The Haunted Mattress

by ZeppelinFan64

Rating: everyone
Tags: Twilight Sparkle, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Spike, Comedy
Length: 2326

Twilight gets a new mattress

After countless sleepless nights, Twilight decides that best decision is to get a new mattress.

Published 2013-10-13 13:00:02 UTC
Last updated 2013-10-13 13:00:02 UTC

Chapter I

It was another beautiful morning as the sun shone brightly over Ponyville. Spike awoke as he stretched his arms out and got out of his basket. He then started descending down the stairs and into the kitchen. But as he made his way there, he noticed Twilight's head slammed down on the table and she was mumbling incoherently.

"Uh Twi? Are you alright...?"

"Mmph..." Was all Twilight could muster out.

"I didn't quite catch that."

"I'm fine Spike, it's just that I'm really tired."

"Another sleep deprived night?"

"Yes. I think it's that old lumpy mattress. I'm going to have to get a new one when I go into town today."

"Ponyville has a mattress store?"

"I wouldn't be surprised if they did. I think I'm going to wait and wake myself up a little before I head out."

"Can I come?"

"No Spike, you stay here."

"Why?"

"Because I don't want you slacking off, this isn't really a day off Spike."

"Oh come on. I could help you pick out a really good one."

"Well, I guess so. But we can't stay too long, alright?"

"Alright."

Just then, there was a knock at the door.

"That's funny, who could it be this early?"

Twilight walked out of the kitchen to answer the door. But there was nopony around.

"That's strange. It must be Pinkie Pie going around pranking ponies again."

But there was indeed something there. Not a pony, but a rather odd looking mattress.

"Spike, get out here!" She called to him.

"What is it now Twilight?"

"Look at this. It's some kind of mattress."

"I wouldn't go near it Twilight." Spike said observing it. "We don't really know where it came from."

"Well it was obviously dumped here by some ignorant, but rather generous pony."

"Oh no Twilight. Do not tell me you are thinking of actually bringing that thing inside."

"Well I'm not just going to leave it here."

"That is a bad idea Twilight. What if it's haunted?"

"A haunted mattress?" Twilight asked sarcastically. "Spike, you've been reading to many science fiction comics."

"I have not. I just know suspicious paranormal activity when I see it."

"You're just being superstitious. There's no ghost in the mattress."

"We don't know that for sure Twilight. I think we should just leave it where it is."

"Nonsense, now help me carry it inside."

"I'm telling you Twilight, I really don't think we should-"

"Spike that's enough. Now help me carry it to my bed."

"*Sigh* Alright." Spike said quitting the argument.

As Spike got a hold of the end, he noticed that it started to glow a greenish color.

"Twilight!" He said from behind.

"What is it now?"

"This thing just glowed. I'm telling you it's evil!"

"Spike what did I just say?"

"But-"

"No more."

"Alright fine."

They began to lug the heavy mattress inside and up the stairs until eventually they made it to the bedroom.

"Well that was a bit of work, but at least we finally got it up here."

"It's not too late Twi, we can still get rid of it while we have the chance."

"Spike, I'm not going to get rid of a perfectly good mattress especially when we just dragged it all the way upstairs."

"Twilight this thing is possessed. I saw it glow! Why won't you believe me?"

"Because I don't live in a constant fantasy world. Now Spike, I believe you have chores to attend to downstairs."

"I'm not leaving you alone with that thing. I still don't trust it."

"Spike I've had just about enough of your attitude today. Now march downstairs."

"But Twilight-"

"I said march!"

"Fine. But don't come crying to me when your body becomes the new home for a demonic spirit." Spike said storming out of the room.

"Finally. Maybe now I can get some well deserved rest." Twilight said as she began to lie back.

"Ah, this feels nice."

Hehehehehe.

"What? What was that?"

Hahahahahaha!

"Spike is that you? Cut it out already with the spooky laughter."

Hello Twilight

"Who...Who said that?"

I Did

"Who did?"

Me, your mattress.

"But your an inanimate object. You can't talk."

Oh but I can. And I want to thank you personally for giving me a new home.

"Well you're welcome I guess. But how can you talk?"

It's not the mattress that can talk. But what's in the mattress that can.

"I don't understand."

You will. Hehehehehe.

The mattress started to glow a ghostly greenish color again as Twilight realized that Spike was telling the truth.

"Oh Celestia, this thing really is haunted! Spike! Spike help!" She tried to call but it didn't work. Slowly the mattress started to control the whole room. Levitating things, making things break, knocking stuff over, etc.

"What is it you want?"

Your body.

"What?!"

Your body will make an excellent new home. I can tell you and I will get along just fine.

"No way! I'm not going to let you possess my body."

You don't really have a choice.

"Of course I do. Why wouldn't I-"

Before Twilight could finish, she started to notice that she herself started glowing.

"Hey, what are you doing?"

Transferring my spirit in your body. Soon I will control everything.

"No! Stop! Spiiiiiiiike!"

Downstairs, Spike was sweeping the floor, still agitated at Twilight's stubbornness.

"The nerve of it all. I try to protect her and all she does is call my warnings 'superstition.' I wouldn't be surprised if she was being possessed right now. Maybe then she'd believe me."

Spike was interrupted by a strange moaning from upstairs.

OOOOOOOHHHHH.

"What was that?"

OOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHH.

"Oh very funny Twilight. Ha ha! Make fun of me why don't you?"

The moaning continued.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHH.

"This isn't funny Twilight. Knock it off."

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH.

"Twilight? Are you alright."

The moaning still continued as Spike grew worried.

"Oh man, I hope she's ok."

Spike went up the stairs into the bedroom to check on his friend.

"Twilight? Are you alri-What in the hay?!"

Spike saw Twilight laying on the mattress but had the green glow covering her body as an evil aura lured around her.

"Twilight? Is that you?"

"Hello Spike." Said a different voice in Twilight's body.

"Hey! You're not Twilight!"

"Brilliant observation Sherlock."

"What have you done with my friend?"

"Oh, don't worry about her. She's with me now."

"Spike help me!" Twilight's voice managed to slip out.

"Oops, little bit of a slip there."

"You won't get away with this, I'll get you out of her somehow."

"Try it little man. HAHAHAHAHAHA!" The spirit laughed as it levitated Spike in the air.

"Hey, what's going on-WAAAAHH!" Spike screamed being hurled out of the room and falling down the stairs.

"Oh man this is bad!" Spike said getting up. "I've got to do something, but what?"

Spike started to look at the shelves and got an idea.

"Maybe I can find a book on exorcisms." He said jumping from book to book.

Time had elapsed, and Spike went through just about every single book in the library and couldn't find the information he needed.

"I can't believe this. All these books and nothing about exorcisms?"

Spike stopped his search as he heard a knock at the door and went to see who it was.

"Hello?"

"Hi Spike." Pinkie Pie said. "I was wondering if Twilight had any recipe books I could borrow for some sweets I want to try and make."

"This isn't really a good time right now Pinkie. Twilight's a little...Under the weather."

"Twilight's sick? Then as her friend I must go to her aid this second."

"I can't let you do that Pinkie. I mean you don't want to get sick do you?"

"I'm not worried. Where is she?"

"She's in the bedroom, but I can't let you go up there."

"What's the problem Spike. It's not like she's been demonically possessed by some weird ghost that refuses to give her body back, right?"

Spike said nothing. He just stood there with his jaw wide open at how exact Pinkie was on the situation.

"You mean there really is a ghost that possessed Twilight?"

"Yes, that's why I didn't want you to go up there."

"Have you tried an exorcism?"

"I tried to look up exorcisms in these books, but I couldn't find anything."

"Well then I guess we'll just have to do this the old fashioned way."

"Old fashioned way?"

"My great grandfather used to perform exorcisms, and he had a specific way that would keep the ghosts away for sure."

"Awesome! So how do we do it?"

"Well, it can only be done by somepony she's the closest to."

Spike then caught the idea.

"Oh buck no. I'm not going back up there. That thing already threw me down the stairs. I don't want to know what else it has in mind."

"But Spike, if you don't do it then the ghost will continue to take over Twilight's body and we may never see her again."

Spike gave in. "Alright, how does this work?"

"Well you have to wear the proper garments."

"Garments?"

"Like these." Pinkie said grabbing a nightgown and sleeping cap.

"No way. I'm not doing an exorcism dressed like an old lady."

"Come on Spike, do it for Twilight."

"Ugh! Fine." Spike groaned as he put them on. "What's next?"

"Next, you have to say a special chant to ward off the evil spirit."

"Chant? What chant?"

"Hang on." Pinkie grabbed a scroll and quill and proceeded to write. "Here." She said handing to Spike who began to read it.

"Hullabaloo and howdy doo. Musty prawns and Timbuktu. Yeltsy-by and hibbety-poo. Kick 'em in the dishpan hoo hoo hoo."

Spike looked away in confusion. "Kick 'em in the dishpan hoo hoo hoo?"

"Alright Spike, I think you're ready."

Spike gulped with fear.

Back inside the bedroom, the demon inside Twilight was still causing all sorts of mayhem around. The door creaked open as Spike entered.

"You again?" The demon asked. "I thought I told you to scram."

"I'm going to get rid of you, you stupid ghost!"

"Hahahaha! Oh don't make me laugh pipsqueak."

"I mean it! I will stop you."

The demon wiped a tear from it's eye from laughing. "Oh yeah? And what are you gonna do shorty?" He continued to laugh.

Spike grew red with anger, he couldn't take any more of the ghost's wisecracks and began to cite the special chant.

"Hulabaloo and howdy doo!"

The ghost stopped laughing. "What are you doing kid?"

"Musty prawns and Timbuktu!"

"Seriously, I don't get it."

"Yeltsy-by and hibbety-poo."

"Are you just making these up as you go along or something?"

"Kick 'em in the dishpan hoo hoo hoo!"

Spike waited for dramatic pause hoping the chant worked. But the ghost was still there.

"And what pray tell, was that?" The demon asked.

"That was supposed to get rid of you."

"Didn't quite work, did it?"

"I guess not."

"Well then, you know what this means?"

"Oh not again."

The door slammed open as Spike, once again, was thrown down the stairs.

"Did it work? Did you ward off the ghost?"

"No. This stupid exorcism didn't do anything. That thing is still inside Twilight."

"Well, I didn't want to resort to this, but I have no choice."

"What are you talking about Pinkie?"

"I'm going to have to call the professionals."

"Who you gonna call?"

"Gho-"

Before Pinkie could finish, a loud noise started to come from upstairs.

"Oh no, that can't be good." Spike said.

"Come on Spike, Twilight might be in more trouble."

"Forget it. I'm not going back up there."

"Spike!" Twilight's voice screamed.

"That's Twilight's voice! Let's go Pinkie."

The two dashed upstairs and busted the bedroom door down.

"Twilight? Are you in there?" Spike asked.

"Spike please help!" Twilight's voice was trying to come through. "Quiet you!" The demon voice demanded.

"Don't worry Twilight, I'll think of something. Pinkie help me think of something."

"I don't know what else I can do."

"Well we have to try."

"Hmmm. I know, maybe we can bore the ghost out of Twilight."

"Bore a ghost? Pinkie I don't think it's actually possible to-" Spike paused. "Actually, that's a great idea! Hang on, I've got just the thing." Spike went over to his basket and pulled out a book. "Whenever I go to sleep, I always read this book."

"'The Complete Works of Shakesmare?' Let me see." Pinkie began to read. "To die, to sleep. To sleep, perchance to dream. Ay, there's the rub."

"AUGH! Stop it!" The demon said. "I'll give her body back just stop with the fancy words. You're boring me."

The green glow started to fade back into the mattress as Twilight started to come back to herself.

"Twilight? Is that really you this time?" Spike asked.

"Yes Spike, it's really me."

"Oh thank goodness. I thought we'd never get rid of that guy."

"So what do we do now?" Pinkie asked.

"The first think I'm going to do is get rid of this mattress."

"Good call. I'll help you take it down." Spike said.

"I'll help too." Pinkie said grabbing one side of the end.

The three of them pushed the mattress down the stairs and outside the door.

"I hope that now you'll start listening to me more Twilight."

"I'm sorry Spike. You were right all along. I guess I was just so tired I couldn't really see the reason."

"Well, now that that's over, how about we go over to Sugarcube Corner and forget about this whole mess?" Pinkie suggested.

"Sounds good to me, how about you Spike?"

"Absolutely."

Twilight, Spike, and Pinkie went on their way and and left the mattress behind outside the library in the open to which somepony else eventually found it.

"I wonder if Twilight is around. I could really-Well hello, what a divine mattress." Rarity said.

The End?