Fulfillingby PegasusMesaChaptersForeword, by Princess CelestiaCh 1: In Which Luna Kicks Flank, Fluttershy Enjoys Life, and Twilight SchemesCh 2: In Which Luna Frets and Fluttershy Goes Temporarily InsaneCh 3: In Which Fluttershy Quakes, and Luna is Terrible at Naming ConstellationsCh 4: In Which Rarity Makes a Decision, and Discord Trolls HardCh 5: In Which Fluttershy Dates, Luna Rages, and a Wild Plot AppearsCh 6: In Which Fluttershy is Comforted, Luna Pursues, and Discord Dispenses JusticeCh 7: In Which Fluttershy Has a Revelation, and Luna Has an ArgumentCh 8: In Which Pinkie Returns, Fluttershy Avoids Talking, and Luna Gets Overly DepressedCh 9: In Which Luna Meets Phineas, and Pinkie Uses a BrickCh 10: In Which Luna Despairs, the Elements Fail, and a New Challenger AppearsCh 11: In Which Celestia Takes Charge, Discord Presents a Plan, and Fluttershy ConfessesCh 12: In Which Battle is Joined, Fluttershy is Saved, and Noggins are WhackedCh 13: In Which Fluttershy is a Badflank Motherclopper, and Luna Meets an Old Friend(Extra) Ch 14: In Which the Plot Thickens, Luna is Asked to Dangle, and Sexual Jokes are Made(Extra) Ch 15: In Which Rarity's Plan Almost Backfires, and Celestia Reveals Her Bad Side(Extra) Ch 16: In Which Twilight is Pushed Too Far, and Fluttershy Touches a Pussy(Extra) Ch 17: In Which Celestia Makes a Difficult Decision, and Rarity Springs Into Action(Extra) Interlude: In Which Discord Helps in the Most Annoying Way PossibleForeword, by Princess CelestiaGreetings, dear reader and loyal subject. It was with great pleasure that I accepted when asked to write the foreword to this wonderful work. It is a joy for me to contribute to the success of any pony, and as I count the author as one of my dearest friends, I very much believe that—Okay, my advisers have informed me that nopony ever reads past the first two lines of these things, so if you're still with me, congratulations—you get to read the real foreword. Being a princess can really grind on your nerves; it's just one PR moment after another. It's all smiles, and grace, and kind words, and tolerance, and sometimes I get so bored I want to drill my horn into a wall. However, since that would both take time to do and ruin a perfectly good wall (not to mention probably hurt, quite a bit), I'm going to instead take the opportunity to vent through this, one of the most passive-aggressive mediums available to me. First of all, do you know how much the author is paying me to write this foreword? Twenty bits! Twenty! Not two hundred, not two thousand—twenty. That's a two followed by a single zero! I know that artists are normally strapped for funds, but for pony's sake, come on! Twenty bits can barely get you a good hooficure these days! Trust me, our kingdom could really use a bit of pocket change right now. Do you know what Equestria's tax laws are? Of course you don't, because we don't have any. Zippo. Zilch. Living here is duty-free! Hooray! The one source of income we have is through doing little side-jobs, like writing forewords for ungrateful, twenty-bit-paying authors. The only reason our government isn't completely broke right now is because I have Twilight Sparkle and her friends to take care of the big problems—it really saves money, and she does it for free, every time. I'm actually starting to feel a little bad about it, now that I mention it. Anyway, my point is, the author—what a jerk, am I right? Secondly—and here I'm going to be blunt—I personally think this work is awful. When I accepted this job, the publisher sent me a manuscript that I could read as a "preparation". Ha! What a joke—nothing could prepare me for what was contained within those pages. Now, I'll be fair—I've heard of "shipping" and I've seen a few examples of what it can produce, and some of them are just disgusting. Like, bleach-your-eyeballs-to-cleanse-them levels of disgusting. This one isn't, and for that, I must be thankful. You know, credit where credit is due. However, the rest of this horrendous, so-called "story" is melodramatic, poorly written, grammatically unsound, devoid of characterization, and all manner of simply terrible things. It's like a laundry list of all the awful atrocities that would happen if King Sombra had been born as an irate editor with a grudge against the world of literature. If I had ever written something this miserable, I would have burned it immediately upon completion, and then I would have summoned a priest to exorcise whatever demon would have inevitably spawned from the ashes. I would even kiss Discord before I allowed a story like this to see the light of day. By the way, if you tell Discord that I wrote that, I will personally hunt you down and end you (and probably loot your wallet, as well—remember, Equestria's poorer than a diamond dog in the desert). And Discord, if you're reading this, no, that is not an invitation. I'm serious. Bring this up at your own risk. You have been warned. Thirdly and finally, I really have to question the author's source of information. I'm not going to spoil anything important (not that it really matters, it's pretty "spoiled" already, if you get my drift), but Luna is presented as more powerful than I am, in terms of raw magical- and physical- strength. To that I must say—what a load of crock! I mean, sure, she could probably take me if she's having a good day, but it would be pretty darn close. And it's not like I've been spending the last couple centuries embroiled in warfare—things have been pretty peaceful, so of course I'm going to be a little out of shape! Send me to the moon for a thousand years and let me toughen myself up with a time-skip and a training montage, and I'll kick some epic flank when I get back, too. Right now, Luna's reading this over my shoulder while I write it, and even she's nodding her head in agreement with me. Unfortunately, I think she's also starting to get some ideas that I don't care for—she keeps flexing her muscles and throwing me challenging glances out of the corner of her eye. I might have to take her out to the training yard and show her that the whole "Chrysalis beating me" thing was a fluke—you know, just so that her head doesn't get too big. For the sake of any readers who have made it this far and would like all of my points to be presented in an easy-to-read list format (you know who you are, but mostly I'm looking at you, Twilight), here they are: I am being underpaid in an almost-criminal fashion I could sneeze on a piece of blank paper, and it would be a better story than this one The author is either very deluded or really, really dumb Anyway, I'm currently being told that, every now and then, the editor will read the last sentence of a foreword, just to make sure that it's not sarcastically critical of the proceeding work, so I'll have to end the real thing right here. Thank you all so very much for reading this fantastic piece of literature, and I hope that you enjoy it greatly—I know I did! Yours Sincerely, Princess Celestia Ch 1: In Which Luna Kicks Flank, Fluttershy Enjoys Life, and Twilight SchemesCh 1: In Which Luna Kicks Flank, Fluttershy Enjoys Life, and Twilight Schemes "Um, Luna, I don't feel totally comfortable with this..." "Nonsense! This is but a fun little spar! There shall be no lasting harm done." At those words, Twilight Sparkle, one of the alicorn princesses of Equestria, raised her eyebrows. "No lasting harm?! What do you mean by no lasting—" "Have at thee!" The other alicorn present, Princess Luna, smiled widely as she pushed off the ground in a single, mighty leap and cast a spell with practiced ease. She took aim at her opponent and released from her horn a tiny spark that grew larger and larger as it traveled. By the time it reached its target, the spark had become a boulder-sized ball of energy. Twilight yelped and teleported herself out of harm's way a mere instant before the spell struck the ground and detonated. Both mares were blinded by the explosion, and when their eyesight returned to them, there was a giant crater where just moments before Twilight had stood. "Luna!" she said, voice shaky. "Do you have any understanding of the concept of 'self restraint'?" "I know not of what thou speakest," the princess of the night replied. "Dost thou claim thyself to be unfit to proceed?" "Not exactly, but—" "Then we continue!" Luna lunged forward, horn leading the way. With a deft twist of her head, Twilight's own horn deflected the attack, and she took the opportunity to retreat while casting an enchantment that left a slick puddle of grease in her wake. Luna wasn't tricked, however, and so instead of charging and losing her footing on the slippery surface, she chose to take to the skies. "Why are we doing this again?!" Twilight shouted as she dodged a bolt of conjured lightning. A second bolt was blocked by a magically-summoned shield. "Thou seekest a reason to engage in friendly combat?" the darker mare asked. "'Tis not enough to desire to test thyself against a worthy adversary?" "I prefer my tests to be less... dangerous, I guess?" The younger princess sighed and shook her head. "Whatever, if this is the way you want it..." Her horn lit up and she sent a wave of magical arrows arcing towards her opponent. Luna gracefully spun through the air, avoiding every last one of the projectiles. The princess of the night summoned a gigantic, purple, glowing hammer in front of her, and swung it downwards; Twilight's eyes grew wide as the monstrous mallet descended. She only barely managed to conjure another magical shield in time to avoid being flattened. "Luna..." she grunted through gritted teeth, straining against the weapon that bashed repeatedly against her barrier. "How...much... longer...do...I...have...to...do...this?!" "Oh, very well," Luna snapped. She reached up a hoof and flicked her horn, and the hammer disappeared instantly. Twilight released a pent-up breath. "Thank you!" she gasped as she wiped a bead of sweat from her brow. "I don't think...*pant*... don't think I'm the right... *wheeze*... right pony for this." A disappointed expression crossed the dark princess's face. "We suppose We were a bit... hasty... in arranging this duel." She sighed while she looked Twilight over for any injury. "Art thou in good health? I did not inflict any dire injury upon thy body, did I?" "I'm fine, don't worry," Twilight said, waving the princess's concern away. "Just a bit... tired. Also, um... you're talking in the old-style again." "I beg thy—your—I beg your forgiveness." The purple alicorn used her magic to levitate some water from one of the garden's ponds, and began to sip it daintily. "If you want to get exercise so badly, why not arrange for a few of the guards to spar with you?" "The guards still fear Nightmare Moon enough that they would refuse such a request." "Surely there must be somepony who would be a more appropriate opponent than me!" Luna turned away to hide her somber expression. "Twilight, thou art—shoot, I mean, you are the only pony that I could ask. That is, I don't have any other..." "'Any other' what?" The dark alicorn muttered something inaudibly. "Sorry, could you say that again?" Twilight asked. "I don't have any other friends!" Luna said in an embarrassed tone. "Aside from Celestia—who absolutely hates this sort of thing—you're the only pony to truly reach out to me!" She sniffed and wiped her eyes. "Oh, Luna, I'm so sorry," Twilight said, placing a hoof on the other mare's shoulder. "I didn't mean to make you cry—" "I'm not crying! I am a warrior, and warriors do not cry!" "But there are tears—" "It's sweat! You see sweat!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ An hour later, Twilight was flying home to her library in Ponyville, thinking hard on the state in which she had left Luna. That poor mare, after all this time I'm still the only one besides her sister who will spend time with her... She tilted herself to the side in order to dodge a goose that wasn't paying any attention to where it was going. "Honk!" it honked in honk-like apology. I wonder if there's anything I can do to help her out. I bet the girls will give me a hoof with this—I'm sure they'll be happy to help. Well, except for maybe Fluttershy— she's probably still terrified of Luna. Dang, this isn't going to be easy. A plan began to form in the purple mare's mind, one that would hopefully accomplish the task of finally getting Luna some new friends. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Go on! You can do it! I believe in you!" Fluttershy stood in her kitchen, watching while Angel Bunny gripped a tiny barbell. He flexed his muscles and pulled as hard as he could. "Almost there! Go, Angel, go!" she cheered. With what appeared to be a monumental effort, the bunny lifted the weight proudly over his head. "Yay!" Angel dropped it to the ground, where it landed with a barely audible *thud*, before he flexed once more and kissed his biceps. "Alright, Angel, go wash up and I'll prepare a nice lunch for mommy's big, strong bunny." He scowled at her and tried to hide a blush before hopping away to soak in his pint-sized bath tub. The pegasus hummed a cheery tune while she got started on the task of making her favorite animal's favorite meal (although if she was asked, she would most certainly say that all animals were her favorite). "Ah..." she said. "Bright sunlight, perfect temperature, and all my friends..." If every day was like this... I think that would be wonderful. A hoof pounding on her front door frightened Fluttershy from her thoughts. The ruckus continued until she opened the entryway and peeked around the edge. "Wh-who's th—oh, Twilight?" The purple alicorn was running in place, wings spread and a frantic look on her face. "What can I—" "No time!" Twilight exclaimed. "My place! Meet! Thirty minutes! Thanks a lot, see you then!" With that, she was gone, galloping away as quickly as her legs could take her. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "...so that's basically, it," Twilight concluded. "She's really really really lonely, and I can't just leave things the way they are! I have to do something about this!" "Wait, that's just stupid," Rainbow Dash said after a moment of thought. "She's a princess! Can't she just, like, order somepony to be her friend?" "Use your noggin for once. Ya should know that ain't how it works." Applejack turned her glare from the brash pegasus. "But Twi, Ah don't get what ya want us to do. Ah mean, the rest of us barely even know the mare." "Isn't that exactly the point Twilight's trying to make?" Rarity asked. "The poor thing doesn't have any friends, and it's all because nopony has truly gotten to know her!" "Yep, Rarity's absolutely right!" The unicorn beamed at Twilight's confirmation. "And I know that if you girls spend some time with the princess, you'll like her just as much as I do!" "Oh, fine," Applejack groaned. "What do ya need me to do?" Twilight pulled out a calendar and held it up for the other mares to see. "Right before you all got here, I invited her over for the evening to have some girl-time," she said with a grin. "I just need you all to be here!" The look that Rainbow gave her was decidedly wooden. "Let me get this straight. You invited us over here now, so that you could invite us over here tonight." "Well when you say it like that, it sounds stupid, but...c'mon, what do you say? Will you do it?" Applejack immediately shook her head. "Sorry, no can do. Big Mac and Granny Smith are goin' out, and Ah need to be at the farm to take care of Apple Bloom and her friends. Ah'd bring them here, but that probably ain't the best idea... Ah don't think you want to drive the princess nuts." "And I've got a bit too much on my plate this evening," Rarity added. "I apologize, but I must also decline. In the future, however, I would be more than happy to help." "And Pinkie's out doing... something..." Twilight said. "Who knows what she's up to... Rainbow, Fluttershy, I can count on you two, right?" Her eyes were almost pleading. "When you say 'girl-time', you mean mane-braiding, and gossiping, and stuff like that?" Rainbow asked, causing the alicorn to nod hopefully. "Nope, that's not my scene." With that, she was out the window in a flash. All eyes settled on Fluttershy, who had been sitting silently, as per usual, listening in on the conversation. And so we get to the pony who least wants to do this. "Fluttershy, please," Twilight begged; she dropped to her belly and grabbed the pegasus's legs. "You're my last hope!" "B-b-but isn't she l-loud and sc-sc-scary?" Fluttershy asked, trembling at the mere thought of the lunar princess and their last encounter. "I d-don't think I can..." Her voice trailed off when Twilight's eyes grew large and watery while her lower lip trembled. It was enough to break somepony's heart. "My my, you've been practicing your puppy-dog expression," Rarity commented. "I can see my lessons haven't gone to—" "Rarity," the purple mare said flatly as the moment fell apart. "C'mon, Fluttershy, she's a good, honest pony. And she's not really that loud anymore! I promise, it's getting better!" The pegasus didn't appear to be convinced, and Twilight's face fell. "Alright... I'm sorry to have pressured you. I'll send her a letter to let her know not to come..." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ That poor pony's going to be very disappointed, a voice said in Fluttershy's head. It sounded suspiciously like Iron Will, the minotaur that had once had a hand in teaching her to be more assertive. But... I'm certain she doesn't want to spend time with me—not with stupid, scared Fluttershy! The yellow mare grimaced inwardly at the words she used to describe herself. Twilight had picked up a quill and parchment and was busy scribbling a note. You never know until you try. Plus, you could be her second friend! The second friend she has in the whole world! Fluttershy watched as Twilight finished the letter and began to roll it up. But I'll probably mess things up, and make her feel worse than she did before... Don't be so negative! Who's the nicest pegasus in all of Equestria? ... I SAID 'WHO'S THE NICEST PEGASUS IN ALL OF EQUESTRIA'? ...I am? Is that a mosquito I hear, buzzing in my ear? SPEAK UP! I'm the nicest pegasus in all of Equestria! C'MON, PANSY! TELL THE WORLD WHO THE NICEST PEGASUS IS! "I AM!" Fluttershy yelled, using her indoors-voice. F*yay!* YEAH YOU ARE! "Fluttershy?" Twilight asked, just about to place the letter into Spike's clawed grip so that he could send it to Canterlot. "Did you say something?" "Oh." The pegasus coughed delicately. "Uh, yes. Twilight, I'll definitely be there tonight!" Her sudden courage immediately fled and she cringed backwards. "If that's alright with you, I mean..." "Yay!" the alicorn cheered, throwing the letter away and leaping forward to hug her friend. "Thank you thank you thank you thank you! The princess will be so happy! I promise, you won't regret this!" Ch 2: In Which Luna Frets and Fluttershy Goes Temporarily InsaneCh 2: In Which Luna Frets and Fluttershy Goes Temporarily Insane I am immediately regretting this, Fluttershy thought later that day as she tried to sort out what she should do to prepare for an evening with a princess. "That's silly," she said to nopony in particular. "I don't need to be worried at all! I'm around Twilight all the time, and she's a princess." That's true, but you knew her before she was a princess, too, her mind responded. "Well, yes, but—" And you don't even know Princess Luna in the first place. "That doesn't—" And aren't you supposed to be terrified of loud, scary things? "I don't see why—" Fluttershy realized what she was doing. "I'm having an argument with a voice in my head. Does that mean something's wrong with me?" The answer is probably 'yes'. "Oh hush, I wasn't asking you...I'm sorry, that was so rude of me..." Angel Bunny, who had been watching all of this, rolled his eyes at the clearly insane pegasus. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Ahem." Luna cleared her throat and puffed her chest out. "'Hello, dear friends'—no, that's terrible." She scrunched up the page she was reading from and tossed it to the side, where a pile of similar paper balls accumulated. A quill and fresh parchment floated up in front of her, and she wrote a new greeting to test out. "'Oh my, how nice to see you all again!' ...Bah! Too insincere." Over her shoulder went the page, soon replaced by another. "'Are you all here for me? You didn't have to do that!' ...No no no NO!" The last was shouted in the Royal Canterlot voice, causing a nearby mirror to be shattered. The princess hung her head and sighed. She had spent all day getting ready for that evening, but no matter what she did, she only succeeded in making herself feel more and more nervous. "If only my opponent was a foul ogre," she grumbled. "Oh ho, then I would be fine! But no, instead I have to survive an evening with other ponies!" Luna glanced over at the brownies that she had received from the palace kitchens. Earlier, she had tried her own hoof at baking, but the results had been less than successful. A chef, covered head-to-hoof in the remnants of Luna's version of 'chocolate cake' after the inevitable explosion, had politely but firmly (and even the socially-impaired princess could see that he was seething with anger and irritation) told her to leave the food to him. She began to pace back and forth across the room. "A pox upon cooking! And a pox upon baked goods—" A sudden idea caused her to halt momentarily. "Hmm... perhaps I shall ask for instruction from Twilight Sparkle on how to cook..." Little did she know that Twilight's own baking had become the stuff of legends. Terrifying legends, meant to be cautionary tales for aspiring chefs. A fanfare of trumpets interrupted Luna's frenzied steps, followed by the doors to her suite slamming open. "Her Majesty, Princess Celestia!" announced the guard who had entered (Without knocking, Luna noted with a scowl). "Hamfist, how many times must I tell you?" the alicorn in question scolded as she moved past the guard. "You must seek a pony's permission to enter before barging through their doors!" "Of course, Princess! My apologies, Princess!" The zealous expression Hamfist wore told everypony that he was anything but sorry. At a gesture from Celestia, he backed out of the room and closed the door behind him. "'Hamfist'?" Luna asked primly. "Thou hast a guard named 'Hamfist'? Do tell, is his second-in-command's name 'Turkeycock'—" "How good to see you, Luna!" Celestia interrupted with a nervous laugh. After a moment's pause, she added, "You know, it really isn't proper to mock a pony's name." "Meh. For as long as he continues to defy Our privacy, so too shall he remain a fair target for Our witty jibes and jests!" "I suppose I can't argue with that." The white alicorn looked around, taking note of the pile of discarded parchment. "Anyway, I'm only here to see you before you go to Ponyville! Are you looking forward to it?" "Dear sister, do griffons drink their victory wine from the skulls of their fallen enemies?" Luna asked, receiving only a blank stare in reply. "Erm, that is... yes, We are—I am—greatly anticipating it. Although We—confound it, I—am beginning to feel jittery." Celestia nudged her sister lightly. "I'm here to listen if you need to talk about it." "Sister, I..." The dark princess swallowed, and cleared her throat. "Up until now, I have spent nearly all of my efforts on once more becoming a capable ruler. However, that has left very little time to spend with... you know..." "Normal ponies?" "Precisely! In fact, the only normal pony that isn't terrified of me is Twilight Sparkle!" A realization hit Luna right as she finished that sentence. "But I suppose that she is no longer a normal pony herself... That means that, for every one of my subjects, I am naught but a specter of terror and nightmare!" "Luna, that's—" "In fact, it is certain that the other Elements of Harmony will know only fear in my presence! Very well, I have decided. I shall write Twilight Sparkle and tell her that I cannot come tonight! No, sister, do not try to change my mind; I shan't be budged!" "Luna." Celestia's firm voice carried a tone that said she would brook no argument. "Luna, that couldn't be further from the truth." "Truly?" the dark alicorn said, her eyes shining. "You mean, my mere proximity won't set mortals aquiver in fear?" "'Shan't be budged', eh? I'm certain that if you relax and just be yourself, nopony will be anything other than happy to be near you." Without warning, she found herself wrapped in a tight embrace. "Tia, your words never fail to lighten my mood," Luna said. "Just... make sure you don't do that thing with the storm clouds." "Storm clouds?" "And try not to shoot any lightning." "I wouldn't dream of it!" "And no shouting. Even if something surprises you!" "Sister, you wound me by even suggesting such a thing!" "And if I even hear a rumor that you've burnt down another renaissance faire—" "One time! That was one time! And I said I was sorry!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Ok, so we've got snacks, games, drinks, cushions... am I missing anything?" Twilight turned to face her dragon assistant, Spike, who was going over her checklist. "You haven't gotten any ice cream yet," he stated with a sage-like nod. "Wah, you're right! I'll go and—wait a minute." She frowned at him. "I didn't put that on the list." "Pfft..." the dragon snickered. "You're almost too easy to tease." I should talk to Rainbow and Pinkie about the things they're teaching him, the alicorn thought. Out loud, she said, "Well hardy har har. C'mon, Mr. Prankster, help me clean this place up a bit." Just as she was moving a particularly heavy textbook, a soft knock came from the door. "I'm on it," Spike said dutifully, opening the door to reveal a timid-looking Fluttershy. "H-h-h-h-h-hi, Spike." Her legs were shaking so badly that her knees knocked against each other. "H-hi, Twilight.." "Hey, are you alright?" Twilight asked, concern etched across her face. "You're trembling, and your face looks really pale." Now that she was inside, out of the fading sunlight, the pegasus seemed to find a bit of comfort. "Um, I-I-I'm f-fine," she stuttered. "P-pr-probably." "Are you really that scared of Princess Luna?" "Well, um, maybe a bit. Kinda. Yes." The last word was said as a barely audible squeak. "Oh, Fluttershy..." Twilight sat next to her friend. "I'm sorry. You know I hate to put you in situations that make you uncomfortable, but this is really important. Do you know what it's like to not have friends?" "I... yes." "Then you can understand how Luna feels right now, correct? If the other girls could have made it, then I wouldn't put this kind of pressure on you, but you are, at this moment, the only pony who can help! So... what do you say?" Fluttershy, who appeared to have been emotionally moved by the description of Luna's plight, put on a brave face and nodded. "I'll do it!" she said with what in other ponies would be called trepidation, but in her was tantamount to courage. "No matter what happens, I won't hide or be scared of her, not even once!" It was right at that moment that the door blew open. Lightning flashed through the windows, accompanying a voice both deep and dire. "Greetings! It is I, Luna!" Ch 3: In Which Fluttershy Quakes, and Luna is Terrible at Naming ConstellationsCh 3: In Which Fluttershy Quakes, and Luna is Terrible at Naming Constellations The flight from Canterlot to Ponyville only took a few minutes for Luna, a fact for which she was grateful. She knew that her mind would wander while in transit, and if the voyage was long enough, her doubts would eventually re-manifest themselves. Before she departed, she had divested herself of her royal accoutrements; even her tiara was left behind in favor of a more modest appearance, which would ideally put others at ease in her presence. Plus, those crystal slippers are murder on my hooves, the alicorn thought with a smirk. As soon as she touched down outside the library, however, her prior misgivings returned in full force. Over the course of ten minutes, the princess went through a repeating set of actions, in which she would walk to the door, almost knock, then lose her nerve and back away. Why are you being such a coward, Luna? she wondered. You are one of the mightiest beings in existence! There is nothing to be afraid of! The sound of hoofsteps reached her ears, and before Luna's mind could react, her body launched itself up to hide amongst the tree branches. Down below, a yellow pegasus approached the library, trepidation clear in her every step. Oh, it's her—Fluttershy, from Nightmare Night, the princess realized with a start. She felt a stab of sympathy for the poor mare, who was clearly plagued by nigh-crippling fear, but not even that was enough to bring the concealed alicorn out of her hiding place. The library door opened, allowing the pegasus entry; as soon as the coast was clear, Luna dropped back to the ground. Ok, enough of this! I shall just knock, Twilight will let me inside, and we shall all have a fun evening. Ready, Luna? Ready. Alright. She exhaled heavily. The princess was just about to tap her hoof against the wooden portal when the instinct to flee-or-fight took her by the back of the neck. It was a knee-jerk reaction (literally) when, instead of knocking on the door, she kicked it open. Some little voice in the back of her head repeated Celestia's warnings against doing things that might intimidate other ponies, but at this point it was too late. Luna had fully entered 'princess mode', and nothing she could do could stop it. Black storm clouds formed behind her, making everypony in the general vicinity aware of her terrible majesty, and as bolts of magical lightning lit up the sky, she sucked in a breath and spoke. "Greetings! It is I, Luna!" The dragon that lived with Twilight had been standing too close to her when she unleashed her voice, and the concussive force behind Luna's words sent him tumbling across the room. "Hahaha!" he chuckled when he came to a stop, upside down, against the opposite wall. "That was awesome!" "I have come bearing a gift!" she continued, brandishing the food she had brought with her. "Behold—brownies!" "P-Princess Luna!" Twilight shouted with a hoof over each ear. "Too—loud!" Luna immediately shrank back in embarrassment. "Sorry," she said. "Ouch, that smarts," the purple mare muttered, rubbing the side of her head. "It's fine, Luna, I'm just glad you could make it!" "Thank you for the invitation." Luna levitated the brownies over to the table where the other food was arranged. "Am I early?" "No, you're right on time. There was just a little problem. I... kinda didn't check beforehand to see if my other friends were available, and everypony except Fluttershy already had plans. I'm sorry..." "There's nothing to apologize for," the dark alicorn said. "I look forward to properly meeting Fluttershy! Pray tell, where is she?" "What do you mean? She's right..." Twilight turned to gesture at her pegasus friend only to find an empty, pony-less space beside her. "...here? Fluttershy!" The last was said loudly, but Fluttershy didn't answer. "Huh. I wonder where she went." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "No matter what happens, I won't hide or be scared of her, not even once!" These words echoed through Fluttershy's mind as she sat inside an empty cupboard. Hiding. Scared out of her little mind. A pony of my word, that's me, she thought. I can't even be brave for a few seconds... She could hear Twilight calling her name, but the little pegasus couldn't muster the courage needed to respond. Then, hoofsteps sounded right outside of her hole, and she noticed, too late, that the end of her tail was sticking out of the door. Oh, ponyfeathers... Bright light hit her eyes as the door opened to reveal a large, dark-blue pony looking back in. "Aha, I found her!" Luna cried. Fluttershy let out a quiet 'eek' and tried her hardest to shrink into the wood around her. "There you are," Twilight said, trotting over. "Fluttershy, come on out and meet Luna!" The pegasus shook her head quickly, and the young princess sighed before dragging the stubborn mare out with a levitation spell. When she was plopped onto the floor, Fluttershy's legs began to shake and her eyelids clamped shut. After a minute of silence, Luna looked over at Twilight, who shrugged. "Fluttershy, you remember Princess Luna, right?" The pegasus opened one eye tentatively before giving another 'eek' and closing it once more. "What's the matt—" "Twilight Sparkle, I'm going to step outside. I would... like some fresh air." The princess walked off slowly, hooves dragging on the ground. As soon as Luna was outside and out of sight, Fluttershy visibly relaxed. "Seriously, what's wrong?" Twilight asked. "I... just... she's a..." "She's a what?" "She's a princess!" Fluttershy blurted out. "It's—it's—princesses are scary!" "Wh...what?!" Twilight said. "I'm a princess too! Am I scary?" "No," came the immediate response. "You're, um, different. You're still the same Twilight as before." "What about Princess Celestia? I've never seen you shy away from her." "That's because she acts like my mother." "So the only problem is that Luna just-so-happens to be a princess?" Fluttershy began to play with the end of her mane. "Well, I... um..." "When she comes back in here, do you think you could try to see her as just another pony?" Twilight asked. "I'll... I'll try," the pegasus said. "Thanks. I'm going to go check on her; I don't like the way she looked when she walked out." She seemed so depressed, thought Fluttershy of Luna, watching her friend close the door behind her. Is it because of me? Gathering all of her courage, the yellow mare forced herself to follow. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I was right to have expected this, Luna thought from her place on a nearby hill. I should not have gotten my hopes up. The sun had disappeared over the horizon, allowing the heavens to open up and reveal their celestial bounty. The princess's horn lit briefly, and she enacted the spell that would set the moon on its course across the night sky. On a whim, she also painted a few streaks of red and blue across the starry canvas, then nodded in apparent satisfaction. "What are you doing up here?" said Twilight. Luna didn't bother to turn her head to look at the approaching alicorn. "Twilight, I fear that this was a mistake," the dark princess said. "The distance between my subjects and me is too vast to be overcome." "That can't be true—" "I truly do appreciate the effort you have put in on my behalf. However, in the future, I believe I shall stick to matters of state—" "Oh my!" gasped a voice from behind them. Both mares turned to regard the newcomer and found Fluttershy, standing just a few feet away with her head tilted upwards. "The sky is so beautiful tonight!" "Thank you," Luna mumbled. "Um... you're welcome?" Fluttershy said, glancing at Twilight. "Why are you thanking me?" "Because that was a kind compliment," Luna replied, which just served to confuse the pegasus more. Fortunately, Twilight correctly guessed the misunderstanding. "Those are Luna's stars," she said. "She puts them up there. Not just the moon, but all of the night sky is her domain." "You mean—" Fluttershy's eyes widened. "All of that—just one single pony did that?" She sat down heavily, mouth hanging open. "My favorites are the constellations," Twilight said, walking over to point at the sky for the pegasus's benefit. "See, that's Taurus, and there's Cancer, and that's—" "Forgive my interruption, but those names are not entirely correct." Luna, too, directed her gaze upward, her somber expression wiped away by one of bliss. "What do you mean?" the other princess asked. "Apparently, the astronomers within the past three centuries decided that they did not care for my method of nomenclature, and thus thought to give new names to my constellations." Luna's horn lit up, and the stars that formed constellations became brighter so that they could be more easily discerned. "That one's real name is actually 'Stupid-Looking Crab Thing'. And that one's 'Luna Kicking a Minotaur'. Oh, and there's one of my favorites... I call it 'Terrifying Monster of the Morning'." "'Terrifying Monster of the Morning'?" Twilight repeated. "What the hay are you talking about?" "Let's just say that my sister is not a 'morning pony'." "I don't... wait, you mean Princess Celestia?!" Luna nodded. "You've clearly never seen her right after she's rolled out of bed." "What are some of the other names?" Fluttershy asked. "Let me see... Do you see that one there?" the princess said, waving at one in particular. "Yup." "Very well. See if you can guess what it truly is depicting." "Well, the current name is 'The King and Queen', so..." Twilight tapped her chin. "Could they actually be siblings?" Luna smiled and shook her head. "Parent and child." Another shake. "Ugh, don't worry, I'll get it—" "Um..." Fluttershy said quietly, "I know what it is." "Wait, seriously?" Twilight exclaimed. "Y-yes. It's, um... I don't want to say." "C'mon, don't leave me hanging!" "I can't..." "Pleeeease?" "I..." The pegasus could no longer hold out. "It's... well, it's two ponies... doing... things..." "Things?" "You know, um, um, naughty... things..." Fluttershy developed a blush so deeply red, it was a wonder that she had any blood left for the rest of her body. "Naughty...?" Twilight mused, not quite understanding. Then, it clicked. "Wait wait, there's no way that's it! Luna wouldn't—" "Yes! Yes yes yes!!" The sudden exclamation from the dark princess caused the other two mares to jump. They looked at Luna to find her doing an impromptu victory dance. "Cadance told me that nopony would ever guess it right! Ha, that'll show her! That's why I'm the Princess of the Night, not her!" "Luna!" Twilight screeched. "Why would you put something like that up there?! Do you realize how inappropriate that is?!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ While Twilight unsuccessfully berated Luna (who had just started to do her 'moon-walk'), Fluttershy had a realization. This odd pony standing before her might be a princess with an intimidating amount of power, but she was still a pony all the same. Luna had likes and dislikes, qualities both good and bad, a sense of humor, and the ability to give things terrible names. Right at that moment, Luna had become nothing more than a fellow mare. Fluttershy normally didn't enjoy crude humor, but the idea of such a raunchy scene depicted in the sky, put there by a princess of Equestria no less, for some reason tickled the yellow mare's funny bone. She began to giggle. "Fluttershy!" Twilight said, turning to her friend. "Don't laugh! It'll just encourage her!" "We are sorry, We cannot hear thee over the sound of thy jealousy," Luna taunted, deliberately slipping back into the archaic dialect. "Who would be jealous of—oh, I give up. When you two decide to act your respective ages, I'll be at the library." With that, she gave an indignant 'hmph!' and walked smartly back to her tree. "I hope I did not offend her too badly," the dark princess said, trotting over to stand by Fluttershy. Now that she had seen Luna in a more casual light, the pegasus felt nothing more than her usual fear of interacting with a pony she didn't know well. "If you did, all you need to do is apologize," she said. "Friends forgive each other for things like that." Luna nodded, comforted by the reassuring words. For a few minutes, the two mares talked further about the night sky. Luna demonstrated some of the ways she could shape it to her liking, drawing appreciative 'oooh's and 'aaah's from her audience of one. Finally, the air grew cold enough to force them back inside. "Um, Luna..." Fluttershy said during the walk back, "I'm sorry..." "Sorry for what?" "For the way I acted earlier... I was so scared of Luna the princess that I completely ignored both Luna the mare and her feelings..." The princess nudged the other pony lightly. "You said it earlier—'friends forgive each other for things like that', right? So... that is, if I can call you my friend..." "I would like that—" Fluttershy was cut off when Luna pulled her into an embrace that was more akin to a bear-hug. "Huzzah!" she cried. "I have made a second friend! Thank you, dear Fluttershy, thank you thank you thank you!" "Can't—" the pegasus gasped, her face going purple, "—breath!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Once Fluttershy recovered from Luna's chokehold, and after they met back up with Twilight, the rest of the evening passed in a blur. They played games, enjoyed snacks and tea, ("Behold, Twilight, for I have mastered the art of not breaking tea cups! No more styrofoam for this princess!"), and chatted until long past Spike had gone to bed. Twilight envied the ease with which the other two mares now interacted. It seemed like a dam had been broken and both were now rushing to make up for the time that they had missed spending together. In fact, they were so intent on their conversation that Twilight began to feel a bit like a fifth wheel. The young alicorn didn't resent it, however—she was overwhelmingly happy that they had become friends. Unfortunately, all good things must come to an end, and all-too-soon the clock struck midnight. Walking outside, Luna bade her friends farewell and took to the air to return to Canterlot. As she watched the dark-blue pony fade into the night, Fluttershy felt a strange sense of loss building up inside of her. I must be getting tired... I just met the mare, after all. I can't be missing her already... ...can I? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Luna, on the other hoof, hadn't felt so energized since the years before her stint as Nightmare Moon. I did it! she thought. I did it I did it! A new friend! I wonder what types of things she will want to do in the future. How shall I go about approaching her about it? Hmmm... Perhaps Celestia or Twilight will know. For the rest of the night, and the next few days as well, the dark princess could hardly think of anything else. Ch 4: In Which Rarity Makes a Decision, and Discord Trolls HardCh 4: In Which Rarity Makes a Decision, and Discord Trolls Hard It was a completely exhausted Celestia that collapsed into her bed a week later. The day had been filled to the brim with appointments, activities, and other assorted items that had required her participation. Many of her advisers believed that much of that work fell beneath her, and should be left to those of 'lesser importance', but the princess ignored them. Despite the fatigue that accompanied her at the end of each day, there was a certain satisfaction that she felt in taking such an active role in her country's governance. It certainly beats lazing around on a throne all day, she thought with a grin. The alicorn snuggled into her soft pillows happily, relishing the way they shaped themselves to her form. Her horn glowed and a levitation spell draped a large quilt over her prone body. Unfortunately, just as she fell into slumber, something tapped her on the forehead. Celestia's eyes cracked open and immediately locked onto the grinning face of the being that was, all at once, the most helpful and troublesome creature she knew. "WHAAAH!" she screamed in surprise, trying to leap up but only managing to get caught in the blankets. She rolled off the side of the bed and landed with a loud *thump*. "Is this a bad time?" Discord asked in mock concern. "I could come back later... perhaps when you're bathing?" "And here I had hoped to end the day on a good note," Celestia said sarcastically. "What do you want?" The dragonequis slapped his hands over his heart, feigning emotional injury. "Celestia, you wound me! Here I am, lending you my invaluable assistance, and all you can think to do is insult me?" "Discord. What—do—you—want?" "Sheesh, fine. Somepony got off on the wrong side of the bed..." He snickered, pointedly glancing at the princess still lying on the ground. "I'm just here, as per our prior agreement, to inform you of the success of my foray into the griffon territories." That's right, she realized as her mind fully woke up. I asked him to go there. And this isn't something he can report to any of my subjects. "Very well," she said in the most dignified tone she could muster (considering she was still tangled up in her quilt and sheets). "What are the details?" "The candidate that you favored won the crown, of course, likely due to the competition being... otherwise occupied." Discord leaped into a conjured hammock and a glass of lemonade appeared in his hand. "Really, Celestia, I never suspected that you would be the type to sabotage something like a royal election." "It isn't like I wanted to interfere," she protested. "Strom was the only candidate who I was certain would favor continued peace with Equestria; making sure he won was something that I had to do!" "You mean it was something that I had to do," he reminded her. "'Credit where credit is due' and all that." "Very well." The princess gave an exaggerated sigh. "Discord, on behalf of all Equestrians, I would like to—" "Pfft. I hope you're planning on giving me something more substantial than a 'Good boy, Discord, now run along and stay out of mommy's way!' First (and most regrettable) of all, you're not my mommy. And second of all—" "Fine," she snapped. "What would you consider an appropriate reward for your service?" "Ooo, I thought you'd never ask!" A puff of smoke forced Celestia to close her eyes and cough. As soon as she got herself back under control, she found that she had been dressed up like Santa Claus (beard and all) and that Discord now sat in her lap. "This year, for Hearth's Warming, I want—" he began, only to be shoved off by an irate alicorn. "I'm serious, Discord, I'm very tired, and not at all in the mood for your games." "You're no fun..." With a snap of his fingers, the red hat and coat disappeared, leaving only the fake beard behind. The princess shook it off, earning a disappointed 'aaaw'. "I want a break. You've had me back and forth across the map for the past three months, and as much as I enjoy travelling, it's getting to be a bit... wearisome." "That's it? That's all you want?" "What, do I need to beg?" Now I'm really curious. "Perhaps. Where do you plan on taking this 'break'?" "Well, first I'm going to visit a friend," Discord answered. "Then I'm going to take some good-old down time, kick back at the beach, you know, same-old same-old." "I suppose that's reasonable enough. Very well, consider yourself on leave." "If I'm feeling charitable enough, perhaps I'll bring you back a souvenir. Or something. Probably not. Toodles!" He waggled his fingers at her and vanished. Visit a friend? the princess thought. He doesn't have any friends, who's—Oh. Suddenly, she realized who the dragonequis had meant. "Twilight's not going to like this." Then, with a shrug that said, "oh well, not my problem," she hopped back into bed and within seconds was sound asleep. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The sound of a rooster's crowing floated distantly through the air, signaling that the sun had risen and that anypony still asleep was a lazy bum. Fluttershy's eyes cracked open and she sat up in her bed. After a hoof was lifted to wipe her eyes, she stretched all four of her limbs to their limits. "Another sleepless night," she muttered. "Maybe I'll just stay here for a bit longer..." An hour later, the pegasus had finally gotten around to making herself some breakfast—her normal blend of oatmeal with a touch of brown sugar. However, the taste was blander than she was used to. She added more sugar and ate a spoonful, cringing at how sweet it had become. The ruined dish was pushed away and soon forgotten. What's wrong with me? Her bleary gaze wandered over the walls while her mind wandered. I was so happy a week ago...what changed? Fluttershy had just gathered the effort needed to go for a walk when there was a knock on the door. She walked over and pulled it open. "Good morning, dear!" said Rarity with a dazzling smile. "How are—why, Fluttershy! You look awful!" "Do I?" the yellow mare asked, looking at her reflection in a nearby window. "My apologies, that didn't come out how I meant it," her friend amended. "What I mean is you look like you haven't gotten any sleep! You have bags under your eyes! And your mane, you haven't been taking care of it! Is something the matter?" Yes, but I don't know what it is... "Don't worry about me," Fluttershy said out loud. "It's nothing important." "Now, Fluttershy. You know I cannot simply let this go! I'm your friend, after all! You can tell me anything!" "I suppose talking can't hurt... Oh, where are my manners? Please come in, sit down!" Within a few minutes, the two mares were seated in the sitting room with a cup of warm tea each. "Alright, dear, what's bothering you?" Rarity asked. "I... I don't know," the pegasus answered. "I'm just... there's something wrong, but I... oh, I'm no good, am I? You're wasting your time on me—" "That is nonsense, and you know it," the white mare said. She put a comforting foreleg around her friend's shoulders. "If you don't know what the problem is, then we'll figure it out together! Alright?" "I... I guess..." A small smile lit up Fluttershy's face. "See, you're already feeling a little bit better!" "I guess I am... Ever since you got here, I've cheered up a little." Rarity took a dainty sip of her beverage. "Could it be that you're feeling lonely?" "That's—no, I can't be!" the yellow pony declared vehemently (well, relatively vehemently). "I've—I've got Angel here, and all of my animal friends, and—and—" "That's true, but—and I truly mean no offense to your woodland companions—they cannot interact with you as another pony could." "What do you mean?" "Well, they cannot have conversation, for one thing," Rarity stated. "I know that you love them dearly, but it will always be the love for one's children, not a friend." "But..." Memories of the past few days flashed through Fluttershy's mind. Feeding her chickens, preparing her dinner, getting into bed, playing with Angel... all of those times, she had been surrounded by all manner of little critters. Squirrels, chipmunks, rabbits, birds, they had all been there. But despite their presence, she hadn't felt any better. Not like how I feel with somepony else here. "I think I understand what you mean." "Good! We're making progress!" The unicorn clapped her hooves together. "Well, if I'm right and your problem is loneliness, then I have the perfect solution!" Why do I get the feeling that I'm not going to enjoy this? "We are going to find you a stallion!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "AAAH!" Twilight shrieked when she looked in the mirror and saw that her horn had turned into a party hat. "Undo! Undo! Undo!" Fortunately, even though it had changed its form, its function had remained the same, and a quick counter-spell had it back to normal. "Are you alright?" asked Fluttershy, pushing her way through the front door in a furtive fashion. "Phew, yes..." The alicorn breathed a sigh of relief. "That was almost a disaster..." "I'm glad you fixed... whatever was wrong." "Thanks! Now, what can I do for you?" Twilight's eyes narrowed suspiciously. "And why did it look like you were sneaking around?" "Oh, that—w-well, I j-just—um..." Fluttershy took a moment to collect herself. This is Twilight, I can trust her. "Um... Rarity's going to g-get me a d-d-date, and—" "WHAT?! You're going to date?!" "I—yes, and I need a book to help—" Twilight gave her a hug and began to bounce in place. "Ooo this is so exciting! I've never helped a friend find love before! There's gotta be something on dating in here somewhere! Hmmm..." She regarded the vast selection of books with a seasoned eye. "Aha, here's one. 'Dating and You: Finding and Keeping That Perfect Somepony'. This seems promising!" She placed it on a table and the two mares crowded together to read it. "Are you looking forward to it?" the princess said. "I guess... maybe... I don't know..." "Who's the lucky pony?" asked Discord. "Yeah, who is it?!" Twilight echoed. "I don't know, Rarity is—EEEEEK!" "DISCORD, WHAT THE HAY ARE YOU DOING IN MY LIBRARY?!" The dragonequis dropped to the ground, rolling and laughing. "You two—HAHA—so predictable—" he said between chortles. "Aah, to mess with Twilight Sparkle's head again... How I missed it." "D-Discord..." Fluttershy's voice trailed off. "Don't be paranoid, I'm not going to tell anyone else about your little 'dating' dilemma; I've got better things to do than gossip like a fourteen-year-old school-dragon." "Seriously, what are you doing here?" Twilight asked with a scowl, clearly unhappy to be playing host to one of her least favorite beings. "You should be more courteous to a visiting friend," Discord scolded. "If you aren't careful, you just might hurt my feelings." "Ha, like you have any feelings to hurt!" Fluttershy gasped and looked at her friend. "Twilight!" "Don't worry, she's right on the money with that one. Well, mostly. I do love our little tête-à-têtes, though..." "Anyways, Fluttershy and I were having a very serious, very private discussion, so if you don't mind..." "I do hope you enjoy talking about stallions and romancing and whatnot!" he said. "Maybe I shall drop in on you again later, when you're in a better mood, Miss Prissy Pants." He closed himself in a book, and when it fell to the floor and opened, he was gone. "I wish you would be nicer to him," the pegasus said reproachfully. "He's a good pon—dragonequis at heart." "Yeah yeah..." Twilight muttered, not meeting her friend's eyes. "A-anyway, let's take a closer look at this book. It says right here..." Ch 5: In Which Fluttershy Dates, Luna Rages, and a Wild Plot AppearsCh 5: In Which Fluttershy Dates, Luna Rages, and a Wild Plot Appears Luna pranced through the castle, still on cloud nine from her visit to Ponyville. The normally morose alicorn hummed to herself, singing a jaunty little tune that she had heard somewhere or other. Suddenly, she noticed Hamfist, who stood at attention along the hallway. "Good afternoon, Hamfist," she greeted in mock solemnity. "Princess." "How goes the watch?" "The watch goes well, princess." "Barged in on any sleeping ponies lately?" "...Princess?" "Oh, nothing, nothing... Very well, keep up the good work." She continued her trot towards the throne room. "Yes, princess." I do enjoy being in a good mood. In fact, I believe I feel like visiting Twilight again. It may be time to learn how to cook... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ What am I doing here what am I doing here what am I doing here... Fluttershy stood outside of a fancy restaurant in Ponyville, eyes darting back and forth nervously while her knees shook. The past few days had flown by, and before she knew it, the evening that she dreaded had arrived. FLASHBACK "He'll need to be a gentlecolt," Rarity said. "Somepony who will treat you the way you deserve." "Rarity, you don't have to—" "Nonsense!" the unicorn exclaimed. "If this is what it takes to let you be happy again, then I am more than willing to invest all of my time and effort!" "That's not what I mean—" "Aha! I got it! Fluttershy, I think I know just what to do! Let me call a few ponies and see what happens! I'll let you know when I have good news!" UN-FLASHBACK That had been three days ago. Rarity soon returned with a report that she had spoken with Fancy Pants, who had spoken with a friend, who had spoken with a friend, and so on and so forth. Eventually, they had found a stallion who was looking for a mare—Magnum, a prestigious member of the Canterlot nobility. Rarity even asked around about his reputation, receiving nothing but good reports; with those bases covered, it was a simple matter to arrange a dinner date for him and Fluttershy. Oh dear oh dear, what's he going to be like? Is he going to want to do anything afterward? What if he wants to.... *gasp*... kiss me? "Don't let him do anything that makes you feel uncomfortable!" came Rarity's voice. "This is a first date, not a promise of engagement!" Just as she approached the panic threshold, beyond which lay danger of hyperventilation, a large carriage rolled up in front of the pegasus. A burly pony placed a set of portable stairs on the ground and pulled the door open to reveal a very handsome unicorn. He straightened his tuxedo jacket and descended to stand before the petrified Fluttershy. "Ah, you must be my date," the pony she assumed was Magnum said offhandedly. "Well, don't just stand there waiting for a butterfly to flutter down your throat, let us go and sit down." "Um, M-Magnum, s-s-sir—" she began, but he cut her off. "That's 'Lord' Magnum', to you." "D-do you, um..." Fluttershy stuttered, "...do you h-have a f-f-first n-name?" The unicorn's eyes narrowed angrily. "I do not use my first name. Ever." When she looked like she was going to say something else, he barked, "Mention it no more!" The stallion walked forward, not even waiting for his date to follow. Her brow furrowed slightly. Well, this isn't a good start. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Luna came to a skidding-stop in front of the library. Before she could knock on the door, it was yanked open by Twilight herself. "Hi, Luna!" she said cheerfully. "Did you have a good flight?" "I most certainly did." The dark princess walked inside with a bounce in her step. "So, shall we get right to it?" "Certainly!" Just as Luna was going to the kitchen, she noticed a number of sandbags that had been piled up to form a half-circle wall with barbed wire on top. Out of curiosity, the princess peered over the barricade and found Spike lying on the ground, drawing with crayons. He had an army helmet balanced haphazardly on his head. "Spike?" she asked of him, getting the little dragon's attention. "For what reason have you fortified this area?" "Twi's teaching you how to cook, right?" The alicorn nodded. "Well, what I want to do is run from here, screaming, but somebody's gotta make sure she doesn't burn down the library." "I'm certain that your fears are misplaced." "Yeah yeah, we'll see..." "Luna, c'mon! We've got a lot to do!" With a final glance at Twilight's assistant, Luna trotted to join her friend. "So, I was wondering," the dark princess said off-hoofedly as she slipped into an apron, "will fair Fluttershy be joining us?" "Oh, no, she can't tonight," Twilight replied. "She's got a date." "A date?!" Luna exclaimed. "With who?!" "With some noble stallion, Margarine or something," the purple alicorn said, taking no note of her companion's distress. "Alright, so the first step is..." A date? Luna's attention turned to her musings for a minute. I... it is of no concern to me if she desires a mate. No concern at all. With that thought firmly in mind, she returned her focus to her temporary teacher. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "And so she said, 'Of course Magnum's hair is perfect! It's always perfect!'" The stallion finished his story with a tittering laugh. On the other side of the table, Fluttershy halfheartedly giggled, more to be polite and contribute than anything else. In truth, she was nearly bored to tears. Ever since sitting down, Magnum had done nothing except talk about himself. Her nervousness had long ago vanished, replaced by an emotion that approached irritation. "What about you?" he asked suddenly, surprising her with the question. Is he asking me about myself? Maybe he isn't completely wrapped up in himself..."Well, I'm—" she started. "What do you think about my hair?" Nope, he really is. "It's lovely," she said in a flat voice. "Of course it is. You don't even have to tell me." Then why did you ask? "I must say, this 'Ponyville', it's quite the nest of hicks," Magnum stated loudly. "I—I'm sorry?" "It's very quaint and rustic, wouldn't you say?" Just... bear with it, Fluttershy. Only a little longer, and you never have to see him again. Only a little longer... She gave him a fake smile, and the noble launched into another tale about himself. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "C'mon, Flats, this is stupid..." "No way bro! We'll be seriously rich if we can hunt down that castle!" Two stallions, barely out of colthood, pushed their way through the Everfree Forest. The one in front, Flats, an earth pony, had a large knife in his mouth that he was using to cut a path in the vegetation. "Plum, you still back there?" Flats asked around the knife's handle. "Of course I am, no way am I going anywhere in here by myself." "Why don't you do the cutting? You can use your magic to do that, right?" Plum's horn lit up and he took the knife from Flats' grip. "It's not good being here during the night, bro," he said nervously. "Those stories they told us when we were little colts... I don't think they're made-up." "Don't be a wuss," the earth pony said, derision in his tone. "Those mares that always hang out together have been in here tons of times, and they all make it out fine. If a mare can do it, then it'll be no problem for a stallion." "I don't think that's how it works..." However, Plum didn't argue any further, knowing that he wouldn't be changing his companion's mind. "Anyway, I think we should—AAAH!" His front hoof came down upon nothing, and before he knew it, Plum was falling into a hole that had been hidden under the thick vines. He hit an incline and continued to roll down it. Something wet mingled with his mane, but he was spinning too quickly to stop and see what it was. Finally, the slope leveled out and the stallion came to a stop. "Ooooh..." he groaned, rubbing his head gingerly. He created a magical light and looked around to see where he was. He stood in a small stream (fortunately, the wetness was only water, not blood), which came trickling down the slope he had just descended. The tunnel he was in was about twice the height of a pony. Plum was lucky because, although the knife had fallen with him, it hadn't caused any injury. Suddenly, a voice echoed down from the chute's entrance. "Plum!" it called faintly. "Bro, are you alive?" "I'm alright!" the unicorn called back, but Flats didn't say anything more. "That'ss what you think, flessh." Plum whipped around to face further down the tunnel. The deep, gravelly voice had come from that direction, beyond the range of his conjured torch. "Wh-who's there?" he whimpered, backing up slowly. He spun on his back heel once more when he heard something hit the ground from behind. The unicorn immediately realized his mistake when he saw that the noise had been made by a falling stone. Something located behind him drew a ragged breath, and he knew that whatever monster he had come across was standing right there. He stabbed backwards with the knife in the hope of getting a lucky hit, but it was knocked away and fell from his magical grip. "What little nuisssance is thiss, that disssturbss my centuriess-long sslumber?" Plum's head twisted slowly to give him a glimpse of what terrible beast the darkness had conjured, but all he saw was a pair of green eyes. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Mayhaps we should call it a night," Luna said stoically. A layer of fine, white power covered her coat, which meant that she was cleaner than roughly 80% of everything else in the library, including Twilight herself. "I'm sure that I had it right that time," the young princess insisted as she wiped black goo out of her eyes. "Dost thou—my apologies, do you know where all of this... this... " The dark alicorn waved a hoof around to indicate the entire mess. "...stuff... originated?" "I think there was a tiny mistake in the indredient ratio." "How did you make a mistake?! We were making chocolate milk! There are but two ingredients—'chocolate' and 'milk'! I daresay this doesn't even count as 'cooking' in the first place!" "Hey!" Twilight said defensively. "Everypony's gotta start somewhere!" "I tooooold yooooou," Spike called from his sandbag hideout. "Twilight Sparkle, I fear that it is time for me to retire," Luna said. "It is past the time I alotted, and I still have a number of duties to complete before I sleep." "Pfffft... *snicker*... 'duties to complete'..." "Spike! Grow up!" Twilight shouted. "Was that a jest? I do not understand..." "Don't worry about that. Could you help me clean this up before you go?" Luna's horn lit and a spell washed over the room, banishing every last bit of the mess to the nethers. "There, art thou—are you content?" "You'll have to teach me that one," Twilight said, in awe of the older princess's prowess. "Next time, remind me and I shall! Twilight Sparkle, thank you for the cooking lesson." Luna restrained herself from sarcastically emphasizing the word 'lesson'. "I always enjoy spending time with you." "It's no problem, you're a fun pony to hang out with." "I shall see you soon," the night princess said. However, right as she reached for the door handle, she stopped and began to chuckle. "Heh...'Duties'... I get it!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Flats paced back and forth in front of the hole that Plum had fallen down through. The unicorn had initially shouted something up, but for the past half hour, there hadn't been a peep. "That idiot probably got himself killed," the earth pony mumbled. "I should just leave him down there. Yeah, if he hasn't come back up by now, then he's never coming up." In front of Flats, a large bush shook, causing the stallion to jump back in alarm. "Wh-who's there?" he stuttered. When nopony answered, he slowly shuffled in the opposite direction, making sure not to look away. "I-I-I'm j-just leaving, okay? So d-don't hurt me!" The bush was disturbed more violently than before as a pony stepped through it and into sight. "Plum!" Flats exclaimed, recognizing his friend. The unicorn stood there, eyes cast downward. "What took you so long? I was just about to go down for ya!" Plum remained silent; he didn't even look up. "Hey, something wrong? Say something." Flats approached slowly, wondering if Plum had caught some type of contagious disease. Soon, the earth pony was standing directly before his friend. He reached out a hoof to lift the unicorn's chin. Plum's eyelids suddenly shot up, his now-green eyes dancing merrily above a wicked grin. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Magnum's carriage rumbled slowly across the bridge that led to Fluttershy's cottage. The dinner had lasted another two hours, during which she contemplated yawning, sleeping, screaming, running, and murder, all in that order. However, she could finally see that the end was in sight. I'm... I'm not sure I've ever wanted to get away from another pony this badly before, Fluttershy realized. I shouldn't think such bad things about somepony else, though... Alright, I'll be as nice as I can until he leaves! "Th-thank you, for, um..." she began, "...for the n-nice evening." "It was fairly boring, if you ask me," Magnum said, glaring at her. Oh. So much for that... Finally, the carriage stopped in front of her house, and the pegasus wasted no time in getting out. "Good bye, have a good evening," she said politely before turning back to the door. She paused when she heard hoofsteps behind her. "Well? I don't have all night," Magnum stated. The carriage pulled away, leaving him behind. "I don't understand," Fluttershy said. "Why aren't y-you going with them?" "My servants will be back to pick me up in a few hours. I expect you to be very good, to make up for that god-awful dinner." "Wh-what do you m-m-mean?" She slowed backed away, but the stallion stepped forward to maintain their proximity. "I'm going to bed you, of course," Magnum told her. Wh-wh-wh-WHAT? "That's—I don't—but—" "And you have no choice in the matter. Now, let's go." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ When Luna left Twilight's library, she fully intended to return to Canterlot. She hadn't been lying, after all, about having important matters to attend to. However, the princess found her wings taking her in a different direction. If I recall Twilight's directions, Fluttershy lives this way, she thought absently. It cannot hurt just to check, right? However, as she approached the lone cottage that sat in close proximity to the Everfree Forest, she saw that not one, but two ponies stood outside, right next to each other. "That's right, her date," Luna muttered, before realizing that she recognized the stallion. "Hm, I know him from court. I should go now..." Instead of taking her own advice, she hovered in the air above the two, her body nearly invisible against the night sky. This is wrong! I shouldn't spy on her! The princess's actions betrayed her true wishes as she tuned her ears in to what they were saying. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ If I say 'no', then Magnum will definitely just leave, right? Fluttershy thought desperately. There's no way that he... "My patience is wearing thin," the unicorn said. "Do unlock the door so we can get this done with." "N-no." "I beg your pardon?" Fluttershy cleared her throat. "I-I said, 'no'." Magnum's brow descended into a deep scowl. "I already said that you have no choice—you will sleep with me. Now open that door or else I will—what?!" Something had just hit him lightly on the leg. He glanced down to find Angel, ready to deliver a second kick. The unicorn's magic encompassed the little rabbit and lifted him into the air. "Angel!" Fluttershy exclaimed. "Put him down!" "Will you do as I wish?" "I—" With her beloved Angel in danger, the fire vanished from the pegasus's resistance. "Okay..." "Good, then—" A sudden blast of lightning lit up the night sky. Dark clouds formed out of nothingness, and a powerful wind kicked into action. However, none of this was nearly as frightening or awe-inspiring as what slowly descended towards the two ponies. "Release the rabbit, cur, or meet thine end!" Luna boomed, the force of her voice nearly knocking Magnum off of his feet. Her eyes blazed with a pure-white light, and even though her body had become black as a void, she was perfectly visible. A startled Magnum immediately dropped Angel, who was caught up in his owner's embrace. "Who are—" the unicorn started indignantly, but the princess cut him off. "Daffodil Magnum, We have witnessed the crime thou hast committed." "Don't use my whole name!" he shrieked, looking around to see if anypony else had heard. Luna continued as if he hadn't spoken. "Thou shalt appear tomorrow at noon before Us and Our sister, in order to receive thy sentence. Failure to do so would not be wise." "I am a member of a very influential family," Magnum said. "If you leave now, I will forget thi—" "THOU DAREST THREATEN THE PRINCESS OF THE NIGHT?!" she bellowed, taking all of the wind out of his sails. More flashes of lightning brightened the dark sky. "If it is thy wish, We can give thee punishment here and now! However, know that thou hast commited a grevious wrong against fair Fluttershy, who is very dear to Us, and We will not be as merciful as would Princess Celestia..." Her sentence trailed off ominously. "Fine," the unicorn said in a clipped voice. "But this isn't the end. I'll make certain you regret this." He turned and walked away, in the direction of Ponyville, where he would find his servants and chariot. As soon as the noble vanished from sight, Luna allowed her appearance to return to normal. Her mane, which had been a blazing blue, once more mirrored the night sky. The clouds dissipated and the wind died down. "Art thou well?" she asked with concern evident in her tone. "Didst that fiend inflict any injury?" "Princess Luna, if you hadn't—he would've—I would've—" Fluttershy's eyes teared up and she squeezed Angel tightly. What do I do now? Luna thought frantically. What would a friend say? How would a friend act? Then she realized what the most important thing was. What does Fluttershy need? "Um, Fluttershy..." the princess started, uncertain of whichi words would be the best. "Canst thou tell Us... what dost thou require?" "Wh-what do I need?" the pegasus asked, sniffing. "Yes, what dost—do you need? How can I help you? You need but say it, and it shall be done." "Well, um, t-to start, let's just go inside..." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ An emaciated unicorn shambled out of the Everfree Forest, green eyes fixed on the ground in front of it. Where once Plum's mane had been a vibrant purple, it had gone white, and even fallen out in places. His body was wrinkled and his bones had become brittle. It was as if he had aged seventy years in the past few hours. "Thisss body isss weak," it hissed in a sibilant voice. "It ssshall not lasst much longer." "That filthy mongrel... why her sister ever allowed her back into the palace..." The Plum-thing's head snapped around towards the sound. It was a unicorn stallion, stomping down the dirt road. "And how does she know my name?! I swear, she'll regret this..." "Ahh...but thiss one..." the monster whispered. "Itsss hate... smellsss deliciousss..." It turned to meet its newest prey. Ch 6: In Which Fluttershy is Comforted, Luna Pursues, and Discord Dispenses JusticeLuna and Fluttershy sat inside the cottage, the alicorn trying her best to help the pegasus cheer up. "I must apologize," she said. "I have not had much experience comforting ponies in these situations." "That's alright. Um... just by being here, you're helping." Fluttershy gave the princess a tired smile. Think, Luna, think... "Can I get you something to drink?" Luna hopped to her feet and trotted into the kitchen. "A cup of tea would be very nice," the pegasus admitted. Immediately, the alicorn halted in her tracks. "Uh, heh heh, you probably do not want me to do that." She felt her face burning from embarrassment. "Why not?" "Well, you see, uh, earlier this evening, Twilight Sparkle tried to teach me how to make chocolate milk, and..." "What?!" Fluttershy exclaimed quietly. "Twilight was cooking?! Oh dear, oh my, are you alright? Is she alright? She didn't burn down the library again, did she?" "Nopony got hurt, and nothing burned," Luna said. "There were a lot of strangely-colored things flying through the air, though... But you see, if I cannot do something as simple as milk, then..." She realized that she had never, in all her long years of life, made her own beverage. She remembered pouring them, but never actually creating them. That... is pretty pathetic, she thought. "I understand," the pegasus said. She stood and joined her friend in the kitchen. "Here, I'll teach you how to do it." "Wait, you shouldn't have to do work!" Luna protested. "After what you went through—" "No, um, it's fine. I kinda want to do something to keep myself busy, um, if it's alright." The princess was surprised at how easily the yellow mare went about the task without magic. If Luna had tried to do it by hoof, then she would have likely blown up the kitchen. However, with a bit of simple instruction from a credible source (i.e. anypony who wasn't Twilight), she soon had a steaming mug filled with what appeared to be tea. "Um, so you were at Twilight's," the pegasus said while they cleaned up the area. "I was kind of wondering why you happened to be here... not that I'm ungrateful!" "Twilight told me that you were on a date, but I forgot and decided to fly by just to see if you were still awake. I am... I'm ashamed, but I eavesdropped on you for a few seconds. I did not actually grasp the situation until he threatened your bunny." "Y-you don't have to apologize," Fluttershy told her. "Things would have been worse otherwise—" A sudden pounding came from the door, and the yellow mare seized up. "Stay here," Luna said quietly. As silent as a shadow, she glided to the entrance and whipped it open. However, instead of an attacker, she found a nigh-hysterical Rarity. "Fluttershy! I— oh, Princess Luna!" the unicorn said. "Is Fluttershy— there you are!" She pushed past the princess and buried her yellow friend in a tight hug. "I'm sorry! I'm so sorry! It's all my fault!" "Um, Rarity? How did you know what happened?" Fluttershy asked, confusion clear on her face. "No offense to you, Princess," Rarity said, "but your voice carried clear down to Ponyville, and likely beyond! Why, the only reason the other girls aren't here as well is that they don't know the details that I do." With Rarity on the scene, the princess began to feel like she was out-of-place here. She needs to be alone with a good friend; I should not stay here any longer. "Well, Fluttershy, I shall take my leave now. I hope that you feel well soon, and know that I shall not let that cur off lightly." She turned to leave but was stopped by Fluttershy's voice. "Princess Luna?" she said, pushing herself free of the unicorn's embrace. "I mean, Luna. Th-thank you, for saving me and Angel." "Do not think on it. I would be a poor friend indeed if I had done nothing." "When—whenever you want, if you're, um, just flying by, I don't m-mind if you stop to say hi..." "Really?" Luna asked. Her face lit up with a bright smile. "I... I believe I shall do so. Th...thank you, and farewell." And with that, she spread her wings and departed into the cool night air. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ On a shelf behind Fluttershy sat a small statue of a turtle. It was fairly non-descript, save for one feature—it bore a single fang. The pegasus's gaze passed over it before she realized that she didn't know where she had gotten such an item. However, when she looked again, her puzzlement doubled. The statue was gone, as if it had teleported away. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Green eyes fixed on the alicorn who soared overhead. Normal ponies wouldn't have been able to detect her dark form against the night sky, but the monster possessed unnaturally keen vision. It could sense the power that she wielded, and it knew that it had to make that power its own. The creature now inhabited Magnum's skull, and the aged Plum had been left behind to perish. By accessing Magnum's memories, it learned everything its host already knew about this alicorn, this Princess Luna, and its desire doubled when it discovered that she was apparently immortal. "A body that will not age, that I can possessss forever..." it mused. Further digging taught the monster that its host was supposed to appear before the princess the very next day. A grotesque smile spread across Magnum's face as his feet were turned towards Canterlot, where the ultimate prize lay. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "That's terrible!" Twilight shouted. She grabbed hold of Fluttershy by the shoulders. "How are you feeling? Are you depressed? You aren't hurt, right? Right?!" By this point, she was shaking the poor mare. "Twi—light! I'm—fine! You—can—stop—sha—king—me—now!" "Oh, uh, whoops." The alicorn let go and stepped back quickly. "Heh heh, sorry..." Twilight arrived first thing in the morning, immediately after the rooster's call. She, too, had heard Luna's voice the night before, and after a number of hours had finally managed to get into contact with the dark princess to find out what the hay had actually happened. "You don't have to worry, I'm fine," Fluttershy said, still a little woozy. "Luna came by just in time." "What a terrible first date," Twilight muttered. "At least you don't have to deal with any more of those in the future, though." "Actually, I asked Rarity to help me get another one." "Wh-WHAT?" "I, um, I know that my date was a disaster, but it wasn't her fault. Luna told me last night that Magnum pays his servants to spread good rumors about him—that's why, when Rarity asked around, she was only told positive things." The pegasus took a slow sip of water. "I did ask her to keep it limited to ponies in Ponyville whose names I already know, though. I... think it's safer that way." "That's a decent idea,"" Twilight said. "But why don't you want to take a break? If it were me, I'd want to take it easy for at least a few days. You know, read a nice book, wrap up some side projects I have..." "I just... I think it's important to continue, is all." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The throne room of the alicorn princesses was empty, save for the princesses themselves and a few guards. Normally, ponies came in droves to seek favor from their rulers, but this was a unique occasion. "What do you plan to do, sister?" Luna asked quietly. "I haven't quite decided yet. First, I want to hear what Magnum has to say for himself." "I have no doubt that he shall lie to make it seem like he is the victim, and I the villain." Celestia stretched her wings out gracefully. "That may very well be the case, but he is still entitled to present his side of the story." "The noble Daffodil Magnum, your majesties!" shouted Hamfist. He pulled open a door and showed in the disgraced unicorn. Within seconds, Magnum stood before the princesses, his eyes cast on the ground. His mane had begun to go gray, and his body seemed on the verge of collapse. Why does he appear to have aged since last night? the dark princess wondered. "Daffodil Magnum," Celestia stated, "you have been called here on charges of sexual misconduct—" "Call a rose a rose," Luna hissed at her sister. "It was attempted rape. Do not sugar-coat the crime with sterile words!" "I understand your anger, but this is how it must be done. Don't worry, justice will certainly be served." In a louder voice, she continued. "You have been called here on charges of sexual misconduct. As per Equestrian law, you shall be given this chance to present your defense, and then a sentence will be passed. The floor is yours." Magnum said nothing. "Does this mean you have nothing to say?" the sun princess asked. The unicorn didn't even acknowledge that he was being spoken to; this final insult pushed Luna's anger over the boiling point. "Look at your princess when she speaks to you!" she snapped. He let out a hacking laugh. "Very well." The stallion's head lifted up, and Luna's sight was captured by an emerald gaze. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The monster felt the thrill of victory when Luna's vision fell on its face; it sent its insidious mental tendrils out to capture her in its web, thinking that its success was assured. However, as soon as the reaching tentacles encountered the princess's mind, it knew that something was wrong. Try as it might, the beast could not pierce the barriers surrounding her being. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Almost immediately, Luna felt the attempted intrusion, and her eyes narrowed dangerously. "That is no normal pony!" she rumbled deeply. "Guards, look not into its eyes, else it shall posses thee!" The alicorn's wings flared and she leaped towards the monster, horn-first. Magnum's feet barely managed to move him out of the way to save him from being impaled by a furious goddess. However, the creature was not without its own power. Or rather, Magnum's power. The noble stallion was a relatively powerful magician, and it showed from the fireball that shot from his horn. Luna captured it inside a spherical shield so that it detonated harmlessly, but unfortunately, by that time, Magnum had already escaped past the guards, who were following Luna's command to avoid making eye-contact. "Luna—" said Celestia, but the darker alicorn interrupted her. "Leave this to Us," she said, throwing her sister a confident grin. "The court is thy specialty, but in martial matters, We daresay We are thy better." "Pssh, quit bragging and go get him." She needn't have bothered even say it—Luna was already out the door. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ In her royal bedroom's royal bed, Princess Cadence slept in with her husband. Suddenly, she felt a terrible sense of dread and sat straight up. "What..." Shining Armor paused to release a jaw-cracking yawn. "...what's wrong?" The princess shivered as a cold feeling ran down her spine. "I just had some kind of premonition. Something awful has happened." "What?!" the unicorn exclaimed. "Do you know what it is?! Where did it happen?! Is anypony in danger?!" "...I think somepony finally figured out what Luna's raunchy constellation really is." Shining rolled his eyes and dropped back, earning a disappointed pout from his wife. "Hey," she said, "this is serious! Next time I see her, I'll never hear the end of it!" "Honey, go back to sleep." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The chase led Luna through the halls of the palace at a speed that would have left any other pony bent over, panting from the exertion. However, Luna wasn't "any other" pony. Instead, she was right on Magnum's heels. The dark-purple glow of her magic reached out to grab the fleeing stallion's leg, and for a second it seemed like he would be apprehended, but at the last moment his own magic whipped out and slapped her's away. The force of the spell exceeded that which a normal unicorn should have been able to generate, a fact that gave Luna pause. Whatever monster has taken control of Daffodil's body must be augmenting his magic, she realized. In the end, it didn't matter, because the contest was decided by Magnum's lack of knowledge of the palace layout; he ran straight into a dead end. Luna realized her foe's dilemma and began to slowly move in on him. Once again the creature stared at her and tried to invade her thoughts, and like before, she easily repelled it. It looked around desperately for some route of escape. Finally, its gaze landed on a small grate in the floor. Something inky and black slithered out of Magnum's ear and sped towards the tiny opening. While the stallion collapsed in a heap, Luna lunged forward in an attempt to block the getaway route, but it was to no avail—the thing had gotten away. Instead of wasting time trying to hunt down the elusive creature, the alicorn instead decided to take measures to make future possessions as difficult for it as possible. "Guard!" she said to a nearby pony. "Take this message to your superior and see to it that it is also spread to all other ponies residing in the palace. 'Instruct your mares and stallions to not gaze into deep shadows if they can avoid it. If you see a shadow moving of its own volition, do not look at it. If you see a pony with green eyes, avert your own and inform one of the princesses.' That is all." "Yes, princess!" The guard saluted and galloped off to obey the order. "Luna, what happened?" Princess Celestia serenely walked up to stand beside her sister. "Sister... It appears that our foe is some type of phantom, or perhaps a shape-shifter. It escaped through an opening too small for even a foal." "So you're saying that it could be anywhere." Luna rubbed her forehead, where she could already feel a massive headache forming. "This...thing...Something about it seems terribly familiar." "That's because I created it." Both princesses flinched in surprise at the voice, which came from above. They looked up to find Discord, sitting on the ceiling, staring back down at them. "If you two weren't so forgetful, you'd remember my specters." "AHA!" Luna exclaimed. "I knew you could not be trusted!" "Easy, girl," the dragonequis said, patting the alicorn on the head. "I'm not the one who unleashed it this time. I didn't even know any of those things survived. I swear, you jump down my throat at the slightest provocation." "Are you going to help us capture this 'specter'?" Celestia asked gravely. "Well, I guess I could... It's not like either of you stand a chance on your own." He pointedly ignored the glare the dark princess threw his way. "First, I'm going to need to see what I can learn from this stallion." With a snap of his fingers, a wheelbarrow appeared out of nowhere. Discord picked up the unconscious Magnum and dropped him carelessly into the basket. "I shall go with you," Luna said immediately. "I think I can handle this without cute widdle Wuna's help," he taunted. Celestia put her hoof on the growling alicorn's shoulder. "Luna, don't lose your temper. And Discord, stop provoking her." "Such a stick in the mud..." he mumbled as he wheeled the cart away. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A spot of darkness navigated its way between the pipes in the castle's walls, searching for a place where it could be reasonably safe. It already knew why it hadn't been able to infiltrate the blue cow's mind—she had anticipated such an attack, and likely maintained mental defenses at all times for just such an occassion. It was a combination of a will as powerful as steel, and potent magic. The creature realized that possessing such a creature would require more work than could be accomplished in a mere day. And that only made it want her more. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Magnum's eyes shot open and he groaned in pain; the back of his head was throbbing for some reason. Looking around, the stallion took in his surroundings. He was in what looked to be a guest room at a fairly well-off establishment. How did I get here? he wondered. The last thing I remember... being assaulted by a princess... and those green eyes... "Well good morning, dear fellow!" The unicorn yelped and jumped, only to find himself nose-to-nose with some strange amalgamation of multiple different creatures. Discord sighed and shook his head. "Oh don't be like that, I'm not even trying to scare you right now!" "You-you're that...thing... that the princess keeps around," Magnum said disdainfully. "Discord." "You guessed it right on the first try! Congratulations! Want a cookie?" "Spare me your prattle. Why have you brought me here?" "Some fiendish abomination possessed you, and then attacked the princesses. I brought you here to find out what you could tell me about that." Discord examined his fingernails, as if bored with this whole process. "I remember nothing!" Magnum protested. "I only now just woke up!" "Of course you don't remember anything," the dragonequis said matter-of-factly. "That was just the lie that I concocted for the princesses, a pretense so that I could get you alone to have a friendly chat! Now, what I really want to talk about..." He turned to the stallion with a look in his reptilian eyes that suggested that his intentions were anything but 'friendly'. He flexed his claws menacingly as the temperature in the room plummeted. "...do tell, what's this I hear about you and my dear, sweet, little Fluttershy?" Author's Note And he was never heard from again. Ch 7: In Which Fluttershy Has a Revelation, and Luna Has an ArgumentFluttershy trudged down the street to where her fourth date waited. Her thoughts drifted back, remembering the dates she had been on over the past month; Rarity took the liberty of planning them, but only after obtaining the her friend's approval on the chosen of stallion. "We can't let anything like...that... happen again," the unicorn had said, in regard to the fiasco with Magnum. For the second date, Fluttershy met with one of the weather team's pegasi, a stallion recommended by Rainbow Dash. The yellow mare couldn't help but admit that he was a very nice pony, and he had shown definite interest in her, but the feelings weren't reciprocated. The stallion was clearly disappointed, but remained admirably courteous to the end. Stallion number three had been nearly the same. He had recently gone through a very public falling-out with his (ex) marefriend, but Twilight affirmed that his character was sound. For the entirety Fluttershy's date with him, he dropped frequent hints that he found the yellow pegasus fascinating, but like before, she found it impossible to view the poor stallion in a romantic light. Since then, Fluttershy's couldn't help but wonder why success eluded her. What was wrong with those two ponies? she thought fretfully each night before going to bed. Or... is it something wrong with me? Despite her negative thoughts, she put on a brave face when Rarity told her that a fourth stallion had been lined up. The unicorn wouldn't give any details on the mysterious pony, other than to say Fluttershy already knew him well. Well, after tonight, I'll just tell Rarity that it's no use, the pegasus thought sadly, coming back to the present. I'm destined to be alone forever... Her musings were interrupted when she ran, nose-first, into something very solid. "Fluttershy?" asked the thing she had collided with. "Are ya okay?" She looked up into the concerned eyes of Applejack's brother, Big Macintosh. "Big Mac," she said, slightly confused. "I'm fine, but...why are you here?" She realized that she stood in front of the restaurant where she would be eating. "Well, that Rarity told me to be here to meet some friend of hers. Ah reckon it's a date or somethin." What?! I'm dating Big Macintosh?! "Uh uh uh um..." "Somethin' wrong?" "W-w-w-well, I-I'm, th-that is, I th-th-think that she m-m-meant m-me." This is terrible! Big Mac's a good friend! How do I let him know I'm not interested? Oh no, what do I do? "Huh. Well, ain't that interestin'," Mac said, seemingly unfazed. "I guess we should sit down, then." He politely held the door open for the yellow mare. Rarity and I are going to have such a talk when I see her next... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ In a bush right outside the restaurant, Rarity suddenly sneezed, causing her to nearly drop her binoculars. "Hmm, I hope that doesn't mean somepony's thinking bad things about me..." "Who's there?" demanded a nearby voice. The branches parted to reveal Applejack, who had been hiding in the very same bush. "Rarity! Are you spyin' on mah brother?!" "I'm just here to ensure Fluttershy's well-being," the unicorn retorted. "After that disaster with Magnum, it's my solemn responsibility to look after her, no matter how much I trust the stallion! Besides, aren't you doing the exact same thing?" "...Fine, ya caught me. But the only reason Ah'm here is to make sure Big Mac doesn't stick his hoof in his mouth!" "And why would he do such a thing?" "Don't tell me ya haven't noticed," Applejack said. "That big doofus's had a crush on Fluttershy for years. Iffen he did somethin' to mess this up, he'd be devastated! As his kin, Ah gotta do what Ah can to help." "So it seems we both have noble intentions. Well then, it's decided!" Rarity clapped her hooves and stood quickly. "What's decided?" "We'll get ourselves a table in there so that we can keep track of their progress, of course!" The earth pony tossed her friend a doubtful glance. "Isn't that a bit too obvious? There ain't no way they won't see us." "And that, dear Applejack, is why I prepared disguises! It's a good thing for you that I have an extra." "...Why do Ah feel like Ah'm not goin' to like this?" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Cow!" "Cad!" "Half-wit!" "Insufferable bed-sore!" Celestia walked quickly into the banquet hall to find Luna and Discord nose-to-nose and in the midst of a battle of insults. "What are you two doing?" she demanded. "Here I am, minding my own business, when our sheltered Princess of the Night decides that she has the authority to tell me what to do!" "That is because We do have the authority to command thee!" Luna shot back. "And Our only request was that thou cleanse thy mess! It is thine own creation that is running rampant, after all." "How many times do I have to say this before it sinks into your thick blue skull?" he said. "I built that thing a couple-thousand years ago, then promptly forgot about its existence! I can't remember what I ate for lunch, how do you expect me to remember anything about a stupid trifle like that specter?" "For the life of Us, We cannot tell what it is that Fluttershy sees in thee." "As if I care what some moronic winged moose thinks of me," the dragonequis said with a snort. He realized immediately that he could have chosen better words, due to the way the entire hall darkened; a seething Luna's body drew in nearly all of the afternoon light streaming in through the room's majestic windows. "Choose thy words with care when speaking of Fluttershy," she rumbled dangerously. Just as Celestia opened her mouth to intervene, Discord spoke up. "Pssh, I was talking about you, Miss Moronic Winged Moose, not that unfortunately timid pegasus. Although... now I'm wondering why you're getting so angry over her." For a few seconds he stared into the dark princess's eyes, searching for something. The dragonequis apparently found what he wanted, because his face lit up with mirth and he collapsed to the floor, holding his ribs; peals of his laughter echoed through the castle. "What dost thou find so humorous?" "HAHAHA—oh, noth—heheh—nothing." Discord wiped the tears out of his eyes and stood, still snickering. "It's just that...ah, haha... wittle itty bitty Wuna's in wuv!" With that, his body coiled in on itself and he disappeared into thin air. In Discord's absence, heavy silence pervaded the atmosphere. The two alicorn princesses glanced at each other uneasily. "Luna," Celestia said finally, "is that true?" The other princess took a moment to gather her thoughts. As she calmed, her language moved into a more modern dialect. "It is true that I am very fond of Fluttershy, but..." "But what?" "... I do not know; I have never loved before, so I know not how I would feel. However, I feel that Discord is just saying it to annoy me." "So you don't love anypony?" the white alicorn asked. "I do not believe so." Celestia sighed deeply. "That's a shame... It's a wonderful feeling." Suddenly, a puff of green smoke bloomed in mid-air and a tightly rolled scroll fell to the ground between the two mares. "It seems that Twilight Sparkle has a message for you," Luna said. "I shall take my leave so you—" "No, Luna, the letter isn't for me. It has your name on it." The dark princess received correspondence on such a rare basis that her heart nearly skipped a beat. She eagerly accepted the message, coming close to tearing the parchment in her haste to get to the words inside. Dear Luna, I am writing to invite you to once again spend time with my friends and me for an evening, three days from now. If this is agreeable to you, you can let me know with a letter sent straight to Spike. I'm sure Princess Celestia would be happy to share the spell with you that will allow you to do so. Thank you, and I hope to see you in three days! Your Friend, Twilight Sparkle P.S. This time, I asked the girls if they were free before deciding on a set date! See, I can learn from my mistakes! Celestia couldn't help but grin at the way her sister's eyes lit up as she read the letter out loud. "If you want, I can show you how to send scrolls to Spike right now." The halls reverberated with the sound of Luna's subsequent, "Huzzah!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Ah knew Ah wasn't goin' to like this!" Applejack and Rarity sat together at a table squeezed into a corner of the room. Both of them had ridiculously large-and-frilly hats perched upon their heads. "What do you mean? These bonnets are the height of fashion!" "Maybe if yer ma dropped y'all on yer head when y'all was little," the earth pony said with a snort. "Plus, aren't these s'posed to be disguises? We stand out more with 'em than without!" "Tell me, would Fluttershy or Macintosh ever guess that you would willingly wear something like that?" Rarity asked. "I... ok fine, ya win this round." "Good! Now hush, let's see if we can hear what they're saying!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ On the other side of the room, Fluttershy and Big Macintosh meekly poked at their salads. The conversation up until this point hadn't developed beyond "yes or no" questions, and both ponies were beginning to wonder if it wouldn't just be better to run screaming from the restaurant. Finally, the pegasus reached the point beyond which she couldn't stand the tension. "M-Mac, I'm sorry, b-b-but I d-don't think this is a g-g-g-good idea." "...Yup," he said, "Ah was 'fraid you'd say that." "P-please, don't feel bad! You're wonderful, it's all m-me!" "...Yup," Mac said again, but his voice lacked conviction. As the stallion's expression fell, so too did Fluttershy's heart. I can't just let him feel awful for something that isn't his fault. I suppose I have no other choice... "Um, M-Mac, can you—can you keep a secret?" His face showed confusion, but he nodded anyway. "Um, well I... oh, how do I say this... I, um, I d-don't like... I don't like..." "What don't ya like?" he asked. "Red hair? Yokes? Apples? Charminly rustic accents? It's fine, Ah don't—" "Stallions!" she blurted out quietly. "I d-don't like stallions!" "Huh? What's wrong with..." Fluttershy could have sworn that she heard a *ding* as realization dawned in the stallion's eyes. "Oh. OH!" "I d-didn't mean to waste your time..." "Naw, it's fine." "I'm still j-just trying to fi-figure it all out for m-myself." "Don't worry yourself. If anythin', it's a load off mah chest. Ain't nothin' Ah can do 'bout bein' a stallion, that's for sure." The pegasus gave him a tiny smile. "I'm glad you're feeling better..." She stood to leave. "I'll—I'll pay the bill on my way out, so—" "Now hold on there." Macintosh touched her lightly on the shoulder to keep her from departing. "There ain't no reason to leave. We can still be pals, can't we?" "I..." Fluttershy returned slowly to her seat. "Yes, we can!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "There," Rarity said with satisfaction, "they're getting on famously!" "Fer once, Ah have to agree with ya," Applejack replied reluctantly. Ever since Fluttershy had stood, like she was leaving, she and Macintosh had been far more talkative towards each other. It seemed like "Mission: Get Fluttershy a Good Stallion" was a rousing a success. "I believe that our presences are no longer required." The unicorn pushed her stool back and stood. "Macintosh seems to have the situation well in-hoof, wouldn't you say?" "Ah... Ah guess he's goin' to be fine." "Very good, I'm glad you think so. Now! Who wants to get some ice cream?" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A giddy Princess Luna dropped onto her bed and waved her hooves in the air. "So many years," she said, "and finally, I'm being invited to 'hang out' with a group!" "...wittle itty bitty Wuna's in wuv!" Discord's words floated through Luna's mind, severely dampening her excitement. Hmph, love. The very notion is ridiculous. But you do have strong feelings towards the mare, a dissenting voice told her. Yes, but merely because she's only my second friend, the princess argued. I am certain that I will feel the same towards Twilight's other friends when I meet them! Maybe, but if that was true, then wouldn't you also feel the same towards Twilight herself? Luna had a more difficult time finding an answer to that. She is—Twilight Sparkle is different. The voice chuckled. Do you really believe what you're thinking? Yes! I—yes! Fluttershy is a good friend, nothing more! I would never wish for anything beyond that! You do realize that you're arguing with a strange voice in your head, right? That type of behavior can get you committed, you stupid cow. Stupid cow...? The princess's eyes narrowed as she realized just who she had been mentally sparring with. "Discord!" she barked. "Show yourself!" A tiny form emerged from the depths of Luna's billowing mane. "Phew, the inside of your head is certainly cramped," Discord said. "Not a lot of room, just like I thought. Truth be told, I was beginning to get claustrophobic." She whipped her head suddenly, sending the little dragonequis tumbling to the ground, where she trapped him under a hoof. "You try my patience," she growled. "If you value your continued good health, it is my suggestion that you leave me be." "Bah, you really need to learn how to lighten up." His body became paper-thin and slipped out from under the princess's weight. "It's not like I'm just fabricating this 'love' stuff off the top of my head. Trust me, acceptance is the first step to moving on!" A wicked smile spread across Luna's face. "I hear that dragonequis steak is particularly fine this time of year." A dark-blue glow encompassed her horn. "Why don't we journey to the kitchens and find out—" "I assure you, that won't be necessary. I think I can take a hint." He exploded in a shower of confetti and was gone. "Pfft, that creature is a pox upon this land," the princess said disdainfully. She made to return to the bed, but paused when she found that a white box now occupied her place. A piece of paper on top bore the words, in curvy writing, For Luna. "Where did this come from?" Any other pony would have been immediately suspicious of a gift that appeared out of nowhere. In fact, most other ponies would expect there to be a pie inside, sitting on a coiled spring, just waiting to be launched into the face of whoever opened it. The guileless Luna never stood a chance. Face dripping in whipped cream, strawberry filling, and pie crust, she bellowed so loudly that her voice carried all the way to Ponyville, and likely beyond. "DISCOOORD!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Diissscoooooorrrddd..." Fluttershy and Big Mac's ears swivelled as the eerie voice floated through the air. "What in tarnation..." "Oh dear, I hope Luna doesn't hurt him too badly," the pegasus mumbled. The two ponies stood at the gate to Sweet Apple Acres, where they said their farewells before parting ways. "Well, thank ya for a fun time," Big Mac said. "Ah hope it weren't too awkward." "Oh not at all, I'm just glad your feelings aren't hurt." "Yer a kind pony. Some mare's goin' to be mighty lucky to have you." Fluttershy's mind froze. "A-a m-m-mare?" "Er, well, yeah," the stallion said. "Ah just reckon, if ya ain't into stallions ...well, who else is there besides mares?" "That's—why—you—" The pegasus stuttered while her mind tried to assimilate this new information; a wide smile grew across her face as it sank in. "Thank you, Mac! Thank you thank you thank you!" She gave him a quick hug, then turned and pranced happily away. "Yer welcome? Ah don't get it," he muttered, waving briefly before moving towards the farmhouse, where his sister likely sat waiting for him to tell her how things had gone. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Hee, mares, heehee! Why didn't I think of that?" Fluttershy said in a cheery voice. "I'm so happy!" But, what'll the other girls think? I'll tell them, of course! I tell them everything! But... this is so embarrassing to talk about... The idea of having a chat about sexuality with her best friends caused a bright blush to form on her cheeks. I can't keep this a secret forever, but... maybe just a little longer. Ch 8: In Which Pinkie Returns, Fluttershy Avoids Talking, and Luna Gets Overly DepressedThree days later, Luna once more alighted in front of the Ponyville library. "I seem to be coming here quite often, recently," she mused. "Not that that's a bad thing, I mean." I wonder if Fluttershy has arriv—no, it does not matter! We're friends! Friends! Nothing more! To think anything else is— "Um, h-hi, Luna." "UWAHAhaha!" the princess shrieked, spinning defensively and adopting a fighting stance. Her face burned with embarrassment when she saw that it was just Fluttershy who had come up behind her. "Erm, *cough*, good evening, Fluttershy! How farest thou?" "Happy that you're here," the pegasus admitted. "I-I'm sorry to have frightened you." "Do not fear, thou didst not truly alarm Us! That—it was merely a move We have been practicing!" Curses, why can I not speak normally? "It is good to see th—you." "I thought I heard voices out here," said Twilight, poking her head past the now-open door. "C'mon in, everypony else is waiting!" The moment Luna stepped into the room, all noise cut off. Rarity, Applejack, and even Rainbow Dash (although she tried to hide it) all stared at the newcomer with uncertainty in their eyes. "Greetings?" Luna said nervously. She threw on the most charming smile that she could muster. The tension in the room was so taut that a knife could have cut it. Finally, Rainbow broke the atmosphere. "So, um... have you ever heard of the Wonderbolts?" "Rainbow! What makes ya think the princess'll care about that?" Applejack snapped. Once the first question had been asked, all reservations were discarded almost immediately. Twilight re-introduced the mares to the princess, and they began to ply her with questions. Rainbow was by far the most inquisitive of the bunch. Earlier, Twilight had mentioned to her how Luna was well-known as the general of Equestria's armies, and the pegasus's thirst for more knowledge had only sharpened over time. "Technically I am still the leader of the grand Equestrian army, but it is an empty title," Luna explained. "There has not been any need for such a force in decades, and thus the army only consists of the castle guard." "But still," Rainbow said, "you probably know all sorts of cool fighting moves and stuff!" "Well, I... yes, I do know quite a bit about things pertaining to combat." A full hour passed before Luna realized that one mare was missing. "Twilight, is there not another pony who is part of your group? Pinkie Pie, the element of laughter, if I remember." "Yeah, that's... we're not really sure where Pinkie has been—she just disappeared a month ago. I'm actually getting a litle worr—" The doorbell cut the young princess off. "Ah got it," Applejack said, trotting to the door and pulling it open. "What can Ah—Pinkie!" The mare in question stood in the doorway, her face sporting a passive expression. "Pinkie! We were just talking about you!" "Where have you been?" "What have you been up to?" "C'mon in, siddown and tell us what ya've been doin'!" As the pink mare serenely took a seat, Luna leaned towards Fluttershy. "Is she not well known for always smiling and being joyful? Why, then, is her expression so bland?" "I noticed that too," the pegasus whispered back. "I hope nothing's wrong." "Don't worry, Fluttershy, I'm fine," Pinkie said, apparently having heard what their quiet exchange. "I just spent the past couple weeks in the mountains, training under a master in the ways of parate." Twilight frowned. "You mean 'karate'?" "No, silly, I mean 'parate'. I learned that the true party master keeps her emotions on the inside. I'll be right back; I have to go to the little fillies' room." "This is bad, girls," Twilight said as soon as Pinkie left. Rarity frowned in confusion. "Why do you say that?" "You know how Pinkie is always acting... hyper? I can't think of a better word... Anyway, what would happen if she restrained all of that energy?" "I don't get what you mean," Rainbow said. Applejack coughed to get everypony's attention. "Ah think Ah understand... If she's not lettin' the 'hyper' out, then it'll build up like crazy, so that when she does let it out, it'll be a lot stronger than usual." "Exactly! You know, AJ, I think you've got a bit of a scientist in you..." Hoofsteps announced Pinkie's return. "Now," she said, "shall we get this party started?" Nopony saw her move, but a bright pink flash lit the room, blinding all present. As soon as their vision returned, they gasped in amazement. Streamers hung from the ceiling in intricate patterns. At least a dozen assorted types of food lay on a table that had not previously been in the library. Balloons floated in the air, games sat open and ready to play, a bright-red punch swirled in its glass bowl... It was too much to have been done by an earth pony in just the blink of an eye. "I never..." Luna started, gazing blankly at the festive array. "When did... this is..." "This is Pinkie Pie," Twilight provided helpfully, as if that explained everything. "Actually, I kinda like this! Usually there's more of a mess for me to clea—" "I FORGOT THE CONFETTI!" Pinkie shrieked happily. Explosions of color appeared at the ceiling, and what must have been a forest's worth of multi-colored confetti floated down. Miraculously, none of it contaminated the food or beverages. "Why did I say that?" the purple alicorn moaned. "Of course there's a mess. There's always a mess!" Rainbow saw the party master grin to herself while bouncing in place. "Hey, Pinks, I thought you were trying to be emotionless, or something." "Oh I was, but that got so boring!" she chirped. The next few hours were some of the happiest that Luna could remember. She talked, she laughed, and she joked, and the whole time, Fluttershy sat beside her. They conversed with each other constantly, sharing opinions and ideas, and generally enjoying each other's presence. The alicorn found that her friend had plenty of insight, and that she noticed quite a lot—all one needed to do was listen. "Um, you've got some..." the pegasus said, pointing at Luna's cheek, "...you've got some icing on your face." "Oh, Luna, I just remembered!" Twilight said. "Did you have any luck finding whatever creature it was that attacked you and Princess Celestia?" The dark princess's face sobered. "Alas, the specter has eluded our best efforts. Likely, it is not even in Canterlot anymore. In fact..." Her eyes widened, as if disturbed by a troubling thought. "Its goal was to possess my body, but it is possible that any alicorn would satisfy its needs. Tell me, how learned are you in magic that defends the mind?" "I understand the basics, but I've never tried to apply them..." Luna sighed sadly. "It is regrettable, but I believe it to be very important that I teach you how to properly shield yourself from mental invasion." "Right now?" "I'm afraid so." "I... I understand." Twilight turned to her other friends, eyes immediately fixing on the disappointed look that Fluttershy wore. "Um, girls—" "It's ok!" Pinkie said. "We'll be alright until you're done!" Luna and her fellow princess separated themselves from the rest of the group. "Now," she began, "the most important thing to remember is that you must maintain this spell constantly. Never release it, even when sleeping. Do you understand?" "I—I think so." "Very well. To cast it, you must first clear your mind, then..." Her horn glowed and she wove the magic into exactly the form she desired. "...just like so." Twilight imitated Luna's example, and on the very first try, successfully created a barrier to protect her thoughts. "Whoa, this is... I can already feel it sapping my strength! It's going to be tiring, keeping this up all the time, isn't it?" "Unfortunately, that is the case," Luna replied. "However, it will become easier, both as you get used to it and as your own abilities improve. If you're ready, I am going to test the integrity of your spell." When Twilight nodded, Luna's pupils vanished, and the purple alicorn felt something bump against her barrier. Suddenly, the shield was rent asunder and cast aside before Luna's voice echoed through her head. As you can see, it is not perfect yet. However, I judge that your skill is adequate for the time being. "Is there anything else I need to know about this?" "There is one thing to keep in mind," the dark mare said. "The strength of your barrier is dependent upon your resolve. If you have a strong mind, then the shield will be strong as well. However, if you lose the will to protect yourself, then an enemy will have no problem at all in breaking through." "Wait, does that mean that the spell fails if I get really sad? That's a pretty silly weakness, if you ask me." Luna opened her mouth to elaborate further when, from across the library, she heard Pinkie say, "Wait, what?! Fluttershy, you've been dating?!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Fluttershy watched as Luna and Twilight held their hushed conversation. From time to time, their horns would light up, making it clear that they were casting spells. For the first time in her life, the pegasus found herself wishing that she, too, had the ability to use unicorn magic. Perhaps then Luna would take her into a corner and— ...What? Fluttershy wondered. I've never thought something like that before! Am I... jealous of Twilight? It did make sense—after all, the youngest princess got to spend quite a bit of time with Luna. Even more, Twilight was the dark princess's very first friend. But why does that even matter? Luna's my friend anyway, no matter what Twilight is to her. I have no reason to be jealous of anypony. She forcibly banished all thoughts of jealousy from her mind. "So, Fluttershy, I haven't gotten to see you in the past few days," Rarity said, dragging the pegasus out of her reverie. "How did your big date go?" "Wait, what?!" Pinkie exclaimed, jaw dropping. "Fluttershy, you've been dating?!" Luna visibly flinched, but only the yellow mare noticed it, so absorbed were the rest of them in her answer. "Um, I-I have..." Fluttershy said. She didn't enjoy being in the spotlight under normal conditions, and the current topic only made things worse. "Who?! When?! Where?! Why?!" Pinkie stood nose-to-nose with the pegasus. "A b-bunch of p-po-ponies, over the p-past few weeks." "Pinkie, you're making her nervous!" the white unicorn said admonishingly. "Let her breath, at least." "Oh. Sorry..." "It's okay." Fluttershy became suddenly aware of Luna's presence. The alicorn, who hadn't made a move to cross the room, didn't say anything, but she was clearly listening. I shouldn't discuss this where she'll hear me... "But do tell us the details of your date," Rarity continued. "It would be wonderful if you and Mac got together, after all." "Why do you say that?" Rainbow asked. "Well, he is one incredible hunk of a stallion—" "Hey! That's mah brother y'all are talkin' about!" "That doesn't change the truth, dear." "Um..." I can't tell them how it really went, not yet! But I can't lie and make something up either. What do I say, what do I say... "It was... n-nice." For a moment, nopony said a thing, and only after a very uncomfortable few seconds of staring did Rainbow voice what was on everypony's mind. "'Nice'?" "Yes. 'Nice'." There, problem solved! she thought proudly. "Funny, that's what Big Mac said when I asked him," Applejack mused. Fluttershy glanced at Luna, strangely nervous over what she thought of it. "L-Luna...?" "I must thank all of you," Luna said, not even looking at the pegasus. "I know that you gathered here to make me feel welcome, and I appreciate it greatly. I hope that you consider me a friend, as I do all of you. However, I just recalled that there is something in Canterlot that requires my immediate attention. Again, thank you, and farewell." The silence was pregnant as she abruptly walked out, shutting the door behind her with a little more force than was necessary. "What crawled up her plot?" Rainbow asked. "Rainbow!" Fluttershy said in a raised voice, which surprised everypony. She put her nose right up against the other pegasus's. "That is not how we talk about our friends! Think about how you would like it if we said things like that about you when you weren't here!" "I... I guess I wouldn't..." "Luna is our friend, and we should trust her! If she says that she has work to do, then that's the truth!" She suddenly noticed how all her other friends were staring at her, and she cringed backwards. "W-wait, that's... I m-mean... oh, I didn't have to be so angry about it... I'm sorry..." "Nah, it's alright," the blue pegasus said bashfully. "That was a pretty rude thing for me to say, so..." "Hey, let's all cheer up!" Pinkie shouted. "Nopony meant anything bad, so we can forget about it! Now, howsabout we eat up some of this cake..." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Shadows littered the road that connected Ponyville and Canterlot. The wind blew lightly, causing the tree branches to dance. However, one spot of murky darkness moved separately from the myriad shadows. It slithered from tree trunk to tree trunk, searching for the prize that it knew had to be here. It knew that it was close. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Luna flew through the night sky, performing acrobatic stunts in order to blow off some steam. She knew that if she exerted herself, she wouldn't have to worry about thinking. She wouldn't have to worry about her. The princess turned downwards and dived, spinning in a corkscrew as she plummeted towards the ground. Only at the last moment did she open her wings and pull up, thus avoiding meeting her end as an alicorn pizza. Luna felt her muscles begin to tire, but she refused to take a break. If she stopped, her mind would start moving again, and that was to be avoided. She conjured a series of glowing hoops in mid-air and proceeded to navigate her way through them at high velocity. The hoops began to move, which meant that more coordination would be required in order to fly through them. Luna didn't even pause as she pushed herself to her limits. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A pair of eyes, watching from afar, narrowed, before the owner turned and darted away in a rainbow-colored flash. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Another fine evening with our friends," Rarity reminisced to Fluttershy as they walked together. "And I'm so glad to have met Luna at last! She's simply marvelous! Such grace—such poise—such confidence!" Her eyes sparkled with admiration. You don't have to tell me... Fluttershy thought. "She seemed unhappy when she left, though." "Perhaps it was just because she had to leave early? You would know better than I." The unicorn nudged her friend playfully. "You kept her to yourself all evening!" "I did?!" The pegasus's face grew apologetic. "I-I'm so sorry, I d-d-didn't mean to! I was j-just—" "It's fine, dear, I was just teasing," Rarity assured her. "Although it's true that you two were nearly insep—" "Hey!" shouted Rainbow, landing between the two mares. "Rarity, you mind if I borrow Fluttershy?" "We're nearly at the boutique anyway, so feel free! Good night!" She waved farewell as her friends took to the sky. "Wh-what did you want me for?" Fluttershy asked. "C'mon, there's something I gotta show you." Within a few minutes, the two pegasi arrived over a field along the borders of the Everfree Forest. "I'm not..." Fluttershy started, confused. "What am I looking for?" "Over there," Rainbow answered while pointing at a low-hanging cloud. "See who's sitting on that?" "I don't—" The yellow mare gasped when she realized that it was Luna, lounging around after having told her friends that she was leaving to do work. "Rainbow, I—I guess you were right." "Naw, that's not it," the other pegasus said. "I didn't bring you here to get her in trouble or anything. Look, see how exhausted she is? She's sweating and panting like crazy!" Sure enough, Fluttershy could see that Rainbow was right. "You didn't see her before, but she was going through one hay of a workout." "I don't understand..." "Isn't it obvious?! Something's bothering her! Look, whenever I get down about something—not that I ever let anything get me down—I do things that'll tire me out. It keeps me from having to think about whatever the problem is." Fluttershy put a hoof up to her chin thoughtfully. "And you're saying that Luna did all that exercise just so she wouldn't worry about something?" "Yup." "Then—why did you need me, if you already know all this?" "Come on, are you gonna make me explain everything?" Rainbow whined. "I may not be the most 'touchy-feely' pony in Ponyville, but even I could see that she's a lot closer to you than to me." "So..." "So, you have the best chance of cheering her up!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Out on the cloud, Luna sprawled on her back while her chest rose and fell heavily. A full hour of intense flying left her with almost no energy, but unfortunately, as soon as the workout ended, her thoughts turned themselves back on. Fluttershy is dating... they whispered in her head. Dating a stallion... a real hunk of a stallion... "Stop—*pant*—it—*wheeze*—" Luna ordered. She belatedly noticed the presence of tears on her cheeks. She's dating... their date was nice...they're very happy together... "L-Luna?" When she heard her name, the princess scrambled to her hooves, nearly falling from the cloud in the process. She managed to stand up straighten her tiara before regarding the visitor; although she hadn't been expecting anypony to find her, she was still surprised to find that it was Fluttershy. "Ah, no! This isn't—I'm not—" She sighed sadly. "You caught me... I-I don't actually have anything important that needs to be done right this instant..." "It's ok," the pegasus said, landing on the cloud to sit beside the blue mare. "I'm sure you had a good reason for making it up." Instead of answering, Luna swallowed heavily and sat down as well. "Why are you crying?" "I am not crying!" the alicorn insisted. "But, your face—" "It is but sweat!" The yellow mare decided not to press the point. "So..." Fluttershy started when she saw that her companion wasn't going to speak further, "do you want to talk about what's bothering you? I m-mean, only if you d-don't mind." "Wha?! Why—why dost thou ask that?" Talk like a modern pony, Luna. "Sorry, I meant, what makes you think something is wrong?" "Well, um, Rainbow kind of saw you flying, and, um, figured out what you were trying to do, so she brought me here." "She—she was worried about me?" "Any of your friends would be worried!" "...Very well, I shall admit that there is an issue that is... troubling me." Why am I telling her this? "But it is something that I must overcome on my own." Although I know not how I shall accomplish that... "Some problems are easier to solve with help," Fluttershy said, thinking of a time when Applejack had tried to solo-harvest her entire orchard. "I understand, but this is not one of those problems. It is very... personal, I suppose is the best way to describe it." "I-I'm sorry if I'm prying," the pegasus apologized. Her head tilted downwards. "I d-didn't mean to make you unc-comfortable—" Well done, Luna, now you're making her feel bad, too! "Do not make that face, please; I truly do appreciate the offer. If I change my mind, you shall be the one I speak with about it. How is that?" "I'd be more than happy to help you with any problem!" For a few long minutes, the two mares simply sat and observed the night sky. Luna inspected it for any flaws, while Fluttershy merely enjoyed the sight. "B-back at the library, when the girls asked me about my date..." The pegasus's hesitant words startled Luna so badly that she once again nearly fell from the cloud. As soon as the crisis passed, Fluttershy continued. "I'm not, um, actually with Big Macintosh. We agreed to be friends early on. It was a nice dinner with a friend, but that was it." "What about him did you not like?" That is a relief... Luna shook her head to clear it of the unwanted thought. No, it's not a relief! Not a relief at all! Why would it be a relief? "It wasn't him. He's actually a very nice pony... I'm the one who..." Her voice trailed off before the sentence's end. Luna almost asked about what Fluttershy didn't want to say, but at the last second decided against it. If she wanted to tell me, then she would. I must respect her privacy, since she is respecting mine. The alicorn turned her gaze back to the stars, but looked back down immediately when something bumped into her side. "I'm sorry," the pegasus said, trying to stifle a yawn. She was wobbling a little bit, which had caused her to lean into the other mare for a moment. "I should be in bed and asleep by now, but—" She yawned again. "—it's just so nice out here, I would hate to go inside." Luna felt her heart melt as a third yawn came. Surprised at her own audacity, the princess stretched out a wing and wrapped it over Fluttershy's back. A friendly wing! This is nothing more than that! "If you wish to sleep, you may do so here," she said in answer to the yellow mare's uncertain glance. Fluttershy accepted the offer, and she was soon asleep, head burrowing into Luna's chest. Friends do things like this, right? I'm sure friends cuddle all the—oh, who am I kidding? Watching tenderly over her slumbering companion, the alicorn sighed in resignation. I...I guess... Discord was right the whole time. I'm in— "'I guess Discord was right the whole time', you're probably thinking," said Discord from above. "You're in love!" "Y-you!" she exclaimed, craning her neck to look at the dragonequis. "Stop doing that! How long have you been up there?!" "Long enough!" he said gleefully. "Haa, just try to argue with me now—I dare you! No, wait, I double diamond dog dare you!" "...Very well. I shall admit that perhaps there is the smallest kernel of truth to what you say, just this once." A giant, glowing sign burst into existance directly in front of the stunned princess. In bold words, it read, I TOLD YA SO!'; a loudspeaker, shouting "Nya nya nya nya!" completed the effect. "What a relief! I almost thought that this billboard was going to go to waste in my warehouse of unused props, but thanks to you, I get to use it at least once!" "Be silent!" Luna hissed. "You'll wake her!" "Pssh, an earthquake couldn't wake this one when she's sleeping," Discord scoffed. "I should know—she slept through every single one of my 'good morning, sunshine!' pranks. What a waste of time that was." He tugged Fluttershy's mane lightly, then rapped her on the head with his knuckles. "See?" Instead of waking up, she just gave a loud snore and dug herself further into her "pillow". "It is amazing how she can make even a snore seem adorable," the alicorn noted. "Yes, I never did figure out how she does that..." Luna realized that she was having an almost-civil conversation with this vile creature. "Fine, my secret is out! I have feelings for this pegasus! What do you intend to do with that knowledge?" "Well, I was planning on leaving you be and doing nothing, but if you want, I can put up posters... maybe take out an ad in The Equestrian Times... ooo, what about a documentary about this forbidden love?" "Doing 'nothing' will suffice," Luna said with as much dignity as she could muster. "Yeah, that's what I thought." Discord let out an exagerated yawn. "But as much as I love hanging out with a cow as boring as you, there are actual important things for me to do, so I'll bid you adieu!" "Who dost thou name, 'cow'?" she asked angrily to the space where he had disappeared. "Fiend..." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ On the underside of the cloud, green eyes glittered wickedly. The specter had heard everything said above, and it finally knew what to do in order to make the blue one its own. Ch 9: In Which Luna Meets Phineas, and Pinkie Uses a BrickLike every morning, Fluttershy awoke to the crowing of the rooster; unlike every morning, her eyes opened to a world devoid of light. I'm under the quilt... she thought with a yawn. I guess it's time to greet the day. Her legs pushed against the covers in an effort to reach open air. However, she wasn't expecting her bed to move. The thing covering her head lifted itself, and instead of being greeted by the sight of her room, she found herself sitting on a cloud, right next to a bemused Princess Luna. Was I under Luna's wing?! "A shouting dragonequis does not wake you, but a simple rooster does?" the princess asked with a hint of a grin. "What do you mean, 'dragonequis'?" Fluttershy asked. Memories of the night before slowly came back as she became more and more awake. "I—" I spent the entire night leaning against her! "Luna, I'm so sorry! I only wanted a little nap, I didn't mean to—" Oh, she probably thinks I'm really strange, now... "It is of no importance. I shall accompany you to your house before I take my leave." Soon, the two mares landed in front of the modest cottage. "Um, I... thank you, for letting me slee—" "Do not mention it," Luna interrupted. She fought back a yawn of her own. "I am happy that you trusted me to stand guard over your slumber." "'Stand guard'... Luna, do you mean that you didn't sleep at all?!" "Somepony had to make sure that we didn't fall," the princess said, her expression wooden. "I will be fine—" "No, no, no! I can't just—you come inside, right now! You need to get some sleep!" "But I—" "No 'buts'! You can use my shower, then you are going straight to bed!" "...Yes ma'am..." muttered the cowed alicorn. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Ten minutes later, a squeaky-clean Luna walked outside to find her pegasus friend feeding the animals. "Luna, you should be in bed!" she said, but the princess paid her no attention. Instead, her attention zeroed in on the little critters. Squirrels, rabbits, chipmunks, mice... "So..." she said in a dreamy voice, "...so... cute!" With that, she was off, chasing them down. Predictably, the animals fled the crazy, charging pony. "No, please do not run! Your princess merely desires cuddles! Cuddles, I say!" She halted in her tracks when one of the squirrels stopped and turned. Its face had a sour look on it, but that was nothing compared to its glowing-red eyes. "Chase us at your own peril, fleshling," it growled in a demonic voice. "Wha—wha—" Luna stuttered. The squirrel drew itself up tall, nearly reaching a full foot's height. "Foolish creature of bone and blood, you understand not the forces with which you meddle." "De—Demon squirrel!" the princess roared; her warrior's instincts took over. "We shall squash thee and cleanse this world of thy taint!" She lunged forward and brought a hoof down heavily. However, the creature easily darted to the side, avoiding the attack. "Stand—" *smash* "—still—" *crash* "—and—" *crunch* "—embrace—" *bam* "—thine—" *whack* "—end!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Fluttershy!" called Rarity as she came down the road to the little cottage. "Good morning!" Her cheery expression faltered when noticed Princess Luna leaping repeatedly at a squirrel. "Um... is the princess alright?" "Oh, she's just playing with Phineas," Fluttershy replied. "They look like they're having a lot of fun, don't they?" "Stop moving so that We may destroy thee!" "Heh heh, fun, playing..." the unicorn chuckled. "Right..." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After ten minutes of "playing", Phineas darted to Fluttershy and climbed onto her back. "Fluttershy! Beware, that is no normal fuzzy critter!" Luna cried. "Oh no, Phineas is very smart," the yellow mare replied, nuzzling him lightly. "I am the thing that goes bump in the night!" Phineas said. "Dost thou not hear him?!" the princess asked. "Hear what?" Rarity said curiously. "Never be alone." "Seriously, nopony else is hearing this?!" Fluttershy patted the dark mare on the back. "Luna, maybe you should get some sleep now..." "Your nightmares will be of me!" "Squirrel... what art thou?" "I am everything that you fear." "Yes, you're going to sleep right now." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Twilight, Pinky, and Applejack trotted towards Fluttershy's cottage, where they had been invited for a light lunch. "Sorry Pinky, but I don't think there'll be anything sweet there," Twilight said apologetically. "Nuh uh, that's impossible!" "With Fluttershy, it's usually salads and tea." The earth pony brandished a sack of her own food. "Ah gotta eat somethin' more fillin' than that if Ah don't want to die of hunger, so Ah bring mah own vittles. Y'all can have some if ya want, Pinky." "C'mon you two, stop complaining!" the princess said. "It was nice of her to invite us, the least we can do is be grateful." "Ah didn't say Ah wasn't grateful..." "Yeah Twilight, it's not like we're monsters or anything—" "Wait, what's that?" Applejack hushed the other two ponies and pointed at something that was moving through the shadows towards them. It could almost be confused as a shadow itself, except that it acted on its own. Twilight immediately recognized the specter from the reports she had read. "Girls, get behind me," she said. "Hold on, if there's somethin' dangerous—" "I don't have time to explain!" Twilight snapped. "Get behind me, now!" The other two mares reluctantly obeyed. Fortunately, they got out of sight in the nick of time; the moment their faces were hidden from view, the specter opened its eyes. Bright-green orbs locked with the alicorn's, and immediately it attempted to fight its way in. This thing's definitely pretty strong, Twilight thought, but it's not nearly as bad as when Luna broke my barrier. She easily repelled it, then charged up a spell that would hopefully capture the monster. However, right as she cast her dweomer, the specter shot towards Fluttershy's cottage at a surprising speed. "Stick with me, Pinky, Applejack, and whatever you do, do not look into its eyes!" Pinky giggled while they ran. "Haha, you said 'doodoo'!" The three mares burst through the front door and gasped; Rarity stood bravely before the creature. "Rarity!" Twilight cried. "Don't look into its—" She was surprised when her unicorn friend stared straight into its gaze. Suddenly, as if burned, the specter fled from her, back outside towards the chicken coop. Just before it reached the safety of the surrounding trees, Applejack slammed a bucket down over top of it, and Pinkie contributed by dropping a brick on the bucket in order to weigh it down. Muffled thumps came from within as the specter attempted to push its way free, but the makeshift prison wouldn't be budged. "Phew," Applejack exhaled. "The varmint almost got out of Dodge." "AJ, Pinkie... I'm sorry for shouting at you back there," Twilight said. "Nah, don't worry 'bout it." "We both realized it probably had something to do with mind control powers!" Pinkie said, waving her hooves in the air dramatically. "What was all that commotion?" Fluttershy cried. Both she and Rarity cantered out to join their other friends. "That monster that Luna's been looking for just tried to attack Twilight," the pink pony explained. "Yeah, but..." Twilight wore a troubled expression. It sure was strange, the way it ran... "'Yeah, but' what?" Rarity asked. "...Nothing. I'm sure it's nothing." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Luna's dreams were filled with images of dancing Discords, each one sporting a sign that said "I TOLD YA SO!" "Um, Luna..." The princess stirred slightly, but didn't wake up. Something nudged her in the side. "Sleepyhead, it's time to get up..." "Nnnnhn..." she moaned in protest. "Go 'way, Tia... 'nother ten minutes, We beg of thee..." "Luna, it's important. We caught the specter." That got the alicorn's attention. Within a moment, she was out of bed and on her hooves. "You what?" she exclaimed to Fluttershy, the pony who had been trying to wake her. "It's outside. Applejack and Pinkie trapped it under a bucket." Luna's expression could only be described as wooden. "...What." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "What." Now that Luna stood outside and could inspect the specter's improvised prison, it seemed even more ridiculous than ever. "You trapped an extremely dangerous monster. With a bucket." "And a brick!" Pinkie added. "This is a creature that not even the entirety of the palace guard could apprehend, and all you needed was a bucket." "Don't forget the brick!" "Well, it was sittin' right there, so Ah just plopped it right on top of the little critter, and that was that." "You keep forgetting to mention the brick!" Luna smacked a hoof against her forehead. "A bucket... why didn't I think of that?" she said sarcastically. "That brick was important!" "Alright, Twilight, let us take care of it before it finds a way out," the princess said. "Everypony else stay back. Twilight, when I say so, you lift the bucket. I shall make certain that this specter troubles nopony ever again." As soon as both ponies found their places, she said, "Now!" Twilight threw the bucket aside and Luna immediately torched the area with a gout of flame. However, as soon as the smoke cleared, everypony could tell that the monster was long gone. "It burrowed out," Rarity said, pointing at a hole in the scorched ground, through which the specter had presumably escaped. "At least we know it can be captured," Luna said. "But now we must make a plan. You said that it was after Twilight?" "Yeah, it went straight for her," Applejack said. "Then it's a good thing I taught you how to protect your mind." "Oh yeah! Speaking of which," Twilight said, "Rarity, how did you manage to fight it off?" "I'm allowed to know how to shield my mind too, aren't I?" the unicorn said indignantly. "Well, yes, but why would you know how to do that in the first place?" "If you must know, when I was a filly, some colt used a spell to read my thoughts, then used what he learned to spread rumors about me. Ever since, I've made certain that nopony can get inside my head unless I let them." "I have determined what our best course of action is," said Luna, rejoining the conversation. "Since Twilight and I are the specter's targets, we should separate ourselves from the rest of you. That way, none of you will be in any danger of possession when it attacks again." "Wait, what makes y'all so certain that thing'll go after you two again?" "It's clear that it wants an alicorn body, so it makes sense that we're the ones it will approach." All of the others broke out in argument at once, but Twilight silenced them. "I—I think Luna's right," she said hesitantly. "But you'll be in danger!" Fluttershy protested. "We can help you!" "Actually, you will help more by avoiding the specter completely," Luna said. "If it were to possess one of you, it could use that leverage to its advantage." "Still—" "C'mon, Fluttershy, we'll be fine. Look, Luna'll be there! If anyplace is safe, it's next to her!" Another shock of jealousy ran through the pegasus's body at the thought of the alicorns spending time together, just the two of them. "But... I don't want you to get hurt..." "Everything will be alright," the dark princess assured her. "As soon as we have dealt with the specter, we shall return here. Is that agreed?" "Fine, do whatever you want!" Fluttershy said in a very rare show of anger. "I don't care!" She felt a twinge of regret as an expression of pain crossed Luna's face, but right at that moment, the pegasus couldn't find the willpower to deal with it. "Very well," the princess said. "We'll... we'll just be going, then." "Fluttershy, wasn't that a bit rude?" Rarity asked, as soon as the two alicorns departed. "I just... I don't like this at all." But what is it that I don't like? Luna and Twilight being in danger, or the fact that they get to spend so much time together... alone... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ An hour later, Twilight and Luna stood in the middle of a large field. They could see for at least twenty yards in each direction, so there was no way that the specter could sneak up on them. "If it truly desires to possess one of us, then the only way it can do so is by confronting us here," Luna said confidently. Twilight began to fidget. "Um, Luna... there's something that's been bothering me." "What is it?" "When I ran into the thing earlier, I'm not actually totally sure that it was really after me." Luna felt a spike of dread plunge into her back. "What do you mean?" she asked. "Well, um... it's kind of a stretch, but..." "Twilight, it's very important that you tell me what you're getting at." "It's just that, after it failed to take control of my mind, wouldn't the best plan be to escape back into the shadows? But instead of that, it tried to get into Fluttershy's house, like it was going after something else..." "You mean, the pony it really wanted was inside." "It's possible." "It could have been after me," Luna mused. "I was inside and asleep, after all." Then something even more frightening occurred to her. This probably didn't happen... But what if the specter was there last night, listening in? What if it heard me admit *that* to Discord? If so, then it knows... "Oh, *yay!*!" she cursed loudly, causing Twilight to jump. "Follow me to Fluttershy's house! I have erred greatly!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Why can't I stop feeling jealous? Fluttershy wondered as she went around the house. She made the motions of performing her daily chores, but her heart wasn't truly in it. She wouldn't be interested in a simple pony like me anyway. Twilight's far better for her... she's prettier, smarter... She absent-mindedly poured the dog food into a bowl and placed it on the ground. And they're so much closer, anyways. Always going off with each other. Behind her, something shifted, making a light scraping noise. "Your ssadness... Sssmells deliciouss." When Fluttershy spun around, she found herself gazing straight into a pair of horrifying, green eyes. Author's Note Whenever life gets you down, just remember: All you need is ~~love~~ a bucket, and a brick. Ch 10: In Which Luna Despairs, the Elements Fail, and a New Challenger Appears"Hurry, Twilight!" Luna shouted. "We must make haste!". "Sorry!" the other alicorn apologized, panting hard. "I'm trying...*gasp*... my best!" Finally, after what seemed like hours to the desperate Luna, they landed at the cottage. The dark princess smiled when she saw that everything was as it should be, but her feelings of relief immediately vanished as Rarity appeared, a panicked look on her face. "I was just leaving a note for you!" she said frantically. "Fluttershy—that thing got Fluttershy! Her eyes were green, and her voice wasn't normal, and—and—she just flew off!" "Which way?" Luna's body grew darker by the second; her tone of voice and expression assured everypony that now was not the time to hinder her. "That way," Rarity said, pointing west. The princess spread her wings and, with a single powerful stroke, shot off without even saying farewell. "I knew it! I knew it was after somepony else!" Twilight prepared to follow Luna, but first turned to her unicorn friend. "I'm going to follow her. You should stay here, just in case Fluttershy comes back." "But I—" Rarity paused mid-argument. "I understand. Please, bring them both back!" "Don't worry, she'll be alright." And then Twilight, too, was gone. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ An observing pony would have only seen a blur as Luna pursued the thing that had taking her Fluttershy. My Fluttershy? she thought with a mental chuckle; she brushed the moment of levity aside and pushed herself even harder. How could I have been so stupid? I should have stayed with my friends... to protect them if that thing went after them! And look what happened! Finally, she spied a tall cliff, upon which stood the canary-yellow pony that Luna sought. Clods of dirt flew as the alicorn's hooves skidded on the ground. "Hello again," the specter snarled through its host's mouth. "Release that pony this instant," Luna commanded. Her mane flowed directly upward, taking the appearance of a bright blue bonfire that licked angrily at the sky. "No, I don't think I ssshall." Fluttershy's legs began to walk backwards, taking her towards the edge. "Stop!" It means to take her off the cliff! "Take... We shall allow thee to enter Our mind. That is thy goal, is it not?" "You think me a fool?" It let out a hissing breath. "I'm aware that you can ssstill repel me, after I leave thisss body and before I enter yoursss." The heels of the yellow mare's back legs hung over the edge—one more step, and she would be gone. Luna moved to her last resort and lashed out with magic, hoping to catch the pegasus and drag her back onto firmer ground. However, the specter clearly expected this, because it instantly jumped backwards. Gravity took effect and Fluttershy fell. "No!" The princess was off the cliff in an instant, straining herself to catch up to the falling mare. Her panic increased when the specter grinned evilly and flapped the pegasus's wings, speeding up its own descent. No, no, no! I'm not going to make it! She's going to die right in front of me! As Luna's spirit broke, so too did the integrity of the spell that kept her thoughts safe from intrusion. The monster sensed her moment of despair right as it happened. Its green eyes shot open and bore into the defeated mare's, allowing it to finally take what it deserved. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Normally, Rainbow Dash didn't travel this far away from Ponyville, but for some reason, she felt particularly adventurous that day. With the wind blowing through her mane, she admired the surrounding scenery as it shot by underneath her. Just as she contemplated whether or not she should head home for a bit of shut-eye, she noticed something very small and very yellow falling quickly, with another thing akin to a blue bullet falling after it. She strained her eyes and saw that the "things" were Fluttershy and Luna. Now, Rainbow wasn't the most mathematically inclined pony ever born, but anything even slightly related to flying, such as falling, was second nature to her. Thus, she could easily tell that Luna wasn't going to be able to get to Fluttershy in time to save her. Time for the Dashinator to shine! the pegasus thought, putting all of her effort into reaching her friend before it was too late. It's going to be close... The blue mare pushed herself even harder, straining for just a few extra inches. Just as Fluttershy was about to hit the ground, Rainbow got her forelegs under the falling mare and pulled her in close. Unfortunately, even though the athletic pegasus strained to stay airborne, her friend's downward momentum pushed them both into the ground. In order to protect the less-hardy pony from further injury, Rainbow made sure that she was the one hitting the ground instead of her delicate cargo. They rolled for a number of yards before finally coming to a stop. For her part, Luna managed to spread her wings and drastically slowed her own descent, but she still landed heavily. She skidded a distance on her stomach before coming to a complete halt. "Yeowch, that's going to hurt tomorrow," Rainbow muttered, surprised that she had gotten away with only bruises. The princess, on the other hand, didn't look nearly as well. She had risen almost immediately and staggered around with a drunken gait. "Hey, Luna, you alright?" "Gah!" the princess gasped, head turning to look at the other mare. "Stay... away!" Her eyes flashed green, then back to white. Her gaze snapped over to where Fluttershy lay—at first the pegasus was immobile, but Luna's eyes widened and teared up when the yellow mare stirred and gave a quiet groan. "She's fine...I am gladduungh!" Another burst of green light shot forth from her skull, and she spread her wings to take flight. Luna wobbled in mid-air, seemingly unable to maintain a stable flight, but it wasn't enough to ground her. Soon, she was out of sight. "Fluttershy! Rainbow!" Twilight had finally caught up, panting heavily. "Are you two alright?" "I'll live, but Luna didn't look so good." "That thing... it got her, didn't it?" the purple alicorn asked with a frown. "What thing?" "That... specter thing, that she was hunting. Did her eyes turn green?" Rainbow recalled the emerald light that had emitted from Luna's head. "For a little bit, yeah, but they changed back to normal." "Just a little bit?" Twilight put a hoof to her chin as she pondered what that meant. "Could she be fighting it? I guess if anypony could, it would be her." "Uuungh..." Fluttershy groaned, eyes slowly opening. "What..." "Fluttershy!" The two other mares crowded around her and began to ply the groggy pony with questions. "Does anything hurt? Are you alright?" "I... I think I might have a bruise on my back...And my head hurts..." She glanced at Twilight and frowned. "Um, sorry if I'm wrong, but weren't you with Luna? Where is she? And... where are we?" Rainbow sighed and rubbed her forehead wearily. "You better sit down; you aren't gonna like this." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Rarity paced back and forth outside Fluttershy's cottage, nervously wondering what could be taking so long. It's been nearly an hour... I hope they're alright! Suddenly, three specks appeared in the sky, growing larger by the second, and the unicorn breathed a sigh of relief at the sight of her three friends. However, her relaxation fizzled when the specks approached and became recognizable—Rainbow had joined them, and Luna was missing. "Fluttershy!" As soon as they landed, Rarity threw herself forward and hugged the pegasus tightly. "I thought I'd never see you again!" "Don't cry over me," Fluttershy said in a subdued voice, patting the crying mare on the back awkwardly. "I'm not worth worrying about anyway..." "Why do you say that, dear? And also, where did Luna go? She's alright, isn't she?" A dark mood filled the atmosphere, and Rarity realized that she had said something wrong. Fluttershy looked at the ground and walked away slowly. "We think Luna gave herself up to save Fluttershy," Twilight said in a soft voice. "By the time Rainbow and I were there, the specter was already in Luna's head, and I can't think of any other reason for how it could get past her defenses." "And the poor dear blames herself, I suppose," Rarity said. "Very well, I know what I must do." The unicorn marched over to where Rainbow and Fluttershy stood. "Hey, cheer up, it's not your fault—" the blue pony began, but she didn't get a chance to finish. "Fluttershy, right now is no time to be feeling sorry for yourself." The two pegasi looked at Rarity in shock. "If you really must, then there will be time for that later—after we've saved Luna." "But... but I—" "Tell me, do you really think moping is going to help her?" "I—I don't know what to do!" Fluttershy cried. "What can little, weak Fluttershy do to help if even Luna wasn't strong enough?!" "Howdy!" shouted Applejack, trudging down the road with a wooden chest in tow, Pinkie close behind. "Rarity, I got them!" "Here's what you can do," Rarity said. "You can come with us. While you were gone, I sent Applejack and Pinkie to acquire the Elements of Harmony from the library. They saved Luna once before, so there's no reason they can't do it now." Twilight gave an impressed whistle. "That was very insightful of you." "Yes, I can be rather resourceful, can't I?" The unicorn flipped her mane over to the other side of her neck. "What do you say, Fluttershy? You can apologize to her when she's safe and sound, can't you?" Fluttershy blinked the tears out of her eyes and let a tremulous smile spread across her face. "Yes, I can... thank you." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ In a small copse of trees, Luna fell to the ground, panting heavily. "Get... out of... my head..." she gasped. "But I find that I quite like it here," the specter said through her mouth. A green haze encroached on her vision, and she could tell that the battle would soon be over. "I...said... get out!" A final burst of willpower nearly forced the monster from her head, but as Luna's temporary surge left her, she knew that she had lost her last chance. "You lossse..." Her eyesight slowly faded, until she knew nothing but darkness. "YESsss!" the specter screamed in triumph. The princess's body stood tall, at last fully under its new master's control. "Now nothing sshall stand againsst me!" A small bolt of lightning suddenly fell from the sky and struck Luna on the back, causing the creature to hiss in pain. Its head snapped around to look up, where it saw the rapidly retreating Twilight Sparkle. "Little fool... I sshall end you for thisss!" In the blink of an eye, it was in fast pursuit. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Twilight made a quick landing back at the cottage, where her friends finished the preparations. "Is everypony ready?" she asked. A number of affirmatives rang out from their various hiding places. "Alright, good, because here she comes!" Along the way, the specter had pulled a boulder out of the ground, and now lobbed it in Twilight's direction. The projectile soared towards her at a high velocity, but missed when the young alicorn jumped to the side. The dark princess landed awkwardly and pawed at the ground. "To challenge my might all by yoursself..." the beast taunted. "Brave, but sstupid." "Luna..." Fluttershy emerged from behind a tree and trotted forward to stand beside Twilight. "Luna, can you hear me?" "Your dear princessss is sssleeping, I fear..." The pegasus ignored it. "Please, try to fight it. Come back to us." The specter took a step forward, but noticeably trembled. "Sstop that! I'll destroy you where you sstand!" "Good job," Twilight whispered to her friend. A purple aura enveloped her horn as she stealthily began to cast a spell. "Keep her occupied, for just a little longer." "I—I know it's my fault, that you're like this," Fluttershy continued in a quiet voice. "But please come back. I'm sorry, for everything. I won't be jealous anymore, I promise!" The specter stumbled and nearly fell to the ground; the green in its eyes faded. "Fl—Fluttershy?" came Luna's normal voice. "Luna!" "Ok, it's ready!" Twilight said. "Now!" She completed her spell, and a vast number of magical tendrils flew out of the ground at Luna's feet. They wrapped themselves around her and tightened, holding her down. The beast roared in fury as the princess's eyes once more became fully green. Pinkie leaped from a tree and landed on top of a giant cannon, that had been somehow concealed until that very moment. Her expression was completely blank—it was the one she had worn immediately after returning from the mountains. "Parate..." she started calmly, "...PARTYCANNONBLASTTOTHEFACE!" Her face grew wild as she pressed a large button and a massive wad of pink gum slapped onto the restrained princess. "The Elements!" Twilight cried. "Hurry, before she gets free!" The rest of the element-bearers galloped into the open and gathered around Luna. The elements began to glow, a clear signal that the ritual had begun. "IGNORANT FLESH-BAGSsss!" the specter shrieked. Luna's horn unleashed a wave of crackling power that vaporized both Twilight's spell and Pinkie's gum. "I have all of Luna'ss memoriesss! You think I don't know how to defeat the Elementss?" One moment, the alicorn stood still, shaking the remnants of the cannon's payload from her mane. The next, she loomed tall over Applejack. "You cannot usse them if one of you is misssing, can you?" The dark princess placed her horn against Applejack's forehead; a burst of magic blinded all of the ponies, and when they could see again, Applejack had disappeared. "What did you do with her?!" Pinkie demanded angrily. She quickly reloaded her party cannon. "Fear not, I merely sssent her sssomeplacce where ssshe cannot interfere." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The first thing Applejack felt was a cold wind that made her cheeks feel numb. She opened her eyes and looked around, instantly recognizing the surrounding buildings. She had been sent to the Crystal Empire. Almost as instantly, she noticed that she also stood on top of the highest spire of the Crystal Empire's castle, nearly three-hundred yards in the air. "Oh, horseapples." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "You ssshould not worry about your friend. Insstead, conccern yoursselvesss with your own livess." The specter stalked forward slowly, a charge building up on Luna's horn. However, right as it appeared ready to release a devastating spell, the princess's legs hesitated, then rooted themselves to the ground. "Curssse you, you annoying cow!" the monster yelled. "It's Luna again!" Twilight shouted. Like before, the alicorn's eyes cleared. "I...can hold it back..." Luna gasped through clenched teeth. "...But only for a few more minutes...run... get away!" "Can't you use your mind-shield spell to get rid of the specter?" Rarity asked. "Nnn...no, not while...nngh... it has itself wrapped... around my very being..." "We won't abandon you!" Fluttershy said passionately. "She's right!" Rainbow added. "We'll do whatever it takes to get that thing out!" "Then... run..." the princess repeated. "Get... my sister..." "Actually... that's not a terrible idea," Twilight admitted. "Twilight?!" "Think about it," the younger alicorn said. "Without Applejack, we can't use the elements, and I'm sure as hay not strong enough to beat Luna. Princess Celestia might be our only hope." The rest of the mares grudgingly agreed, and almost as one, they turned and dashed away—only Fluttershy paused before leaving. "Luna..." she said sadly, "...I'll save you. Don't worry." "Thank... you... Oh, and I... heard what you said... before..." "What do you mean?" "When you said you were... ah, I cannot keep this up for much longer... You said you were sorry for everything." "Oh, u-um, that, well, um—" "I have never once—gah!— felt that there was anything for which you should be sorry." "Luna..." The princess's eyes flashed green, and her body began to tremble violently. "Flee! The beast is overtaking me once more!" With that said, Fluttershy followed her friends, vowing to never give up until Luna was free again. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Two hours later, the element bearers, minus Applejack, congregated at the train station. "Here's what I think is the best plan," Twilight told her friends. "While you four go to Canterlot and speak with Princess Celestia, I'll hunt down Applejack." "Why are you going alone?" Rainbow asked. "Two of use would cover a lot more ground, right?" "I have a spell that'll point me right to her," the alicorn replied. "It won't take me very long at all." Rarity raised a hoof to indicate that she had a query. "What should we tell the princess when we get there?" "Good question!" The other mares rolled their eyes as Twilight fell into "teacher mode". "Tell her everything you know, then help her think up some type of strategy. She'll definitely know what to do." A loudspeaker overhead announced an arrival. "Now arriving, the Crystal Express! All passengers leaving for Canterlot, please wait until the train comes to a complete stop before boarding!" The train pulled in and halted with a loud hiss. "This is your train, girls," Twilight said. "Don't worry, I'll catch up as soon as I get AJ!" "Be careful," Fluttershy said, worry etched into her face. "Last time we split up, it—it didn't go very well." "Well then, y'all better not be splittin' up again, Ah reckon." The train door had opened to reveal Applejack, standing confidently with a smug expression. "Applejack!" "You're alright!" "How did you get here?" "Whatever spell that thing used on me sent me straight for the Crystal Empire," the earth pony explained. "And Ah figured, as long as Ah was in the neighborhood, Ah might as well recruit some help." A second pony, appearing as would a goddess from the days of yore, stepped forth from inside the train car and cracked her neck in preparation. Light-pink hooves crashed down onto the platform, sending a chill down everypony's spine. "I'm here to kick flank and rule some crystal ponies," Princess Mi Amore Cadenza said with a wicked grin, "and I'm all out of crystal." Elsewhere in Equestria, somepony was playing a sick guitar riff. Author's Note Weedly weedly deedly weedle weedle deedle weedlydeedlydeedly waaaaaaaaaooo *Smashes guitar on stage* *Leaves* This is Randy the Guitarist, and this... is his subplot. Ch 11: In Which Celestia Takes Charge, Discord Presents a Plan, and Fluttershy Confesses"Cadance, what are you doing here?" Twilight asked, jaw hanging open. "What about Shining Armor? What about the Crystal Empire?" "Nice to see you, too," the pink pony said while chuckling. She threw a foreleg over Twilight's back companionably. "Don't worry, I left the Empire in capable hooves; it won't fall apart overnight. And as for Shining..." "I'm right here..." the unicorn in question said as he stumbled out of the train. "Oh geez, I don't feel too good..." "You still get motion sickness?" Twilight asked. "I thought you got over that during your military training." "If only I was that lucky... urp!" He dashed off, green-faced, to find a trash can. "Applejack told me about Luna on the way here. Oh, and I sent notice to Aunt Celly, too, right before I left," Cadance added. "She should be meeting us at your house, Twilight." "See, everything's going to be okay," Rarity muttered to Fluttershy, poking her in the side. "We've got the three other princesses here, ready to help! What can go wrong?" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The specter paced back and forth in the cavern that it had habitated for its entire existence, deep in the Everfree Forest. It was here that it would finally enslave this new body to its will, thus ensuring that Luna would no longer have the capability to wrest control away. "I would have tasssted their blood," it hissed. "If only you hadn't interfered." It knew that Luna couldn't hear its words—she was unconscious once more, and thus unable to see, hear, or feel anything. "Well well well, you're doing alright for yourself, I see." The possessed alicorn immediately jumped to the ready, a spell charged on her crackling horn. "Who daress to—M-Masster!" At the sight of Discord, the specter dropped to the alicorn's knees. "I'm impressed that you managed to survive for all these years," the dragonequis said, "and I really must ask, how did you manage to take possession of our dear Princess Luna?" "It wass not eassy," the creature replied. "But you created me to be clever, and I ussed that clevernesss well." "Well, now that this cow has been rendered inert, I'm going to make sure she's never a threat to us again. If you don't want to disappear from Equestria forever, I suggest you vacate her oh-so-thick skull." "Of coursse..." it said. Suddenly, a line of dark magic whipped out and wrapped itself around Discord's neck. "Or perhapss not." The eldritch god of chaos turned his body to liquid, allowing him to easily slip free. "Aw, you figured it out..." he whined. "How'd you know?" "I knew from the beginning! How many timesss musst I tell you foolss—I have all of thiss meat-ssack'sss memoriess! Of courssse I would know that you're a traitor of your own causse!" "You know, your kind really was one of my favorites..." Discord reached out and grabbed hold of the magical whip, and the glowing aura began to be pulled up his arm. The specter gasped in shock as it felt a drain on its energy. "But you're starting to get on my nerves, and that I just cannot abide." "I SSSHALL DESSTROY YOU!" it roared, dispersing the whip into nothingness. "Farewell, my former massster!" "I think I'm beginning to feel unwelcome," Discord said with a sad expression. He held out his arm, which had retained the magical energy he had sucked from Luna. "Oh well... at least I got what I came for. See you soon!" He exploded in a shower of chocolate milk that drenched the alicorn's body, making the specter shake with rage. "Yess, sssee you ssoon..." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "The best option is to find a way to use the Elements of Harmony," Princess Celestia said to the assembled ponies. "Fighting with Luna is dangerous for all of us, her included." "But we already tried the Elements!" Rainbow said. "That monster said that it knew how to deal with them!" "Yes, but you didn't have Cadance and me there to protect you, did you?" "Hey, don't forget about me!" Shining Armor added. Celestia acknowledged him with a nod. "Indeed. With the three of us keeping you safe, there should be no way for the specter to interfere this time." "I wouldn't be so certain." A *pop* heralded the arrival of Discord, whose arm shimmered with a familiar dark-blue light. "That thing's almost half as smart as I am, which is no small amount, if I do say so myself." "Oh, good. Discord's here," Twilight said, slowly twirling a hoof in the air. "Hip hip hooray." "Instead of being critical, why not make your own contributions?" Cadance asked him. "If you know the enemy so well, then surely you have some idea of what we should do." "I do, and don't call me Shirley." The rest of the room stared at him in blank confusion, except for Pinkie, who dropped to the ground and laughed her flank off. "I'm surrounded by yokels..." the dragonequis muttered. "I have taken the liberty of visiting our poor captured Wuna and stealing a portion of her power. Not much, mind you, but enough for what I'm planning." He glanced around as if looking for something before walking into the kitchen. "Hey, what are you doing?!" Twilight demanded when she heard him begin to rummage through the pots and other assorted kitchen tools. "Aha! This will do nicely." He held up a frying pan. The energy that he had stored in his arm transferred itself into the heavy, iron implement. "If the rest of you lovely, immortal mares would be so kind as to apply your own magic..." "What exactly is your idea?" Celestia asked. "And why do you need our input?" "You ponies and your explanations! 'Here's how we do this', and 'What will we need to do that?' Fine. I'm constructing a weapon that we can use to force the specter out of its host." "That's good enough for me," Cadance said, trotting over. Before the others could protest, she placed her horn up against the pan, and sent a jet of magic shooting into it. "You're up to something," Twilight said suspiciously. "I'm always up to something! However, this time, it's something that's not going to make all of you miserable! Probably." "Twilight," Celestia said, coming up to stand beside her former pupil, "I have come to trust Discord. He has proven, to me at least, that he is a being that we can depend on." "Seriously, did you have to say it like that? You're going to make me puke..." "Wait, Princess..." the youngest alicorn started, but she knew that she had lost the debate. "Fine." She trotted over and, almost violently, shot a jolt of her own power into the cooking implement. "You happy?" "Painfully so." The only one left to contribute was Celestia, who repeated the other princesses' actions. "And... it... is...finished!" Discord said as he brandished it above his head. "Duh duh duh duuuuuuuuuuh!" sang Pinkie, earning more than one curious look. Fluttershy walked forward and tugged lightly on Discord's arm. "Um... so, how does it work?" "What, this?" the dragonequis asked, gesturing to the magical pan. "Oh, it's a very complicated piece of equipment. Not just anypony can be trusted to wield it." "Discord..." Twilight growled. "Oh fine, Miss 'I-Don't-Know-How-To-Relax-and-So-I-Like-To-Yell-At-Disc-" "Discord!" "See what I mean? Alright, using this thing's so easy that even the rainbow-haired one can handle it." "Hey!" "You just bonk 'er on the head with the flat side, and out the little feller comes, leaving widdle Wuna safe and sound. And I think it goes without saying that I shall be doing the bonking." Twilight's mouth was already open with an argument prepared, but Celestia cut her off. "That is fine. You can be the one to use your magical...frying pan... but only if the Elements fail to exorcise the creature." "Aw c'mon, are you serious?" he asked with a pout. "Completely." "Whatever..." The dragonequis went into the corner to mope. "Well," Cadance said, clapping her hooves together, "it's getting dark outside, and I think we all need plenty of rest!" "What're y'all talkin' about? We should go after her now, while we still can!" "That would be a dreadful mistake," the white alicorn said serenely. "Even fighting Luna during the day will be difficult, but to do the same at night? When she's at her strongest? We wouldn't stand a chance." Rarity decided to chime in. "Applejack, dear, I understand your concern, but the princess's reasoning is sound. We should do this when we have the best chance of success, don't you think?" "Ah reckon... shoot, it just grinds on mah nerves, is all." The unicorn approached and spoke in a quieter voice. "Mine too, believe me. You're not the only one suffering, after all." She pointed at Fluttershy, who stood off to the side, staring blankly into space. "What's wrong with her?" Applejack asked. "I'm not completely sure, but the poor dear is taking this harder than the rest of us. We need to be strong for her sake, as well as Luna's." "Then let's go cheer her up!" The two ponies trotted over to their friend and set about raising her mood. "Hey, Twilight," Cadance called, "I'm sorry to impose, but could we all stay here tonight? It would be a lot safer if we stick together. Who knows what that thing will decide to do?" "Sure, that's fine by me! I'll just get my extra pillows and blankets..." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Fluttershy was deep in thought when she felt something poke her in the forehead. She came back to reality to find both Applejack and Rarity standing in front of her. "Finally!" the unicorn exclaimed. "We've been trying to get your attention for ages!" "If by 'ages' she means about ten seconds, then Ah reckon she's right. Anyhoo, how're ya holdin' up, sugarcube?" "I'm... I'm fine," Fluttershy said softly. "Just thinking." "What about?" "Um, nothing important." "Well, ya wanna play a game? Ah bet Twi's got somethin' stashed away around here..." "No thank you. Oh, b-but don't let that stop you from playing!" "Naw, that's alright." "To be honest," Rarity said, "we noticed that you've seemed particularly down during this whole ordeal. We only want you to be happier." "I don't think..." The pegasus audibly swallowed. "That's not something I can do right now." "Why in tarnation would ya think somethin' like that?" "Are you still blaming yourself for all of this?" The bluntness of the question had Fluttershy rocking back on her hooves. "N-no... Well, I mean, yes, but that's only part of it." "Then what's the rest? We're your friends, we can help with whatever the problem is!" Fluttershy clamped her eyes shut and shook her head. "C'mon, don't just bottle it up," Applejack said encouragingly. "It's good to get things like this off your chest." Again, the pegasus shook her head, shrinking back a bit. "You know that we won't judge you for anything." Rarity tilted the the shy mare's face up to force her into making eye contact. "Pleeeeeease?" "...Do you promise?" Fluttershy asked. "Of course we promise!" "Yup, it's a deal." "Do you really promise?" Applejack resisted the urge to roll her eyes. "You know me, Ah wouldn't lie 'bout somethin' like that. Or anythin' at all, now that Ah think about it..." "Trust me, nothing you say will make me think any less of you." "I... guess...*mumble*." "Sorry? I didn't catch that." Fluttershy's cheeks grew bright red as she repeated herself. "I think...I'm in love with Luna.." "One more time, sugarcube." "I SAID I THINK I LOVE LUNA!" Despite the low volume of her voice, it was so intense and so highly pitched that it cut through all of the idle chatter. Everypony immediately stopped talking and turned surprised gazes towards the pink-maned mare. "I'm—I'm sorry..." "Did... did you just say that you love Luna?" Rarity asked, wide-eyed. "U-um, um, I think... maybe...possibly... yes?" The unicorn held her silence for a second more before a humongous grin spread across her face. "Whahahaha!" she shrieked, pulling her friend into a tight hug. "That's simply fantastic! To have found... oh, I'm so jealous!" Cadance came prancing over and threw a glowing smile Fluttershy's way. "This means that it's extra important that we bring Aunty Lu home!" she said. "That's right!" Rarity stood up tall, as if to proclaim something. "We will not fail, for the sake of Fluttershy's feelings for Luna!" she cried. "You don't, um, have to—" "For the sanctity of love and caring!" the pink princess added as she similarly positioned herself besides Rarity. However, it was the moment when Rainbow came over to join them that Fluttershy knew that the situation couldn't be salvaged. "For a chance for Fluttershy to get to second base!" the blue mare shouted. A soft 'eep!' accompanied the poor pegasus as she fainted dead-away. Ch 12: In Which Battle is Joined, Fluttershy is Saved, and Noggins are WhackedA hush fell over the forest as a mighty winged form took flight, its shadow cast on the canopy below by the early-morning sun. All of the creatures that lived amongst the trees, be they monstrous or miniscule, knew that this thing, flying overhead, was not an enemy to be trifled with. The specter felt their fear, and revelled in it. It had solidified its grip on Luna's mind, to the point where she likely wouldn't wake up even if freed from its insidious grasp. The alicorn's mouth spread wide in a wicked grin. "Now to do sssomething about thosse Element bearersss..." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "This should be far enough," Celestia said, eyeballing the distance between their chosen battleground and Ponyville. "Everypony knows what they're supposed to be doing, correct?" "Of course they do," Discord answered in a bored voice. "We've only been over it a billion times." "Make sure you keep your priorities straight." The princess pointedly ignored his sarcasm. "I don't want the Element bearers to be interrupted just because you would find it amusing to whack my sister on the head with a frying pan." "This is not just a simple 'frying pan'!" the dragonequis said. "I'll have you know, that I have given him a name!" "Oo, oo, what is it?" Pinkie asked. "Is it something like 'The Equalizer'? 'Cataclysm'?" Rainbow raised her hoof excitedly. "What about 'Ghost Slayer'?" "All of those are wrong." Discord brandished his fighting implement with pride. "I have named him, 'Steve'." "What?!" "I just don't get you sometimes," Twilight said, shaking her head. "Uh, that's because I'm Discord, Lord of Chaos and Entropy! Unpredictability is part of my shtick! Where have you been for the past two years?!" "Quiet! Here she comes!" Celestia flapped her wings and rose to meet her sister. "Guess we won't have to send anypony to get her, after all," Shining muttered. Twilight gathered her five friends near her. "We have to do this as quickly as we can," she said quietly. "The longer it takes, the greater the chance that one of us will get hurt." "Alright," they told her. "Creature, I will offer this once." Celestia's voice rang clearly in the morning air. "If you release my sister, then we can negotiate a peaceful solution for your continued existence." A sudden tendril of shadow magic flew out and wrapped itself around the sun princess's foreleg. It threw her downward with such speed and force that a wide crater formed around her when she hit the ground. "Princess!" "Aunty!" "You can take your 'peacceful ssolution' and sstick it up your *yay!*!" "Alright, go!" Twilight shouted. As soon as the Elements began to show signs of powering up, the specter turned and shot towards them. "Trying the ssame trick, are we?" it taunted. "Foolsss never learn—" A gigantic, pink, magical hammer swung in from the side, catching Luna in the ribs; the loud *thud* caused by the impact made everypony wince. "Woooooo yeah!" Cadance cheered, brandishing her weapon and swinging again. "Hahaha, take that! And that!" *Wham!* *Wham!* *Wham!* "Shining, what's wrong with Cadance?" Twilight asked apprehensively. "I've never seen her act so... bloodthirsty before." "Sometimes she gets like this, when something riles her up..." "Scary..." Without warning, another rope of dark magic wound its way quickly up the handle of the hammer, soon reaching the pink princess's head. It continued down and wrapped itself around her torso. "AH!" she yelped when it hurled her into the air. "Cadance!" Shining cried, clearly wanting to run to his wife's side. Unfortunately, he was duty-bound to guard the Element bearers. "Twily, hurry it up!" "I'm hurrying, I'm hurrying!" "Enough!" boomed a voice that nopony there except for Discord and Luna had ever heard before. From the crater where she had been thrown, an unscathed Princess Celestia emerged majestically. "Beast, come forth and test yourself against me!" With the Royal Canterlot voice powering her words, she appeared more terrible than could be imagined. Without hesitation, the dark alicorn launched herself forward, horn leading the way. She and Celestia clashed multiple times, but even though the sun princess put up an admirable fight, Luna slowly but surely was gaining the upper hoof. At last, Twilight felt the power of the Elements build inside of her. Finally! she thought as her body began to levitate and her eyes took on a white hue. The specter's eyes snapped over and it got a good look at what was about to happen before a white bolt of pure energy leaped from Twilight's horn, engulfing its target completely. "GAAAH!" the creature screamed in pain; its host flailed spasmodically from the attack's intensity. "Yeah, nice shot!" Rainbow cheered. "Something's not right..." the purple alicorn said. It's in pain, but shouldn't the specter have been forced out by now? Suddenly, she realized the trick. "It's an illusion! Look ou—" The ground erupted beneath them and the real Luna came forth. Her magic reached out and ripped the Elements of Harmony away from their bearers while, in the distance, the fake Luna faded into nothingness. The specter chuckled cruelly and brandished its plunder. "What hope do you have without thesse?" It threw the six pieces in six different directions, sending them all miles away. "Alright, the Elements have failed, so it's go time! Luna, prepare thy noggin!" A serpent snaked its way around Luna's torso—a serpent wielding a glowing frying pan named Steve. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Fluttershy's vision cleared as she stood and wiped the dirt from her eyes. "What... what happened?" she asked dazedly. She saw that of her friends, she and Twilight were the first ones to get up. "That thing took away the Elements," the purple alicorn informed her. "Discord's our only chance, now. In fact, you should try to wake up the other girls and get them away from here. From this point on, it's probably going to get too rough for you." "B-but... I can help..." Shining Armor leaped between the pegasus and their enemy. "You can help more by getting your friends to safety!" "O-okay..." She turned and shook Rarity's prone form. But after that... I'll be back, to do what I can! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The moment the specter saw Steve, its eyes narrowed, as if realizing the danger of being struck by the potent weapon. It sent a surge of electricity coursing through its body, giving Discord's constricting form a sizable shock. The dragonequis snarled and unwound himself. "It's not that easy to get rid of me," he said; a single lithe motion sent him diving underground. "You think I'm frightened?" the specter shouted. It leaped into the air, only to be slammed by the charging Celestia; Cadance contributed as well with a well-placed pair of kicks. "Now, Discord!" Celestia cried, moving away to give the dragonequis enough room to get a good swing in. A geyser of dirt and rock burst into the air as he shot upwards, weapon held at the ready. Unfortunately, the dark alicorn wasn't as stunned as she appeared; she flew backwards and released a barrage of magical bolts. "Pathetic," Discord laughed. His sinewy body easily slid this way and that to dodge the myriad projectiles. "Now, I can't say that I haven't ever dreamed of this moment..." His arm reared back to deliver the final blow. "Fluttershy!" Cadance called, and at the sound of his best friend's name, Discord's gaze snapped to where the pink princess was looking. One of Luna's fired bolts flew on a straight collision course for the yellow mare, and nopony was close enough to stop it. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After Fluttershy roused her friends back to wakefulness, she told them of Twilight's order to leave. However, when they reluctantly obeyed, she lagged behind the group, eventually turning back to return to the scene. Her eyes grew wide when Cadance and Celestia double-teamed the dark alicorn, and wider still when Discord made his move. She shrieked in concern for the dragonequis when Luna threw the magical projectiles, and breathed a sigh of relief when none of them hit him. Unfortunately, she saw that she would soon not be able to say the same for herself—one of the bolts that Discord had dodged was now coming right at her. "Fluttershy!" Cadance called in alarm. The pegasus knew that she was isolated from everypony else, and that she couldn't move quickly enough to get out of the way in time. Nopony had the ability to save her, but there was a certain dragonequis who did. A snap of his fingers teleported Discord into the attack's path in the blink of an eye, and before Fluttershy could protest his sacrifice, the crackling bolt struck him heavily in the chest. "Ouch!" he said, dropping to the ground with a groan. "Sheesh, she really doesn't like me!" "Are you al-alright?!" the pegasus asked frantically. "I suppose that I'm a bit out-of-sorts, yes. I know it seems counter-intuitive, but that tends to be what happens when you get hit with a stinkin' magical attack!" Up above, all of the alicorns joined the battle, Twilight included. The three each charged Luna in an effort to take her down before it was too late. However, as soon as they got close, the specter released a shockwave of dark energy that hit all three attackers at once; they fell out of the sky, energy spent. "This doesn't look good..." Discord muttered. "What can I do?" Fluttershy asked. "I'm still fine, I can help!" "Pssh, there's no way you—" He looked around again and saw that she was actually the only fit, winged pony left. "Alright, fine, you can help. Here." He held Steve out reluctantly, as if parting with it would be painful. "I can't just hit somepony! That's a terrible thing to do!" Discord gave her a wooden look. "I... but...How do you use it?" "How can you not know that?! You just whack her!" "But which side do I whack with?" "Oh, for cryin'... Look." The dragonequis pulled out a marker and scribbled something on the bottom of the pan. When he was finished, he revealed a hastily-drawn smiley face. "This is Steve's face. Say 'hello' to Steve's face. Bonk her with Steve's face. Got it?" "Okay...Hello, Steve's face..." She took the frying pan in both forelegs and slowly struggled to carry it with her into the sky. "I... I think... I think we're doomed," Discord said in a tone of finality. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Thisss iss amazing!" the specter crowed to its fallen foes. "Four of the mosst powerful beingss in exissstence, and I took them all down at once!" It caught sight of the little yellow pegasus who rose into the sky, frying pan in hoof. "Oh ho, you think to accomplisssh what your princesssess could not?" "I can't do this," Fluttershy mumbled to herself. "She's... she's too strong, and too big... and that thing's too mean..." "Fluttershy, go for it!" Twilight called, struggling to her hooves. "I know you can make it!" "Do it for love!" Cadance added. "Laaaaaaame!" Discord contributed. "That's right... If I just give up, then Luna will never be herself again." Her resolve hardened, and she raised Steve in preparation. "Alright, I'm ready!" Straining wings pushed her forward at her top speed, which in all honesty was fairly slow. "Hey, can she actually do this?" Cadance asked quietly. Twilight opened her mouth, but it was Celestia who answered. "As it stands, likely not. That's why we must lend her our assistance." Meanwhile, Fluttershy continued to approach her target. "I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry," she repeated quickly. "Squashing bugss iss no fun..." The specter was just about to blast the pegasus out of the sky when a handful of conjured sand burst into its face, courtesy of the fallen dragonequis. "GAH!" the beast screamed, blinded. Then, when it began to retreat, magical ropes from the other alicorns whipped up to hold the dark alicorn still. "Sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry," the yellow mare continued to chant. A trio of wicked-looking javelins materialised in mid-air, and Luna's magic propelled them unerringly at the approaching mare. "Eeep!" Flutterhsy squeaked in terror, thinking that she was finished this time for sure, but again, aid came unexpectedly. The javelins bounced harmlessly off of a shield conjured by an encouraging Shining Armor. "I got your back!" he shouted. "Just do what you need to do!" The pegasus lunged forward to close the remaining distance. "I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry..." At this point, Fluttershy was virtually on top of her target, too close for the ensnared alicorn to get away. Still blinded and thus unable to see its target, the specter whipped Luna's horn across in a desperate bid to save itself. It missed by a mile. "I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm so sorry..." The yellow mare brought Steve crashing against the side of Luna's head. "Sorry, I'm sorry!" *Booooooong!* The reverberations on the pan made a sound like a gong when it came into contact with the unfortunate alicorn's skull. Except for the fading remnants of sound caused by metal striking bone, the battlefield was wholly silent, with every pony and a single dragonequis looking on expectantly. Then, a loud sucking noise filled the air, and Fluttershy disappeared from sight. Both Luna and Steve fell lifelessly to the ground. Ch 13: In Which Fluttershy is a Badflank Motherclopper, and Luna Meets an Old FriendFluttershy's eyes opened slowly to reveal... nothing; the darkness was absolute. She couldn't even see the ground beneath her hooves. "Hello...?" she called out hesitantly. The words echoed eerily around her. "Is anypony there?" "Thisss ssurprissess me," came a voice from the black void, causing the pegasus to shriek and flinch backwards. "You have ssomehow... made it to thisss placce... Well, let uss sssee what makesss you tick." Something pressed into Fluttershy's mind, and she felt it rummage through her thoughts. "W-wait! Don't do that! Those are—" Suddenly, she stood in Twilight's library, as if she had been there the entire time. Although there wasn't anypony else in the room with her, a series of loud, repetitive grunts informed the mare that she wasn't alone. "Twilight..." came a breathy voice that Fluttershy just barely recognized as Luna's. "Oh, Luna..." responded a pony that could only be the youngest alicorn. The words seemed to come from the library's bedroom, and judging from the nature of the atmosphere, the yellow mare didn't even want to go look. However, curiousity got the better of her, and she found her legs slowly taking her up the stairs. I... I hope this isn't what I think it is.... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Well, that was unexpected." Discord had regained enough strength to stand and approach the fallen Luna. "You didn't even know that it would do that?!" a red-faced Twilight Sparkle shouted. "Why would you let Fluttershy go if you were unaware of the properties of your own weapon?!" "Actually, I was talking about her getting in a good hit in the first place," the dragonequis said. "I mean, c'mon, did any of you really see that coming?" "Discord..." Celestia said, a warning clear in her voice. "What happened to Fluttershy?" He shrugged. "Honestly? I don't know. I thought that the specter would be forced out, but I guess she was forced in." "So... now what?" asked Cadance. "I suppose now she's going to have some sort of inner struggle, or whatever you kids like to do these days," Discord said. "Ah, but she'll be fine. I have full confidence in her." He pulled out a magazine and began to casually flip through its pages. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After minutes of creeping progress, Fluttershy finally reached the library's bedroom door and peeked in, only to have her heart break at the sight within. Twilight and Luna both lay in the bed, together...doing... The pegasus lurched away, closing the door quickly while trying her best to not cry. Why did it have to be Luna? she wondered. Out of all the ponies Twilight could have chosen, it had to be the one that I.... Suddenly, she realized the improbability of the scenario. No, that can't be real, the mare thought slowly. I'm sure that she and Twilight are just friends. And anyway, Luna was just possessed! She wouldn't do something like this so soon after— "Your outer weaknesss hidesss your true... well, nevermind. Time for a change of ssscenery." Fluttershy blinked in shock when the entire library melted and became indistinguishable before reforming into another familiar setting—her cottage's sitting room. She turned to take in her new surroundings, but was interrupted when a familiar dark-blue pony shoved her roughly. "Luna?" she asked. "What's going—" "Do not speak with me, worm." The harsh words instantly set the yellow mare rocking backwards. "Filth like you should just curl up in a corner and die." "Why—why would you say that?" Fluttershy said; tears streamed down her cheeks and dripped onto the floor. Calm down; this is just like before. She can't be— "You disgust me. Pitiful little bug, thinking that you can win the love of a goddess." "I-I-I'm sorry, it's not s-something I c-can help—" "Disappear and leave me be. I never want to see you again." Luna stalked outside and flew away. This is terrible... Fluttershy cried in her head, trying to get a grip on her emotions. I... this can't be real, I know this isn't real, but still... The mare's mind flew back and recalled all of the time the two ponies had spent together, and the pitiable expression on her face vanished. "No, Luna wouldn't believe things like that! Even to an enemy, she would never say anything so cruel. It's a lie!" The last sentence rang out with her full volume behind it. "Fine! If you cannot be broken with illussionsss, then how about fear?!" The room faded away and, once more, the pegasus stood in complete darkness, gazing into the black void; this time, however, a macabre face stared back. Its green eyes danced in deeply-sunken sockets. "BEHOLD YOUR DOOM!" "I'm—I'm not scared of you anymore," she said softly. "...What did you ssay?" "I said that I'm not scared of you anymore!" The specter screamed its fury. "I COULD RIP YOU APART IN AN INSssTANT!" "I've... I've been thinking, and I don't think you're strong enough to do that. It's true that using Luna's power, you can do just about anything, but the real 'you' is just a tiny little parasite." "You impudent—" "You're weak in real life, just like I am. I think I can understand you... just a little." "Sspare your sssympathy and prepare to die!" A pair of hands appeared, each bearing wicked claws. "Fine, if you're going to do it, then just get it over with!" Fluttershy said. Her anger, normally extremely slow to rise, began to spill over. "What are you waiting for? I'm right here!" For a second, she thought that her opponent was going to tear her to pieces, so terrible was the wrath displayed in its eyes. However, her misgivings vanished as another few moments passed and it made no moves to attack. When nothing happened, she released the breath that she had been holding. "Now, I just have to find Luna." "That'ss not ssomething I'll jussst let you do," the specter argued. "Hush, you. Now that I know your secret, nothing you say can change my mind. Luuunaaa!" The alicorn's name bounced off of walls that Fluttershy couldn't see. "Quit that!" "It's time to wake up, sleepyhead!" The pegasus felt something stir in the depths of the void. "I ssaid stop!" "Come back to us! We want to see you again!" Once again, an invisible presence shifted, as if agitated. "Wait, pleasse, don't do this!!" "Your friends are waiting for you, Luna. We miss you." The stirring became more pronounced, and something woke up. "I miss you." ...Fluttershy? A bright light filled the void, blinding Fluttershy, before she fell unconscious once more. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Twilight was just beginning to grow bored from waiting when a trickle of darkness streamed out of Luna's ear. "Princess Celestia!" she shouted, reaching out and snagging the escaping creature in a magical sphere before it could get further away. The specter beat itself against the inside of the prison, but it was finally captured. "Oo, nice catch!" Cadence said. Celestia examined the trapped creature closely. "I think we'll decide its fate at a later time. For now, we should take care of our brave pegasus friend..." "But Fluttershy's still gon—Fluttershy!" The yellow mare had appeared, lying on the ground next to Luna. Everypony present clustered around her, wanting to see if she was alright. However, the group scattered when the prone alicorn jumped to her hooves and grabbed her savior by the shoulders. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Fluttershy's mind swam through a sea of darkness as it struggled to reach the surface. Something's... moving? She heard muffled noises that grew progressively louder, until she recognized them as voices. "Are you alright?!" Are they talking to me? she wondered. "Just give her a little shake, I guess." The confused pegasus suddenly felt a lurching sensation as somepony wrenched her back and forth. Her eyes shot open, and she immediately identified the culprit as Luna. "St-o-o-o-p," the pegasus said in a wavering voice. "I'm awake!" "I see... My apologies." The alicorn averted her eyes and lightly blushed. "The keyword was 'little'," said Discord. It took a moment, but Fluttershy's memories soon came rushing back and she remembered all that had happened. There, sitting in front of her, was Luna, white-eyed Luna, her Luna. In an instant, the alicorn found herself bowled over by a hug that could have doubled as a flying-tackle. "You're okay!" the choked-up yellow mare managed to say, crying into the other pony's neck. "You're really, really okay!" "Yes, Fluttershy, I am. It is all thanks to you." Everypony else (and Discord) gave her a sour look. "A-and all of you, as well," she amended hastily. By this time, Fluttershy had saturated her friend's coat with tears. The princess wrapped her legs around the little pony and pulled her close. "I-I'm s-s-sorry," the pegasus said, looking up and seeing that Luna's face bore tear-streaks as well. "Yo-you're cr-cry-crying, because of m-me..." "Do not say that. I am *hic* not crying." Luna pushed Fluttershy's head back down. "*sniff* I never cry." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Ow!" "Sorry, sorry!" "Aw, does wittle Wuna's boo-boo hurt?" "Discord..." Now that Luna was safe, nothing further compelled Celestia, Cadance, or Shining Armor to remain in Ponyville. The two princesses departed almost immediately for their respective cities, Cadance accompanied by her complaining husband. "Please, let me walk! I don't wanna ride the train agaaaaain!" he cried while the pink mare dragged him away. Rarity and Applejack also took their leaves in order to see to their respective jobs. They congratulated Luna on her freedom before heading back to the town proper. So it was that Luna, Fluttershy, Twilight, Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, and Discord congregated outside of the timid pegasus's house while she pressed a bag of ice against the dark princess's cooking-implement-related injury. "I know that Cadance is responsible for these bruises," Luna said, pointing to the spot on her ribs where her niece had pummeled her with a hammer, "but which one of my fellow princesses inflicted this wound upon me?" She gestured at the welt on the side of her head. Discord pushed Fluttershy forward, who nearly fell over in an effort to apologize. "Actually, it was this little fireball, here. Whacked you right on the noggin with a frying pan. I'm so jealous..." "I cannot complain about it..." Luna gave the panicking mare a smile. "To have raised such a lump on my royal cranium, you must have quite the powerful swing. Do you take part in that one athletic activity which I have seen ponies play?" "Huh?" "The one on the diamond-shaped field." Pinkie raised her hoof. "Oh, oh! You mean baseball!" "Hah, she's totally right! Fluttershy, you should find a team to play for!" Rainbow said with a snicker. "I know you still want to get to second base!" She and the pink pony fell over laughing. "No—but—you—I—" Fluttershy's face glowed from the resulting blush, and Luna didn't help matters when she loudly proclaimed her intention to assist the pegasus in "reaching this so-called 'second base'". "She's so ignorant, it's almost not totally hilarious..." Discord muttered. Then, to Luna, he said, "I'm bored to tears being around all of you, so I'm going to bail before I have to lobotomize myself. I just need to say something, first." He coughed into his hand. "Luna, you are one of the stuffiest, dryest, grumpiest, least-interesting ponies that I have ever met, and yes, that even includes you, Sparkle." "Hey!" the purple mare protested. "However..." The dragonequis paused and sighed. "Being around you is just a teensy, tiny bit less awful than that thing that was renting out the chunk of solid bone you call a head." "Is that... a compliment?!" Luna asked incredulously. "No! It's not! I still think you're the worst! Whatever, I'm out of here." He disappeared in a cloud of eerie, laughing butterflies. "That was surprisingly nice of him..." she mused. "I shall never let him forget this! Ha, you have erred this time, Discord, you miscreant!" Suddenly, the princess felt something small and furry land on her back. "Luna, look!" Fluttershy exclaimed. "Someone's come to play with you!" Craning her neck, Luna's blood chilled when she saw that the thing on her back was a squirrel... and she knew which one, in particular. The demon critter's head slowly rotated in place until it rested at a very unnatural one-eighty degree angle, blazing-red eyes staring deep into her soul. "Fear will stalk you for the remainder of your miserable existence," Phineas informed the alicorn. "Away, darkspawn!" Luna cried, the force of her voice lifting the squirrel into the air. It landed gracefully on all fours. "In your final days, I will whisper terrible nothings in your decaying ears until you beg for death." "See how much they like each other?" Fluttershy said with a huge smile on her face. "Yeah, he's a cutie!" Pinkie contributed. The dark alicorn looked at all of them, aghast. "It is literally impossible that thou cannot hear this... this... demon's words!" Twilight trotted over and nuzzled the little squirrel lovingly. "Luna, are you alright?" she asked. "Fluttershy did hit you pretty hard, after all." "Yeah, everypony knows that squirrels can't talk," Rainbow said. "The words of portent are for you and you alone. When you finally feel safe, the shadows will consume you. They are always watching." "This is not over, squirrel," Luna promised, turning and stomping away indignantly. Author's Note And so it was that harmony was restored and the specter was defeated. However, a number of unresolved issues still remained. Will Luna and Fluttershy ever get together? Could Discord be crushing on Twilight? Will Phineas drive Luna to insanity? Is Shining Armor going to be sick on the train ride home? Will Twilight ever be useful? And, most importantly, what is Steve's ultimate fate? Tune in next time, on Ponyball Z! (Extra) Ch 14: In Which the Plot Thickens, Luna is Asked to Dangle, and Sexual Jokes are MadeIn a move that surprised exactly zero ponies, Pinkie threw a party to celebrate Luna's liberation from the hands of the specter; everypony in town received an invitation to join in the festivities. Sugarcube Corner was filled to the brim with party-goers that evening as they all arrived to take part in one of Pinkie's lauded fêtes. The party stretched well into the night before it began to show signs of slowing down. One by one, tired ponies trundled out the door, waving farewell to their friends and thanking the pink earth pony for the invitation. Eventually, the event devolved into an "after-party" of sorts, consisting of the element bearers and Luna. That isn't to say that things got boring—in fact, Luna found herself having even more fun, now that it was just her and her friends. Rarity and Rainbow got into a slight argument over what a real "mare" was, but made up almost instantly. Applejack showed off her skills at juggling while Twilight and Luna lobbed increasingly heavy items her way. They all even managed to persuade Fluttershy to sing a little bit before she became too embarrassed to continue and clamped her mouth shut. For Luna, the hours blurred together in a wave of euphoria that made it seem as if it was unreal, a mere dream from which she would soon awake. At one point, in the throes of a sugar-high brought on from drinking a cup of Pinkie's infamous "death punch", she grabbed the yellow pegasus and, after thanking the mare heartily once more, planted a firm kiss on the wildly-blushing pony's cheek. "Luna..." Just thinking about that kiss made the alicorn's face redden slightly. Maybe that wasn't such a good idea... she thought. "Oh, Luuuuuuunaaaaaa..." Ah, what's past is past, nothing I can— "Luna! Come in, Luna!" The dark princess shook her head, dispelling her daydreams and returning to reality. She found herself standing at her sister's side on the stairs leading into the royal palace. Celestia gave her a worried look. "Sorry, sister, I was lost in thought," Luna said. "You don't say," Celestia replied. "C'mon, help me out here, I don't want to have to do all the greeting by myself! Good evening," she said to a passing mare. "But Ceeellyyyy," the other alicorn whined, "the Grand Galloping Gala is so boring!" A nearby noble heard this and frowned. "Heh, sorry..." "Do you have anything to do right now that would be a better use of your time? I hear that Hamfist has more paperwork that he needs you to fill out, if you'd rather take care of that." "Ugh, speak not of paperwork, I implore you." Over the past month, Luna had been presented with form after form, packet after packet, and waiver after waiver. Apparently, when a virtually all-powerful deity was possessed by an evil entity, such as the specter, there was a great deal of clerical work that said-deity was required to complete. At that moment, Luna suspected that she would snap and her vision would go red if she caught sight of even a single scrap of parchment, and may a god stronger than she help anypony who tried to stand in the way of the resulting rampage. "I still do not understand the point of our being here. Why are we, the sovereign rulers of this land, required to stand in one place all night long? Hello there, that is a very...er, nice... hat you have." "That's just how these things are done, Luna. Greetings, welcome to the gala!" "You cannot use that excuse on me anymore!" Luna protested. "Salutations, I am glad to see you!" To Celestia, she continued. "Bah, whatever, have it your way if you must." "I must." "Just so you know, I expect to receive the biggest box of doughnuts available after this..." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ In another area of the palace, the air was significantly less festive. A guard stood at attention in front of a door, above which hung a sign that read, "Laboratory". "Why'd I gotta get lab-guard duty?" he grumbled to himself. "All the others got to go to the gala, but nooooooo, let's have old Stomper watch over the test tubes!" "You certainly have gotten the short end of the stick, hm?" The voice caught Stomper by surprise, as he hadn't been expecting to meet anypony there until his relief showed up in a couple of hours. However, a pale-purple unicorn mare with a stunningly well-kept white mane defied those expectations and now stood before him. "I-I-Identify yourself!" the guard barked, remembering himself and shutting his jaw before a bug flew down his throat. "Just a curious party-goer." She sauntered over to stand close by him and batted her eyelids. "I hear that there's something very interesting being kept in the castle lab these days, and I just wanted to have a look..." "Sorry, Miss, uh..." The mare didn't offer her name. "...Miss Whatever, but nopony is allowed—" "Aw, relax a little!" she said with a pout. "I promise that I'll... make it worth your while..." Now she was close enough for him to smell perfume. Stomper gulped, eyes darting back and forth as sweat began to drip down his face. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Twenty minutes later, the light-purple mare pranced happily out of the castle gates, a large sack slung over her back. Two other unicorns, both stallions, one blue and one red, fell into step beside her. "You got it, right?" the red one asked her. "Tch, 'course I do. Do you think I'm some kind of slacker?" The other stallion raised an eyebrow questioningly. "How did you get by the guard?" "Oh, I just gave him what every stallion wants from a beautiful mare in the middle of the night." The two males snickered, earning them each a confused look. "What?" "We never thought you'd give away your body like that, is all." "Wait, what?!" the mare screeched. "Get your minds out of the gutter, you—you... sickos! Snacks, I gave him snacks! Tons and tons of junk food! You bunch of perverts!" "Oh." The blue stallion's face fell. "That's a lot less interesting. Anyway, you should work on your phrasing, so ponies don't misunderstand you." "Most ponies don't have screwed-up thoughts," she muttered. "Getting back on topic... you're sure you got the right one?" "You two are really riding me hard tonight." They began to chuckle again, and the mare realized once more what she had intimated. "Grow up, you two!" As soon as they stifled their laughter, she dropped the bag onto the ground and, using her magic, pulled out a transparent orb. Inside it was an inky substance, somewhere between shadow and liquid. However, their attention instead focused on the malicious green eyes that stared out hatefully; only the magical nature of its prison prevented the specter from possessing its current captors. "Yep, that seems right," the red stallion said. "Let's get it back, and I'll see if I can extract anything useful from its memories." The other stallion wrung his hooves together. "And then we'll know everything we need to deal with our sweet princess." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Thank you for waking up to walk with me, dear." "It's alright, I couldn't sleep, either." Rarity and Fluttershy made their way slowly through the darkened streets of Ponyville. Clouds from an earlier storm hid the night sky from sight, denying everypony a view of Luna's brilliant starscape. A few twinkling points of light appeared through gaps, and the moon itself made an appearance from time to time, but in general, there was little of note to see. Hopefully it'll clear up soon, the pegasus thought as she gazed upwards. Rarity glanced over and saw where her friend was looking; a sly smile spread across the white mare's face. "So, how goes the quest for Luna's affections?" "What?" Fluttershy's heart jumped and her cheeks reddened instantly. "I—that is, she—why—" The unicorn chuckled and pulled her friend into a light embrace. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry... I couldn't help but tease. But in all seriousness, have you put any thought into pursuing her?" "I... I have..." "Really?! Well don't keep me in the dark, what do you plan to do?!" "I've, um, decided that I'm n-not going to do, um, anything." For a few seconds, Rarity was at a loss for words and could only stare at the pegasus blankly. Finally, she found her voice. "I apologize, could you repeat that for me?" "I'm not g-going to d-do any—" "Yes yes, that's what I thought I heard." She exhaled wearily. "That doesn't seem to me like a very good way to start a relationship with somepony." "I don't want to start a relationship," Fluttershy said. The other mare took a moment to ponder this apparent conundrum.; she soon realized what her friend was getting at. "Oh, now I see. Let me guess, it's because of some nonsense like, 'She's immortal, she won't want to be with a mortal pony', or, 'Why would a princess love a common pony like me?'" "Actually, that's very clo—" "It's also very ridiculous!" Rarity daintily stomped to accentuate her point. "It's not that you don't want to start a relationship, but rather that you're scared to start a relationship. You have seen no signs that would indicate that she doesn't like you, am I correct?" The pegasus nodded her head. "And you know that your own feelings are very strong, correct?" Again, a nod. "Then it is your obligation—no, your solemn duty—to use all of your might to court the pony you love!" That last statement threw Fluttershy off-balance. "I-I'm not sure I follow." "Look at it this way, then. You are certain of your own feelings, but not her's. What if she's the same as you?" "But what if she's not?" "Then she'll tell you herself when the time comes," Rarity said. "Luna's thoughts and emotions are for her to decide, not you. Do you understand?" "I—yes, I think so." "Excellent! Now, let us discuss tactics..." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Free at last, oh thank you thank you thank you," Luna breathed to nopony in particular as she took to the sky. When Celestia finally declared the greeting period to be over, the lunar princess had taken that as her cue to make like a banana and leave. Ah, my poor legs, so stiff... She stretched her limbs out, gasping in sudden relief when the tendons cracked. Normally, at this time of night, Luna would be dropping off into sleep, but she was in no mood for that at the moment. She felt far too restless to slumber, so she instead decided to see where her wings would carry her; the mare was barely even surprised when she found herself turning towards Ponyville. There's no way anypony will be awake, she thought when the village came into view. Not this late at night. Sure enough, Twilight's library was closed; no lights shone from inside. Luna briefly considered hopping into the younger alicorn's dreams for a bit, but ultimately decided against it. She had long ago learned to avoid the dreams of anypony close to her, due to a circumstance involving Celestia, a ferret, a piece of string, and a boat-load of pineapples. To that day, the princess of the sun had not wholly forgiven her sister for that. Luna turned from the tree-house and soared around the rest of the town. Her mind began to calm a bit when she saw that she was the only one awake, and a yawn escaped her mouth. Just as she resolved to turn and head back home for some rest, her keen eyes spotted movement below. "Aha, success!" she said under her breath. Her wings came in close and she dove towards the ground, corkscrewing while she did so. At the last moment, the feathery appendages flared out and halted her downward motion, allowing the princess to touch down lightly. "Eeek!" squeaked Fluttershy when the black shadow whizzed into view. In an instant, she was hiding in a nearby bush, eyes peeking cautiously out. "Bravo!" Rarity cheered, stomping her appluase. "Yes, thank you, thank you." The princess bowed low. "I speak truly when I say that I am delighted to find that there are still two... um, where did Fluttershy go?" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Oh dear oh dear, how much did she hear? How long has she been listening? Was she above us the whole time? This is bad bad bad bad! These thoughts and more ran through poor Fluttershy's head when she realized that it was Luna who had swooped down upon them and not some giant, evil, terrifying monster come to eat her and Rarity. "Heh heh, I'll be right back," Rarity told the princess, trotting over to where the pegasus hid. "Fluttershy!" she whispered urgently. "This is your big chance!" "What do you mean?" the yellow mare hissed back. "Wasn't she listening to everything we talked about?" "Of course not, she just got here. Alright, here's what you should tell her." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Another long yawn cracked Luna's jaw while the other two mares held a hushed conversation between themselves. Finally, they wrapped it up, and Rarity pushed her reluctant friend forward. "Good evening to you," the princess said with a forced smile that she meant to be disarming, but in reality came off as slightly grotesque. "U-u-um, L-Luna..." Fluttershy stuttered. "Um, um, w-will you, um..." Something is the matter. Am I frightening her again? "Please be not afraid, dear Fluttershy. I apologize for scaring you; it was not my intention." "No, it's not th-that." The pegasus drew herself up and swallowed heavily. "Um, are you, um, free, tomorrow?" "I am in fact not busy tomorrow, but why...?" Luna's face lit as realization dawned upon her. "Oh oh! You want to dangle!" When she only received blank stares, the princess clarified. "Dangle out?" "Hang out?" Rarity offered, to which Luna nodded enthusiastically. "Yes!" Fluttershy scuffed a clump of grass with her hoof. "If it's okay with you..." "Of course it is! Yes, what shall we do?" The pegasus glanced at her unicorn friend as if to say, "What now? I didn't think this far ahead." Rarity came forward and whispered a few words into her ear. "Um, would you like to see a movie?" Fluttershy asked. "Then we could... get dinner... or something..." She hid behind her pink mane, the blush on her cheeks going completely unnoticed. "Woohoo!" the alicorn cheered. "I have never—" A nearby window slammed open and an aged stallion stuck his head out. "You kids shut up, some of us are tryin' to get some sleep!" he shouted. "And stay off my lawn! In my day, we didn't bother our elders, ten miles in the snow, uphill both ways..." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After Luna gave her farewells and flew away (and after Rarity shouted the time of the movie after her, because a supremely nervous Fluttershy had forgotten to mention it), the little pegasus once more found herself shaking; however, this time the anxiety came from sheer excitement instead of fear. "Fluttershy! Calm down!" the unicorn said with a chuckle. "At this rate, you'll wear yourself out!" "But this is so wonderful! Thank you for not letting me back off!" "Just get some sleep, and everything will be fine. I'm so happy for you! This is the first step towards something beautiful, just you wait and see." "Thank you..." Sudden weariness descended on the little mare, and she realized how fatigued she really was. "I think... *yawn*... I'll get some rest." "I'll bring by the tickets tomorrow," Rarity promised. They exchanged a few more words, then went their separate ways, each with a bounce in her gait. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Luna shambled down the hallway towards her private chambers, feeling more and more tired with each hoof she dragged along the ground. However, when she reached her door, she was surprised to find Hamfist standing guard outside. "Is something wrong?" she asked the sentry. "Princess Celestia has requested that you attend her!" the zealous guard said, snapping off a salute. "She awaits your arrival inside!" What does Celly want with... When Luna pushed her way inside and saw what sat on her bed, her eyes grew as wide as plates, and all of her fatigue quickly vanished. "There you are! I was wondering when you were going to get back!" Princess Celestia lounged on Luna's mattress, next to a box filled with enough doughnuts to feed Pinkie Pie for a whole hour. "Dough...nuts..." the dark alicorn intoned reverently, moving to sit beside her sister. She was about to reach in when she paused and looked beseechingly into the white alicorn's eyes. "Tia, can I...?" "Ha, help yourself-" The words had barely left her mouth when Luna's magic grabbed hold of a half dozen of the baked goods and shoveled them down her throat. "Geez, I'm glad your manners are better in public..." The two sisters shared an amiable conversation (well, more like Celestia talked while Luna nodded and chewed) while they made their way through the box. The princess of the night's good mood was contagious, and the normally emotionally guarded Celestia found herself laughing and talking more than she had in a long time. Just as Luna began to feel the slightest bit stuffed, a thought occurred to her. "Is Hamfist still outside?" she asked. Her sister looked at her askance. "I'd bet my crown on it. Why do you ask?" Without answering, Luna hopped to her feet and walked to the door. "Hamfist, come in," she said to him, stepping aside to allow the guard entry. "Have a doughnut." He halted in front of the humongous box. "A... doughnut?" "Don't hold back on our accounts," Celestia added, nudging the container forward. "But I've never had..." Expressions of shock crossed the alicorns' faces. "You what?" the white mare cried, while her sister yelled, "Blasphemy!" "That settles it. You have to eat at least one." Luna sat on her haunches and watched him expectantly. "I guess just one won't hurt." The stallion's horn lit and he pulled a simple glazed ring out of the box with a levitation spell. With both mares watching, he self-consciously took a small bite. To most ponies, the tiny smile that formed on his face wouldn't have indicated much, but to the two princesses, who knew Hamfist's stoic and sour demeanour, it spoke volumes. "It's not bad." Me, being nice to Hamfist, Luna thought wryly. Next thing you know, I'll be hugging Discord. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The next morning, a very tired stallion finished exploring the mind of the specter. He locked the beast away in a dark cabinet before going to report to his superior. "Hey, Shower," he shouted to the light-purple mare when he finally found her, "I finished up with my research." "That's 'May Shower' to you," she corrected him. When he proffered a stack of messily scribbled notes, May took hold of them with her magic and began to read through. By the time she reached the final sheet, a light grin had spread across her face. "So, she has a love interest, eh?" "That appears to be the case." "Hmmm..." The mare put a hoof to her chin and thought deeply about what she should do with that information. "I guess the best thing to do would be to disrupt that relationship," she decided at last. "At the very least it'll distract her." "Is 'distracting' Princess Luna good enough for our purposes?" the stallion asked. "Look, don't go questioning me, okay? I've thought long and hard about all of—what's so funny?!" He forced himself to stop chuckling. "N-nothing, May." "Wait, long and har... seriously, grow the hay up!" Author's Note Little did Luna realize the chain of events that she set in motion that fateful night when she offered Hamfist a doughnut. A new pony was born that day, one that craved the taste of ringed confections, be they iced, glazed, powdered, filled, or a combination of all of the above. However, he discovered that, no matter how many he ate, he never grew full or gained weight. The stallion recognized this gift for what it was, and vowed to put it to use for the good of ponykind. He now prowls the streets during the late hours, delivering baked justice to those who would disrupt the peaceful existence of doughnut-loving ponies everywhere. Aided by his sidekick, the faithful Turkeycock, by day he is Hamfist the guard, and by night, he is... The Doughnut. (Extra) Ch 15: In Which Rarity's Plan Almost Backfires, and Celestia Reveals Her Bad Side"Ugh..." Luna groaned as a shaft of sunlight fell upon her closed eye. She shifted herself in an attempt to evade the nuisance, but the stubborn beam refused to let her be. Finally, after a full minute of resisting, the princess lifted her eyelids and sat up, glancing around while a yawn stretched her jaw open to capacity. On the bed next to her slept Princess Celestia, specks of icing all over her muzzle from the doughnut binge of the previous night. As if the thought of eating had been a cue, the dark alicorn's stomach twinged in protest. I suppose consuming one's weight in doughnuts does not make for a good diet, she mused ruefully. She slid to her hooves and groaned once more as her belly lurched. Nope, definitely not a good diet. "Whhaaaaaat's goooing ooooon?" warbled a raspy voice from behind. Luna's eyes widened in terror and her knees began to quake; she knew whose voice it was. "Whoo woke me uup?" The lunar princess turned slowly while easing her way to the door. "N-now Tia, why don't you just go back to sleep. There's no need to do anything hasty." On the bed, Celestia pushed herself onto her forelegs and cast a bleary gaze at her sister. A pair of incredibly sunken, dark eyes stared out from underneath a muted rainbow mane that was definitely not swirling as it usually did. On unsteady hooves, she stood and began to stalk forward, towards the frightened blue mare. A quick burst of motion saw Luna out the door and down the hallway in a flash. "Flee!" she cried to anypony who would heed her words. "The Terrifying Monster of the Morning is upon us! Flee, I say!" Celestia's nightmarish head poked past her sister's door, her expression decidedly bewildered. "Iiis theere somethiing on myy facce??" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Fluttershy, let's go over the checklist again." Twilight held her quill pressed up against the parchment, ready to start checking things off. "We've already done this five times," the pegasus protested. "But these things are important!" Twilight said. "What if you forget something because you didn't go over the list?" "I would listen to her, if I were you," Rarity added. "You do want this to go well, don't you?" The two other mares gathered in Fluttershy's cottage in order to assist her in preparing for the impending date. When she had found out about it, Twilight had insisted upon helping make certain that her friend got to live happily ever after with her one, true love (Twilight's words, not Fluttershy's). "Then we can all write a letter to Princess Celestia to tell her what we learned!" the alicorn had exclaimed with a goofy smile, giddily bouncing in place like a filly half her age. Rarity's expression upon hearing that had been dubious at best, and Fluttershy's had become downright mortified; something about writing a note to the princess about dating her sister just didn't appeal to the pegasus in the slightest. "Alright, I guess once more won't hurt..." Fluttershy said, caving in. "Yay! Item number one—movie tickets." "Check." "Good, checklist complete!" Twilight folded it neatly and slid it into a binder specifically meant to contain used lists. "You can't be too prepared, after all." "Do you girls really think this will be fine?" Fluttershy asked. Her voice wavered and her knees began to quake as her frayed nerves took control. "Darling, come here." Rarity threw a leg around her friend's shoulders and pulled her close. "The most important thing to remember is that Luna is at least as nervous as you are!" "Is she really?" Fluttershy said, daring to lift her head to look into the unicorn's eyes. "Definitely." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Woohoo!" Luna cheered during her morning gallop as her mane whipped back and forth in the wind. "Today is going to be great! I feel so happy, I'm not even slightly nervous!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Well, if you say so..." Fluttershy inhaled deeply, then slowly let the air out. "I do feel a little better." "What time are you supposed to meet her?" Twilight asked. "At ten o'clock." "What?! That's only an hour and a half from now! You have to get going now, or else you won't be sufficiently early!" Rarity smacked a hoof against her forehead. "The theater's only a five-minute walk from here, dear; I don't think time is something we need to worry about." "But—but—fine, have it your way." "Would either of you like some breakfast?" Fluttershy offered. "I thought I'd make some oatmeal." "That would be marvelous!" Twilight followed the pegasus into the kitchen. "Yeah, sounds good! Can I help?" Images of mushroom clouds and vaporized ponies assailed the other two mares at the thought of letting their alicorn friend assist in the cooking. "No!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The Celestia that Luna broke her fast with was in a far better state than the Celestia from earlier that morning. Gone were the sunken eyes, the matted mane, and the raspy, I've-come-for-your-soul voice; the zombie-pony was no more, replaced by the alicorn princess that all in Equestria knew (although maybe not personally) and loved (also maybe not personally). "What are your plans for the day?" she asked, sipping at a glass of juice. "I shall be in Ponyville for most of it." Luna speared a large hunk of pancake onto a fork and stuffed it all into her mouth at once. Apparently, her stomach ache had long since resolved itself. "Ay oh ot when Ay ell ee eh-ing ack." "Sorry, I don't speak 'mouth full of food'," Celestia said. Luna had the grace to blush before swallowing and repeating herself. "I said, 'I know not when I shall be getting back'." "Well, please say 'hello' to Twilight for me." "I... am not certain if I will see her today, but if I do, I shall pass on your greetings." Not going to see Twilight? the white alicorn thought, mildly surprised. "Do you have some kind of official function to perform there that will prevent you from having leisure time?" "No, I am merely taking part in dinner and a movie with Fluttershy." Fascinating... Celestia had been present when the pegasus accidentally proclaimed her feelings for everypony to hear, and thus wasn't wholly caught off-guard by this turn of events. "That sounds lovely. I hope you have a good day." "You, too!" With that, Luna bounced to her feet and shot out the door, ready to have as much fun as she could. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ It's almost time... I hope she remembers. But, of course she'll remember. What if she suddenly doesn't want to be here? So much could go wrong, I shouldn't get my hopes up. Or should I? If I get my hopes up, then maybe I'll be more fun to spend time with! Oh, but what would happen if things don't work out? Then I'd feel terrible... Maybe I should panic. Yes, panicking sounds like a good idea; I'll go with that. With these thoughts whirling through her head, Fluttershy was quickly winding herself up while she nervously waited for the lunar princess to arrive. "Psst, Fluttershy!" The yellow mare glanced at a nearby bush, behind which Twilight and Rarity hid; the unicorn poked her head out in order to get her friend's attention. "Everything will be fine! Just concentrate on having a lovely time!" Lovely time... Yes, this is going to be fun, isn't it? "Thanks, Rarity," she whispered back. "What are we whispering about?" Twilight asked in an obliviously loud voice. "Hush! She's coming!" The two observing mares ducked back out of sight, just in time to avoid being seen by Luna. "Greetings!" the princess said cheerfully to her waiting friend. "I'm not late, am I?" "No no, I only got here a few, um, minutes ago." Fluttershy shook her head, and the two tickets drifted out of her mane and fell to the ground. "Here are the tickets." They each took one and, side by side, trotted into the theater, chatting animatedly every step of the way. Within no time, the two found their seats in a darkened room filled with a multitude of other ponies. "Are you looking forward to the movie?" Fluttershy asked. "Almost as much as I looked forward to crushing the skull of Ivan the Monstrous against the rocks!" Luna said enthusiastically, smacking a hoof heavily on the floor to emphasize the "crushing" part. Both the pegasus and a number of nearby ponies gave the alicorn shocked looks, and she let out an embarrassed chuckle. "Heh, I mean, yes, I am anticipating this movie very much indeed." After another moment's pause, she added, "By the way, what is a 'movie'?" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As soon as Luna and Fluttershy disappeared into the theater, both Rarity and Twilight emerged from their concealment. "I seem to be spending more time in foliage than normal, these days," the unicorn observed, pulling twigs out of her mane. "It's not a trend I can say I'm fond of." "So what do we do while they're watching the movie?" Twilight asked. "We wait here, I suppose. I thought that something like this would happen, so I made certain to be prepared." She flipped open her bag and pulled out a pack of playing cards. "Now tell me, Twilight, do you know how to play 'Go Fish'?" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Drifting listlessly through the pleasantly warm air, Rainbow Dash fought the urge to fall asleep right then and there. I should find a cloud, she decided, looking around for a place suitable for napping. "No no no, you don't just get to look at my cards!" "But then how do I know you're not hiding any aces?" "Twilight, you wound me! Can you not trust what I say?" The mare's ears perked up when she recognized the arguing voices; she glanced at the ground so far below and realized that she was directly overtop Rarity and Twilight. "Eh, might as well see what's up." Her wings altered their trajectory and she lazily spiraled downwards to meet them. "How long has it been, anyway?" Twilight asked. "About an hour, now. The movie should be halfway done..." "Mornin'," Rainbow greeted when she got close enough. "Hey there, Rainbow." "Good morning, darling." The pegasus clapped her wings to her sides and dropped onto all four legs. "What's going on?" "We're just waiting here while Fluttershy and Luna watch a movie," Twilight answered. "Whoa! Did she seriously ask Luna to the movies? I didn't think that mare had it in her!" "It did take just a little bit of prodding, but in the end..." Rainbow grinned at her yellow friend's moxy. "So, what're they seeing?" Rarity's eyes grew large and a huge smile spread across her face. "I've been waiting all morning for somepony to ask me that!" "Really?" Twilight wondered. "Is it important?" "It's very important! Tell me, what do you imagine would happen if poor little Fluttershy had to sit through a frightening movie? Why, she'd need somepony to comfort her, to hold her and keep her safe. If Luna is that pony, then surely we will know after this." Her eyes took on a starry sheen as she imagined her friend, enveloped by soft alicorn wings. The purple mare glanced at her friend askance. "That's eerily manipulative," she noted, to which Rarity just huffed and looked away. "You got them tickets for The Manehattan Mangler, didn't you?" Rainbow asked. "Indeed I did. Quite brilliant, if I do say so myself." The pegasus flopped over backwards and casually rested her head on her hooves. "Eh, I hate to tell you this, Rares, but it's not going to work." "What?!" Rarity exclaimed. "Why wouldn't it?" "It's a good plan and all, but there's just one problem—Fluttershy isn't afraid of scary movies." The expression on the unicorn's face became wooden. "What." "I know, weird, right? I found out a while ago, when I caught her watching The Nightmare on Nightmare Night; she wasn't even trembling. I've made her watch all the scariest flicks I could think of, too, and none of them worked, either. She's officially immune!" Twilight scratched her head in confusion. "Hold on, that doesn't make any sense at all. This is Fluttershy! She refuses to come outside on Nightmare Night because she's scared of the costumes! If a tree falls and nopony is there to hear it, she's still terrified by the sound! Why are scary movies the one exception?" "Don't look at me! You're the scientist, you figure it out!" "Huh." Rarity glanced thoughtfully at the theater. "I suppose we'll just have to hope things work out for the best." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Back inside, Fluttershy hummed quietly while she watched the slashing, stabbing, murdering, and general mangling that the big screen displayed. Nopony would ever have anticipated that their kind, gentle, graceful, timid Fluttershy was capable of gazing upon such a macabre film while maintaining that calm little smile of her's, but here she sat, seemingly enjoying herself. On a whim, she glanced over at Luna, and the smile suddenly disappeared. Where the pegasus was utterly calm, her fellow movie-goer was most definitely not. The princess's face was an ashen-gray as she stared forward, wide-eyed and unblinking. Her legs wouldn't stop shaking, so tense were her muscles. I don't suppose that is a good thing, Fluttershy mused, wondering if Luna would be able to survive until the end. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Look!" Twilight exclaimed an hour later, pointing excitedly at a crowd of ponies that was emerging. "Looks like they're coming out now!" "Hide!" The two accomplices ducked back into their hiding space, remembering to pull Rainbow along with them. The mass of movie-goers dispersed, and still neither Luna nor Fluttershy made an appearance. Finally, just as the three ponies were about to give up and go back to shooting the breeze, the two mares in question appeared, pressed up against each other, just like Rarity originally expected. Well, almost like Rarity originally expected. Instead of being the pony in need of comfort, Fluttershy was the one with her wing over her companion's back. "There, there," she said softly, "it's over now... it wasn't real... don't be afraid... everything's all right." On the other hoof, Luna looked absolutely miserable. She was pale and trembling, and muttered to herself semi-coherently. "No, watch thy blind side... go not into that room... he waits inside, prepared to stab thee... the horror... the horror..." Rainbow tried her hardest to refrain from laughing, but it was a losing battle. "Looks like your plan worked after all, Rares," she said, unable to restrain her quiet snickers and chortles. "And on top of getting them closer to each other, you even managed to traumatize Luna!" "Don't you think that—" Rarity began, but the blue mare cut her off. "Hold on, hold on, I got one more. It looks like you just made Luna," she said, pulling out and donning a pair of sunglasses, "into Fluttershy's 'maim' squeeze." Author's Note YEEEEEEEAAAAAHHH!!! (Extra) Ch 16: In Which Twilight is Pushed Too Far, and Fluttershy Touches a PussyPonyville proper bustled with all manner of activities, just like it did every day. A marketplace, some random game stalls, and other such attractions littered the main square, which served as the most popular destination in town. Into this area trotted a cloaked and hooded pony, behind whom floated a large box. Displayed prominently on the cloak's back was a large, arcane-looking symbol. The pony glanced back and forth, as if in search of something, before choosing a direction and setting off, box close behind. A number of the other ponies glanced at the newcomer in interest, but within a short span of time, the stranger was gone, and all thoughts of disguised travelers were forgotten. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Are you sure you'll be alright?" "I have never felt better!" After leading the shell-shocked Luna away from the movie theater, Fluttershy chose an outdoor café where they could order something to eat. The princess regained cognizance within moments of sitting down and now did her best to pretend like she hadn't been the least bit scared. "But, you're still shaking..." "Nonsense, it must be your imagination." When the pegasus's expression remained doubtful, Luna stepped up her game. "Would the pony who defeated the nigh-unstoppable world-eater dragon be frightened by a mere mangler? Would she who has been through countless campaigns, led armies during thousands of battles, and undergone decades of martial training, have fear of a stallion wearing a hockey mask and wielding a kitchen knife?" "Um... yes." For a few moments, the alicorn stared straight into her friend's eyes, a hard look on her face. Finally, she threw her head back in resignation and sighed. "Fine, maybe I was just the slightest bit anxious." "It's alright, I'm scared of things all the time..." Fluttershy said consolingly. "I don't think I could be brave enough to fight a dragon, although I did lecture one, once." She opened a menu and began to peruse its contents. "What do you want to eat? Rarity said that they serve the best bouquets here." "Is there anything more filling?" "I think so, let me look... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Why aren't we following them anymore? Explain it to me again." Back in Twilight's library, she was subjecting Rarity to a series of grueling questions while Rainbow flipped through some magazines. "Because I've realized that we can only help so much," the unicorn answered. "It's true that Fluttershy needed a little push to get started, but from this point on, she must make do without us." "That's the part I don't get. What's stopping us from helping?" "Just think about it for a bit, dear. If they are truly meant to be together, then things will work out fine with just the two of them, and interference from us would only 'muddle the mixture', as it were." Rainbow looked up from the issue of Fliers Weekly that she had chosen to read. "She's trying to say she doesn't want to screw it up." "Exactly!" Rarity said. "In fact, I fear that I may have already done too much." Twilight stood and went into the kitchen. "I'm sure that's not the case. Everything you've done has been for Fluttershy; your intentions were good, so there's no way your actions will ruin anything for her. Do either of you two want a drink?" "A glass of iced tea would be lovely." "Got anything with bubbles?" The alicorn opened the refrigerator and looked in to see what she could find. "No, but I've got—" "BOO!" shouted Discord's disembodied head from its place next to the mustard. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ To Luna's relief, the conversation had finally been steered away from her reaction to The Manehattan Mangler. I shall have to train myself, so that I can go to more movies without embarrassing myself. "Um, Luna, I've been having a really fun time, so far," Fluttershy said bashfully. For some reason, which the princess couldn't discern, her friend's eyes were fixed downwards on the table. "Thank you for going with me, even though you had a bad experience." "How many times must I tell you, I am perfectly fine!" Luna realized how loudly she was talking and lowered the volume a bit. "And anyway, the only thing that really matters is that we are 'hanging out'. I am enjoying myself as much as you are! See?" She used her hooves to stretch the sides of her mouth up into a goofy-looking smile, earning an appreciative giggle. Why am I acting so silly? she wondered. Only for you, Fluttershy, would I do something like this... "Was it really okay for you to leave the castle?" the pegasus asked. "I mean, being a princess, you probably have a lot to do." Luna glanced back and forth conspiratorially before answering. "One perk of being a ruler is that you can put things off if you so desire." While Fluttershy started a new topic of conversation, the alicorn noticed that, although there were plenty of other ponies at the café, none of them occupied any of the adjacent tables. In fact, the only empty places available were the ones that ringed the table at which Luna sat. They must be avoiding me, she realized. I still have a long way to go, I suppose... "It's alright," the yellow mare said; her words cut right through Luna's thoughts and brought her attention back to their conversation. "You aren't alone; I know how wonderful you really are, and so do your other friends." "Fluttershy..." the princess said, looking away so that nopony could see her eyes tear up. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ This is the part where I should take her hoof, right? Fluttershy thought. She eyed the closest of Luna's forelegs, which rested lightly on the ground. But is it alright for me to do that? I still don't know how she'll react. What if she yanks it away and gets mad? Despite these negative thoughts, the pegasus began to stretch her own hoof forward, slowly reaching... "Look, here come the appetizers!" Luna exclaimed, pulling her hoof out of Fluttershy's range in order to point at the approaching waiter. The yellow mare snatched her leg back before anypony could see what she had been doing. A large plate of fried onion rings was placed in the middle of the table, and Luna's mood brightened immediately. "So this is 'fried food'. What does it taste like?" "Try it and see, I'm sure you'll like it. Um, not that I'm trying to tell you what to do..." It's probably for the best that she moved her hoof... Sighing quietly, she took a ring for herself and began to eat. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "AAAAAAHHHHH!!" Twilight shrieked, leaping back to stand on her hind legs against the wall, forelegs splayed out to either side. "Twilight!" Rarity cried. She and Rainbow rushed over to investigate their friend's outcry. "What happened?!" Discord's head rolled out of the refrigerator and fell to the ground. "HAHAHAHA!" he roared, unable to control himself. "HAHA!" His body appeared and picked the head up, plopping it onto his neck upside-down. "Twilight, are you alright?" The alicorn's chest heaved as she sucked in air, frightened half-to-death; her eyes were as wide as they could possibly be. "Haa, oh, Sparkle, you're too easy!" He released a few more chortles, plainly not caring that his head was still upside-down. "I laughed my head off at that one! Get it? Laughed my head off?" Once more, the dragonequis fell to the ground and lost himself in laughter. Rainbow couldn't help but chuckle. "Heh, that was pretty goo—" she began to say, until Rarity cut her off with a glare. "Er, I mean, how dare you do that to Twi?! Jerk!" Getting to his feet, Discord twisted his head around until it rested at the proper angle and position. "I swear, messing with you ponies never gets..." An aura appeared suddenly behind the dragonequis, one that caused the temperature in the room to plummet. "...old?" He slowly looked behind himself, where Twilight finally managed to peel herself off of the wall. "Discord..." she growled menacingly. Her eyes took on a red tint, and her horn glowed with an ominous light. "N-now, Sparkle, let's not over-react," Discord said, backing away. "It was just a prank! What's a practical joke between friends, eh?" The alicorn wore the most intensely intimidating scowl anypony had ever seen as she ignored his pleading and stalked forward. "You aren't... getting off... so easily," she said, still taking very quick, shallow breaths. His expression devolved into one of resignation, and he stopped trying to escape. "Well... this is probably going to hurt..." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The waiter cleared the last of their plates from the table as Luna leaned back and patted her stomach. "That was a worthy meal..." she said in a sleepy voice. "Y-yeah," Fluttershy agreed, amazed at how much the alicorn had managed to put away. Once more, she glanced at Luna's hoof and contemplated taking it. This is supposed to be a date. Aren't ponies supposed to be intimate on dates? I really should at least try... She slowly reached out, determined to accomplish her goal before the courage fled her. Unfortunately, fate was not on the pegasus's side. "Why hello, Fluttershy!" Neither she nor Luna (who was almost comatose from the amount of food she had eaten) had noticed the hooded pony approach their table. The stranger dropped an unmarked box on the ground. "It's nice to meet you." Fluttershy shrank backwards and retracted her leg as shyness replaced bravery. "Wh-wh-who are you?" she asked quietly. "Ah, right, the hood." She threw the cloth covering back to reveal her face. Her immaculately kept mane curled around her neck, perfectly accentuating her light-purple coat. "Sorry. I'm May Shower, and I just really wanted to meet you. I've heard so many good things..." "Why did you have to 'meet' her right now?" Luna asked. Her eyes narrowed, and she inspected May closely. "I'm sorry, I wasn't talking to you," the unicorn answered. Before the slighted princess could reply, May turned back to Fluttershy. "I didn't know that you would be such a pretty mare, though." "I-I-I-I-" the pegasus stuttered, unused to such a direct compliment from a complete stranger. "And you certainly are cute when you act all shy like that." May brushed against Fluttershy's side and batted her eyes. "Tell me... would you like to see my pussy?" All noise stopped as every customer in the café ceased whatever they were doing and looked in shock at the purple mare. Two tables over, a stallion's nose started to bleed; the mare he sat with noticed this and smacked him on the back of the head. A loud crash resounded through the air when a flabbergasted waiter dropped a plate she carried. As for Fluttershy, her mouth opened and closed repeatedly, but no sounds came forth; she resembled nothing so much as a giant, yellow, winged fish, gasping for air. Even her mind was absolutely blank. "I do not understand," the ever-oblivious Luna said. "Why is everypony staring at us?" "Pu-pu-pu-pu—" Fluttershy managed to get out. "—pussy?!" May nodded enthusiastically. "Yeah, you know, my pu—" Her voice trailed off as she realized her slip. "For hay's sake, I meant my cat! My cat!" She opened the box and levitated a very grumpy, very ragged cat into the air and placed it on the table, where it rolled onto its side and didn't move. "All of you are awful!" Everypony breathed a sigh of relief and went back to their own business. Immediately upon seeing the animal, Fluttershy's apprehension vanished. "Aw, he's so adorable!" She nuzzled the cat lightly; it didn't react in the slightest. "He looks dead," Luna noted. She reached forward and poked the cat in the side, getting absolutely no response. The pegasus turned her attention back May. "Um, I appreciate you coming here, and saying nice things, and showing me your cat, but—" "Fluttershy and I do not have many opportunities to hang out," Luna said, "so we would appreciate having this time to ourselves." Fluttershy threw her friend a surprised glance. Why is she trying to chase May away? "I can join you though, right?" May asked, moving to an empty place without waiting for an answer. Unfortunately for her, she found her way blocked by an alicorn. "We ask that thou leaveth Us be," the princess said. Her eyes took on a dangerous glint. Is... is Luna jealous?! "Fine!" the unicorn snapped. "I didn't want to spend time with either you anyway! Fluttershy, I believe you'll be interested to know that Princess Luna has no interest in you as a friend. She just wants to get you into her bed!" "What?!" Luna bellowed. "What basis dost thou have for—" "We got a look into the specter's mind," May said; a wicked grin appeared on her face. "We know everything that it knows; we know that you have the stupidest crush on this pegasus here." She dropped the cat back into the box and turned to leave. "Well, enjoy the rest of your meal, you two!" The unicorn laughed to herself as she walked off. Once more, everypony in the area had stopped talking and cast their eyes right at Luna and Fluttershy. Even the café staff poked their heads out of the building in order to see what was happening. The princess's expression became panicked as the situation sank in. "Flutershy, I just—" She quickly stood and began to back away. "I didn't—it's not true, We wouldn't think that! Please believe Us! We're friends, I—" Her wings spread and she propelled herself into the air. "Forgive me," was the last thing she said before she was gone. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Ow!" Discord yelped when Twilight rubbed anti-burn cream on an extra-badly burnt spot. "Go easy, please!" "Stop whining, you big foal," she told him. "You only have yourself to blame." "Right, because I was the one who thought it would be a good idea to light Discord on fire," he shot back. "You should both be ashamed of yourselves," Rarity said. "Discord, you nearly gave the poor mare a heart-attack! And Twilight, if I hadn't been able to find your fire extinguisher, you could have burnt the library down!" "Oh, but immolating the dragonequis is fine, is that it?" "I'm giving you first aid, aren't I?" Twilight snapped. "I wouldn't be helping you if I wasn't just a little bit sorry." "You have a funny way of showing it!" The alicorn scowled and squirted more ointment onto the wound. "Ow!" He opened his mouth to say more but was cut off when the door quietly opened and Fluttershy walked in. "Fluttershy!" Rarity said. "How did the rest of your date go?" The pegasus didn't answer, but when she looked up, her eyes shimmered with unshed tears. Before the unicorn knew it, she was bowled over by the now-wailing mare. "That well, huh?" Discord said sarcastically, causing Twilight to jab the burn with her hoof. "OW! You weren't even pretending to be treating me that time!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Because she no longer concealed her features under a hood, nopony paid very much attention to the departing May as she made her way back out of town. A look of doubt was plastered on her face while she thought about what she had just done. "We know everything that it knows; we know that you have the stupidest crush on this pegasus here." The mare remembered the expression that Luna had adopted when May said those words, and despite the fact that her plan was a success, she couldn't find it in her heart to rejoice. Is this really okay? she wondered. Is it— "Very nicely done." May's head shot up to find that one of her stallion unicorn cohorts had joined her. "I saw the whole thing. There's no way the princess walks away from that with a peaceful mind." "Yeah..." The stallion looked at her curiously. "You aren't having second thoughts about this, are you?" "N-no way!" she said, shaking her head. "The past five years have all been in preparation for our master! It'll take more than one depressed pony to shake my resolve!" "Resolve to do what, We wonder?" The ground shook as Luna came crashing down in front of them. "Perhaps thou shouldst inform Us the nature of thy scheme." "We're not scheming anything," the stallion said immediately. May added her own protests. "Yeah, just because you're mad that you won't be getting lucky tonight doesn't mean you can take it out on us." "That is where thou art mistaken," the princess said. "We knew that We recognized that seal upon thy back." Her hoof rose to point at the arcane marking on May's cloak. "It took some time, but We finally remembered. Thou art of the Cult of Dromus." "What makes you say—" "Fine, you caught us." The stallion looked at his mare companion in surprise at her admission. "Thy cult should have dissolved soon after We sealed Dromus away; its continued existence gives Us reason to suspect that thou art planning something dire." "Get ready," May whispered. "What art thou—" "Go!" She threw a red pellet at Luna's feet, where it exploded in a burst of opaque smoke. "You've gotten slow, princess!" "We shall show thee slow!" However, despite Luna's bravado, the smoke made its way into her lungs and she couldn't help but cough. After a few minutes, she managed to get to her feet and escape the cloud, but by then, her quarries were long gone. With a final depressed glance towards both Ponyville and the pegasus she would likely never be able to spend time with again, the princess departed for Canterlot. (Extra) Ch 17: In Which Celestia Makes a Difficult Decision, and Rarity Springs Into Action"A-and then, she just flew away!" Fluttershy said, sniffing loudly and wiping at her eyes. "She pr-probably never wants to see me again!" A fresh wave of tears rolled down her face, and Rarity reached forward to pull the sobbing mare into a tight embrace. "You poor thing..." the unicorn cooed, lightly stroking Fluttershy's mane. "I can't believe that Luna would just leave without saying anything! Being confronted like that..." "A-a-actually, she d-did say something." The pegasus cleared her throat before continuing. "She looked really angry, a-and she denied that she felt anything for me, and she said that we're friends, and that she'd never think of me as anything else!" "Hmm..." Rarity hummed. She raised a hoof to her chin and scratched it. "Rainbow, be a dear and keep Fluttershy company, would you? Twilight, a word, please." She led the alicorn to the other side of the room while Rainbow occupied her distraught friend. "Is something wrong?" Twilight asked. "I mean, besides the obvious." She waved a hoof in Fluttershy's direction, where Discord had moved over to join the two pegasi. "If Fluttershy's account is accurate, then the way Luna reacted doesn't make sense." Rarity beckoned the alicorn closer and lowered her voice so that nopony else could hear her. "If somepony came up to you and accused you of being in love with me, how would you react?" Meanwhile, Rainbow had been given rabbit ears à la Discord, an act that drew a choked giggle from the crying pegasus. "What?!" Twilight exclaimed with a grin at the notion of being romantically attracted to one of her best friends. She released a few chortles before clapping a hoof over her mouth. At the same time, Rainbow glared at the dragonequis when he turned her tail into that of a giant, poofy bunny. A small smile appeared on Fluttershy's muzzle as she tentatively reached out a hoof and batted at one of the blue mare's floppy ears. The alicorn gave her friend a shamed glance. "I'm sorry, Rarity, I didn't mean—" "No, dear, that's good! You're proving my point exactly! That's how I would expect you to react! What I wouldn't expect is for you to flee the scene. In fact, I don't think Fluttershy was correct in saying that Luna was angry; I would bet my mane that she was actually panicking, because this 'May Shower's' accusations were too close to the truth!" "Wait, you think that Luna actually does have a crush on Fluttershy?!" "All signs point to—" "Alright, that's it, buddy!" Rainbow shouted at Discord. Her front teeth had been elongated so that she more closely resembled Angel bunny than a proper pony. "I'm gonna give you some bruises to keep those burns company!" By now, Fluttershy was laughing uncontrollably. "At least somepony is having luck making her feel better," Twilight said. "Let's go tell Fluttershy the good—" "No!" Rarity exclaimed, pulling her friend back. "We can't get her hopes up before we know for certain!" "I suppose it would be a letdown if you turned out to be wrong..." "Well, at least I know how I should proceed. I shall do everything I can to discern Luna's true feelings towards Fluttershy!" "Oof!" Discord slid on his face across the floor with an angry pegasus standing on his back. "Turn 'em back!" she yelled at him. "I don't wanna be a rabbit!" "...Although maybe I should break these two up, first." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Celestia's eyes darted back and forth, uncertain as to which of the two choices would be most proper for a pony of her stature. A line of sweat trickled slowly down her neck while indecisiveness plagued her very being. What should it be? she thought frantically. That would be improper for me to pick; it's not very princess-like, is it? However... As if a switch had been flipped, her face lit up with steely resolve. She lifted a leg and dashed the perspiration away with a single swipe of her hoof. "Very well, I have decided," the white alicorn proclaimed. "These types of choices are not always easy to make, but in the end, a ruler must always do what she thinks is right. Therefore... yes, I would like sprinkles on my sundae." A mischievous smile spread across her muzzle. The chef rolled his eyes at the melodramatic little speech. "Sprinkles on the sundae, understood. Now, what about a cherry on top?" Celestia's expression froze as new, wonderful avenues revealed themselves to her. However, just as she opened her mouth to speak, a loud klaxon alarm belted out its cry, filling the air with ear-splitting wails. A state of emergency? But the only ones who can declare that are myself and Luna! That means... "If you would be so kind, please leave my dessert in the freezer while I take care of some important business." "Of course, princess." The chef snapped off an impressive salute, considering his lack of military training. "Forgive me for the presumption, but I shall take the liberty of applying a cherry." "I knew there was a reason I didn't have you fired!" Celestia called over her shoulder as she cantered from the dining room. "That was a joke, right?" he shouted at the retreating monarch. When she didn't answer, a drop of sweat rolled down his forehead. "Right?" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ With the help of loyal Hamfist, Celestia soon learned that the main source of the commotion was located in the courtyard outside of the guard barracks. She arrived in no time at all to find Luna standing on a pedestal, belting out orders. "Step up patrols in the southern portion of the city!" she shouted, relying on her subordinates to determine who specifically should do what. "Bring Us as much information on obscure cults as the librarian can muster. Investigate the laboratory to see if the specter is still there! Take—" "Ahem." The dark alicorn stopped talking immediately when she saw that her sister had arrived. "Luna, what is the emergency?" "Dear sister, We have discovered the existence of an evil organization that We had thought vanished long ago. Thus, We are taking steps to ensure the safety of Our kingdom." "That does sound dire... however, would you step down from there and take a walk with me?" "...Very well." Within moments, the two alicorns plodded slowly through a garden maze. "Now... what exactly is this cult that you thought destroyed?" "Certainly you will recall the Cult of Dromus, a vile collection of vermin in the service of an even viler monster." "And that monster is..." Luna raised an eyebrow at her sister. "Er, its name is Dromus. Do you not remember?" "It rings a bell..." Celestia said musingly. "But I'm afraid I cannot bring any details to mind." "Dromus is the half-pony demon who, at the peak of his power, nearly toppled the kingdom!" "Sorry, it's not coming to me." "Do you remember the year I was entirely absent from the castle?" Luna asked. "I had to remain in the field to lead our forces against his invasion." "Still nothing." "Dromus is the one who called you, 'Hot-Plot'." Celestia's eyes lit up with divine fury. "HIM!!" "Yes, of course that's the part you remember," the princess of the moon said sarcastically, sighing and smacking a hoof against her forehead. "But, tell me the details of what happened," her sister said. "Weren't you spending the day with Flutt—" "I encountered them in Ponyville," Luna interrupted. "There were two of them, a mare and a stallion, both unicorns. On her back, the mare bore the sign of Dromus." "Is that all that happened?" "Of course not!" The dark alicorn tossed her head indignantly. "She threw a pellet at my feet that encompassed me in a cloud of smoke, preventing me from pursuing them while they escaped." "Well, what were they doing in Ponyville in the first place?" Celestia asked. "And how did you encounter them if you were with Flutter—" Once more, Luna cut her sister off. "I happened to run into them. I know not what their goal was." She's hiding something, the princess of the sun realized. That's the second time she didn't let me finish when I started to mention Fluttershy. "So let me make sure I have this right. You ran into two ponies, one of which had the sign of a centuries-old cult on her clothing." The other alicorn nodded. "And you don't know what they were there for." Another nod. "And they threw a smoke-bomb at you and escaped." Nod. "And there were only two of them." Nod. "Luna, I'm afraid that you may be overreacting." "But—" "It's clear to me that something occurred which upset you," Celestia continued. "Tell me what's wrong; are you alright?" Luna stepped back and fixed her sister with a cold stare. "Nothing is wrong. I am merely fulfilling my responsibilities as a ruler of this land." It's never easy, is it? "Very well, I'll let you keep your secret, but I insist that you call off this state of emergency. There is no concrete evidence that the Cult of Dromus has returned, nor that they are harboring any ill will towards Equestria. All we know is that somepony is walking around with their symbol, nothing more. As things are right now, you will only cause panic in Canterlot." Like a balloon with a hole jabbed into it, the dark princess deflated, and the aura of purpose that she had been giving off dissipated. "Yes, sister..." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Hold on, Angel," Fluttershy said tonelessly while putting together his dinner. "Mommy's almost finished." The rabbit tapped his foot impatiently as his stomach rumbled. "There, all done." She placed the bowl in front of him with far less grace than normal. Looking inside, Angel grimaced at the sight that met him. His usual salad, carefully crafted with the utmost precision, was nowhere to be seen. Instead, he found a sloppy mess of lettuce, tomato, and dressing; she had even forgotten to add the carrots. The bunny almost pushed the meal away in disgust before he remembered that his owner had recently gone through some sort of traumatic event. With a look that said, "The things I put up with for you," he dug in halfheartedly. The pegasus hadn't even waited to see if her Angel was eating before shambling into her sitting room, where Applejack waited. "Sorry to keep you waiting; I'm finished." "Ain't nothin' to 'pologize for," the earth pony replied. "Ah was just stoppin' by to check in, see how things're goin'." "Things are going fine." She sat down and rested her chin on the ground. "No offense, suges, but that wasn't exactly the most convincin' sentence Ah've ever heard." Fluttershy sighed and gave up the pretense of being alright. "You girls shouldn't worry about me; I'm not worth your time." "Now you stop that quitter talk right now!" Applejack scolded. "And Ah ain't gonna just sit around while one of mah best friends is down in the dumps. Ah actually had another reason for comin' by, as well." She paused to give her friend a chance to reply, but continued when no response was forthcoming. "Ah figure some hard work'd be good for ya, help keep yer mind off things. Why don't ya come down tomorrow and let me see what Ah can find for ya to do?" "I'm sorry, Applejack, but if it's okay with you, I'd rather stay here for a while." This immediately raised a red-flag in the orange mare's head. None of her friends would refuse a request to help out at Sweet Apple Acres unless they had a very, very good reason. This's worse than Ah thought... "Alright, well, you know where to find me if'n ya change yer mind. And Ah'm goin' to keep thinkin' of ways to help; Ah really hope ya feel better soon... we all do. We miss our Fluttershy." For the first time, her words seemed to reach the pegasus. "I'll... I'll try," Fluttershy said. "Thank you for thinking about me." After Applejack departed, Fluttershy flopped down on a couch and stared at the ceiling. "Should I try to do something?" she wondered out loud. Her eyes wavered uncertainly while her thoughts whirled. "Sweet Apple Acres," she finally decided. "Maybe, if I get better, I can see her again, after all." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The next morning, Twilight yelped in fright when the library door slammed open without warning. "Twilight!" Rarity exclaimed, galloping in without preamble. "I know how to fix it!" "Wh-what?" the alicorn stuttered, still trying to catch up. "What do you—fix what now?" "I know how to find out what Luna's feelings are!" "Oh. Oh!" Twilight bounced up and down with excitement. "What is it? How do we do it?" "First, I need you to help me do some research." If Rarity had said, "You just won a lifetime supply of candy, money, and books," Twilight wouldn't have been any happier. "Research?! With a friend?! Yay! What are we looking up?" "I need to find some kind of event in Canterlot that involves dresses or fashion, one that preferably is going to occur within the next few days. Do you have a periodical of some kind that would list such items?" "That's easy, the library gets free issues of Canterlot Life every week! We can go through the past two months' worth and see what there is!" With that said, the two mares got themselves drinks and sat down to work. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Luna yawned deeply as she made her way through the castle corridor en route to her mid-day meal with Celestia. She was just about to round a corner when she heard voices. "...act like a ruler." "Yeah, I know what you mean. She's just running around like a little schoolfilly, doing whatever she pleases." The princess poked her head into the intersection and saw two guards, each standing with his back to her. "It's embarrassing, really," one said. "And I heard that she's mooning after some random pegasus in Ponyville, while her sister takes care of all the important work." This accusation had little merit, because Luna had taken on plenty of duties that formerly belonged to Celestia before her sister's return from the moon. Apparently, not every pony knew this. "And what's with that whole 'possession' thing? Kind of like Nightmare Moon all over again." "You're preaching to the choir." A few days ago, Luna would have stepped forth and confronted the two stallions. She would have given them quite a few things to contemplate while they recovered from a lecture of epic proportions. However, the dark princess of the present couldn't muster the willpower to take any kind of direct action. Instead, she turned and walked in the other direction. A third stallion joined the other two, and his words caused her steps to falter. "What do you two think you're doing?" the newcomer said in an angry tone. "J-just talking, sir! We have no other duties assigned us, sir!" "No other duties? I see, I see. I understand, when you get some free time, it's only natural that you'd want to spend it in a leisurely manner, is that it?" "Yes, sir. Exactly, sir!" Luna looked around the corner once more, and her eyes went wide—Hamfist had appeared and now confronted the two other stallions. "Hm, yes, indeed it makes sense." His next words took the relieved smiles off of the unnamed guards' faces. "If you've got free time, then as your superior officer, I should find something for you to do, shouldn't I? Go clean the third floor latrines, if you would." "...Latrines?" "If that's not enough, the second floor's could use a scrubbing as well—" "No, sir, the third floor is more than enough!" Hamfist waved them away, but spoke once more before they left. "Oh, and if I hear either of you speak ill of Princess Luna again, you'll be begging me to let you wash bathrooms for the rest of your careers. Is that understood?" "Yes, sir!" "Understood, sir!" "Now get out of my sight," the senior guard barked. He stood stock still for a second more before leaving to take care of his own duties. A surprisingly-touched Luna tried to make sense of what had happened. Perhaps I've been a bit too hard on the stallion, she thought. However, the positive feeling soon left, and once more, depression reigned supreme. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Terrible!" Rarity cried dramatically, throwing another magazine aside. "We've been through nearly half a year's worth of material, and there is nothing good at all!" "Well, the further back we go, the less chance we'll find any mention of anything useful to us." Twilight turned a page and ran her seasoned eyes over the text. "I know that, but still." With a sigh, the unicorn rolled onto her back. "The soonest thing I could find is a conference on casual-wear in two months. Have you still not found anything?" "...No," was her friend's answer. "You paused!" Rarity said. "You clearly paused! You did find something, didn't you? Don't hold out on me, Twilight, what is it?" "Well, umm..." Twilight coughed nervously. "It's true that there is an event involving fashion... kind of." "When is it?" "Two weeks from tomorrow. But... I dont think you're going to like it." "Nonsense," the white mare scoffed. "Is it stallions' fashion? I admit that I'm a bit inexperienced in that, but this is for a friend; I will make do." "No, it's not stallions' fashion." Twilight's face showed clear apprehension. "I really don't think you're going to like it. Like, really really really not going to like it." "If it helps Fluttershy, then I must simply grin and bear it. Now, please tell me what you've found." Instead of speaking, the alicorn opened a magazine and slid it over for Rarity to look at. The unicorn stared at the page for a full minute before she looked back up, expression blank. "You have got to be kidding." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Hooded ponies threw themselves aside in order to stay out of the path of a dour May Shower as she trotted purposefully down the corridor. Her expression promised swift retribution to anypony who needlessly held her up. Why am I in such a bad mood? she wondered. Her eye twitched in irritation with herself. Ever since I split up Luna and that pegasus, I've felt like... "Gah!" she shouted out loud, causing a nearby stallion to flinch. She finally arrived at an unassuming wooden door and, without waiting, pushed her way inside. A young unicorn stallion sat at a desk, intensely focused on drawing something. "Sir, why aren't we doing anything?" May demanded angrily. "The princess is in a slump, we might not get a better chance than this!" "Kidnapping an alicorn is going to take more than that," the stallion mumbled. "Go away, I'm busy." "If we need to do more, then why don't we?" she asked. "Just lazing around like this isn't getting us any closer to our lord!" "Are you deaf?" he said, looking up for the first time. His horn flared, and a giant, green hand appeared and pushed May out the door. "I said I'm busy." The door slammed shut in her face. The mare stood, shaking nervously from the force of the magic that had just been used on her. He really is our secret weapon... she thought. I couldn't have done anything to stop him if I wanted to. "Fine. If things go poorly, it's your head," she said to the closed door, before turning and stomping off indignantly. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Luna was moping on her bed when a puff of green smoke heralded the arrival of a letter from Twilight; she was so out-of-sorts that she almost didn't open it. The mare unrolled the scroll and began to read, soon realizing that the note wasn't from Twilight after all. Dear Princess Luna, I would like to offer my sympathies to you. We heard what happened, and it must have been an awful ordeal to go through. If you need anything, anything at all, know that we are your friends, and will do whatever is necessary to cheer you up. On a different note, I am planning on visiting Canterlot two weeks from tomorrow in order to attend a certain event that is taking place at the Tri-Mane Convention Center. I mention this because I was wondering if I could spend a day with you while I'm in town. Also, would you be able to recommend a place where I could find accomodations for a few nights? Again, we all sincerely hope that you feel better, and I hope to see you in two weeks. Sincerely, Rarity "Tri-Mane Convention Center..." Luna mused out loud. "Is that not a two-minute walk from the castle gates?" "That is correct." Celestia entered the room, closing the door behind her. "Sister, is there any royal protocol that prevents a princess from having a 'sleepover'?" "A sleepover?" the white alicorn asked; her expression showed genuine surprise. "I-it should be okay..." "Very well! I shall invite Rarity to stay here!" For the first time in days, Luna's face was split by a wide smile. Suddenly, she recalled a specific passage from the letter. ...in order to attend a certain event. "Celly, you have knowledge of the happenings in Canterlot, do you not?" "I do, because of all the petitions that are brought before me in court," Celestia replied. "Is there something happening that you wish to know about?" "Yes. What event is taking place at the Tri-Mane Convention Center in two weeks?" "Wait, wait... are you planning on attending that?" "Perhaps I am. Rarity is going, after all, and it could be fun." When her sister began to snicker, the lunar princess gave her a confused look. "What do you find so humorous?" "I hope you can find somepony to make you a costume, Luna, because it seems like you're going to be attending a comic book convention." Author's Note Wah waaaaaaah. So that's why Rarity didn't like it. (Extra) Interlude: In Which Discord Helps in the Most Annoying Way Possible(Extra) Interlude: In Which Discord Helps in the Most Annoying Way Possible "Hmmm..." A pencil, held in a firm grip by Twilight's purple magic, scribbled wildly on a piece of scrap parchment. She turned her gaze back to the area upon which she was experimenting. "It's missing something..." A flash of inspiration lit the alicorn's eyes, and a second spell conjured a wall of fire. She lobbed an apple through the hot field, causing it to catch fire and burn up almost immediately. "No, that's no good." She released an exasperated breath and dropped her head sideways onto the table. "Shoot, how am I going to do this?" An obvious solution presented itself to her, but Twilight stubbornly brushed it off. From upstairs, a voice called out. "Hellooo, anypony home?" "Down here!" the princess shouted back without looking up; the door to the basement opened, and Rarity hopped daintily down the stairs to join her friend. "Good morning!" the unicorn said. "How are yo—" "No, I can't go to Super-Con with you," Twilight said immediately. "Aw, why not? Don't make me go by myself!" "It's on Spike's birthday. If I missed it, he'd be devastated..." Rarity sighed sadly. "That is a noble excuse... Very well, just this once, I shall allow it." "No wonder they call you the Element of Generosity," was Twilight's sarcastic response. "I think I need to get out of here, my brain's beginning to fry. Would you like to see if there's anything Fluttershy wants to do with us?" "Dear Fluttershy is, in fact, already occupied," the unicorn said. "Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash took her to an amusement park in an effort to cheer her up." "Well, how about just you and me? We could get something to eat." "I'm afraid that I, too, have a full schedule. I need to start designing... costumes... for this abominable convention." Her lip curled in apparent disgust. "I'm sure it won't be that bad; I know plenty of awesome ponies who go to those things. I'd be more than happy to go with you if I wasn't already busy. To be honest, I've kinda wanted to attend one all my life." "Is that so..." Rarity's gaze drifted around the room, and she realized that it was messier than normal. "And what are you doing today, that has begun to 'fry your brain'?" "Oh, nothing," Twilight said. Her evasive answer immediately piqued her friend's interest. "Just a stupid experiment, it's not important." "Well, what are the details? Do tell." "You wouldn't understand..." When Rarity stared at her beseechingly, Twilight sighed and gave in. "Alright, fine. It's an experiment that tests the effects of chaos on magic." Please don't say it, please don't say it, please don't say it... "Oooh ho, I see. Does this have anything to do with a certain dragonequis?" Darn it. The alicorn set about cleaning up the mess she had made. "Ever since he used magic from myself and the other princesses to enchant that stupid frying-pan, I've been curious about it. He took pure magical power from four ponies, and somehow shaped it into something completely different. I want to know how he did it, and if there are other applications for this technique." "Forgive me for assuming, but it doesn't seem like your efforts are meeting with much success." "I can't figure out how to make things chaotic enough! I've tried heating, I've tried temporal tampering, I've even tried pleading! Nothing works!" A sly grin appeared on Rarity's face. "Have you tried asking Discord himself?" "Wh-wha-what?! No way! Absolutely not! I'll never ask that idiot for help!" "Methinks the mare doth protest too much..." A blush crept across Twilight's cheeks. "What are you suggesting?" "Oh, nothing... nothing." The unicorn walked to the steps. "I must take my leave, or else I shall never make any headway on these... costumes..." Once again, her lip curled. "But before I leave, might I suggest you swallow your pride and ask Discord for help?" "I already told you—" "If you're a true scientist, you'll be able to set aside your feelings towards him, and focus on the experiment." "But I don't even have any feel—" "Ta-ta! Have a good afternoon!" The door closed behind her as Rarity showed herself out, leaving Twilight alone with her conflicted thoughts. She's right, that this would be much easier with Discord's help... But what guaruntees that he'd want to help? He'd probably just make things more difficult, with his attitude. But isn't it worth trying, for the sake of science? Gaah, what do I do?! Suddenly, inspiration hit. "I got it!" The alicorn grabbed a quill and parchment and began to write a letter. Dear Celestia, I am currently conducting an experiment on the nature of chaos and how it affects a pony's magic. However, I have run into a wall when it comes to creating the actual chaos. If he is available, would you see if Discord is willing to lend a hoof? If he cooperates, his help would most certainly speed things along. Thank you, and I hope you are having a great day! Your Friend, Twilight Sparkle "Ha, there!" she crowed upon the note's completion. There's no way Discord will agree to do this! He'll say 'no', and I'll be able to relax, knowing that I tried! Perfect! She trotted upstairs to find Spike so that he could send the letter on its way. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "I'm pleased you decided to join me today," Celestia said to her sister. The two alicorns sat side-by-side in the throne room while holding court. "I needed to stretch my legs," Luna mumbled. "Regardless, I don't get to spend as much time with you as I want, so I'll take any excuse I can get." A sudden burst of smoke appeared, and a tightly-bound scroll dropped to the ground in front of the princess, who wasted no time in opening and reading it. "What does Twilight Sparkle have to say?" the dark alicorn asked tonelessly. "She wants... Discord's help?!" Celestia said, eyes widening with confusion. "I... I guess I'll tell him about this. Let me fetch a guard..." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Back in the library, a bored Twilight paged through a dictionary while Spike idly doodled. Every five seconds or so, she would glance at the clock before turning back to her reading. After approximately two hours of repeating this behavior, she slammed the book shut and clambored to her hooves. "Ha, I knew it. He's not coming after all!" "What are you talking about? I've been here for about an hour, now." Twilight's head snapped back and she looked up to find that an upside-down arm chair, in which Discord sat while casually sipping some kind of exotic beverage, was stuck to the ceiling. "An hour?! Why the hay didn't you say anything?! I've been just lazing around here, doing nothing while I waited for you to show up!" "Where's the fun in making things easy for you?" He dropped out of the chair and deployed a parachute, allowing him to float safely to the ground. "So why did you decide to actually show up? Is it just to make fun of me?" "Sparkle, as much as I enjoy getting on your nerves, that's not enough to make me willingly spend time with you. I'm only here because Celestia told me to, and arguing with her is one of the most irritating things I can think of." Twilight sighed and made a mental note to sarcastically thank the princess. "Whatever, let's just get this over with, then." She walked to the basement door and went down the stairs, beckoning to the dragonequis to follow. "I'm coming too!" Spike said eagerly. He darted after the alicorn and passed her, almost tripping her up. "This outta be good." Twilight laughed at his enthusiasm. "That's fine, but you have to promise to stay back; this could get dangerous." "What're you doing anyway?" the little dragon asked. While she answered the question, Discord stood behind her and mimed her actions in an exaggerated fashion. "I have decided to research—" When Spike began to chuckle at the dragonequis, Twilight whipped around to look at the source of the humor, only to find him leaning casually against a wall while he examined his fingernails. She slowly turned back to Spike, and as soon as she did, the mimicking resumed. "I want to learn about the reaction that occurs when a pony's raw magical essence passes through a stable field of pure entropic energy ." "Uuuhhh..." The dragon scratched his head in confusion. "You wanna run that by me again?" Before she could repeat herself, Discord spoke up. "She wants to shoot magic through chaos-y stuff to see what happens." "Ooh, I see, and you're the 'chaos-y stuff'." The dragonequis snorted. "Unfortunately." "If you two are finished, we have work to get done before next month," Twilight said. "See what I have to put up with?" he complained. "Fine, what does Her Highness wish for this lowly subject to do?" The alicorn ignored the sarcasm and pulled out a square, glass box with one missing side. "This is a cube that I've magically reinforced so that it can withstand any amount of stress. Your job is to apply a chaotic field over the opening—" "That little thing?" he scoffed, pointing at the container. "You've gotta be kidding me. If we're gonna do this, we're gonna do this right." He snapped his fingers, and the box tripled in size and warped into a cylinder. Twilight found herself pressed up against a wall by the giant-sized apparatus. "How did you do that?!" she demanded. "And why does it need to be this big?!" "It should really be another five times bigger than it is now. However, for a reason that I truly cannot fathom, I didn't want to squash you, so I made the sacrifice. Did you really think that your tiny little cube would be large enough to contain the results of your experiment?" "You could've said something first!" With a *pop*, Twilight extracted herself from her entrapped position. "And why is it a cylinder? What's wrong with the cube?" "...I like circles more than squares," Discord admitted, poking the ends of his forefingers together bashfully. "Don't judge me!" "Yeah, because that's the weirdest thing about you." She sighed, and turned to face the open-end of the container. "Are you going to put up the field or not?" "Somepony's feeling cranky. For your information, I already applied my magic; you're the one holding us up, Miss Prickle-Puss." Calm down, Twilight, she thought, taking a deep breath. Don't let him get to you; you're better than this. A forced smile appeared on her face. "Thank you." The pencil made a few quick notes, and then everything was ready. "I'm now going to perform the first trial. Wish me luck!" "Good luck, Twi!" Spike cheered. "I'll put out the fires," Discord added, earning a glare. A spark of purple light buzzed from Twilight's horn and slowly drifted towards the cylinder. A pony, a dragon, and a dragonequis watched intently as it passed the threshold, where hopefully something benign would occur. They needn't have worried too much—as soon as the magic entered the cylinder, it emitted a loud *pop* and turned into a duck. "Discord!" the alicorn snapped. "This isn't the time to be messing around!" "I don't know what you're talking about. You wanted to see what happens? That's what happens." Meanwhile, the duck had changed into a pastry. "Really?" She wrote furiously for a few seconds before turning back to the 'subject', which was now a pair of chopsticks. "It seems like... it converts energy into matter?" She glanced in the dragonequis's direction questioningly. "Psh, don't look at me, it's not like I know what you'll get when you mix something with chaos. That's half the fun!" "Gee, how helpful." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ An hour later, a pony passing by the library heard angry voices coming from within. "Can't you just be serious, for once in your life?!" "Can't you just relax, for once in your life?!" "I would relax, if you would cooperate so that we could get this stupid thing done!" "And how far would you be without me here, huh?" "Probably further than I am now! You've done nothing but slow this whole process down!" "Don't think I wouldn't rather be somewhere else. If Celestia hadn't made me agree to help—" "You keep saying that! 'Celestia made me do this', and 'Celestia told me to do that'; well, I'm as unhappy as you are that she forced you into doing this!" The voices faded as the two combatants lapsed into silence. "Sheesh, lovers' quarrels," the walking pony said, shaking his head before continuing on his way. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Phew." Twilight exhaled heavily and wiped a trickle of sweat from her face. "We're getting there..." They had been at it for four hours, and her notes had grown into an impressively large stack. "Can I go home now?" Discord asked without looking up from the comic he was absorbed in. "If you really want to go, then go," she snapped at him. "Hmmm... tempting, but if I went back before you were done, I'd never hear the end of it. Oh well..." Then why did you even bother asking? "I'm going to go get a drink, can I trust you by yourself down here?" "Don't weave me awone, mommy!" the dragonequis said in mock-terror. "I'm scawed of the dawk!" "Whatever... I'll be right back." Upstairs, Twilight poured herself a glass of lemonade and took a sip; a grateful smile spread across her face. She walked back out into the main room where a soft cushion awaited her royal posterior. One quick levitation spell later saw a plate of chocolate cookies at her side. What a stressful day... the alicorn thought; she took a large bite of cookie and grunted in satisfaction. What did Celestia think she was doing, making that pest come all the way over here? She knows I can't stand him, so why? Maybe he was getting on her nerves, and she just wanted him out of the castle... Yeah, that's probably it. A breeze wafted through an open window and caressed Twilight's cheeks; her eyes closed as she relished the cooling sensation. It was a peaceful day in Ponyville, due in part to the absence of Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie, two of the most boisterous ponies in town. However, even without them, the village was unusually quiet. Yes, it really is quiet today... Her eyes widened when realization dawned upon her. "Too quiet. DISCORD!" The princess darted back down into the basement, but paused when her eyes met a most unwelcome sight. Dozens of pieces of parchment, each one folded origami-style to resemble some type of animal, fought each other in a battle royale. While she looked on, paper was ripped to shreds, and one even burst into flames (how a paper swan accomplished this, Twilight would never know). Meanwhile, Discord sat on a throne and loomed over the entire spectacle, a huge smile on his face as he cheered on a specific combatant. "Yes, Bruce! Get 'em! That's it, tear him to pieces! Ye—no! NO! BRUUUCE!" He put a hand over his chest. "I'll never forget you, brave Bruce. Fare thee well—" "Discord." Twilight's quiet voice cut through all of the noise, and all of the surviving parchment-animals and the dragonequis himself looked in her direction. "What is all of this?" "Well, you were gone for such a long time, I got bored—" "I've been upstairs for three minutes, tops! Paper isn't cheap, you know! You'd better be willing to replace all of this!" "Yeah, yeah, if you say so." "Let's... let's just get back to work." The alicorn trotted over to her desk to peruse her notes in order to find where they had left off. "Okay, next on the agenda is—wait a minute." The wooden surface was disturbingly bare of anything that even resembled the data she had written down. "Where are my notes?" "Aha, about that... you see, I ran out of paper, and I simply had to have three hundred fighters for the origami melee, of course, so I—" "You're telling me that these shredded pieces of paper on the floor are the remnants of all of my efforts from the past few hours." I'm dreaming right now. That's what this is; it's a nightmare, and I'm going to wake up and be very, very happy that none of this ever happened. "Wow, you catch on quick! Celestia always says you're the smartest, but you've really outdone yourself this—uh, Sparkle?" Twilight's eyes rolled up and she collapsed in a heap on the floor. "You're still alive, right?" She didn't react. "I'll just, uh, take that as a 'yes'." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Ugh..." Twilight groaned as a lance of pain shot through her skull. "Where..." Her eyes opened and she found herself staring at her bedroom ceiling. "Why am I here..." Then, it all came back to her. The arguing, the fighting, the teasing, the pranking, the mocking, and, most of all, the destruction of her research... all of these things swirled through her thoughts, propelling the alicorn into an increasingly destructive rage. Her breathing quickened as her vision began to turn red. "No, I have to calm down." She took a deep breath and counted to ten before releasing it, but found that her fury had not abated. "A letter. I'll write a letter to Princess Celestia about this. I'll be ready to face... him... after that." Five minutes later, Twilight read over the finished product in order to make certain that it was acceptable to send. Dear Celestia, Sorry for writing to you for the second time today, but I need to get some things out of my system, and I can't think of anypony else who would be willing to listen. All day, Discord has been grating on my nerves. Apparently, it's his life goal to see how close he can push me to the edge without actually making me want to light him on fire. I was coping until the very end, when he destroyed the papers that contained all of the data from the research I had gathered while painstakingly enduring his presence. Needless to say, I find this behavior to be unacceptable, and I plan on sending him back to the castle as soon as I finish writing this letter. I actually kind of wish that you hadn't forced him to come here to help me out. Please don't take that as a criticism of your judgement, I'm just complaining here in order to calm down. Anyway, thank you for putting up with my poor mood, and I hope that your day is far better than mine. Your Friend, Twilight Sparkle The alicorn rolled up and sealed the letter before leaving her bedroom. "Twi!" said Spike, who had been waiting right outside. "Are you feeling any better?" "Would you send this to Princess Celestia for me?" she asked, ignoring his question. "I'm going to go have a... talk... with our guest." "Um, sure thing, Twi." A puff of green fire saw the note on its way to Canterlot. Twilight stomped down the stairs into the library proper to find Discord floating in mid-air while rolling a coin over his knuckles. As soon as he noticed her, the dragonequis dropped to his feet. "Finally! I was wondering when you were going to—" "You are leaving." She poked a hoof into his chest. "Right now. All day, you have done nothing but whine at me, make fun of me, mess with my head, hinder my progress, and worst of all, ruin my work." "How kind of—" "I'm not finished yet." His jaw snapped shut. "I didn't even want you to come here today. In fact, you were supposed to say no and refuse! I told the princess that it was a mistake forcing you to come here, so we can both rest assured, knowing that there will be no repeat of this incident. Now, get out, and I never want to see you in this library ever again." The room was utterly silent for a few seconds; neither Discord nor Spike (who had heard the entire tirade) dared speak, so intense was the frown on Twilight's face. Finally, the dragonequis snorted humorlessly and raised a hand in the air. "Just what I wanted to hear. See ya later." He snapped his fingers and vanished from sight. As soon as he was gone, Twilight released the breath she hadn't realized she had been holding, and all of the tension went out of her. She felt suddenly tired, as if the rant had taken all of her energy. "Wasn't that a bit... harsh?" Spike asked tentatively. "It needed to be said. I mean, I put a lot of work into those notes! To just destroy them like that..." "Well yeah, but..." The little dragon fiddled with his tail. "He did redo them for you..." "...He what?!" "I mean, I helped a bit, but Discord did most of the work. Here, take a look." Spike handed her a stack of paper that had been sitting on a nearby table. Twilight flipped through the parchment quickly, intent on finding any mistakes. Instead, she found that her data had been almost perfectly replicated; he had even finished the research for her, saving what would have likely been another five hours of work. Except for some goofy drawings spread throughout the pages (an example of which was a cross-eyed Twilight along with a speech-bubble that read, "Durr, I are teh dumbest"), the quality of the notes could be considered on-par with her own. "Spike," she said slowly, "why did he do this?" "I dunno, but—hurk—" He was interrupted by a monumental belch, and a scroll appeared in a burst of green smoke and fire. "—ugh, I hate when she does that when I'm talking!" The alicorn didn't even hear him, so absorbed was she in the letter. She unrolled it and quickly scanned the contents. Dear Twilight, I am sorry to hear that you are having such a horrible day. I shall be certain to speak with Discord about it when he returns; however, there is something that bothers me about the letter you just sent to me. You write that I "forced him to come here to help [you] out", but in actuality, I did no such thing. In fact, the details of your letter were barely out of my mouth before he left, saying something along the lines of, "that pony can't do anything by herself, can she?" I do not know all of the details of your conflict, but I hope that you can resolve it peacefully. Perhaps this letter will assist you in coming to a truce with him, but the choice is ultimately yours. Your Friend, Celestia "Ugh, I feel like such an idiot." Twilight smacked a hoof against her forehead. "What's wrong now?" ""Spike, I've made a really big mistake," she admitted. "I need to hurry and find Discord!" She darted to the door, but was stopped by her assistant's voice. "How do you know he's around here?" the dragon asked. "Can't he teleport, like, anywhere he wants?" "I have a feeling he didn't go too far." The alicorn hesitated and threw him a concerned glance. "Will you be alright while I'm gone?" "Yeah yeah, do whatcha need to do, I'll be fine." "Thanks, Spike, I'll be back soon!" The door slammed behind her, leaving the little dragon by himself. "Heh heh," he said with a chuckle, "and now Spike gets to raid the freezer." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Stupid stupid stupid, Twilight thought as she scanned the town from the air. That's why I should never lose my temper! If Celestia never actually told him to help me, then that means he's here because he wanted to be! Suddenly, she saw an apple tree in Applejack's orchard shimmer and waver before becoming totally solid once more. That's what I've been waiting for. The princess descended and approached the tree cautiously. Up close, its boughs looked as leaf-y and real as any other, but she knew better. "Discord," she said tentatively, "I want to talk to you." There was no response. "C'mon, I know you're there; I saw your illusion spell cycle from above." A few seconds passed, then the dragonequis's voice rumbled out. "Go away, Sparkle, I'm not in the mood for pointless banter right now." "I just want to apo—" His head shot out of the tree and stopped inches from her own; the normally dancing eyes were most certainly not as jovial as usual, and a snarl rippled on his lips. "I SAID GO AWAY!" he roared in her face. The standoff lasted for a few uncomfortable moments before Twilight backed away. "Alright..." she said, tears already building in her eyes. "I'm sorry." The mare turned and shambled off. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Psh, good riddance," Discord muttered as he watched Twilight depart. "Go to help a pony, and what do you get? Told that you're not wanted, that's what! I'm better off without that nonsense." He reached out and grabbed an apple, but it vanished from his grasp. "Ah, right, illusion." His gaze turned back to the retreating alicorn. Suddenly, he began to repeatedly smack the sides of his head. "No! I won't apologize! I am the lord of chaos and entropy, I don't do apologies!" A stifled sob reached his ears, and he realized that Twilight was actually crying over their fight. "Oh, for pete's... I'm soft. That''s it, I've gone soft; it's all over now. My reputation is kaput." With a snap of his fingers, the non-existent tree disappeared, and his serpentine body snaked through the air. Twilight yelped in surprise when the dragonequis landed in front of her without warning. "Alright, Sparkle, listen up and listen good; this is the only time you will ever hear me say this, so commit it to memory. You got that?" She nodded mutely. "I'm...s-s—" He let out a strangled, choking noise. "Ah, makes me want to gag... I'm s-s-s...sorry." All hints of sadness dropped from the mare's expression; in fact, all hints of anything dropped from her expression. "What." "You heard me!" he snapped. "I shouldn't have yelled back there. And I shouldn't have destroyed your research. Happy?" "I— I—what?!" "There, I said it. Now I'm going back to Canterlot, where I will no doubt encounter Her Majesty Princess Celestia so that she can give me the lecture of my life. Blah." He turned and made to leave, but a hoof on his back halted him. "It's... I want to apologize, too," Twilight said quietly. "Those things I said before, they were cruel, and unnecessary. Spike showed me the notes that you took while I was unconscious, and—" She seemed to be about to mention something else, but must have decided against it at the last second. "—and another thing happened, that showed me that I overreacted." "Hmm, Twilight Sparkle is saying she's sorry," Discord said, crossing his arms. "Too bad I forgot my recorder; this is the type of moment that should be immortalized." "Just shut up and accept the apology." "Alright fine, apology accepted. It's not like you can do anything to upset me, anyway." The two stood there awkwardly, not saying anything, until Twilight broke the silence. "Um, I have some other experiments I could use some help with... if you want to." "What?! More work?" The dragonequis groaned loudly. "Do you do anything else?" "Stop complaining, nopony's making you—" "Whatever, but next time we do what I want." The alicorn turned and began the long walk back home while Discord floated through the air above her head. "I get the feeling I wouldn't like anything that you find fun," she said. "Always with the insults," he lamented. "I'll have you know, I am a lover of poker, a very respectable game that many other ponies also enjoy." "Gambling's terrible! Why would you want to risk losing money based on chance?!" "And that, dear Sparkle, is why cheating was invented..." Their argument faded with the waning sunlight as they made their way back. Author's Note BONUS STORY! Don't ever let me hear that I'm not good to you, unless I do something that's not good to you, in which case feel free to say that I'm not good to you. Or not, whatever floats your boat.
Foreword, by Princess CelestiaGreetings, dear reader and loyal subject. It was with great pleasure that I accepted when asked to write the foreword to this wonderful work. It is a joy for me to contribute to the success of any pony, and as I count the author as one of my dearest friends, I very much believe that—Okay, my advisers have informed me that nopony ever reads past the first two lines of these things, so if you're still with me, congratulations—you get to read the real foreword. Being a princess can really grind on your nerves; it's just one PR moment after another. It's all smiles, and grace, and kind words, and tolerance, and sometimes I get so bored I want to drill my horn into a wall. However, since that would both take time to do and ruin a perfectly good wall (not to mention probably hurt, quite a bit), I'm going to instead take the opportunity to vent through this, one of the most passive-aggressive mediums available to me. First of all, do you know how much the author is paying me to write this foreword? Twenty bits! Twenty! Not two hundred, not two thousand—twenty. That's a two followed by a single zero! I know that artists are normally strapped for funds, but for pony's sake, come on! Twenty bits can barely get you a good hooficure these days! Trust me, our kingdom could really use a bit of pocket change right now. Do you know what Equestria's tax laws are? Of course you don't, because we don't have any. Zippo. Zilch. Living here is duty-free! Hooray! The one source of income we have is through doing little side-jobs, like writing forewords for ungrateful, twenty-bit-paying authors. The only reason our government isn't completely broke right now is because I have Twilight Sparkle and her friends to take care of the big problems—it really saves money, and she does it for free, every time. I'm actually starting to feel a little bad about it, now that I mention it. Anyway, my point is, the author—what a jerk, am I right? Secondly—and here I'm going to be blunt—I personally think this work is awful. When I accepted this job, the publisher sent me a manuscript that I could read as a "preparation". Ha! What a joke—nothing could prepare me for what was contained within those pages. Now, I'll be fair—I've heard of "shipping" and I've seen a few examples of what it can produce, and some of them are just disgusting. Like, bleach-your-eyeballs-to-cleanse-them levels of disgusting. This one isn't, and for that, I must be thankful. You know, credit where credit is due. However, the rest of this horrendous, so-called "story" is melodramatic, poorly written, grammatically unsound, devoid of characterization, and all manner of simply terrible things. It's like a laundry list of all the awful atrocities that would happen if King Sombra had been born as an irate editor with a grudge against the world of literature. If I had ever written something this miserable, I would have burned it immediately upon completion, and then I would have summoned a priest to exorcise whatever demon would have inevitably spawned from the ashes. I would even kiss Discord before I allowed a story like this to see the light of day. By the way, if you tell Discord that I wrote that, I will personally hunt you down and end you (and probably loot your wallet, as well—remember, Equestria's poorer than a diamond dog in the desert). And Discord, if you're reading this, no, that is not an invitation. I'm serious. Bring this up at your own risk. You have been warned. Thirdly and finally, I really have to question the author's source of information. I'm not going to spoil anything important (not that it really matters, it's pretty "spoiled" already, if you get my drift), but Luna is presented as more powerful than I am, in terms of raw magical- and physical- strength. To that I must say—what a load of crock! I mean, sure, she could probably take me if she's having a good day, but it would be pretty darn close. And it's not like I've been spending the last couple centuries embroiled in warfare—things have been pretty peaceful, so of course I'm going to be a little out of shape! Send me to the moon for a thousand years and let me toughen myself up with a time-skip and a training montage, and I'll kick some epic flank when I get back, too. Right now, Luna's reading this over my shoulder while I write it, and even she's nodding her head in agreement with me. Unfortunately, I think she's also starting to get some ideas that I don't care for—she keeps flexing her muscles and throwing me challenging glances out of the corner of her eye. I might have to take her out to the training yard and show her that the whole "Chrysalis beating me" thing was a fluke—you know, just so that her head doesn't get too big. For the sake of any readers who have made it this far and would like all of my points to be presented in an easy-to-read list format (you know who you are, but mostly I'm looking at you, Twilight), here they are: I am being underpaid in an almost-criminal fashion I could sneeze on a piece of blank paper, and it would be a better story than this one The author is either very deluded or really, really dumb Anyway, I'm currently being told that, every now and then, the editor will read the last sentence of a foreword, just to make sure that it's not sarcastically critical of the proceeding work, so I'll have to end the real thing right here. Thank you all so very much for reading this fantastic piece of literature, and I hope that you enjoy it greatly—I know I did! Yours Sincerely, Princess Celestia
Ch 1: In Which Luna Kicks Flank, Fluttershy Enjoys Life, and Twilight SchemesCh 1: In Which Luna Kicks Flank, Fluttershy Enjoys Life, and Twilight Schemes "Um, Luna, I don't feel totally comfortable with this..." "Nonsense! This is but a fun little spar! There shall be no lasting harm done." At those words, Twilight Sparkle, one of the alicorn princesses of Equestria, raised her eyebrows. "No lasting harm?! What do you mean by no lasting—" "Have at thee!" The other alicorn present, Princess Luna, smiled widely as she pushed off the ground in a single, mighty leap and cast a spell with practiced ease. She took aim at her opponent and released from her horn a tiny spark that grew larger and larger as it traveled. By the time it reached its target, the spark had become a boulder-sized ball of energy. Twilight yelped and teleported herself out of harm's way a mere instant before the spell struck the ground and detonated. Both mares were blinded by the explosion, and when their eyesight returned to them, there was a giant crater where just moments before Twilight had stood. "Luna!" she said, voice shaky. "Do you have any understanding of the concept of 'self restraint'?" "I know not of what thou speakest," the princess of the night replied. "Dost thou claim thyself to be unfit to proceed?" "Not exactly, but—" "Then we continue!" Luna lunged forward, horn leading the way. With a deft twist of her head, Twilight's own horn deflected the attack, and she took the opportunity to retreat while casting an enchantment that left a slick puddle of grease in her wake. Luna wasn't tricked, however, and so instead of charging and losing her footing on the slippery surface, she chose to take to the skies. "Why are we doing this again?!" Twilight shouted as she dodged a bolt of conjured lightning. A second bolt was blocked by a magically-summoned shield. "Thou seekest a reason to engage in friendly combat?" the darker mare asked. "'Tis not enough to desire to test thyself against a worthy adversary?" "I prefer my tests to be less... dangerous, I guess?" The younger princess sighed and shook her head. "Whatever, if this is the way you want it..." Her horn lit up and she sent a wave of magical arrows arcing towards her opponent. Luna gracefully spun through the air, avoiding every last one of the projectiles. The princess of the night summoned a gigantic, purple, glowing hammer in front of her, and swung it downwards; Twilight's eyes grew wide as the monstrous mallet descended. She only barely managed to conjure another magical shield in time to avoid being flattened. "Luna..." she grunted through gritted teeth, straining against the weapon that bashed repeatedly against her barrier. "How...much... longer...do...I...have...to...do...this?!" "Oh, very well," Luna snapped. She reached up a hoof and flicked her horn, and the hammer disappeared instantly. Twilight released a pent-up breath. "Thank you!" she gasped as she wiped a bead of sweat from her brow. "I don't think...*pant*... don't think I'm the right... *wheeze*... right pony for this." A disappointed expression crossed the dark princess's face. "We suppose We were a bit... hasty... in arranging this duel." She sighed while she looked Twilight over for any injury. "Art thou in good health? I did not inflict any dire injury upon thy body, did I?" "I'm fine, don't worry," Twilight said, waving the princess's concern away. "Just a bit... tired. Also, um... you're talking in the old-style again." "I beg thy—your—I beg your forgiveness." The purple alicorn used her magic to levitate some water from one of the garden's ponds, and began to sip it daintily. "If you want to get exercise so badly, why not arrange for a few of the guards to spar with you?" "The guards still fear Nightmare Moon enough that they would refuse such a request." "Surely there must be somepony who would be a more appropriate opponent than me!" Luna turned away to hide her somber expression. "Twilight, thou art—shoot, I mean, you are the only pony that I could ask. That is, I don't have any other..." "'Any other' what?" The dark alicorn muttered something inaudibly. "Sorry, could you say that again?" Twilight asked. "I don't have any other friends!" Luna said in an embarrassed tone. "Aside from Celestia—who absolutely hates this sort of thing—you're the only pony to truly reach out to me!" She sniffed and wiped her eyes. "Oh, Luna, I'm so sorry," Twilight said, placing a hoof on the other mare's shoulder. "I didn't mean to make you cry—" "I'm not crying! I am a warrior, and warriors do not cry!" "But there are tears—" "It's sweat! You see sweat!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ An hour later, Twilight was flying home to her library in Ponyville, thinking hard on the state in which she had left Luna. That poor mare, after all this time I'm still the only one besides her sister who will spend time with her... She tilted herself to the side in order to dodge a goose that wasn't paying any attention to where it was going. "Honk!" it honked in honk-like apology. I wonder if there's anything I can do to help her out. I bet the girls will give me a hoof with this—I'm sure they'll be happy to help. Well, except for maybe Fluttershy— she's probably still terrified of Luna. Dang, this isn't going to be easy. A plan began to form in the purple mare's mind, one that would hopefully accomplish the task of finally getting Luna some new friends. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Go on! You can do it! I believe in you!" Fluttershy stood in her kitchen, watching while Angel Bunny gripped a tiny barbell. He flexed his muscles and pulled as hard as he could. "Almost there! Go, Angel, go!" she cheered. With what appeared to be a monumental effort, the bunny lifted the weight proudly over his head. "Yay!" Angel dropped it to the ground, where it landed with a barely audible *thud*, before he flexed once more and kissed his biceps. "Alright, Angel, go wash up and I'll prepare a nice lunch for mommy's big, strong bunny." He scowled at her and tried to hide a blush before hopping away to soak in his pint-sized bath tub. The pegasus hummed a cheery tune while she got started on the task of making her favorite animal's favorite meal (although if she was asked, she would most certainly say that all animals were her favorite). "Ah..." she said. "Bright sunlight, perfect temperature, and all my friends..." If every day was like this... I think that would be wonderful. A hoof pounding on her front door frightened Fluttershy from her thoughts. The ruckus continued until she opened the entryway and peeked around the edge. "Wh-who's th—oh, Twilight?" The purple alicorn was running in place, wings spread and a frantic look on her face. "What can I—" "No time!" Twilight exclaimed. "My place! Meet! Thirty minutes! Thanks a lot, see you then!" With that, she was gone, galloping away as quickly as her legs could take her. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "...so that's basically, it," Twilight concluded. "She's really really really lonely, and I can't just leave things the way they are! I have to do something about this!" "Wait, that's just stupid," Rainbow Dash said after a moment of thought. "She's a princess! Can't she just, like, order somepony to be her friend?" "Use your noggin for once. Ya should know that ain't how it works." Applejack turned her glare from the brash pegasus. "But Twi, Ah don't get what ya want us to do. Ah mean, the rest of us barely even know the mare." "Isn't that exactly the point Twilight's trying to make?" Rarity asked. "The poor thing doesn't have any friends, and it's all because nopony has truly gotten to know her!" "Yep, Rarity's absolutely right!" The unicorn beamed at Twilight's confirmation. "And I know that if you girls spend some time with the princess, you'll like her just as much as I do!" "Oh, fine," Applejack groaned. "What do ya need me to do?" Twilight pulled out a calendar and held it up for the other mares to see. "Right before you all got here, I invited her over for the evening to have some girl-time," she said with a grin. "I just need you all to be here!" The look that Rainbow gave her was decidedly wooden. "Let me get this straight. You invited us over here now, so that you could invite us over here tonight." "Well when you say it like that, it sounds stupid, but...c'mon, what do you say? Will you do it?" Applejack immediately shook her head. "Sorry, no can do. Big Mac and Granny Smith are goin' out, and Ah need to be at the farm to take care of Apple Bloom and her friends. Ah'd bring them here, but that probably ain't the best idea... Ah don't think you want to drive the princess nuts." "And I've got a bit too much on my plate this evening," Rarity added. "I apologize, but I must also decline. In the future, however, I would be more than happy to help." "And Pinkie's out doing... something..." Twilight said. "Who knows what she's up to... Rainbow, Fluttershy, I can count on you two, right?" Her eyes were almost pleading. "When you say 'girl-time', you mean mane-braiding, and gossiping, and stuff like that?" Rainbow asked, causing the alicorn to nod hopefully. "Nope, that's not my scene." With that, she was out the window in a flash. All eyes settled on Fluttershy, who had been sitting silently, as per usual, listening in on the conversation. And so we get to the pony who least wants to do this. "Fluttershy, please," Twilight begged; she dropped to her belly and grabbed the pegasus's legs. "You're my last hope!" "B-b-but isn't she l-loud and sc-sc-scary?" Fluttershy asked, trembling at the mere thought of the lunar princess and their last encounter. "I d-don't think I can..." Her voice trailed off when Twilight's eyes grew large and watery while her lower lip trembled. It was enough to break somepony's heart. "My my, you've been practicing your puppy-dog expression," Rarity commented. "I can see my lessons haven't gone to—" "Rarity," the purple mare said flatly as the moment fell apart. "C'mon, Fluttershy, she's a good, honest pony. And she's not really that loud anymore! I promise, it's getting better!" The pegasus didn't appear to be convinced, and Twilight's face fell. "Alright... I'm sorry to have pressured you. I'll send her a letter to let her know not to come..." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ That poor pony's going to be very disappointed, a voice said in Fluttershy's head. It sounded suspiciously like Iron Will, the minotaur that had once had a hand in teaching her to be more assertive. But... I'm certain she doesn't want to spend time with me—not with stupid, scared Fluttershy! The yellow mare grimaced inwardly at the words she used to describe herself. Twilight had picked up a quill and parchment and was busy scribbling a note. You never know until you try. Plus, you could be her second friend! The second friend she has in the whole world! Fluttershy watched as Twilight finished the letter and began to roll it up. But I'll probably mess things up, and make her feel worse than she did before... Don't be so negative! Who's the nicest pegasus in all of Equestria? ... I SAID 'WHO'S THE NICEST PEGASUS IN ALL OF EQUESTRIA'? ...I am? Is that a mosquito I hear, buzzing in my ear? SPEAK UP! I'm the nicest pegasus in all of Equestria! C'MON, PANSY! TELL THE WORLD WHO THE NICEST PEGASUS IS! "I AM!" Fluttershy yelled, using her indoors-voice. F*yay!* YEAH YOU ARE! "Fluttershy?" Twilight asked, just about to place the letter into Spike's clawed grip so that he could send it to Canterlot. "Did you say something?" "Oh." The pegasus coughed delicately. "Uh, yes. Twilight, I'll definitely be there tonight!" Her sudden courage immediately fled and she cringed backwards. "If that's alright with you, I mean..." "Yay!" the alicorn cheered, throwing the letter away and leaping forward to hug her friend. "Thank you thank you thank you thank you! The princess will be so happy! I promise, you won't regret this!"
Ch 2: In Which Luna Frets and Fluttershy Goes Temporarily InsaneCh 2: In Which Luna Frets and Fluttershy Goes Temporarily Insane I am immediately regretting this, Fluttershy thought later that day as she tried to sort out what she should do to prepare for an evening with a princess. "That's silly," she said to nopony in particular. "I don't need to be worried at all! I'm around Twilight all the time, and she's a princess." That's true, but you knew her before she was a princess, too, her mind responded. "Well, yes, but—" And you don't even know Princess Luna in the first place. "That doesn't—" And aren't you supposed to be terrified of loud, scary things? "I don't see why—" Fluttershy realized what she was doing. "I'm having an argument with a voice in my head. Does that mean something's wrong with me?" The answer is probably 'yes'. "Oh hush, I wasn't asking you...I'm sorry, that was so rude of me..." Angel Bunny, who had been watching all of this, rolled his eyes at the clearly insane pegasus. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Ahem." Luna cleared her throat and puffed her chest out. "'Hello, dear friends'—no, that's terrible." She scrunched up the page she was reading from and tossed it to the side, where a pile of similar paper balls accumulated. A quill and fresh parchment floated up in front of her, and she wrote a new greeting to test out. "'Oh my, how nice to see you all again!' ...Bah! Too insincere." Over her shoulder went the page, soon replaced by another. "'Are you all here for me? You didn't have to do that!' ...No no no NO!" The last was shouted in the Royal Canterlot voice, causing a nearby mirror to be shattered. The princess hung her head and sighed. She had spent all day getting ready for that evening, but no matter what she did, she only succeeded in making herself feel more and more nervous. "If only my opponent was a foul ogre," she grumbled. "Oh ho, then I would be fine! But no, instead I have to survive an evening with other ponies!" Luna glanced over at the brownies that she had received from the palace kitchens. Earlier, she had tried her own hoof at baking, but the results had been less than successful. A chef, covered head-to-hoof in the remnants of Luna's version of 'chocolate cake' after the inevitable explosion, had politely but firmly (and even the socially-impaired princess could see that he was seething with anger and irritation) told her to leave the food to him. She began to pace back and forth across the room. "A pox upon cooking! And a pox upon baked goods—" A sudden idea caused her to halt momentarily. "Hmm... perhaps I shall ask for instruction from Twilight Sparkle on how to cook..." Little did she know that Twilight's own baking had become the stuff of legends. Terrifying legends, meant to be cautionary tales for aspiring chefs. A fanfare of trumpets interrupted Luna's frenzied steps, followed by the doors to her suite slamming open. "Her Majesty, Princess Celestia!" announced the guard who had entered (Without knocking, Luna noted with a scowl). "Hamfist, how many times must I tell you?" the alicorn in question scolded as she moved past the guard. "You must seek a pony's permission to enter before barging through their doors!" "Of course, Princess! My apologies, Princess!" The zealous expression Hamfist wore told everypony that he was anything but sorry. At a gesture from Celestia, he backed out of the room and closed the door behind him. "'Hamfist'?" Luna asked primly. "Thou hast a guard named 'Hamfist'? Do tell, is his second-in-command's name 'Turkeycock'—" "How good to see you, Luna!" Celestia interrupted with a nervous laugh. After a moment's pause, she added, "You know, it really isn't proper to mock a pony's name." "Meh. For as long as he continues to defy Our privacy, so too shall he remain a fair target for Our witty jibes and jests!" "I suppose I can't argue with that." The white alicorn looked around, taking note of the pile of discarded parchment. "Anyway, I'm only here to see you before you go to Ponyville! Are you looking forward to it?" "Dear sister, do griffons drink their victory wine from the skulls of their fallen enemies?" Luna asked, receiving only a blank stare in reply. "Erm, that is... yes, We are—I am—greatly anticipating it. Although We—confound it, I—am beginning to feel jittery." Celestia nudged her sister lightly. "I'm here to listen if you need to talk about it." "Sister, I..." The dark princess swallowed, and cleared her throat. "Up until now, I have spent nearly all of my efforts on once more becoming a capable ruler. However, that has left very little time to spend with... you know..." "Normal ponies?" "Precisely! In fact, the only normal pony that isn't terrified of me is Twilight Sparkle!" A realization hit Luna right as she finished that sentence. "But I suppose that she is no longer a normal pony herself... That means that, for every one of my subjects, I am naught but a specter of terror and nightmare!" "Luna, that's—" "In fact, it is certain that the other Elements of Harmony will know only fear in my presence! Very well, I have decided. I shall write Twilight Sparkle and tell her that I cannot come tonight! No, sister, do not try to change my mind; I shan't be budged!" "Luna." Celestia's firm voice carried a tone that said she would brook no argument. "Luna, that couldn't be further from the truth." "Truly?" the dark alicorn said, her eyes shining. "You mean, my mere proximity won't set mortals aquiver in fear?" "'Shan't be budged', eh? I'm certain that if you relax and just be yourself, nopony will be anything other than happy to be near you." Without warning, she found herself wrapped in a tight embrace. "Tia, your words never fail to lighten my mood," Luna said. "Just... make sure you don't do that thing with the storm clouds." "Storm clouds?" "And try not to shoot any lightning." "I wouldn't dream of it!" "And no shouting. Even if something surprises you!" "Sister, you wound me by even suggesting such a thing!" "And if I even hear a rumor that you've burnt down another renaissance faire—" "One time! That was one time! And I said I was sorry!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Ok, so we've got snacks, games, drinks, cushions... am I missing anything?" Twilight turned to face her dragon assistant, Spike, who was going over her checklist. "You haven't gotten any ice cream yet," he stated with a sage-like nod. "Wah, you're right! I'll go and—wait a minute." She frowned at him. "I didn't put that on the list." "Pfft..." the dragon snickered. "You're almost too easy to tease." I should talk to Rainbow and Pinkie about the things they're teaching him, the alicorn thought. Out loud, she said, "Well hardy har har. C'mon, Mr. Prankster, help me clean this place up a bit." Just as she was moving a particularly heavy textbook, a soft knock came from the door. "I'm on it," Spike said dutifully, opening the door to reveal a timid-looking Fluttershy. "H-h-h-h-h-hi, Spike." Her legs were shaking so badly that her knees knocked against each other. "H-hi, Twilight.." "Hey, are you alright?" Twilight asked, concern etched across her face. "You're trembling, and your face looks really pale." Now that she was inside, out of the fading sunlight, the pegasus seemed to find a bit of comfort. "Um, I-I-I'm f-fine," she stuttered. "P-pr-probably." "Are you really that scared of Princess Luna?" "Well, um, maybe a bit. Kinda. Yes." The last word was said as a barely audible squeak. "Oh, Fluttershy..." Twilight sat next to her friend. "I'm sorry. You know I hate to put you in situations that make you uncomfortable, but this is really important. Do you know what it's like to not have friends?" "I... yes." "Then you can understand how Luna feels right now, correct? If the other girls could have made it, then I wouldn't put this kind of pressure on you, but you are, at this moment, the only pony who can help! So... what do you say?" Fluttershy, who appeared to have been emotionally moved by the description of Luna's plight, put on a brave face and nodded. "I'll do it!" she said with what in other ponies would be called trepidation, but in her was tantamount to courage. "No matter what happens, I won't hide or be scared of her, not even once!" It was right at that moment that the door blew open. Lightning flashed through the windows, accompanying a voice both deep and dire. "Greetings! It is I, Luna!"
Ch 3: In Which Fluttershy Quakes, and Luna is Terrible at Naming ConstellationsCh 3: In Which Fluttershy Quakes, and Luna is Terrible at Naming Constellations The flight from Canterlot to Ponyville only took a few minutes for Luna, a fact for which she was grateful. She knew that her mind would wander while in transit, and if the voyage was long enough, her doubts would eventually re-manifest themselves. Before she departed, she had divested herself of her royal accoutrements; even her tiara was left behind in favor of a more modest appearance, which would ideally put others at ease in her presence. Plus, those crystal slippers are murder on my hooves, the alicorn thought with a smirk. As soon as she touched down outside the library, however, her prior misgivings returned in full force. Over the course of ten minutes, the princess went through a repeating set of actions, in which she would walk to the door, almost knock, then lose her nerve and back away. Why are you being such a coward, Luna? she wondered. You are one of the mightiest beings in existence! There is nothing to be afraid of! The sound of hoofsteps reached her ears, and before Luna's mind could react, her body launched itself up to hide amongst the tree branches. Down below, a yellow pegasus approached the library, trepidation clear in her every step. Oh, it's her—Fluttershy, from Nightmare Night, the princess realized with a start. She felt a stab of sympathy for the poor mare, who was clearly plagued by nigh-crippling fear, but not even that was enough to bring the concealed alicorn out of her hiding place. The library door opened, allowing the pegasus entry; as soon as the coast was clear, Luna dropped back to the ground. Ok, enough of this! I shall just knock, Twilight will let me inside, and we shall all have a fun evening. Ready, Luna? Ready. Alright. She exhaled heavily. The princess was just about to tap her hoof against the wooden portal when the instinct to flee-or-fight took her by the back of the neck. It was a knee-jerk reaction (literally) when, instead of knocking on the door, she kicked it open. Some little voice in the back of her head repeated Celestia's warnings against doing things that might intimidate other ponies, but at this point it was too late. Luna had fully entered 'princess mode', and nothing she could do could stop it. Black storm clouds formed behind her, making everypony in the general vicinity aware of her terrible majesty, and as bolts of magical lightning lit up the sky, she sucked in a breath and spoke. "Greetings! It is I, Luna!" The dragon that lived with Twilight had been standing too close to her when she unleashed her voice, and the concussive force behind Luna's words sent him tumbling across the room. "Hahaha!" he chuckled when he came to a stop, upside down, against the opposite wall. "That was awesome!" "I have come bearing a gift!" she continued, brandishing the food she had brought with her. "Behold—brownies!" "P-Princess Luna!" Twilight shouted with a hoof over each ear. "Too—loud!" Luna immediately shrank back in embarrassment. "Sorry," she said. "Ouch, that smarts," the purple mare muttered, rubbing the side of her head. "It's fine, Luna, I'm just glad you could make it!" "Thank you for the invitation." Luna levitated the brownies over to the table where the other food was arranged. "Am I early?" "No, you're right on time. There was just a little problem. I... kinda didn't check beforehand to see if my other friends were available, and everypony except Fluttershy already had plans. I'm sorry..." "There's nothing to apologize for," the dark alicorn said. "I look forward to properly meeting Fluttershy! Pray tell, where is she?" "What do you mean? She's right..." Twilight turned to gesture at her pegasus friend only to find an empty, pony-less space beside her. "...here? Fluttershy!" The last was said loudly, but Fluttershy didn't answer. "Huh. I wonder where she went." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "No matter what happens, I won't hide or be scared of her, not even once!" These words echoed through Fluttershy's mind as she sat inside an empty cupboard. Hiding. Scared out of her little mind. A pony of my word, that's me, she thought. I can't even be brave for a few seconds... She could hear Twilight calling her name, but the little pegasus couldn't muster the courage needed to respond. Then, hoofsteps sounded right outside of her hole, and she noticed, too late, that the end of her tail was sticking out of the door. Oh, ponyfeathers... Bright light hit her eyes as the door opened to reveal a large, dark-blue pony looking back in. "Aha, I found her!" Luna cried. Fluttershy let out a quiet 'eek' and tried her hardest to shrink into the wood around her. "There you are," Twilight said, trotting over. "Fluttershy, come on out and meet Luna!" The pegasus shook her head quickly, and the young princess sighed before dragging the stubborn mare out with a levitation spell. When she was plopped onto the floor, Fluttershy's legs began to shake and her eyelids clamped shut. After a minute of silence, Luna looked over at Twilight, who shrugged. "Fluttershy, you remember Princess Luna, right?" The pegasus opened one eye tentatively before giving another 'eek' and closing it once more. "What's the matt—" "Twilight Sparkle, I'm going to step outside. I would... like some fresh air." The princess walked off slowly, hooves dragging on the ground. As soon as Luna was outside and out of sight, Fluttershy visibly relaxed. "Seriously, what's wrong?" Twilight asked. "I... just... she's a..." "She's a what?" "She's a princess!" Fluttershy blurted out. "It's—it's—princesses are scary!" "Wh...what?!" Twilight said. "I'm a princess too! Am I scary?" "No," came the immediate response. "You're, um, different. You're still the same Twilight as before." "What about Princess Celestia? I've never seen you shy away from her." "That's because she acts like my mother." "So the only problem is that Luna just-so-happens to be a princess?" Fluttershy began to play with the end of her mane. "Well, I... um..." "When she comes back in here, do you think you could try to see her as just another pony?" Twilight asked. "I'll... I'll try," the pegasus said. "Thanks. I'm going to go check on her; I don't like the way she looked when she walked out." She seemed so depressed, thought Fluttershy of Luna, watching her friend close the door behind her. Is it because of me? Gathering all of her courage, the yellow mare forced herself to follow. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I was right to have expected this, Luna thought from her place on a nearby hill. I should not have gotten my hopes up. The sun had disappeared over the horizon, allowing the heavens to open up and reveal their celestial bounty. The princess's horn lit briefly, and she enacted the spell that would set the moon on its course across the night sky. On a whim, she also painted a few streaks of red and blue across the starry canvas, then nodded in apparent satisfaction. "What are you doing up here?" said Twilight. Luna didn't bother to turn her head to look at the approaching alicorn. "Twilight, I fear that this was a mistake," the dark princess said. "The distance between my subjects and me is too vast to be overcome." "That can't be true—" "I truly do appreciate the effort you have put in on my behalf. However, in the future, I believe I shall stick to matters of state—" "Oh my!" gasped a voice from behind them. Both mares turned to regard the newcomer and found Fluttershy, standing just a few feet away with her head tilted upwards. "The sky is so beautiful tonight!" "Thank you," Luna mumbled. "Um... you're welcome?" Fluttershy said, glancing at Twilight. "Why are you thanking me?" "Because that was a kind compliment," Luna replied, which just served to confuse the pegasus more. Fortunately, Twilight correctly guessed the misunderstanding. "Those are Luna's stars," she said. "She puts them up there. Not just the moon, but all of the night sky is her domain." "You mean—" Fluttershy's eyes widened. "All of that—just one single pony did that?" She sat down heavily, mouth hanging open. "My favorites are the constellations," Twilight said, walking over to point at the sky for the pegasus's benefit. "See, that's Taurus, and there's Cancer, and that's—" "Forgive my interruption, but those names are not entirely correct." Luna, too, directed her gaze upward, her somber expression wiped away by one of bliss. "What do you mean?" the other princess asked. "Apparently, the astronomers within the past three centuries decided that they did not care for my method of nomenclature, and thus thought to give new names to my constellations." Luna's horn lit up, and the stars that formed constellations became brighter so that they could be more easily discerned. "That one's real name is actually 'Stupid-Looking Crab Thing'. And that one's 'Luna Kicking a Minotaur'. Oh, and there's one of my favorites... I call it 'Terrifying Monster of the Morning'." "'Terrifying Monster of the Morning'?" Twilight repeated. "What the hay are you talking about?" "Let's just say that my sister is not a 'morning pony'." "I don't... wait, you mean Princess Celestia?!" Luna nodded. "You've clearly never seen her right after she's rolled out of bed." "What are some of the other names?" Fluttershy asked. "Let me see... Do you see that one there?" the princess said, waving at one in particular. "Yup." "Very well. See if you can guess what it truly is depicting." "Well, the current name is 'The King and Queen', so..." Twilight tapped her chin. "Could they actually be siblings?" Luna smiled and shook her head. "Parent and child." Another shake. "Ugh, don't worry, I'll get it—" "Um..." Fluttershy said quietly, "I know what it is." "Wait, seriously?" Twilight exclaimed. "Y-yes. It's, um... I don't want to say." "C'mon, don't leave me hanging!" "I can't..." "Pleeeease?" "I..." The pegasus could no longer hold out. "It's... well, it's two ponies... doing... things..." "Things?" "You know, um, um, naughty... things..." Fluttershy developed a blush so deeply red, it was a wonder that she had any blood left for the rest of her body. "Naughty...?" Twilight mused, not quite understanding. Then, it clicked. "Wait wait, there's no way that's it! Luna wouldn't—" "Yes! Yes yes yes!!" The sudden exclamation from the dark princess caused the other two mares to jump. They looked at Luna to find her doing an impromptu victory dance. "Cadance told me that nopony would ever guess it right! Ha, that'll show her! That's why I'm the Princess of the Night, not her!" "Luna!" Twilight screeched. "Why would you put something like that up there?! Do you realize how inappropriate that is?!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ While Twilight unsuccessfully berated Luna (who had just started to do her 'moon-walk'), Fluttershy had a realization. This odd pony standing before her might be a princess with an intimidating amount of power, but she was still a pony all the same. Luna had likes and dislikes, qualities both good and bad, a sense of humor, and the ability to give things terrible names. Right at that moment, Luna had become nothing more than a fellow mare. Fluttershy normally didn't enjoy crude humor, but the idea of such a raunchy scene depicted in the sky, put there by a princess of Equestria no less, for some reason tickled the yellow mare's funny bone. She began to giggle. "Fluttershy!" Twilight said, turning to her friend. "Don't laugh! It'll just encourage her!" "We are sorry, We cannot hear thee over the sound of thy jealousy," Luna taunted, deliberately slipping back into the archaic dialect. "Who would be jealous of—oh, I give up. When you two decide to act your respective ages, I'll be at the library." With that, she gave an indignant 'hmph!' and walked smartly back to her tree. "I hope I did not offend her too badly," the dark princess said, trotting over to stand by Fluttershy. Now that she had seen Luna in a more casual light, the pegasus felt nothing more than her usual fear of interacting with a pony she didn't know well. "If you did, all you need to do is apologize," she said. "Friends forgive each other for things like that." Luna nodded, comforted by the reassuring words. For a few minutes, the two mares talked further about the night sky. Luna demonstrated some of the ways she could shape it to her liking, drawing appreciative 'oooh's and 'aaah's from her audience of one. Finally, the air grew cold enough to force them back inside. "Um, Luna..." Fluttershy said during the walk back, "I'm sorry..." "Sorry for what?" "For the way I acted earlier... I was so scared of Luna the princess that I completely ignored both Luna the mare and her feelings..." The princess nudged the other pony lightly. "You said it earlier—'friends forgive each other for things like that', right? So... that is, if I can call you my friend..." "I would like that—" Fluttershy was cut off when Luna pulled her into an embrace that was more akin to a bear-hug. "Huzzah!" she cried. "I have made a second friend! Thank you, dear Fluttershy, thank you thank you thank you!" "Can't—" the pegasus gasped, her face going purple, "—breath!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Once Fluttershy recovered from Luna's chokehold, and after they met back up with Twilight, the rest of the evening passed in a blur. They played games, enjoyed snacks and tea, ("Behold, Twilight, for I have mastered the art of not breaking tea cups! No more styrofoam for this princess!"), and chatted until long past Spike had gone to bed. Twilight envied the ease with which the other two mares now interacted. It seemed like a dam had been broken and both were now rushing to make up for the time that they had missed spending together. In fact, they were so intent on their conversation that Twilight began to feel a bit like a fifth wheel. The young alicorn didn't resent it, however—she was overwhelmingly happy that they had become friends. Unfortunately, all good things must come to an end, and all-too-soon the clock struck midnight. Walking outside, Luna bade her friends farewell and took to the air to return to Canterlot. As she watched the dark-blue pony fade into the night, Fluttershy felt a strange sense of loss building up inside of her. I must be getting tired... I just met the mare, after all. I can't be missing her already... ...can I? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Luna, on the other hoof, hadn't felt so energized since the years before her stint as Nightmare Moon. I did it! she thought. I did it I did it! A new friend! I wonder what types of things she will want to do in the future. How shall I go about approaching her about it? Hmmm... Perhaps Celestia or Twilight will know. For the rest of the night, and the next few days as well, the dark princess could hardly think of anything else.
Ch 4: In Which Rarity Makes a Decision, and Discord Trolls HardCh 4: In Which Rarity Makes a Decision, and Discord Trolls Hard It was a completely exhausted Celestia that collapsed into her bed a week later. The day had been filled to the brim with appointments, activities, and other assorted items that had required her participation. Many of her advisers believed that much of that work fell beneath her, and should be left to those of 'lesser importance', but the princess ignored them. Despite the fatigue that accompanied her at the end of each day, there was a certain satisfaction that she felt in taking such an active role in her country's governance. It certainly beats lazing around on a throne all day, she thought with a grin. The alicorn snuggled into her soft pillows happily, relishing the way they shaped themselves to her form. Her horn glowed and a levitation spell draped a large quilt over her prone body. Unfortunately, just as she fell into slumber, something tapped her on the forehead. Celestia's eyes cracked open and immediately locked onto the grinning face of the being that was, all at once, the most helpful and troublesome creature she knew. "WHAAAH!" she screamed in surprise, trying to leap up but only managing to get caught in the blankets. She rolled off the side of the bed and landed with a loud *thump*. "Is this a bad time?" Discord asked in mock concern. "I could come back later... perhaps when you're bathing?" "And here I had hoped to end the day on a good note," Celestia said sarcastically. "What do you want?" The dragonequis slapped his hands over his heart, feigning emotional injury. "Celestia, you wound me! Here I am, lending you my invaluable assistance, and all you can think to do is insult me?" "Discord. What—do—you—want?" "Sheesh, fine. Somepony got off on the wrong side of the bed..." He snickered, pointedly glancing at the princess still lying on the ground. "I'm just here, as per our prior agreement, to inform you of the success of my foray into the griffon territories." That's right, she realized as her mind fully woke up. I asked him to go there. And this isn't something he can report to any of my subjects. "Very well," she said in the most dignified tone she could muster (considering she was still tangled up in her quilt and sheets). "What are the details?" "The candidate that you favored won the crown, of course, likely due to the competition being... otherwise occupied." Discord leaped into a conjured hammock and a glass of lemonade appeared in his hand. "Really, Celestia, I never suspected that you would be the type to sabotage something like a royal election." "It isn't like I wanted to interfere," she protested. "Strom was the only candidate who I was certain would favor continued peace with Equestria; making sure he won was something that I had to do!" "You mean it was something that I had to do," he reminded her. "'Credit where credit is due' and all that." "Very well." The princess gave an exaggerated sigh. "Discord, on behalf of all Equestrians, I would like to—" "Pfft. I hope you're planning on giving me something more substantial than a 'Good boy, Discord, now run along and stay out of mommy's way!' First (and most regrettable) of all, you're not my mommy. And second of all—" "Fine," she snapped. "What would you consider an appropriate reward for your service?" "Ooo, I thought you'd never ask!" A puff of smoke forced Celestia to close her eyes and cough. As soon as she got herself back under control, she found that she had been dressed up like Santa Claus (beard and all) and that Discord now sat in her lap. "This year, for Hearth's Warming, I want—" he began, only to be shoved off by an irate alicorn. "I'm serious, Discord, I'm very tired, and not at all in the mood for your games." "You're no fun..." With a snap of his fingers, the red hat and coat disappeared, leaving only the fake beard behind. The princess shook it off, earning a disappointed 'aaaw'. "I want a break. You've had me back and forth across the map for the past three months, and as much as I enjoy travelling, it's getting to be a bit... wearisome." "That's it? That's all you want?" "What, do I need to beg?" Now I'm really curious. "Perhaps. Where do you plan on taking this 'break'?" "Well, first I'm going to visit a friend," Discord answered. "Then I'm going to take some good-old down time, kick back at the beach, you know, same-old same-old." "I suppose that's reasonable enough. Very well, consider yourself on leave." "If I'm feeling charitable enough, perhaps I'll bring you back a souvenir. Or something. Probably not. Toodles!" He waggled his fingers at her and vanished. Visit a friend? the princess thought. He doesn't have any friends, who's—Oh. Suddenly, she realized who the dragonequis had meant. "Twilight's not going to like this." Then, with a shrug that said, "oh well, not my problem," she hopped back into bed and within seconds was sound asleep. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The sound of a rooster's crowing floated distantly through the air, signaling that the sun had risen and that anypony still asleep was a lazy bum. Fluttershy's eyes cracked open and she sat up in her bed. After a hoof was lifted to wipe her eyes, she stretched all four of her limbs to their limits. "Another sleepless night," she muttered. "Maybe I'll just stay here for a bit longer..." An hour later, the pegasus had finally gotten around to making herself some breakfast—her normal blend of oatmeal with a touch of brown sugar. However, the taste was blander than she was used to. She added more sugar and ate a spoonful, cringing at how sweet it had become. The ruined dish was pushed away and soon forgotten. What's wrong with me? Her bleary gaze wandered over the walls while her mind wandered. I was so happy a week ago...what changed? Fluttershy had just gathered the effort needed to go for a walk when there was a knock on the door. She walked over and pulled it open. "Good morning, dear!" said Rarity with a dazzling smile. "How are—why, Fluttershy! You look awful!" "Do I?" the yellow mare asked, looking at her reflection in a nearby window. "My apologies, that didn't come out how I meant it," her friend amended. "What I mean is you look like you haven't gotten any sleep! You have bags under your eyes! And your mane, you haven't been taking care of it! Is something the matter?" Yes, but I don't know what it is... "Don't worry about me," Fluttershy said out loud. "It's nothing important." "Now, Fluttershy. You know I cannot simply let this go! I'm your friend, after all! You can tell me anything!" "I suppose talking can't hurt... Oh, where are my manners? Please come in, sit down!" Within a few minutes, the two mares were seated in the sitting room with a cup of warm tea each. "Alright, dear, what's bothering you?" Rarity asked. "I... I don't know," the pegasus answered. "I'm just... there's something wrong, but I... oh, I'm no good, am I? You're wasting your time on me—" "That is nonsense, and you know it," the white mare said. She put a comforting foreleg around her friend's shoulders. "If you don't know what the problem is, then we'll figure it out together! Alright?" "I... I guess..." A small smile lit up Fluttershy's face. "See, you're already feeling a little bit better!" "I guess I am... Ever since you got here, I've cheered up a little." Rarity took a dainty sip of her beverage. "Could it be that you're feeling lonely?" "That's—no, I can't be!" the yellow pony declared vehemently (well, relatively vehemently). "I've—I've got Angel here, and all of my animal friends, and—and—" "That's true, but—and I truly mean no offense to your woodland companions—they cannot interact with you as another pony could." "What do you mean?" "Well, they cannot have conversation, for one thing," Rarity stated. "I know that you love them dearly, but it will always be the love for one's children, not a friend." "But..." Memories of the past few days flashed through Fluttershy's mind. Feeding her chickens, preparing her dinner, getting into bed, playing with Angel... all of those times, she had been surrounded by all manner of little critters. Squirrels, chipmunks, rabbits, birds, they had all been there. But despite their presence, she hadn't felt any better. Not like how I feel with somepony else here. "I think I understand what you mean." "Good! We're making progress!" The unicorn clapped her hooves together. "Well, if I'm right and your problem is loneliness, then I have the perfect solution!" Why do I get the feeling that I'm not going to enjoy this? "We are going to find you a stallion!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "AAAH!" Twilight shrieked when she looked in the mirror and saw that her horn had turned into a party hat. "Undo! Undo! Undo!" Fortunately, even though it had changed its form, its function had remained the same, and a quick counter-spell had it back to normal. "Are you alright?" asked Fluttershy, pushing her way through the front door in a furtive fashion. "Phew, yes..." The alicorn breathed a sigh of relief. "That was almost a disaster..." "I'm glad you fixed... whatever was wrong." "Thanks! Now, what can I do for you?" Twilight's eyes narrowed suspiciously. "And why did it look like you were sneaking around?" "Oh, that—w-well, I j-just—um..." Fluttershy took a moment to collect herself. This is Twilight, I can trust her. "Um... Rarity's going to g-get me a d-d-date, and—" "WHAT?! You're going to date?!" "I—yes, and I need a book to help—" Twilight gave her a hug and began to bounce in place. "Ooo this is so exciting! I've never helped a friend find love before! There's gotta be something on dating in here somewhere! Hmmm..." She regarded the vast selection of books with a seasoned eye. "Aha, here's one. 'Dating and You: Finding and Keeping That Perfect Somepony'. This seems promising!" She placed it on a table and the two mares crowded together to read it. "Are you looking forward to it?" the princess said. "I guess... maybe... I don't know..." "Who's the lucky pony?" asked Discord. "Yeah, who is it?!" Twilight echoed. "I don't know, Rarity is—EEEEEK!" "DISCORD, WHAT THE HAY ARE YOU DOING IN MY LIBRARY?!" The dragonequis dropped to the ground, rolling and laughing. "You two—HAHA—so predictable—" he said between chortles. "Aah, to mess with Twilight Sparkle's head again... How I missed it." "D-Discord..." Fluttershy's voice trailed off. "Don't be paranoid, I'm not going to tell anyone else about your little 'dating' dilemma; I've got better things to do than gossip like a fourteen-year-old school-dragon." "Seriously, what are you doing here?" Twilight asked with a scowl, clearly unhappy to be playing host to one of her least favorite beings. "You should be more courteous to a visiting friend," Discord scolded. "If you aren't careful, you just might hurt my feelings." "Ha, like you have any feelings to hurt!" Fluttershy gasped and looked at her friend. "Twilight!" "Don't worry, she's right on the money with that one. Well, mostly. I do love our little tête-à-têtes, though..." "Anyways, Fluttershy and I were having a very serious, very private discussion, so if you don't mind..." "I do hope you enjoy talking about stallions and romancing and whatnot!" he said. "Maybe I shall drop in on you again later, when you're in a better mood, Miss Prissy Pants." He closed himself in a book, and when it fell to the floor and opened, he was gone. "I wish you would be nicer to him," the pegasus said reproachfully. "He's a good pon—dragonequis at heart." "Yeah yeah..." Twilight muttered, not meeting her friend's eyes. "A-anyway, let's take a closer look at this book. It says right here..."
Ch 5: In Which Fluttershy Dates, Luna Rages, and a Wild Plot AppearsCh 5: In Which Fluttershy Dates, Luna Rages, and a Wild Plot Appears Luna pranced through the castle, still on cloud nine from her visit to Ponyville. The normally morose alicorn hummed to herself, singing a jaunty little tune that she had heard somewhere or other. Suddenly, she noticed Hamfist, who stood at attention along the hallway. "Good afternoon, Hamfist," she greeted in mock solemnity. "Princess." "How goes the watch?" "The watch goes well, princess." "Barged in on any sleeping ponies lately?" "...Princess?" "Oh, nothing, nothing... Very well, keep up the good work." She continued her trot towards the throne room. "Yes, princess." I do enjoy being in a good mood. In fact, I believe I feel like visiting Twilight again. It may be time to learn how to cook... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ What am I doing here what am I doing here what am I doing here... Fluttershy stood outside of a fancy restaurant in Ponyville, eyes darting back and forth nervously while her knees shook. The past few days had flown by, and before she knew it, the evening that she dreaded had arrived. FLASHBACK "He'll need to be a gentlecolt," Rarity said. "Somepony who will treat you the way you deserve." "Rarity, you don't have to—" "Nonsense!" the unicorn exclaimed. "If this is what it takes to let you be happy again, then I am more than willing to invest all of my time and effort!" "That's not what I mean—" "Aha! I got it! Fluttershy, I think I know just what to do! Let me call a few ponies and see what happens! I'll let you know when I have good news!" UN-FLASHBACK That had been three days ago. Rarity soon returned with a report that she had spoken with Fancy Pants, who had spoken with a friend, who had spoken with a friend, and so on and so forth. Eventually, they had found a stallion who was looking for a mare—Magnum, a prestigious member of the Canterlot nobility. Rarity even asked around about his reputation, receiving nothing but good reports; with those bases covered, it was a simple matter to arrange a dinner date for him and Fluttershy. Oh dear oh dear, what's he going to be like? Is he going to want to do anything afterward? What if he wants to.... *gasp*... kiss me? "Don't let him do anything that makes you feel uncomfortable!" came Rarity's voice. "This is a first date, not a promise of engagement!" Just as she approached the panic threshold, beyond which lay danger of hyperventilation, a large carriage rolled up in front of the pegasus. A burly pony placed a set of portable stairs on the ground and pulled the door open to reveal a very handsome unicorn. He straightened his tuxedo jacket and descended to stand before the petrified Fluttershy. "Ah, you must be my date," the pony she assumed was Magnum said offhandedly. "Well, don't just stand there waiting for a butterfly to flutter down your throat, let us go and sit down." "Um, M-Magnum, s-s-sir—" she began, but he cut her off. "That's 'Lord' Magnum', to you." "D-do you, um..." Fluttershy stuttered, "...do you h-have a f-f-first n-name?" The unicorn's eyes narrowed angrily. "I do not use my first name. Ever." When she looked like she was going to say something else, he barked, "Mention it no more!" The stallion walked forward, not even waiting for his date to follow. Her brow furrowed slightly. Well, this isn't a good start. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Luna came to a skidding-stop in front of the library. Before she could knock on the door, it was yanked open by Twilight herself. "Hi, Luna!" she said cheerfully. "Did you have a good flight?" "I most certainly did." The dark princess walked inside with a bounce in her step. "So, shall we get right to it?" "Certainly!" Just as Luna was going to the kitchen, she noticed a number of sandbags that had been piled up to form a half-circle wall with barbed wire on top. Out of curiosity, the princess peered over the barricade and found Spike lying on the ground, drawing with crayons. He had an army helmet balanced haphazardly on his head. "Spike?" she asked of him, getting the little dragon's attention. "For what reason have you fortified this area?" "Twi's teaching you how to cook, right?" The alicorn nodded. "Well, what I want to do is run from here, screaming, but somebody's gotta make sure she doesn't burn down the library." "I'm certain that your fears are misplaced." "Yeah yeah, we'll see..." "Luna, c'mon! We've got a lot to do!" With a final glance at Twilight's assistant, Luna trotted to join her friend. "So, I was wondering," the dark princess said off-hoofedly as she slipped into an apron, "will fair Fluttershy be joining us?" "Oh, no, she can't tonight," Twilight replied. "She's got a date." "A date?!" Luna exclaimed. "With who?!" "With some noble stallion, Margarine or something," the purple alicorn said, taking no note of her companion's distress. "Alright, so the first step is..." A date? Luna's attention turned to her musings for a minute. I... it is of no concern to me if she desires a mate. No concern at all. With that thought firmly in mind, she returned her focus to her temporary teacher. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "And so she said, 'Of course Magnum's hair is perfect! It's always perfect!'" The stallion finished his story with a tittering laugh. On the other side of the table, Fluttershy halfheartedly giggled, more to be polite and contribute than anything else. In truth, she was nearly bored to tears. Ever since sitting down, Magnum had done nothing except talk about himself. Her nervousness had long ago vanished, replaced by an emotion that approached irritation. "What about you?" he asked suddenly, surprising her with the question. Is he asking me about myself? Maybe he isn't completely wrapped up in himself..."Well, I'm—" she started. "What do you think about my hair?" Nope, he really is. "It's lovely," she said in a flat voice. "Of course it is. You don't even have to tell me." Then why did you ask? "I must say, this 'Ponyville', it's quite the nest of hicks," Magnum stated loudly. "I—I'm sorry?" "It's very quaint and rustic, wouldn't you say?" Just... bear with it, Fluttershy. Only a little longer, and you never have to see him again. Only a little longer... She gave him a fake smile, and the noble launched into another tale about himself. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "C'mon, Flats, this is stupid..." "No way bro! We'll be seriously rich if we can hunt down that castle!" Two stallions, barely out of colthood, pushed their way through the Everfree Forest. The one in front, Flats, an earth pony, had a large knife in his mouth that he was using to cut a path in the vegetation. "Plum, you still back there?" Flats asked around the knife's handle. "Of course I am, no way am I going anywhere in here by myself." "Why don't you do the cutting? You can use your magic to do that, right?" Plum's horn lit up and he took the knife from Flats' grip. "It's not good being here during the night, bro," he said nervously. "Those stories they told us when we were little colts... I don't think they're made-up." "Don't be a wuss," the earth pony said, derision in his tone. "Those mares that always hang out together have been in here tons of times, and they all make it out fine. If a mare can do it, then it'll be no problem for a stallion." "I don't think that's how it works..." However, Plum didn't argue any further, knowing that he wouldn't be changing his companion's mind. "Anyway, I think we should—AAAH!" His front hoof came down upon nothing, and before he knew it, Plum was falling into a hole that had been hidden under the thick vines. He hit an incline and continued to roll down it. Something wet mingled with his mane, but he was spinning too quickly to stop and see what it was. Finally, the slope leveled out and the stallion came to a stop. "Ooooh..." he groaned, rubbing his head gingerly. He created a magical light and looked around to see where he was. He stood in a small stream (fortunately, the wetness was only water, not blood), which came trickling down the slope he had just descended. The tunnel he was in was about twice the height of a pony. Plum was lucky because, although the knife had fallen with him, it hadn't caused any injury. Suddenly, a voice echoed down from the chute's entrance. "Plum!" it called faintly. "Bro, are you alive?" "I'm alright!" the unicorn called back, but Flats didn't say anything more. "That'ss what you think, flessh." Plum whipped around to face further down the tunnel. The deep, gravelly voice had come from that direction, beyond the range of his conjured torch. "Wh-who's there?" he whimpered, backing up slowly. He spun on his back heel once more when he heard something hit the ground from behind. The unicorn immediately realized his mistake when he saw that the noise had been made by a falling stone. Something located behind him drew a ragged breath, and he knew that whatever monster he had come across was standing right there. He stabbed backwards with the knife in the hope of getting a lucky hit, but it was knocked away and fell from his magical grip. "What little nuisssance is thiss, that disssturbss my centuriess-long sslumber?" Plum's head twisted slowly to give him a glimpse of what terrible beast the darkness had conjured, but all he saw was a pair of green eyes. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Mayhaps we should call it a night," Luna said stoically. A layer of fine, white power covered her coat, which meant that she was cleaner than roughly 80% of everything else in the library, including Twilight herself. "I'm sure that I had it right that time," the young princess insisted as she wiped black goo out of her eyes. "Dost thou—my apologies, do you know where all of this... this... " The dark alicorn waved a hoof around to indicate the entire mess. "...stuff... originated?" "I think there was a tiny mistake in the indredient ratio." "How did you make a mistake?! We were making chocolate milk! There are but two ingredients—'chocolate' and 'milk'! I daresay this doesn't even count as 'cooking' in the first place!" "Hey!" Twilight said defensively. "Everypony's gotta start somewhere!" "I tooooold yooooou," Spike called from his sandbag hideout. "Twilight Sparkle, I fear that it is time for me to retire," Luna said. "It is past the time I alotted, and I still have a number of duties to complete before I sleep." "Pfffft... *snicker*... 'duties to complete'..." "Spike! Grow up!" Twilight shouted. "Was that a jest? I do not understand..." "Don't worry about that. Could you help me clean this up before you go?" Luna's horn lit and a spell washed over the room, banishing every last bit of the mess to the nethers. "There, art thou—are you content?" "You'll have to teach me that one," Twilight said, in awe of the older princess's prowess. "Next time, remind me and I shall! Twilight Sparkle, thank you for the cooking lesson." Luna restrained herself from sarcastically emphasizing the word 'lesson'. "I always enjoy spending time with you." "It's no problem, you're a fun pony to hang out with." "I shall see you soon," the night princess said. However, right as she reached for the door handle, she stopped and began to chuckle. "Heh...'Duties'... I get it!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Flats paced back and forth in front of the hole that Plum had fallen down through. The unicorn had initially shouted something up, but for the past half hour, there hadn't been a peep. "That idiot probably got himself killed," the earth pony mumbled. "I should just leave him down there. Yeah, if he hasn't come back up by now, then he's never coming up." In front of Flats, a large bush shook, causing the stallion to jump back in alarm. "Wh-who's there?" he stuttered. When nopony answered, he slowly shuffled in the opposite direction, making sure not to look away. "I-I-I'm j-just leaving, okay? So d-don't hurt me!" The bush was disturbed more violently than before as a pony stepped through it and into sight. "Plum!" Flats exclaimed, recognizing his friend. The unicorn stood there, eyes cast downward. "What took you so long? I was just about to go down for ya!" Plum remained silent; he didn't even look up. "Hey, something wrong? Say something." Flats approached slowly, wondering if Plum had caught some type of contagious disease. Soon, the earth pony was standing directly before his friend. He reached out a hoof to lift the unicorn's chin. Plum's eyelids suddenly shot up, his now-green eyes dancing merrily above a wicked grin. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Magnum's carriage rumbled slowly across the bridge that led to Fluttershy's cottage. The dinner had lasted another two hours, during which she contemplated yawning, sleeping, screaming, running, and murder, all in that order. However, she could finally see that the end was in sight. I'm... I'm not sure I've ever wanted to get away from another pony this badly before, Fluttershy realized. I shouldn't think such bad things about somepony else, though... Alright, I'll be as nice as I can until he leaves! "Th-thank you, for, um..." she began, "...for the n-nice evening." "It was fairly boring, if you ask me," Magnum said, glaring at her. Oh. So much for that... Finally, the carriage stopped in front of her house, and the pegasus wasted no time in getting out. "Good bye, have a good evening," she said politely before turning back to the door. She paused when she heard hoofsteps behind her. "Well? I don't have all night," Magnum stated. The carriage pulled away, leaving him behind. "I don't understand," Fluttershy said. "Why aren't y-you going with them?" "My servants will be back to pick me up in a few hours. I expect you to be very good, to make up for that god-awful dinner." "Wh-what do you m-m-mean?" She slowed backed away, but the stallion stepped forward to maintain their proximity. "I'm going to bed you, of course," Magnum told her. Wh-wh-wh-WHAT? "That's—I don't—but—" "And you have no choice in the matter. Now, let's go." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ When Luna left Twilight's library, she fully intended to return to Canterlot. She hadn't been lying, after all, about having important matters to attend to. However, the princess found her wings taking her in a different direction. If I recall Twilight's directions, Fluttershy lives this way, she thought absently. It cannot hurt just to check, right? However, as she approached the lone cottage that sat in close proximity to the Everfree Forest, she saw that not one, but two ponies stood outside, right next to each other. "That's right, her date," Luna muttered, before realizing that she recognized the stallion. "Hm, I know him from court. I should go now..." Instead of taking her own advice, she hovered in the air above the two, her body nearly invisible against the night sky. This is wrong! I shouldn't spy on her! The princess's actions betrayed her true wishes as she tuned her ears in to what they were saying. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ If I say 'no', then Magnum will definitely just leave, right? Fluttershy thought desperately. There's no way that he... "My patience is wearing thin," the unicorn said. "Do unlock the door so we can get this done with." "N-no." "I beg your pardon?" Fluttershy cleared her throat. "I-I said, 'no'." Magnum's brow descended into a deep scowl. "I already said that you have no choice—you will sleep with me. Now open that door or else I will—what?!" Something had just hit him lightly on the leg. He glanced down to find Angel, ready to deliver a second kick. The unicorn's magic encompassed the little rabbit and lifted him into the air. "Angel!" Fluttershy exclaimed. "Put him down!" "Will you do as I wish?" "I—" With her beloved Angel in danger, the fire vanished from the pegasus's resistance. "Okay..." "Good, then—" A sudden blast of lightning lit up the night sky. Dark clouds formed out of nothingness, and a powerful wind kicked into action. However, none of this was nearly as frightening or awe-inspiring as what slowly descended towards the two ponies. "Release the rabbit, cur, or meet thine end!" Luna boomed, the force of her voice nearly knocking Magnum off of his feet. Her eyes blazed with a pure-white light, and even though her body had become black as a void, she was perfectly visible. A startled Magnum immediately dropped Angel, who was caught up in his owner's embrace. "Who are—" the unicorn started indignantly, but the princess cut him off. "Daffodil Magnum, We have witnessed the crime thou hast committed." "Don't use my whole name!" he shrieked, looking around to see if anypony else had heard. Luna continued as if he hadn't spoken. "Thou shalt appear tomorrow at noon before Us and Our sister, in order to receive thy sentence. Failure to do so would not be wise." "I am a member of a very influential family," Magnum said. "If you leave now, I will forget thi—" "THOU DAREST THREATEN THE PRINCESS OF THE NIGHT?!" she bellowed, taking all of the wind out of his sails. More flashes of lightning brightened the dark sky. "If it is thy wish, We can give thee punishment here and now! However, know that thou hast commited a grevious wrong against fair Fluttershy, who is very dear to Us, and We will not be as merciful as would Princess Celestia..." Her sentence trailed off ominously. "Fine," the unicorn said in a clipped voice. "But this isn't the end. I'll make certain you regret this." He turned and walked away, in the direction of Ponyville, where he would find his servants and chariot. As soon as the noble vanished from sight, Luna allowed her appearance to return to normal. Her mane, which had been a blazing blue, once more mirrored the night sky. The clouds dissipated and the wind died down. "Art thou well?" she asked with concern evident in her tone. "Didst that fiend inflict any injury?" "Princess Luna, if you hadn't—he would've—I would've—" Fluttershy's eyes teared up and she squeezed Angel tightly. What do I do now? Luna thought frantically. What would a friend say? How would a friend act? Then she realized what the most important thing was. What does Fluttershy need? "Um, Fluttershy..." the princess started, uncertain of whichi words would be the best. "Canst thou tell Us... what dost thou require?" "Wh-what do I need?" the pegasus asked, sniffing. "Yes, what dost—do you need? How can I help you? You need but say it, and it shall be done." "Well, um, t-to start, let's just go inside..." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ An emaciated unicorn shambled out of the Everfree Forest, green eyes fixed on the ground in front of it. Where once Plum's mane had been a vibrant purple, it had gone white, and even fallen out in places. His body was wrinkled and his bones had become brittle. It was as if he had aged seventy years in the past few hours. "Thisss body isss weak," it hissed in a sibilant voice. "It ssshall not lasst much longer." "That filthy mongrel... why her sister ever allowed her back into the palace..." The Plum-thing's head snapped around towards the sound. It was a unicorn stallion, stomping down the dirt road. "And how does she know my name?! I swear, she'll regret this..." "Ahh...but thiss one..." the monster whispered. "Itsss hate... smellsss deliciousss..." It turned to meet its newest prey.
Ch 6: In Which Fluttershy is Comforted, Luna Pursues, and Discord Dispenses JusticeLuna and Fluttershy sat inside the cottage, the alicorn trying her best to help the pegasus cheer up. "I must apologize," she said. "I have not had much experience comforting ponies in these situations." "That's alright. Um... just by being here, you're helping." Fluttershy gave the princess a tired smile. Think, Luna, think... "Can I get you something to drink?" Luna hopped to her feet and trotted into the kitchen. "A cup of tea would be very nice," the pegasus admitted. Immediately, the alicorn halted in her tracks. "Uh, heh heh, you probably do not want me to do that." She felt her face burning from embarrassment. "Why not?" "Well, you see, uh, earlier this evening, Twilight Sparkle tried to teach me how to make chocolate milk, and..." "What?!" Fluttershy exclaimed quietly. "Twilight was cooking?! Oh dear, oh my, are you alright? Is she alright? She didn't burn down the library again, did she?" "Nopony got hurt, and nothing burned," Luna said. "There were a lot of strangely-colored things flying through the air, though... But you see, if I cannot do something as simple as milk, then..." She realized that she had never, in all her long years of life, made her own beverage. She remembered pouring them, but never actually creating them. That... is pretty pathetic, she thought. "I understand," the pegasus said. She stood and joined her friend in the kitchen. "Here, I'll teach you how to do it." "Wait, you shouldn't have to do work!" Luna protested. "After what you went through—" "No, um, it's fine. I kinda want to do something to keep myself busy, um, if it's alright." The princess was surprised at how easily the yellow mare went about the task without magic. If Luna had tried to do it by hoof, then she would have likely blown up the kitchen. However, with a bit of simple instruction from a credible source (i.e. anypony who wasn't Twilight), she soon had a steaming mug filled with what appeared to be tea. "Um, so you were at Twilight's," the pegasus said while they cleaned up the area. "I was kind of wondering why you happened to be here... not that I'm ungrateful!" "Twilight told me that you were on a date, but I forgot and decided to fly by just to see if you were still awake. I am... I'm ashamed, but I eavesdropped on you for a few seconds. I did not actually grasp the situation until he threatened your bunny." "Y-you don't have to apologize," Fluttershy told her. "Things would have been worse otherwise—" A sudden pounding came from the door, and the yellow mare seized up. "Stay here," Luna said quietly. As silent as a shadow, she glided to the entrance and whipped it open. However, instead of an attacker, she found a nigh-hysterical Rarity. "Fluttershy! I— oh, Princess Luna!" the unicorn said. "Is Fluttershy— there you are!" She pushed past the princess and buried her yellow friend in a tight hug. "I'm sorry! I'm so sorry! It's all my fault!" "Um, Rarity? How did you know what happened?" Fluttershy asked, confusion clear on her face. "No offense to you, Princess," Rarity said, "but your voice carried clear down to Ponyville, and likely beyond! Why, the only reason the other girls aren't here as well is that they don't know the details that I do." With Rarity on the scene, the princess began to feel like she was out-of-place here. She needs to be alone with a good friend; I should not stay here any longer. "Well, Fluttershy, I shall take my leave now. I hope that you feel well soon, and know that I shall not let that cur off lightly." She turned to leave but was stopped by Fluttershy's voice. "Princess Luna?" she said, pushing herself free of the unicorn's embrace. "I mean, Luna. Th-thank you, for saving me and Angel." "Do not think on it. I would be a poor friend indeed if I had done nothing." "When—whenever you want, if you're, um, just flying by, I don't m-mind if you stop to say hi..." "Really?" Luna asked. Her face lit up with a bright smile. "I... I believe I shall do so. Th...thank you, and farewell." And with that, she spread her wings and departed into the cool night air. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ On a shelf behind Fluttershy sat a small statue of a turtle. It was fairly non-descript, save for one feature—it bore a single fang. The pegasus's gaze passed over it before she realized that she didn't know where she had gotten such an item. However, when she looked again, her puzzlement doubled. The statue was gone, as if it had teleported away. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Green eyes fixed on the alicorn who soared overhead. Normal ponies wouldn't have been able to detect her dark form against the night sky, but the monster possessed unnaturally keen vision. It could sense the power that she wielded, and it knew that it had to make that power its own. The creature now inhabited Magnum's skull, and the aged Plum had been left behind to perish. By accessing Magnum's memories, it learned everything its host already knew about this alicorn, this Princess Luna, and its desire doubled when it discovered that she was apparently immortal. "A body that will not age, that I can possessss forever..." it mused. Further digging taught the monster that its host was supposed to appear before the princess the very next day. A grotesque smile spread across Magnum's face as his feet were turned towards Canterlot, where the ultimate prize lay. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "That's terrible!" Twilight shouted. She grabbed hold of Fluttershy by the shoulders. "How are you feeling? Are you depressed? You aren't hurt, right? Right?!" By this point, she was shaking the poor mare. "Twi—light! I'm—fine! You—can—stop—sha—king—me—now!" "Oh, uh, whoops." The alicorn let go and stepped back quickly. "Heh heh, sorry..." Twilight arrived first thing in the morning, immediately after the rooster's call. She, too, had heard Luna's voice the night before, and after a number of hours had finally managed to get into contact with the dark princess to find out what the hay had actually happened. "You don't have to worry, I'm fine," Fluttershy said, still a little woozy. "Luna came by just in time." "What a terrible first date," Twilight muttered. "At least you don't have to deal with any more of those in the future, though." "Actually, I asked Rarity to help me get another one." "Wh-WHAT?" "I, um, I know that my date was a disaster, but it wasn't her fault. Luna told me last night that Magnum pays his servants to spread good rumors about him—that's why, when Rarity asked around, she was only told positive things." The pegasus took a slow sip of water. "I did ask her to keep it limited to ponies in Ponyville whose names I already know, though. I... think it's safer that way." "That's a decent idea,"" Twilight said. "But why don't you want to take a break? If it were me, I'd want to take it easy for at least a few days. You know, read a nice book, wrap up some side projects I have..." "I just... I think it's important to continue, is all." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The throne room of the alicorn princesses was empty, save for the princesses themselves and a few guards. Normally, ponies came in droves to seek favor from their rulers, but this was a unique occasion. "What do you plan to do, sister?" Luna asked quietly. "I haven't quite decided yet. First, I want to hear what Magnum has to say for himself." "I have no doubt that he shall lie to make it seem like he is the victim, and I the villain." Celestia stretched her wings out gracefully. "That may very well be the case, but he is still entitled to present his side of the story." "The noble Daffodil Magnum, your majesties!" shouted Hamfist. He pulled open a door and showed in the disgraced unicorn. Within seconds, Magnum stood before the princesses, his eyes cast on the ground. His mane had begun to go gray, and his body seemed on the verge of collapse. Why does he appear to have aged since last night? the dark princess wondered. "Daffodil Magnum," Celestia stated, "you have been called here on charges of sexual misconduct—" "Call a rose a rose," Luna hissed at her sister. "It was attempted rape. Do not sugar-coat the crime with sterile words!" "I understand your anger, but this is how it must be done. Don't worry, justice will certainly be served." In a louder voice, she continued. "You have been called here on charges of sexual misconduct. As per Equestrian law, you shall be given this chance to present your defense, and then a sentence will be passed. The floor is yours." Magnum said nothing. "Does this mean you have nothing to say?" the sun princess asked. The unicorn didn't even acknowledge that he was being spoken to; this final insult pushed Luna's anger over the boiling point. "Look at your princess when she speaks to you!" she snapped. He let out a hacking laugh. "Very well." The stallion's head lifted up, and Luna's sight was captured by an emerald gaze. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The monster felt the thrill of victory when Luna's vision fell on its face; it sent its insidious mental tendrils out to capture her in its web, thinking that its success was assured. However, as soon as the reaching tentacles encountered the princess's mind, it knew that something was wrong. Try as it might, the beast could not pierce the barriers surrounding her being. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Almost immediately, Luna felt the attempted intrusion, and her eyes narrowed dangerously. "That is no normal pony!" she rumbled deeply. "Guards, look not into its eyes, else it shall posses thee!" The alicorn's wings flared and she leaped towards the monster, horn-first. Magnum's feet barely managed to move him out of the way to save him from being impaled by a furious goddess. However, the creature was not without its own power. Or rather, Magnum's power. The noble stallion was a relatively powerful magician, and it showed from the fireball that shot from his horn. Luna captured it inside a spherical shield so that it detonated harmlessly, but unfortunately, by that time, Magnum had already escaped past the guards, who were following Luna's command to avoid making eye-contact. "Luna—" said Celestia, but the darker alicorn interrupted her. "Leave this to Us," she said, throwing her sister a confident grin. "The court is thy specialty, but in martial matters, We daresay We are thy better." "Pssh, quit bragging and go get him." She needn't have bothered even say it—Luna was already out the door. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ In her royal bedroom's royal bed, Princess Cadence slept in with her husband. Suddenly, she felt a terrible sense of dread and sat straight up. "What..." Shining Armor paused to release a jaw-cracking yawn. "...what's wrong?" The princess shivered as a cold feeling ran down her spine. "I just had some kind of premonition. Something awful has happened." "What?!" the unicorn exclaimed. "Do you know what it is?! Where did it happen?! Is anypony in danger?!" "...I think somepony finally figured out what Luna's raunchy constellation really is." Shining rolled his eyes and dropped back, earning a disappointed pout from his wife. "Hey," she said, "this is serious! Next time I see her, I'll never hear the end of it!" "Honey, go back to sleep." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The chase led Luna through the halls of the palace at a speed that would have left any other pony bent over, panting from the exertion. However, Luna wasn't "any other" pony. Instead, she was right on Magnum's heels. The dark-purple glow of her magic reached out to grab the fleeing stallion's leg, and for a second it seemed like he would be apprehended, but at the last moment his own magic whipped out and slapped her's away. The force of the spell exceeded that which a normal unicorn should have been able to generate, a fact that gave Luna pause. Whatever monster has taken control of Daffodil's body must be augmenting his magic, she realized. In the end, it didn't matter, because the contest was decided by Magnum's lack of knowledge of the palace layout; he ran straight into a dead end. Luna realized her foe's dilemma and began to slowly move in on him. Once again the creature stared at her and tried to invade her thoughts, and like before, she easily repelled it. It looked around desperately for some route of escape. Finally, its gaze landed on a small grate in the floor. Something inky and black slithered out of Magnum's ear and sped towards the tiny opening. While the stallion collapsed in a heap, Luna lunged forward in an attempt to block the getaway route, but it was to no avail—the thing had gotten away. Instead of wasting time trying to hunt down the elusive creature, the alicorn instead decided to take measures to make future possessions as difficult for it as possible. "Guard!" she said to a nearby pony. "Take this message to your superior and see to it that it is also spread to all other ponies residing in the palace. 'Instruct your mares and stallions to not gaze into deep shadows if they can avoid it. If you see a shadow moving of its own volition, do not look at it. If you see a pony with green eyes, avert your own and inform one of the princesses.' That is all." "Yes, princess!" The guard saluted and galloped off to obey the order. "Luna, what happened?" Princess Celestia serenely walked up to stand beside her sister. "Sister... It appears that our foe is some type of phantom, or perhaps a shape-shifter. It escaped through an opening too small for even a foal." "So you're saying that it could be anywhere." Luna rubbed her forehead, where she could already feel a massive headache forming. "This...thing...Something about it seems terribly familiar." "That's because I created it." Both princesses flinched in surprise at the voice, which came from above. They looked up to find Discord, sitting on the ceiling, staring back down at them. "If you two weren't so forgetful, you'd remember my specters." "AHA!" Luna exclaimed. "I knew you could not be trusted!" "Easy, girl," the dragonequis said, patting the alicorn on the head. "I'm not the one who unleashed it this time. I didn't even know any of those things survived. I swear, you jump down my throat at the slightest provocation." "Are you going to help us capture this 'specter'?" Celestia asked gravely. "Well, I guess I could... It's not like either of you stand a chance on your own." He pointedly ignored the glare the dark princess threw his way. "First, I'm going to need to see what I can learn from this stallion." With a snap of his fingers, a wheelbarrow appeared out of nowhere. Discord picked up the unconscious Magnum and dropped him carelessly into the basket. "I shall go with you," Luna said immediately. "I think I can handle this without cute widdle Wuna's help," he taunted. Celestia put her hoof on the growling alicorn's shoulder. "Luna, don't lose your temper. And Discord, stop provoking her." "Such a stick in the mud..." he mumbled as he wheeled the cart away. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A spot of darkness navigated its way between the pipes in the castle's walls, searching for a place where it could be reasonably safe. It already knew why it hadn't been able to infiltrate the blue cow's mind—she had anticipated such an attack, and likely maintained mental defenses at all times for just such an occassion. It was a combination of a will as powerful as steel, and potent magic. The creature realized that possessing such a creature would require more work than could be accomplished in a mere day. And that only made it want her more. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Magnum's eyes shot open and he groaned in pain; the back of his head was throbbing for some reason. Looking around, the stallion took in his surroundings. He was in what looked to be a guest room at a fairly well-off establishment. How did I get here? he wondered. The last thing I remember... being assaulted by a princess... and those green eyes... "Well good morning, dear fellow!" The unicorn yelped and jumped, only to find himself nose-to-nose with some strange amalgamation of multiple different creatures. Discord sighed and shook his head. "Oh don't be like that, I'm not even trying to scare you right now!" "You-you're that...thing... that the princess keeps around," Magnum said disdainfully. "Discord." "You guessed it right on the first try! Congratulations! Want a cookie?" "Spare me your prattle. Why have you brought me here?" "Some fiendish abomination possessed you, and then attacked the princesses. I brought you here to find out what you could tell me about that." Discord examined his fingernails, as if bored with this whole process. "I remember nothing!" Magnum protested. "I only now just woke up!" "Of course you don't remember anything," the dragonequis said matter-of-factly. "That was just the lie that I concocted for the princesses, a pretense so that I could get you alone to have a friendly chat! Now, what I really want to talk about..." He turned to the stallion with a look in his reptilian eyes that suggested that his intentions were anything but 'friendly'. He flexed his claws menacingly as the temperature in the room plummeted. "...do tell, what's this I hear about you and my dear, sweet, little Fluttershy?" Author's Note And he was never heard from again.
Ch 7: In Which Fluttershy Has a Revelation, and Luna Has an ArgumentFluttershy trudged down the street to where her fourth date waited. Her thoughts drifted back, remembering the dates she had been on over the past month; Rarity took the liberty of planning them, but only after obtaining the her friend's approval on the chosen of stallion. "We can't let anything like...that... happen again," the unicorn had said, in regard to the fiasco with Magnum. For the second date, Fluttershy met with one of the weather team's pegasi, a stallion recommended by Rainbow Dash. The yellow mare couldn't help but admit that he was a very nice pony, and he had shown definite interest in her, but the feelings weren't reciprocated. The stallion was clearly disappointed, but remained admirably courteous to the end. Stallion number three had been nearly the same. He had recently gone through a very public falling-out with his (ex) marefriend, but Twilight affirmed that his character was sound. For the entirety Fluttershy's date with him, he dropped frequent hints that he found the yellow pegasus fascinating, but like before, she found it impossible to view the poor stallion in a romantic light. Since then, Fluttershy's couldn't help but wonder why success eluded her. What was wrong with those two ponies? she thought fretfully each night before going to bed. Or... is it something wrong with me? Despite her negative thoughts, she put on a brave face when Rarity told her that a fourth stallion had been lined up. The unicorn wouldn't give any details on the mysterious pony, other than to say Fluttershy already knew him well. Well, after tonight, I'll just tell Rarity that it's no use, the pegasus thought sadly, coming back to the present. I'm destined to be alone forever... Her musings were interrupted when she ran, nose-first, into something very solid. "Fluttershy?" asked the thing she had collided with. "Are ya okay?" She looked up into the concerned eyes of Applejack's brother, Big Macintosh. "Big Mac," she said, slightly confused. "I'm fine, but...why are you here?" She realized that she stood in front of the restaurant where she would be eating. "Well, that Rarity told me to be here to meet some friend of hers. Ah reckon it's a date or somethin." What?! I'm dating Big Macintosh?! "Uh uh uh um..." "Somethin' wrong?" "W-w-w-well, I-I'm, th-that is, I th-th-think that she m-m-meant m-me." This is terrible! Big Mac's a good friend! How do I let him know I'm not interested? Oh no, what do I do? "Huh. Well, ain't that interestin'," Mac said, seemingly unfazed. "I guess we should sit down, then." He politely held the door open for the yellow mare. Rarity and I are going to have such a talk when I see her next... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ In a bush right outside the restaurant, Rarity suddenly sneezed, causing her to nearly drop her binoculars. "Hmm, I hope that doesn't mean somepony's thinking bad things about me..." "Who's there?" demanded a nearby voice. The branches parted to reveal Applejack, who had been hiding in the very same bush. "Rarity! Are you spyin' on mah brother?!" "I'm just here to ensure Fluttershy's well-being," the unicorn retorted. "After that disaster with Magnum, it's my solemn responsibility to look after her, no matter how much I trust the stallion! Besides, aren't you doing the exact same thing?" "...Fine, ya caught me. But the only reason Ah'm here is to make sure Big Mac doesn't stick his hoof in his mouth!" "And why would he do such a thing?" "Don't tell me ya haven't noticed," Applejack said. "That big doofus's had a crush on Fluttershy for years. Iffen he did somethin' to mess this up, he'd be devastated! As his kin, Ah gotta do what Ah can to help." "So it seems we both have noble intentions. Well then, it's decided!" Rarity clapped her hooves and stood quickly. "What's decided?" "We'll get ourselves a table in there so that we can keep track of their progress, of course!" The earth pony tossed her friend a doubtful glance. "Isn't that a bit too obvious? There ain't no way they won't see us." "And that, dear Applejack, is why I prepared disguises! It's a good thing for you that I have an extra." "...Why do Ah feel like Ah'm not goin' to like this?" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Cow!" "Cad!" "Half-wit!" "Insufferable bed-sore!" Celestia walked quickly into the banquet hall to find Luna and Discord nose-to-nose and in the midst of a battle of insults. "What are you two doing?" she demanded. "Here I am, minding my own business, when our sheltered Princess of the Night decides that she has the authority to tell me what to do!" "That is because We do have the authority to command thee!" Luna shot back. "And Our only request was that thou cleanse thy mess! It is thine own creation that is running rampant, after all." "How many times do I have to say this before it sinks into your thick blue skull?" he said. "I built that thing a couple-thousand years ago, then promptly forgot about its existence! I can't remember what I ate for lunch, how do you expect me to remember anything about a stupid trifle like that specter?" "For the life of Us, We cannot tell what it is that Fluttershy sees in thee." "As if I care what some moronic winged moose thinks of me," the dragonequis said with a snort. He realized immediately that he could have chosen better words, due to the way the entire hall darkened; a seething Luna's body drew in nearly all of the afternoon light streaming in through the room's majestic windows. "Choose thy words with care when speaking of Fluttershy," she rumbled dangerously. Just as Celestia opened her mouth to intervene, Discord spoke up. "Pssh, I was talking about you, Miss Moronic Winged Moose, not that unfortunately timid pegasus. Although... now I'm wondering why you're getting so angry over her." For a few seconds he stared into the dark princess's eyes, searching for something. The dragonequis apparently found what he wanted, because his face lit up with mirth and he collapsed to the floor, holding his ribs; peals of his laughter echoed through the castle. "What dost thou find so humorous?" "HAHAHA—oh, noth—heheh—nothing." Discord wiped the tears out of his eyes and stood, still snickering. "It's just that...ah, haha... wittle itty bitty Wuna's in wuv!" With that, his body coiled in on itself and he disappeared into thin air. In Discord's absence, heavy silence pervaded the atmosphere. The two alicorn princesses glanced at each other uneasily. "Luna," Celestia said finally, "is that true?" The other princess took a moment to gather her thoughts. As she calmed, her language moved into a more modern dialect. "It is true that I am very fond of Fluttershy, but..." "But what?" "... I do not know; I have never loved before, so I know not how I would feel. However, I feel that Discord is just saying it to annoy me." "So you don't love anypony?" the white alicorn asked. "I do not believe so." Celestia sighed deeply. "That's a shame... It's a wonderful feeling." Suddenly, a puff of green smoke bloomed in mid-air and a tightly rolled scroll fell to the ground between the two mares. "It seems that Twilight Sparkle has a message for you," Luna said. "I shall take my leave so you—" "No, Luna, the letter isn't for me. It has your name on it." The dark princess received correspondence on such a rare basis that her heart nearly skipped a beat. She eagerly accepted the message, coming close to tearing the parchment in her haste to get to the words inside. Dear Luna, I am writing to invite you to once again spend time with my friends and me for an evening, three days from now. If this is agreeable to you, you can let me know with a letter sent straight to Spike. I'm sure Princess Celestia would be happy to share the spell with you that will allow you to do so. Thank you, and I hope to see you in three days! Your Friend, Twilight Sparkle P.S. This time, I asked the girls if they were free before deciding on a set date! See, I can learn from my mistakes! Celestia couldn't help but grin at the way her sister's eyes lit up as she read the letter out loud. "If you want, I can show you how to send scrolls to Spike right now." The halls reverberated with the sound of Luna's subsequent, "Huzzah!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Ah knew Ah wasn't goin' to like this!" Applejack and Rarity sat together at a table squeezed into a corner of the room. Both of them had ridiculously large-and-frilly hats perched upon their heads. "What do you mean? These bonnets are the height of fashion!" "Maybe if yer ma dropped y'all on yer head when y'all was little," the earth pony said with a snort. "Plus, aren't these s'posed to be disguises? We stand out more with 'em than without!" "Tell me, would Fluttershy or Macintosh ever guess that you would willingly wear something like that?" Rarity asked. "I... ok fine, ya win this round." "Good! Now hush, let's see if we can hear what they're saying!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ On the other side of the room, Fluttershy and Big Macintosh meekly poked at their salads. The conversation up until this point hadn't developed beyond "yes or no" questions, and both ponies were beginning to wonder if it wouldn't just be better to run screaming from the restaurant. Finally, the pegasus reached the point beyond which she couldn't stand the tension. "M-Mac, I'm sorry, b-b-but I d-don't think this is a g-g-g-good idea." "...Yup," he said, "Ah was 'fraid you'd say that." "P-please, don't feel bad! You're wonderful, it's all m-me!" "...Yup," Mac said again, but his voice lacked conviction. As the stallion's expression fell, so too did Fluttershy's heart. I can't just let him feel awful for something that isn't his fault. I suppose I have no other choice... "Um, M-Mac, can you—can you keep a secret?" His face showed confusion, but he nodded anyway. "Um, well I... oh, how do I say this... I, um, I d-don't like... I don't like..." "What don't ya like?" he asked. "Red hair? Yokes? Apples? Charminly rustic accents? It's fine, Ah don't—" "Stallions!" she blurted out quietly. "I d-don't like stallions!" "Huh? What's wrong with..." Fluttershy could have sworn that she heard a *ding* as realization dawned in the stallion's eyes. "Oh. OH!" "I d-didn't mean to waste your time..." "Naw, it's fine." "I'm still j-just trying to fi-figure it all out for m-myself." "Don't worry yourself. If anythin', it's a load off mah chest. Ain't nothin' Ah can do 'bout bein' a stallion, that's for sure." The pegasus gave him a tiny smile. "I'm glad you're feeling better..." She stood to leave. "I'll—I'll pay the bill on my way out, so—" "Now hold on there." Macintosh touched her lightly on the shoulder to keep her from departing. "There ain't no reason to leave. We can still be pals, can't we?" "I..." Fluttershy returned slowly to her seat. "Yes, we can!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "There," Rarity said with satisfaction, "they're getting on famously!" "Fer once, Ah have to agree with ya," Applejack replied reluctantly. Ever since Fluttershy had stood, like she was leaving, she and Macintosh had been far more talkative towards each other. It seemed like "Mission: Get Fluttershy a Good Stallion" was a rousing a success. "I believe that our presences are no longer required." The unicorn pushed her stool back and stood. "Macintosh seems to have the situation well in-hoof, wouldn't you say?" "Ah... Ah guess he's goin' to be fine." "Very good, I'm glad you think so. Now! Who wants to get some ice cream?" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A giddy Princess Luna dropped onto her bed and waved her hooves in the air. "So many years," she said, "and finally, I'm being invited to 'hang out' with a group!" "...wittle itty bitty Wuna's in wuv!" Discord's words floated through Luna's mind, severely dampening her excitement. Hmph, love. The very notion is ridiculous. But you do have strong feelings towards the mare, a dissenting voice told her. Yes, but merely because she's only my second friend, the princess argued. I am certain that I will feel the same towards Twilight's other friends when I meet them! Maybe, but if that was true, then wouldn't you also feel the same towards Twilight herself? Luna had a more difficult time finding an answer to that. She is—Twilight Sparkle is different. The voice chuckled. Do you really believe what you're thinking? Yes! I—yes! Fluttershy is a good friend, nothing more! I would never wish for anything beyond that! You do realize that you're arguing with a strange voice in your head, right? That type of behavior can get you committed, you stupid cow. Stupid cow...? The princess's eyes narrowed as she realized just who she had been mentally sparring with. "Discord!" she barked. "Show yourself!" A tiny form emerged from the depths of Luna's billowing mane. "Phew, the inside of your head is certainly cramped," Discord said. "Not a lot of room, just like I thought. Truth be told, I was beginning to get claustrophobic." She whipped her head suddenly, sending the little dragonequis tumbling to the ground, where she trapped him under a hoof. "You try my patience," she growled. "If you value your continued good health, it is my suggestion that you leave me be." "Bah, you really need to learn how to lighten up." His body became paper-thin and slipped out from under the princess's weight. "It's not like I'm just fabricating this 'love' stuff off the top of my head. Trust me, acceptance is the first step to moving on!" A wicked smile spread across Luna's face. "I hear that dragonequis steak is particularly fine this time of year." A dark-blue glow encompassed her horn. "Why don't we journey to the kitchens and find out—" "I assure you, that won't be necessary. I think I can take a hint." He exploded in a shower of confetti and was gone. "Pfft, that creature is a pox upon this land," the princess said disdainfully. She made to return to the bed, but paused when she found that a white box now occupied her place. A piece of paper on top bore the words, in curvy writing, For Luna. "Where did this come from?" Any other pony would have been immediately suspicious of a gift that appeared out of nowhere. In fact, most other ponies would expect there to be a pie inside, sitting on a coiled spring, just waiting to be launched into the face of whoever opened it. The guileless Luna never stood a chance. Face dripping in whipped cream, strawberry filling, and pie crust, she bellowed so loudly that her voice carried all the way to Ponyville, and likely beyond. "DISCOOORD!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Diissscoooooorrrddd..." Fluttershy and Big Mac's ears swivelled as the eerie voice floated through the air. "What in tarnation..." "Oh dear, I hope Luna doesn't hurt him too badly," the pegasus mumbled. The two ponies stood at the gate to Sweet Apple Acres, where they said their farewells before parting ways. "Well, thank ya for a fun time," Big Mac said. "Ah hope it weren't too awkward." "Oh not at all, I'm just glad your feelings aren't hurt." "Yer a kind pony. Some mare's goin' to be mighty lucky to have you." Fluttershy's mind froze. "A-a m-m-mare?" "Er, well, yeah," the stallion said. "Ah just reckon, if ya ain't into stallions ...well, who else is there besides mares?" "That's—why—you—" The pegasus stuttered while her mind tried to assimilate this new information; a wide smile grew across her face as it sank in. "Thank you, Mac! Thank you thank you thank you!" She gave him a quick hug, then turned and pranced happily away. "Yer welcome? Ah don't get it," he muttered, waving briefly before moving towards the farmhouse, where his sister likely sat waiting for him to tell her how things had gone. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Hee, mares, heehee! Why didn't I think of that?" Fluttershy said in a cheery voice. "I'm so happy!" But, what'll the other girls think? I'll tell them, of course! I tell them everything! But... this is so embarrassing to talk about... The idea of having a chat about sexuality with her best friends caused a bright blush to form on her cheeks. I can't keep this a secret forever, but... maybe just a little longer.
Ch 8: In Which Pinkie Returns, Fluttershy Avoids Talking, and Luna Gets Overly DepressedThree days later, Luna once more alighted in front of the Ponyville library. "I seem to be coming here quite often, recently," she mused. "Not that that's a bad thing, I mean." I wonder if Fluttershy has arriv—no, it does not matter! We're friends! Friends! Nothing more! To think anything else is— "Um, h-hi, Luna." "UWAHAhaha!" the princess shrieked, spinning defensively and adopting a fighting stance. Her face burned with embarrassment when she saw that it was just Fluttershy who had come up behind her. "Erm, *cough*, good evening, Fluttershy! How farest thou?" "Happy that you're here," the pegasus admitted. "I-I'm sorry to have frightened you." "Do not fear, thou didst not truly alarm Us! That—it was merely a move We have been practicing!" Curses, why can I not speak normally? "It is good to see th—you." "I thought I heard voices out here," said Twilight, poking her head past the now-open door. "C'mon in, everypony else is waiting!" The moment Luna stepped into the room, all noise cut off. Rarity, Applejack, and even Rainbow Dash (although she tried to hide it) all stared at the newcomer with uncertainty in their eyes. "Greetings?" Luna said nervously. She threw on the most charming smile that she could muster. The tension in the room was so taut that a knife could have cut it. Finally, Rainbow broke the atmosphere. "So, um... have you ever heard of the Wonderbolts?" "Rainbow! What makes ya think the princess'll care about that?" Applejack snapped. Once the first question had been asked, all reservations were discarded almost immediately. Twilight re-introduced the mares to the princess, and they began to ply her with questions. Rainbow was by far the most inquisitive of the bunch. Earlier, Twilight had mentioned to her how Luna was well-known as the general of Equestria's armies, and the pegasus's thirst for more knowledge had only sharpened over time. "Technically I am still the leader of the grand Equestrian army, but it is an empty title," Luna explained. "There has not been any need for such a force in decades, and thus the army only consists of the castle guard." "But still," Rainbow said, "you probably know all sorts of cool fighting moves and stuff!" "Well, I... yes, I do know quite a bit about things pertaining to combat." A full hour passed before Luna realized that one mare was missing. "Twilight, is there not another pony who is part of your group? Pinkie Pie, the element of laughter, if I remember." "Yeah, that's... we're not really sure where Pinkie has been—she just disappeared a month ago. I'm actually getting a litle worr—" The doorbell cut the young princess off. "Ah got it," Applejack said, trotting to the door and pulling it open. "What can Ah—Pinkie!" The mare in question stood in the doorway, her face sporting a passive expression. "Pinkie! We were just talking about you!" "Where have you been?" "What have you been up to?" "C'mon in, siddown and tell us what ya've been doin'!" As the pink mare serenely took a seat, Luna leaned towards Fluttershy. "Is she not well known for always smiling and being joyful? Why, then, is her expression so bland?" "I noticed that too," the pegasus whispered back. "I hope nothing's wrong." "Don't worry, Fluttershy, I'm fine," Pinkie said, apparently having heard what their quiet exchange. "I just spent the past couple weeks in the mountains, training under a master in the ways of parate." Twilight frowned. "You mean 'karate'?" "No, silly, I mean 'parate'. I learned that the true party master keeps her emotions on the inside. I'll be right back; I have to go to the little fillies' room." "This is bad, girls," Twilight said as soon as Pinkie left. Rarity frowned in confusion. "Why do you say that?" "You know how Pinkie is always acting... hyper? I can't think of a better word... Anyway, what would happen if she restrained all of that energy?" "I don't get what you mean," Rainbow said. Applejack coughed to get everypony's attention. "Ah think Ah understand... If she's not lettin' the 'hyper' out, then it'll build up like crazy, so that when she does let it out, it'll be a lot stronger than usual." "Exactly! You know, AJ, I think you've got a bit of a scientist in you..." Hoofsteps announced Pinkie's return. "Now," she said, "shall we get this party started?" Nopony saw her move, but a bright pink flash lit the room, blinding all present. As soon as their vision returned, they gasped in amazement. Streamers hung from the ceiling in intricate patterns. At least a dozen assorted types of food lay on a table that had not previously been in the library. Balloons floated in the air, games sat open and ready to play, a bright-red punch swirled in its glass bowl... It was too much to have been done by an earth pony in just the blink of an eye. "I never..." Luna started, gazing blankly at the festive array. "When did... this is..." "This is Pinkie Pie," Twilight provided helpfully, as if that explained everything. "Actually, I kinda like this! Usually there's more of a mess for me to clea—" "I FORGOT THE CONFETTI!" Pinkie shrieked happily. Explosions of color appeared at the ceiling, and what must have been a forest's worth of multi-colored confetti floated down. Miraculously, none of it contaminated the food or beverages. "Why did I say that?" the purple alicorn moaned. "Of course there's a mess. There's always a mess!" Rainbow saw the party master grin to herself while bouncing in place. "Hey, Pinks, I thought you were trying to be emotionless, or something." "Oh I was, but that got so boring!" she chirped. The next few hours were some of the happiest that Luna could remember. She talked, she laughed, and she joked, and the whole time, Fluttershy sat beside her. They conversed with each other constantly, sharing opinions and ideas, and generally enjoying each other's presence. The alicorn found that her friend had plenty of insight, and that she noticed quite a lot—all one needed to do was listen. "Um, you've got some..." the pegasus said, pointing at Luna's cheek, "...you've got some icing on your face." "Oh, Luna, I just remembered!" Twilight said. "Did you have any luck finding whatever creature it was that attacked you and Princess Celestia?" The dark princess's face sobered. "Alas, the specter has eluded our best efforts. Likely, it is not even in Canterlot anymore. In fact..." Her eyes widened, as if disturbed by a troubling thought. "Its goal was to possess my body, but it is possible that any alicorn would satisfy its needs. Tell me, how learned are you in magic that defends the mind?" "I understand the basics, but I've never tried to apply them..." Luna sighed sadly. "It is regrettable, but I believe it to be very important that I teach you how to properly shield yourself from mental invasion." "Right now?" "I'm afraid so." "I... I understand." Twilight turned to her other friends, eyes immediately fixing on the disappointed look that Fluttershy wore. "Um, girls—" "It's ok!" Pinkie said. "We'll be alright until you're done!" Luna and her fellow princess separated themselves from the rest of the group. "Now," she began, "the most important thing to remember is that you must maintain this spell constantly. Never release it, even when sleeping. Do you understand?" "I—I think so." "Very well. To cast it, you must first clear your mind, then..." Her horn glowed and she wove the magic into exactly the form she desired. "...just like so." Twilight imitated Luna's example, and on the very first try, successfully created a barrier to protect her thoughts. "Whoa, this is... I can already feel it sapping my strength! It's going to be tiring, keeping this up all the time, isn't it?" "Unfortunately, that is the case," Luna replied. "However, it will become easier, both as you get used to it and as your own abilities improve. If you're ready, I am going to test the integrity of your spell." When Twilight nodded, Luna's pupils vanished, and the purple alicorn felt something bump against her barrier. Suddenly, the shield was rent asunder and cast aside before Luna's voice echoed through her head. As you can see, it is not perfect yet. However, I judge that your skill is adequate for the time being. "Is there anything else I need to know about this?" "There is one thing to keep in mind," the dark mare said. "The strength of your barrier is dependent upon your resolve. If you have a strong mind, then the shield will be strong as well. However, if you lose the will to protect yourself, then an enemy will have no problem at all in breaking through." "Wait, does that mean that the spell fails if I get really sad? That's a pretty silly weakness, if you ask me." Luna opened her mouth to elaborate further when, from across the library, she heard Pinkie say, "Wait, what?! Fluttershy, you've been dating?!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Fluttershy watched as Luna and Twilight held their hushed conversation. From time to time, their horns would light up, making it clear that they were casting spells. For the first time in her life, the pegasus found herself wishing that she, too, had the ability to use unicorn magic. Perhaps then Luna would take her into a corner and— ...What? Fluttershy wondered. I've never thought something like that before! Am I... jealous of Twilight? It did make sense—after all, the youngest princess got to spend quite a bit of time with Luna. Even more, Twilight was the dark princess's very first friend. But why does that even matter? Luna's my friend anyway, no matter what Twilight is to her. I have no reason to be jealous of anypony. She forcibly banished all thoughts of jealousy from her mind. "So, Fluttershy, I haven't gotten to see you in the past few days," Rarity said, dragging the pegasus out of her reverie. "How did your big date go?" "Wait, what?!" Pinkie exclaimed, jaw dropping. "Fluttershy, you've been dating?!" Luna visibly flinched, but only the yellow mare noticed it, so absorbed were the rest of them in her answer. "Um, I-I have..." Fluttershy said. She didn't enjoy being in the spotlight under normal conditions, and the current topic only made things worse. "Who?! When?! Where?! Why?!" Pinkie stood nose-to-nose with the pegasus. "A b-bunch of p-po-ponies, over the p-past few weeks." "Pinkie, you're making her nervous!" the white unicorn said admonishingly. "Let her breath, at least." "Oh. Sorry..." "It's okay." Fluttershy became suddenly aware of Luna's presence. The alicorn, who hadn't made a move to cross the room, didn't say anything, but she was clearly listening. I shouldn't discuss this where she'll hear me... "But do tell us the details of your date," Rarity continued. "It would be wonderful if you and Mac got together, after all." "Why do you say that?" Rainbow asked. "Well, he is one incredible hunk of a stallion—" "Hey! That's mah brother y'all are talkin' about!" "That doesn't change the truth, dear." "Um..." I can't tell them how it really went, not yet! But I can't lie and make something up either. What do I say, what do I say... "It was... n-nice." For a moment, nopony said a thing, and only after a very uncomfortable few seconds of staring did Rainbow voice what was on everypony's mind. "'Nice'?" "Yes. 'Nice'." There, problem solved! she thought proudly. "Funny, that's what Big Mac said when I asked him," Applejack mused. Fluttershy glanced at Luna, strangely nervous over what she thought of it. "L-Luna...?" "I must thank all of you," Luna said, not even looking at the pegasus. "I know that you gathered here to make me feel welcome, and I appreciate it greatly. I hope that you consider me a friend, as I do all of you. However, I just recalled that there is something in Canterlot that requires my immediate attention. Again, thank you, and farewell." The silence was pregnant as she abruptly walked out, shutting the door behind her with a little more force than was necessary. "What crawled up her plot?" Rainbow asked. "Rainbow!" Fluttershy said in a raised voice, which surprised everypony. She put her nose right up against the other pegasus's. "That is not how we talk about our friends! Think about how you would like it if we said things like that about you when you weren't here!" "I... I guess I wouldn't..." "Luna is our friend, and we should trust her! If she says that she has work to do, then that's the truth!" She suddenly noticed how all her other friends were staring at her, and she cringed backwards. "W-wait, that's... I m-mean... oh, I didn't have to be so angry about it... I'm sorry..." "Nah, it's alright," the blue pegasus said bashfully. "That was a pretty rude thing for me to say, so..." "Hey, let's all cheer up!" Pinkie shouted. "Nopony meant anything bad, so we can forget about it! Now, howsabout we eat up some of this cake..." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Shadows littered the road that connected Ponyville and Canterlot. The wind blew lightly, causing the tree branches to dance. However, one spot of murky darkness moved separately from the myriad shadows. It slithered from tree trunk to tree trunk, searching for the prize that it knew had to be here. It knew that it was close. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Luna flew through the night sky, performing acrobatic stunts in order to blow off some steam. She knew that if she exerted herself, she wouldn't have to worry about thinking. She wouldn't have to worry about her. The princess turned downwards and dived, spinning in a corkscrew as she plummeted towards the ground. Only at the last moment did she open her wings and pull up, thus avoiding meeting her end as an alicorn pizza. Luna felt her muscles begin to tire, but she refused to take a break. If she stopped, her mind would start moving again, and that was to be avoided. She conjured a series of glowing hoops in mid-air and proceeded to navigate her way through them at high velocity. The hoops began to move, which meant that more coordination would be required in order to fly through them. Luna didn't even pause as she pushed herself to her limits. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A pair of eyes, watching from afar, narrowed, before the owner turned and darted away in a rainbow-colored flash. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Another fine evening with our friends," Rarity reminisced to Fluttershy as they walked together. "And I'm so glad to have met Luna at last! She's simply marvelous! Such grace—such poise—such confidence!" Her eyes sparkled with admiration. You don't have to tell me... Fluttershy thought. "She seemed unhappy when she left, though." "Perhaps it was just because she had to leave early? You would know better than I." The unicorn nudged her friend playfully. "You kept her to yourself all evening!" "I did?!" The pegasus's face grew apologetic. "I-I'm so sorry, I d-d-didn't mean to! I was j-just—" "It's fine, dear, I was just teasing," Rarity assured her. "Although it's true that you two were nearly insep—" "Hey!" shouted Rainbow, landing between the two mares. "Rarity, you mind if I borrow Fluttershy?" "We're nearly at the boutique anyway, so feel free! Good night!" She waved farewell as her friends took to the sky. "Wh-what did you want me for?" Fluttershy asked. "C'mon, there's something I gotta show you." Within a few minutes, the two pegasi arrived over a field along the borders of the Everfree Forest. "I'm not..." Fluttershy started, confused. "What am I looking for?" "Over there," Rainbow answered while pointing at a low-hanging cloud. "See who's sitting on that?" "I don't—" The yellow mare gasped when she realized that it was Luna, lounging around after having told her friends that she was leaving to do work. "Rainbow, I—I guess you were right." "Naw, that's not it," the other pegasus said. "I didn't bring you here to get her in trouble or anything. Look, see how exhausted she is? She's sweating and panting like crazy!" Sure enough, Fluttershy could see that Rainbow was right. "You didn't see her before, but she was going through one hay of a workout." "I don't understand..." "Isn't it obvious?! Something's bothering her! Look, whenever I get down about something—not that I ever let anything get me down—I do things that'll tire me out. It keeps me from having to think about whatever the problem is." Fluttershy put a hoof up to her chin thoughtfully. "And you're saying that Luna did all that exercise just so she wouldn't worry about something?" "Yup." "Then—why did you need me, if you already know all this?" "Come on, are you gonna make me explain everything?" Rainbow whined. "I may not be the most 'touchy-feely' pony in Ponyville, but even I could see that she's a lot closer to you than to me." "So..." "So, you have the best chance of cheering her up!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Out on the cloud, Luna sprawled on her back while her chest rose and fell heavily. A full hour of intense flying left her with almost no energy, but unfortunately, as soon as the workout ended, her thoughts turned themselves back on. Fluttershy is dating... they whispered in her head. Dating a stallion... a real hunk of a stallion... "Stop—*pant*—it—*wheeze*—" Luna ordered. She belatedly noticed the presence of tears on her cheeks. She's dating... their date was nice...they're very happy together... "L-Luna?" When she heard her name, the princess scrambled to her hooves, nearly falling from the cloud in the process. She managed to stand up straighten her tiara before regarding the visitor; although she hadn't been expecting anypony to find her, she was still surprised to find that it was Fluttershy. "Ah, no! This isn't—I'm not—" She sighed sadly. "You caught me... I-I don't actually have anything important that needs to be done right this instant..." "It's ok," the pegasus said, landing on the cloud to sit beside the blue mare. "I'm sure you had a good reason for making it up." Instead of answering, Luna swallowed heavily and sat down as well. "Why are you crying?" "I am not crying!" the alicorn insisted. "But, your face—" "It is but sweat!" The yellow mare decided not to press the point. "So..." Fluttershy started when she saw that her companion wasn't going to speak further, "do you want to talk about what's bothering you? I m-mean, only if you d-don't mind." "Wha?! Why—why dost thou ask that?" Talk like a modern pony, Luna. "Sorry, I meant, what makes you think something is wrong?" "Well, um, Rainbow kind of saw you flying, and, um, figured out what you were trying to do, so she brought me here." "She—she was worried about me?" "Any of your friends would be worried!" "...Very well, I shall admit that there is an issue that is... troubling me." Why am I telling her this? "But it is something that I must overcome on my own." Although I know not how I shall accomplish that... "Some problems are easier to solve with help," Fluttershy said, thinking of a time when Applejack had tried to solo-harvest her entire orchard. "I understand, but this is not one of those problems. It is very... personal, I suppose is the best way to describe it." "I-I'm sorry if I'm prying," the pegasus apologized. Her head tilted downwards. "I d-didn't mean to make you unc-comfortable—" Well done, Luna, now you're making her feel bad, too! "Do not make that face, please; I truly do appreciate the offer. If I change my mind, you shall be the one I speak with about it. How is that?" "I'd be more than happy to help you with any problem!" For a few long minutes, the two mares simply sat and observed the night sky. Luna inspected it for any flaws, while Fluttershy merely enjoyed the sight. "B-back at the library, when the girls asked me about my date..." The pegasus's hesitant words startled Luna so badly that she once again nearly fell from the cloud. As soon as the crisis passed, Fluttershy continued. "I'm not, um, actually with Big Macintosh. We agreed to be friends early on. It was a nice dinner with a friend, but that was it." "What about him did you not like?" That is a relief... Luna shook her head to clear it of the unwanted thought. No, it's not a relief! Not a relief at all! Why would it be a relief? "It wasn't him. He's actually a very nice pony... I'm the one who..." Her voice trailed off before the sentence's end. Luna almost asked about what Fluttershy didn't want to say, but at the last second decided against it. If she wanted to tell me, then she would. I must respect her privacy, since she is respecting mine. The alicorn turned her gaze back to the stars, but looked back down immediately when something bumped into her side. "I'm sorry," the pegasus said, trying to stifle a yawn. She was wobbling a little bit, which had caused her to lean into the other mare for a moment. "I should be in bed and asleep by now, but—" She yawned again. "—it's just so nice out here, I would hate to go inside." Luna felt her heart melt as a third yawn came. Surprised at her own audacity, the princess stretched out a wing and wrapped it over Fluttershy's back. A friendly wing! This is nothing more than that! "If you wish to sleep, you may do so here," she said in answer to the yellow mare's uncertain glance. Fluttershy accepted the offer, and she was soon asleep, head burrowing into Luna's chest. Friends do things like this, right? I'm sure friends cuddle all the—oh, who am I kidding? Watching tenderly over her slumbering companion, the alicorn sighed in resignation. I...I guess... Discord was right the whole time. I'm in— "'I guess Discord was right the whole time', you're probably thinking," said Discord from above. "You're in love!" "Y-you!" she exclaimed, craning her neck to look at the dragonequis. "Stop doing that! How long have you been up there?!" "Long enough!" he said gleefully. "Haa, just try to argue with me now—I dare you! No, wait, I double diamond dog dare you!" "...Very well. I shall admit that perhaps there is the smallest kernel of truth to what you say, just this once." A giant, glowing sign burst into existance directly in front of the stunned princess. In bold words, it read, I TOLD YA SO!'; a loudspeaker, shouting "Nya nya nya nya!" completed the effect. "What a relief! I almost thought that this billboard was going to go to waste in my warehouse of unused props, but thanks to you, I get to use it at least once!" "Be silent!" Luna hissed. "You'll wake her!" "Pssh, an earthquake couldn't wake this one when she's sleeping," Discord scoffed. "I should know—she slept through every single one of my 'good morning, sunshine!' pranks. What a waste of time that was." He tugged Fluttershy's mane lightly, then rapped her on the head with his knuckles. "See?" Instead of waking up, she just gave a loud snore and dug herself further into her "pillow". "It is amazing how she can make even a snore seem adorable," the alicorn noted. "Yes, I never did figure out how she does that..." Luna realized that she was having an almost-civil conversation with this vile creature. "Fine, my secret is out! I have feelings for this pegasus! What do you intend to do with that knowledge?" "Well, I was planning on leaving you be and doing nothing, but if you want, I can put up posters... maybe take out an ad in The Equestrian Times... ooo, what about a documentary about this forbidden love?" "Doing 'nothing' will suffice," Luna said with as much dignity as she could muster. "Yeah, that's what I thought." Discord let out an exagerated yawn. "But as much as I love hanging out with a cow as boring as you, there are actual important things for me to do, so I'll bid you adieu!" "Who dost thou name, 'cow'?" she asked angrily to the space where he had disappeared. "Fiend..." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ On the underside of the cloud, green eyes glittered wickedly. The specter had heard everything said above, and it finally knew what to do in order to make the blue one its own.
Ch 9: In Which Luna Meets Phineas, and Pinkie Uses a BrickLike every morning, Fluttershy awoke to the crowing of the rooster; unlike every morning, her eyes opened to a world devoid of light. I'm under the quilt... she thought with a yawn. I guess it's time to greet the day. Her legs pushed against the covers in an effort to reach open air. However, she wasn't expecting her bed to move. The thing covering her head lifted itself, and instead of being greeted by the sight of her room, she found herself sitting on a cloud, right next to a bemused Princess Luna. Was I under Luna's wing?! "A shouting dragonequis does not wake you, but a simple rooster does?" the princess asked with a hint of a grin. "What do you mean, 'dragonequis'?" Fluttershy asked. Memories of the night before slowly came back as she became more and more awake. "I—" I spent the entire night leaning against her! "Luna, I'm so sorry! I only wanted a little nap, I didn't mean to—" Oh, she probably thinks I'm really strange, now... "It is of no importance. I shall accompany you to your house before I take my leave." Soon, the two mares landed in front of the modest cottage. "Um, I... thank you, for letting me slee—" "Do not mention it," Luna interrupted. She fought back a yawn of her own. "I am happy that you trusted me to stand guard over your slumber." "'Stand guard'... Luna, do you mean that you didn't sleep at all?!" "Somepony had to make sure that we didn't fall," the princess said, her expression wooden. "I will be fine—" "No, no, no! I can't just—you come inside, right now! You need to get some sleep!" "But I—" "No 'buts'! You can use my shower, then you are going straight to bed!" "...Yes ma'am..." muttered the cowed alicorn. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Ten minutes later, a squeaky-clean Luna walked outside to find her pegasus friend feeding the animals. "Luna, you should be in bed!" she said, but the princess paid her no attention. Instead, her attention zeroed in on the little critters. Squirrels, rabbits, chipmunks, mice... "So..." she said in a dreamy voice, "...so... cute!" With that, she was off, chasing them down. Predictably, the animals fled the crazy, charging pony. "No, please do not run! Your princess merely desires cuddles! Cuddles, I say!" She halted in her tracks when one of the squirrels stopped and turned. Its face had a sour look on it, but that was nothing compared to its glowing-red eyes. "Chase us at your own peril, fleshling," it growled in a demonic voice. "Wha—wha—" Luna stuttered. The squirrel drew itself up tall, nearly reaching a full foot's height. "Foolish creature of bone and blood, you understand not the forces with which you meddle." "De—Demon squirrel!" the princess roared; her warrior's instincts took over. "We shall squash thee and cleanse this world of thy taint!" She lunged forward and brought a hoof down heavily. However, the creature easily darted to the side, avoiding the attack. "Stand—" *smash* "—still—" *crash* "—and—" *crunch* "—embrace—" *bam* "—thine—" *whack* "—end!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Fluttershy!" called Rarity as she came down the road to the little cottage. "Good morning!" Her cheery expression faltered when noticed Princess Luna leaping repeatedly at a squirrel. "Um... is the princess alright?" "Oh, she's just playing with Phineas," Fluttershy replied. "They look like they're having a lot of fun, don't they?" "Stop moving so that We may destroy thee!" "Heh heh, fun, playing..." the unicorn chuckled. "Right..." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After ten minutes of "playing", Phineas darted to Fluttershy and climbed onto her back. "Fluttershy! Beware, that is no normal fuzzy critter!" Luna cried. "Oh no, Phineas is very smart," the yellow mare replied, nuzzling him lightly. "I am the thing that goes bump in the night!" Phineas said. "Dost thou not hear him?!" the princess asked. "Hear what?" Rarity said curiously. "Never be alone." "Seriously, nopony else is hearing this?!" Fluttershy patted the dark mare on the back. "Luna, maybe you should get some sleep now..." "Your nightmares will be of me!" "Squirrel... what art thou?" "I am everything that you fear." "Yes, you're going to sleep right now." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Twilight, Pinky, and Applejack trotted towards Fluttershy's cottage, where they had been invited for a light lunch. "Sorry Pinky, but I don't think there'll be anything sweet there," Twilight said apologetically. "Nuh uh, that's impossible!" "With Fluttershy, it's usually salads and tea." The earth pony brandished a sack of her own food. "Ah gotta eat somethin' more fillin' than that if Ah don't want to die of hunger, so Ah bring mah own vittles. Y'all can have some if ya want, Pinky." "C'mon you two, stop complaining!" the princess said. "It was nice of her to invite us, the least we can do is be grateful." "Ah didn't say Ah wasn't grateful..." "Yeah Twilight, it's not like we're monsters or anything—" "Wait, what's that?" Applejack hushed the other two ponies and pointed at something that was moving through the shadows towards them. It could almost be confused as a shadow itself, except that it acted on its own. Twilight immediately recognized the specter from the reports she had read. "Girls, get behind me," she said. "Hold on, if there's somethin' dangerous—" "I don't have time to explain!" Twilight snapped. "Get behind me, now!" The other two mares reluctantly obeyed. Fortunately, they got out of sight in the nick of time; the moment their faces were hidden from view, the specter opened its eyes. Bright-green orbs locked with the alicorn's, and immediately it attempted to fight its way in. This thing's definitely pretty strong, Twilight thought, but it's not nearly as bad as when Luna broke my barrier. She easily repelled it, then charged up a spell that would hopefully capture the monster. However, right as she cast her dweomer, the specter shot towards Fluttershy's cottage at a surprising speed. "Stick with me, Pinky, Applejack, and whatever you do, do not look into its eyes!" Pinky giggled while they ran. "Haha, you said 'doodoo'!" The three mares burst through the front door and gasped; Rarity stood bravely before the creature. "Rarity!" Twilight cried. "Don't look into its—" She was surprised when her unicorn friend stared straight into its gaze. Suddenly, as if burned, the specter fled from her, back outside towards the chicken coop. Just before it reached the safety of the surrounding trees, Applejack slammed a bucket down over top of it, and Pinkie contributed by dropping a brick on the bucket in order to weigh it down. Muffled thumps came from within as the specter attempted to push its way free, but the makeshift prison wouldn't be budged. "Phew," Applejack exhaled. "The varmint almost got out of Dodge." "AJ, Pinkie... I'm sorry for shouting at you back there," Twilight said. "Nah, don't worry 'bout it." "We both realized it probably had something to do with mind control powers!" Pinkie said, waving her hooves in the air dramatically. "What was all that commotion?" Fluttershy cried. Both she and Rarity cantered out to join their other friends. "That monster that Luna's been looking for just tried to attack Twilight," the pink pony explained. "Yeah, but..." Twilight wore a troubled expression. It sure was strange, the way it ran... "'Yeah, but' what?" Rarity asked. "...Nothing. I'm sure it's nothing." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Luna's dreams were filled with images of dancing Discords, each one sporting a sign that said "I TOLD YA SO!" "Um, Luna..." The princess stirred slightly, but didn't wake up. Something nudged her in the side. "Sleepyhead, it's time to get up..." "Nnnnhn..." she moaned in protest. "Go 'way, Tia... 'nother ten minutes, We beg of thee..." "Luna, it's important. We caught the specter." That got the alicorn's attention. Within a moment, she was out of bed and on her hooves. "You what?" she exclaimed to Fluttershy, the pony who had been trying to wake her. "It's outside. Applejack and Pinkie trapped it under a bucket." Luna's expression could only be described as wooden. "...What." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "What." Now that Luna stood outside and could inspect the specter's improvised prison, it seemed even more ridiculous than ever. "You trapped an extremely dangerous monster. With a bucket." "And a brick!" Pinkie added. "This is a creature that not even the entirety of the palace guard could apprehend, and all you needed was a bucket." "Don't forget the brick!" "Well, it was sittin' right there, so Ah just plopped it right on top of the little critter, and that was that." "You keep forgetting to mention the brick!" Luna smacked a hoof against her forehead. "A bucket... why didn't I think of that?" she said sarcastically. "That brick was important!" "Alright, Twilight, let us take care of it before it finds a way out," the princess said. "Everypony else stay back. Twilight, when I say so, you lift the bucket. I shall make certain that this specter troubles nopony ever again." As soon as both ponies found their places, she said, "Now!" Twilight threw the bucket aside and Luna immediately torched the area with a gout of flame. However, as soon as the smoke cleared, everypony could tell that the monster was long gone. "It burrowed out," Rarity said, pointing at a hole in the scorched ground, through which the specter had presumably escaped. "At least we know it can be captured," Luna said. "But now we must make a plan. You said that it was after Twilight?" "Yeah, it went straight for her," Applejack said. "Then it's a good thing I taught you how to protect your mind." "Oh yeah! Speaking of which," Twilight said, "Rarity, how did you manage to fight it off?" "I'm allowed to know how to shield my mind too, aren't I?" the unicorn said indignantly. "Well, yes, but why would you know how to do that in the first place?" "If you must know, when I was a filly, some colt used a spell to read my thoughts, then used what he learned to spread rumors about me. Ever since, I've made certain that nopony can get inside my head unless I let them." "I have determined what our best course of action is," said Luna, rejoining the conversation. "Since Twilight and I are the specter's targets, we should separate ourselves from the rest of you. That way, none of you will be in any danger of possession when it attacks again." "Wait, what makes y'all so certain that thing'll go after you two again?" "It's clear that it wants an alicorn body, so it makes sense that we're the ones it will approach." All of the others broke out in argument at once, but Twilight silenced them. "I—I think Luna's right," she said hesitantly. "But you'll be in danger!" Fluttershy protested. "We can help you!" "Actually, you will help more by avoiding the specter completely," Luna said. "If it were to possess one of you, it could use that leverage to its advantage." "Still—" "C'mon, Fluttershy, we'll be fine. Look, Luna'll be there! If anyplace is safe, it's next to her!" Another shock of jealousy ran through the pegasus's body at the thought of the alicorns spending time together, just the two of them. "But... I don't want you to get hurt..." "Everything will be alright," the dark princess assured her. "As soon as we have dealt with the specter, we shall return here. Is that agreed?" "Fine, do whatever you want!" Fluttershy said in a very rare show of anger. "I don't care!" She felt a twinge of regret as an expression of pain crossed Luna's face, but right at that moment, the pegasus couldn't find the willpower to deal with it. "Very well," the princess said. "We'll... we'll just be going, then." "Fluttershy, wasn't that a bit rude?" Rarity asked, as soon as the two alicorns departed. "I just... I don't like this at all." But what is it that I don't like? Luna and Twilight being in danger, or the fact that they get to spend so much time together... alone... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ An hour later, Twilight and Luna stood in the middle of a large field. They could see for at least twenty yards in each direction, so there was no way that the specter could sneak up on them. "If it truly desires to possess one of us, then the only way it can do so is by confronting us here," Luna said confidently. Twilight began to fidget. "Um, Luna... there's something that's been bothering me." "What is it?" "When I ran into the thing earlier, I'm not actually totally sure that it was really after me." Luna felt a spike of dread plunge into her back. "What do you mean?" she asked. "Well, um... it's kind of a stretch, but..." "Twilight, it's very important that you tell me what you're getting at." "It's just that, after it failed to take control of my mind, wouldn't the best plan be to escape back into the shadows? But instead of that, it tried to get into Fluttershy's house, like it was going after something else..." "You mean, the pony it really wanted was inside." "It's possible." "It could have been after me," Luna mused. "I was inside and asleep, after all." Then something even more frightening occurred to her. This probably didn't happen... But what if the specter was there last night, listening in? What if it heard me admit *that* to Discord? If so, then it knows... "Oh, *yay!*!" she cursed loudly, causing Twilight to jump. "Follow me to Fluttershy's house! I have erred greatly!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Why can't I stop feeling jealous? Fluttershy wondered as she went around the house. She made the motions of performing her daily chores, but her heart wasn't truly in it. She wouldn't be interested in a simple pony like me anyway. Twilight's far better for her... she's prettier, smarter... She absent-mindedly poured the dog food into a bowl and placed it on the ground. And they're so much closer, anyways. Always going off with each other. Behind her, something shifted, making a light scraping noise. "Your ssadness... Sssmells deliciouss." When Fluttershy spun around, she found herself gazing straight into a pair of horrifying, green eyes. Author's Note Whenever life gets you down, just remember: All you need is ~~love~~ a bucket, and a brick.
Ch 10: In Which Luna Despairs, the Elements Fail, and a New Challenger Appears"Hurry, Twilight!" Luna shouted. "We must make haste!". "Sorry!" the other alicorn apologized, panting hard. "I'm trying...*gasp*... my best!" Finally, after what seemed like hours to the desperate Luna, they landed at the cottage. The dark princess smiled when she saw that everything was as it should be, but her feelings of relief immediately vanished as Rarity appeared, a panicked look on her face. "I was just leaving a note for you!" she said frantically. "Fluttershy—that thing got Fluttershy! Her eyes were green, and her voice wasn't normal, and—and—she just flew off!" "Which way?" Luna's body grew darker by the second; her tone of voice and expression assured everypony that now was not the time to hinder her. "That way," Rarity said, pointing west. The princess spread her wings and, with a single powerful stroke, shot off without even saying farewell. "I knew it! I knew it was after somepony else!" Twilight prepared to follow Luna, but first turned to her unicorn friend. "I'm going to follow her. You should stay here, just in case Fluttershy comes back." "But I—" Rarity paused mid-argument. "I understand. Please, bring them both back!" "Don't worry, she'll be alright." And then Twilight, too, was gone. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ An observing pony would have only seen a blur as Luna pursued the thing that had taking her Fluttershy. My Fluttershy? she thought with a mental chuckle; she brushed the moment of levity aside and pushed herself even harder. How could I have been so stupid? I should have stayed with my friends... to protect them if that thing went after them! And look what happened! Finally, she spied a tall cliff, upon which stood the canary-yellow pony that Luna sought. Clods of dirt flew as the alicorn's hooves skidded on the ground. "Hello again," the specter snarled through its host's mouth. "Release that pony this instant," Luna commanded. Her mane flowed directly upward, taking the appearance of a bright blue bonfire that licked angrily at the sky. "No, I don't think I ssshall." Fluttershy's legs began to walk backwards, taking her towards the edge. "Stop!" It means to take her off the cliff! "Take... We shall allow thee to enter Our mind. That is thy goal, is it not?" "You think me a fool?" It let out a hissing breath. "I'm aware that you can ssstill repel me, after I leave thisss body and before I enter yoursss." The heels of the yellow mare's back legs hung over the edge—one more step, and she would be gone. Luna moved to her last resort and lashed out with magic, hoping to catch the pegasus and drag her back onto firmer ground. However, the specter clearly expected this, because it instantly jumped backwards. Gravity took effect and Fluttershy fell. "No!" The princess was off the cliff in an instant, straining herself to catch up to the falling mare. Her panic increased when the specter grinned evilly and flapped the pegasus's wings, speeding up its own descent. No, no, no! I'm not going to make it! She's going to die right in front of me! As Luna's spirit broke, so too did the integrity of the spell that kept her thoughts safe from intrusion. The monster sensed her moment of despair right as it happened. Its green eyes shot open and bore into the defeated mare's, allowing it to finally take what it deserved. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Normally, Rainbow Dash didn't travel this far away from Ponyville, but for some reason, she felt particularly adventurous that day. With the wind blowing through her mane, she admired the surrounding scenery as it shot by underneath her. Just as she contemplated whether or not she should head home for a bit of shut-eye, she noticed something very small and very yellow falling quickly, with another thing akin to a blue bullet falling after it. She strained her eyes and saw that the "things" were Fluttershy and Luna. Now, Rainbow wasn't the most mathematically inclined pony ever born, but anything even slightly related to flying, such as falling, was second nature to her. Thus, she could easily tell that Luna wasn't going to be able to get to Fluttershy in time to save her. Time for the Dashinator to shine! the pegasus thought, putting all of her effort into reaching her friend before it was too late. It's going to be close... The blue mare pushed herself even harder, straining for just a few extra inches. Just as Fluttershy was about to hit the ground, Rainbow got her forelegs under the falling mare and pulled her in close. Unfortunately, even though the athletic pegasus strained to stay airborne, her friend's downward momentum pushed them both into the ground. In order to protect the less-hardy pony from further injury, Rainbow made sure that she was the one hitting the ground instead of her delicate cargo. They rolled for a number of yards before finally coming to a stop. For her part, Luna managed to spread her wings and drastically slowed her own descent, but she still landed heavily. She skidded a distance on her stomach before coming to a complete halt. "Yeowch, that's going to hurt tomorrow," Rainbow muttered, surprised that she had gotten away with only bruises. The princess, on the other hand, didn't look nearly as well. She had risen almost immediately and staggered around with a drunken gait. "Hey, Luna, you alright?" "Gah!" the princess gasped, head turning to look at the other mare. "Stay... away!" Her eyes flashed green, then back to white. Her gaze snapped over to where Fluttershy lay—at first the pegasus was immobile, but Luna's eyes widened and teared up when the yellow mare stirred and gave a quiet groan. "She's fine...I am gladduungh!" Another burst of green light shot forth from her skull, and she spread her wings to take flight. Luna wobbled in mid-air, seemingly unable to maintain a stable flight, but it wasn't enough to ground her. Soon, she was out of sight. "Fluttershy! Rainbow!" Twilight had finally caught up, panting heavily. "Are you two alright?" "I'll live, but Luna didn't look so good." "That thing... it got her, didn't it?" the purple alicorn asked with a frown. "What thing?" "That... specter thing, that she was hunting. Did her eyes turn green?" Rainbow recalled the emerald light that had emitted from Luna's head. "For a little bit, yeah, but they changed back to normal." "Just a little bit?" Twilight put a hoof to her chin as she pondered what that meant. "Could she be fighting it? I guess if anypony could, it would be her." "Uuungh..." Fluttershy groaned, eyes slowly opening. "What..." "Fluttershy!" The two other mares crowded around her and began to ply the groggy pony with questions. "Does anything hurt? Are you alright?" "I... I think I might have a bruise on my back...And my head hurts..." She glanced at Twilight and frowned. "Um, sorry if I'm wrong, but weren't you with Luna? Where is she? And... where are we?" Rainbow sighed and rubbed her forehead wearily. "You better sit down; you aren't gonna like this." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Rarity paced back and forth outside Fluttershy's cottage, nervously wondering what could be taking so long. It's been nearly an hour... I hope they're alright! Suddenly, three specks appeared in the sky, growing larger by the second, and the unicorn breathed a sigh of relief at the sight of her three friends. However, her relaxation fizzled when the specks approached and became recognizable—Rainbow had joined them, and Luna was missing. "Fluttershy!" As soon as they landed, Rarity threw herself forward and hugged the pegasus tightly. "I thought I'd never see you again!" "Don't cry over me," Fluttershy said in a subdued voice, patting the crying mare on the back awkwardly. "I'm not worth worrying about anyway..." "Why do you say that, dear? And also, where did Luna go? She's alright, isn't she?" A dark mood filled the atmosphere, and Rarity realized that she had said something wrong. Fluttershy looked at the ground and walked away slowly. "We think Luna gave herself up to save Fluttershy," Twilight said in a soft voice. "By the time Rainbow and I were there, the specter was already in Luna's head, and I can't think of any other reason for how it could get past her defenses." "And the poor dear blames herself, I suppose," Rarity said. "Very well, I know what I must do." The unicorn marched over to where Rainbow and Fluttershy stood. "Hey, cheer up, it's not your fault—" the blue pony began, but she didn't get a chance to finish. "Fluttershy, right now is no time to be feeling sorry for yourself." The two pegasi looked at Rarity in shock. "If you really must, then there will be time for that later—after we've saved Luna." "But... but I—" "Tell me, do you really think moping is going to help her?" "I—I don't know what to do!" Fluttershy cried. "What can little, weak Fluttershy do to help if even Luna wasn't strong enough?!" "Howdy!" shouted Applejack, trudging down the road with a wooden chest in tow, Pinkie close behind. "Rarity, I got them!" "Here's what you can do," Rarity said. "You can come with us. While you were gone, I sent Applejack and Pinkie to acquire the Elements of Harmony from the library. They saved Luna once before, so there's no reason they can't do it now." Twilight gave an impressed whistle. "That was very insightful of you." "Yes, I can be rather resourceful, can't I?" The unicorn flipped her mane over to the other side of her neck. "What do you say, Fluttershy? You can apologize to her when she's safe and sound, can't you?" Fluttershy blinked the tears out of her eyes and let a tremulous smile spread across her face. "Yes, I can... thank you." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ In a small copse of trees, Luna fell to the ground, panting heavily. "Get... out of... my head..." she gasped. "But I find that I quite like it here," the specter said through her mouth. A green haze encroached on her vision, and she could tell that the battle would soon be over. "I...said... get out!" A final burst of willpower nearly forced the monster from her head, but as Luna's temporary surge left her, she knew that she had lost her last chance. "You lossse..." Her eyesight slowly faded, until she knew nothing but darkness. "YESsss!" the specter screamed in triumph. The princess's body stood tall, at last fully under its new master's control. "Now nothing sshall stand againsst me!" A small bolt of lightning suddenly fell from the sky and struck Luna on the back, causing the creature to hiss in pain. Its head snapped around to look up, where it saw the rapidly retreating Twilight Sparkle. "Little fool... I sshall end you for thisss!" In the blink of an eye, it was in fast pursuit. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Twilight made a quick landing back at the cottage, where her friends finished the preparations. "Is everypony ready?" she asked. A number of affirmatives rang out from their various hiding places. "Alright, good, because here she comes!" Along the way, the specter had pulled a boulder out of the ground, and now lobbed it in Twilight's direction. The projectile soared towards her at a high velocity, but missed when the young alicorn jumped to the side. The dark princess landed awkwardly and pawed at the ground. "To challenge my might all by yoursself..." the beast taunted. "Brave, but sstupid." "Luna..." Fluttershy emerged from behind a tree and trotted forward to stand beside Twilight. "Luna, can you hear me?" "Your dear princessss is sssleeping, I fear..." The pegasus ignored it. "Please, try to fight it. Come back to us." The specter took a step forward, but noticeably trembled. "Sstop that! I'll destroy you where you sstand!" "Good job," Twilight whispered to her friend. A purple aura enveloped her horn as she stealthily began to cast a spell. "Keep her occupied, for just a little longer." "I—I know it's my fault, that you're like this," Fluttershy continued in a quiet voice. "But please come back. I'm sorry, for everything. I won't be jealous anymore, I promise!" The specter stumbled and nearly fell to the ground; the green in its eyes faded. "Fl—Fluttershy?" came Luna's normal voice. "Luna!" "Ok, it's ready!" Twilight said. "Now!" She completed her spell, and a vast number of magical tendrils flew out of the ground at Luna's feet. They wrapped themselves around her and tightened, holding her down. The beast roared in fury as the princess's eyes once more became fully green. Pinkie leaped from a tree and landed on top of a giant cannon, that had been somehow concealed until that very moment. Her expression was completely blank—it was the one she had worn immediately after returning from the mountains. "Parate..." she started calmly, "...PARTYCANNONBLASTTOTHEFACE!" Her face grew wild as she pressed a large button and a massive wad of pink gum slapped onto the restrained princess. "The Elements!" Twilight cried. "Hurry, before she gets free!" The rest of the element-bearers galloped into the open and gathered around Luna. The elements began to glow, a clear signal that the ritual had begun. "IGNORANT FLESH-BAGSsss!" the specter shrieked. Luna's horn unleashed a wave of crackling power that vaporized both Twilight's spell and Pinkie's gum. "I have all of Luna'ss memoriesss! You think I don't know how to defeat the Elementss?" One moment, the alicorn stood still, shaking the remnants of the cannon's payload from her mane. The next, she loomed tall over Applejack. "You cannot usse them if one of you is misssing, can you?" The dark princess placed her horn against Applejack's forehead; a burst of magic blinded all of the ponies, and when they could see again, Applejack had disappeared. "What did you do with her?!" Pinkie demanded angrily. She quickly reloaded her party cannon. "Fear not, I merely sssent her sssomeplacce where ssshe cannot interfere." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The first thing Applejack felt was a cold wind that made her cheeks feel numb. She opened her eyes and looked around, instantly recognizing the surrounding buildings. She had been sent to the Crystal Empire. Almost as instantly, she noticed that she also stood on top of the highest spire of the Crystal Empire's castle, nearly three-hundred yards in the air. "Oh, horseapples." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "You ssshould not worry about your friend. Insstead, conccern yoursselvesss with your own livess." The specter stalked forward slowly, a charge building up on Luna's horn. However, right as it appeared ready to release a devastating spell, the princess's legs hesitated, then rooted themselves to the ground. "Curssse you, you annoying cow!" the monster yelled. "It's Luna again!" Twilight shouted. Like before, the alicorn's eyes cleared. "I...can hold it back..." Luna gasped through clenched teeth. "...But only for a few more minutes...run... get away!" "Can't you use your mind-shield spell to get rid of the specter?" Rarity asked. "Nnn...no, not while...nngh... it has itself wrapped... around my very being..." "We won't abandon you!" Fluttershy said passionately. "She's right!" Rainbow added. "We'll do whatever it takes to get that thing out!" "Then... run..." the princess repeated. "Get... my sister..." "Actually... that's not a terrible idea," Twilight admitted. "Twilight?!" "Think about it," the younger alicorn said. "Without Applejack, we can't use the elements, and I'm sure as hay not strong enough to beat Luna. Princess Celestia might be our only hope." The rest of the mares grudgingly agreed, and almost as one, they turned and dashed away—only Fluttershy paused before leaving. "Luna..." she said sadly, "...I'll save you. Don't worry." "Thank... you... Oh, and I... heard what you said... before..." "What do you mean?" "When you said you were... ah, I cannot keep this up for much longer... You said you were sorry for everything." "Oh, u-um, that, well, um—" "I have never once—gah!— felt that there was anything for which you should be sorry." "Luna..." The princess's eyes flashed green, and her body began to tremble violently. "Flee! The beast is overtaking me once more!" With that said, Fluttershy followed her friends, vowing to never give up until Luna was free again. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Two hours later, the element bearers, minus Applejack, congregated at the train station. "Here's what I think is the best plan," Twilight told her friends. "While you four go to Canterlot and speak with Princess Celestia, I'll hunt down Applejack." "Why are you going alone?" Rainbow asked. "Two of use would cover a lot more ground, right?" "I have a spell that'll point me right to her," the alicorn replied. "It won't take me very long at all." Rarity raised a hoof to indicate that she had a query. "What should we tell the princess when we get there?" "Good question!" The other mares rolled their eyes as Twilight fell into "teacher mode". "Tell her everything you know, then help her think up some type of strategy. She'll definitely know what to do." A loudspeaker overhead announced an arrival. "Now arriving, the Crystal Express! All passengers leaving for Canterlot, please wait until the train comes to a complete stop before boarding!" The train pulled in and halted with a loud hiss. "This is your train, girls," Twilight said. "Don't worry, I'll catch up as soon as I get AJ!" "Be careful," Fluttershy said, worry etched into her face. "Last time we split up, it—it didn't go very well." "Well then, y'all better not be splittin' up again, Ah reckon." The train door had opened to reveal Applejack, standing confidently with a smug expression. "Applejack!" "You're alright!" "How did you get here?" "Whatever spell that thing used on me sent me straight for the Crystal Empire," the earth pony explained. "And Ah figured, as long as Ah was in the neighborhood, Ah might as well recruit some help." A second pony, appearing as would a goddess from the days of yore, stepped forth from inside the train car and cracked her neck in preparation. Light-pink hooves crashed down onto the platform, sending a chill down everypony's spine. "I'm here to kick flank and rule some crystal ponies," Princess Mi Amore Cadenza said with a wicked grin, "and I'm all out of crystal." Elsewhere in Equestria, somepony was playing a sick guitar riff. Author's Note Weedly weedly deedly weedle weedle deedle weedlydeedlydeedly waaaaaaaaaooo *Smashes guitar on stage* *Leaves* This is Randy the Guitarist, and this... is his subplot.
Ch 11: In Which Celestia Takes Charge, Discord Presents a Plan, and Fluttershy Confesses"Cadance, what are you doing here?" Twilight asked, jaw hanging open. "What about Shining Armor? What about the Crystal Empire?" "Nice to see you, too," the pink pony said while chuckling. She threw a foreleg over Twilight's back companionably. "Don't worry, I left the Empire in capable hooves; it won't fall apart overnight. And as for Shining..." "I'm right here..." the unicorn in question said as he stumbled out of the train. "Oh geez, I don't feel too good..." "You still get motion sickness?" Twilight asked. "I thought you got over that during your military training." "If only I was that lucky... urp!" He dashed off, green-faced, to find a trash can. "Applejack told me about Luna on the way here. Oh, and I sent notice to Aunt Celly, too, right before I left," Cadance added. "She should be meeting us at your house, Twilight." "See, everything's going to be okay," Rarity muttered to Fluttershy, poking her in the side. "We've got the three other princesses here, ready to help! What can go wrong?" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The specter paced back and forth in the cavern that it had habitated for its entire existence, deep in the Everfree Forest. It was here that it would finally enslave this new body to its will, thus ensuring that Luna would no longer have the capability to wrest control away. "I would have tasssted their blood," it hissed. "If only you hadn't interfered." It knew that Luna couldn't hear its words—she was unconscious once more, and thus unable to see, hear, or feel anything. "Well well well, you're doing alright for yourself, I see." The possessed alicorn immediately jumped to the ready, a spell charged on her crackling horn. "Who daress to—M-Masster!" At the sight of Discord, the specter dropped to the alicorn's knees. "I'm impressed that you managed to survive for all these years," the dragonequis said, "and I really must ask, how did you manage to take possession of our dear Princess Luna?" "It wass not eassy," the creature replied. "But you created me to be clever, and I ussed that clevernesss well." "Well, now that this cow has been rendered inert, I'm going to make sure she's never a threat to us again. If you don't want to disappear from Equestria forever, I suggest you vacate her oh-so-thick skull." "Of coursse..." it said. Suddenly, a line of dark magic whipped out and wrapped itself around Discord's neck. "Or perhapss not." The eldritch god of chaos turned his body to liquid, allowing him to easily slip free. "Aw, you figured it out..." he whined. "How'd you know?" "I knew from the beginning! How many timesss musst I tell you foolss—I have all of thiss meat-ssack'sss memoriess! Of courssse I would know that you're a traitor of your own causse!" "You know, your kind really was one of my favorites..." Discord reached out and grabbed hold of the magical whip, and the glowing aura began to be pulled up his arm. The specter gasped in shock as it felt a drain on its energy. "But you're starting to get on my nerves, and that I just cannot abide." "I SSSHALL DESSTROY YOU!" it roared, dispersing the whip into nothingness. "Farewell, my former massster!" "I think I'm beginning to feel unwelcome," Discord said with a sad expression. He held out his arm, which had retained the magical energy he had sucked from Luna. "Oh well... at least I got what I came for. See you soon!" He exploded in a shower of chocolate milk that drenched the alicorn's body, making the specter shake with rage. "Yess, sssee you ssoon..." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "The best option is to find a way to use the Elements of Harmony," Princess Celestia said to the assembled ponies. "Fighting with Luna is dangerous for all of us, her included." "But we already tried the Elements!" Rainbow said. "That monster said that it knew how to deal with them!" "Yes, but you didn't have Cadance and me there to protect you, did you?" "Hey, don't forget about me!" Shining Armor added. Celestia acknowledged him with a nod. "Indeed. With the three of us keeping you safe, there should be no way for the specter to interfere this time." "I wouldn't be so certain." A *pop* heralded the arrival of Discord, whose arm shimmered with a familiar dark-blue light. "That thing's almost half as smart as I am, which is no small amount, if I do say so myself." "Oh, good. Discord's here," Twilight said, slowly twirling a hoof in the air. "Hip hip hooray." "Instead of being critical, why not make your own contributions?" Cadance asked him. "If you know the enemy so well, then surely you have some idea of what we should do." "I do, and don't call me Shirley." The rest of the room stared at him in blank confusion, except for Pinkie, who dropped to the ground and laughed her flank off. "I'm surrounded by yokels..." the dragonequis muttered. "I have taken the liberty of visiting our poor captured Wuna and stealing a portion of her power. Not much, mind you, but enough for what I'm planning." He glanced around as if looking for something before walking into the kitchen. "Hey, what are you doing?!" Twilight demanded when she heard him begin to rummage through the pots and other assorted kitchen tools. "Aha! This will do nicely." He held up a frying pan. The energy that he had stored in his arm transferred itself into the heavy, iron implement. "If the rest of you lovely, immortal mares would be so kind as to apply your own magic..." "What exactly is your idea?" Celestia asked. "And why do you need our input?" "You ponies and your explanations! 'Here's how we do this', and 'What will we need to do that?' Fine. I'm constructing a weapon that we can use to force the specter out of its host." "That's good enough for me," Cadance said, trotting over. Before the others could protest, she placed her horn up against the pan, and sent a jet of magic shooting into it. "You're up to something," Twilight said suspiciously. "I'm always up to something! However, this time, it's something that's not going to make all of you miserable! Probably." "Twilight," Celestia said, coming up to stand beside her former pupil, "I have come to trust Discord. He has proven, to me at least, that he is a being that we can depend on." "Seriously, did you have to say it like that? You're going to make me puke..." "Wait, Princess..." the youngest alicorn started, but she knew that she had lost the debate. "Fine." She trotted over and, almost violently, shot a jolt of her own power into the cooking implement. "You happy?" "Painfully so." The only one left to contribute was Celestia, who repeated the other princesses' actions. "And... it... is...finished!" Discord said as he brandished it above his head. "Duh duh duh duuuuuuuuuuh!" sang Pinkie, earning more than one curious look. Fluttershy walked forward and tugged lightly on Discord's arm. "Um... so, how does it work?" "What, this?" the dragonequis asked, gesturing to the magical pan. "Oh, it's a very complicated piece of equipment. Not just anypony can be trusted to wield it." "Discord..." Twilight growled. "Oh fine, Miss 'I-Don't-Know-How-To-Relax-and-So-I-Like-To-Yell-At-Disc-" "Discord!" "See what I mean? Alright, using this thing's so easy that even the rainbow-haired one can handle it." "Hey!" "You just bonk 'er on the head with the flat side, and out the little feller comes, leaving widdle Wuna safe and sound. And I think it goes without saying that I shall be doing the bonking." Twilight's mouth was already open with an argument prepared, but Celestia cut her off. "That is fine. You can be the one to use your magical...frying pan... but only if the Elements fail to exorcise the creature." "Aw c'mon, are you serious?" he asked with a pout. "Completely." "Whatever..." The dragonequis went into the corner to mope. "Well," Cadance said, clapping her hooves together, "it's getting dark outside, and I think we all need plenty of rest!" "What're y'all talkin' about? We should go after her now, while we still can!" "That would be a dreadful mistake," the white alicorn said serenely. "Even fighting Luna during the day will be difficult, but to do the same at night? When she's at her strongest? We wouldn't stand a chance." Rarity decided to chime in. "Applejack, dear, I understand your concern, but the princess's reasoning is sound. We should do this when we have the best chance of success, don't you think?" "Ah reckon... shoot, it just grinds on mah nerves, is all." The unicorn approached and spoke in a quieter voice. "Mine too, believe me. You're not the only one suffering, after all." She pointed at Fluttershy, who stood off to the side, staring blankly into space. "What's wrong with her?" Applejack asked. "I'm not completely sure, but the poor dear is taking this harder than the rest of us. We need to be strong for her sake, as well as Luna's." "Then let's go cheer her up!" The two ponies trotted over to their friend and set about raising her mood. "Hey, Twilight," Cadance called, "I'm sorry to impose, but could we all stay here tonight? It would be a lot safer if we stick together. Who knows what that thing will decide to do?" "Sure, that's fine by me! I'll just get my extra pillows and blankets..." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Fluttershy was deep in thought when she felt something poke her in the forehead. She came back to reality to find both Applejack and Rarity standing in front of her. "Finally!" the unicorn exclaimed. "We've been trying to get your attention for ages!" "If by 'ages' she means about ten seconds, then Ah reckon she's right. Anyhoo, how're ya holdin' up, sugarcube?" "I'm... I'm fine," Fluttershy said softly. "Just thinking." "What about?" "Um, nothing important." "Well, ya wanna play a game? Ah bet Twi's got somethin' stashed away around here..." "No thank you. Oh, b-but don't let that stop you from playing!" "Naw, that's alright." "To be honest," Rarity said, "we noticed that you've seemed particularly down during this whole ordeal. We only want you to be happier." "I don't think..." The pegasus audibly swallowed. "That's not something I can do right now." "Why in tarnation would ya think somethin' like that?" "Are you still blaming yourself for all of this?" The bluntness of the question had Fluttershy rocking back on her hooves. "N-no... Well, I mean, yes, but that's only part of it." "Then what's the rest? We're your friends, we can help with whatever the problem is!" Fluttershy clamped her eyes shut and shook her head. "C'mon, don't just bottle it up," Applejack said encouragingly. "It's good to get things like this off your chest." Again, the pegasus shook her head, shrinking back a bit. "You know that we won't judge you for anything." Rarity tilted the the shy mare's face up to force her into making eye contact. "Pleeeeeease?" "...Do you promise?" Fluttershy asked. "Of course we promise!" "Yup, it's a deal." "Do you really promise?" Applejack resisted the urge to roll her eyes. "You know me, Ah wouldn't lie 'bout somethin' like that. Or anythin' at all, now that Ah think about it..." "Trust me, nothing you say will make me think any less of you." "I... guess...*mumble*." "Sorry? I didn't catch that." Fluttershy's cheeks grew bright red as she repeated herself. "I think...I'm in love with Luna.." "One more time, sugarcube." "I SAID I THINK I LOVE LUNA!" Despite the low volume of her voice, it was so intense and so highly pitched that it cut through all of the idle chatter. Everypony immediately stopped talking and turned surprised gazes towards the pink-maned mare. "I'm—I'm sorry..." "Did... did you just say that you love Luna?" Rarity asked, wide-eyed. "U-um, um, I think... maybe...possibly... yes?" The unicorn held her silence for a second more before a humongous grin spread across her face. "Whahahaha!" she shrieked, pulling her friend into a tight hug. "That's simply fantastic! To have found... oh, I'm so jealous!" Cadance came prancing over and threw a glowing smile Fluttershy's way. "This means that it's extra important that we bring Aunty Lu home!" she said. "That's right!" Rarity stood up tall, as if to proclaim something. "We will not fail, for the sake of Fluttershy's feelings for Luna!" she cried. "You don't, um, have to—" "For the sanctity of love and caring!" the pink princess added as she similarly positioned herself besides Rarity. However, it was the moment when Rainbow came over to join them that Fluttershy knew that the situation couldn't be salvaged. "For a chance for Fluttershy to get to second base!" the blue mare shouted. A soft 'eep!' accompanied the poor pegasus as she fainted dead-away.
Ch 12: In Which Battle is Joined, Fluttershy is Saved, and Noggins are WhackedA hush fell over the forest as a mighty winged form took flight, its shadow cast on the canopy below by the early-morning sun. All of the creatures that lived amongst the trees, be they monstrous or miniscule, knew that this thing, flying overhead, was not an enemy to be trifled with. The specter felt their fear, and revelled in it. It had solidified its grip on Luna's mind, to the point where she likely wouldn't wake up even if freed from its insidious grasp. The alicorn's mouth spread wide in a wicked grin. "Now to do sssomething about thosse Element bearersss..." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "This should be far enough," Celestia said, eyeballing the distance between their chosen battleground and Ponyville. "Everypony knows what they're supposed to be doing, correct?" "Of course they do," Discord answered in a bored voice. "We've only been over it a billion times." "Make sure you keep your priorities straight." The princess pointedly ignored his sarcasm. "I don't want the Element bearers to be interrupted just because you would find it amusing to whack my sister on the head with a frying pan." "This is not just a simple 'frying pan'!" the dragonequis said. "I'll have you know, that I have given him a name!" "Oo, oo, what is it?" Pinkie asked. "Is it something like 'The Equalizer'? 'Cataclysm'?" Rainbow raised her hoof excitedly. "What about 'Ghost Slayer'?" "All of those are wrong." Discord brandished his fighting implement with pride. "I have named him, 'Steve'." "What?!" "I just don't get you sometimes," Twilight said, shaking her head. "Uh, that's because I'm Discord, Lord of Chaos and Entropy! Unpredictability is part of my shtick! Where have you been for the past two years?!" "Quiet! Here she comes!" Celestia flapped her wings and rose to meet her sister. "Guess we won't have to send anypony to get her, after all," Shining muttered. Twilight gathered her five friends near her. "We have to do this as quickly as we can," she said quietly. "The longer it takes, the greater the chance that one of us will get hurt." "Alright," they told her. "Creature, I will offer this once." Celestia's voice rang clearly in the morning air. "If you release my sister, then we can negotiate a peaceful solution for your continued existence." A sudden tendril of shadow magic flew out and wrapped itself around the sun princess's foreleg. It threw her downward with such speed and force that a wide crater formed around her when she hit the ground. "Princess!" "Aunty!" "You can take your 'peacceful ssolution' and sstick it up your *yay!*!" "Alright, go!" Twilight shouted. As soon as the Elements began to show signs of powering up, the specter turned and shot towards them. "Trying the ssame trick, are we?" it taunted. "Foolsss never learn—" A gigantic, pink, magical hammer swung in from the side, catching Luna in the ribs; the loud *thud* caused by the impact made everypony wince. "Woooooo yeah!" Cadance cheered, brandishing her weapon and swinging again. "Hahaha, take that! And that!" *Wham!* *Wham!* *Wham!* "Shining, what's wrong with Cadance?" Twilight asked apprehensively. "I've never seen her act so... bloodthirsty before." "Sometimes she gets like this, when something riles her up..." "Scary..." Without warning, another rope of dark magic wound its way quickly up the handle of the hammer, soon reaching the pink princess's head. It continued down and wrapped itself around her torso. "AH!" she yelped when it hurled her into the air. "Cadance!" Shining cried, clearly wanting to run to his wife's side. Unfortunately, he was duty-bound to guard the Element bearers. "Twily, hurry it up!" "I'm hurrying, I'm hurrying!" "Enough!" boomed a voice that nopony there except for Discord and Luna had ever heard before. From the crater where she had been thrown, an unscathed Princess Celestia emerged majestically. "Beast, come forth and test yourself against me!" With the Royal Canterlot voice powering her words, she appeared more terrible than could be imagined. Without hesitation, the dark alicorn launched herself forward, horn leading the way. She and Celestia clashed multiple times, but even though the sun princess put up an admirable fight, Luna slowly but surely was gaining the upper hoof. At last, Twilight felt the power of the Elements build inside of her. Finally! she thought as her body began to levitate and her eyes took on a white hue. The specter's eyes snapped over and it got a good look at what was about to happen before a white bolt of pure energy leaped from Twilight's horn, engulfing its target completely. "GAAAH!" the creature screamed in pain; its host flailed spasmodically from the attack's intensity. "Yeah, nice shot!" Rainbow cheered. "Something's not right..." the purple alicorn said. It's in pain, but shouldn't the specter have been forced out by now? Suddenly, she realized the trick. "It's an illusion! Look ou—" The ground erupted beneath them and the real Luna came forth. Her magic reached out and ripped the Elements of Harmony away from their bearers while, in the distance, the fake Luna faded into nothingness. The specter chuckled cruelly and brandished its plunder. "What hope do you have without thesse?" It threw the six pieces in six different directions, sending them all miles away. "Alright, the Elements have failed, so it's go time! Luna, prepare thy noggin!" A serpent snaked its way around Luna's torso—a serpent wielding a glowing frying pan named Steve. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Fluttershy's vision cleared as she stood and wiped the dirt from her eyes. "What... what happened?" she asked dazedly. She saw that of her friends, she and Twilight were the first ones to get up. "That thing took away the Elements," the purple alicorn informed her. "Discord's our only chance, now. In fact, you should try to wake up the other girls and get them away from here. From this point on, it's probably going to get too rough for you." "B-but... I can help..." Shining Armor leaped between the pegasus and their enemy. "You can help more by getting your friends to safety!" "O-okay..." She turned and shook Rarity's prone form. But after that... I'll be back, to do what I can! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The moment the specter saw Steve, its eyes narrowed, as if realizing the danger of being struck by the potent weapon. It sent a surge of electricity coursing through its body, giving Discord's constricting form a sizable shock. The dragonequis snarled and unwound himself. "It's not that easy to get rid of me," he said; a single lithe motion sent him diving underground. "You think I'm frightened?" the specter shouted. It leaped into the air, only to be slammed by the charging Celestia; Cadance contributed as well with a well-placed pair of kicks. "Now, Discord!" Celestia cried, moving away to give the dragonequis enough room to get a good swing in. A geyser of dirt and rock burst into the air as he shot upwards, weapon held at the ready. Unfortunately, the dark alicorn wasn't as stunned as she appeared; she flew backwards and released a barrage of magical bolts. "Pathetic," Discord laughed. His sinewy body easily slid this way and that to dodge the myriad projectiles. "Now, I can't say that I haven't ever dreamed of this moment..." His arm reared back to deliver the final blow. "Fluttershy!" Cadance called, and at the sound of his best friend's name, Discord's gaze snapped to where the pink princess was looking. One of Luna's fired bolts flew on a straight collision course for the yellow mare, and nopony was close enough to stop it. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After Fluttershy roused her friends back to wakefulness, she told them of Twilight's order to leave. However, when they reluctantly obeyed, she lagged behind the group, eventually turning back to return to the scene. Her eyes grew wide when Cadance and Celestia double-teamed the dark alicorn, and wider still when Discord made his move. She shrieked in concern for the dragonequis when Luna threw the magical projectiles, and breathed a sigh of relief when none of them hit him. Unfortunately, she saw that she would soon not be able to say the same for herself—one of the bolts that Discord had dodged was now coming right at her. "Fluttershy!" Cadance called in alarm. The pegasus knew that she was isolated from everypony else, and that she couldn't move quickly enough to get out of the way in time. Nopony had the ability to save her, but there was a certain dragonequis who did. A snap of his fingers teleported Discord into the attack's path in the blink of an eye, and before Fluttershy could protest his sacrifice, the crackling bolt struck him heavily in the chest. "Ouch!" he said, dropping to the ground with a groan. "Sheesh, she really doesn't like me!" "Are you al-alright?!" the pegasus asked frantically. "I suppose that I'm a bit out-of-sorts, yes. I know it seems counter-intuitive, but that tends to be what happens when you get hit with a stinkin' magical attack!" Up above, all of the alicorns joined the battle, Twilight included. The three each charged Luna in an effort to take her down before it was too late. However, as soon as they got close, the specter released a shockwave of dark energy that hit all three attackers at once; they fell out of the sky, energy spent. "This doesn't look good..." Discord muttered. "What can I do?" Fluttershy asked. "I'm still fine, I can help!" "Pssh, there's no way you—" He looked around again and saw that she was actually the only fit, winged pony left. "Alright, fine, you can help. Here." He held Steve out reluctantly, as if parting with it would be painful. "I can't just hit somepony! That's a terrible thing to do!" Discord gave her a wooden look. "I... but...How do you use it?" "How can you not know that?! You just whack her!" "But which side do I whack with?" "Oh, for cryin'... Look." The dragonequis pulled out a marker and scribbled something on the bottom of the pan. When he was finished, he revealed a hastily-drawn smiley face. "This is Steve's face. Say 'hello' to Steve's face. Bonk her with Steve's face. Got it?" "Okay...Hello, Steve's face..." She took the frying pan in both forelegs and slowly struggled to carry it with her into the sky. "I... I think... I think we're doomed," Discord said in a tone of finality. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Thisss iss amazing!" the specter crowed to its fallen foes. "Four of the mosst powerful beingss in exissstence, and I took them all down at once!" It caught sight of the little yellow pegasus who rose into the sky, frying pan in hoof. "Oh ho, you think to accomplisssh what your princesssess could not?" "I can't do this," Fluttershy mumbled to herself. "She's... she's too strong, and too big... and that thing's too mean..." "Fluttershy, go for it!" Twilight called, struggling to her hooves. "I know you can make it!" "Do it for love!" Cadance added. "Laaaaaaame!" Discord contributed. "That's right... If I just give up, then Luna will never be herself again." Her resolve hardened, and she raised Steve in preparation. "Alright, I'm ready!" Straining wings pushed her forward at her top speed, which in all honesty was fairly slow. "Hey, can she actually do this?" Cadance asked quietly. Twilight opened her mouth, but it was Celestia who answered. "As it stands, likely not. That's why we must lend her our assistance." Meanwhile, Fluttershy continued to approach her target. "I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry," she repeated quickly. "Squashing bugss iss no fun..." The specter was just about to blast the pegasus out of the sky when a handful of conjured sand burst into its face, courtesy of the fallen dragonequis. "GAH!" the beast screamed, blinded. Then, when it began to retreat, magical ropes from the other alicorns whipped up to hold the dark alicorn still. "Sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry," the yellow mare continued to chant. A trio of wicked-looking javelins materialised in mid-air, and Luna's magic propelled them unerringly at the approaching mare. "Eeep!" Flutterhsy squeaked in terror, thinking that she was finished this time for sure, but again, aid came unexpectedly. The javelins bounced harmlessly off of a shield conjured by an encouraging Shining Armor. "I got your back!" he shouted. "Just do what you need to do!" The pegasus lunged forward to close the remaining distance. "I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry..." At this point, Fluttershy was virtually on top of her target, too close for the ensnared alicorn to get away. Still blinded and thus unable to see its target, the specter whipped Luna's horn across in a desperate bid to save itself. It missed by a mile. "I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm so sorry..." The yellow mare brought Steve crashing against the side of Luna's head. "Sorry, I'm sorry!" *Booooooong!* The reverberations on the pan made a sound like a gong when it came into contact with the unfortunate alicorn's skull. Except for the fading remnants of sound caused by metal striking bone, the battlefield was wholly silent, with every pony and a single dragonequis looking on expectantly. Then, a loud sucking noise filled the air, and Fluttershy disappeared from sight. Both Luna and Steve fell lifelessly to the ground.
Ch 13: In Which Fluttershy is a Badflank Motherclopper, and Luna Meets an Old FriendFluttershy's eyes opened slowly to reveal... nothing; the darkness was absolute. She couldn't even see the ground beneath her hooves. "Hello...?" she called out hesitantly. The words echoed eerily around her. "Is anypony there?" "Thisss ssurprissess me," came a voice from the black void, causing the pegasus to shriek and flinch backwards. "You have ssomehow... made it to thisss placce... Well, let uss sssee what makesss you tick." Something pressed into Fluttershy's mind, and she felt it rummage through her thoughts. "W-wait! Don't do that! Those are—" Suddenly, she stood in Twilight's library, as if she had been there the entire time. Although there wasn't anypony else in the room with her, a series of loud, repetitive grunts informed the mare that she wasn't alone. "Twilight..." came a breathy voice that Fluttershy just barely recognized as Luna's. "Oh, Luna..." responded a pony that could only be the youngest alicorn. The words seemed to come from the library's bedroom, and judging from the nature of the atmosphere, the yellow mare didn't even want to go look. However, curiousity got the better of her, and she found her legs slowly taking her up the stairs. I... I hope this isn't what I think it is.... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Well, that was unexpected." Discord had regained enough strength to stand and approach the fallen Luna. "You didn't even know that it would do that?!" a red-faced Twilight Sparkle shouted. "Why would you let Fluttershy go if you were unaware of the properties of your own weapon?!" "Actually, I was talking about her getting in a good hit in the first place," the dragonequis said. "I mean, c'mon, did any of you really see that coming?" "Discord..." Celestia said, a warning clear in her voice. "What happened to Fluttershy?" He shrugged. "Honestly? I don't know. I thought that the specter would be forced out, but I guess she was forced in." "So... now what?" asked Cadance. "I suppose now she's going to have some sort of inner struggle, or whatever you kids like to do these days," Discord said. "Ah, but she'll be fine. I have full confidence in her." He pulled out a magazine and began to casually flip through its pages. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After minutes of creeping progress, Fluttershy finally reached the library's bedroom door and peeked in, only to have her heart break at the sight within. Twilight and Luna both lay in the bed, together...doing... The pegasus lurched away, closing the door quickly while trying her best to not cry. Why did it have to be Luna? she wondered. Out of all the ponies Twilight could have chosen, it had to be the one that I.... Suddenly, she realized the improbability of the scenario. No, that can't be real, the mare thought slowly. I'm sure that she and Twilight are just friends. And anyway, Luna was just possessed! She wouldn't do something like this so soon after— "Your outer weaknesss hidesss your true... well, nevermind. Time for a change of ssscenery." Fluttershy blinked in shock when the entire library melted and became indistinguishable before reforming into another familiar setting—her cottage's sitting room. She turned to take in her new surroundings, but was interrupted when a familiar dark-blue pony shoved her roughly. "Luna?" she asked. "What's going—" "Do not speak with me, worm." The harsh words instantly set the yellow mare rocking backwards. "Filth like you should just curl up in a corner and die." "Why—why would you say that?" Fluttershy said; tears streamed down her cheeks and dripped onto the floor. Calm down; this is just like before. She can't be— "You disgust me. Pitiful little bug, thinking that you can win the love of a goddess." "I-I-I'm sorry, it's not s-something I c-can help—" "Disappear and leave me be. I never want to see you again." Luna stalked outside and flew away. This is terrible... Fluttershy cried in her head, trying to get a grip on her emotions. I... this can't be real, I know this isn't real, but still... The mare's mind flew back and recalled all of the time the two ponies had spent together, and the pitiable expression on her face vanished. "No, Luna wouldn't believe things like that! Even to an enemy, she would never say anything so cruel. It's a lie!" The last sentence rang out with her full volume behind it. "Fine! If you cannot be broken with illussionsss, then how about fear?!" The room faded away and, once more, the pegasus stood in complete darkness, gazing into the black void; this time, however, a macabre face stared back. Its green eyes danced in deeply-sunken sockets. "BEHOLD YOUR DOOM!" "I'm—I'm not scared of you anymore," she said softly. "...What did you ssay?" "I said that I'm not scared of you anymore!" The specter screamed its fury. "I COULD RIP YOU APART IN AN INSssTANT!" "I've... I've been thinking, and I don't think you're strong enough to do that. It's true that using Luna's power, you can do just about anything, but the real 'you' is just a tiny little parasite." "You impudent—" "You're weak in real life, just like I am. I think I can understand you... just a little." "Sspare your sssympathy and prepare to die!" A pair of hands appeared, each bearing wicked claws. "Fine, if you're going to do it, then just get it over with!" Fluttershy said. Her anger, normally extremely slow to rise, began to spill over. "What are you waiting for? I'm right here!" For a second, she thought that her opponent was going to tear her to pieces, so terrible was the wrath displayed in its eyes. However, her misgivings vanished as another few moments passed and it made no moves to attack. When nothing happened, she released the breath that she had been holding. "Now, I just have to find Luna." "That'ss not ssomething I'll jussst let you do," the specter argued. "Hush, you. Now that I know your secret, nothing you say can change my mind. Luuunaaa!" The alicorn's name bounced off of walls that Fluttershy couldn't see. "Quit that!" "It's time to wake up, sleepyhead!" The pegasus felt something stir in the depths of the void. "I ssaid stop!" "Come back to us! We want to see you again!" Once again, an invisible presence shifted, as if agitated. "Wait, pleasse, don't do this!!" "Your friends are waiting for you, Luna. We miss you." The stirring became more pronounced, and something woke up. "I miss you." ...Fluttershy? A bright light filled the void, blinding Fluttershy, before she fell unconscious once more. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Twilight was just beginning to grow bored from waiting when a trickle of darkness streamed out of Luna's ear. "Princess Celestia!" she shouted, reaching out and snagging the escaping creature in a magical sphere before it could get further away. The specter beat itself against the inside of the prison, but it was finally captured. "Oo, nice catch!" Cadence said. Celestia examined the trapped creature closely. "I think we'll decide its fate at a later time. For now, we should take care of our brave pegasus friend..." "But Fluttershy's still gon—Fluttershy!" The yellow mare had appeared, lying on the ground next to Luna. Everypony present clustered around her, wanting to see if she was alright. However, the group scattered when the prone alicorn jumped to her hooves and grabbed her savior by the shoulders. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Fluttershy's mind swam through a sea of darkness as it struggled to reach the surface. Something's... moving? She heard muffled noises that grew progressively louder, until she recognized them as voices. "Are you alright?!" Are they talking to me? she wondered. "Just give her a little shake, I guess." The confused pegasus suddenly felt a lurching sensation as somepony wrenched her back and forth. Her eyes shot open, and she immediately identified the culprit as Luna. "St-o-o-o-p," the pegasus said in a wavering voice. "I'm awake!" "I see... My apologies." The alicorn averted her eyes and lightly blushed. "The keyword was 'little'," said Discord. It took a moment, but Fluttershy's memories soon came rushing back and she remembered all that had happened. There, sitting in front of her, was Luna, white-eyed Luna, her Luna. In an instant, the alicorn found herself bowled over by a hug that could have doubled as a flying-tackle. "You're okay!" the choked-up yellow mare managed to say, crying into the other pony's neck. "You're really, really okay!" "Yes, Fluttershy, I am. It is all thanks to you." Everypony else (and Discord) gave her a sour look. "A-and all of you, as well," she amended hastily. By this time, Fluttershy had saturated her friend's coat with tears. The princess wrapped her legs around the little pony and pulled her close. "I-I'm s-s-sorry," the pegasus said, looking up and seeing that Luna's face bore tear-streaks as well. "Yo-you're cr-cry-crying, because of m-me..." "Do not say that. I am *hic* not crying." Luna pushed Fluttershy's head back down. "*sniff* I never cry." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Ow!" "Sorry, sorry!" "Aw, does wittle Wuna's boo-boo hurt?" "Discord..." Now that Luna was safe, nothing further compelled Celestia, Cadance, or Shining Armor to remain in Ponyville. The two princesses departed almost immediately for their respective cities, Cadance accompanied by her complaining husband. "Please, let me walk! I don't wanna ride the train agaaaaain!" he cried while the pink mare dragged him away. Rarity and Applejack also took their leaves in order to see to their respective jobs. They congratulated Luna on her freedom before heading back to the town proper. So it was that Luna, Fluttershy, Twilight, Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, and Discord congregated outside of the timid pegasus's house while she pressed a bag of ice against the dark princess's cooking-implement-related injury. "I know that Cadance is responsible for these bruises," Luna said, pointing to the spot on her ribs where her niece had pummeled her with a hammer, "but which one of my fellow princesses inflicted this wound upon me?" She gestured at the welt on the side of her head. Discord pushed Fluttershy forward, who nearly fell over in an effort to apologize. "Actually, it was this little fireball, here. Whacked you right on the noggin with a frying pan. I'm so jealous..." "I cannot complain about it..." Luna gave the panicking mare a smile. "To have raised such a lump on my royal cranium, you must have quite the powerful swing. Do you take part in that one athletic activity which I have seen ponies play?" "Huh?" "The one on the diamond-shaped field." Pinkie raised her hoof. "Oh, oh! You mean baseball!" "Hah, she's totally right! Fluttershy, you should find a team to play for!" Rainbow said with a snicker. "I know you still want to get to second base!" She and the pink pony fell over laughing. "No—but—you—I—" Fluttershy's face glowed from the resulting blush, and Luna didn't help matters when she loudly proclaimed her intention to assist the pegasus in "reaching this so-called 'second base'". "She's so ignorant, it's almost not totally hilarious..." Discord muttered. Then, to Luna, he said, "I'm bored to tears being around all of you, so I'm going to bail before I have to lobotomize myself. I just need to say something, first." He coughed into his hand. "Luna, you are one of the stuffiest, dryest, grumpiest, least-interesting ponies that I have ever met, and yes, that even includes you, Sparkle." "Hey!" the purple mare protested. "However..." The dragonequis paused and sighed. "Being around you is just a teensy, tiny bit less awful than that thing that was renting out the chunk of solid bone you call a head." "Is that... a compliment?!" Luna asked incredulously. "No! It's not! I still think you're the worst! Whatever, I'm out of here." He disappeared in a cloud of eerie, laughing butterflies. "That was surprisingly nice of him..." she mused. "I shall never let him forget this! Ha, you have erred this time, Discord, you miscreant!" Suddenly, the princess felt something small and furry land on her back. "Luna, look!" Fluttershy exclaimed. "Someone's come to play with you!" Craning her neck, Luna's blood chilled when she saw that the thing on her back was a squirrel... and she knew which one, in particular. The demon critter's head slowly rotated in place until it rested at a very unnatural one-eighty degree angle, blazing-red eyes staring deep into her soul. "Fear will stalk you for the remainder of your miserable existence," Phineas informed the alicorn. "Away, darkspawn!" Luna cried, the force of her voice lifting the squirrel into the air. It landed gracefully on all fours. "In your final days, I will whisper terrible nothings in your decaying ears until you beg for death." "See how much they like each other?" Fluttershy said with a huge smile on her face. "Yeah, he's a cutie!" Pinkie contributed. The dark alicorn looked at all of them, aghast. "It is literally impossible that thou cannot hear this... this... demon's words!" Twilight trotted over and nuzzled the little squirrel lovingly. "Luna, are you alright?" she asked. "Fluttershy did hit you pretty hard, after all." "Yeah, everypony knows that squirrels can't talk," Rainbow said. "The words of portent are for you and you alone. When you finally feel safe, the shadows will consume you. They are always watching." "This is not over, squirrel," Luna promised, turning and stomping away indignantly. Author's Note And so it was that harmony was restored and the specter was defeated. However, a number of unresolved issues still remained. Will Luna and Fluttershy ever get together? Could Discord be crushing on Twilight? Will Phineas drive Luna to insanity? Is Shining Armor going to be sick on the train ride home? Will Twilight ever be useful? And, most importantly, what is Steve's ultimate fate? Tune in next time, on Ponyball Z!
(Extra) Ch 14: In Which the Plot Thickens, Luna is Asked to Dangle, and Sexual Jokes are MadeIn a move that surprised exactly zero ponies, Pinkie threw a party to celebrate Luna's liberation from the hands of the specter; everypony in town received an invitation to join in the festivities. Sugarcube Corner was filled to the brim with party-goers that evening as they all arrived to take part in one of Pinkie's lauded fêtes. The party stretched well into the night before it began to show signs of slowing down. One by one, tired ponies trundled out the door, waving farewell to their friends and thanking the pink earth pony for the invitation. Eventually, the event devolved into an "after-party" of sorts, consisting of the element bearers and Luna. That isn't to say that things got boring—in fact, Luna found herself having even more fun, now that it was just her and her friends. Rarity and Rainbow got into a slight argument over what a real "mare" was, but made up almost instantly. Applejack showed off her skills at juggling while Twilight and Luna lobbed increasingly heavy items her way. They all even managed to persuade Fluttershy to sing a little bit before she became too embarrassed to continue and clamped her mouth shut. For Luna, the hours blurred together in a wave of euphoria that made it seem as if it was unreal, a mere dream from which she would soon awake. At one point, in the throes of a sugar-high brought on from drinking a cup of Pinkie's infamous "death punch", she grabbed the yellow pegasus and, after thanking the mare heartily once more, planted a firm kiss on the wildly-blushing pony's cheek. "Luna..." Just thinking about that kiss made the alicorn's face redden slightly. Maybe that wasn't such a good idea... she thought. "Oh, Luuuuuuunaaaaaa..." Ah, what's past is past, nothing I can— "Luna! Come in, Luna!" The dark princess shook her head, dispelling her daydreams and returning to reality. She found herself standing at her sister's side on the stairs leading into the royal palace. Celestia gave her a worried look. "Sorry, sister, I was lost in thought," Luna said. "You don't say," Celestia replied. "C'mon, help me out here, I don't want to have to do all the greeting by myself! Good evening," she said to a passing mare. "But Ceeellyyyy," the other alicorn whined, "the Grand Galloping Gala is so boring!" A nearby noble heard this and frowned. "Heh, sorry..." "Do you have anything to do right now that would be a better use of your time? I hear that Hamfist has more paperwork that he needs you to fill out, if you'd rather take care of that." "Ugh, speak not of paperwork, I implore you." Over the past month, Luna had been presented with form after form, packet after packet, and waiver after waiver. Apparently, when a virtually all-powerful deity was possessed by an evil entity, such as the specter, there was a great deal of clerical work that said-deity was required to complete. At that moment, Luna suspected that she would snap and her vision would go red if she caught sight of even a single scrap of parchment, and may a god stronger than she help anypony who tried to stand in the way of the resulting rampage. "I still do not understand the point of our being here. Why are we, the sovereign rulers of this land, required to stand in one place all night long? Hello there, that is a very...er, nice... hat you have." "That's just how these things are done, Luna. Greetings, welcome to the gala!" "You cannot use that excuse on me anymore!" Luna protested. "Salutations, I am glad to see you!" To Celestia, she continued. "Bah, whatever, have it your way if you must." "I must." "Just so you know, I expect to receive the biggest box of doughnuts available after this..." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ In another area of the palace, the air was significantly less festive. A guard stood at attention in front of a door, above which hung a sign that read, "Laboratory". "Why'd I gotta get lab-guard duty?" he grumbled to himself. "All the others got to go to the gala, but nooooooo, let's have old Stomper watch over the test tubes!" "You certainly have gotten the short end of the stick, hm?" The voice caught Stomper by surprise, as he hadn't been expecting to meet anypony there until his relief showed up in a couple of hours. However, a pale-purple unicorn mare with a stunningly well-kept white mane defied those expectations and now stood before him. "I-I-Identify yourself!" the guard barked, remembering himself and shutting his jaw before a bug flew down his throat. "Just a curious party-goer." She sauntered over to stand close by him and batted her eyelids. "I hear that there's something very interesting being kept in the castle lab these days, and I just wanted to have a look..." "Sorry, Miss, uh..." The mare didn't offer her name. "...Miss Whatever, but nopony is allowed—" "Aw, relax a little!" she said with a pout. "I promise that I'll... make it worth your while..." Now she was close enough for him to smell perfume. Stomper gulped, eyes darting back and forth as sweat began to drip down his face. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Twenty minutes later, the light-purple mare pranced happily out of the castle gates, a large sack slung over her back. Two other unicorns, both stallions, one blue and one red, fell into step beside her. "You got it, right?" the red one asked her. "Tch, 'course I do. Do you think I'm some kind of slacker?" The other stallion raised an eyebrow questioningly. "How did you get by the guard?" "Oh, I just gave him what every stallion wants from a beautiful mare in the middle of the night." The two males snickered, earning them each a confused look. "What?" "We never thought you'd give away your body like that, is all." "Wait, what?!" the mare screeched. "Get your minds out of the gutter, you—you... sickos! Snacks, I gave him snacks! Tons and tons of junk food! You bunch of perverts!" "Oh." The blue stallion's face fell. "That's a lot less interesting. Anyway, you should work on your phrasing, so ponies don't misunderstand you." "Most ponies don't have screwed-up thoughts," she muttered. "Getting back on topic... you're sure you got the right one?" "You two are really riding me hard tonight." They began to chuckle again, and the mare realized once more what she had intimated. "Grow up, you two!" As soon as they stifled their laughter, she dropped the bag onto the ground and, using her magic, pulled out a transparent orb. Inside it was an inky substance, somewhere between shadow and liquid. However, their attention instead focused on the malicious green eyes that stared out hatefully; only the magical nature of its prison prevented the specter from possessing its current captors. "Yep, that seems right," the red stallion said. "Let's get it back, and I'll see if I can extract anything useful from its memories." The other stallion wrung his hooves together. "And then we'll know everything we need to deal with our sweet princess." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Thank you for waking up to walk with me, dear." "It's alright, I couldn't sleep, either." Rarity and Fluttershy made their way slowly through the darkened streets of Ponyville. Clouds from an earlier storm hid the night sky from sight, denying everypony a view of Luna's brilliant starscape. A few twinkling points of light appeared through gaps, and the moon itself made an appearance from time to time, but in general, there was little of note to see. Hopefully it'll clear up soon, the pegasus thought as she gazed upwards. Rarity glanced over and saw where her friend was looking; a sly smile spread across the white mare's face. "So, how goes the quest for Luna's affections?" "What?" Fluttershy's heart jumped and her cheeks reddened instantly. "I—that is, she—why—" The unicorn chuckled and pulled her friend into a light embrace. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry... I couldn't help but tease. But in all seriousness, have you put any thought into pursuing her?" "I... I have..." "Really?! Well don't keep me in the dark, what do you plan to do?!" "I've, um, decided that I'm n-not going to do, um, anything." For a few seconds, Rarity was at a loss for words and could only stare at the pegasus blankly. Finally, she found her voice. "I apologize, could you repeat that for me?" "I'm not g-going to d-do any—" "Yes yes, that's what I thought I heard." She exhaled wearily. "That doesn't seem to me like a very good way to start a relationship with somepony." "I don't want to start a relationship," Fluttershy said. The other mare took a moment to ponder this apparent conundrum.; she soon realized what her friend was getting at. "Oh, now I see. Let me guess, it's because of some nonsense like, 'She's immortal, she won't want to be with a mortal pony', or, 'Why would a princess love a common pony like me?'" "Actually, that's very clo—" "It's also very ridiculous!" Rarity daintily stomped to accentuate her point. "It's not that you don't want to start a relationship, but rather that you're scared to start a relationship. You have seen no signs that would indicate that she doesn't like you, am I correct?" The pegasus nodded her head. "And you know that your own feelings are very strong, correct?" Again, a nod. "Then it is your obligation—no, your solemn duty—to use all of your might to court the pony you love!" That last statement threw Fluttershy off-balance. "I-I'm not sure I follow." "Look at it this way, then. You are certain of your own feelings, but not her's. What if she's the same as you?" "But what if she's not?" "Then she'll tell you herself when the time comes," Rarity said. "Luna's thoughts and emotions are for her to decide, not you. Do you understand?" "I—yes, I think so." "Excellent! Now, let us discuss tactics..." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Free at last, oh thank you thank you thank you," Luna breathed to nopony in particular as she took to the sky. When Celestia finally declared the greeting period to be over, the lunar princess had taken that as her cue to make like a banana and leave. Ah, my poor legs, so stiff... She stretched her limbs out, gasping in sudden relief when the tendons cracked. Normally, at this time of night, Luna would be dropping off into sleep, but she was in no mood for that at the moment. She felt far too restless to slumber, so she instead decided to see where her wings would carry her; the mare was barely even surprised when she found herself turning towards Ponyville. There's no way anypony will be awake, she thought when the village came into view. Not this late at night. Sure enough, Twilight's library was closed; no lights shone from inside. Luna briefly considered hopping into the younger alicorn's dreams for a bit, but ultimately decided against it. She had long ago learned to avoid the dreams of anypony close to her, due to a circumstance involving Celestia, a ferret, a piece of string, and a boat-load of pineapples. To that day, the princess of the sun had not wholly forgiven her sister for that. Luna turned from the tree-house and soared around the rest of the town. Her mind began to calm a bit when she saw that she was the only one awake, and a yawn escaped her mouth. Just as she resolved to turn and head back home for some rest, her keen eyes spotted movement below. "Aha, success!" she said under her breath. Her wings came in close and she dove towards the ground, corkscrewing while she did so. At the last moment, the feathery appendages flared out and halted her downward motion, allowing the princess to touch down lightly. "Eeek!" squeaked Fluttershy when the black shadow whizzed into view. In an instant, she was hiding in a nearby bush, eyes peeking cautiously out. "Bravo!" Rarity cheered, stomping her appluase. "Yes, thank you, thank you." The princess bowed low. "I speak truly when I say that I am delighted to find that there are still two... um, where did Fluttershy go?" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Oh dear oh dear, how much did she hear? How long has she been listening? Was she above us the whole time? This is bad bad bad bad! These thoughts and more ran through poor Fluttershy's head when she realized that it was Luna who had swooped down upon them and not some giant, evil, terrifying monster come to eat her and Rarity. "Heh heh, I'll be right back," Rarity told the princess, trotting over to where the pegasus hid. "Fluttershy!" she whispered urgently. "This is your big chance!" "What do you mean?" the yellow mare hissed back. "Wasn't she listening to everything we talked about?" "Of course not, she just got here. Alright, here's what you should tell her." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Another long yawn cracked Luna's jaw while the other two mares held a hushed conversation between themselves. Finally, they wrapped it up, and Rarity pushed her reluctant friend forward. "Good evening to you," the princess said with a forced smile that she meant to be disarming, but in reality came off as slightly grotesque. "U-u-um, L-Luna..." Fluttershy stuttered. "Um, um, w-will you, um..." Something is the matter. Am I frightening her again? "Please be not afraid, dear Fluttershy. I apologize for scaring you; it was not my intention." "No, it's not th-that." The pegasus drew herself up and swallowed heavily. "Um, are you, um, free, tomorrow?" "I am in fact not busy tomorrow, but why...?" Luna's face lit as realization dawned upon her. "Oh oh! You want to dangle!" When she only received blank stares, the princess clarified. "Dangle out?" "Hang out?" Rarity offered, to which Luna nodded enthusiastically. "Yes!" Fluttershy scuffed a clump of grass with her hoof. "If it's okay with you..." "Of course it is! Yes, what shall we do?" The pegasus glanced at her unicorn friend as if to say, "What now? I didn't think this far ahead." Rarity came forward and whispered a few words into her ear. "Um, would you like to see a movie?" Fluttershy asked. "Then we could... get dinner... or something..." She hid behind her pink mane, the blush on her cheeks going completely unnoticed. "Woohoo!" the alicorn cheered. "I have never—" A nearby window slammed open and an aged stallion stuck his head out. "You kids shut up, some of us are tryin' to get some sleep!" he shouted. "And stay off my lawn! In my day, we didn't bother our elders, ten miles in the snow, uphill both ways..." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After Luna gave her farewells and flew away (and after Rarity shouted the time of the movie after her, because a supremely nervous Fluttershy had forgotten to mention it), the little pegasus once more found herself shaking; however, this time the anxiety came from sheer excitement instead of fear. "Fluttershy! Calm down!" the unicorn said with a chuckle. "At this rate, you'll wear yourself out!" "But this is so wonderful! Thank you for not letting me back off!" "Just get some sleep, and everything will be fine. I'm so happy for you! This is the first step towards something beautiful, just you wait and see." "Thank you..." Sudden weariness descended on the little mare, and she realized how fatigued she really was. "I think... *yawn*... I'll get some rest." "I'll bring by the tickets tomorrow," Rarity promised. They exchanged a few more words, then went their separate ways, each with a bounce in her gait. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Luna shambled down the hallway towards her private chambers, feeling more and more tired with each hoof she dragged along the ground. However, when she reached her door, she was surprised to find Hamfist standing guard outside. "Is something wrong?" she asked the sentry. "Princess Celestia has requested that you attend her!" the zealous guard said, snapping off a salute. "She awaits your arrival inside!" What does Celly want with... When Luna pushed her way inside and saw what sat on her bed, her eyes grew as wide as plates, and all of her fatigue quickly vanished. "There you are! I was wondering when you were going to get back!" Princess Celestia lounged on Luna's mattress, next to a box filled with enough doughnuts to feed Pinkie Pie for a whole hour. "Dough...nuts..." the dark alicorn intoned reverently, moving to sit beside her sister. She was about to reach in when she paused and looked beseechingly into the white alicorn's eyes. "Tia, can I...?" "Ha, help yourself-" The words had barely left her mouth when Luna's magic grabbed hold of a half dozen of the baked goods and shoveled them down her throat. "Geez, I'm glad your manners are better in public..." The two sisters shared an amiable conversation (well, more like Celestia talked while Luna nodded and chewed) while they made their way through the box. The princess of the night's good mood was contagious, and the normally emotionally guarded Celestia found herself laughing and talking more than she had in a long time. Just as Luna began to feel the slightest bit stuffed, a thought occurred to her. "Is Hamfist still outside?" she asked. Her sister looked at her askance. "I'd bet my crown on it. Why do you ask?" Without answering, Luna hopped to her feet and walked to the door. "Hamfist, come in," she said to him, stepping aside to allow the guard entry. "Have a doughnut." He halted in front of the humongous box. "A... doughnut?" "Don't hold back on our accounts," Celestia added, nudging the container forward. "But I've never had..." Expressions of shock crossed the alicorns' faces. "You what?" the white mare cried, while her sister yelled, "Blasphemy!" "That settles it. You have to eat at least one." Luna sat on her haunches and watched him expectantly. "I guess just one won't hurt." The stallion's horn lit and he pulled a simple glazed ring out of the box with a levitation spell. With both mares watching, he self-consciously took a small bite. To most ponies, the tiny smile that formed on his face wouldn't have indicated much, but to the two princesses, who knew Hamfist's stoic and sour demeanour, it spoke volumes. "It's not bad." Me, being nice to Hamfist, Luna thought wryly. Next thing you know, I'll be hugging Discord. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The next morning, a very tired stallion finished exploring the mind of the specter. He locked the beast away in a dark cabinet before going to report to his superior. "Hey, Shower," he shouted to the light-purple mare when he finally found her, "I finished up with my research." "That's 'May Shower' to you," she corrected him. When he proffered a stack of messily scribbled notes, May took hold of them with her magic and began to read through. By the time she reached the final sheet, a light grin had spread across her face. "So, she has a love interest, eh?" "That appears to be the case." "Hmmm..." The mare put a hoof to her chin and thought deeply about what she should do with that information. "I guess the best thing to do would be to disrupt that relationship," she decided at last. "At the very least it'll distract her." "Is 'distracting' Princess Luna good enough for our purposes?" the stallion asked. "Look, don't go questioning me, okay? I've thought long and hard about all of—what's so funny?!" He forced himself to stop chuckling. "N-nothing, May." "Wait, long and har... seriously, grow the hay up!" Author's Note Little did Luna realize the chain of events that she set in motion that fateful night when she offered Hamfist a doughnut. A new pony was born that day, one that craved the taste of ringed confections, be they iced, glazed, powdered, filled, or a combination of all of the above. However, he discovered that, no matter how many he ate, he never grew full or gained weight. The stallion recognized this gift for what it was, and vowed to put it to use for the good of ponykind. He now prowls the streets during the late hours, delivering baked justice to those who would disrupt the peaceful existence of doughnut-loving ponies everywhere. Aided by his sidekick, the faithful Turkeycock, by day he is Hamfist the guard, and by night, he is... The Doughnut.
(Extra) Ch 15: In Which Rarity's Plan Almost Backfires, and Celestia Reveals Her Bad Side"Ugh..." Luna groaned as a shaft of sunlight fell upon her closed eye. She shifted herself in an attempt to evade the nuisance, but the stubborn beam refused to let her be. Finally, after a full minute of resisting, the princess lifted her eyelids and sat up, glancing around while a yawn stretched her jaw open to capacity. On the bed next to her slept Princess Celestia, specks of icing all over her muzzle from the doughnut binge of the previous night. As if the thought of eating had been a cue, the dark alicorn's stomach twinged in protest. I suppose consuming one's weight in doughnuts does not make for a good diet, she mused ruefully. She slid to her hooves and groaned once more as her belly lurched. Nope, definitely not a good diet. "Whhaaaaaat's goooing ooooon?" warbled a raspy voice from behind. Luna's eyes widened in terror and her knees began to quake; she knew whose voice it was. "Whoo woke me uup?" The lunar princess turned slowly while easing her way to the door. "N-now Tia, why don't you just go back to sleep. There's no need to do anything hasty." On the bed, Celestia pushed herself onto her forelegs and cast a bleary gaze at her sister. A pair of incredibly sunken, dark eyes stared out from underneath a muted rainbow mane that was definitely not swirling as it usually did. On unsteady hooves, she stood and began to stalk forward, towards the frightened blue mare. A quick burst of motion saw Luna out the door and down the hallway in a flash. "Flee!" she cried to anypony who would heed her words. "The Terrifying Monster of the Morning is upon us! Flee, I say!" Celestia's nightmarish head poked past her sister's door, her expression decidedly bewildered. "Iiis theere somethiing on myy facce??" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Fluttershy, let's go over the checklist again." Twilight held her quill pressed up against the parchment, ready to start checking things off. "We've already done this five times," the pegasus protested. "But these things are important!" Twilight said. "What if you forget something because you didn't go over the list?" "I would listen to her, if I were you," Rarity added. "You do want this to go well, don't you?" The two other mares gathered in Fluttershy's cottage in order to assist her in preparing for the impending date. When she had found out about it, Twilight had insisted upon helping make certain that her friend got to live happily ever after with her one, true love (Twilight's words, not Fluttershy's). "Then we can all write a letter to Princess Celestia to tell her what we learned!" the alicorn had exclaimed with a goofy smile, giddily bouncing in place like a filly half her age. Rarity's expression upon hearing that had been dubious at best, and Fluttershy's had become downright mortified; something about writing a note to the princess about dating her sister just didn't appeal to the pegasus in the slightest. "Alright, I guess once more won't hurt..." Fluttershy said, caving in. "Yay! Item number one—movie tickets." "Check." "Good, checklist complete!" Twilight folded it neatly and slid it into a binder specifically meant to contain used lists. "You can't be too prepared, after all." "Do you girls really think this will be fine?" Fluttershy asked. Her voice wavered and her knees began to quake as her frayed nerves took control. "Darling, come here." Rarity threw a leg around her friend's shoulders and pulled her close. "The most important thing to remember is that Luna is at least as nervous as you are!" "Is she really?" Fluttershy said, daring to lift her head to look into the unicorn's eyes. "Definitely." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Woohoo!" Luna cheered during her morning gallop as her mane whipped back and forth in the wind. "Today is going to be great! I feel so happy, I'm not even slightly nervous!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Well, if you say so..." Fluttershy inhaled deeply, then slowly let the air out. "I do feel a little better." "What time are you supposed to meet her?" Twilight asked. "At ten o'clock." "What?! That's only an hour and a half from now! You have to get going now, or else you won't be sufficiently early!" Rarity smacked a hoof against her forehead. "The theater's only a five-minute walk from here, dear; I don't think time is something we need to worry about." "But—but—fine, have it your way." "Would either of you like some breakfast?" Fluttershy offered. "I thought I'd make some oatmeal." "That would be marvelous!" Twilight followed the pegasus into the kitchen. "Yeah, sounds good! Can I help?" Images of mushroom clouds and vaporized ponies assailed the other two mares at the thought of letting their alicorn friend assist in the cooking. "No!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The Celestia that Luna broke her fast with was in a far better state than the Celestia from earlier that morning. Gone were the sunken eyes, the matted mane, and the raspy, I've-come-for-your-soul voice; the zombie-pony was no more, replaced by the alicorn princess that all in Equestria knew (although maybe not personally) and loved (also maybe not personally). "What are your plans for the day?" she asked, sipping at a glass of juice. "I shall be in Ponyville for most of it." Luna speared a large hunk of pancake onto a fork and stuffed it all into her mouth at once. Apparently, her stomach ache had long since resolved itself. "Ay oh ot when Ay ell ee eh-ing ack." "Sorry, I don't speak 'mouth full of food'," Celestia said. Luna had the grace to blush before swallowing and repeating herself. "I said, 'I know not when I shall be getting back'." "Well, please say 'hello' to Twilight for me." "I... am not certain if I will see her today, but if I do, I shall pass on your greetings." Not going to see Twilight? the white alicorn thought, mildly surprised. "Do you have some kind of official function to perform there that will prevent you from having leisure time?" "No, I am merely taking part in dinner and a movie with Fluttershy." Fascinating... Celestia had been present when the pegasus accidentally proclaimed her feelings for everypony to hear, and thus wasn't wholly caught off-guard by this turn of events. "That sounds lovely. I hope you have a good day." "You, too!" With that, Luna bounced to her feet and shot out the door, ready to have as much fun as she could. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ It's almost time... I hope she remembers. But, of course she'll remember. What if she suddenly doesn't want to be here? So much could go wrong, I shouldn't get my hopes up. Or should I? If I get my hopes up, then maybe I'll be more fun to spend time with! Oh, but what would happen if things don't work out? Then I'd feel terrible... Maybe I should panic. Yes, panicking sounds like a good idea; I'll go with that. With these thoughts whirling through her head, Fluttershy was quickly winding herself up while she nervously waited for the lunar princess to arrive. "Psst, Fluttershy!" The yellow mare glanced at a nearby bush, behind which Twilight and Rarity hid; the unicorn poked her head out in order to get her friend's attention. "Everything will be fine! Just concentrate on having a lovely time!" Lovely time... Yes, this is going to be fun, isn't it? "Thanks, Rarity," she whispered back. "What are we whispering about?" Twilight asked in an obliviously loud voice. "Hush! She's coming!" The two observing mares ducked back out of sight, just in time to avoid being seen by Luna. "Greetings!" the princess said cheerfully to her waiting friend. "I'm not late, am I?" "No no, I only got here a few, um, minutes ago." Fluttershy shook her head, and the two tickets drifted out of her mane and fell to the ground. "Here are the tickets." They each took one and, side by side, trotted into the theater, chatting animatedly every step of the way. Within no time, the two found their seats in a darkened room filled with a multitude of other ponies. "Are you looking forward to the movie?" Fluttershy asked. "Almost as much as I looked forward to crushing the skull of Ivan the Monstrous against the rocks!" Luna said enthusiastically, smacking a hoof heavily on the floor to emphasize the "crushing" part. Both the pegasus and a number of nearby ponies gave the alicorn shocked looks, and she let out an embarrassed chuckle. "Heh, I mean, yes, I am anticipating this movie very much indeed." After another moment's pause, she added, "By the way, what is a 'movie'?" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As soon as Luna and Fluttershy disappeared into the theater, both Rarity and Twilight emerged from their concealment. "I seem to be spending more time in foliage than normal, these days," the unicorn observed, pulling twigs out of her mane. "It's not a trend I can say I'm fond of." "So what do we do while they're watching the movie?" Twilight asked. "We wait here, I suppose. I thought that something like this would happen, so I made certain to be prepared." She flipped open her bag and pulled out a pack of playing cards. "Now tell me, Twilight, do you know how to play 'Go Fish'?" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Drifting listlessly through the pleasantly warm air, Rainbow Dash fought the urge to fall asleep right then and there. I should find a cloud, she decided, looking around for a place suitable for napping. "No no no, you don't just get to look at my cards!" "But then how do I know you're not hiding any aces?" "Twilight, you wound me! Can you not trust what I say?" The mare's ears perked up when she recognized the arguing voices; she glanced at the ground so far below and realized that she was directly overtop Rarity and Twilight. "Eh, might as well see what's up." Her wings altered their trajectory and she lazily spiraled downwards to meet them. "How long has it been, anyway?" Twilight asked. "About an hour, now. The movie should be halfway done..." "Mornin'," Rainbow greeted when she got close enough. "Hey there, Rainbow." "Good morning, darling." The pegasus clapped her wings to her sides and dropped onto all four legs. "What's going on?" "We're just waiting here while Fluttershy and Luna watch a movie," Twilight answered. "Whoa! Did she seriously ask Luna to the movies? I didn't think that mare had it in her!" "It did take just a little bit of prodding, but in the end..." Rainbow grinned at her yellow friend's moxy. "So, what're they seeing?" Rarity's eyes grew large and a huge smile spread across her face. "I've been waiting all morning for somepony to ask me that!" "Really?" Twilight wondered. "Is it important?" "It's very important! Tell me, what do you imagine would happen if poor little Fluttershy had to sit through a frightening movie? Why, she'd need somepony to comfort her, to hold her and keep her safe. If Luna is that pony, then surely we will know after this." Her eyes took on a starry sheen as she imagined her friend, enveloped by soft alicorn wings. The purple mare glanced at her friend askance. "That's eerily manipulative," she noted, to which Rarity just huffed and looked away. "You got them tickets for The Manehattan Mangler, didn't you?" Rainbow asked. "Indeed I did. Quite brilliant, if I do say so myself." The pegasus flopped over backwards and casually rested her head on her hooves. "Eh, I hate to tell you this, Rares, but it's not going to work." "What?!" Rarity exclaimed. "Why wouldn't it?" "It's a good plan and all, but there's just one problem—Fluttershy isn't afraid of scary movies." The expression on the unicorn's face became wooden. "What." "I know, weird, right? I found out a while ago, when I caught her watching The Nightmare on Nightmare Night; she wasn't even trembling. I've made her watch all the scariest flicks I could think of, too, and none of them worked, either. She's officially immune!" Twilight scratched her head in confusion. "Hold on, that doesn't make any sense at all. This is Fluttershy! She refuses to come outside on Nightmare Night because she's scared of the costumes! If a tree falls and nopony is there to hear it, she's still terrified by the sound! Why are scary movies the one exception?" "Don't look at me! You're the scientist, you figure it out!" "Huh." Rarity glanced thoughtfully at the theater. "I suppose we'll just have to hope things work out for the best." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Back inside, Fluttershy hummed quietly while she watched the slashing, stabbing, murdering, and general mangling that the big screen displayed. Nopony would ever have anticipated that their kind, gentle, graceful, timid Fluttershy was capable of gazing upon such a macabre film while maintaining that calm little smile of her's, but here she sat, seemingly enjoying herself. On a whim, she glanced over at Luna, and the smile suddenly disappeared. Where the pegasus was utterly calm, her fellow movie-goer was most definitely not. The princess's face was an ashen-gray as she stared forward, wide-eyed and unblinking. Her legs wouldn't stop shaking, so tense were her muscles. I don't suppose that is a good thing, Fluttershy mused, wondering if Luna would be able to survive until the end. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Look!" Twilight exclaimed an hour later, pointing excitedly at a crowd of ponies that was emerging. "Looks like they're coming out now!" "Hide!" The two accomplices ducked back into their hiding space, remembering to pull Rainbow along with them. The mass of movie-goers dispersed, and still neither Luna nor Fluttershy made an appearance. Finally, just as the three ponies were about to give up and go back to shooting the breeze, the two mares in question appeared, pressed up against each other, just like Rarity originally expected. Well, almost like Rarity originally expected. Instead of being the pony in need of comfort, Fluttershy was the one with her wing over her companion's back. "There, there," she said softly, "it's over now... it wasn't real... don't be afraid... everything's all right." On the other hoof, Luna looked absolutely miserable. She was pale and trembling, and muttered to herself semi-coherently. "No, watch thy blind side... go not into that room... he waits inside, prepared to stab thee... the horror... the horror..." Rainbow tried her hardest to refrain from laughing, but it was a losing battle. "Looks like your plan worked after all, Rares," she said, unable to restrain her quiet snickers and chortles. "And on top of getting them closer to each other, you even managed to traumatize Luna!" "Don't you think that—" Rarity began, but the blue mare cut her off. "Hold on, hold on, I got one more. It looks like you just made Luna," she said, pulling out and donning a pair of sunglasses, "into Fluttershy's 'maim' squeeze." Author's Note YEEEEEEEAAAAAHHH!!!
(Extra) Ch 16: In Which Twilight is Pushed Too Far, and Fluttershy Touches a PussyPonyville proper bustled with all manner of activities, just like it did every day. A marketplace, some random game stalls, and other such attractions littered the main square, which served as the most popular destination in town. Into this area trotted a cloaked and hooded pony, behind whom floated a large box. Displayed prominently on the cloak's back was a large, arcane-looking symbol. The pony glanced back and forth, as if in search of something, before choosing a direction and setting off, box close behind. A number of the other ponies glanced at the newcomer in interest, but within a short span of time, the stranger was gone, and all thoughts of disguised travelers were forgotten. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Are you sure you'll be alright?" "I have never felt better!" After leading the shell-shocked Luna away from the movie theater, Fluttershy chose an outdoor café where they could order something to eat. The princess regained cognizance within moments of sitting down and now did her best to pretend like she hadn't been the least bit scared. "But, you're still shaking..." "Nonsense, it must be your imagination." When the pegasus's expression remained doubtful, Luna stepped up her game. "Would the pony who defeated the nigh-unstoppable world-eater dragon be frightened by a mere mangler? Would she who has been through countless campaigns, led armies during thousands of battles, and undergone decades of martial training, have fear of a stallion wearing a hockey mask and wielding a kitchen knife?" "Um... yes." For a few moments, the alicorn stared straight into her friend's eyes, a hard look on her face. Finally, she threw her head back in resignation and sighed. "Fine, maybe I was just the slightest bit anxious." "It's alright, I'm scared of things all the time..." Fluttershy said consolingly. "I don't think I could be brave enough to fight a dragon, although I did lecture one, once." She opened a menu and began to peruse its contents. "What do you want to eat? Rarity said that they serve the best bouquets here." "Is there anything more filling?" "I think so, let me look... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Why aren't we following them anymore? Explain it to me again." Back in Twilight's library, she was subjecting Rarity to a series of grueling questions while Rainbow flipped through some magazines. "Because I've realized that we can only help so much," the unicorn answered. "It's true that Fluttershy needed a little push to get started, but from this point on, she must make do without us." "That's the part I don't get. What's stopping us from helping?" "Just think about it for a bit, dear. If they are truly meant to be together, then things will work out fine with just the two of them, and interference from us would only 'muddle the mixture', as it were." Rainbow looked up from the issue of Fliers Weekly that she had chosen to read. "She's trying to say she doesn't want to screw it up." "Exactly!" Rarity said. "In fact, I fear that I may have already done too much." Twilight stood and went into the kitchen. "I'm sure that's not the case. Everything you've done has been for Fluttershy; your intentions were good, so there's no way your actions will ruin anything for her. Do either of you two want a drink?" "A glass of iced tea would be lovely." "Got anything with bubbles?" The alicorn opened the refrigerator and looked in to see what she could find. "No, but I've got—" "BOO!" shouted Discord's disembodied head from its place next to the mustard. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ To Luna's relief, the conversation had finally been steered away from her reaction to The Manehattan Mangler. I shall have to train myself, so that I can go to more movies without embarrassing myself. "Um, Luna, I've been having a really fun time, so far," Fluttershy said bashfully. For some reason, which the princess couldn't discern, her friend's eyes were fixed downwards on the table. "Thank you for going with me, even though you had a bad experience." "How many times must I tell you, I am perfectly fine!" Luna realized how loudly she was talking and lowered the volume a bit. "And anyway, the only thing that really matters is that we are 'hanging out'. I am enjoying myself as much as you are! See?" She used her hooves to stretch the sides of her mouth up into a goofy-looking smile, earning an appreciative giggle. Why am I acting so silly? she wondered. Only for you, Fluttershy, would I do something like this... "Was it really okay for you to leave the castle?" the pegasus asked. "I mean, being a princess, you probably have a lot to do." Luna glanced back and forth conspiratorially before answering. "One perk of being a ruler is that you can put things off if you so desire." While Fluttershy started a new topic of conversation, the alicorn noticed that, although there were plenty of other ponies at the café, none of them occupied any of the adjacent tables. In fact, the only empty places available were the ones that ringed the table at which Luna sat. They must be avoiding me, she realized. I still have a long way to go, I suppose... "It's alright," the yellow mare said; her words cut right through Luna's thoughts and brought her attention back to their conversation. "You aren't alone; I know how wonderful you really are, and so do your other friends." "Fluttershy..." the princess said, looking away so that nopony could see her eyes tear up. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ This is the part where I should take her hoof, right? Fluttershy thought. She eyed the closest of Luna's forelegs, which rested lightly on the ground. But is it alright for me to do that? I still don't know how she'll react. What if she yanks it away and gets mad? Despite these negative thoughts, the pegasus began to stretch her own hoof forward, slowly reaching... "Look, here come the appetizers!" Luna exclaimed, pulling her hoof out of Fluttershy's range in order to point at the approaching waiter. The yellow mare snatched her leg back before anypony could see what she had been doing. A large plate of fried onion rings was placed in the middle of the table, and Luna's mood brightened immediately. "So this is 'fried food'. What does it taste like?" "Try it and see, I'm sure you'll like it. Um, not that I'm trying to tell you what to do..." It's probably for the best that she moved her hoof... Sighing quietly, she took a ring for herself and began to eat. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "AAAAAAHHHHH!!" Twilight shrieked, leaping back to stand on her hind legs against the wall, forelegs splayed out to either side. "Twilight!" Rarity cried. She and Rainbow rushed over to investigate their friend's outcry. "What happened?!" Discord's head rolled out of the refrigerator and fell to the ground. "HAHAHAHA!" he roared, unable to control himself. "HAHA!" His body appeared and picked the head up, plopping it onto his neck upside-down. "Twilight, are you alright?" The alicorn's chest heaved as she sucked in air, frightened half-to-death; her eyes were as wide as they could possibly be. "Haa, oh, Sparkle, you're too easy!" He released a few more chortles, plainly not caring that his head was still upside-down. "I laughed my head off at that one! Get it? Laughed my head off?" Once more, the dragonequis fell to the ground and lost himself in laughter. Rainbow couldn't help but chuckle. "Heh, that was pretty goo—" she began to say, until Rarity cut her off with a glare. "Er, I mean, how dare you do that to Twi?! Jerk!" Getting to his feet, Discord twisted his head around until it rested at the proper angle and position. "I swear, messing with you ponies never gets..." An aura appeared suddenly behind the dragonequis, one that caused the temperature in the room to plummet. "...old?" He slowly looked behind himself, where Twilight finally managed to peel herself off of the wall. "Discord..." she growled menacingly. Her eyes took on a red tint, and her horn glowed with an ominous light. "N-now, Sparkle, let's not over-react," Discord said, backing away. "It was just a prank! What's a practical joke between friends, eh?" The alicorn wore the most intensely intimidating scowl anypony had ever seen as she ignored his pleading and stalked forward. "You aren't... getting off... so easily," she said, still taking very quick, shallow breaths. His expression devolved into one of resignation, and he stopped trying to escape. "Well... this is probably going to hurt..." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The waiter cleared the last of their plates from the table as Luna leaned back and patted her stomach. "That was a worthy meal..." she said in a sleepy voice. "Y-yeah," Fluttershy agreed, amazed at how much the alicorn had managed to put away. Once more, she glanced at Luna's hoof and contemplated taking it. This is supposed to be a date. Aren't ponies supposed to be intimate on dates? I really should at least try... She slowly reached out, determined to accomplish her goal before the courage fled her. Unfortunately, fate was not on the pegasus's side. "Why hello, Fluttershy!" Neither she nor Luna (who was almost comatose from the amount of food she had eaten) had noticed the hooded pony approach their table. The stranger dropped an unmarked box on the ground. "It's nice to meet you." Fluttershy shrank backwards and retracted her leg as shyness replaced bravery. "Wh-wh-who are you?" she asked quietly. "Ah, right, the hood." She threw the cloth covering back to reveal her face. Her immaculately kept mane curled around her neck, perfectly accentuating her light-purple coat. "Sorry. I'm May Shower, and I just really wanted to meet you. I've heard so many good things..." "Why did you have to 'meet' her right now?" Luna asked. Her eyes narrowed, and she inspected May closely. "I'm sorry, I wasn't talking to you," the unicorn answered. Before the slighted princess could reply, May turned back to Fluttershy. "I didn't know that you would be such a pretty mare, though." "I-I-I-I-" the pegasus stuttered, unused to such a direct compliment from a complete stranger. "And you certainly are cute when you act all shy like that." May brushed against Fluttershy's side and batted her eyes. "Tell me... would you like to see my pussy?" All noise stopped as every customer in the café ceased whatever they were doing and looked in shock at the purple mare. Two tables over, a stallion's nose started to bleed; the mare he sat with noticed this and smacked him on the back of the head. A loud crash resounded through the air when a flabbergasted waiter dropped a plate she carried. As for Fluttershy, her mouth opened and closed repeatedly, but no sounds came forth; she resembled nothing so much as a giant, yellow, winged fish, gasping for air. Even her mind was absolutely blank. "I do not understand," the ever-oblivious Luna said. "Why is everypony staring at us?" "Pu-pu-pu-pu—" Fluttershy managed to get out. "—pussy?!" May nodded enthusiastically. "Yeah, you know, my pu—" Her voice trailed off as she realized her slip. "For hay's sake, I meant my cat! My cat!" She opened the box and levitated a very grumpy, very ragged cat into the air and placed it on the table, where it rolled onto its side and didn't move. "All of you are awful!" Everypony breathed a sigh of relief and went back to their own business. Immediately upon seeing the animal, Fluttershy's apprehension vanished. "Aw, he's so adorable!" She nuzzled the cat lightly; it didn't react in the slightest. "He looks dead," Luna noted. She reached forward and poked the cat in the side, getting absolutely no response. The pegasus turned her attention back May. "Um, I appreciate you coming here, and saying nice things, and showing me your cat, but—" "Fluttershy and I do not have many opportunities to hang out," Luna said, "so we would appreciate having this time to ourselves." Fluttershy threw her friend a surprised glance. Why is she trying to chase May away? "I can join you though, right?" May asked, moving to an empty place without waiting for an answer. Unfortunately for her, she found her way blocked by an alicorn. "We ask that thou leaveth Us be," the princess said. Her eyes took on a dangerous glint. Is... is Luna jealous?! "Fine!" the unicorn snapped. "I didn't want to spend time with either you anyway! Fluttershy, I believe you'll be interested to know that Princess Luna has no interest in you as a friend. She just wants to get you into her bed!" "What?!" Luna bellowed. "What basis dost thou have for—" "We got a look into the specter's mind," May said; a wicked grin appeared on her face. "We know everything that it knows; we know that you have the stupidest crush on this pegasus here." She dropped the cat back into the box and turned to leave. "Well, enjoy the rest of your meal, you two!" The unicorn laughed to herself as she walked off. Once more, everypony in the area had stopped talking and cast their eyes right at Luna and Fluttershy. Even the café staff poked their heads out of the building in order to see what was happening. The princess's expression became panicked as the situation sank in. "Flutershy, I just—" She quickly stood and began to back away. "I didn't—it's not true, We wouldn't think that! Please believe Us! We're friends, I—" Her wings spread and she propelled herself into the air. "Forgive me," was the last thing she said before she was gone. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Ow!" Discord yelped when Twilight rubbed anti-burn cream on an extra-badly burnt spot. "Go easy, please!" "Stop whining, you big foal," she told him. "You only have yourself to blame." "Right, because I was the one who thought it would be a good idea to light Discord on fire," he shot back. "You should both be ashamed of yourselves," Rarity said. "Discord, you nearly gave the poor mare a heart-attack! And Twilight, if I hadn't been able to find your fire extinguisher, you could have burnt the library down!" "Oh, but immolating the dragonequis is fine, is that it?" "I'm giving you first aid, aren't I?" Twilight snapped. "I wouldn't be helping you if I wasn't just a little bit sorry." "You have a funny way of showing it!" The alicorn scowled and squirted more ointment onto the wound. "Ow!" He opened his mouth to say more but was cut off when the door quietly opened and Fluttershy walked in. "Fluttershy!" Rarity said. "How did the rest of your date go?" The pegasus didn't answer, but when she looked up, her eyes shimmered with unshed tears. Before the unicorn knew it, she was bowled over by the now-wailing mare. "That well, huh?" Discord said sarcastically, causing Twilight to jab the burn with her hoof. "OW! You weren't even pretending to be treating me that time!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Because she no longer concealed her features under a hood, nopony paid very much attention to the departing May as she made her way back out of town. A look of doubt was plastered on her face while she thought about what she had just done. "We know everything that it knows; we know that you have the stupidest crush on this pegasus here." The mare remembered the expression that Luna had adopted when May said those words, and despite the fact that her plan was a success, she couldn't find it in her heart to rejoice. Is this really okay? she wondered. Is it— "Very nicely done." May's head shot up to find that one of her stallion unicorn cohorts had joined her. "I saw the whole thing. There's no way the princess walks away from that with a peaceful mind." "Yeah..." The stallion looked at her curiously. "You aren't having second thoughts about this, are you?" "N-no way!" she said, shaking her head. "The past five years have all been in preparation for our master! It'll take more than one depressed pony to shake my resolve!" "Resolve to do what, We wonder?" The ground shook as Luna came crashing down in front of them. "Perhaps thou shouldst inform Us the nature of thy scheme." "We're not scheming anything," the stallion said immediately. May added her own protests. "Yeah, just because you're mad that you won't be getting lucky tonight doesn't mean you can take it out on us." "That is where thou art mistaken," the princess said. "We knew that We recognized that seal upon thy back." Her hoof rose to point at the arcane marking on May's cloak. "It took some time, but We finally remembered. Thou art of the Cult of Dromus." "What makes you say—" "Fine, you caught us." The stallion looked at his mare companion in surprise at her admission. "Thy cult should have dissolved soon after We sealed Dromus away; its continued existence gives Us reason to suspect that thou art planning something dire." "Get ready," May whispered. "What art thou—" "Go!" She threw a red pellet at Luna's feet, where it exploded in a burst of opaque smoke. "You've gotten slow, princess!" "We shall show thee slow!" However, despite Luna's bravado, the smoke made its way into her lungs and she couldn't help but cough. After a few minutes, she managed to get to her feet and escape the cloud, but by then, her quarries were long gone. With a final depressed glance towards both Ponyville and the pegasus she would likely never be able to spend time with again, the princess departed for Canterlot.
(Extra) Ch 17: In Which Celestia Makes a Difficult Decision, and Rarity Springs Into Action"A-and then, she just flew away!" Fluttershy said, sniffing loudly and wiping at her eyes. "She pr-probably never wants to see me again!" A fresh wave of tears rolled down her face, and Rarity reached forward to pull the sobbing mare into a tight embrace. "You poor thing..." the unicorn cooed, lightly stroking Fluttershy's mane. "I can't believe that Luna would just leave without saying anything! Being confronted like that..." "A-a-actually, she d-did say something." The pegasus cleared her throat before continuing. "She looked really angry, a-and she denied that she felt anything for me, and she said that we're friends, and that she'd never think of me as anything else!" "Hmm..." Rarity hummed. She raised a hoof to her chin and scratched it. "Rainbow, be a dear and keep Fluttershy company, would you? Twilight, a word, please." She led the alicorn to the other side of the room while Rainbow occupied her distraught friend. "Is something wrong?" Twilight asked. "I mean, besides the obvious." She waved a hoof in Fluttershy's direction, where Discord had moved over to join the two pegasi. "If Fluttershy's account is accurate, then the way Luna reacted doesn't make sense." Rarity beckoned the alicorn closer and lowered her voice so that nopony else could hear her. "If somepony came up to you and accused you of being in love with me, how would you react?" Meanwhile, Rainbow had been given rabbit ears à la Discord, an act that drew a choked giggle from the crying pegasus. "What?!" Twilight exclaimed with a grin at the notion of being romantically attracted to one of her best friends. She released a few chortles before clapping a hoof over her mouth. At the same time, Rainbow glared at the dragonequis when he turned her tail into that of a giant, poofy bunny. A small smile appeared on Fluttershy's muzzle as she tentatively reached out a hoof and batted at one of the blue mare's floppy ears. The alicorn gave her friend a shamed glance. "I'm sorry, Rarity, I didn't mean—" "No, dear, that's good! You're proving my point exactly! That's how I would expect you to react! What I wouldn't expect is for you to flee the scene. In fact, I don't think Fluttershy was correct in saying that Luna was angry; I would bet my mane that she was actually panicking, because this 'May Shower's' accusations were too close to the truth!" "Wait, you think that Luna actually does have a crush on Fluttershy?!" "All signs point to—" "Alright, that's it, buddy!" Rainbow shouted at Discord. Her front teeth had been elongated so that she more closely resembled Angel bunny than a proper pony. "I'm gonna give you some bruises to keep those burns company!" By now, Fluttershy was laughing uncontrollably. "At least somepony is having luck making her feel better," Twilight said. "Let's go tell Fluttershy the good—" "No!" Rarity exclaimed, pulling her friend back. "We can't get her hopes up before we know for certain!" "I suppose it would be a letdown if you turned out to be wrong..." "Well, at least I know how I should proceed. I shall do everything I can to discern Luna's true feelings towards Fluttershy!" "Oof!" Discord slid on his face across the floor with an angry pegasus standing on his back. "Turn 'em back!" she yelled at him. "I don't wanna be a rabbit!" "...Although maybe I should break these two up, first." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Celestia's eyes darted back and forth, uncertain as to which of the two choices would be most proper for a pony of her stature. A line of sweat trickled slowly down her neck while indecisiveness plagued her very being. What should it be? she thought frantically. That would be improper for me to pick; it's not very princess-like, is it? However... As if a switch had been flipped, her face lit up with steely resolve. She lifted a leg and dashed the perspiration away with a single swipe of her hoof. "Very well, I have decided," the white alicorn proclaimed. "These types of choices are not always easy to make, but in the end, a ruler must always do what she thinks is right. Therefore... yes, I would like sprinkles on my sundae." A mischievous smile spread across her muzzle. The chef rolled his eyes at the melodramatic little speech. "Sprinkles on the sundae, understood. Now, what about a cherry on top?" Celestia's expression froze as new, wonderful avenues revealed themselves to her. However, just as she opened her mouth to speak, a loud klaxon alarm belted out its cry, filling the air with ear-splitting wails. A state of emergency? But the only ones who can declare that are myself and Luna! That means... "If you would be so kind, please leave my dessert in the freezer while I take care of some important business." "Of course, princess." The chef snapped off an impressive salute, considering his lack of military training. "Forgive me for the presumption, but I shall take the liberty of applying a cherry." "I knew there was a reason I didn't have you fired!" Celestia called over her shoulder as she cantered from the dining room. "That was a joke, right?" he shouted at the retreating monarch. When she didn't answer, a drop of sweat rolled down his forehead. "Right?" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ With the help of loyal Hamfist, Celestia soon learned that the main source of the commotion was located in the courtyard outside of the guard barracks. She arrived in no time at all to find Luna standing on a pedestal, belting out orders. "Step up patrols in the southern portion of the city!" she shouted, relying on her subordinates to determine who specifically should do what. "Bring Us as much information on obscure cults as the librarian can muster. Investigate the laboratory to see if the specter is still there! Take—" "Ahem." The dark alicorn stopped talking immediately when she saw that her sister had arrived. "Luna, what is the emergency?" "Dear sister, We have discovered the existence of an evil organization that We had thought vanished long ago. Thus, We are taking steps to ensure the safety of Our kingdom." "That does sound dire... however, would you step down from there and take a walk with me?" "...Very well." Within moments, the two alicorns plodded slowly through a garden maze. "Now... what exactly is this cult that you thought destroyed?" "Certainly you will recall the Cult of Dromus, a vile collection of vermin in the service of an even viler monster." "And that monster is..." Luna raised an eyebrow at her sister. "Er, its name is Dromus. Do you not remember?" "It rings a bell..." Celestia said musingly. "But I'm afraid I cannot bring any details to mind." "Dromus is the half-pony demon who, at the peak of his power, nearly toppled the kingdom!" "Sorry, it's not coming to me." "Do you remember the year I was entirely absent from the castle?" Luna asked. "I had to remain in the field to lead our forces against his invasion." "Still nothing." "Dromus is the one who called you, 'Hot-Plot'." Celestia's eyes lit up with divine fury. "HIM!!" "Yes, of course that's the part you remember," the princess of the moon said sarcastically, sighing and smacking a hoof against her forehead. "But, tell me the details of what happened," her sister said. "Weren't you spending the day with Flutt—" "I encountered them in Ponyville," Luna interrupted. "There were two of them, a mare and a stallion, both unicorns. On her back, the mare bore the sign of Dromus." "Is that all that happened?" "Of course not!" The dark alicorn tossed her head indignantly. "She threw a pellet at my feet that encompassed me in a cloud of smoke, preventing me from pursuing them while they escaped." "Well, what were they doing in Ponyville in the first place?" Celestia asked. "And how did you encounter them if you were with Flutter—" Once more, Luna cut her sister off. "I happened to run into them. I know not what their goal was." She's hiding something, the princess of the sun realized. That's the second time she didn't let me finish when I started to mention Fluttershy. "So let me make sure I have this right. You ran into two ponies, one of which had the sign of a centuries-old cult on her clothing." The other alicorn nodded. "And you don't know what they were there for." Another nod. "And they threw a smoke-bomb at you and escaped." Nod. "And there were only two of them." Nod. "Luna, I'm afraid that you may be overreacting." "But—" "It's clear to me that something occurred which upset you," Celestia continued. "Tell me what's wrong; are you alright?" Luna stepped back and fixed her sister with a cold stare. "Nothing is wrong. I am merely fulfilling my responsibilities as a ruler of this land." It's never easy, is it? "Very well, I'll let you keep your secret, but I insist that you call off this state of emergency. There is no concrete evidence that the Cult of Dromus has returned, nor that they are harboring any ill will towards Equestria. All we know is that somepony is walking around with their symbol, nothing more. As things are right now, you will only cause panic in Canterlot." Like a balloon with a hole jabbed into it, the dark princess deflated, and the aura of purpose that she had been giving off dissipated. "Yes, sister..." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Hold on, Angel," Fluttershy said tonelessly while putting together his dinner. "Mommy's almost finished." The rabbit tapped his foot impatiently as his stomach rumbled. "There, all done." She placed the bowl in front of him with far less grace than normal. Looking inside, Angel grimaced at the sight that met him. His usual salad, carefully crafted with the utmost precision, was nowhere to be seen. Instead, he found a sloppy mess of lettuce, tomato, and dressing; she had even forgotten to add the carrots. The bunny almost pushed the meal away in disgust before he remembered that his owner had recently gone through some sort of traumatic event. With a look that said, "The things I put up with for you," he dug in halfheartedly. The pegasus hadn't even waited to see if her Angel was eating before shambling into her sitting room, where Applejack waited. "Sorry to keep you waiting; I'm finished." "Ain't nothin' to 'pologize for," the earth pony replied. "Ah was just stoppin' by to check in, see how things're goin'." "Things are going fine." She sat down and rested her chin on the ground. "No offense, suges, but that wasn't exactly the most convincin' sentence Ah've ever heard." Fluttershy sighed and gave up the pretense of being alright. "You girls shouldn't worry about me; I'm not worth your time." "Now you stop that quitter talk right now!" Applejack scolded. "And Ah ain't gonna just sit around while one of mah best friends is down in the dumps. Ah actually had another reason for comin' by, as well." She paused to give her friend a chance to reply, but continued when no response was forthcoming. "Ah figure some hard work'd be good for ya, help keep yer mind off things. Why don't ya come down tomorrow and let me see what Ah can find for ya to do?" "I'm sorry, Applejack, but if it's okay with you, I'd rather stay here for a while." This immediately raised a red-flag in the orange mare's head. None of her friends would refuse a request to help out at Sweet Apple Acres unless they had a very, very good reason. This's worse than Ah thought... "Alright, well, you know where to find me if'n ya change yer mind. And Ah'm goin' to keep thinkin' of ways to help; Ah really hope ya feel better soon... we all do. We miss our Fluttershy." For the first time, her words seemed to reach the pegasus. "I'll... I'll try," Fluttershy said. "Thank you for thinking about me." After Applejack departed, Fluttershy flopped down on a couch and stared at the ceiling. "Should I try to do something?" she wondered out loud. Her eyes wavered uncertainly while her thoughts whirled. "Sweet Apple Acres," she finally decided. "Maybe, if I get better, I can see her again, after all." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The next morning, Twilight yelped in fright when the library door slammed open without warning. "Twilight!" Rarity exclaimed, galloping in without preamble. "I know how to fix it!" "Wh-what?" the alicorn stuttered, still trying to catch up. "What do you—fix what now?" "I know how to find out what Luna's feelings are!" "Oh. Oh!" Twilight bounced up and down with excitement. "What is it? How do we do it?" "First, I need you to help me do some research." If Rarity had said, "You just won a lifetime supply of candy, money, and books," Twilight wouldn't have been any happier. "Research?! With a friend?! Yay! What are we looking up?" "I need to find some kind of event in Canterlot that involves dresses or fashion, one that preferably is going to occur within the next few days. Do you have a periodical of some kind that would list such items?" "That's easy, the library gets free issues of Canterlot Life every week! We can go through the past two months' worth and see what there is!" With that said, the two mares got themselves drinks and sat down to work. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Luna yawned deeply as she made her way through the castle corridor en route to her mid-day meal with Celestia. She was just about to round a corner when she heard voices. "...act like a ruler." "Yeah, I know what you mean. She's just running around like a little schoolfilly, doing whatever she pleases." The princess poked her head into the intersection and saw two guards, each standing with his back to her. "It's embarrassing, really," one said. "And I heard that she's mooning after some random pegasus in Ponyville, while her sister takes care of all the important work." This accusation had little merit, because Luna had taken on plenty of duties that formerly belonged to Celestia before her sister's return from the moon. Apparently, not every pony knew this. "And what's with that whole 'possession' thing? Kind of like Nightmare Moon all over again." "You're preaching to the choir." A few days ago, Luna would have stepped forth and confronted the two stallions. She would have given them quite a few things to contemplate while they recovered from a lecture of epic proportions. However, the dark princess of the present couldn't muster the willpower to take any kind of direct action. Instead, she turned and walked in the other direction. A third stallion joined the other two, and his words caused her steps to falter. "What do you two think you're doing?" the newcomer said in an angry tone. "J-just talking, sir! We have no other duties assigned us, sir!" "No other duties? I see, I see. I understand, when you get some free time, it's only natural that you'd want to spend it in a leisurely manner, is that it?" "Yes, sir. Exactly, sir!" Luna looked around the corner once more, and her eyes went wide—Hamfist had appeared and now confronted the two other stallions. "Hm, yes, indeed it makes sense." His next words took the relieved smiles off of the unnamed guards' faces. "If you've got free time, then as your superior officer, I should find something for you to do, shouldn't I? Go clean the third floor latrines, if you would." "...Latrines?" "If that's not enough, the second floor's could use a scrubbing as well—" "No, sir, the third floor is more than enough!" Hamfist waved them away, but spoke once more before they left. "Oh, and if I hear either of you speak ill of Princess Luna again, you'll be begging me to let you wash bathrooms for the rest of your careers. Is that understood?" "Yes, sir!" "Understood, sir!" "Now get out of my sight," the senior guard barked. He stood stock still for a second more before leaving to take care of his own duties. A surprisingly-touched Luna tried to make sense of what had happened. Perhaps I've been a bit too hard on the stallion, she thought. However, the positive feeling soon left, and once more, depression reigned supreme. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Terrible!" Rarity cried dramatically, throwing another magazine aside. "We've been through nearly half a year's worth of material, and there is nothing good at all!" "Well, the further back we go, the less chance we'll find any mention of anything useful to us." Twilight turned a page and ran her seasoned eyes over the text. "I know that, but still." With a sigh, the unicorn rolled onto her back. "The soonest thing I could find is a conference on casual-wear in two months. Have you still not found anything?" "...No," was her friend's answer. "You paused!" Rarity said. "You clearly paused! You did find something, didn't you? Don't hold out on me, Twilight, what is it?" "Well, umm..." Twilight coughed nervously. "It's true that there is an event involving fashion... kind of." "When is it?" "Two weeks from tomorrow. But... I dont think you're going to like it." "Nonsense," the white mare scoffed. "Is it stallions' fashion? I admit that I'm a bit inexperienced in that, but this is for a friend; I will make do." "No, it's not stallions' fashion." Twilight's face showed clear apprehension. "I really don't think you're going to like it. Like, really really really not going to like it." "If it helps Fluttershy, then I must simply grin and bear it. Now, please tell me what you've found." Instead of speaking, the alicorn opened a magazine and slid it over for Rarity to look at. The unicorn stared at the page for a full minute before she looked back up, expression blank. "You have got to be kidding." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Hooded ponies threw themselves aside in order to stay out of the path of a dour May Shower as she trotted purposefully down the corridor. Her expression promised swift retribution to anypony who needlessly held her up. Why am I in such a bad mood? she wondered. Her eye twitched in irritation with herself. Ever since I split up Luna and that pegasus, I've felt like... "Gah!" she shouted out loud, causing a nearby stallion to flinch. She finally arrived at an unassuming wooden door and, without waiting, pushed her way inside. A young unicorn stallion sat at a desk, intensely focused on drawing something. "Sir, why aren't we doing anything?" May demanded angrily. "The princess is in a slump, we might not get a better chance than this!" "Kidnapping an alicorn is going to take more than that," the stallion mumbled. "Go away, I'm busy." "If we need to do more, then why don't we?" she asked. "Just lazing around like this isn't getting us any closer to our lord!" "Are you deaf?" he said, looking up for the first time. His horn flared, and a giant, green hand appeared and pushed May out the door. "I said I'm busy." The door slammed shut in her face. The mare stood, shaking nervously from the force of the magic that had just been used on her. He really is our secret weapon... she thought. I couldn't have done anything to stop him if I wanted to. "Fine. If things go poorly, it's your head," she said to the closed door, before turning and stomping off indignantly. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Luna was moping on her bed when a puff of green smoke heralded the arrival of a letter from Twilight; she was so out-of-sorts that she almost didn't open it. The mare unrolled the scroll and began to read, soon realizing that the note wasn't from Twilight after all. Dear Princess Luna, I would like to offer my sympathies to you. We heard what happened, and it must have been an awful ordeal to go through. If you need anything, anything at all, know that we are your friends, and will do whatever is necessary to cheer you up. On a different note, I am planning on visiting Canterlot two weeks from tomorrow in order to attend a certain event that is taking place at the Tri-Mane Convention Center. I mention this because I was wondering if I could spend a day with you while I'm in town. Also, would you be able to recommend a place where I could find accomodations for a few nights? Again, we all sincerely hope that you feel better, and I hope to see you in two weeks. Sincerely, Rarity "Tri-Mane Convention Center..." Luna mused out loud. "Is that not a two-minute walk from the castle gates?" "That is correct." Celestia entered the room, closing the door behind her. "Sister, is there any royal protocol that prevents a princess from having a 'sleepover'?" "A sleepover?" the white alicorn asked; her expression showed genuine surprise. "I-it should be okay..." "Very well! I shall invite Rarity to stay here!" For the first time in days, Luna's face was split by a wide smile. Suddenly, she recalled a specific passage from the letter. ...in order to attend a certain event. "Celly, you have knowledge of the happenings in Canterlot, do you not?" "I do, because of all the petitions that are brought before me in court," Celestia replied. "Is there something happening that you wish to know about?" "Yes. What event is taking place at the Tri-Mane Convention Center in two weeks?" "Wait, wait... are you planning on attending that?" "Perhaps I am. Rarity is going, after all, and it could be fun." When her sister began to snicker, the lunar princess gave her a confused look. "What do you find so humorous?" "I hope you can find somepony to make you a costume, Luna, because it seems like you're going to be attending a comic book convention." Author's Note Wah waaaaaaah. So that's why Rarity didn't like it.
(Extra) Interlude: In Which Discord Helps in the Most Annoying Way Possible(Extra) Interlude: In Which Discord Helps in the Most Annoying Way Possible "Hmmm..." A pencil, held in a firm grip by Twilight's purple magic, scribbled wildly on a piece of scrap parchment. She turned her gaze back to the area upon which she was experimenting. "It's missing something..." A flash of inspiration lit the alicorn's eyes, and a second spell conjured a wall of fire. She lobbed an apple through the hot field, causing it to catch fire and burn up almost immediately. "No, that's no good." She released an exasperated breath and dropped her head sideways onto the table. "Shoot, how am I going to do this?" An obvious solution presented itself to her, but Twilight stubbornly brushed it off. From upstairs, a voice called out. "Hellooo, anypony home?" "Down here!" the princess shouted back without looking up; the door to the basement opened, and Rarity hopped daintily down the stairs to join her friend. "Good morning!" the unicorn said. "How are yo—" "No, I can't go to Super-Con with you," Twilight said immediately. "Aw, why not? Don't make me go by myself!" "It's on Spike's birthday. If I missed it, he'd be devastated..." Rarity sighed sadly. "That is a noble excuse... Very well, just this once, I shall allow it." "No wonder they call you the Element of Generosity," was Twilight's sarcastic response. "I think I need to get out of here, my brain's beginning to fry. Would you like to see if there's anything Fluttershy wants to do with us?" "Dear Fluttershy is, in fact, already occupied," the unicorn said. "Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash took her to an amusement park in an effort to cheer her up." "Well, how about just you and me? We could get something to eat." "I'm afraid that I, too, have a full schedule. I need to start designing... costumes... for this abominable convention." Her lip curled in apparent disgust. "I'm sure it won't be that bad; I know plenty of awesome ponies who go to those things. I'd be more than happy to go with you if I wasn't already busy. To be honest, I've kinda wanted to attend one all my life." "Is that so..." Rarity's gaze drifted around the room, and she realized that it was messier than normal. "And what are you doing today, that has begun to 'fry your brain'?" "Oh, nothing," Twilight said. Her evasive answer immediately piqued her friend's interest. "Just a stupid experiment, it's not important." "Well, what are the details? Do tell." "You wouldn't understand..." When Rarity stared at her beseechingly, Twilight sighed and gave in. "Alright, fine. It's an experiment that tests the effects of chaos on magic." Please don't say it, please don't say it, please don't say it... "Oooh ho, I see. Does this have anything to do with a certain dragonequis?" Darn it. The alicorn set about cleaning up the mess she had made. "Ever since he used magic from myself and the other princesses to enchant that stupid frying-pan, I've been curious about it. He took pure magical power from four ponies, and somehow shaped it into something completely different. I want to know how he did it, and if there are other applications for this technique." "Forgive me for assuming, but it doesn't seem like your efforts are meeting with much success." "I can't figure out how to make things chaotic enough! I've tried heating, I've tried temporal tampering, I've even tried pleading! Nothing works!" A sly grin appeared on Rarity's face. "Have you tried asking Discord himself?" "Wh-wha-what?! No way! Absolutely not! I'll never ask that idiot for help!" "Methinks the mare doth protest too much..." A blush crept across Twilight's cheeks. "What are you suggesting?" "Oh, nothing... nothing." The unicorn walked to the steps. "I must take my leave, or else I shall never make any headway on these... costumes..." Once again, her lip curled. "But before I leave, might I suggest you swallow your pride and ask Discord for help?" "I already told you—" "If you're a true scientist, you'll be able to set aside your feelings towards him, and focus on the experiment." "But I don't even have any feel—" "Ta-ta! Have a good afternoon!" The door closed behind her as Rarity showed herself out, leaving Twilight alone with her conflicted thoughts. She's right, that this would be much easier with Discord's help... But what guaruntees that he'd want to help? He'd probably just make things more difficult, with his attitude. But isn't it worth trying, for the sake of science? Gaah, what do I do?! Suddenly, inspiration hit. "I got it!" The alicorn grabbed a quill and parchment and began to write a letter. Dear Celestia, I am currently conducting an experiment on the nature of chaos and how it affects a pony's magic. However, I have run into a wall when it comes to creating the actual chaos. If he is available, would you see if Discord is willing to lend a hoof? If he cooperates, his help would most certainly speed things along. Thank you, and I hope you are having a great day! Your Friend, Twilight Sparkle "Ha, there!" she crowed upon the note's completion. There's no way Discord will agree to do this! He'll say 'no', and I'll be able to relax, knowing that I tried! Perfect! She trotted upstairs to find Spike so that he could send the letter on its way. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "I'm pleased you decided to join me today," Celestia said to her sister. The two alicorns sat side-by-side in the throne room while holding court. "I needed to stretch my legs," Luna mumbled. "Regardless, I don't get to spend as much time with you as I want, so I'll take any excuse I can get." A sudden burst of smoke appeared, and a tightly-bound scroll dropped to the ground in front of the princess, who wasted no time in opening and reading it. "What does Twilight Sparkle have to say?" the dark alicorn asked tonelessly. "She wants... Discord's help?!" Celestia said, eyes widening with confusion. "I... I guess I'll tell him about this. Let me fetch a guard..." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Back in the library, a bored Twilight paged through a dictionary while Spike idly doodled. Every five seconds or so, she would glance at the clock before turning back to her reading. After approximately two hours of repeating this behavior, she slammed the book shut and clambored to her hooves. "Ha, I knew it. He's not coming after all!" "What are you talking about? I've been here for about an hour, now." Twilight's head snapped back and she looked up to find that an upside-down arm chair, in which Discord sat while casually sipping some kind of exotic beverage, was stuck to the ceiling. "An hour?! Why the hay didn't you say anything?! I've been just lazing around here, doing nothing while I waited for you to show up!" "Where's the fun in making things easy for you?" He dropped out of the chair and deployed a parachute, allowing him to float safely to the ground. "So why did you decide to actually show up? Is it just to make fun of me?" "Sparkle, as much as I enjoy getting on your nerves, that's not enough to make me willingly spend time with you. I'm only here because Celestia told me to, and arguing with her is one of the most irritating things I can think of." Twilight sighed and made a mental note to sarcastically thank the princess. "Whatever, let's just get this over with, then." She walked to the basement door and went down the stairs, beckoning to the dragonequis to follow. "I'm coming too!" Spike said eagerly. He darted after the alicorn and passed her, almost tripping her up. "This outta be good." Twilight laughed at his enthusiasm. "That's fine, but you have to promise to stay back; this could get dangerous." "What're you doing anyway?" the little dragon asked. While she answered the question, Discord stood behind her and mimed her actions in an exaggerated fashion. "I have decided to research—" When Spike began to chuckle at the dragonequis, Twilight whipped around to look at the source of the humor, only to find him leaning casually against a wall while he examined his fingernails. She slowly turned back to Spike, and as soon as she did, the mimicking resumed. "I want to learn about the reaction that occurs when a pony's raw magical essence passes through a stable field of pure entropic energy ." "Uuuhhh..." The dragon scratched his head in confusion. "You wanna run that by me again?" Before she could repeat herself, Discord spoke up. "She wants to shoot magic through chaos-y stuff to see what happens." "Ooh, I see, and you're the 'chaos-y stuff'." The dragonequis snorted. "Unfortunately." "If you two are finished, we have work to get done before next month," Twilight said. "See what I have to put up with?" he complained. "Fine, what does Her Highness wish for this lowly subject to do?" The alicorn ignored the sarcasm and pulled out a square, glass box with one missing side. "This is a cube that I've magically reinforced so that it can withstand any amount of stress. Your job is to apply a chaotic field over the opening—" "That little thing?" he scoffed, pointing at the container. "You've gotta be kidding me. If we're gonna do this, we're gonna do this right." He snapped his fingers, and the box tripled in size and warped into a cylinder. Twilight found herself pressed up against a wall by the giant-sized apparatus. "How did you do that?!" she demanded. "And why does it need to be this big?!" "It should really be another five times bigger than it is now. However, for a reason that I truly cannot fathom, I didn't want to squash you, so I made the sacrifice. Did you really think that your tiny little cube would be large enough to contain the results of your experiment?" "You could've said something first!" With a *pop*, Twilight extracted herself from her entrapped position. "And why is it a cylinder? What's wrong with the cube?" "...I like circles more than squares," Discord admitted, poking the ends of his forefingers together bashfully. "Don't judge me!" "Yeah, because that's the weirdest thing about you." She sighed, and turned to face the open-end of the container. "Are you going to put up the field or not?" "Somepony's feeling cranky. For your information, I already applied my magic; you're the one holding us up, Miss Prickle-Puss." Calm down, Twilight, she thought, taking a deep breath. Don't let him get to you; you're better than this. A forced smile appeared on her face. "Thank you." The pencil made a few quick notes, and then everything was ready. "I'm now going to perform the first trial. Wish me luck!" "Good luck, Twi!" Spike cheered. "I'll put out the fires," Discord added, earning a glare. A spark of purple light buzzed from Twilight's horn and slowly drifted towards the cylinder. A pony, a dragon, and a dragonequis watched intently as it passed the threshold, where hopefully something benign would occur. They needn't have worried too much—as soon as the magic entered the cylinder, it emitted a loud *pop* and turned into a duck. "Discord!" the alicorn snapped. "This isn't the time to be messing around!" "I don't know what you're talking about. You wanted to see what happens? That's what happens." Meanwhile, the duck had changed into a pastry. "Really?" She wrote furiously for a few seconds before turning back to the 'subject', which was now a pair of chopsticks. "It seems like... it converts energy into matter?" She glanced in the dragonequis's direction questioningly. "Psh, don't look at me, it's not like I know what you'll get when you mix something with chaos. That's half the fun!" "Gee, how helpful." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ An hour later, a pony passing by the library heard angry voices coming from within. "Can't you just be serious, for once in your life?!" "Can't you just relax, for once in your life?!" "I would relax, if you would cooperate so that we could get this stupid thing done!" "And how far would you be without me here, huh?" "Probably further than I am now! You've done nothing but slow this whole process down!" "Don't think I wouldn't rather be somewhere else. If Celestia hadn't made me agree to help—" "You keep saying that! 'Celestia made me do this', and 'Celestia told me to do that'; well, I'm as unhappy as you are that she forced you into doing this!" The voices faded as the two combatants lapsed into silence. "Sheesh, lovers' quarrels," the walking pony said, shaking his head before continuing on his way. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Phew." Twilight exhaled heavily and wiped a trickle of sweat from her face. "We're getting there..." They had been at it for four hours, and her notes had grown into an impressively large stack. "Can I go home now?" Discord asked without looking up from the comic he was absorbed in. "If you really want to go, then go," she snapped at him. "Hmmm... tempting, but if I went back before you were done, I'd never hear the end of it. Oh well..." Then why did you even bother asking? "I'm going to go get a drink, can I trust you by yourself down here?" "Don't weave me awone, mommy!" the dragonequis said in mock-terror. "I'm scawed of the dawk!" "Whatever... I'll be right back." Upstairs, Twilight poured herself a glass of lemonade and took a sip; a grateful smile spread across her face. She walked back out into the main room where a soft cushion awaited her royal posterior. One quick levitation spell later saw a plate of chocolate cookies at her side. What a stressful day... the alicorn thought; she took a large bite of cookie and grunted in satisfaction. What did Celestia think she was doing, making that pest come all the way over here? She knows I can't stand him, so why? Maybe he was getting on her nerves, and she just wanted him out of the castle... Yeah, that's probably it. A breeze wafted through an open window and caressed Twilight's cheeks; her eyes closed as she relished the cooling sensation. It was a peaceful day in Ponyville, due in part to the absence of Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie, two of the most boisterous ponies in town. However, even without them, the village was unusually quiet. Yes, it really is quiet today... Her eyes widened when realization dawned upon her. "Too quiet. DISCORD!" The princess darted back down into the basement, but paused when her eyes met a most unwelcome sight. Dozens of pieces of parchment, each one folded origami-style to resemble some type of animal, fought each other in a battle royale. While she looked on, paper was ripped to shreds, and one even burst into flames (how a paper swan accomplished this, Twilight would never know). Meanwhile, Discord sat on a throne and loomed over the entire spectacle, a huge smile on his face as he cheered on a specific combatant. "Yes, Bruce! Get 'em! That's it, tear him to pieces! Ye—no! NO! BRUUUCE!" He put a hand over his chest. "I'll never forget you, brave Bruce. Fare thee well—" "Discord." Twilight's quiet voice cut through all of the noise, and all of the surviving parchment-animals and the dragonequis himself looked in her direction. "What is all of this?" "Well, you were gone for such a long time, I got bored—" "I've been upstairs for three minutes, tops! Paper isn't cheap, you know! You'd better be willing to replace all of this!" "Yeah, yeah, if you say so." "Let's... let's just get back to work." The alicorn trotted over to her desk to peruse her notes in order to find where they had left off. "Okay, next on the agenda is—wait a minute." The wooden surface was disturbingly bare of anything that even resembled the data she had written down. "Where are my notes?" "Aha, about that... you see, I ran out of paper, and I simply had to have three hundred fighters for the origami melee, of course, so I—" "You're telling me that these shredded pieces of paper on the floor are the remnants of all of my efforts from the past few hours." I'm dreaming right now. That's what this is; it's a nightmare, and I'm going to wake up and be very, very happy that none of this ever happened. "Wow, you catch on quick! Celestia always says you're the smartest, but you've really outdone yourself this—uh, Sparkle?" Twilight's eyes rolled up and she collapsed in a heap on the floor. "You're still alive, right?" She didn't react. "I'll just, uh, take that as a 'yes'." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Ugh..." Twilight groaned as a lance of pain shot through her skull. "Where..." Her eyes opened and she found herself staring at her bedroom ceiling. "Why am I here..." Then, it all came back to her. The arguing, the fighting, the teasing, the pranking, the mocking, and, most of all, the destruction of her research... all of these things swirled through her thoughts, propelling the alicorn into an increasingly destructive rage. Her breathing quickened as her vision began to turn red. "No, I have to calm down." She took a deep breath and counted to ten before releasing it, but found that her fury had not abated. "A letter. I'll write a letter to Princess Celestia about this. I'll be ready to face... him... after that." Five minutes later, Twilight read over the finished product in order to make certain that it was acceptable to send. Dear Celestia, Sorry for writing to you for the second time today, but I need to get some things out of my system, and I can't think of anypony else who would be willing to listen. All day, Discord has been grating on my nerves. Apparently, it's his life goal to see how close he can push me to the edge without actually making me want to light him on fire. I was coping until the very end, when he destroyed the papers that contained all of the data from the research I had gathered while painstakingly enduring his presence. Needless to say, I find this behavior to be unacceptable, and I plan on sending him back to the castle as soon as I finish writing this letter. I actually kind of wish that you hadn't forced him to come here to help me out. Please don't take that as a criticism of your judgement, I'm just complaining here in order to calm down. Anyway, thank you for putting up with my poor mood, and I hope that your day is far better than mine. Your Friend, Twilight Sparkle The alicorn rolled up and sealed the letter before leaving her bedroom. "Twi!" said Spike, who had been waiting right outside. "Are you feeling any better?" "Would you send this to Princess Celestia for me?" she asked, ignoring his question. "I'm going to go have a... talk... with our guest." "Um, sure thing, Twi." A puff of green fire saw the note on its way to Canterlot. Twilight stomped down the stairs into the library proper to find Discord floating in mid-air while rolling a coin over his knuckles. As soon as he noticed her, the dragonequis dropped to his feet. "Finally! I was wondering when you were going to—" "You are leaving." She poked a hoof into his chest. "Right now. All day, you have done nothing but whine at me, make fun of me, mess with my head, hinder my progress, and worst of all, ruin my work." "How kind of—" "I'm not finished yet." His jaw snapped shut. "I didn't even want you to come here today. In fact, you were supposed to say no and refuse! I told the princess that it was a mistake forcing you to come here, so we can both rest assured, knowing that there will be no repeat of this incident. Now, get out, and I never want to see you in this library ever again." The room was utterly silent for a few seconds; neither Discord nor Spike (who had heard the entire tirade) dared speak, so intense was the frown on Twilight's face. Finally, the dragonequis snorted humorlessly and raised a hand in the air. "Just what I wanted to hear. See ya later." He snapped his fingers and vanished from sight. As soon as he was gone, Twilight released the breath she hadn't realized she had been holding, and all of the tension went out of her. She felt suddenly tired, as if the rant had taken all of her energy. "Wasn't that a bit... harsh?" Spike asked tentatively. "It needed to be said. I mean, I put a lot of work into those notes! To just destroy them like that..." "Well yeah, but..." The little dragon fiddled with his tail. "He did redo them for you..." "...He what?!" "I mean, I helped a bit, but Discord did most of the work. Here, take a look." Spike handed her a stack of paper that had been sitting on a nearby table. Twilight flipped through the parchment quickly, intent on finding any mistakes. Instead, she found that her data had been almost perfectly replicated; he had even finished the research for her, saving what would have likely been another five hours of work. Except for some goofy drawings spread throughout the pages (an example of which was a cross-eyed Twilight along with a speech-bubble that read, "Durr, I are teh dumbest"), the quality of the notes could be considered on-par with her own. "Spike," she said slowly, "why did he do this?" "I dunno, but—hurk—" He was interrupted by a monumental belch, and a scroll appeared in a burst of green smoke and fire. "—ugh, I hate when she does that when I'm talking!" The alicorn didn't even hear him, so absorbed was she in the letter. She unrolled it and quickly scanned the contents. Dear Twilight, I am sorry to hear that you are having such a horrible day. I shall be certain to speak with Discord about it when he returns; however, there is something that bothers me about the letter you just sent to me. You write that I "forced him to come here to help [you] out", but in actuality, I did no such thing. In fact, the details of your letter were barely out of my mouth before he left, saying something along the lines of, "that pony can't do anything by herself, can she?" I do not know all of the details of your conflict, but I hope that you can resolve it peacefully. Perhaps this letter will assist you in coming to a truce with him, but the choice is ultimately yours. Your Friend, Celestia "Ugh, I feel like such an idiot." Twilight smacked a hoof against her forehead. "What's wrong now?" ""Spike, I've made a really big mistake," she admitted. "I need to hurry and find Discord!" She darted to the door, but was stopped by her assistant's voice. "How do you know he's around here?" the dragon asked. "Can't he teleport, like, anywhere he wants?" "I have a feeling he didn't go too far." The alicorn hesitated and threw him a concerned glance. "Will you be alright while I'm gone?" "Yeah yeah, do whatcha need to do, I'll be fine." "Thanks, Spike, I'll be back soon!" The door slammed behind her, leaving the little dragon by himself. "Heh heh," he said with a chuckle, "and now Spike gets to raid the freezer." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Stupid stupid stupid, Twilight thought as she scanned the town from the air. That's why I should never lose my temper! If Celestia never actually told him to help me, then that means he's here because he wanted to be! Suddenly, she saw an apple tree in Applejack's orchard shimmer and waver before becoming totally solid once more. That's what I've been waiting for. The princess descended and approached the tree cautiously. Up close, its boughs looked as leaf-y and real as any other, but she knew better. "Discord," she said tentatively, "I want to talk to you." There was no response. "C'mon, I know you're there; I saw your illusion spell cycle from above." A few seconds passed, then the dragonequis's voice rumbled out. "Go away, Sparkle, I'm not in the mood for pointless banter right now." "I just want to apo—" His head shot out of the tree and stopped inches from her own; the normally dancing eyes were most certainly not as jovial as usual, and a snarl rippled on his lips. "I SAID GO AWAY!" he roared in her face. The standoff lasted for a few uncomfortable moments before Twilight backed away. "Alright..." she said, tears already building in her eyes. "I'm sorry." The mare turned and shambled off. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Psh, good riddance," Discord muttered as he watched Twilight depart. "Go to help a pony, and what do you get? Told that you're not wanted, that's what! I'm better off without that nonsense." He reached out and grabbed an apple, but it vanished from his grasp. "Ah, right, illusion." His gaze turned back to the retreating alicorn. Suddenly, he began to repeatedly smack the sides of his head. "No! I won't apologize! I am the lord of chaos and entropy, I don't do apologies!" A stifled sob reached his ears, and he realized that Twilight was actually crying over their fight. "Oh, for pete's... I'm soft. That''s it, I've gone soft; it's all over now. My reputation is kaput." With a snap of his fingers, the non-existent tree disappeared, and his serpentine body snaked through the air. Twilight yelped in surprise when the dragonequis landed in front of her without warning. "Alright, Sparkle, listen up and listen good; this is the only time you will ever hear me say this, so commit it to memory. You got that?" She nodded mutely. "I'm...s-s—" He let out a strangled, choking noise. "Ah, makes me want to gag... I'm s-s-s...sorry." All hints of sadness dropped from the mare's expression; in fact, all hints of anything dropped from her expression. "What." "You heard me!" he snapped. "I shouldn't have yelled back there. And I shouldn't have destroyed your research. Happy?" "I— I—what?!" "There, I said it. Now I'm going back to Canterlot, where I will no doubt encounter Her Majesty Princess Celestia so that she can give me the lecture of my life. Blah." He turned and made to leave, but a hoof on his back halted him. "It's... I want to apologize, too," Twilight said quietly. "Those things I said before, they were cruel, and unnecessary. Spike showed me the notes that you took while I was unconscious, and—" She seemed to be about to mention something else, but must have decided against it at the last second. "—and another thing happened, that showed me that I overreacted." "Hmm, Twilight Sparkle is saying she's sorry," Discord said, crossing his arms. "Too bad I forgot my recorder; this is the type of moment that should be immortalized." "Just shut up and accept the apology." "Alright fine, apology accepted. It's not like you can do anything to upset me, anyway." The two stood there awkwardly, not saying anything, until Twilight broke the silence. "Um, I have some other experiments I could use some help with... if you want to." "What?! More work?" The dragonequis groaned loudly. "Do you do anything else?" "Stop complaining, nopony's making you—" "Whatever, but next time we do what I want." The alicorn turned and began the long walk back home while Discord floated through the air above her head. "I get the feeling I wouldn't like anything that you find fun," she said. "Always with the insults," he lamented. "I'll have you know, I am a lover of poker, a very respectable game that many other ponies also enjoy." "Gambling's terrible! Why would you want to risk losing money based on chance?!" "And that, dear Sparkle, is why cheating was invented..." Their argument faded with the waning sunlight as they made their way back. Author's Note BONUS STORY! Don't ever let me hear that I'm not good to you, unless I do something that's not good to you, in which case feel free to say that I'm not good to you. Or not, whatever floats your boat.
