Glow” pointing at the Pegasus and Unicorn respectively.

“Howdy y’all” she said as she shook the excited Pegasus’ hoof “If ya don’t mind me asking what’cha doing in Everfree this time of day? And how did ya know my name?”

The Unicorn mare quickly answered “We’re new in town and we sort of got lost” tilting her head in an expression of embarrassment, “Could you help us find our way back?”

“And of course we heard of Applejack of Sweet Apple Acres, which have the best apples in Equestria” Calamity added.

“Aw shucks that’s sweet of y’all to say” she said humbly “Sure I’ll take you into town, an Apple would never leave another pony in need…but is that Pegasus friend of yours ok?” she said pointing her hoof at the Pegasus who seem to be completely oblivious to her arrival.

“Ew-urple Haze is fine, he just has a massive hangover that’s all” Summer Glow said, her eyes briefly meeting with Calamity in understanding. “We went drinking last night to celebrate arriving here but he just drank a bit more than the rest of us”.
Looking over the Pegasus in question she saw that he was a rich purple colour with a pitch black mne but what she noticed was that despite being fully grown he lacked a cutie mark on this flank that’s ah grown Pegasus and he ain’t got his cutie mark? Weird, better not let Applebloom and her friends see this.

Looking over at the two other ponies she also noticed that the two other ponies didn’t have cutie marks either; the other Pegasus stallion was bright white and had a mane that was two different shade of blue huh she wondered ah wonder if he’s related to Colgate , no other pony’s got such a weird hair colour. But the mare that was now touching her horn was relatively normal looking; she was an auburn colour with light freckles similar to her own across her cheeks, but with a hot orange coloured mane. At least she sort of fits her name Applejack thought, bah no use in thinking about these ponies and where they came from ‘Ah gave my word and an Apple does not break her word.

Breaking out of her train of thought she saw the Calamity and Summer Glow were trying to move Purple Haze but he seemed like he was lost to the world. “Err, you alright there Sugarcube?” she asked beginning to feel slightly worried for the poor guy.

“Alright?” he whispered quietly, “I have no fingers...and I’m naked”

“What are these ‘fingers’ he’s talking about?” Applejack said turning to the other two ponies.

“Umm…Fingers…like Chocolate Fingers! Yea, he’s got a major sweet tooth and he’s just sad that he doesn’t have any” Summer Glow quickly answered “I doubt you ponies would have any round here”.

“Uh Huh” Applejack said now noticing that these ponies were acting really suspicious but thought nothing of it “You would get along fine with my friend Pinkie Pie, that pony eats more sugar than anything ah ever seen”.

“Girls!” she hollered “Applebloom where’d ya go?” looking around for the young yellow filly and her friends who had probably ignored her warning and got lost…again.

The shout must have scared some animal in the nearby tree because it began to rustle with activity. But it was actually Applebloom and the Cutie Mark Crusaders who were now dangling from the tree, only stopped from falling due to the vines they were now tangled in.

“Umm Sis…ah little help please” she said trying to twist herself out of the vines.

“Nice going Sweetie Belle” the small orange Pegasus “if you hadn’t been such a scaredy pony and got scared by Bloom’s sis we wouldn’t be in this mess”

“Oh it’s my fault” the little unicorn shouted “whose idea was it to climb up here anyway?”

“Well at least I can come up with ideas, unlike you”

Ignoring the two arguing fillies she turned to Summer Glow “Can ya use your magic to get those girls down please?”

“Umm I would love to bu-“ but she was interrupted by the sound of three small fillies hitting the ground that was a close one Summer Glow thought I don’t know even how to use this damn thing as she looked at here newly acquired horn.

“Come on let’s go get you girls patched up” Applejack sighed “You ponies are welcome to follow us back to Ponyville” Rarity’s going to love the fact Sweetie Belle’s dirty and ruined her mane…again.

Meanwhile…

“What the FUCK!” screamed a male voice.

“I know Louis” replied a different, much calmer voice.

“This is some messed up shit” Louis raged “I swear Taylor, one minute we’re all in the pub having a good time and then this.”

“Indeed it sucks Louis” Taylor said with a deadpanned expression on his equine face. “But it could be worse”

“Worse! How could it be worse?” he muttered darkly. I bet Conor and Nottage are loving this now
“Probably knowing those two they are” Taylor said trying to keep his voice steady “But it doesn’t solve the problem of what we’re going to do about it”.

“We should fuckin-”

“Such foul language!” wailed a new feminine voice.

Turning their heads towards the entrance of the clearing they had ending up in Louis and Taylor saw a white Unicorn with obviously designer gear on.

“Who the fuck are you?” Louis said before he could think of a more eloquent question. “And where the hell are we?”

“Oh my” the Unicorn gasped putting her hoof to her forehead dramatically “Such coarse language from such a pony isn’t-“ But she was aptly interrupted by a pink pony crashing into her mid-sentence.

“Oh hey Rarity! I found some super fantastic rocks around here and I bet they are jam-packed full of gems that you wanted! Hehe I like jam because it’s so tasty, especially strawberry jam it’s my favourite, it goes on-“

“Thank you Pinky Pie dear” Rarity said has she got up from the ground, dusting herself off, “But before you interrupted me there were these two ruffians that-“

“What” Pinkie gasped “New ponies?” Finally noticing the two new arrivals she quickly gave them a look over; one stallion was a light orange Unicorn with a dark green mane and was slightly rounder than most ponies she’s seen, must be because he spends all of his time in the library instead of partying like Twilight she wondered ignorant of the odds stares she was getting from the two newcomers. The Earth pony had a much milder colouration; a deep black coat with a creamy yellow mane but he had the distinguishing feature of having a white muzzle, looks like he’s got cake icing all around his mouth she giggled to herself what a messy pony!

“Louis is it me or is that pony crazy?” Taylor whispered to his friend hoping that the other two wouldn’t hear him and pointing at the pink mare with the messy mane.

“Mate we’re ponies…in a land where ponies can talk and humans don’t exist, I think everything is crazy at the moment”

“Look” Taylor began “We got off on the wrong han-of, wrong hoof. If you just tell us where we are, where the nearest town is and how to get there that would be super.”

“I won’t tell you anything until that vagrant apologises for his language” Rarity said as she flicked her mane.

“Apologise to the nice lady” Taylor said turning to Louis.

“I’m not saying sorry to a horse mate”

“Just say it so we can get out of this forest and find out what’s going on” he whsipered showing that his patience was wearing thin.

“Fine! I’m sorry” he said half heartedly

“Well that just doesn’t cut it” Rarity said as she turned to leave the scene.

“Wait Rarity we can’t just leave these poor ponies in the Forest just when they got here, that’s not how we behave in Ponyville” Pinkie Pie reasoned “

“Fine” she sniffed “But I’m not talking to them, especially that Earth pony with the foul mouth”
“I’ll show you a foul hoof you stuck up bitc- Ow! Why’d you kick me for?”

“Shut up Louis, don’t mess this up” Taylor mutter quietly “We need to get a town because maybe the others are there and we don’t know the way”

“Hey what’cha ponies talking about” laughed the pink pony as she hopped nearby “I’m Pinkie Pie, well my real name is Pinkamina, but every calls me Pinky because my name is so long and boring that nopony wants to keep saying it over and over and over and over. Say what are your names? Oh! Oh! I know…”

As the crazy pink pony began to list of a bunch of silly names, “I bet you’re called Éclaire! Nono, Sunny Smiles! Wait, I bet it’s Mandarin Mash”, the two friends looked at each other and wondered what cruel bout of karma brought this punishment onto them and how the others may be doing.

“And that is how I can drink huge amounts of alcohol without a hangover, because my body is just awesome like that” Cobalt said as he retold his tale.

“That’s interesting, I heard that the mass of a pony affects how their body deals with certain substances” Twilight said “I must read up on-“

“Hah that’s nothing” Rainbow Dash interrupted from above “I can drink barrels of Cider with even getting a little bit drunk”

“Are we talking Cider or actual alcoholic Cider? There’s a difference you know” he said looking up at the cocky Pegasus.

“Well, Duh of course I was talking about the harder stuff” smirking at Cobalt as she looked down form her position in the air.

“Well it doesn’t matter anyway since I could drink all of that and still be sober”

“Oh yeah? I can drink all of thank AND still perform the triple back-somersault from the Wonderbolts’ show” she boasted.

“Hah whatever, I bet you would throw up before even the first backflip” Cobalt said smirked at the overconfident Pegasus.

“Oh Yeah!” as she flew down to eye level, “I bet you can’t even-hey I just noticed where’s your cutie mark?”

“Oh hey girls, fancy meeting you here.” Twilight Sparkle as she stopped by the entrance of the town “who are those new ponies with you?”