Swarm of the Century: Pinkie Pie Style!

by Twinkletail

Rating: everyone
Tags: Slice of Life, Main 6, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Pinkie Pie
Length: 1639

Pinkie retells the events of "Swarm of the Century."

Hi! I'm Pinkie Pie! But I bet you all knew that already! Anyway, a while ago we had some crazy problems in Ponyville with a bunch of things called parasprites, so we...

Whoops! I don't wanna get ahead of myself! You're gonna have to click that little "Chapter 1" link if you wanna know what's gonna happen! I mean I bet you all know already anyway, but I bet you never heard it from my side~!

Oh, and this guy here wants me to tell you all that this was written for One-Shotober! I don't even know what that means, but he seems nice!

Published 2013-10-24 00:00:05 UTC
Last updated 2013-10-24 00:00:05 UTC

Chapter 1

Hi! Thanks for clicking that! I guess you want to hear my story after all! Okie dokie lokie! Just sit right back and I'll tell you all about the Daaaaaay of the Paraspriiiiiiiiites! Twilight says I should call it "Swarm of the Century" because that's what you all know it better as, but it sounds much creepier like this! And it should sound creepy, because it's all about icky, disgusting parasprites, and they're yucky and creepy so a creepier name would be better!

Okay! So one day, I was at Sugarcube Corner! Actually I'm at Sugarcube Corner a lot, since I live and work there and all, but this time was special because it's the day that the story takes place! So I was at Sugarcube Corner like I said, and Mr. and Mrs. Cake were baking all these really tasty treats because Princess Celestia was visiting! The Cakes and Twilight weren't really happy with my style of taste-testing things for the Princess, but I just wanted to make sure they were all good! Oooooonly the best for the Princess, I always say! Well to tell the truth, I don't always say that. I only say it in situations where it applies! Like I wouldn't just be waiting on line at the rutabega cart and suddenly say "Oooooonly the best for the Princess!" Though maybe I would if I was trying to figure out whether or not I should buy a rutabega for the Princess, but then it would be a situation where it applied, so that's besides the point anyway!

So then Fluttershy ran into Sugarcube Corner and she was really excited about something! That made me excited because Fluttershy's really nice but she's also really quiet and she doesn't get excited much but she really was today! So we were really curious to know what she was excited about, and then three parasprites flew out of her mane! Yuck! Fluttershy's mane is always really nice and clean so I don't even know how that happened, but the next thing I knew she was asking me if I wanted one! So I said, "Ugh! A parasprite! Are you kidding?" Twilight and Fluttershy were all confused and that really surprised me cause Twilight knows pretty much everything! So then I said, "Ugh, now I've gotta go find a trombone!" I don't usually say "ugh" as much as I did that day but after that first time I said it I thought it sounded funny, so I figured I'd start all my sentences that day with "ugh!" But then I forgot to do that right after. Twilight and Fluttershy didn't seem to know what a trombone was, so I told them! You guys know what it is, right? It goes, "BRRRRRrrrrrrrRRRRRR!" I don't know if Twilight or Fluttershy said anything after that because I ran off to find a trombone, just like I said.

Are you all listening? Good. Do NOT try to find a trombone in Ponyville. I think I got the only one! Nopony knew what I was talking about! I finally had to go to the Valves and Vasoline Store (located right next to Quills and Sofas in the marketplace! Eeheehee, sorry, I told them I'd advertise~) to get one, and it was the last one! The last one!! I needed an accordion next, so I headed for Carousel Boutique! Now, I know what you're thinking. "Why did you go to Carousel Boutique for an accordion?" It's simple, really! I know Rarity makes costumes for ponies from different countries, and the accordion is a traditionally Scoltish instrument! I ran as fast as my little hoofsies would take me to the Boutique, and there's Twilight again! And she's giving more parasprites to Rarity and Rainbow Dash! And it looked like a big pink and white monster was trying to eat Dashie's head! But I'd deal with that later. The accordion came first! I asked all three of them, but they were busy being all weird and cutesy with the parasprites! Yuck! I mean really? Those things are terrible! So I just ran off. If they were too busy to notice me, then I'd find an accordion myself!

It was only a few minutes after I ran off that I remembered it was bagpipes that were Scoltish, not accordions! Silly Pinkie! I vowed never to make that mistake again. Though I guess I just did a bit earlier! Good thing I didn't Pinkie Promise, huh? Anywayyyy, I found an accordion! Don't ask how; I don't like to tell that story. But I got it, and that's all that counts! Then I was tired, so I went to bed. I still had plenty of time to get instruments tomorrow! There was no way those things would spread too fast by tomorrow!

The first thing I did the next morning was go straight to Sweet Apple Acres. There was this one time where I watched Applejack play a harmonica, and she was really good at it! She would definitely let me borrow it, because Applejack's really nice like that! And sure enough, I asked her for it, and she said, "Go right ahead, Pinkie Pie!" Ouh, wait, I didn't really do the accent well! Can I try that again? "Go rahght ahead, Pinkie Pah!" There we go! Bet you thought Applejack interrupted to help tell the story for a moment there, huh~?

I headed straight to the boutique afterwards, because Dashie once made this comment about how much Rarity likes to blow on things! That's why I put so many candles on her cakes! But now I had a harmonica for her to blow on! I got to the boutique, and there were tons of parasprites! They'd already started spreading! Thank goodness I'd started finding instruments already! Rarity made some comment about being busy. Seriously? I'm the one who's busy trying to stop the parasprite swarm! She wouldn't even help me find a banjo! So I went and found one all on my own! It was right in the tree near Sugarcube Corner actually! I forgot that I hid some there in case of banjo emergencies just like this one!

I remembered just in time that Cheerilee was starting her band class soon, so I stopped by the schoolhouse to borrow some instruments. Cheerilee was more than happy to let me use them! She's a nice pony, you guys would totally love her! She didn't have any maracas, though, so that was next on the list! I ran into the girls again a few minutes later and they had this big ball of parasprites with them! It reminded me of...oh gosh, I can't remember the name, but it was some game where you rolled a ball and collected stuff, and the music was all "Na naaaaaaa nananananaaa naaa naaaa..." I'll figure it out later! Twilight reminded me that I needed a tuba before maracas though. She knew more about this than I thought! But they were all too stubborn to help, so I went and got the tuba myself. I borrowed it from Berry Punch! I finally found some cymbals too! I didn't know Berry's daughter Ruby played the drums!

Then came my least favorite part of the day. Dashie made this big tornado and it stole my cymbals! That wasn't the really bad part though. The bad part came when all my friends told me that I was ruining everything. I tried to tell them that I was trying to fix everything, but nopony would listen to me and they all ran off. That made me really sad, and I almost just went home so I could be sad by myself. There was no time for that, though. I needed to get the rest of the instruments! I found a tambourine and tried once more to get the girls to listen, but they were too busy staring at the parasprites, so I said "UGHHHH" again and ran off. If they weren't gonna help, then I would do it all myself, like I had been!

The last instrument I needed was a flute. I knew Rarity had one for some reason, so I heroically saved the flute while Rarity sat on a stool and watched. So she didn't have time to help, but had time to sit down? Come on!

Now that I had all the instruments, it was just a matter of putting them all together. It took a lot of work, and I stopped during it to eat some candy, but I got them all put together eventually! I put on my best determined face (which is also my best "staring at the wall" face and my third-best "bluffing at poker" face!) and marched into town, playing a really fun little song that I'd just made up! Sure enough, all the parasprites followed me out of town! Hooray for Pinkie Pie! Town saver extraordinaire!

The girls all apologized to me after the parasprites were gone. I told them it was okay, because I knew that they were still my best friends. They said they should listen to me even if they don't understand me, and I told them I don't even understand me sometimes! Twilight thanked me for saving Ponyville, but then we looked and Ponyville was a mess! It barely even looked like it was saved! I didn't know what to say in response, so I just played my trombone. It seemed like a good idea at the time!

And that's how Equestria was made! Oh, I mean...and that's how I saved Ponyville (kind of~!) from the parasprites!

Do you wanna hear another story? I could tell you about how I became friends with a donkey, or the time that Rarity got kidnapped by dogs...

Oh! Twilight's saying that's enough for today! Thanks for listening~!