Visitors from above

It all happened very fast. Spike fixed the door, fainted from exhaustion, and soon Twilight would be lecturing her friends. Who were inside the library for some reason. That was indeed a very confusing day for Lonestar. But he had to focus, since there still were almost a hundred ponies trying to break in. It wasn't so hard, since they had fragile hooves, not adaptated to combat like Lonestar's. Things were getting a little bit worrying when they started climbing the tree. They were about to open the windows ! They would rush in, and the amount of ponies would make it hard to breath, they would walk on each other, they-

And it all stopped. Nothing came from the windows. The tree wasn't trembling anymore. There were no more tickets. "Now I'll be damned," declared Lonestar. "Don't tell me that dang party of snobs made that much of a fuss."

Everypony turned to him. He was about to be lectured. And that would suck. Fortunately, Spike burped, and a scroll appeared. "A letter from the princess ?" Asked Twilight. "That was fast".

Spike read it aloud. "My faithful student Twilight, why didn't you just say so in the first place ?" He paused. "It has six tickets to the Grand Gallopping Gala".

They cheered in an uncomforting way, making Lonestar back off to the door, exiting silently the library. After closing the door, he saw an unexpected pony facing him : Voltar the omniscient. "Guten abend," he said. "I just received a message from vhe princess. Wir haben secht tickets to a party called vhe Grand Galloping Gala". Lonestar sighed. Now he had to meet the stuck-up nobles too.

-Super duper transition to later. As in a couple of days later.-

Celestia wasn't lying. They were given a mansion. A big, rich mansion. And the ten thousand bits too. "Ve now have zwei solutions," said Voltar. "Eivher ve use it all to make solar, vich vill be enough to fuel ten per cent of vhat ve need ... eivher we use it visely to survive in ein urban society". Though they wanted to go back to their killing duty, they had to give a good impression to the locals. So they choose to save that money for later, instead of making solar immediately.

"Now who's gonna watch dem girls ?" Asked Lonestar. "Ah already did mah turn, and ah say ya'll have to pass too."

No one batted an eye. But Leon volunteered, and everyone lost their mind. Well, not really, but it was still a surprise. "Ich sehe wir haben ein volunteer," said Voltar. "Gut, gut ... vhen ve vill try to make more money vhile you're out. Good luck, chameleon."

-Later, Ponyville-

Everypony was having a normal day. They hadn't seen any of the crazed stallions from the Summer Sun Celebration, so they assumed they were gone. Little did they know, one of them was amongst them. Leon remained cloaked during his entire day. Until he met one of his charges, the orange pony living in the orchard. He appeared right behind a big red earth pony with a green apple as a cutie mark. "Bonjour." He said, expecting a surprised answer. He got a very surprised answer. Too surprised.

Applejack was discussing with her brother, Big Macintosh. They were conversing about how he hurt himself, and how she could or couldn't handle the entire applebucking season. She felt confident. However, she still was aware, and when she saw a green pony pop up behind her brother, she did the first thing her brain told her to. She screamed, and Big Macintosh spinned, bucking whoever was behind him. And it hurt. Hard.

Leon was now on a tree. Skolldir bashed harder, but it still hurt. So he took a moment to relax, then jumped of his tree ... landing face first on the ground. Stupid pony body.

"Huh, sorry fer that," said Applejack, who rushed along Big Macintosh. "Thought ya were some kind of pale pony of death." She chuckled. "We're both very sorry fer that, aren't we Big Mac ?"

"Eeyup" said the big earth pony above Leon. Still smaller than Clunk, though. Leon got back on his hooves.

"I appreciate," he said. "Now, you were talking about somezing ... intéressant. What is zat applebucking season you seem to value so much ?"

Applejack was about to speak up, but Big Macintosh said first "Now hang on, ah don't want no apple thieves knowing our secrets. Tell me who ya are first."

"Mais bien entendu." said Leon, gazing firmly at the one who bucked him up. "I am Leon Chameleon, personal bodyguard of ze Elements of Harmony." Obviously Big Macintosh wouldn't believe that. But a nod from his sister reassured him, so he decided to let it go. For this time.

"Now about the applebucking season," said Applejack. "It's that part of the year when we harvest dem apples, we buck trees and fill baskets to sell the finest merchandise in Equestria ! However, Big Mac here hurt himself, so ah'll do the bucking this year."

That took Leon aback. He looked at the orchard, then back at Applejack. "Not to insinuate zat you are incompétente, quite the opposite actually, but are you certaine you can do zis all by yourself ?" She nodded, a very serious look on her face, and left.

Big Macintosh stepped towards him and declared "Don't try reasoning with her. She can be quite the stubborn one when she wants do". And he proceeded to leave too, leaving Leon to go find something else to do. A bodyguard's work wasn't so hard after all.

Cloaked again, he was on his way to the marketplace, when the ground started rumbling. There definitely weren't any earthquakes in this country, so what could it be ? A simple word, screamed by several ponies altogether, answered his question : "STAMPEDE !" There would finally be some action here. He saw a bunch of cows coming in his direction. He just had to wait. A single tongue snatch, and they would all be grouped, not causing any more damage. Any second now.

But before he could do anything, the orange farmpony from earlier jumped on one of the cows, yee-hawing like Lonestar would have back in the days. Soon, the cows were all tamed. One of them spoke up, much to Leon's surprise. He definitely had to ask Voltar exactly what was sapient and what wasn't.

Unfortunately, he had agreed with the others that he would stay in Ponyville until a major incident happened. So he followed everypony in the town's movements, in order to find a reason to go back to the mansion. It wouldn't take that long.

-One week later-

It actually DID take that long. Nothing, NOTHING happened during this entire week, and the stampede was declared to be a 'minor incident' by Voltar. Since there really was nothing to do, Leon decided to join the party that was held for Applejack. Nothing better to do, anyway. Most ponies recognized him and tried to avoid him, but he didn't mind. He was simply here to taste the town's cheese. He would sell his kingdom for cheese, if he had one. He still listened to Twilight when she did her speech. Well, tried to, at least, since she was constantly interrupted. Then came the moment for Applejack to be personally thanked by the population.

"Cool ! Way to go Applejack," said Spike. "That was awesome ! I mean ... heh." She was nowhere to be found. "Awkward."

She finally got up to the stage. Her eyes seemed to be focusing on ... well staying open. "I'm here. I'm here." She said, yawning. "Sorry I'm late."

Leon always had his ways with the ladies, meaning he had to know exactly what they were thinking about. And jauging Applejack's face, he could say she hadn't slept for days. When she finished her speech, she slowly dragged her award for stopping a stampede from destroying Ponyville, going back to the orchard. It wouldn't take a genius to say that something was definitely wrong. Leon decided to follow her. He felt like a stalker for a second, but remembering he was, he moved on.

Twilight was there too. He eavesdropped their conversation, and deduced two things from it : the first one was that Applejack was very serious about her applebucking season. The second one was that ponies were drunk when they were tired. Just great. Apparently, the rainbow maned one had an appointment with her farmer friend. Things got interesting when the former was launched up in the air, towards the hospital. Leon decided it was enough, and that Applejack needed a serious talk. He uncloaked, and walked towards her.

"May I have your attention for a moment, mademoiselle ?" He said, in a calm but strict tone.

"Must go to Sugarcube Corner. Must help Pinkie Pie." Was all she said. Since she wasn't even listening, he decided to cloak back and keep following her. Who knows, maybe she would cause a disaster that would be a sufficient reason to switch 'Nauts for the bodyguard duty. Applejack arrived at the bakery, and was greeted by a mare and a stallion that Leon didn't recognize. Apparently, they were the owners of Sugarcube Corner. Pinkie and Applejack began baking. Well, Pinkie did at least, but what Applejack was putting in the mixture made Leon exit the building urgently to throw up. It seemed like they were making muffins out of these ... things. "Mon Dieu," he said, "They killed us all !"

He was fairly certain this couldn't get worse. It did. To forget what he just saw, he took a bit of fresh air in the Everfree forest, slicing up incoming timberwolves while doing it. Upon going back to Ponyville, he noticed that something was odd. Little bunnies were roaming freely in the town, but most of all, ponies were screaming. Only three of them, but they were as loud as an entire population living the apocalypse. Enough was enough. No more talking, Applejack needed to stop. Anything. She was doing right now.

Twilight was there again, lecturing the farmpony. "Now Applejack," she said, "I completely respect the Apple family ways. You're always there to help anypony in need, so maybe you can put your stubborn pride aside and allow your friends to help you."

"Ah, no, no no no, ah don't need no help, no no no ..." she replied. And it was the last straw. What looked like an adhesive pink rope grabbed her and pulled her towards a green stallion. "Woah Nelly ! Oh, I'm flyin' ..." she said. Leon's left hoof turn yellow, sparkled ... and ended up straight in Applejack's face.

"Are we done yet ?!" Asked Leon, ready to do it again if he had to. She nodded. "Listen up, girl. Or you're head being électrocutée will be the second worst thing that happens to you today." He took a dramatical pause for the effect. Then he pointed a hoof at Rainbow Dash. "Your acts have already hurt our ponies ..." she waved at Applejack with her right hoof. Her left one was apparently down. Leon continued "You've seen what you've done to our citizens !" This time he pointed his hoof at the hospital. "And worst of all, the next one could be any one of us." Applejack looked at everypony present, seemingly all wearing the same stern and serious look. Leon turned to face the crowd "He could be in this very place !" He said, then turned back to Applejack. "It could be me ! It could be you ! It could even be-"

Thump.

Applejack was now lying on the ground, barely moving a limb. Everypony looked at her expectantly, some worried, some waiting. Finally, she opened her mouth and said one word before fainting from exhaustion : "Okay, mister."

Twilight was worried for a second. "Applejack ! Applejack, are you alright ?!" She said, until she heard her agree. "Applejack, you need medical atten- what ?" She was stunned. Her persuasion didn't work. Even this book she read about pony psychologie didn't help her. So she walked up to Leon and said the only thing she could think of. "How ?"

He just looked at her with pride and declared "A magician never reveals ses secrets." He then vanished in front of the crowd, like if he was trying to prove his point.

This was a very good day for Leon Chameleon, and he would finally have time to rest in the mansion.