Prize Inside

by Ruble Rouser

Rating: everyone
Tags: Comedy, Pinkie Pie, Slice of Life, Twilight Sparkle, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Rainbow Dash
Length: 3457

Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash go against each other in the search for the super-rare Happy Crunch Cereal prize.

Happy Crunch Cereal Corporation is putting new prizes at the bottom of all their cereal boxes. On the back of each box is a description of the five possible prizes and the indication there is a sixth, super rare prize. Pinkie Pie really wants that super-rare prize. Unfortunately for her, so does Rainbow Dash.

Published 2013-10-22 23:10:02 UTC
Last updated 2013-11-02 01:20:49 UTC

Part One

Twilight descended the stairs and rubbed the sleep from her eyes. She found Pinkie Pie already full of energy, bouncing around the kitchen in anticipation of her hostess’s awakening.

“Oh good, you’re up!” The pink mare said excitedly, keeping eye contact with Twilight as she bounced up to her. “Thank you sooo much for inviting me to your sleep-over last night!”

“Thank you for staying…err, do you want some breakfast?” Twilight asked hesitantly as her guest continued bounding around the table. Pinkie Pie stopped and immediately took a seat at the kitchen table.

“Yes, please!”

Twilight levitated a box of cereal out of a cupboard and milk from out of the fridge. She set them on the table and did the same with a pair of bowls and spoons. She apologized, “Spike is out of town, so this is really all I can offer.”

“Don’t apologize, silly, this is great!” Pinkie smiled genuinely and began pouring herself a bowl of Happy Crunch. Twilight sat across from her and waited for the cereal box to be relinquished. Pinkie Pie suddenly gasped and held the box an inch from her face.

“What’s wrong? It isn’t expired is it?” Twilight couldn’t recall when she’d purchased the cereal. Her view of Pinkie Pie’s face was obstructed by the box.

“Twilight,” Pinkie pie said seriously, her face still behind the box, “you haven’t found the prize yet, have you?”

“Well, no, I—”

“Good!” Pinkie upended the box over her bowl and watched as a mountain of cereal overflowed onto the tabletop. A green whistle in a small plastic bag sat atop the pile. Pinkie frowned at seeing it, and tossed the empty box over her shoulder.

“Dare I ask what that was about?” Twilight asked, levitating the empty box off the floor and over to her. Pinkie Pie absentmindedly pawed through the cereal, looking for something that wasn’t there. Twilight turned the box to look at the back and saw the words “Prize Inside!” in big red letters. There were pictures of the five possible toys and a big question mark.

“I didn’t win,” Pinkie mumbled. She poured milk over her pile of cereal, only making the mess worse.

“Every box contains a prize. Only one box contains the super-rare, mystery prize. Find it and win…100,000 bits?!” Twilight read from the box in surprise. “Pinkie, what would you even do with all that money?”

“Forget the money, I want that prize,” she replied. “Money is money, but that prize could be anything. It could be the greatest toy ever, or a hot air balloon, or a mime, or a space ship, or—”

“Pinkie, half those things wouldn’t fit in the box, and besides, do you know what your odds of finding it are? Happy Crunch makes thousands of these boxes a day; you’ll never find that ONE box that has the prize.” Twilight levitated another box of Happy Crunch out of her cupboard, and Pinkie Pie jumped for it as it passed. She missed and fell back into her seat.

“You could use your x-ray magic!” Pinkie Pie shouted. Twilight hadn’t even thought of that, and tried her spell on the box. Its cardboard exterior remained solid.

“They must have cast an anti-x-ray spell on it to prevent cheating.” Twilight said, magically opening the box and pouring cereal into her bowl.

“Just let me look for the prize!” Pinkie Pie held her hooves out over the table, reaching for the cereal box. Twilight just looked at her with her brow furrowed. Pinkie realized her host was growing impatient with her. She looked down at her bowl and an idea formed. She began shoveling spoonfuls of the sugary cereal into her mouth until the bowl was empty.

"Would you like a refill?” Twilight asked sarcastically, aware of her friend’s scheme. Pinkie nodded rapidly and expected Twilight to pass her the cereal box. Instead, she took Pinkie’s bowl and filled it from her side of the table.

“More…just a little more…a teency bit more,” Pinkie said as Twilight poured the cereal. Something shiny inside the box emerged from the puffed corn flakes, and it slowly approached the opening. Twilight tipped the box back and whatever was inside sunk back to the bottom.

“There you are,” Twilight said, passing the bowl back happily. Pinkie upended the bowl into her mouth and swallowed everything in one gulp. She then slid the bowl back across the table and waited for it to be filled. Twilight pretended not to notice, and took a bite of her cereal. She sat in silence, reading the nutrition facts off the side of the box in between bites.

“Twilight,” Pinkie said, staring at her friend. “Twilight?” she repeated when she received no response. “Twiiiii Liiiiiiight?”

The unicorn looked away from the box for a split second then back. Pinkie Pie finally grew impatient and leapt across the table, grabbing the box and tackling Twilight out of her chair. She sat on top of her and dumped the contents of the box. A pair of plastic earrings fell onto Twilight’s chest and Pinkie Pie compared them to the possible prizes on the box.

“Nope. Not the mystery prize,” Pinkie Pie said, disappointed.

“Pinkie Pie…Get off of me,” Twilight said with annoyance. The pink pony jumped off of her friend and bounced in place.

“Do you have another box? I bet that one has the mystery prize in it!” Pinkie Pie bounced towards the pantry cupboard.

Twilight teleported in front of Pinkie Pie and put her hooves against the bouncing pony. “Pinkie Pie! Stop! I don’t have any more cereal.” She closed her eyes as she struggled to restrain her guest.

“Yes you do! See?” Pinkie Pie was sitting in the open cupboard holding Twilight’s last box of Happy Crunch. Twilight opened her eyes and fell to the floor; no longer supported by Pinkie Pie.

Both Pinkie Pie and the box were suddenly surrounded by Twilight’s magic aura and levitated apart. “You should go,” Twilight said with agitation, holding Pinkie Pie right up to her face. With a flick of her horn, Twilight sent Pinkie flying out the library door. She slammed the door shut and let out a sigh of relief.

Her guest was gone but the mess remained; her half eaten bowl of cereal splattered across the floor, and the table covered in Pinkie’s mess. Twilight used her magic to clean the kitchen to its former spotless glory. She set herself out a clean bowl and prepared to enjoy a quiet breakfast.

Part Two

Pinkie Pie ran from the tree house library in search of more boxes to open. She burst into Sugarcube Corner and ran past a startled Mrs. Cake.

“Pinkie, what are you—”

Pinkie reappeared and slapped her hoof over Mrs. Cake’s mouth to shush her. Their eyes met and Mrs. Cake looked at her with worry. Pinkie Pie’s eyes darted left and right and she ran into the panty without a word. Mrs. Cake was hesitant to follow, but peeked around the corner to see Pinkie Pie upending cereal boxes over her head. She picked up several individually wrapped toys, and inspected them with scrutiny.

“Pinkie, dear, are you—”

Once more her words were cut off by a pink hoof against her lips. Pinkie looked around nervously before diving out the nearest window. Mrs. Cake simply stood there in confusion, and looked at the mess she now had to clean up.

Pinkie Pie peeked in the window of a random house as a family was sitting down for breakfast. A bowl of Happy Crunch was being passed around the table, and Pinkie eyed it longingly. Just as the young colt sitting at the table went to pour his own bowl, Pinkie Pie burst from the box. The family cried out in fear as the pink pony sent flakes of cereal flying across the kitchen.

Pinkie Pie searched through the flakes until she found the prize. “Another whistle? She asked angrily. “Where is that mystery prize?!”

“Please, whatever you want, just take it! Just don’t hurt us!” The father of the household held his wife and young son close as the pink pony turned to look at them.

“Do you have any more Happy Crunch?”

“In the cupboard,” the stallion replied, shakily pointing his hoof to a wooden cupboard. “Just take it, please, it’s yours.”

Pinkie ravaged the cupboard until she found the box she was looking for, which she promptly tore open. A glow-in-the-dark top fell out of the flakes and Pinkie Pie picked it up excitedly. She consulted the box only to find it was one of the default prizes she hadn’t gotten yet.

She turned and smiled happily at the frightened family. “Sorry about that, I’ll be going now.” She bounced out the front door and let it shut behind her. The family just looked from one another in confusion.

Pinkie Pie continued to bounce all the way to the grocery store in downtown Ponyville; the automatic doors sliding open as she bounced on the pressure pad. She made her way to the cereal aisle, and stared in awe at the rows of brightly colored boxes. Casually, she whistled to herself as she approached the red and yellow Happy Crunch boxes.

The sound of cereal pouring onto the linoleum was barely audible in the crowded super market. That is, with the exception to a trained associate.

“Clean up! Aisle 4!”

Pinkie Pie looked up to see a uniformed stallion running towards her levitating a broom and dustpan. She tried to quickly sort through the flakes for the prize. Another pair of fake ear rings emerged, and she stood up nervously.

“It just…broke open—yeah! That’s what happened!” Pinkie Pie explained to the associate. He looked down at the pile of cereal and back up at Pinkie Pie.

“Feel free to pick out another, we won’t charge you for this one.” The associate smiled and began sweeping up the spill. Pinkie Pie grabbed another box off the shelf and pretended to read the back for the first time.

“Oh, a mystery prize inside? How fascinating!”

“Yeah, that hundred thousand bit prize is pretty cool too,” the employee said as he finished sweeping up the cereal. “You have a good day, ma’am.”

“You too!” Pinkie shouted as the stallion ran off. She quickly checked to make sure she was the only pony in the aisle and ripped open the box. “Oh no. This one is damaged too.” She spoke like a bad actor reading from a script as she upended the box onto the floor. A Princess Celestia bobble head toy fell out of the box and Pinkie recognized it as being one of the normal prizes.

“Darn these flimsy boxes,” the stallion said, walking back up to Pinkie Pie and the mess she’d made. “I’ll stay here until you find one that stays together.”

“Oh, that’s so nice of you!” Pinkie Pie smiled as wide as she could; her right eye twitching a little. She grabbed another box and shook it as furiously as she could. The glue on the box held tight to her disappointment and she put it back on the shelf.

“Something wrong?” The stallion looked at Pinkie Pie in confusion.

“I’ll be right back,” she replied. Without another word she bolted from the aisle and left the confused stallion to clean up her mess. She returned after he finished, pushing a large shopping cart which she filled with every single box of Happy Crunch on the shelf.

At the checkout, Pinkie Pie held up the line as the cashier scanned her three dozen boxes one by one. The ponies in line all looked at her with raised eyebrows, and she chuckled nervously, “It’s REALLY good cereal.”

When she left, she was nothing more than a pile of bags with pink hooves sticking out the bottom. She trotted home blindly; an occasional twitch alerting her of impending collisions.

“Hey Pinkie!” a familiar voice from above shouted. “Is that you?”

Every-pony’s favorite blue pegasus swooped down off the cloud she’d been napping on, and landed next to the moving mass of shopping bags.

“Oh hi Rainbow!” Pinkie shouted, sticking her head out of the bags to look at her friend.

“Did you go on a shopping spree or something?” Rainbow Dash asked, poking through one of the bags. “Happy Crunch? Pinkie, are these all full of Happy Crunch?”

“Yep!”

“Why?” Rainbow Dash grabbed one of the boxes and flipped it over in her hooves.

“Because one of them might have the mystery prize inside it, and I WANT IT!” Pinkie Pie let all her bags fall to the ground, and tackled Rainbow Dash. “I mean, it could be ANYTHING!” She got extremely close to her pinned friend’s face and whispered, “aaaaanythiiiiing.”

“Pinkie, I think you’re getting a bit—”

“En…Ee…Thing.” She pronounced the syllables slowly, continuing to stare into Rainbow Dash’s eyes. Finally, she let Rainbow Dash stand back up.

“Alright,” Rainbow said, brushing herself off. She picked the box up and went to put it back into the shopping bag. “I mean, what could they possibly put in a box to get—” Rainbow Dash trailed off as her eyes saw the 100,000 bit prize for finding the mystery prize.

“I don’t know, but I want to know!” Pinkie said, grabbing the box away from her friend and tossing it back in the bag. Without a word, Rainbow Dash disappeared into the sky, leaving behind a rainbow streak in the air. Pinkie Pie’s already messy mane was ruffled by the sudden gust of wind caused by Rainbow Dash’s take-off. She stared off into the sky, wondering where her friend was off to in such a hurry.

Part Three

Rainbow Dash knew she had a couple boxes of Happy Crunch in her own pantry up in the clouds. It was the most popular cereal in all of Equestria, after all. She flew at breakneck speeds until she reached her amazing home in the sky, and burst into the kitchen.

“Come on, where is it?!” Rainbow Dash asked herself as she tore box after box off of her cereal shelf. At last, an unopened box of Happy Crunch emerged, and the pegasus quickly took to tearing it open. She stuffed her hoof into the box and fished through the contents furiously. “Ah ha!” she exclaimed as her hoof brushed against something solid beneath the flakes.

She pulled a Celestia bobble head to the surface and it nodded at her. Rainbow quickly turned the box over, and with dismay saw it was a default prize she held in her hoof. Before the bobble head even hit the cloud, Rainbow Dash was off in search of more boxes. She knew Pinkie had likely bought out every store in Ponyville by now, so it was off to Cloudsdale.

“I will win that prize!” Rainbow Dash shouted as she streaked toward the pegasus capitol. Her shout echoed over the crowded Cloudsdale streets, and the citizens glanced upward to see the mare performing advanced maneuvers to avoid obstacles.

When Rainbow Dash arrived at the grocery store, who other than Pinkie Pie would be floating out? The pink pony hung from brightly colored helium balloons, and had half a dozen shopping bags of Happy Crunch tethering her down.

“Pinkie?!” Rainbow Dash asked in shock.

“Oh hi Rainbow!” Pinkie said cheerfully, as she always did.

“How-wh-what are you doing here in Cloudsdale?” Rainbow Dash stammered. “You didn’t buy all the Happy Crunch? Did you?”

“I did! None of the sixty-two boxes I bought in Ponyville had the mystery prize in it, so I came here!” Pinkie replied, waving her shopping bags around. “Did you come to buy some? Because you can come over and have some, BUT HOOVES OFF MY MYSTERY PRIZE!”

Without another word, Pinkie Pie untied several of her balloons and dropped beneath the clouds. Rainbow Dash began to panic; that mystery prize could still be out there somewhere, and no way was she going to let Pinkie Pie beat her to it.

Back in Ponyville, Mrs. Cake saw a pink blur enter the shop and disappear up the stairs. She knew better than to question Pinkie at this point, but when the sound of cereal bouncing down the stairs made it to her ears, she had to investigate. The door at the top of the stairs was closed, and sugar coated flakes of cereal were flooding out from under it.

“Pinkie dear!” Mrs. Cake shouted. Suddenly, the sound of rustling cereal ceased. She sat there and listened, and a low moaning noise started coming from the door. Before she could do anything, the door snapped off its hinges and a tidal wave of Happy Crunch washed Mrs. Cake down the stairs.

The pastry shop was now flooded half way to the ceiling with cereal, and Mrs. Cake burst to the top for air. A low E followed by an F natural played slowly through the store. The sound of rustling cereal behind Mrs. Cake caused her to turn around in time to see a pink tuft of mane sink beneath the flakes. Again, the unseen piano played its sinister two notes.

Mrs. Cake looked out over the ocean of cereal, trying to keep her head above the flakes. Pinkie Pie’s wild pink mane bobbed above the surface and sunk back below. Still the piano played, faster now. Mrs. Cake began to swim for the counter, and the sound of rustling flakes grew louder behind her.

Pinkie Pie emerged from the flakes with her mouth wide open, swallowing thousands of flakes of cereal as she traveled. She crunched down and disappeared beneath the surface once more.

The piano now added in an E flat, and an entire brass and string ensemble joined in. Mrs. Cake felt something attach to her leg, and let out a scream as she was dragged beneath the surface. The music that had previously been deafening stopped dramatically as Mrs. Cake went under. After a pause, a geyser of individually wrapped prizes erupted from the flakes.

Both Mrs. Cake and Pinkie Pie poked their heads above the flakes and looked at the prizes. Pinkie grabbed them and tossed them over her shoulder after a brief inspection.

The cereal level lowered as the shop door opened, and Mr. Cake looked at the mess in his beloved shop. “Pinkie! What is all this?”

The stallion had two shopping bags in his mouth, and “Happy Crunch” was visible through the thin plastic. Pinkie Pie jumped up, sending a spray of flakes as she sprinted towards the confused shop owner. He had time to backpedal before the enthusiastic pink pony came crashing down in front of him. She landed with a loud crunch, and sank slowly into the flakes.

“She’s been like this all day,” Mrs. Cake said, shuffling towards her husband. He took two steps into the flakes, and Pinkie’s hooves pulled him down.

“Help me!” Mr. Cake shouted, grasping onto his wife’s apron. The flakes started rising up around his neck as he was slowly dragged under. Once again, the orchestra started up, only to be interrupted by the sound of a needle being dragged across a vinyl record. Mrs. Cake had reached down and pulled Pinkie Pie to the surface; suspending her above the cereal ocean.

“Gimmie gimmie gimmie gimmie!” Pinkie Pie repeated, stretching her hooves out for the shopping bags that Mr. Cake still held. “I’ve gotta win that mystery prize!”

“Mystery prize?” Mr. and Mrs. Cake asked in unison.

“Yeah the mystery prize!” Pinkie shouted back. “It’s in one of these boxes and I’m gonna find it if it’s the last thing I do!”

With a tremendous effort, Pinkie broke from Mrs. Cake’s clutches, and grabbed the bag from Mr. Cake. She held the box of Happy Crunch above her head victoriously, and dumped the contents onto her face. A pair of fake earrings landed on her nose, and she crossed her eyes to look at them.

She went to bolt off, likely to the next store she was going to raid, but Mr. Cake slammed the door shut. She smashed into it and immediately began clawing at it like a dog wanting to go out.

“Pinkie!” Mr. Cake shouted. “You’re not to bring another box home until you finish all of this!”

He pointed to the ocean of cereal covering his shop, and Pinkie Pie gulped nervously.

“All of it?” she asked. A bowl and a spoon were dropped beside her as the answer to her question. A door slammed behind her, and she turned to see the Cakes had left her alone. Alone with about a hundred boxes worth of cereal to eat.