The sun was the brightest it had been in hours, and yet the air was blissfully cool. That was how Applejack knew that it was a good day.
She pulled an empty cart over the crest of a hilltop at a brisk pace, her golden bangs fluttering in a soft, soft breeze. She gazed everywhere around her, and she did so with a smile. There on the edge of Ponyville the forests had given way to the whim of autumn, their canopies melting away under swirling bands of amber, orange, and crimson. With every sweet afternoon gust, a flurry of leaves flew loose from their branches, flitting about like scarlet and gold lantern bugs in the air above Applejack's mane.
She took a deep breath, and her lungs were rewarded with cool thin air that excited every nerve in the mare's body. The soreness of countless days of apple bucking instantly dissolved, replaced instead by a felicitous wave of enthusiasm that threw her trotting body into a bounce. The wooden cart creaked and groaned behind her, but it felt light as a feather. As a flock of birds soared south overhead, Applejack listened past their shrieking cries, and she heard a grand hush settling over the landscape, as if the whole world was sighing lazily before retiring to the shadows for a long, cold winter.
"Hmmmm..." She inhaled and exhaled. Goosebumps formed along her orange coat, and she smiled into the changing colors on either side of the path, her nostrils tickled by the scent of fallen acorns and crumpled dry leaves. "Nothin' like a scenic trot home with an empty cart after a long day of sellin' harvested apples." She stiffled a long guffaw, helplessly smiling towards the clear blue horizon. "Shucks, that sounds downright lazy of me. Reckon I don't care." A chuckle escaped her rosy lips as she made her way around a bend in the path.
"Nnngh... Guh!" A female breath emanated from overhead. "Ughhhhh..."
Applejack skidded to a stop, instantly ripped loose from her pleasant reverie. "That grunting sounded like Twilight." She looked straight up, then plucked her hat off in a surprised gesture. "Land's sakes! It is Twilight!"
"Yeah, uh... hi, Applejack," Twilight muttered, her muzzle upside down... probably because her entire body was too. "I... uhm..." She flinched, grunted, and flailed, her lower body dangling like a lavender pendulum in a fork of gnarled branches twenty feet off the ground. "...yeahhhh."
"Reckon I've got plenty of questions to ask right now," Applejack said with a slight smirk. "Just not sure which one of them is the least stupid-soundin'."
"This. Isn't. Funny! Guhhhh!" Twilight flailed again, only managing to swing limply from the tree branch. Only now did Applejack see a satchel full of books dangling off a branch by the princess' side. "Ohhhh fiddlesticks."
Applejack raised an eyebrow. "'Fiddlesticks?'"
"Yeah," Twilight mumbled, her wings coiling and uncoiling. "I know it sounds weird, but since I became a princess I realized it would be unbecoming of me to curse."
"Uhhh... Twilight?" Applejack's face scrunched up. "You've never cursed... like ever."
"Well, there's no harm in making a good practice out of it!"
"And what's with gettin' stuck up trees?" The farm mare approached the trunk beneath her and tapped it. "Ya practicin' to speak the language of cats while yer at it?"
"Very funny," Twilight droned, her eyes thin. "If you really must know, I was trying to get home to the library."
"Heh, looks like ya landed yerself in the wrong tree."
"I know that! It's just that... unngh..." Twilight's cheeks blushed furiously as she gazed towards the sky "below" her. "It was such a beautiful day and I figured 'why not practice flying?'"
"Well, I sure do agree with ya on the 'beautiful day' part. But—shucks—sugarcube!" Applejack briefly frowned. "Didn't we talk about this? Ya made an agreement with Rainbow Dash to only practice flyin' when—"
"—when she's around to be my wingpony, I know, but she was off doing important things today—"
"The lazy filly's probably nappin'."
"—important things, and I've bothered her enough as it is as of late. I'm glad to have such a loyal friend, but I don't want to be a burden!"
"Reckon ya don't want to be a shiscabob either, but take a gander at yerself, won't ya?" Applejack chuckled. "Y'know how much Rainbow Dash loves showin' off when she teaches ya them flyin' ropes. I really, really think ya shoulda waited for her to give you a good tailwind, sugarcube."
"Yeah. Right. Lesson learned. Got it." Twilight frowned and flailed. "I'll write a letter to Princess Celestia about it later. As for now, I need to get down!"
"Would you like some help with that, darlin'?"
"Oh Applejack, would you please?" Twilight's voice rang sweetly as she put on violet puppy dog eyes. "The last thing I ever wanted to be was a klutz in the air! Quick! Before anypony sees me! I beg you!"
"No need for beggin', girl. I've got this." Applejack unhitched herself from the wagon and pulled a rake out from the back. "Just like Rainbow, I don't fancy leavin' none of my friends hangin'." She cleared her throat as another smirk struck her lips. "Be that literal or somethin' else proper..."
"Uhhhh..." Twilight squinted at the orange shape beneath her. "Just what in Starswirl's name are you doing, Applejack?"
"Mmmmf..." Applejack's teeth clenched over the rake handle as she swept a cluster of leaves into a thick pile directly beneath the alicorn. "We earth ponies may not have fancy wings or shimmerin' horns like the rest of y'all, but I don't really need to tell you that we make the grade by thinkin' with our noggins!" She finally finished making a huge orange-and-yellow bed and spat the rake loose. "Ptooie! Heh. Now that's more like it. Tell me, Princess, what time of year is it?"
"Uhm..." Twilight fidgeted. "Fall?"
"You betcha!" Applejack spun and bucked the tree trunk hard. Thud!
"Yaaaaaaaiiiie!" Twilight fell like a lavender anvil, landing in the pile with a splash of calico leaves. "Unf!"
"Yeeeha!" Applejack kicked her forelimbs and smirked. "Now how's that for a flying lesson?"
"Mmmmf-mmmf!" Twilight finished swimming through the debris. Her head popped out of the bed with two or three leaves punctured on her horn. "Okay, I have to admit, that was nicely done, Applejack." She blinked innocently. "But what about my books?" Just then, her satchel full of manuscripts fell down and ricocheted off her skull. "Owie!"
"Snkkkt—Heh heh heh heh..." Applejack slapped the ground and practically doubled over. "Glad you got a chance to use yer noggin' too, Yer Highness! Heh heh heh..."
Twilight rubbed her head, then fished around in the pile for her books. "Wow, you're in a good mood today, Applejack."
"Ohhhhh don't mind me, Twilight." Applejack smiled calmly as another breeze rolled over the two, scattering the leaves between them. "There's just somethin' about this time of year when the air finally cools down that sends my heart a'flutter. Maybe it's just us farmfolk; I don't know how ponies raised in the city go about enjoying the change in seasons."
"Well, we don't—not usually..." Twilight hissed and grunted as she tried "swimming" her way out of the leaf pile. Ultimately, Applejack leaned in and offered her a hoof. Twilight took it with a grateful smile. "Uhm... Ahem." She stood on even ground with the farm mare, fidgeting with her book bag. "Usually we just control the local weather with magic, and that includes the shift between Summer and Autumn."
"Well, that sounds plum borin', Twilight," Applejack said, though her ears instantly folded. "Erm... no offense."
"Hey! None taken!" Twilight brushed the last flakes of leaves from her coat, smiling subtly "Still, I remember this one trip I made to Cadance's Palace in East Canterlot when I was just a little filly. The manor was almost outside city limits, and the unicorns had less control over the elements there. It was in the month of October, and the air turned cool and crisp—"
"Ya mean like today?"
"Yeah!" Twilight grinned. "And it was the week before Nightmare Night, and I was getting all excited about it because it was going to my first night dressing up and getting candy in a place far away from my home apartment. And... oh, you don't want to hear me go on and on about that..."
"Shucks, why not?" Applejack smiled as she hitched herself back up to the empty wagon. "All my work is done for the week. I ain't got nothin' pressin' to do."
"I really need to get back to the library, though," Twilight said. "Since flying is out of the question, I could always teleport—" She instantly winced, rubbing her head where the bookbag hit her. "Ow... my horn..."
"I think ya shoulda given teleportin' a thought when you were hanging down all upside-down-like."
Twilight squinted through one eye. "I was afraid of materializing through a squirrel's nest or something..."
"Heaven forbid ya disturb the acorn nibblin' varmints." Applejack chuckled, then gestured back towards the wagon. "Hop in, Twilight. Yer body's probably still out of sorts from hangin' like that for so long. I'll give ya a ride home."
Twilight blinked. "You're serious?"
"I'm alive, I'm awake, I'm in a good mood, and I'm just so darn happy to be yer friend." Applejack winked. "And, if you must know, yes, I am serious."
Twilight nodded with an awkward smile. "Well, okay then." She climbed up into the wagon and sat down. Her breath gave a slight squeak of surprise as the vehicle rattled forward at a brisk speed.
"Hold onto somethin'!" Applejack sing-songed. "I never promised that this was gonna be like one of yer fancy Royal Stagecoaches!"
"I-I only rode in one of those once!" Twilight stammered as she found an even way to sit up. "And it was during the coronation, remember?"
"If I recall, you could barely stand to sit in that gul-darn thang for a full minute! I felt plum sorry for the Canterlot stallions who were pullin' it. Seems like they prepared their whole lives for that one moment."
Twilight blushed deeply, her hooves squirming along the edge of the wagon directly behind Applejack's flouncing tail. "Yes, well, I tried telling them that it wasn't necessary! I was wanting to gallop alongside you and the girls instead!"
"Reckon they couldn't hear you from all the singin'."
"Er... yeah..." Twilight bit her lip. "That..."
Applejack chuckled.
Twilight smiled and leaned over the edge of the wagon. "You always make these rounds, Applejack? You seem to have picked a very gorgeous, quiet part of town."
"It's only gorgeous cuz of how the day has painted it," Applejack said, breathing in another crisp breeze. "And if you must know, yes, I do take this route home from the produce market often. I've lived long enough in this here town to know where it's lest congested in the middle of the day."
"Where is everypony?" Twilight scanned the colorful horizon with squinting, violet eyes. "Seems a shame that no one would be outside, enjoying this fantastic weather."
"I'm sure they're all out here somewhere, just lost in the cool hush of it all."
"Oh! That reminds me!" Twilight smirked. "Are you going to head up most of the games and festivities for Nightmare Night this year?"
"Oh, you bet!" Applejack smiled over her shoulder in mid-trot. "Haven't missed a single year yet! Well..." Her face scrunched up. "There was that one October when I had the pony pox, but I still hung around in some faculty. Granny Smith took up the job while I sat in the wings."
"Weren't you scared of making other ponies sick?"
"Nah, I dressed up like a mummy so I wouldn't breathe on anypony. Heh heh heh..."
"How very clever," Twilight said with a smirk. "You and your family have been around for so long that I bet you think of everything."
"Darn proud of it too. Heck, the best part of Nightmare Night is when Big Mac stuffs this here wagon full of straw and gives everypony in town a good ol' fashion hay ride!"
"Jee..." Twilight leaned back, rolling her eyes. "How breathtaking..."
"Hey! None of yer sass!" Applejack chortled. "I don't care how many bed mattresses you can suddenly feel a pea through! Don't be knockin' tradition!"
"I'm glad to be given a seat on your wagon on a day like this—but how can a hay ride be the most 'exciting' thing on Nightmare Night?"
"Simple, sugarcube." Applejack upturned her nose proudly as she pulled the wagon along. "Take this moment—how tranquil and soothing-like it is—then multiply it by a factor of ten or some-such. Then throw a starry night over that and fill it with all sorts of ghouls and ghosts and other such spooks—"
"Okay okay, Applejack, I get it." Twilight giggled. "When you put a bunch of ponies in the back of a moving wagon with no control of where it goes on Nightmare Night, you have a marvelous recipe for 'relaxing' and 'frightening.'"
"Plus, it's traditional."
"Yes. Tradition. I got that part too." Twilight stared off into the colored trees drifting by. "I guess I've never really been all that much in touch with ritual, what with my coming from a city and all..."
"I figure you city folks have a whole heap of tradition."
"Okay. True. Just not me."
"Why's that, ya reckon?"
"What, besides the fact that I only ever did my 'living' through books from an early age?"
Applejack winced slightly. "Well, to each her own."
"No, that doesn't always apply, Applejack." Twilight sighed and leaned against the wagon's front edge. "I only have myself to blame in that regard. I could have 'lived' much sooner in my life. I mean really lived."
"Good thang fate dropped you in our laps, huh?"
Twilight smiled. "You girls mean so much to me. I know I've told Celestia time and time again that 'Friendship is Magic.' But I think it's more than that. Friendship is... is..."
"High?"
"What? Ew! No!" Twilight made a wretching expression.
Applejack chuckled.
"What I was going to say was 'liberating.' Friendship is Liberating."
"Ahhhhhhh..." Applejack slowly nodded. A few seconds burped by. "So, 'high,' then?"
"Ungh! You're impossible."
Applejack only laughed some more.
"I wish you knew what it meant for me..." Twilight sighed through a delirious smile, her eyes full of leaves and color. "That one night that I faced down Nightmare Moon. I felt so alone, so helpless. All of my knowledge about the Elements wasn't helping me one bit. But then you and the rest of the girls showed up, and I knew that I wasn't alone." She shuddered, her voice wavering slightly. "I knew that there was something special to living beyond books and magical studies. It was just a spark at first, but it grew into something bigger, and it threw loose the shackles to my heart that I didn't know were there."
"Whelp, sounds mighty liberatin' to me, alright."
"Yeah..." Twilight nodded and nodded again. After a few seconds, she smirked, "Still, I had a few Nightmare Nights worth remembering, even if my life was a great deal more stale and unexciting at the time."
"You mean long before you had a reason to get into tussles with hydras, changelings, and dragonequi?"
"Pffft." Twilight rolled her eyes. "Whatever. I'm happy to be here in Ponyville. Even if it does try to blow itself up every other weekend."
"Heheheh..." Applejack glanced over her shoulder again. "What was yer best Nightmare Night, ya reckon?"
"Well, just like I was telling you earlier!" Twilight remarked. "The week I spent at Cadance's!"
"Was that yer first taste of Royalty?"
"Well, it was before I moved into the Royal Wing with Princess Celestia."
"Shucks, Twilight. I gotsta say—for a mare who's lived almost her entire dag-blame'd life in fru-fru palaces, yer no more spoiled than freshly-baked bread!"
"Will you let me finish?!" Twilight growled.
"Oh, by all means, your worshipfulness."
Twilight rolled her eyes and said, "I had this one guest room upstairs in Cadance's place, and I had it all to myself. There was a window that faced west, and whenever I opened it, a cold draft blew through from the woods lining the mountain's edge of Canterlot."
"Doesn't sound like the most comfortable way to sleep."
"That's because... uhm..." Twilight blushed slightly. "I didn't do a whole bunch of sleeping."
"Wuh oh!" Applejack chirped to the winds. "Somepony was misbehavin' past bedtime! I'm shocked Cadance didn't tan yer flanks!"
"It's not like I gave her a reason to! Not... uhm... not really..." Twilight fidgeted. "Besides, is reading a bunch of books in the dark such a crime?"
"Well, I reckon not?"
"A bunch of scary books that a filly my age didn't have any true reason to get her hooves on?"
"I... uhm... er..."
"Heheheh..." Twilight brushed her violet bangs awkwardly. "Yeah, I guess I deserved to have gotten caught or something. Still, I wouldn't have given up those memories for anything."
"Oh really?"
Twilight nodded. "There were three or four nights in a row where I got away with reading after dark. I had a lantern that I kept under the blanket. It felt like making a little tent atop the bed. With the way the wind blew in through the window—heehee—I might as well have been camping outside. I read stories about headless horses, olden ponies, leathery-winged foalnappers, haunted lanterns, evil grasshoppers—the works!"
"Yeesh. That must have led to some nasty dreams."
Twilight shook her head. "Not really, no."
"No?"
"Blame it on a rational mind, but even after reading the most gruesome stories, I slept like a rock afterwards!" Twilight suppressed a giggle. "It helped when Cadance came to wake me up in the morning. She thought I had gotten a full night's rest."
"Why, ya little varmint, you!"
"Still, it was the most exciting Nightmare Night I'd experienced," Twilight said. "All of the costumers and wildly-dressed ponies on the night of festivities didn't scare me in the least, and I found myself just smiling at everything."
"Cuz ya had yer mind prepared...?"
"More like my imagination, but sure." Twilight closed her eyes, reveling in the cool, leafy breeze. "It's funny how I still get a pleasant chill from those memories today. On a week like this, when fall first hits, and the night falls dark and noisy with howling winds, and the sounds of all sorts of nocturnal animals get carried through the crisp, thin air—I feel this little twinge of... of fear."
"Fear?"
"Yes." Twilight reopened her eyes. "But it's a good fear, a fear that makes me think of nights where the blankets protected me while my foalish mind went to dark, dark places. And... and it was enchanting, Applejack. I have no better way of explaining it, but I get positively enchanted by weather like this, especially when night falls and my imagination gets to run wild along those chilly breezes."
"Now I know why you were so riled up during our first sleepover," Applejack chuckled. "Ya wanted really bad to tell a whizz-bang ghost story."
"Oh, you mean way back when?" Twilight chuckled. "That was during a summer thunderstorm, if I recall. But... sure. I guess that counts for something."
"Did somepony say a 'thunderstorm' is brewing?" an elegant voice rang through the trees. "With weather as exquisite as this?! Perish the thought! Are the town's pegasi daft?!"
"Uhhh..." Fluttershy's voice murmured.
"Oh, no offense, darling."
"Wuh oh," Applejack smirked as she pulled the wagon to a stop. "A wild Rarity appears!"
"Unngh!" Rarity rolled her eyes, tightening her scarf from where she and Fluttershy stood with a rolled-up picnic blanket at the side of the path. "There is certainly nothing 'wild' about me or my appearance! How could you ever suggest such a thing?!"
"I think she was simply making a joke, Rarity," Fluttershy quietly said.
"And a very bold one at that!" Rarity paused to squint at the empty wagon with a lone Twilight positioned within. "What brings you about these parts, Applejack? Is it alicorn harvesting season?" She snorted back a dainty laugh and squinted Fluttershy's way. "See? I can make a quip too!"
Fluttershy blinked, then gasped, "Oh! Yes! Verry... funny?"
"I can't speak nothin' about harvestin' alicorns," Applejack said with a tip of her hat. "Why, I've only ever bucked just one out of a tree." She smirked over her shoulder. "Isn't that right, Twilight?"
"Unnnnnnghhh..." Twilight squatted low, hiding her red face behind the wagon's edge. "Applejaaaaaaaaaaaack!"
"Heh heh heh..."
"You two seem to be in a good mood," Fluttershy said with a smile. Angel poked his fluffy head out from his owner's pink mane where he had been hiding. "What's the occasion?"
"Is there somethin' wrong with enjoying a bit of good weather for once, Fluttershy?"
"Uhm... no?" Fluttershy gulped and bowed away. "I'm very sorry for asking—"
"Perish the thought!" Rarity pulled Fluttershy back towards her side. "Applejack wasn't truly chiding you, darling. Now were you, Applejack?"
"Heck no! We're all friends here!" Applejack squinted. "Though it begs the question—just what are we all doin' here?"
"Why, like you, we were similarly enthralled by the beauty of this fabulous afternoon!" Rarity said. "So, we had ourselves a soiree out in the meadow. We had tea and biscuits; it was a truly delightful time."
"But Rarity..." Twilight sat up again. "We all thought you didn't enjoy nature!"
"Why, what do you take me for, Twilight?!" Rarity smirked proudly. "I'm a lady! I shan't allow myself to be defined by banal hatred for something as simple as the outdoors!"
Fluttershy said, "Sweetie Belle invited her friends over to the Boutique for a get-together." Angel let loose a squeaky laugh.
Rarity rolled her eyes, sighed, and growled, "A most noisy, and certifiably calamitous get-together. Ahem." She stood tall and resolute. "Still, I am endeavoring to be a good and mindful sister. So I practiced it today... b-by being Sweetie Belle's older sibling elsewhere."
"Plus, they were very good biscuits," Fluttershy said with a smile. "Especially with the butter that Pinkie Pie brought us."
"Oh, is Pinkie with you?" Twilight asked.
"She was..." Fluttershy craned her neck to look around the forested path. "But she hasn't come back after promising to fetch us some strawberry preserves."
"Fluttershy, darling, that was hours ago," Rarity groaned. "Pinkie should know better than to keep two of her closest companions waiting."
"I didn't mind." Fluttershy calmly shook her head. "I could almost fall asleep to this weather. It's just so... so..." She smiled with her eyes shut and fluttered her wings. "Mmmmm... so calm and peaceful."
"Good thing you didn't succumb to slumber," Rarity said. "Or else you never would have listened to me regale you about my latest fashion line being designed for Hoity Toity!"
Fluttershy blinked. "Your latest what for who?" Angel face-pawed.
"So, if yer picnic is all over and done with, then what are you two doing way out here?" Applejack asked, then pointed down a nearby hillside. "Downtown Ponyville's thattaway!"
"Applejack!" Rarity smiled. "Surely, a mare in such good spirits as yourself would agree that a day like this is best savored! Why would we hurry on home when there's still plenty of daylight left to warm our fair coats?"
Silence.
Twilight squinted and said, "You two got lost, didn't you?"
Rarity bit her lip. Beside her, Fluttershy nodded. "Ahem..." The pegasus nearly whispered, "Yes."
"Then why didn't you take to the skies to scout out your location, sugarcube?"
"Because... well..." Fluttershy dug at the ground. "My stomach was full of tea and biscuits, and I didn't want to make myself airsick. Also, Rarity can't carry Angel because she's allergic to fluffiness, and Angel hates heights almost as much as I do, and I can't have him tugging at my mane after all the bits Rarity and I spent at the Spa yesterday—"
"Stop! Just... stop it right there." Applejack gave a long-winded sigh, then smiled tiredly. "What are y'all waitin' for, huh? Hop right in."
"Oooooh!" Rarity cooed dramatically. "I thought you would never ask!" She pranced towards the back.
"This is very nice of you, Applejack," Twilight said as she offered Rarity a boost. Both mares then leaned over to help Fluttershy into the back. "I'm sure this is the last thing you expected to be doing on such a relaxing day as this."
"Oh, dun get yer tiara in a curl!" Applejack smirked. "I'm tickled pink to be helpin' ya gals find yer way home!" She started pulling the wagon, but tripped with a mock gasp. "But Heavens to Betsy, Rarity! Had enough biscuits with yer tea?!"
"Wha...—?!" Rarity's jaw dropped and her scarf nearly fell loose. "Hmmmph!" She folded her forelimbs while Twilight giggled beside her. "Why, I never!"
"Speaking of 'tickled pink,'" Fluttershy murmured as the wagon rolled along the windswept path. "I wonder if she's going to come back only to see that we're gone." Her ears drooped under Angel's tiny weight. "I don't want the mare to be worried sick!"
"Pinkie? Worried sick?" Twilight blew a chuckle out the side of her muzzle. "If Equestria suddenly had a shortage of cinnammon overnight, then perhaps we might witness the panicky side of Pinkamena, but I'm sure she's just off somewhere—getting distracted by some shiny thing or another."
"I don't think you give our beloved Pinkie enough credit, Twilight," Rarity said. "I suspect she simply got held down with some inexplicable task or another at Sugarcube Corner. You know how apt she's been to please Mr. and Mrs. Cake as of late."
"Uhhhhh..." Fluttershy blushed.
Rarity blinked at her, then grunted, "With baking, of course! My stars and garters, darling! You really need to stop listening to Rainbow Dash's brutish jokes!"
"I can't help it," Fluttershy said, lying on folded legs in her half of the wagon. "She forces me to listen to them."
"Fluttershy, nopony can force you to listen to jokes," Twilight said.
"Rainbow Dash does," Fluttershy muttered. "She says that I'm her 'special judge' for telling her which are the good jokes and which are the bad ones."
"And how does that work out?" Applejack asked to the air. "Huh?"
"I don't know. We've never made it through a session without Rainbow Dash tossing her book of jokes away with a grunt and flying off to kick a thunderstorm to bits."
"Well, it's a good thing you've got me to spend some graceful, quality time with," Rarity said, leaning over to nuzzle the pegasus. "And what other opportunity will I have to share of my latest business exploits with Hoity Toity?!"
"Er... yeah..." Fluttershy bit her lip, fidgeting. "Right..."
"How is the fashion scene going, anyways?" Twilight asked. "Is Autumn—like—a big deal or something?"
"Oh! That you would ask such a question!" Rarity gasped. "And yet you're a princess now!"
Twilight raised an eyebrow. "So what?"
"So what?!" Rarity leaned forward across the rattling wagon, gawking. "Why, Autumn has only the best line in equine fashion! The sweaters! The overcoats! The scarves alone could have novels written about them! Entire mesmerizing catalogues! Why, Autumn simply can't be beat when it comes to variety of ponywear!" She blinked. "Except for maybe Spring, darling. The Vernal season is a veritable boon of creativity, and it breathes life into the color green." She blinked again. "Although summer is also quite unique, what with its breathable materials and water-proof ensembles..." She tongued the inside of her mouth. "Hmmmm... and it's hard to top winter and the festive colors of Hearth's Warming. Oh, and the shawls are to die for."
"Soooooo..." Twilight smirked mischievously. "Sounds like Autumn isn't all that it's cracked up to be."
"Do not misunderstand the words I have to give!" Rarity patted Twilight's forelimb. "Besides, a fickle mind is... ehhh... s-simply a byproduct of eccentricity! And eccentricity is a necessary companion to genius!"
"If ya don't know, Rarity, just say 'I don't know,'" Applejack sounded off.
"Oh please, Applejack! You're the last pony who should be preaching to anypony about the complicated ins-and-outs of the fashion scene!"
"The hay are ya talkin' about? I'm just listenin' to ya ramble on like a dragon in its sleep! If that's what fashion is all about, then I want nothin' to do with its backwards mumbo jumbo!" She glanced behind her in mid-trot. "Shucks, Fluttershy! How do ya even manage to pay attention to Rarity when she's fillin' yer ears with all that garbly-gook?!"
"Say!" Fluttershy stammered, sweating nervously. "Do any of you ponies have any pleasant memories of Autumn?! Because I sure do!"
"Oh?" Twilight leaned over a pouting Rarity's shoulder. "Tell us!"
"Why, this one time, I carved a house for a family of mice out of a pumpkin!" Fluttershy said with a warm smile. "And I made a pie out of the leftover material so that Angel and his ferret friends could nibble on it!" A squeak echoed from above her head. "Okay, so maybe Angel nibbled. The ferrets were more... uhm... voracious."
"Well, those sound like some really sweet memories, Fluttershy," Twilight said.
"It's a lot better than that one time I had to negotiate peace between the gray squirrels and red squirrels about a war they were having over the Everfree acorns." Fluttershy gulped. "They ended up signing the contract with their own blood. I... uhm... I-I might have fainted."
"Oh." Twilight blinked, fidgeting nervously. "That's... uhm..."
"Pffft!" A voice cracked from above. "Darn squirrels. They get all the attention these days."
Applejack glanced up. "Hey, RD! What's up?!"
"Not much, AJ," Rainbow blinked down from where she hovered at an even pace with the wagon. "What's down?"
"How long have you been there, Rainbow Dash?" Twilight asked.
"Long enough to wonder what three grown mares are doing in your wagon instead of apples."
"Yes... well... uh... we're enjoying this fine weather, Rainbow Dash!" Applejack spoke to the air above her. "So don't go messin' around with yer weather-flyin' powers or nothin'!"
"Yeesh, AJ! Chillax!" Rainbow rolled her eyes. "What do you take me for, anyways? I only poop on parties when they're really lame!"
"Y'know, I've always wondered about infant pegasi flyin' overhead without bein—"
"So, why you harvestin' my best friends, AJ?"
"...Huh?"
Rainbow Dash grinned mischievously. "Is there a harvest for young mares that I don't know about?"
"What?" Rarity breathily gawked.
"Oh, I know this one." Fluttershy leaned forward. "The punchline is 'Saddle Green is made of ponies.'"
"Unngh! Fluttershhhhhy!" Rainbow Dash groaned and flew limply on flapping wings. "I never should have friggin' made you judge..."
"Don't mind us, Rainbow," Twilight said with a smile. "We're just enjoying a wagon ride, talking about past autumn experiences and fall fashion—"
"I was talking about fall fashion!" Rarity harumphed. "Everypony else apparently wishes to discuss bad jokes and the implications of pegasi potty-training."
"In other words, pretty boring by your standards," Twilight said, smiling up at Rainbow. "Don't let us hold you back from whatever it is you're doing."
"Pfft. You kidding? The sky's clear and there's not a single thunderstorm to be seen. You guys are the most exciting thing I've run into since sunrise."
"Well, in that case, would you like to join us?" Twilight smiled as she patted a spot between her and Rarity. "Come on in! The wagon's fine!"
"Heh. Noooooo thank you." Rainbow Dash hovered backwards with forelimbs folded. "Wagon rides are sooooo uncool!"
"Awwww, come on, sugarcube!"
"I'm fine right where I am!" Rainbow smirked. "Besides, there's no telling when a good cross-wind might show up! I'd love to show you some of the latest moves I've learned from the Academy!"
"Well, darling, we're simply pleased by your presence," Rarity said with a graceful smile. "That way we can all properly enjoy the beauty of nature together." Just then, an errant flock of loose leaves blew into her face. "Aaack! Pfft! Pflbllbllbtt! Horrid! Horrid! Caterpillars in my face!" She flailed and slapped at her muzzle. "There are caterpillars in my face I just know itttt!"
"Errrr..." Rainbow winced and glanced ahead of the wagon. "Yeahhhh..."
Applejack cleared her throat over the sound of Rarity's fussing. "So, Rainbow, you're off from the Academy this week?"
"Yup. Fall Break. It's pretty much like Spring Break, only a lot less kids are foaled eleven months later."
"You thinkin' about visiting your family up in Cloudsdale?"
"Heh. Naaaah. They know I'm doing okay. Besides, I'm waiting for the day when I get to wear a Wonderbolts uniform before I show up at their cloudstep again."
"Then what do you plan on doing for the next few days?" Fluttershy asked.
"I figured I'd just keep it real, y'know?"
"No... pfft-pfft..." Rarity brushed and brushed her muzzle "clean." "We don't know."
"Meh. Ya see what I mean? Autumn is so boring! So the trees get naked like it's the forest's first honeymoon. Big deal! Gimme a good spring when the dragons wake up from hibernation and I can outrace their flaming breaths! Zooom! Hah! Yeah!"
"Eep!" Fluttershy shrank down to the bottom of the wagon. "I-I suddenly don't like spring!" Angel sighed and gave her skull a light kick.
"Heh..." Applejack chuckled. "Reckon with yer head always flyin' high above the clouds, ya don't appreciate cool air like the rest of us."
"You kidding? I live in this kind of coolness all the time! It's what makes being so cool... cool!"
"Wow..." Twilight smirked. "What a riveting analogy."
"Yeah, well, I'll... er... anal your ogy if you don't... uhm..." Rainbow sighed. "Whatever. Sky's blank as a chalkboard on Columbuck Day. I've got nothing." He glanced aside at a bright blur soaring past her. "Hi, Pinkie."
"Heya, Dashie!" THUD. Pinkie landed in the middle of the wagon from a great height. "Look!" She smiled, her face covered with twigs and tree sap. "I got the strawberry preserves you guys wanted!" The thrusted a glass jar full of red goop into Rarity's face.
"Waaa-haa-haaa-haaa!" Rarity recoiled from the offering, her hooves flailing. "It... where... but... how..."
"So, ya guys heard about the Jammerwocky, right?" Pinkie grinned from ear to ear. "It's a lot like the Jabberwocky, only less copyrighted. Ahem." She juggled the jar in two hooves. "Well, I've heard tales about the Jammerwocky since birth, and I thought 'Neato, keano! If anybody's gonna have a bunch of strawberry preserves lying around, it's gotta be that fella!' So I went frolicking into the deepest, darkest part of the forest! And that's when I found..." She took a deep, deep, deep, deep, deep, deep breath. "The lair of the Jammerwocky!"
"Where's she going with this—?" Applejack started.
"Aaaaaand since nopony was at the summoning stone to meet me, I figured I would just solo the dude! So there I was—all alone with nothing but a sword—"
"A sword?" Twilight blinked.
"Okay, so maybe it was a really really really pointy stick! Anyways, I burst into the Heart of the Lair where strawberries are corraled into the slaughter! Suddenly, it smelled like toffey! Lo and behold, from across the way, I saw the Jammerwocky!"
"Smelled of toffey?" Twilight's face scrunched up. "You sure this was some deep, dark lair inside Everfree?"
Pinkie bit her lip. "Okay, so maaaaaaaybe it was Bon Bon's candy shop." She sighed, rolling her eyes. "And maaaaaaaaaaaaaybe the Jammerwocky kind of looked like an earth pony with a two-toned mane and wrapped candies on her flank."
"Pinkie Pie, darling, what on earth were you—"
"Will ya lemme finish?!" Pinkie Pie leaned forward. "I said, 'I've come for your finest jam, for my two filly friends are starving at a picnic most dire!' And that's when the Jammerwocky—"
"Bon Bon."
"Right. That's when she breathed fire at me! So, I deflected her hellish blaze with my mighty sword—"
"Your stick."
"—and dove in, ripping her entrails out and freeing dozens of little foals who had been sewn shut inside her since the Creation of the World!"
"Oh no!" Fluttershy gasped, covering her mouth with a pair of hooves. "You... y-you gutted Bon Bon!"
Pinkie Pie blinked at her. After a few seconds, she groaned. "Okay, so maybe I just went into Bon Bon's place, knocked over a pile of candy corn, and got chased out with a broomstick? I still got you this strawberry jam!" She winked. "I dropped four golden bits onto her countertop after the fourth time she whacked me over the head."
"Well... that is... uhm..." Rarity nervously took the pilfered jar in question with two shivering hooves. "Quite brave of you, Pinkie." She gulped. "Not to mention resourceful."
"But how come you're covered with twigs and tree sap?" Twilight asked.
"Oh, that?" Pinkie Pie grinned with her eyes shut. "I got mauled by a bear on the way over!"
"Uhhhhh..."
"So!" Pinkie Pie leaned up against the front of the wagon, bouncing and bouncing. "Where are we going?! Huh?! Huh?! Huh?!"
"Well, I figured I was carrying us all home," Applejack said. "But now with the lot of us here, I reckon we should make somethin' of it."
"Ooooh! Like a party!" Pinkie Pie spun on two hooves and struck a pose. "An autumn party!"
"Perhaps with less bears and..." Rarity delicately placed the jar onto the floor. "...biscuits. Ahem." She looked up with a dainty smile. "I am—how do you say it?—game!"
"I would love to join you girls for something," Fluttershy said with a sweet smile. The bunny rabbit angrily kicked one of her eyes shut. She smiled even sweeter. "And so would Angel."
"How 'bout it, Rainbow?" Applejack glanced up. "You wanna join, or...?"
"Heck yeah." Rainbow glanced at Pinkie Pie's scuffed and scraped body. "I'm suddenly no longer bored for some reason."
"Great!" Pinkie Pie pumped a hoof in the air. "We can talk about Autumn vacations gone by! Boy, do I have a doozie!"
"You have a vacation to recount?" Rarity asked, twitching slightly. "Though I shudder to ask..."
"Oooh! Yeah! Like this one time the Cake Family and I took a trip to upstate Neigh Canterlina! And then we—"
"Stop," Rainbow suddenly grunted. "Just... stop right there."
Pinkie Pie blinked, glancing aside. "But I was only going to share about how—"
"No." Rainbow folded her forelimbs, frowning. "Let's talk about something else."
Pinkie Pie scratched her fluffy head, then gasped. "Ohhhhhhhhhhhh!" She rolled her eyes and smirked, leaning in to squeak to the other mares. "Psssst! Don't take it personally. Dashie's just a bitter Tar Hooves fan."
"A bitter what?" Rarity asked.
"Dang it, Pinkie! Don't—Snkk!" Rainbow pulled at her mane. "Unnngh—Don't get me started!"
"Heehee! Somepony doesn't like Chapel Haaaay!"
"Look, just because we didn't make it to the Final Four last year doesn't mean you gotta laugh it up about the friggin' Buck Devils and—Ungh!" Rainbow Dash growled. "I swear, Pinkie! I'm gonna pull such a prank on you that you'll turn white and grow wings to fly for the hills!"
"Oh, wouldn't that be a surprise?! Heeheehee!"
"Oh, is this a hoofball matter?" Rarity asked in a droning voice. "I could care less about hoofball."
"I think it's cute how they wave those white towels over their manes," Fluttershy said with a smile.
"What?! It's not cute! It's showing true athletic spirit! And—" Rainbow Dash bonked herself in the head and waved her hooves. "No. No. I'm not going to get into it, all because Pinkie Pie likes to live under a bridge."
"Well, since I can't talk about Neigh Canterlina, why don't you tell us what you love about autumn! And don't say 'it's boring!'"
"Duh! The pranks!" Rainbow Dash smirked from above. "Right around Nightmare Night, it's always the best time of the year to scare ponies out of their wits!"
"Yes, Rainbow," Applejack sighed. "I think we all remember."
"What?!" Rainbow shrugged. "Come on! Where would the freakishness of Nightmare Night be without a little shock here or there?"
"I must admit, I do admire the theatricality," Rarity said as a gentle breeze hit them all. "Though, it's hardly Flankespearean quality, but—you catch my drift."
"Why, this one time, Gilda and I scared our substitute teacher so bad!" Rainbow let loose a squeaky chuckle and continued, "We convinced her that having a left throbbing hoof was a side effect of having cloud lice! So we followed her home and—sure enough—caught her shaving her mane. So we grabbed the hairs, glued them together, and hung them by the Flight School's front flagpost the next morning! Hah! Heh... okay, soooooo maybe it wasn't exactly the scariest prank, unless you count the number of hours Gilda and I had to spend in detention the next week. Ahem."
"Well, that was certainly... enlightening," Rarity said.
Fluttershy gulped. "There's such a th-thing as cloud lice?"
"Rainbow, for real!" Twilight exclaimed. "Why don't you come on down and join us?"
"Pfft! What? In the shame wagon? Uh uh. No thank you."
"Nothing to be shameful for!" Twilight smiled. "We like having your company and it pains us to see you exercise for no reason!"
"What, you mean these?" Rainbow pointed back at her perpetually flapping wings. "Do you even know who you're talking to?"
"I've always wanted to ask the question, but was always afraid of coming across as daft," Rarity said. "But why are you always hovering whenever we and the gals are together, Rainbow?"
"Yeah, sugarcube," Applejack remarked, glancing up from where she pulled the wagon. "You seem to like beatin' them wings an awful lot. What's with that?"
"Uhhh... there's nothing with that, Applejack. I just like hovering."
"Hovering?"
"That's right, fruit-flicker. Hovering."
"Ya have some beef with the ground or somethin'?"
"Huh? No!"
"What's the ground ever done to ya that you'd have to forsake it so much?"
"I... I d-don't hate the ground! I just... prefer the air, is all!"
"Actually, she used to be scared of the ground," Fluttershy said.
"Excuuuuuse me?!" Rainbow gawked.
"Well, it's true," Fluttershy remarked. Angel nodded. "Remember after we got our cutie marks? I tried to show you this place I had discovered with all these incredible animals and furry creatures."
"Yeah? And?!"
"You kept clinging to the cloud that we floated down on and you refused to let go!" Fluttershy turned and smiled sweetly to the others. "Pssst... Clouds aren't supposed to turn yellow."
"Heeheehee!" Twilight burst out.
"It... what..." Rainbow blinked, then frowned even harder. "No! Now you're just being dumb!"
"Ha ha ha!" Pinkie Pie doubled over. "'Don't huff the yellow clouds!' After all these years, I finally get it! Oh, pegasi humor is the... the... dampest!"
"If I remember, Rainbow Dash, you couldn't even touch dirt until high school," Fluttershy said with a slight chuckle. "I even drafted the plan to give you a bottle of sand. You recall? As gradual introduction?"
"Ha ha ha!" Applejack guffawed, making the whole wagon shake behind her. "Ohhhh, that about kills it! Rainbow Dash and her phobia of the ground! Whew-wee! No wonder y'all are always shirkin' farm chores whenever ya visit Sweet Apple Acres!"
"Awwwwwww..." Rarity cooed. "That sounds terrible and yet adorable all at once! Just imagine, a scampy young Rainbow Dash, afraid of putting her hooves on the ground." She turned towards Twilight. "Someone should write a story about it."
"Uhhh... actually, I think somebody already has..."
"I am soooo not afraid of the gr-ground! Look!" Rainbow Dash flew down and plopped her hooves into the soil besides the wagon trail. "See?" She bounced up and down for good measure. "Dirt on m-my hooves? Sand on my fetlocks?! You call th-this scared?!"
"Then why are ya stuttering, sugarcube?"
"Grrrrrrrr!" Rainbow's blue hairs bristled along her neck. "I know! I'll show you! Let's race!"
"Uhhh... do I look like I'm in the position to race ya anywhere?"
"No excuses!" Rainbow grinded her hooves against the earth. "Let's have at it! A muddy, gritty, earth-flinging hoof-race through this dank, dark earth! Oh! I know! I'll race you to the lake on the side of town!"
"Rainbow, darlin', please. There's no need for—"
"I'll show you! I'll show all of you!" Rainbow crouched low. "OneTwoThreeGo!" She sprang forward like a blue bottlerocket.
"Rainbow Dash!" Applejack waved after her, but it was far too late. The blazing pegasus was already beyond sight. "Darn it!"
"Oh well..." Twilight sighed, leaning back against the edge of the wagon. "So much for a quiet evening with all of us."
"It's my fault," Fluttershy said in a sighing tone. "I shouldn't have egged her on like that."
"Don't you fret yer pink head about it, gurlfriennnnd!" Pinkie Pie reached over to ruffle Fluttershy's mane beneath Angel's paws. "Rainbow Dash could use with some egg in her face from time to time!"
"I hate to rain on this delightful parade," Rarity spoke up, gazing skyward. "But I do believe it is starting to get dark."
"Is it really?" Twilight asked, gazing above the fluttering tree branches. "I hadn't even noticed."
"I guess time flies when you're having good conversation," Fluttershy said.
"Hey, Applejack, not to be an impatient alicorn or anything," Twilight said. "But perhaps we could step it up a bit? If we head straight into town, we should be able to make it by sundown."
"We could have dinner at Sugarcube Corner!" Pinkie Pie beamed. "We could share the spoils of the Jammerwocky over toast and pumpkin pie!"
"Oh, I do very much like the idea of that," Rarity said.
"Uhm... right..." Applejack muttered, suddenly squinting at the path ahead of her. "That... c-can be arranged..." She gulped. "I think."
"Is something wrong, Applejack?" Fluttershy asked.
"Oh, no, not really. It's just that..." Applejack sighed. "I think I may have gotten a bit distracted from all the talk of Tar Hooves and strawberry preserves and ground phobias."
"Distracted?" Rarity glared. "Don't you mean 'lost?'"
"Errrm..." Applejack breathed in long and hard. "Eeeyup."
"Hah!" Rarity flung her hoof forward over Pinkie's cowering head. "Let she who is without sin cast the first sewing needle!"
"I'm not used to this happenin', to be perfectly frank," Applejack said. "Especially in my own backyard. Shucks."
"Why?" Pinkie Pie grinned. "Can't you be perfectly Shirley?" She slapped her own knee. "Heeheehee!"
Twilight shook her head. "I don't get it."
Fluttershy sighed. "I did..."
"I know my Element of Harmony ain't 'humility,' but still..." Applejack glanced over her shoulder. "Any of y'all mind givin' a silly pony a helpin' hoof?"
"What, as in a direction to take?" Twilight asked.
"Yes. We've got ourselves a fork in the road up ahead."
"Oooh! Oooh!" Pinkie bounced, pointing forward. "Go left! Left!"
"Which left?"
"The leftiest of left!"
"There are only two lefts, darling. Stay it right."
"... the lefter left?"
"Unnngh..."
"Yer really certain that's gonna take us to town the quickest?" Applejack asked.
"You betcha!" Pinkie Pie rocked back and forth with a proud smile on her face. "We wanna get back home before sundown, don't we?"
"Well, yeah, but—"
"Foolish mortal! The Jammerwocky's loot waits for nopony!"
"...Huh?"
"Just go ahead and take a left, Applejack," Twilight said with a faint smile. "She knows this town almost as much as you do."
"Well, reckon so." Applejack grunted slightly as she pivoted the wagon to the left and took the furthestmost path. "She's lived here almost as long as me."
"Besides..." Twilight nodded towards the others. "I've discovered that it's best not to argue with 'Pinkie Sense.'"
"I am prone to agree," Rarity said with a nod. "After all, it's not like Pinkie Sense stands to compete with tried and tested science or rationality—"
"Awwww shoot!" Applejack suddenly grunted as the ground gave way beneath her hooves. Around a sharp bend, the trail had slanted by a startling sixty degrees down a thickly wooded slope. "Awww shoot! Awwwwwww shoot shoot shoot shoot shoot!"
"What what what what what?!" Fluttershy stammered.
"Pinkie?!" Applejack snarled, planting all four hooves firmly into the ground in a desperate attempt to grind the wagon's inevitable plunge to a stop. "What in tarnation is the meanin' of this?!"
"Eh heh heh..." Pinkie gulped and gestured nervously. "I told you this would be a fast way..."
"I wanted swift! Not plum suicidal—Aww horseapples!" She let out a yelp as her hooves slipped. The wagon bucked back and forth like a see-saw, flinging Applejack loosely up and over. "Whoahhhh!"
"Gaaaiee!" Twilight and Rarity dashed to opposite sides of the wagon as Applejack landed in between them.
"Applejack!" Rarity shrieked.
"Nnngh... Hello, Rarity."
"What are you doing inside the wagon?"
"Tryin' to get my gul-durn bearings. Why?!"
"Uhm..." Twilight nervously stirred. "Perhaps a better question is what are you not doing outsideof the wagon!"
"Huh?" Applejack tilted her head up and gasped as a gust of wind blew at her freckled cheeks. "Hold onto somethin', girls!"
Everypony shrieked as the wagon plunged downhill, rolling at a blazing thirty miles per hour... forty miles per hour... fifty...
"Woohooo!" Pinkie Pie cheered as branches and leaves whizzed past them down the narrow, winding path. "This is longer than Norweigh!"
"Pinkie, for Celestia's sake!" Twilight sputtered amidst the whipping winds. "Keep your head down!"
"Never mind that!" Fluttershy had curled up into a shivering ball by this point. Angel clung to the pegasus' ears, holding on for dear life. "Put it between your forelimbs and cover your skull!"
"Aaaa-aaaahaaah!" Rarity orated.
"Now, nopony panic!" Applejack grunted as she fumbled towards the edge of the wagon. "T'ain't a problem that Bucky McGillicutty and Kicks McGee can't solve—" Just as she was about to climb over, a dangerously low hanging branch swooped by, slapping hat clean off. Her green eyes shrank and she squatted low in the runaway vehicle, gulping. "Alright, everypony panic."
"Aaaa-aaaaa-haaaa—Ulp!" Rarity went cross-eyed from a lavender hoof clamping over her mouth.
"Don't worry, everypony!" Twilight shouted as the wagon bumped and jolted in its death plunge. "I'll get us out of here! I am an alicorn, after all, and having perfected the art of magic through a trial of fire and tribulation—"
"Mmmf—" Frowning, Rarity plucked her friend's hoof loose. "Ptooie! Less monologuing and more might, darling!"
"Right! Teleportation spell, coming up!" Twilight's horn began to glow.
"But Twi!" Applejack shouted above the clatter. "Them books fell on yer horn somethin' fierce earlier! Are you sure that—"
"It's either this or get smashed to bits like pumpkins!" Twilight retorted.
"Hey!" Pinkie grinned and shouted above the tumult. "Siamare's Dream! I love that album!"
"Twilight! Please!" Fluttershy squeaked "Hurry!"
"Here goes!" Twilight took a deep, deep breath and shot a beam of lavender light out of her horn.
Angel gulped, muttered something unintelligible, and pounced clear of the wagon's edge at the last second.
FLASH!
The air and noise was gone. All five mares found themselves once again beneath a rosy afternoon sky. Everything was still.
"Is... Is it over?" Rarity glanced up, shivering.
"Twilight!" Applejack grinned. "Well I'll be! It worked!"
"You see, girls?" Twilight sat up, dimming the light from her horn. "All it takes is some peace of mind and—Gaaaaaie!" She and the entire wagon plummeted.
"Daaaaah!"
"Aaaaaaugh!"
"Eeeeek!"
"Weeeeee!" Pinkie's voice was cut off—as was everypony else's—when the wagon struck the surface of the lake that it had inadvertently materialized over.
All five mares splashed and treaded water, sputtering for breath.
At the every edge of the shore behind them, a blue pegasus skidded to a stop, breathless.
"Hah!" Rainbow Dash was a panting, sweating mess. "Scared of the ground, huh? Well I sure showed them who's boss—!" She froze in place, blinking at the five bodies wading in the lake in front of her. "Awwwwww darn it!"
"Yaaay! Heeheehee!" Pinkie cheered between a glaring Rarity and Applejack. "Let's do that again!"
"Uhm..." Fluttershy shivered as she waved at the disant white speck of Angel along the treeline. "Let's not?"
"Guhh!" Twilight splashed to the surface, gasping for breath. "Girls! I need h-help! Have any of you ponies s-seen my books?" She twirled about, then blinked. "Oh look! A lake house!"
Author's Note
F'naaa. I'm going to Burger King
