Exploits of a slave

Chapters

Princess shorty and the snake
The scariest monsters are the ones you hide in your mind.
The fall that changed it all

Princess shorty and the snake

After a strange conversation that involved waffles, howler monkeys, and thoughts on necromancy, Twilight was able to fall asleep, though she wasn't any closer to assuring her sanity. However, she discovered a few things about herselves.

Flutterside was really funny, but never at anypony's expense. The little Discord in her head, while certainly her crazy side, was a great deal more sedate than his real world counterpart. And Rariside was so polite, and she made such wonderful conversation, even when little Discord brought up howler monkeys.

That was when Twilight thought, 'They're all part of me. If wanted, and tried really hard, I could be just like them.' This left her with a happy thought and a smidge of hope. If she ever got lonely, she could always talk to the voices in her head. She smirked at the wry thought.

But then she laid down, and wasn't met with the familiar bed she had come to love over the years, but with a hard wood floor. And she remembered. Suddenly the happy thought was gone, and the smidge of hope seemed so very far away. The voices didn't talk to her anymore, maybe they were as tired as she was? Twilight scoffed at how ridiculous her thoughts were getting.

Then she fell asleep, and dreampt no dreams.

And not once did she notice the eyes in the corner of the room, watching her.

-----

Twilight was woken fairly early the next morning by a ruckus. Several large gryphons rushed past her.“Hey! Hey what's going on? Do any of you speak equestrian?” She asked through the bars that separated her cell from the hall. One of the Gryphons stopped and opened her cell. {Come along, little pony. We must show you what happens to trouble makers.} He said, though Twilight couldn't understand it.

He grabbed her by the scruff of her neck and started lifting her. “Whoa! Whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa! Stop! Ponies aren't built like that! Stop!” Twilight said, trying to stop this gryphon that was obviously ignorant to that bit of pony anatomy. She braced for what she could only think would be a very painful experience. But it wasn't, oddly enough.

It felt disconcerting, being lifted from one's neck, but not painful. It should have been very painful. She didn't have anymore time to ponder this thought as she was whisked away like a little kitten. The gryphon carried Twilight all the way to the deck, where they witnessed a smallish gryphon with a shockingly large amount of white feathers tied to the mast.

{Why?! Why would you betray me for a trinket such as this?! Answer me Talos!} Shouted the captain at the white gryphon while shaking what appeared to be a piece of two-bit jewelry. {I'm sorry, captain! I had to do it, I would have starved! You always said, 'Keep what you take', I've been getting nothing! You know the cook charges us for food!} {YOU COULD HAVE TOLD ME! You think I'm such a devil of a captain I won't share a loaf of bread with a hungry gryph? We're family! Or at least we were.}

Twilight saw the white gryphon's eyes shrink to pin-points, and he started screaming something. She felt her carrier shudder. The gryphon that was carrying Twilight felt a tap on his shoulder, and turned to see good friend Jorme. They exchanged a few words, and the gryphon, whose name was Icarus, handed Twilight over to Jorme. “Saw you across crowd, kitty. Thought you want know what going on.” He said. And as peeved Twilight was that he called her a little kitten, and that he even still held her in such a position, she did want to know what was happening.

She nodded, and Jorme started to explain. “The white gryphon was caught stealing from ship because he doesn't been eating, for sake of greedy cook. The Captain leaving him alone.” He explained. “What's so bad about being left alone?” She asked. Jorme closed his eyes in concentration, looking for a word. “He left all alone.” he finally said when he couldn't find it.

The captain ordered the rope to be untied. After all, rope isn't the easiest thing to get a hold of a kilometer up. After Talos was released he rushed to to captain's feet and started sobbing for him to let him stay. But to no avail. The captain similarly grabbed Talos by the scruff of his neck, and threw off the side of the ship.

Twilight gasped and wriggled out of Jorme's grip. After she hit the deck, she rushed over to the rail on the side of the ship that Talos was thrown off of. “Flap your wings! Fly, you foal! FLY!” She screamed at him. But it didn't matter how harshly she screamed.

He fell.

Twilight collapsed, unsure what to make of this. That gryphon would rather be dead than alone? “Little pony, get back to your room.” She heard a voice behind her say. She turned and saw the captain, staring at her. “You speak equestrian?” She asked. But she never got an answer. {Icarus! I told you to keep a firm hold of this pony! What is she doing in a heap by my feet?}

{Captain, it's not my fault! Jorme asked to carry her!}

{Jorme! Get over here!} Jorme quickly rushed over and saluted to the Captain. {Yes captain?} He asked, glancing at Twilight. {Put this pony back in her cell, and next time you let her out, keep her in your grasp.} {Yes Captain!} Jorme said before grabbing Twilight by the scruff of her neck again and walking below deck to the prison blocks.

She sat there, stock-still, where Jorme had left her for a long time, thinking. 'He would rather die than be left alone.' She thought. 'Sobering thought, isn't it?' That was the little Discord she had in her head. 'What must it be like, being alone? All, alone?'

“It's terrible. You yell and you scream, but nopony's there to save you, to listen.”

'I don't believe you've been 'all alone' before.'

“What are you talking about?! Aren't you supposed to be a part of me? At my brother's wedding, down in the crystal mines.”

'Cadence was there. You were alone for all of three seconds.'

“You sound, different. Are you okay?”

'I'm just fine! But you, you've never been alone. Never truly alone. You've always been surrounded with your family, then your friends. And even now, in the belly of a Gryphon slave ship, you can't help but make gryphs like you.'

'Twilight, be careful, that isn't me. She's something nasty, something you'd be better off ignoring.'

“What are you?” Twilight asked foolishly. “My inner what? Hate? Angst? Envy?” 'No, no. nothing as fancy as that. I'm just a demon you'll have to face before this is through.' The voice said coldly. “A demon? Like what? What kind of demons do I have?”

But the Cold voice didn't reply. Neither did any of the others. “H-hello? Anypony? Discord? Sigh.” She sighed. “I really don't like being alone.” She whispered to herself. Their dialogue ended, so Twilight tried taking apart the pinball machine until night fell, though she couldn't really do anything with just her hooves. A gryphon walked by, and gave half a fish to Twilight.

She wrinkled her nose at the smell, and was going to say something, but the gryphon was gone before the could even squeak to get his attention. She sighed and looked around. She wasn't in the same cell she was in the first time, for this one had a barred window. She tried levitating the fish, but when it didn't even budge she remembered just where magic could and couldn't work.

So, she gingerly picked it up in her hoof, and walked over to the window. “Sorry.” She whispered before throwing it out. She turned back to her cell and spotted the semi-fresh hay on the floor. She sighed before walked over and taking a tentative bite. She grimaced. It tasted like sawdust and mud, but it was food.

She only took a few more bits before she felt like she was going to throw up. Deciding it was better to go a little hungry than to lose what she had already managed down her throat, she opted to stop eating. She quickly fell asleep, lulled by the giant whirring blades so far above her.

She found herself in a vast field of golden wheat swaying in the wind. “Hello?” She shouted to nopony in particular. “Is anypony out there?” She heard a rustle and a whooshing sound, so she whirled around, but saw nothing. “Must have been the wind.” She said to herself. She heard a thump and a whoosh behind her and she turned around again, this time faster than the last, but saw nothing. She heard the thump again, but this time it seemed very far away.

Then it thumped behind her again. She turned just in time to see Princess Luna wrestling with a massive serpent before it coiled itself, launched itself into the air, with Luna in it's grasp, and landed very far away with a thump. “Princess Luna! What's going on!?” She yelled.

The serpent coiled and launched itself again in Twilight's direction. “Ah! Twilight, We hast allured thine attention at last! Verily, how hast thou been these many days?” Luna asked when she had successfully locked the serpents mouth with her legs.

“Er, not too horrible, I guess. But I 'm on a prisoner on a Gryphon pirate airship that I think is going to sell me as a slave, but it's hard to tell with these Gryphons..” “Oh.” Luna said with a look of dismay. She quickly flipped away from the serpent. “Thou farest ill, than. I shall bring this to mine sister's attention, posthaste.” 'No!' The serpent screeched. 'She is mine!' “Vile beast, thou hast entered the wrong dream. Advance towards me!”

The serpent coiled and shot itself at Luna, though as fast as it was going, it was too slow. Luna quickly side-stepped and bucked it as it went by. The serpent writhed in pain but soon recovered. This time, the serpent tried to use it's massive size and surround Luna in its coils. Luna raised her eyebrow before flapping her wings, and then she began to fly out. She didn't get very far before the serpents tail swatted her down. The serpent quickly tightened it's coils and Luna was trapped firmly in it's grasp. “Any last words, Princess?” The serpent spat. Luna smiled before yelling “PIKA!” as loudly as she could. Both Twilight and the serpent were confused why her supposed last word was the catchphrase of a character in a popular foal's game, until a gigantic bolt of lightning struck Luna and the serpent.

Twilight stared, mouth agape, as the the serpent writhed and rolled on the ground, trying desperately to put out the fires that had begun burning on it's back. Luna, however, looked just fine. Better than fine, she looked energized. “What the Hay was that?!” Twilight exclaimed. “Why actest thou so surprised? Are we not in a dream, my domain? The minds play thing? Verily, whatever I canst imagine, it is set forth. And thou art more powerful than even I, for it is thy dream.”

“Oh.” Twilight said simply. She screwed her eyes in thought, and suddenly an asteroid made of vanilla ice cream flew across the sky, something that though scientifically impossible, she had always wanted to see. “Awesome!” she exclaimed. “Curse you! Curse you to a thousand deaths! However, now that the secret is let loose, I will destroy you, Luna!” Screamed the serpent, burned and charred as it was, glaring at them both. “You're going to have to go through me first!” Twilight said.

“You? You are nothing but a vessel. You will be dealt with quickly enough.” The serpent replied flippantly. Twilight growled, and moved to destroy the serpent, but was jerked back. She looked behind her and saw an iron chain on her leg, binding it to the ground. She heard a struggle behind her and whipped her head around to see Luna once again in the serpent's coils.

Twilight wasn't very concerned until it ate Luna. Twilight gaped for a second or two, before she began screaming. And then she woke up to somepony shaking her. She looked and saw a very irritated looking Jorme. “Pony, stop screaming. Go asleep.” He said before leaving and locking the cell. But she couldn't sleep, not with that thing in her mind. So instead, she stayed awake, and she thought.

-----

Deep in castle Canterlot, past guards, servants, and the occasional paparazzi hiding in linen cupboards, were the royal bedchambers. The one on the right was painted and stylized with a sun, the one on the left, the moon. Some ponies thought this had some kind of meaning to it, that Celestia thought that she was better than Luna in such a miniscule way that it was shown in the direction she walked to get to her bed.

They were, of course, wrong. What some might know, but few connected, was that Luna was left hoofed, and Celestia was right hoofed. (This is also how the political parties got their names.) But never mind all that, it doesn't have a lot to do with the story except that if you turn left, you will arrive in Luna's bedchamber. And in it, you would find Luna on this particular morning laying on a very nice pillow that she had favored since her return, dream walking.

Or being unconscious after she had been eaten by a giant snake in a dream. Of course, she didn't remember that. For all Luna remembers, she accidentally fell asleep when she had meant to dream walk. She awoke slowly, and her mind was sluggish, which was odd. For, strangely enough, when you are the princess of the night, you tend to be a morning pony.

There was a vile taste in her mouth, and for some reason her vision was blurry. She shuffled groggily to the Royal Powder Room. She sat down and took several deep breaths. Eventually, the blur sharpened, and she felt energy course through her. “Ah, nothing wakes you up like the smell of gun powder in the morning.” She said with a smile before heading to the Royal Bathroom to look her very Royal best.

She walked in, and shut the door behind her. There was nothing for several minutes, then an ear shattering screech from the bathroom. “CELLY ! What have you done?!” Luna burst out of the bathroom, startling two guards, and ran full tilt into Celestia's room, bowling over some other guards.

“Celly, I know you like a practical joke every now and again, but this is crossing the line!” Celestia grumbled and turned back over in bed. Luna's eyes burned with righteous fury. But currently being without a horn, she couldn't let physics know that. Instead, she opted for the old earth pony tradition for waking late sleepers. (She had experienced it some months back when she had visited the Apple farm.)

She ran down to the Royal Kitchen to procure an essential item. It took her minutes to get back to the Solar Bedchamber. A thirty minute trip for anypony else, but Luna felt like she was moving in slow motion. She tromped as loudly as she could across the floor until she was in front of Celestia's bed. She propped the Item against one of the bed's pillars and sharply punched it. The gong sounded, and Celestia all but jumped out of her bed. Okay, I lied. She did jump out of her bed.

“LUNA! What in Faust's inkwell are doing?!” Celestia yelled at her sister, now fully awake. “I could ask you the same thing! I think I could understand you changing the way I talk, but stripping me of all my powers?! That's going a bit too far.” Celestia was confused for a second, until she looked Luna up and down, and saw that she was no longer the proud Alicorn princess of the night, but rather, a very peeved looking dark blue earth pony with a very light blue mane. And she was a bit shorter, too.

“Oh dear.” Was all Celestia could say. “'Oh dear' is right! Now, change me back!” Luna commanded. “Er, Luna, I didn't do this.” Luna looked confused, then shocked, then very very worried. “So, you're saying, that something else is capable of stripping ponies of their very beings, and changing the way they talk?”

“Lu, I think the speech thing was a side effect.”

“I don't care! I don't like it! It's like I'm waring braces for my tongue. It's not nice.” Luna said with a tone of finality. Celestia sighed. “Lu, I'm sure it feels unnatural, but we have bigger problems than the way you talk. Do you remember what you were doing last night?” Briefly, the image of a giant serpent in a wheat field flashed across Luna's mind, but it was soon gone.

“Mmm... I don't quite remember... I think I was going to visit Twilight's dreams, but I must have fallen asleep myself.” Celestia gave her a worried look. “What?” Luna asked. “Lu, you are the princess of the night, you don't just fall asleep. You have to make a very conscious decision to do so.” “Oh, yeah, right. I must have... Forgotten.”

“Lu, I don't think whoever did this wanted you to remember last night. I wish Twilight were here, she'd be helpful.” Luna started tapping her head, like she was trying to remember something. “Twilight, Twilight Twilight...” “What about Twilight?” Celestia asked, now very worried. “Twilight's been foalnapped!” Both princesses swiveled their heads to see who had just spoken. It was, in fact, Rainbow Dash.

“Rainbow Dash? What are you doing here? I thought you were visiting the Zebrahara for the week?” “Yeah, we were,” Dash gasped. “but Twi getting' nabbed kinda messed up our plans.” “Where are the others?” Asked Luna. “Who's short stack here?” Dash answered her question with one of her own. Luna was fuming and was about to give Dash her best impression of the Royal Canterlot Voice without magic when Celestia diplomatically stepped in.

“Dash, this is Luna. Something stole her magic, thus stripping her of her alicorn status.” “Ah! That's right! I remember what happened last night!” Luna said before quickly explaining what had happened the night previous. “Woah. Heavy stuff.”

They heard a clip-clopping noise and all turned to see the remaining Elements of Harmony running at them. They all slid to a stop at Celestia's hooves and Applejack started talking. “Who is this?” She asked in a questioning tone, nodding at Luna. “I'm Luna.” She replied. “Oh, so your parents named after a princess? Is that legal?” Rarity asked.

“Well, it might not necessarily be illegal. After all, pretty much nopony knew about Luna when she must have been born.” Fluttershy replied. But then she realized that everypony was looking at her. “I mean, probably...” She squeaked, shrinking. “No girls, this is actually princess Luna. Ya see, she got eaten by a giant snake in Twilight's dream, so she got turned into an earth pony. She go a bit shorter, too.” Dash said for Luna, who looked like she was on the verge of tears. Not being recognized by even your closest friends can do that to a pony.

Pinkie Pie did not let this go unanswered. “Aww, don't worry Luna, I totally get it.” She said, wrapping Luna in a hug. “To go from one of the most powerful beings in the universe to just another beautiful face in the crowd? Happens to the best of us.” Luna sniffled, then steeled her resolve. “No, this won't, can't stop me now.”

She pushed Pinkie off of her and stood tall and proud. “W-well, anyway. If RD done did what she was supposed ta do, than you know Twa'light got foalnapped. What do we do princess? Es?” Applejack asked. “Well, there isn't much we can do. Slavery is very much legal in Gryphus, and our treaty with them is shaky as it is. Even though stealing a slave is considered fair play over there, our crew stallions aren't exactly adept in thievery, while theirs are.”

“Don't you have a super awesome crack team of secret agent ninja ponies just for this purpose? Like the wonder bolts?” Dash asked, starting to hover after catching her breath. “Er, no. We have the guard, and we have the army, but that's pretty much it. And they might consider using an army cheating.”

“Couldn't we hire mercenaries? Like the Neigh Team?”

“We can't do that, they stopped talking to the palace after Twilight accidentally turned them all into frogs for a day.”

“Well,” Rarity spoke up. “don't you have any exceptional soldiers? Any heroes?”

Celestia's gaze took on a much more distant quality. “We did.” She said quietly, absently. Luna patted her back comfortingly, though not without difficulty due to the current difference in height. She remembered that particular passage in her sister's diary.

“Well,” Applejack spoke, breaking Celestia from her thoughts. “Why don't we buy 'er back?” Rainbow Dash objected. “PHBBB as if! Twilight's already ours. Why should we pay money for her? And besides, how do we know they won't try to take us as well?” All of the mares stopped to dwell on that thought. None of them liked it very much.

“Ma'am, if you would excuse my interruption, we of The Guard are willing to give our lives to recover your student, ma'am.” The Elements, Princess, and Night all looked at the guard who had spoken, and saw that in the time they had been discussing their options, he had amassed exactly sixty four stallions behind him, all wearing the gold and blue armor of the Solar Guard.

“Though your courage is commendable, I can't let you throw your lives away. Don't you have families?” Asked Celestia. Over half of the congregated stallions started fidgeting nervously, including the one who had spoken. “That's what I thought. I appreciate the thought, I really do, but I get the feeling that what has to happen has to happen quietly, and sixty guards in full armor isn't quiet.”

They all stood there for several seconds, none of them moving even an inch. “You're dismissed.” Celestia finally said. The sixty guards all stomped the floor once in unison and turned to march back to their posts. “Very well, ma'am. But, if I may, you should continue your planning in a more secure location, ma'am.” Said the guard who had spoken, before he too walked off, leaving the mares alone.

“He's right. Come, we'll talk in my room.” Celestia said, leading them to the door on the right side of the hall. They all walked in and she closed the door behind her.

-----

Back on the ship, Twilight was still wide awake and scared. Dawn was breaking and light filtered in through the bars on her window. She heard a whistle echo through the hallways, and whoever was doing the whistling was coming closer. She saw a visibly cheerier Jorme walking down the hall, whistling as he went, trailing a cart behind him.

He saw Twilight and sighed. “Was pony silly and not sleep? Silly silly pony. Here, have fish!” He said with a satisfied smile while holding out half a fish. Twilight smiled nervously and took it with her hooves. He nodded in satisfaction and when about his business. Emptying the bucket, laying out fresh hay, and collecting the profits from the pinball machine, which came to thirty seven bits, five wooden nickels, and three bus tokens. He quickly finished and went on to the next cell.

When he walked out of sight Twilight went to the window and once again gave a fish a burial in air. 'I sure hope there was nopony underneath me.' She thought to herself. She then turned her interest to the fresh hay that was currently residing on her floor. She eyed it hungrily, but wasn't sure if it was safe to eat. 'You didn't care if it was safe to eat last night.' Commented the little Discord in her head.

“Fair point.” She replied and took a mouthful of the fresh hay. “I can do this, you know.” She told her little head Discord. “I can totally do this. Just you watch, I'm going to get to Gryphus. Who cares if I get sold as a slave? I'll just free myself. I can totally do this.” She declared. Little did she know that she was dead meat.

The scariest monsters are the ones you hide in your mind.

“Ican'tdothisIcan'tdothis!” Screamed Twilight in panic as she hung off the side of the ship.

“Stop whining color pony. No such thing as no-work-get-food. Gryphs can no get fish up high. Must work for food and room.” Jorme lectured while he himself sat on the plank of wood beside her, precariously attached to the ship by just a few flimsy ropes, prying off air-barnacles.

“Yeah dweeb, quit yer whining. If anyone shouldn't be here, it's us. This is the type of work slaves are for. That means you.” Gilda griped, pleased that Twilight was uncomfortable, though the feeling was dampened a tad now that she was forced to work as well.

Under normal circumstances both Jorme and Gilda's speeches would have been enough to rally vast armies under their control, or even talk down a dragon. Maybe even convince a lesser lawyer to give up his evil ways. But, Twilight was used to flying inside airships rather than outside, so she ignored them and clung to the side of the ship with all her might.

'Come now Twilight, this is an embarrassment. You've done scarier things than pry little-bits-of-rock-that-happen-to-be-alive from the side of an airship mid-flight. Don't you remember the hydra?'

“I never had a choice in that!” Twilight hissed, quiet enough that the little Discord in her head could hear her, him being in her head and all, but the two Gryphons beside her couldn't. 'You don't have a choice in this either.' The little Discord pointed out.

“There's a difference! The hydra I could do nothing about, I could just run. It was a heat of the moment thing. This is a rather deliberate action that I must be in full command of my mental capacities just so I don't faint and fall a thousand feet down and be met by my grisly end. There are no natural reflexes, as there might be when running from a hydra, only gut-wrenching terror!”

“Color pony! What you mumbling 'bout?” Jorme asked, pausing from his work to look at her over Gilda's head. “Nothing!” She replied with an extra 300cc of fake cheer. Jorme raised a single eyebrow in a way that reminded her of her good friend Applejack. She missed good friend Applejack. “Pony, if you not work, you get more job when this one over.” He warned.

Twilight felt that this was a message from Elysium. “YES! How about we save some time and I just go do something else right now?” She asked with an extra 200cc of real enthusiasm. “Wimp.” Gilda muttered, but Twilight chose to ignore her.

Jorme's eyebrows went from raised to scrunched up. He just didn't understand women. First they want free of their cell to clean the hull, then they want to do something completely different when they actually sit down to do it. He glanced at Gilda, trying to determine whether it was a girl thing or a color pony thing.

“{Hey doofus, my face is up here.}” Gilda said without turning from her work. Jorme blushed beet red and he quickly turned to continue prying those annoying little-bits-of-rock-that-happen-to-be-alive loose from the ship, Twilight's request completely forgotten in his embarrassment.

Jorme was right, of course. There is no such thing as a free meal, and the captain had no plans of perpetuating that illusion.

There were, however, surprisingly few chores that Twilight could do without losing her paltry breakfast over the side of, or sometimes inside of, the ship.

Gutting the fish was a no no, as was cooking them, serving them and eating them. She couldn't swab the deck without getting air-sick and ruining her work thus far, and being below deck for too long caused her to be sick anyway because of the over powering stench of unwashed Gryphon, which was very similar to the overpowering scent of unwashed stallion, but not nearly as hot.

She'd tried helping with the engine, but only got yelled at whenever she got near it. Same with the blades, but that might have been just because the ladder she was balanced on started to teeter, and none of the Gryphs where very keen on cleaning pony bits off of the side of the ship.

Also coupled with the fact that Twilight was their only prisoner, where she would normally be an expendable slave she was now a very valuable cargo.

She knew nothing about sewing, and any attempt to use her horn in any way for manual labor was met with exactly four hooves and many many teeth from Twilight, more than she had in her mouth it seemed to some Gryphons.

And that is how Twilight found herself washing dishes alongside Jorme, who was grumbling very loudly. “I no see why Jorme must clean dishes. Comfort color pony a night and stuck for rest of life. I eat off plate, don't clean plate. What slaves are for.”

Twilight had no sympathy for Jorme, he had been assigned to help her all day and had been grumbling for most of it. Grumbling about getting oil on his feathers, grumbling about cracked talons, and even grumbling about how all his grumbling had given him a sore throat.

And while she had no sympathy, she had no disdain, either. She couldn't really blame him for being miffed. It seemed that he couldn't do anything without the captain yelling at him to get back to Twilight. She didn't like being such a bother.

Soon enough the dishes were all cleaned and she was escorted back to her cell. The day was only half done, so there was plenty of time before sleeping was an option. Not that is was an option anyway. Twilight shivered as she thought back on the previous night.

She shook her head, refusing to think about it. She couldn't be... She isn't!.. But...

She was snapped out of her thoughts before they could become dark by a jolt. Not to her body, but to the entire ship. It happened again, but harder, the ship bucking beneath her. She steadied herself, trying to keep her hooves underneath her. The ship jerked for a third time, more powerfully than the last two, and Twilight was sent flying.

Being in a prison cell like cell, there wasn't really anywhere to fly to except the wall. And just like that, everything went black.

Jorme climbed down to check on Twilight, all the while muttering to himself. “Stupid captain... Making Jorme do everything... Why can't Gilda check color pony?... This stupid-... Color pony?... дерьмо.”

Very slowly, things started to become 'not black'. First, she saw the sky, and in it the Sun. But not the sun as remembered it, but rather a swollen purple orb, roiling and boiling as if it would explode at any moment.

She didn't know how long she stared at the impostor, only that it never moved, not in inch, no matter how long she stared.

Second, she looked at the sky itself, a dark shade of blue, almost gray. A few fluffy clouds puttered about in the sky, but most of them were gathered into a single dark mass, miles and miles away. She saw a pony sitting underneath the cloud cover, but she didn't believe who her eyes told her it was.

Instead, she glanced of to the other side of the sky, but what she saw there wasn't any better. Monolithic steel gray mountain grew from the sky itself, like massive stalactites. Some were smaller than others, but most were large enough that they grew right into the ground, even though their bases must have been many miles up in the air. She saw another pony sleeping under the peaks, where they hadn't yet reached the ground. The exact same pony.

The whole time she was surveying the impossible landscape, she had been stubbornly ignoring a long series of throat-clearings. “What should we do? She's ignoring us...” Whispered a scarily familiar voice.

“Dund yah worry yur preddy leedle head! I'll gettah tah tawlk!”

Suddenly Twilight's vision was entirely filled with something she felt she could except the existence of. Not that it was a pretty thing to exist. It was about the size of Spike, maybe a little smaller. It was red all over and had a horn in the center of it's forehead curved up, with a myriad of smaller ones sprinkled across it's body. It had an upturned nose and nostrils that were entirely too big. A mouth that looked like it was great for talking non-stop was filled with what seemed like hundreds of tiny teeth. It's ears were likewise large and stiff, curved upward and filled with nicks. Twelve tiny digits were shared across it's two tiny hands, and it's eyes were huge, entirely too much like a pony's for Twilight's liking.

After it had gotten her attention by jumping onto and grabbing her face, it smiled a smile that revealed that it had quite a few less teeth than Twilight imagined. She could tell by the gaping holes between the few that remained. It jumped off of her face and immediately went into a crouching position, which Twilight could only imagine was the way it stood.

“What are you?” She asked, eyes going wide in wonder. It struck a sultry pose and was about to answer, but Twilight continued. “How many teeth did you have at birth? How are you staying upright without a tail? What purpose does your horn serve? Can you do magic? What about your claws? Why do you have six on each hand when so many creatures with talons only have four? What causes the red pigment in your skin? Is that even skin? How hard is it? Why do-”

The red creature grabbed Twilight's lips and held them shut. “Sh sh sh, awl questons hav ansas, and yoo shawl get dem jus as shoon as Iy finish muy introduction. Dew yew undastan?” Twilight nodded rapidly, lips still firmly held shut. “Gud.” It said before letting go of Twilight's lips, moving in front of her and striking the sultry position as he had previously. “Iy,” He said, bouncing a non-existent mane. “am yah inna beoody.”

Twilight would have fainted, if it were possible to faint in one's own mind. She gazed first to her right, than to her left. Besides the giant ponies she could see that were so far away, there was a massive crowd surrounding her. All of the ponies were the exact same. All of the ponies were her.

But, they weren't exactly the same. Some were covered in scars, where as some looked like they hadn't seen a day of labor in their lives. Some were brash and openly eyed her, and others shied away from her gaze. Some were tall, others were short. Some were thin as sticks, others, to be honest with herself, were fat. She saw Twilights that acted like her friends, and she saw Twilights that acted like nothing she had ever known, even though they were just standing there, shuffling their hooves. Variants of variants. And they were all looking at her.

“Oooh, I knew we shouldn't have let Troll Twilight break the news!” Cried another familiar voice. She whirled around to see who had spoken, and she saw herself. Nothing altered in the slightest, except the voice. And the voice was that of Discord. “I mean really I'm all for fun and games, but this is no laughing matter. We need to hurry, and Troll Twilight's shenanigans are nothing if not time consuming!” Twilight didn't react to the words, only the voice. She stared at the voice that had begun to talk to her not so long ago, and she marveled.

“Hay! Iy am noight her inna trowll! Iy am her inna beoody!” Troll Twilight yelled at Discord Twilight. It crossed it's arms and turned it's head away.

“She isn't an outer, inners don't make sense anymore! I thought we had gone over this!” Discord Twilight yelled back. A meek looking Twilight with a very long mane edged forward.

“Um, Discord Twilight, I, uh, I think we should... I mean, uh...” She tried to get a word in, but both Troll Twilight and Discord Twilight's argument was getting continually heated.

“Iy dun cayre whut the reyst of yew Twiwlights agreeyed! Iy aym her inna beoody! Aynd anudda ting! Wheyre do yew getta be her inna crayuzee siyde iyf she awlready hays a inna trowll? Huh?!”

“Maybe from the fact that form the first time I spoke I've sounded like Discord?! How could that be interpreted as anything but crazy?!”

“Mayubee yew ah her inna eviwl, eva thinka dat?!”

“Why I oughta..!”

“Girls!” Chided the last familiar voice. “That is no way to act, especially around Waking Twilight! She's only just arrived and I'm sure she's very confused.” Twilight turned and saw she who had spoken. It amazed her. It was Twilight, but her mane was long and perfectly styled in a corkscrew. She was Twilight, but she was Rarity. Twilight and Rarity?

Twilight's head was starting to hurt. Or rather she imagined that it should have, if she were not in her own head. (Mind joke, Yohohohoho!) “Dahling, are you quite all right?” Asked Twilight-who-looked-like-Rarity. “I know this must all be very confusing for you, but you look positively pale. Would you like a glass of water?”

Twilight gave her a confused look before saying, “Rarilight?”

Twilight-who-looked-like-Rarity froze. Her expression didn't change in the slightest, her posture didn't budge an inch. Except for a blush that was spreading across her cheeks. Twilight was still confused. And she only got more confused when a pegasus version of her who appeared to be wearing a halo flew down from the sky and punched Twilight-who-looked-like-Rarity square on the jaw, sending flying into the crowd. “Thou shalt not leave thy mind in the gutter.” She uttered before flying upwards and out of sight.

Twilight looked in shock as the pegasus Twilight flew off.

Twilight-who-looked-like-Rarity rose to her hooves, dusted her coat off, and walked back to Twilight as if nothing had happened. She began to speak again. “I must apologize, I didn't quite understand when you first spoke, but I do now. I suppose we should start with preassigned names.” Twilight, who had been watching a small stream of blood make it's way down Twilight-who-looked-like-Rarity's lip, perked at the mention of names. Because names are important.

“I suppose I shall introduce myself and all the Twilights you've met thus far, and then proceed alphabetically. I am Proper Twilight. The mare behind me is Graceful Twilight, and the two mares glaring at each other behind my back are Troll Twilight and Crazy Twilight.” The two mentioned mares quickly stopped making faces at each other and folded their hooves. Crazy Twilight even materialized a pair of halos for good measure, but the effect was lost on Troll Twilight.

“Now these here are Aardvark Twilight, Adventurous Twilight, Archeological Twilight, Attackee Twilight, Attacker Twilight...”

Rainbow Dash was bored. No, she was more than bored. She was super bored. No, that didn't quite describe her level of boredness... She was Super Ultra Uber Mega Bored. Yes. That was exactly how she was feeling. Or was it? Maybe she could fit in a few more adjectives...

She was, of course, bored because instead of donning their various adventure hats and going to rescue their good friend/student Twilight, her friends and the princess(es?) were discussing tactics over a hot cup of earl gray in the Princess' bedroom. Tea is many things, but none of those things are 'Exciting'.

Dash glanced at (Princess?) Luna, still marveling at the fact that she had lost her deity status over a nightmare. Her mane didn't flow anymore, at least not like it used to. Without the use of her moon princess powers, the only time her mane flowed was when it got in the way. Of everything. All. The. Time. She had already bit her mane no less than seven times trying to drink her tea.

So, to keep it from getting in her way, she had tied it up. She first tried a bun, but there was just too much mane for that to work. She had looked like a dark blue hoofball had been stuck to her head. After that, she tried a pony tail, which made Pinkie burst into hysterical laughter, for whatever reason. It may have been the fact that Luna couldn't walk five steps without tripping on it. So, lastly, it was braided. Which worked. Probably because Rarity is a mane-witch.

Dash stopped examining Luna's mane and switched to studying her back, as if staring at it long enough could make a pair of wings pop out. But that's ridicules, if that were a thing Pegasi could do than there would be no such things as 'Earth ponies'. Or Unicorns, really. Just Pegasi and Alicorns. Or maybe not? Would they really want to share their gift of awesomeness? Maybe with her friends. Pinkie would love to fly. Not that she needed wings to do that, that is...

She started to stare at Luna's forehead, where previously a horn made it's self at home. That had also been taken from Luna. Dash had never been able to do magic, for obvious reasons, so she couldn't sympathies in the least about that. But that got her to wondering, did she still have Earth pony powers? She knew that Applejack could grew a tree in ten weeks flat, and that Pinkie was unusually strong for her size. Did Luna still have all that? Did she have all that in the first place? You couldn't really identify Earth pony magic without a demonstration, so...

At this point Luna was staring at Dash's forehead, perhaps to ascertain if there was anything going on behind it. Dash was just staring at her, probably for the same reasons that she had begun to drink her tea with a fork. Because they were bored. Luna lowered her vision just a few inches, and looked into Dash's eyes. And she saw it.

A void, dark and cold. Devoid of thought and reason. An empty chasm that had once been filled, even though it couldn't hold very much to begin with. Luna stared in awe as she saw the remains of Dash's Attention Span. It was completely empty. And very small. And come think of it, it didn't look like it had been full in years. She could see the water line, and it barely came up half-way.

But that was just like Dash, she supposed. Had a small attention span to begin with, and never filled it up. She would have chastised her, if she didn't do the exact same thing. She stopped philosophizing when she noticed that Dash was looking at her eyes. At this point they had formed a sort of bond, a friendship forged through the flames of mind-numbing boredom ignited by her sister's planning abilities.

She tuned into the conversation, just for kicks. Maybe they had solved the problem?

“... But if we wait for the sea monkeys, twilight may have already drowned in the nacho dip! We must release them before battling the cyborg dolphin-sharks!” Celestia argued.

“But if we release them too soon they'll have passed the point of rescue, leaving Twilight stranded and at the mercy of the salsa crabs! If you really want to release them early, you must send Soarin' wearing the Leather Speedo of Distraction to keep the sea monkeys in check!..”

...Yeah, no. this is stupid. Luna looked back towards Dash, but saw that she was now paying full attention to the plan. Luna narrowed her eyes, and she would have chastised Dash. If she herself had not used the Leather Speedo of Distraction as many times as she had. She blushed at the memories.

But she cherished them. Memories of good times. Back before she had to rule a kingdom with her sister. Back when she could dance on the Borealis and seduce the Stars. Back with all her friends... She still remembered them... Sea Foam, Gill, Applepie, Double Helix, Higledy Pigledy, Cape Hope...

All of them gone.

She couldn't look back, she couldn't fall prey to the meloncholy that had claimed her for so long after her return. But neither could she ignore such precious memories. She could never discard them, and yet not doing so would tear her to shreds, if not literally than emotionally for sure. She started to stroke her mane, immersing herself in memories of times long past, of her friends. They were gone, but did she not have an obligation to remember them, and hold their memories dear? If she did not, nopony would.

But she also had a duty to her new friends. She could not let the past muddle the present and damn the future. She looked at the faces of each of her new friends in turn. Pinkie Pie, who could always make her laugh.

Applejack, who counted her, an almost complete stranger, as family.

Fluttershy, who was so sweet and kind.

Rainbow Dash, who no matter what was always by her side.

Rarity, who... Made her dresses? Yes. She made her dresses, and would often times speak to her, counseling her, giving from her heart that which is so precious. Luna closed her eyes.

But there was one pony missing. Twilight. And she couldn't let her stay like this. No. She couldn't just stand back and look away as another of her friends were lost. She had already lost too much to allow that. For far too long she had been without friends, without those with whom she could share the joys and sorrows of life. Now that she had found ponies willing to walk beside her, to comfort and even chastise, should the need arise, she would not let even one be taken from her. Not now, not ever.

Luna's eyes snapped open, and for the briefest instant her pupils were slits. But, her now small magical pool drained, and they returned to their proper shape. She rose and slammed her hooves onto the table, cracking it.

“Enough talk!” She bellowed. “I'm going after her myself!” And she ran out the door, but not without slamming into them head first.

Rarity looked nervous. “Should we go after her?” She asked.

Celestia took a long sip of tea. “I wouldn't waste my energy. She has been... away... for a time, as you know, and still needs a servant to lead her around the castle. She's obviously not thinking straight, so she won't think to call one. Trust me, she won't get far.” She explained calmly as the group heard a cry echo through the halls.

“Damn you post-classical Equestrian slash Gryphon architects!”

Celestia tilted her head as if to say, 'See what I mean?'. She didn't actually say it though, of course. That would have been rude. And one did not maintain an entire kingdom surrounded by bandits and predators for a thousand years by being rude.

Applejack, however, was still looking at the door which Luna had exited from nervously, wringing her hat between her hooves. “Y'all absolutely sure there ain't no way she could get out? She'd cause a right ruckus if she did is all...”

Celestia patted Applejack's naked head in a way that might have been condescending from anypony else, but was almost motherly from her. “Please trust me, my little pony. The only way she could leave the castle would be if she jumped through a window. She might not be thinking straight, but she wouldn't leap out a window up this high, not as she is.”

Everypony's eyes suddenly got very wide. They all went dead silent and strained their ears, as if listening to something very quiet. Celestia looked at them all in confusion, until she realized what she had said. “Oh dear.” She breathed before joining in, hoping beyond hope that Alas had not heard her.

After several minutes of only hearing curses drift through the door, they relaxed. Celestia levitated a napkin to her head and began dabbing at beads of sweat that had appeared. “I'm so sorry, I didn't even realize what I was saying. Luckily nothing-” She was cut off as everypony else in the room dove to cover her mouth.

But it was too late, for the very next second they all heard a shattering of glass and a distant cry that sounded very much like “I'm coming! Traveling buddy!”

They all got up from their impromptu pony pile with a groan. Celestia stayed on the ground, a nervous smile on her face. “Whoops?”

Five hours later. Or ten. Or a hundred. Or a thousand. Or no time at all.

“ … Zebra Twilight, Zesty Twilight. And that is the last one. Any questions?” Proper Twilight asked. Twilight raised her hoof immediately, and when Proper Twilight didn't respond in half a second, she started waving it around. Proper Twilight gave her a look before saying, “Yes, Twilight?”

Twilight grinned hard enough to make a 'squee' sound before putting on a serious face. “Earlier you referred to me to the other Twilights as 'Waking Twilight', but you didn't mention it when we were going through the names. Why is that?” She asked.

Proper Twilight looked shocked, then amused. “I should expect nothing less from, well, myself. I applaud you none the less. I didn't mention 'Waking twilight' because the only Twilights that need labeling are the ones in here, your mind. Some of the other girls don't like it, but you are Twilight Prime, in that when our body is moving, you are in control, not any of us. I called you 'Waking Twilight' when I spoke to girls so that they wouldn't get offended.”

“Oh.” Twilight said with a neutral face. “I see.

“Well than what about those two giant mares? I don't think you mentioned them either.”

Proper Twilight pursed her lips. “Well, I didn't mention them because they aren't really, erm. What would be the word for it? uh...”

“Alive?” Suggested Blunt Twilight.

Proper Twilight looked uncomfortable, but nodded. “I would have liked a... nicer word, but I suppose it does describe them. They only appear to have token life. You see, when this all began, some days ago, even though you only heard Crazy Twilight at first, we were all 'born' at the same time. One might imagine such an event would be a fuzzy, and inaccessible memory. On the contrary, it is a very sharp one, for me at least.

“I awoke, and was surrounded by a multitude of ponies, all of them bearing a striking resemblance to each other, myself included. Now, we hadn't figured out any of the, shall we say 'specifics', of our birth. And before you ask, we still haven't cracked the origin. At any rate, those two mares were the first to rise. From the way they walked, I could tell they knew right away what they were supposed to do. One walked to those mountains to the west, and they other to the clouds in the east.

“After that, however, they did nothing. We've tried multiple times to speak with them, but they just ignore us. The only action that suggests that they are even alive is that every so often, at seemingly random intervals, one will wake up, and the other go to sleep. And, that's all they do. I didn't mention their names because neither of them have one.” Proper Twilight finished, just a little out of breath.

Twilight rubbed her chin, thinking so hard her head would have started to hurt, if she weren't inside of her head. (Yohohohoho!) “Well. That's kinda weird. But, at this point you're just going to have to add it to the pile. How co-”

She was cut off as the air was split by a giant screech. It made the ground tremble and the impostor sun spit flames all the more violently. The Clouds scattered, and the mare underneath them snapped her head to where the roar had come from, pure fury written on her face.

She growled, the ground shook again, and she started walking to the origin of the howl. All of the smaller Twilghts on the ground all looked wide eyed at the massive mare making her way across the horizon. “Well.” Twilight began. “It appears the situation has changed.”

Proper Twilight was not only staring wide eyed at the colossus, she was sweating buckets. “Twilight, my dear, I must confess I have not been entirely honest with you, and it appears that just now was the absolute wrong time to do so.”

Twilight turned her head to look Proper Twilight in the eyes, but she wouldn't meet her gaze. “What,” She said icily. “have you not told me?”

“W-well, when we were all 'born', the mares here with us weren't the only ones to appear. Along with the ones you see here, there were about as many who were... not so, nice, attributes. Mares that represented greed, jealousy, anger, and the like. There was a... a bit of a tussle. You've no doubt been having conflicting feelings lately? Devoid of emotions you imagined you might have at a situation? Well, I'm afraid we are responsible for that. At any rate, we finally sealed them inside of the mountains, where you should be able to still feel them, but were they can do no harm. However, there was one we couldn't seal, because it was like the two mares, it was enormous. And like Troll Twilight here, it was physically changed grossly.”

“Heyuh!”

“You see, erm, the thing that you heard and might possibly kill us all is Basilisk Twilight, which we've come the theorize represents your immanent death.”

The fall that changed it all

The morning was crisp and the eastern wind blew, many leagues up in the sky. The captain, passengers, ship, and crew knew, one nasty slip and they'd die! High up in the air the ground gave no respite so best not to-"

"Fluttershy! Not helping!" Exclaimed Twilight.

"Sorry Twilight..." apologized Fluttershy. "Look, don’t get me wrong, it's great you're becoming more open with your creative impulses, but could you wait until we land?"

"Okay Twilight..."

Twilight sighed nervously and went back to reading her book. Twilight had never really had a problem with flight, artificial or otherwise. However, after three to four hours on the small airship, and still not even halfway to their destination, She was getting nervous.

Twilight had accompanied Rarity and Fluttershy below deck to engage in calmer activities, she and Rarity reading as Fluttershy composed. But even being below deck didn't sooth her nerves. Pinkie pie, Rainbow Dash, Applejack, and the Captain, however, were engaged in a game of cards above deck.

“Pinkie, got any Jacks?” Asked Dash. Pinkie silently hoofed over the card, and upon seeing she was in possession of only one card, screamed “UNO!” “Now wait a galdarned minute! Are we, or are we not, playing Black Jack?” “No.” said the captain, who then saw that two three's were stacked one on the other in the discard pile, and slapped it, earning calls of dissent from the other players. This most likely would have ended in a hoof fight, but they were interrupted by a shout.

"PIRATES!" The four ponies all stood up, their previous argument forgotten. "Where sailor!?" The captain bellowed. "Off the port bow!" “TO YOUR STATIONS! MAN THE CANNONS AND FIRE AT WILL! And where do you think you're going?” The captain asked Dash after he had finished bellowing orders.

“Where else? I'm gonna buck some sense into some ponies that think that they can get away with piracy in Equestrian airspace!” The captain sighed in exasperation.

“Miss Dash, I have three, no... four things to tell ya. Firstly, These ain't ponies. If you'll see their flag, they be Gryphons. Secondly, We ain't in Equestrian air, haven’t been for hours. And thirdly, yer a passenger. 'Nuff said. Now get!” He said quickly, motioning her to the hatch leading below.

Rainbow Dash crossed her hooves defiantly. “And four?” She said, hovering so as to look down on him. “Fourthly, I won't tolerate mutinous passengers. So if you don't feel like flyin' home on yer own two wings, get below!” He growled. Rainbow Dash had suddenly gotten the inexplicable urge to guard Fluttershy.

Below the deck itself was chaos. Passengers all trying their very best to stay out of the way while the cannoneers rushed to load and fire their weapons. Above was a flurry of activity. Unicorns were busy emitting a shield around the envelope while pegasi all readied themselves by donning armor and an interesting and diverse amount of weaponry, from pikes to claws to maces.

'They certainly know what they're doing.' Thought Twilight as she watched them gather the items from the hold. The Gryphon ship was getting closer, and the more vigilant of the crew could even hear them yelling at each other.

“Держать судно в вашей достопримечательности! Не позволяйте им уйти!Бутылка рома в anygryph который захватывает один живой!”

Though they couldn't make anything of it, it didn't sound like they wanted to have a picnic. The Pirate ship was getting closer and closer, so much so in fact that Twilight could feel them.

The Gryphons rocketed themselves at the passenger ship, chanting whatever war cry they felt like at the time, changing their minds, and yelling something else. The pegasi waited on the ship for the pirates while the unicorns cast spell after spell in an attempt to slow down/stop the invaders.

The Gryphons landed on the deck and made war. Armed with wing blades and iron talons, they were quite the formidable foe, but the defending ponies were no slouches. The Gryphons quickly took an offensive position and the defenders were very offended. After the Gryphons stopped laughing and the captains exchanged customary insults the battle began in earnest.

Twilight and her friends could hear it all. From the screech of metal on metal to the squelch of metal through bone to the thunk of some moron tripping. That last comment was Applejack's. And while it wasn't very nice, it was honest, that's just what she does.

The other sound they heard which worried them very much was the report of a cannon, one just a little bit farther away than their own.

It wasn't until that day that Twilight truly appreciated floors. But, it is said that you never know what you have until it's gone, and alas, Twilight was now very aware of the floor. Being gone. But she decided not to scream until she was absolutely sure that was a bad thing. Then she fell, and decided to scream.

That scream was accompanied with four others just like it, except the third, which sounded closer to a sigh. Rainbow Dash immediately jumped into action and flew to save the most important of the party. Fluttershy. Which left only four of her other friends screaming bloody murder. However, luck was with them, for she then spotted three pegasi flying down to intercept the land bound missiles of flesh and earsplitting wails, allowing Rainbow Dash to circle around and catch her last friend.

Luck then decided to show everypony that she had brought her closest sister, Alas, for it was then that Rainbow Dash spotted a Gryphon zeroing in on the outside pony. Rainbow Dash vowed to give Luck a buck in the teeth for bringing such an unwanted guest when all this was sorted out. But first, she needed to save Twilight.

Going so fast that she very nearly did a Sonic Rainboom and definitely cemented Fluttershy into a shock induced frozen state, Rainbow Dash quite quickly dropped Fluttershy on the bit of wood that was still connected to the ship, then flew back. She then pretty speedily flew towards Twilight passing the rest of her friends being carried by pegasi on the way.

She flew faster and faster and faster.

But not fast enough.

The gryphon snatched Twilight seconds before Rainbow Dash rocketed by where Twilight wasn't anymore. “NO!” And a string of curses I shall not repeat left Rainbow Dash's mouth. But it didn't do much good for it was snatched away by Wind, the blackguard.

Twilight, on her part, was not aware of her current predicament. Until she looked at her savior and saw not the rugged handsome face of one of the sailors, nor the confident smirk accompanied by a blue face, but a beak.

Now Twilight, you might know already, for all her smarts and brains, didn't work well under pressure. Sure she had just been saved what would have most definitely been a very messy end, but she was still in the middle of a battle. So when she saw that beak, it took her several tries ( a squid? A parrot? A flamingo? A Triceratops?) before realizing that she was looking at the beak of a gryphon.

This didn't sit well with Twilight.

She had however retained enough of her smarts to realize that flailing her legs about would not be in her best interest, so she did the next best thing. She screamed. Loudly.

“RAINBOW DASH! SAVE MEEEEE! THE GRYPHONS ARE GONNA EAT MEEEEE!” Mind you, Twilight was still under a lot of stress.

The whole 'Twilight gets eaten by gryphons' thing didn't sit well with Rainbow Dash either, but she was already going the her fastest she could without blowing the ships from the sky with a sonic rainboom. 'Damnation that gryphon is fast!' she cursed in her head, because cursing out loud would be rude.

So she decided to call him Squishy. Why? She didn't know, it just sort of came to her, like an epiphany from heaven.

She had almost caught up with Squishy, ready to tar and de-feather him, when she got a face full of fist.

A very familiar face full of fist. She quickly recovered from the fall, but when she looked up she saw something that made her blood run cold. “GILDA!?”

Gilda smirked.

“I'm surprised you recognized me. This armor hides me pretty good.”

“How could I not recognized you?! We were best buds in flight camp! And piracy? What the buck?”

Gilda shrugged and started to circle Rainbow Dash, while Rainbow Dash circled her.

“Eh, a job's a job. Plus, I enjoy it. Y'know, after you sent me packing I really got into a funk. monologuing helped a little, but I could barely keep my job. Then I lost it.”

“You went crazy? Wow, I'm sorry. Now this whole pirate thing totaly makes sense.” interrupted Rainbow Dash. Gilda's eye twitched. “Shut up twirly eyebrow!”

“What?”

Gilda roared and charged Rainbow Dash.

-----

Twilight saw the whole exchange and despaired as she and her captor flew farther and farther from Rainbow Dash and closer and closer to the pirate ship. Which meant she was finally getting a good look at Gryphon airshippery. It was big, bigger than the ship Twilight came on. It was black and had twenty cannons and a window in between each one, for archers perhaps, and Twilight could only assume the same was true for the other side. What struck Twilight as odd was that instead of an envelope, it had three wooden masts, and in the place of sails the masts each had four massive propellers, like Pinkie's strange flying device. Twilight had a hard time imagining an engine big enough to power such beasts of science.

She wanted one.

They touched down onto the deck and before anygryph could stop her she had zoomed into a door which she felt would be proper if it went below deck. However, she found out that the Gryphons were complete barbarians, as it led instead to what appeared to be the captain's quarters. Her assumptions were verified when she saw the captain,(She knew he was the captain because he wore a captain hat.) a large black gryphon with an eye patch, behind his desk drawing what appeared to be cartoons for little fillies between the ages of three and twelve that involved little horses.

She didn't give it a second glance as she shot at the captain. He was half way through drawing his sword when she reached him. “Is your engine steam or hoof powered? How did you treat the wood to stay together during flight without magic? Is your hull lined with iron to protect it from cannon balls? How are the propellers rotating without any obvious connection to your engine?” Her face was inches away from the gryphon captain's face when the door burst open and and several burly looking gryphons ran in. The captain quickly hid his drawings. “{WHY IS THERE A PONY IN MY ROOM!?}”

(Translated from it's native Gryphic into Equestrian by TransCo. 'We're multilingual!')

Thundered the captain at the guards as they captured the pony and muffled it, if only slightly. “{Sorry Commander. She is speedy little pony.}” “{Make sure it does not happen again, understood?}” The captain growled. The guard gulped. “{Understood.}” Said the guards as they left the room.

The captain glared so balefully at the door that the guards felt it through the wood. He waited a few minutes to make sure he would not be interrupted, then got out his drawings. “{Now, where... was... I... Ah yes! The Shoggoth called Smooze.}”

-----

After Twilight had been so rudely taken away from her new-found, if unwilling, fount of knowledge, she was quite roughly displaced into what appeared to be a brig. But she couldn't be too sure, that

ping-pong table looked very suspicious. And the pinball machine couldn't be trusted either. But what she saw next made her heart melt. An enormous bookcase filled to the brim with books she had never seen in her life.

She was in such a state of pure bliss, and the oddities of this ship (The captain drawing little fillies cartoons? In the middle of a raid?) had so thrown her, that she had completely forgotten all her closest friends were in mortal peril. But she was soon very rudely reminded of this when a cannon ball breached the hull, taking a bit of the floor and the bookcase with it.

The wind rushed in and she could now hear very clearly the battle. She caught a glimpse for just a second of the inside of the hull, filled with springs, wheels, and all manner of Gryphon machinery she had never seen. Then a metal plate slid over the hole, cutting off the wind and allowing Twilight's hair to rest, if in a style somewhat akin to that of a bird's nest.

She stared in awe at the self repairing wall, and was shortly given a few more examples. There had apparently been a break in the Gryphon defenses for two more cannon balls destroyed and utterly obliterated the ping-pong table and the pinball machine, respectively.

So now she was left with hard wood and cold metal. Where she was finally sunk in, why she was here, how she was here, and exactly what she could do about it. Nothing. This realization hit her like a brick. Unicorn magic didn't work outside of Equestria. Nothing. All her friends were out there, in the thick of it. She had seen this ship, there was no way the tiny passenger ship could beat this Gryphon battleship. A pirate battleship. Nothing.

The word echoed, again and again through her head, 'nothing, nothing, nothing.' almost driving her to madness. And then the tears. They fell hot and fast, searing Twilight's cheek and drenching her coat. She felt she was drowning in a boiling ocean wrought of Despair. Chained to a mount named Grief, burning under the sun. Not the loving, kind sun of Equestria, but an alien sun bent upon her destruction. A sun of False Hope. The ground opened and swallowed her. She was falling in nothing, towards nowhere.

She heard a door slam, and she was once again in her cell, She saw no sun and she felt no ocean. She caught herself hyperventilating, and she felt dizzy. Her mind was a tumultuous stew of memories never to be felt again, things never said. And now they never would be. Twilight didn't notice the gryphess until she cleared her throat, calling Twilight's attention. She looked up and saw Gilda, no longer in battle armor, but in loose fitting trousers and a shirt.

“Rainbow Dash sends her regards.” Gilda said. Twilight froze, only the worst scenarios playing through her mind. Gilda chortled. “Don't worry, she very much alive. A few scrapes and scratches.” She turned to walk away. “Wait!” Twilight exclaimed. Gilda didn't even turn. “What?” “W-why can't I understand the crew?” Gilda laughed a short, dead laugh and turned to look at Twilight. “And I thought you were the smart one.” She said, smirking. “W-well...”

“They're speaking Gryphic, I'm not surprised you don't know it. Most ponies like to keep as far away from Gryphons as they can get, including their language.”

Gilda tilted her head to the side, as if listening to something. “I gotta go. We'll be seeing a lot of each other from now on.” And she left. Leaving Twilight to her worries and feverish dreams.

-----

Twilight stood on the edge of a precipice, divided by a chasm of immeasurable depth from her friends. “Rainbow Dash! Help me across, I can't do it alone.” But Rainbow Dash turned her back on Twilight. “What would I wanna do with some lame-o egghead? Get over by yourself. Or, better yet, just leave.” Twilight was taken aback by Rainbow's words, and she took an involuntary step back.

“Why... why are you saying that?! You're one of my best friends! Pinkie, please, talk some sense into her!” Twilight said even as tears stung her eyes. “Sense? She's talking the most sense I've heard in my life! Who'd want a party pooper like you around?” Then Pinkie turned and walked away. Then Rarity, and Applejack. One by one until they were all gone.

She turned and saw Gilda. “Where are your friends now?”

Twilight screamed.

-----

Jorme had never really asked much from Life. He really didn't. Just a roof over his head and a family to love. And while he had expected a house in the city, a wife and chicks, he wasn't entirely disappointed with being a pirate. After all, he had a roof over his head (sorta), it payed well, kept him fit, and there was even a certain gryphess he had his eye on.

That isn't to say that it was easy. For instance, dealing with a screaming pony at 2:36 in the morning. He just didn't know what to do, was there a protocol for screaming mares? Was this a normal thing? Should he wake her? The walls down here were pretty thick so he had time to think. At last he decided to get a carrot from the kitchen (It wasn't as if anygryph would actually miss it.) and poke the pony with it until she woke, then give her the carrot.

Yes, he thought this was a good idea indeed. Ponies liked carrots, right? Of course they did. It didn't take long for the pony to wake, but the carrot didn't seem to calm it down any, except now the pony was sobbing instead of screaming. And while this would generally be categorized as an improvement, he felt this was more of a step back, as she was now crying on his shoulder.

If you asked anygryph if they understood gryphesses, Jorme would be the first to admit he didn't. And the female in question being of an entirely different species, Jorme was left doubly unsure what to do. He lifted his hand and started to slowly pat Twilight on the back in what he thought to be a very reassuring way. When he felt her go rigid he knew he was wrong, from the way she started shaking, very wrong.

Jorme squeezed his eyes shut, preparing himself for a verbal lashing only capable by women. But it didn't come. He felt the mare move away, so he opened his eyes to see. Like I said before, Jorme doesn't understand women of any species. What he saw only confirmed this. He saw the mare wiping her eyes and even smiling a little. “Sorry, I had a really bad dream. Thanks for that.”

There were few things Jorme prided himself on, one was the ability the swab the deck by skating on it with scrub brushes, another one them was getting a decent education, which included a scant understanding of the Equestrian language.

“Not worry, color pony. Evil dreams much common.” Twilight took a sharp breath and was once again right in front of him, her nose inches away from his beak. “You can speak Equestrian?!” Jorme started to slowly back away, not sure if women were this way or if this mare was crazy, but he nodded.

Twilight positively beamed. “Oh my Gosh! I have so many questions to ask! My studies have always been limited to Equestrian culture!” Jorme stared in pity at the small mare, and he just didn't have the heart to tell her he couldn't understand half of what she said.

“Okay! Um, um, what is your ruling system?” Jorme didn't have a very good poker face. “Oh... Do, you, have a king?” Twilight said, loudly and slowly, miming a crown on her head. Jorme's face lit up in recognition. “Yes king! King Diamond Beak third.”

Twilight silently let go of his grammatical error, realizing his understanding of the Equestrian language was crude, at best. But otherwise she was thrilled to learn about the Gryphons, though the circumstances could have been better.

The was silence for a few minutes, Jorme sitting, quickly getting bored, while Twilight's mind raced about all the things she wanted to know. But his next words stopped her cold. “Aren't you worried for friends?” He asked, and Twilight froze. “Of, of course I am! They're my best friends in the world! Why wouldn't I be worried?” Twilight sputtered.

Jorme shrugged. “I not know. Just, if I was captured, I would do all in mine own power to escape.” He then pointed in her vague direction. “You not look like you trying all in power.” Twilight laughed a short, humorless laugh. “I don't know if you've noticed, but my power doesn't amount to very much outside of Equestria.”

Jorme mulled this over for some time, Twilight staring at him, still incredulous at his comment. “I guess you really are small pony.” Jorme finally said before leaving. Twilight stared at him as he left, until he was gone. What he said confused her. Not only the fact that he pointed out that she was small, but seemingly his entire character flipped in the second he said that last comment.

That brought her mind to what he said before. 'Aren't you worried for friends?' She didn't even know why she thought about it. They were her best friends, of course she was worried. But, it's not like worrying helped any, right? Of course not. Besides, she saw her friends get rescued, so they didn't fall. So they were safe. Right?

'of course, Twilight. Why wouldn't they be?' Twilight froze. That didn't sound like her head voice. It sounded off, it had a strange warble to it. 'congratulations Twilight, you've gotten close before, but now you've really gone and done it.' “Done what?” She asked the voice. 'Why, you're mad. Crazy, loopy, flipped your lid, off the deep end, special.' Twilight was shocked, to say the least. “I- I'm not crazy! What would give you that idea?!”

'Well, for one, you're talking to yourself. Do you hear my little voice? Only you can.' “I'M NOT CRAZY!” 'Radical mood swings, check.' “That's not a symptom of psychological instability!” 'She yelled at the voice in her head.' Twilight's ears flicked back, cursing herself. “Then why do you sound like Discord?” She accused. 'Well, I guess since I'm you, I should know this one. I'm the side of you you never knew existed, or tried to forget existed, so in your mental breakdown I was given a voice that matched my personification. Your cr-aazy side.'

Twilight was silently fuming at herself. That was just like her, if she was going to have a mental breakdown and hear voices, of course her brain would match them up to ponies she knew. And Discord.

“How do I know your not the real Discord trying to mess with my head?” 'Sorry Twilight, he's completely right. He is the personification of your, uh, crazy side. Sorry.' Twilight growled in frustration. “Fluttershy, what are you doing in my head?” 'sorry Twilight, I'm, uh, your, your, repressed kind side.' "Fluttershy voice, you are in my head. I can hear you no matter how quite you are. And what do you mean repressed kind side? I'm nice, plenty nice!”

'Twilight, you were a book hermit for the majority of your life, I'm honestly not surprised you have a repressed kind side. And don't be so mean to Flutterside!' 'Aww, thanks Dizzy.' Twilight's eye twitched and she could feel her mane coming out of place. “No. NO! It's bad enough that I have to deal with voices in my head, You will NOT use pet names!”

'Sorry Twilight.' Twilight groaned and started to rub her head. “I just hope that you're all there are.” She said. 'Well there can't be too many others. I mean, honestly, how many ponies do you know?' Twilight slowly began slamming her head on the wall “Rarity, how could you betray me like this?” She groaned.