Clover Clues and the Shattered Salon

Chapters

Case 1: A Ton of Bricks
Case 2: The Fragile Facades
Case 3: The Maker's Mark
Case 4: Meet the Satins
Case 5: Mandatory Paperwork
Case 6: The Momma's Boy
Case 7: Of Borscht and Bovines
Case 8: The Haute Hooficure

Case 1: A Ton of Bricks

Case 1: A Ton of Bricks

It was a hot day in the City. The local fillies and colts were currently holding a sidewalk egg-frying contest. It was hard to tell who was winning, but it was probably the sidewalk.

That's when she walked into the office. She was a cream-colored pegasus who carried herself in such a way that I knew nopony had ever told her "No" her entire life. She sported a sewing kit cutiemark and a rotten look on her face.

"You there, are you Officer Clues?"

"No."

"It...it says so on your desk!"

I looked down at my newly outdated desk placard. "Oh right. That. I'm Clues, but that's Detective Clues now." She looked like couldn't care less about that.

"Well I couldn't care less about that. My name is--"

"Sheer Satin, I know. I've seen your billboards. You model for your family's boutiques, right?"

"They are salons...but yes, I model and design some of the pieces, but that's not why I'm here today. Shall I tell you, or do you already know that as well?" She leveled a keen gaze at me.

I threw up my hooves. "No, Ms. Satin, I don't, and I meant no disrespect. Let's blame it on the heat. What's the matter?"

Her gaze intensified. "Bricks."

"Bricks?"

"Yes. One through every window in every one of Papa's salons."

I got out my quill and pad. "Who first discovered the crime?"

"I did. I like to make an early morning fly-by to each of our Maretropolitan locations. To see if...any of the storefronts need cleaning..." Satin was on the verge of tears.

I adopted my best sympathetic look, which my MPD colleagues rate as a solid 'at least he's trying'.

"Don't you worry, Ms. Satin. We'll figure out who did this, and see that you receive full comp--"

"No, Detective. We will not be seeking monetary compensation."

"But Miss--"

"I want to see them punished. Punished for the damage they did to the Satin name."

I could see that her mind was made up. "Very well Ms. Satin. Of course there are some necessary--"

"--procedures which must be followed, of course Detective Clues." A smartly dressed unicorn with straight black hair seemed to materialize behind Satin. "I'm the Satins' legal counsel."

"YesI'msureyouare," I said quickly, before I could get interrupted again. "So you know the drill. Ms. Satin, I would like a personal tour of the Satin Salons."

Case 2: The Fragile Facades

Case 2: The Fragile Facades

Sheer Satin gestured with her wing at her family's ruined storefront. "Well, this is our place. My father's first salon."

The beautiful monument to fashion and fabulousness that was the Satin Salon was completely destroyed with a single well-aimed throw. The large shop window, which usually displayed the most up-to-date fashions for the most discerning mares and stallions, was covered with black plastic and duct tape.

"Okay, let's take a closer look. Sergeant Cake? Please cordon off the crime scene."

"Aye aye, Detective Lucky!" The reliable earth pony Sgt. Paddy Cake saluted and got to work.

"And as always, my name is Detective Clues. Clover Clues. Not...Lucky Find. What kind of cartoony name is that?"

"Sir! It just fits! Sir!"

"And stop that Cake! This isn't the Guard."

To that, the sergeant simply saluted again and returned to his task. I turned to Satin.

"I'll have to remove this covering. Has anything inside the store been cleaned up or moved around in any way?"

Satin shook her head. "No. Mother wanted things cleaned up right away, but I'm holding her off until you finish your investigation."

"Good, wise move. I'll get to work. You don't have to stay for this..."

Satin shrugged and said, "I don't need to be anywhere. I was supposed to work here today. Also, I'm a little curious to see a detective at work."

I grinned and nodded. "You're free to watch, I just need to concentrate."

I closed my eyes and took a few deep breaths, focusing on my horn. It began to glow bright green. I drew a magnifying glass from my MPD-issue saddlebag.

In a low murmur I said, "Sight beyond sight, sound beyond sound, help me find that which cannot be found."

I then opened my eyes, which now exuded a soft green light from the irises. I held my magnifying glass at the ready and began to process the crime scene.

"...what was that?" said Satin. She found she couldn't look away from the brightly glowing green eyes.

"Oh, the spell? My mom taught it to me. It helps me notice details that I would otherwise overlook. All MPD unicorns have to learn some sort of focusing spell."

As I talked, I scanned the pattern of shattered glass strewn all over the interior of the shop. All the outfits on display at the time were covered with sharp shards. I tried to estimate what the total losses might be, but gave up when that train of thought got me nowhere.

"Based on the pattern of the broken glass, I would say a heavy object was thrown near the base of the window. The same goes for the window in the door. And you said all of the salons are like this?"

Satin silently nodded, a dark look crossing her delicate features.

"We'll find the ones who did this, Ms. Satin. Now let's take a look at those bricks."

Satin fidgeted, an oddly awkward gesture for such a graceful pegasus. "Th-that's fine...I think I should leave, Detective. I trust you'll be able to find the bricks."

I nodded and watched her take off from a gallop into flight. Sergeant Cake approached after cordoning off the area and placating the local gawkers. "What did you do to that nice lady?"

"Nothing, Cake! She just got flustered and left after I mentioned the bricks."

He shrugged his muscular shoulders. "I guess she has every right to be out for sorts. It's not every day somepony sabotages your family business."

Case 3: The Maker's Mark

Case 3: The Maker’s Mark

Eight bricks were lined up in rows of two on my desk. Each pair was labeled with a different street address. On the bulletin board was a map of Maretropolis, on which four pins were stuck, with yarn connecting them all.

I looked at the bricks as if they were trying to whisper their secrets to me, then up at the bulletin board.

A gruff looking pegasus passed my desk. "Good visualization, Luck. I'd like to see your reports if you're finished with them."

"Sure thing Chief." I magicked a file folder to him. Even though I had made detective, I was still very much in training. Chief Swiftwing could also weigh in on the evidence and see something I didn't.

He opened the file and hmm'd over it for a while. I went back to considering the bricks using my focusing spell. The bricks were a City standard size and make, with no apparent marks. I made a mental note to have our forensics team have a look at them.

Swiftwing closed then file with a snap and slapped it on my desk. "Decent, Luck. Decent."

That was as big a compliment as I was ever going to get out of him. I nodded seriously, while performing a happy little dance in my head. "Thanks Chief. Anything jump out at you?"

He grimaced. It was an expression that could quell any manner of bad behavior. I instinctively tensed up, despite just being complimented. "Only that somepony has to really have it out for the Satins. The attacks had to have happened nearly simultaneously, based on Sheer Satin's testimony."

I nodded quickly. "I thought so too. After taking these bricks to the lab, I should interview the family."

"Very good. Keep me informed."

"You got it, Chief!"

I tried to magick up all the bricks and felt a sharp twinge of pain between my eyes. Okay, note to self: do not pick up eight bricks at once with magic. I then loaded them two at a time into a little cart I found to tote them to our crime lab.

The pride and joy of the precinct, the MPD crime lab was on the cusp of forensic technology. All the latest magi-mechanical and analog equipment could be found there; they even had some devices exclusive to the lab, designed by some of the brightest CSI's in Equestria.

"Hey Lucky," said Laser Focus. She was wearing her usual white lab coat over her dark red fur. Her horn glowed bright red as she was manipulating a microscope.

"Got some evidence for you."

She looked up from her microscope and into my cart. "...bricks?"

"Bricks. I've got to find their makers, or really anything you can tell me about them. I'm not getting anywhere."

Laser smiled brightly. "We'll take a look. I think our forensic architect is in today."

I didn't know we had a forensic architect, or what forensic architect even does. But I'm glad we had one. "Thanks Lase. Let me know if you find anything. Have fun!"

She gave me a coquettish wink. "You know I always do!" She magicked all the bricks over to a shiny metal table without any apparent strain. Ouch, my pride. I left the station and called a taxi to take me to the Satin residence.

Case 4: Meet the Satins

Case 4: Meet the Satins

Burlington Satin was an unexpectedly imposing pegasus. His suit jacket was simple, but impeccably tailored. He was one of the tallest ponies I have ever seen, and I've seen a lot of ponies in my line of work.

The Satin family estate wasn't what I was expecting. For one, it wasn't an estate. It was the penthouse suite in an exceedingly fancy high rise. We sat in large pillow-lined chairs on the building's roof, magically shielded from the high winds.

"..and that's how to properly perform a Fancy hooficure," he concluded.

My lips clumsily searched for the straw in my glass of peach tea as I let him talk. I found that asking about a pony's profession is an easy way to break the ice. "Well, thank you for taking me through all that, Mr. Satin, I...actually think you've won me over. I might go get one when I have a chance. Now. Back to this morning's incident." I withdrew my notebook from my saddlebag and magicked a pen to the ready.

For a brief moment, Mr. Satin fidgeted like an awkward colt, but he quickly regained composure. "I don't know what to tell you, Detective. Sheerie flew in through an open window, screaming that there had been a break-in. Break-ins. All my shops..."

"We will find who did this, Mr. Satin."

"I don't much care who. I want to know why. I loved those windows. My sister hand-lettered each one. 'The Satin Salon' in bold, elegant script. Now they're gone. All gone. Why would someone do this?"

I put a comforting hoof on his shoulder. "That's what I'm here to find out. Now I need to ask this, but do you know of anypony who would wish you or your business harm?"

Mr. Satin gazed out over the city, lazily tracing the skyline with a wingtip. "Apart from a few, and I do mean very few, dissatisfied customers, I cannot think of anypony."

I nodded and set down the tea on a small glass coffee table. "Well, thank you sir. That's all for now. I'd like to get your wife's side of the story as well. Do you know where she is?"

Burlington scratched his chin with a hoof. "Knowing her, she's probably in our Manehattan location, trying to shoo away police so she can start cleaning up."

I stood up quickly. "Ah, I'd better be on my way then. Thanks for the tea!"

~~~

I found Mrs. Downy Satin in a very heated discussion with a long suffereing beat cop. "Now you listen here," she seethed. "This is my property, and I demand you let me through!"

"I--I'm sorry Mrs. Satin, I can't let anypony through until...oh hey Lucky! Here, Detective Clues is the lead investigator on your case. You can talk to him." The uniformed officer quickly made his escape from the small but imposing pegasus.

I gave the officer an 'oh gee thanks' look, and turned to the Lady Satin. She seemed to be the opposite of her long, lean husband. Downy was small and curvy, and very much embodied her name. But this outward softness belied a sharp tongue and a shrewd intellect, which was responsible for the financial success of her husband's salon franchise. She glared at me with the fury of Celestia's rising sun. I'm ashamed to admit that I quailed under her fiery gaze, even though she had to look up to stare those daggers at me.

"Well, detective? My storefront is in shambles. Are you going to let me inside so I can start fixing it, or do you have something more important to do?"

"Ah, well ma'am, I...yes. Come with me." I figured I could conduct my interview while investigating the scene, while keeping her from assaulting an officer of the law. "I'd like to inspect the windows. Then I'll be happy to help with the cleanup."

"Now you...oh. Alright." She seemed surprised at my offer.

I smiled at her. "I want to see this place back up and running as soon as possible, ma'am. Now, has anything been moved or cleaned up already?"

"No...they wouldn't let me," she said softly. She seemed to be calming down.

"Just give me one moment, and we can start making this right." I closed my eyes, let my horn glow, and recited my cantrip. "Sight beyond sight, sound beyond sound, help me find that which cannot be found."

I opened my glowing eyes and faced the broken window, looking carefully at the pattern of shards on the floor. The bricks had made contact at a low point in the windows, allowing most of the glass to fall straight down. They seemed to be thrown in just the right place to completely destroy the large panes. "It almost looks mechanically done," I murmured to myself. "It's exactly the same as the other shops." I blinked a few times, and the glow faded.

"You could tell all that just by looking?" said Mrs. Satin skeptically.

I nodded confidently. "Yes ma'am. And with the information I've gathered here, and the evidence being analyized by our experts at the station, we're getting closer to catching the vandals."

That seemed to satisfy her for the moment. "Good. Now help me clean up. This place looks deplorable."

I smiled obligingly. "With pleasure, ma'am."

Case 5: Mandatory Paperwork

Case 5: Mandatory Paperwork

It was late afternoon. I was compiling the information I had gathered into a report for the Chief, when a hoof tapped my shoulder. It was Laser Focus, and she was holding a sheaf of papers in her teeth. "Mmffgh rpfts fffyh." She spat the papers onto my desk. "I've got some results for you."

"Oh? You didn't have to hoof-deliver them."

She grinned. "What, I can't come visit my favorite rookie detective?"

"Yeah, yeah. So what did you find?"

Laser put on her professional face and magicked open the report. "Well, the bricks are nothing special. Standard make, local ingredients. You can buy them from any number of places."

Great. There was one busted lead. "Oh well, thanks anyw--"

"Hold your horses, I'm not finished! We found some hoof particulates on some of the bricks."

"So what does that tell us? That somepony threw them?" I didn't see the value in that; of course they were thrown.

Laser bit her lip excitedly. "Nope. Not somepony. Some bovine."

"Bovine?" I was at a loss.

"You know, a cow or a bull. The bricks were handled by several different bovines."

I furrowed my brow. "Oh...so what does that mean?"

"I'm not sure," she said thoughtfully. "You're the detective not me. But I have a bad feeling about this, Clover. Cows and ponies are not well known for getting along. Be careful, okay?"

I smiled and nodded. "Sure thing, Lase. I mean, you've got my back, right?"

"I'm serious, Detective. This is your first case lead. Don't get in over your head; you know you always have backup."

I wiped the smirk off my face and nodded again. "Yes ma'am."

Laser seemed satisfied with my response. She gathered her papers and left me to my work. "Good luck, Detective."

~~~

It was nearly midnight. My desk was covered with notes, and my bulletin board resembled a spider's web. I had looked at my collection of evidence from every possible angle, drawing every possible link, and I wasn't getting anywhere. How did cows enter into all of this? Why beauty salons? I groaned and laid my head flat on my desk.

Suddenly my ears pricked up. Backup! I always have backup. If I was ever in a bind, there was always one pony I could turn to for help. But I had to be properly desperate to ask her help on a case, especially my first as lead. But I was properly desperate. The Satins were counting on me!

Tomorrow, I would talk to my mother.

Author's Note

If you're reading this, I love you and I thank you. I promise I'm actually going somewhere with this. I have an ending and everything! Please bear with me.

Case 6: The Momma's Boy

Case 6: The Momma's Boy

Ringing the doorbell of my mother's apartment, I felt like I was cheating on my case. Even in semi-retirement, Verity Clues was one of the best private investigators in the City. If anypony could crack this wide open, it was her. Mom magicked open the door holding two mugs of coffee. She floated one over to me.

I accepted it and took a sip. Cream and sugar with nutmeg, just how I liked it. I gave her a questioning look. "Um, thanks. Were you expecting me?" .

"Well, I wouldn't be a good mother if I wasn't keeping tabs on you," she said with a knowing smile.

"Wait, you've got a tail on me? Mom!"

"She is very discreet!" implored Verity.

"Ugh...anyway, I have a case I'd like you to look at. May I come in?"

She stepped aside and let me into her apartment, formerly hers and mine. It was a cozy enough place, but I had grown to love my own loft, located within an easy walk from the station. It had been years since I'd moved out; it was around the same time I decided to join the Force.

I walked into the kitchen and set my saddlebag on the table. I started pulling out my case files when she stopped me. "Steady on, Detective. First let me see your initial report, and any results from the lab."

I put away the large binder full of notes and pulled out a single manila folder. She opened it and read silently. After a few minutes, she drained her mug and turned to me, grinning like a fox in a henhouse. "Now I'm sure you've done some top-notch analysis, Clover, but it helps to get another set of eyes on the hard facts of the case. I think I've got a new lead for you."

I mirrored her vulpine expression. "Oh yeah? What are you seeing?"

She got up to refill her coffee as she talked. "Well, we know for sure the windows were broken at about the same time yesterday morning. And you observed that it was effectively done."

"Right. Somepony knew where to throw those bricks to completely destroy those windows."

"And you found that at some point, these bricks were handled by cattle." The grin hadn't left her face.

My expression darkened. "Yeah, that really threw me for a loop. That's where I was stuck before coming to you."

"Well...it was an organized attack, most likely perpetrated by cows. What sort of cattle organization would do this?"

"Wait...ah, how did I not see this before?"

She smiled proudly. "You were looking too closely; you needed to take a step back. But now we're on the same page. I think you'll find your vandals in the ranks of the Kosa Kostroma."

The thought sent me reeling. "The Moofiya? You think the Satins got on the bad side of the cattle mob?"

She nodded firmly. "I do. I think they didn't keep up their payments on their salons, and the Kosa sent them a collection notice in the form of eight bricks. And I'll bet the Satins aren't the only ones they're extorting. But you'll need to do some more digging to confirm it."

I nodded quickly. "Sure thing. I'll contact Organized Crime, and we can--"

"Whoah, not so fast! This is still a hunch; you'll need to be more subtle. I have a few contacts you can talk to." Verity magicked up a quill and wrote down some names and an address.

I picked it up and put it with the rest of the papers in my bag. I then gave my mother a hug. "Thanks, Mom. This is just the break I needed."

She smiled brightly and returned the embrace. "You're welcome. You'll be getting a bill in three to five business days."

"What?!?" I was boggled. "You're going to charge me a consulting fee? I'm your son! We used to work together!"

"Oh, I'm sure you can afford it, Detective," she sneered.

Oh great. She still hadn't forgiven me for leaving the family business. There were some things we would never agree on: I sought after the truth, while she always had her clients' best interests at heart. "Mom...you know why I had to join the MPD."

"And you know why I have to charge for a consultation on an official police investigation. I'm running a business here!"

I sighed and made my way to the door. "You don't think I can talk you into a 'friends and family' discount?"

She laughed. "We'll see. Good luck, Detective. And be careful--these cows mean business."

Author's Note

I am way more proud of that 'moofiya' pun than I should be.

Case 7: Of Borscht and Bovines

I was able to convince Laser to come with me as backup. Or rather, she threatened to zap my mane into a bouquet of petunias if I went there alone. The Cattle District looked similar to other old parts of the City, all closely packed brick buildings and cobblestone roads. Cows just happened to outnumber ponies in this area. The location Mother gave me was a lively salt-lick in an old neighborhood. An enormous bull sat behind the counter, wiping it down with a rag. He was muscular and sleek, with a dangerous looking scar across his right eye. He also had some jewelry: a brass nose ring--popular with cows--and a surprisingly delicate arrangement of gold bands on his horns, which were attached to thin gold chains running between his horns, which formed a complex spiderweb pattern.

Laser Focus and I tried to walk in casually, her in a dress and me in a coat to conceal our "hello there I'm a cop" cutiemarks. Thankfully, the party came to a screeching halt for only a brief moment, before they deemed us harmless and resumed their revelry. I walked up to the counter and ordered a saspirilla, and Lase asked for a cranberry juice.

"We do not have sticky sweet sodas or silly fruit juices here. Only borscht, potato juice, and salt. You know, the establishment across the street might have saspirilla..." His accent belied his Kostroma heritage. We had come to the right place.

"Ah, in that case I'll have a potato juice. You want anything dear?"

Laser blushed as she remembered what our cover was supposed to be. "Yes darling, I would love to sample some of that borscht! It sounds so deliciously exotic!"

The bull gave Laser a suspicious look. "...is just beet soup."

I gave a 'quit trying too hard' kick under the table as the bull prepared our order. I tried to get him talking. "Ahem, well, that is some nice jewelry you have there. Does it have any special significance?"

"Oh, you like my hornaments? I was thinking maybe today I would catch a pesky fly in my web. You know what I am saying, tovarisch?"

I swallowed dryly. "A-and that piercing is very fetching."

He prodded his tongue reflexively at the large nose ring. "Ah yes, this means I am married to my beloved. Would you like to inspect me further? I have a very nice udder ring you could look at, politsiya poni."

I hopped off my barstool and took a step back. The bull, who was actually a cow, had me pegged as a cop. "Sir...I mean ma'am, I don't mean any disrespect. I was just--"

She put up a hoof. "Nyet. Spare me your lies. Tell me plainly why you are here."

I sighed. "Very well. Is there somewhere we can speak privately?"

The imposing cow led us to a small back office beside the kitchen. Laser spoke up first. "We have reason to believe that a coordinated act of vandalism was committed by cattle. We came here to see if the Moofiya had anything to do with it."

The cow's face went blank. She rose and slowly butted us towards the office door. "You will not find answers here. Now excuse me, I have customers waiting." She pushed us out into the dining area and eventually out onto the street. "Take your investigation elsewhere. Please do not come back."

Laser Focus and I slowly patrolled Little Kostroma, wondering what to do next. We passed a small rock back and forth using our magic. Laser used her powerful horn to zip the rock rapidly over my head. "Should we try some of the other names and addresses on your list?"

I caught the rock deftly and flicked it back to her. "Hmm, I'm more inclined to let the rumor mill turn for a couple days. Let the word get out that the cops are hunting down the vandals. That might be enough to smoke them out."

She passed the rock back, this time narrowly missing the tip of my horn. "Or the vandals skip town when word gets out. Or we both get fitted for some concrete horseshoes."

"Oh come now, Lase, it's just a few broken windows. That kind of thing only happens in your crime novels."

Laser scoffed. "What, you don't think Moofiya enforcers read those too? And it's not about the severity of the crime, it's about maintaining authority. They will eliminate anything that might comprimise their operations, including an extortion racket."

Suddenly, the crimson mare went silent, her pebble frozen between us in mid throw. "Um...Clover? Did it just get quiet all of a sudden?"

I looked around and crouched into a fighting stance. A half dozen young bulls with too many piercings appeared out of a narrow alley. A muscular brown and white bull spoke up. "Are you ponies lost? You're close to a subway station; we can show you a shortcut."

I dipped my head low, horn glowing at the ready. "Don't even try it, little bull."

The gang laughed and moved to surround us. "You are a brave one, Blue! Now what was it the pretty red mare said about concrete horseshoes?"

Laser snarled in a very unladylike manner, her horn glowing with piercing red light. "Alright, that's close enough. Not another hoofstep!"

I slowly swept my horn at the gang, keeping my head low. "Speaking of hooves, I can't help but notice all of yours are impeccablely hooficured. You simply must tell me where you got them done."

A skinny white bull chuckled. "Haha, a fancy pegasus family does them for free!"

The leader snorted aggressively. "Zatknis, Pietr!"

"Don't use my name, Vasily!"

"Aaaaah don't use my name either! Alright that's it, let's get them!" The leader charged at us.

Laser and I spoke as one. "I've got the big one!" We both fired our magic at the charging bull. The twin blasts rocketed around one another in a double helix of red and green. They hit Vasily between the horns, causing him to seize in place and collapse in a snoring heap.

The snarling red mare aimed her horn at the rest of the gang. "Anybody else want to go nighty night?" I have never heard baby talk sound so threatening. The gang stood stunned, mouths agape.

I took charge. "Alright boys, I want all your bellies and noses on the ground, unless you want to end up like your friend here." They all knelt as one, laying their heads on the asphalt. I pulled my radio out of my coat. "Central this is 88, at 23rd and Plum. We have six 10-95's, one in need of medical attention, requesting pick up, over."

The radio crackled in response. "Did I read you right, 88? Six suspects in custody? That's a new record, Lucky."

I rolled my eyes. "Cut the chatter, Central. I need that pick up."

"10-4, pick up is en route, ETA ten minutes. Good job, detective."

Author's Note

FYI, Kostroma is a Russian breed of cattle.

Case 8: The Haute Hooficure

Pietr sat alone in the interrogation room, staring dejectedly at his skinny cloven hooves. He was indeed all white, except for a spot of black around his right eye. His three brass earrings glinted in the solitary light of the austere little room. The Chief and I watched him through the reflective mirror. "So Chief, will you allow it? I think I can get him to open up."

The Chief grumbled, "If you think it will help, I don't see why not."

"Thanks Chief!" I put on a stern face and walked into the room. The calf looked up at me like I was his executioner. I assumed my gravest tone of voice. "I hope you understand how serious this is, Pietr. You and your friends did something very illegal. Somepony could have gotten badly hurt."

Tears welled up in his big eyes. "Please don't tell my mother."

I looked thoughtful. "Hmm...maybe that can be arranged."

He looked suspicious. "Wait, really?"

"Yes. If you tell us why you did it."

A scowl darkened his face. "I'm not a snitch..."

I leaned on the table, looming over him. "And you're not a gangster, either. You're smarter than this. Why are you running with these fools?"

He couldn't meet my gaze. "Well, I...they're cool, and they have money, and--"

"And they hurt ponies unless they pay them. Have you hurt somepony, Pietr?"

"No! He just told us to break a few windows."

"Who told you?"

He shrugged. "The Beshenyy Byk."

"The Raging Bull?" Pietr's eyes went wide as he realized what he let slip. He looked like he was going to be sick.

I gently put my hoof on his shoulder. "Thank you Pietr. It'll be alright. What you said will not come back to you, I promise. We're going to find this bull and stop him from hurting anypony else."

The young bull looked hopeful. "...and you really won't tell Mama about this?"

I grinned. "Nope. You will." Pietr groaned and buried head between his hooves.

~~~

Soft music was playing as I sat back in a poofy-cushioned lounge chair. Two pegasi were filing and shaping my hooves, while two more massaged my shoulders. "You know, this is pretty nice. I don't know about this goop on my face though."

Burlington Satin laughed. "It's a mud mask, Clover. It's supposed to take years off your face! It's the least we could do to thank you for freeing us and the other local businesses from those extortionists."

"And I refuse to believe putting cucumbers on my eyes does anything but make me look silly." I ate the offending vegetables, and they were swiftly replaced with a fresh pair.

I heard Sheer Satin say, "Cucumbers contain antioxidants which reduce eye irritation, while the cooling effect reduces puffiness around the eyes."

"If you say so."

Laser chuckled. "Just relax and enjoy it!"

"You know, I could get used to this treatment," said the Chief. "Stellar job on this case, Detective Clues."

"Wow, thanks Chief! That's...literally the nicest thing I've ever heard you say."

"Yeah, well keep it to yourself. I don't want the other officers thinking I've gone soft." He then sighed contentedly as a pony polished his hooves to an elegant shine.