Soul Fire

She would visit the meadow many more times in that week. In that time, she hadn’t heard a word from the Captain. It was snowing again that night. Amber had awoken early in the night to see the glow of the sun disappear from the sky. To be blunt, she was restless and had awoken early after only having a few hours of sleep. She had decided to bring some of the wildflowers that she had picked from the meadow with her to visit the Princess, who was always glad to see her.

“Why Amber, what a pleasant surprise. Though you must forgive me, I have been busy as of late,” proclaimed Princess Luna as Amber walked into the New Lunar Republic Palace Library.

“I’m sorry to have interrupted you, my Princess. I just thought to stop by and give you these,” Amber said, holding the meager flowers for the Princess, thinking about how they didn’t compare to the others decorating the Palace rooms and halls.

“Why thank you Amber. They’re lovely. I will have them placed in my private study.”

“I know that they are not so grand...”, she began to say when the Princess gave her a look that said are-you-really-that-silly-for-even-thinking-that.

“They’re lovely Amber, because they were given to me by you. Never think that something is worthless just because it’s humble and quaint,” the Princess said, as she turned back to her book.

“If I may ask, my Princess, what are you reading?”

“Come and see for yourself, after all, it is about you,” said the Princess, as she stepped back to invite Amber to read.

“That couldn’t be,” Amber exclaimed, as she stepped forward to read the passage.

When a protector sacrifices all,

A necessary monster will live,

One of anger and love,

Only when acceptance follows fear,

Will the blood no longer taint,

Nor give strength against thine’s will.

When a healer sacrifices all,

A great change will occur,

One of great sadness and fear,

Or one of acceptance and growth,

Blood given or taken can heal wounds,

Though only a pure soul can heal scars

“I don’t understand,” said Amber, looking up to the Princess after reading the passage.

“You don’t have to. The answers will be revealed in time, but I urge you to take great caution in the road ahead and trust in yourself,” told the Princess, as she placed a hoof on Amber’s shoulder. Amber looked down and didn’t say a word as she stayed in deep thought, wonder, and worry.

Midnight struck the night sky as the moon reached her zenith and lit up the top of every building, tree and reflective face of snow in the valley that within lay Ponyville. Along the newly snow covered streets walked Amber. She decided to go and visit Derpy to see how she was doing. To be honest, the Princess suggested it. Though Amber had thought of doing so, she originally had decided not to because she didn’t want to crowd a pony who she didn’t even know, even if she had saved her and she would like to know how they were doing.

Amber walked up to the door of the Post Office and lifted up a hoof to knock, only for the door to open, showing Freefall and the gray Pegasus, Derpy, that she had helped save nearly three weeks ago.

“Amber?” exclaimed Freefall. “What are you doing here? Oh my Luna, can we get you anything? Derpy, we have a guest. Would you mind if we catch the next showing and stop to invite Amber... Remember the pony who saved you? Lets invite her in for a muffin and some tea or milk?”

“Yes, yes, of course. Who’s here?” asked Derpy as she trotted down the hallway to where Amber and Freefall were.

“Oh my goodness. Oh my goodness. Yay!” exclaimed Derpy as she ran towards Amber and tripped on her own feet. “Ouch. Amber’s here! Amber’s here!”

“Are you ok, Derpy?” Amber asked with a bemused look on her face as she watched the grey Pegasus get back up, only for her to bounce up and down and then abruptly give her a big hug, which Amber couldn’t help but smile at.

“We’ve all been so worried. Are you ok? Are all you boo boos gone?” asked Derpy as she looked up and then pulled open Amber’s wing and then leg to inspect them with a magnifying glass. Amber giggled and smiled, looking towards a very amused Freefall, who could barely control his laughter as he closed the door.

“Oh no! You are still hurt,” said Derpy, as she stopped to look at the healing wound on her neck. Derpy looked up with sadness and worry, as Freefall became serious, and looked to Amber.

“That one is new and not from that battle. Where did you get it?” asked Freefall.

“It’s okay. It doesn’t hurt, and it’s healing on it’s own time. Some of my friends have been helping me with it,” Amber said, moving to cover the wound as she looked down at Derpy.

“You’re avoiding the question, Amber. Where did you get it?” asked Freefall more firmly.

Amber looked up and sighed, “I got it from an obake who bit me here in Ponyville in the last attack.” Freefall groaned and shook his head.

“Ooo. Ooo. Who has been helping you make it better? The Princess?” Asked Derpy.

“My, you’re just full of questions today, Derpy, but I think it’s best that we all sit down in the kitchen and relax as you make us some of your famous carrot muffins and tea,” said Freefall, as he smiled at Derpy, who was still clung to Amber.

“Yay!” she said as she ran down the hallway and tripped in the same spot again. “Oops. My bad.”

Amber and Freefall chuckled under their breath, trying to keep quiet. She could see why, if anyone could… how this little filly could melt the Captain. She was absolutely pure joy.

“Amber, you were bedridden during the battle. Where did you really get that?” asked Freefall sternly.

“I got out of my bed and made it to the battle to do what I could,” she looked down and began walking down the hall to the kitchen that Derpy had disappeared into.

“You can’t be serious,” exclaimed Freefall as he grabbed Amber’s shoulder and pulled her back to his frightened, almost angry face. “You actually got out of bed…! You could have been killed in your condition just with the flight over!”

“I couldn’t just do nothing! I can’t sit back and watch things happen. I have to try and keep trying. If I can make even the smallest difference, I will try even if I fail. I will try with all that I have. I won’t stop,” said Amber as she turned away to begin walking again, only to be pulled into a big hug.

“You drive us all crazy, Amber. I mean for Luna’s sake, we all care for you. It hurts us to see you put yourself through hell. It’s no wonder the Captain is practically going mad.”

“What do you mean?” asked Amber, pulling out of the hug.

Freefall began walking to the kitchen and sighed, “I know that you see it in him too. He’s changing. He’s closing himself off, which is not making anything better. He’s so scared that he’ll hurt somepony.”

“I know that he cares, but he doesn’t show it and that makes me wonder and worry.”

“Are you kidding me,” exclaimed Freefall. “He likes you. You might have not seen it or have misidentified it, but he cares for you a lot. That’s why he separates himself from you.” She dropped her head and sighed.

Freefall placed a gentle hoof on her shoulder and said, “He may shut you out mentally, but he can’t do that emotionally. To be blunt, I don’t think anyone could with the fiery warm heart that you have.”

He patted her shoulder and trotted off into the kitchen. Amber walked into the kitchen in deep thought as Derpy placed the warm fresh muffins onto the table and Freefall gathered the hot steaming pot of lemon grass tea.

“Oooo. Oooo. Please come sit beside me, Amber,” smiled Derpy. Amber couldn’t help but smile in return. After enjoying a few cups of tea and the laughter of what she thought was the beginning of a really great new friendship, Amber had left the Post Office and begun a calm walk through Ponyville before she decided to take off.

Amber walked along and between the many buildings and boutiques, just simply enjoying the cold winter night air. Funny, she never liked the cold, but for some reason, she felt calmed by it and not cold at all. The chill nearly gave her a headache, but she still felt like the cold had calmed the over heated and overworked flame that was herself. She stopped to look around her, seeing all of the dark windows and closed doors during the night. It was a shame that more ponies didn’t enjoy the night. Though she could see all of the snow and buildings before her, Amber, through the sight of her mind, felt like she was in a land without time as she remembered all of the good and bad in her life. She was surprised that she smiled at some of the smallest things when the bigger things and accomplishments that she had seemed to be huge, but at the same time seemed trivial. She should be proud of them, but she wasn’t and she didn’t understand that or why she felt this way. Did she feel that she couldn’t own up to something? It just seemed that no matter what she did, that any accomplishment she made just wouldn’t give her any worth. There were so many other ponies out there that had done so much more than her, that had made a greater difference. She guessed it was the latter reason.

With a numb disconnected look, she sadly smiled. She shouldn’t compare herself to others, but for some reason she celebrated her achievements for milliseconds of what she should. She felt that her achievements weren’t that grand, that that there was always some other pony out there who was better then you, but also one that was always worse off than you. The cold facts had some truth behind them and that made her feel that she had a very trivial existence.

Good Luna, she was already falling back into that cycle. She looked up to realize that she had been walking without paying attention. She decided to walk back the other way, when she realized that somepony was behind her. It was the Captain. He hesitated when she noticed him but then started to walk towards her with a serious somber face. She became scared of what he was going to say in that moment.