What Does the Fox Say?

by Dunsparce

Rating: everyone
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Cutie Mark Crusaders, Cheerilee, Random
Length: 2395

The Cutie Mark Crusaders go to school only to discover it's a day off. Cheerilee finds them, though, and decides to take them on a preview field trip for tomorrow's lesson

Monday mornings. The Cutie Mark Crusaders hate them. Especially when you get dragged all the way to school to find out there's no school and have no ride home. Cheerilee finds the stranded ponies, though, and decides to give them an early field trip as a preview to what tomorrow's school will bring.

Collab with this hunk of a man. It should be pretty obvious which part I did.

Published 2013-10-24 16:00:03 UTC
Last updated 2013-10-24 16:00:03 UTC

The Fox Says....

It was an absolutely splendiferous morning in Ponyville—at least it was for ponies that didn’t have to go to school. The ride there was bumpy as ever, though it seemed more bumpy today for some odd reason. Each pothole and lump in the road felt like it was a million times larger. Perhaps it was the negative effect of a misty Monday morning? Possibly, but this fact did nothing to assure Sweetie Belle and Applebloom, who were getting dropped off by their sisters, that it was going to be a good day.

Apple Bloom had woken up too late, and Sweetie Belle was awake too early that morning. They both looked hedgehogs that had just stumbled across an aggressive, roaring bear. Their manes were frazzled and out of place, with strands of hair sticking out in every direction. Sweetie Belle repeatedly blew a particularly annoying strand out of her eyes as the carriage came to a stop.

Apple Bloom practically fell out of the vehicle when they arrived at school, which had more mist surrounding it than a generic forest monster’s lair.

“Have fun at school today!” Applejack cheered as she drove the vehicle away. When the dead-tired Apple Bloom glanced up at the school, she suddenly got a kind of an empty feeling inside of her. Something seemed off to her, though she couldn’t quite place her hoof on it. Everything seemed rather…

Quiet..

Not a moment later, Sweetie Belle and Rarity pulled up to the school. Just like Apple Bloom, she plopped right out of her sister’s carriage and scooted with her back legs toward the school. She came to a stop next to Apple Bloom and sighed. She grabbed the loose strand of mane between her eyes with a forehoof and yanked it out, eliciting a small ‘ouch’.

“I take it you aren’t havin’ a good mornin’ either?” Apple Bloom mumbled in a husky voice as her tongue struggled to overcome its heaviness. She was still half asleep.

“Mmmmmm…” Sweetie muttered, as well too sleepy to even speak correctly. She stumbled as the pair got up onto their hooves and leaned into Apple Bloom for support. A loud yawn escaped her lips.

“Well, Scootaloo always gets here pretty early. Let’s go inside and see if she’s here. Maybe she’s havin’ a better mornin’ than we are...”

The two fillies wobbled on unsteady legs toward the school. Something about seeing it through the ghostly mist filled them with a sense of ominous dread. It was almost as if the old building had suddenly become haunted overnight. Both of the fillies shivered in the cold morning air.

“Umm… Sweetie? Does the school feel… empty to you today?” Apple Bloom questioned. Sweetie then yawned so loudly that if it were in a cave, the sound would echo for eternity.

“I guess...”

The two ponies suddenly saw the faint outline of a figure standing by the door. They couldn’t make out the color, but it was the shape of a turkey. As they edged closer to the figure, they discovered that it was indeed Scootaloo, her body stretched across the window of the school door. Something about the posture of her body seemed to suggest that she was in distress.

“S… Scootaloo?” Sweetie asked, rubbing her eyes.

With wide, terrified eyes, Scootaloo turned around, waking them both up very quickly. Her breath was ragged as if she had just been hyperventilating, and her face was flushed a bright red color.

“There’s. No. Pony. HERE!” Scootaloo exclaimed, breathing heavily. Her heart was beating so fast it could keep up with a treadmill. Apple Bloom also soon became worried, as she began to look around her.

“A-Are you sure? It’s seven-forty-seven on Monday. It’s a school day! School starts at seven-fifty!”

“Maybe… Maybe everypony died and the school’s haunted!” Sweetie’s voice cracked as she listened to the creaking of the boards around her. Her shivering body drew closer to those of her friends as they all sat in terror.

“AH!!” They all screamed in unison, shaking the very foundation of the school..

“Now, now, girls. Calm down, please. Nopony has died.” A familiar voice echoed behind them, cutting through the ambient noise of the morning.. “But I do want to know what you three are doing here this early.”

“Oh! Miss Cheerilee! Thank goodness! Why isn’t anypony here?” Scootaloo asked. She shuffled impatiently as Cheerilee emerged from the mist. She was frowning deeply, and looking at them with a scrutinizing glare.

“Didn’t you know? There’s no school today.”

“What?!” The Cutie Mark Crusaders all nearly fell over, shocked as a light bulb.

“Yeah! Today’s a student holiday! And I’m forced to come here even though I’ve finished all my paperwork. You girls have it lucky!”

“Augh...” Sweetie moaned as she plopped on the ground. “Really!? Gosh darn it! I hate you, Monday! What did I ever do to you besides loathe forever and ever!?” She flopped over onto the ground and began to hug herself tightly.

“Well, NOW what’re we gonna do?” Apple Bloom asked. “We don’t have a ride back! We’re stuck!”

“We can’t just sit here all day until our rides come to pick us up! That’s like six hours! That’s like forever... It’ll be so boring.” Scootaloo flopped onto the ground and buried her face into her forehooves. Muffled sobs escaped her covered face as lamented her wasted holiday morning.

“Huh. Don’t you girls ever read the calendars I send home. I highlight the holidays just for reasons like this, you know.” Cheerilee stared at the distraught fillies, each grieving for their deceased free day in their own way. Sweetie Belle was rocking back and forth in a fetal position, Apple Bloom was banging her head against a desk, and Scootaloo still had her head buried in her hooves and was moaning in sadness.

“Girls, it’s not that big of a deal you know. I can’t have you staying in the schoolhouse all day, since I have to do my lesson plans for tomorrow’s class still. We’re learning about biology and the animal kingdom.” Cheerilee walked over to the three fillies and picked them up one by one, placing them each in a line in front of her. “I can’t keep an eye on you here, since I’ll be busy. Isn’t there anypony else you can call? Perhaps you could walk home?”

“I’m sorry Ms. Cheerilee. We ain’t got nopony to take us home! Applejack is busy workin’ out on the fields with Big Mac, so there’s no way they’ll be able to answer the phone. They probably won’t even be able to hear it…” Apple Bloom frowned as she looked at her friends. “Either of you two have a way to get home?”

“Sorry, Apple Bloom… Rarity dropped me off, but today is a spa treatment day. She usually goes all out with those, and it takes all day.” Sweetie Belle sighed and looked out the window on the side of the room. The sun was shining vividly in the sky and a light breeze swept through the trees. It was almost as if nature was mocking her with a serene picture of nature and the perfect day.

Apple Bloom shifted her gaze over to Scootaloo. The slightest glint of hope still remained in her eyes as they widened from the tension. Her heart pounded in her chest as she held her breath, waiting for her friend’s answer.

Scootaloo simply shrugged nonchalantly and sighed. “Sorry, Bloom. I don’t even have a ride. I was walking to school and Rarity and Sweetie stopped by and asked if I could use a ride. I was sorta banking on them for a ride home too.” She flexed her hindlegs and wings, grunting from the strain. “That thirty minute walk really does a number on ya…”

Cheerilee frowned and looked over to her desk. Various files and folders with details for tomorrow’s lecture were laid out over the table haphazardly. She sighed and shook her head, then facehooved in exasperation.

“Well, I have an idea, girls. Since you’re here today and nopony else showed up, how would you like to try out something special? I’m not exactly keen on sitting here all day and coming up with a lesson plan, so… how about we take a field trip? We can go to the edge of the forest near where Fluttershy lives and I can give you tomorrow’s lecture there. It’ll be good practice for me as well, and much more exciting than sitting here and going over papers. What do you say, girls? Sound like a plan?”

“Yaaay!” they all shouted in unison. The Cutie Mark Crusaders and Cheerilee then all headed out to the woods. If only they knew what they had gotten themselves into.

The mist had cleared by the time they had reached the forest entrance and the temperature had significantly increased. The day was now warm and fuzzy, giving a new, friendly feel to the Cutie Mark Crusaders.

“Wow!” said Scootaloo. “We’re kind of off the beaten path today.”

“Yes, we are, Scootaloo! That’s because the path into the forest is a no-go place for shy creatures that are afraid of ponies. Over here, though, we’re bound to see some awesome animals!”

“Aww, cool!” the young filly exclaimed as she jumped up and flapped her wings.

As soon as the trees began to thicken, the group heard a rustling within the bushes. It was a wild raccoon, zig-zagging its way through the plants. It looked at the group with wide eyes and a confused look. It was not afraid, but not quite confident about the situation either.

“Oh, girls, look! You see that? That’s a raccoon!” Cheerilee said with a smile.

“Oh, oh!” Apple Bloom chanted. “Mah sister says that they eat all of her plants she grows, so we set up traps for them!”

“They can be quite the mischievous ones. They are scavengers, so they eat any food that they come across rather than hunting things down. Does anypony know what sound they make?”

“I think I know!” Sweetie said. “it’s kind of like a soft “ooooh” sound with a roll of the tongue!”

“Very good, Sweetie Belle!” Cheerilee aplauded. “Now, let’s keep moving. Maybe we can find some more cool creatures out here!”

They progressed on, the three of them. They wandered about the quiet forest for many a minute, but then eventually found themselves stopping once again to a sound coming from their general left. They glanced over to see some relatively small eyes on a panting, four legged animal staring at them. Scootaloo gasped in fear.

“Now now, Scootaloo. It’s just a wolf. Wolves won’t hurt you. In fact, they’re more afraid of you than you are of them, especially during this time of year. It’s hunting season. Does anypony know what sound a wolf makes?”

“Awwoooooo! Awooooooooo!” Apple Bloom howled. Suddenly, the wolf began to howl back and begin to pant.

“Tee hee hee!” Sweetie chuckled. “I didn’t know you were half wolf, Apple Bloom!”

“Do any of you know any other animals and the sounds they make?” Cheerilee asked.

“Bears go raaaaawr!” Sweetie roared.

“And birds go tweet!” Apple Bloom flapped her legs like a bird.

“And foxes go… uhh…” Scootaloo scratched her mane in thought. “I… Uh… What does the fox say?”

Suddenly, Cheerilee did three backflips, put on some funny face glasses, and grabbed a microphone with the number “2212” on the back of it out from a hole in a tree

“WHAT DOES THE FOX SAY!?” Cheerilee sang as trees’ leaves turned into strobe lights and changelings started erupting from chicken popsickles that were raining down from the sky. Cannons with the epic face on them began to fire Endermen as the bass of the song kicked up. The bushes had become rainbow speakers. When the stunned Cutie Mark Crusaders looked back at Cheerilee, she was no longer a teacher, but a beautiful mare with a long, luscious mane

“Dogs go woof, cats go meow, bird goes tweet, and mouse goes squeak. Cow goes moo, frog goes croak, and the el-e-phant goes toot! Ducks say quaaaack, and fish go bluuuub, and the seal goes ow ow ow. But there’s one sound that no-one knows….” The stunning mare paused, making the Cutie Mark Crusaders anticipate what will go on next on this adventure into Tootsie Pop Land.

“WHAT DOES THE FOX SAY!?” Cheerilee sang as banshees screamed and shaked their ghostly behind in the background. Fluttershy then emerged from the bushes in a fox suit and began moonwalking on two legs.

“Ring-ding-ding-ding-dinga dinga ding! Ring ding ding ding ding dinga dinga ding!” Fluttershy danced as she backed up into the mike that Cheerilee was holding. She made a sexy look and raised her eyebrows at Scootaloo.

“Dear Celestia. Furries.” Scootaloo mumbled to herself with a faint tone.

“WHAT DOES THE FOX SAY!?” They sang in unison as the trees around all of them began to explode into sawdust flavored popcorn.

“Scootaloo!” Apple Bloom yelled. “What did you do to Cheerilee!? And where’d Fluttershy come from!?”

“I-I DON’T KNOW!” Scootaloo screamed in return as her wings turned into fruit roll-ups.

“WHAT DOES THE FOX SAY!?” they sang once again with toads teleporting all over the forest area

Sweetie jumped around frantically. “Uhhh… uhhhh…! Rewr!?”

It was no good, for the dynamic duo kept singing. Suddenly, a gigantic meteor appeared in the sky. If they didn’t figure out what the fox said, it would mean the end of them all. It was close, too, for they could feel the heat off of the sodium crum crackers of doom from above.

“WHAT DOES THE FOX SAY!?”

Apple Bloom thought quickly. “Uhh… Woof! Ruff! Yak!”

Suddenly, all ended, and everything was back to the way it was. They were in the forest, safe and sound. Nothing was wrong, and everything was okay. Fluttershy was nowhere to be seen, and all was good.

“Good! Yak is the appropriate sound!”

“Whew, that’s over at least.” Apple Bloom said as she wiped the sweat from her forehead.

“Now, can anypony tell me what does the--”

“AAAAAAAAAH!” the fillies screamed as they bolted out of the forest like rockets, leaving Cheerilee alone in the woods with a blank expression.

“Perfect!” Cheerilee began, “I’ll use this lecture tomorrow, too!”