A Grownup's Tale

by VectorVineyard

Rating: everyone
Tags: Spike, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, Twilight Sparkle, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Human
Length: 4453

Bryan was once a fan of FiM, but has now grown up and has settled into monotonous college life. He is suddenly thrust into Equestria and wants to know why. Could he escape reality?

Bryan is a strangely neutral person. While he got into My Little Pony just as the show was gaining media attention, he never could call himself a brony. He would watch the show in secrecy, silently appreciating FiM's take on Japanese animation in darkened rooms with an earbud plugged in, glancing at the door every so often. He would visit fan-sites to see the art or read the occasional decent fanfiction. But that was years ago.

Now a college student and out of puberty, Bryan has long since given up on the naive hope that he could escape reality and join the characters he liked in the stories he appreciated. He let go of his unrealistic dreams along with the fandom. It is curious that now, after he has faced reality, does fate grant his wish. What will become of Bryan?

[A personal reflection of what once was a fan.]

Published 2013-11-05 05:50:05 UTC
Last updated 2013-12-03 04:02:45 UTC

Arrival, With Goal In Mind

A young man awakes to the blaring alarm on his phone. The phone is set on the desk across his dorm room, prompting him to get up and start his day to keep from waking up his roommate. The young man is able to lift his head full of brown, curly, bedridden hair and pace to the desk to shut off his alarm. Knowing that losing his momentum now would only lose time, he pulls a shirt and a pair of pants from his drawers, throws them on his bed, and pulls socks over his feet. He takes his clothes, as well as a comb, belt, and bottle of deodorant, to the bathroom to change. Moments later, the now fully dressed college student prepares a glass of water and grabs the mouthwash.

The young man's name is Bryan. He is 18 years old, fresh out of puberty, and a college freshman. The semester so far had been no more difficult than previous school terms because of his early scheduling, can-do attitude, and lack of distractions such as parties, games, and most social events. Bryan spent his time paying attention in class rather than talking to others, and as a result knows as much about people as any other bystander. By now he realizes his early mistakes yet accepts his loneliness. A circle of four to five people calls him friend, and the rest of his high school class accepts him as an acquaintance, yet at times he yearns for the companionship that only an intimate relationship can provide. Perhaps this yearning is the remnant of his fantastical wishes.

You see, Bryan used to enjoy a show called My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. He understood why those who called themselves "bronies" could appreciate the show - the animation style gave a nod to Japanese anime, and the characters were designed to be more realistic when it came to their quirks or problems. In a sense, those cartoon horses were liked because they were relatable; because ponies were more like humans. Bryan did not call himself a "brony" or openly talk about the show. All he did was watch the show and the content of the fanbase. He read fanfiction (only that which met his standards) and looked at the artwork and began to create an Equestria of his own, where he was a part of it. Where he could fight or defend or romance whomever he pleased. It was addictive.

But Bryan grew out of the fandom during the final summer before his move to the local university. One night, after finishing a fanfiction concerning Fluttershy and some generic character, Bryan began to think about his priorities. He thought about how impossible it was to think that he could ever join those horses, to escape the world for even just a little while. He thought about the other fandoms he grew out of in which he desperately hoped that some force would take him into fiction. He just stopped dreaming.

Bryan had once last dream of Fluttershy and moved to the next town in the following morning.

Now it has been four months since his first day as a college student. His very first semester was nearly over, and he had already applied to all his available scholarships online. He was passing all his classes and recording many scholarship hours and receiving paychecks, and he had settled into his routine. Wake up, get dressed and cleaned, go to class, eat, go to class, return to the dorm, and surf the Internet until it was time for bed. A lot of his time was spent daydreaming, ironically enough. But now, he dreamed about real things - about the TV club and his student job and what he would learn next in Web Page Design. He thought about things that were normal for a college student. For some reason, he was happy.

Bryan took his wallet and phone and student ID and left his room. He plugged in his earbuds and listened to light hip hop as he biked to class. It was Monday, so he would go to his Media History class and then his Statistics class before eating lunch and returning to his dorm to prepare for the next half of his day. He copied a powerpoint in history and fiddled with a calculator in statistics and ate a chicken wrap with fries. He unpacked his backpack and repacked it and checked his YouTube and Facebook and his saved webcomics for updates. He went to Web Page Design and then to Critical Writing, and then returned to the dorm once again. He packed for the next day and sat in his chair, catching up with the Internet and lurking forums.

And then something interesting happened.

Bryan sat at his desk refreshing pages when he had decided to take a walk to pass the time. He got his wallet and phone and student ID and went downstairs, passing by the lounge to see if he could pass the time listening to other people instead. No-one was there. He exited the building through the lobby and started walking down the sidewalk of fluttering leaves, stopping to chat with a friend of his for a few moments before parting. Bryan's voice was quiet; this was the first time he had talked outside of class for a long while. Bryan walked down the campus road and through all the shortcuts he had memorized. He walked up and down the quad and walked in and out of various buildings and eventually found himself before a dead end. He checked the time; surely something would have updated by now. But as he turned to go back to his dorm, blackness overtook him.

He fell for what seemed to be an eternity before waking up on a dirt path. He slowly got up and looked around him. He was on a road in a forest; behind him the road got narrower and darker, but in front of him the road led out into the light. In the distance Bryan could see a cottage with a grass roof with a small bridge crossing over a stream in the front. He saw that cottage and then he knew where he was. All the memories and dreams came back to him as he fell to his knees and realized what had happened.

Bryan had escaped reality. Bryan was in Equestria. He rose and walked to the cottage. His walk became swifter with each breath. He wasn't surprised that he was in Equestria. He had hoped for this, after all. Bryan already had a goal in mind. He was going to find out what power got him here. He wanted to know if he could control that power. If only he could use that power, he could escape the excruciating boredom of human life. His pre-pubescent dream had come true, but not fully. At least Bryan had hope again.

He reached the cottage and saw its resident closing the door behind her. She had bags on her back and her back to him. Bryan took the opportunity to sit down on the ground so as to not scare Fluttershy as much as he could standing up. She turned and noticed him and froze on the spot. This is good, Bryan thought, at least she isn't screaming.

"Please don't be scared. I'm not going to hurt you," he said in the quietest way he could, "What's your name? I'm Bryan."

The cream colored pegasus relaxed only slightly, but she understood that she was not in immediate danger. "I-I'm Fluttershy. U-um, I'm sorry for asking this, but w-w-what exactly are you?" she asked him.

"It's all right, Fluttershy. I am called a human. You could say that humans are like hairless, intelligent monkeys," Bryan replied, showing his hands as a comparison to monkey appendages. He thought about his next words and decided not to lie to Fluttershy about where he was from, "I'm from another world, if you can believe it. I sort of appeared here without rhyme or reason, and I would like to find out why."

She looked apprehensive. "Y-you seem calm for someone who just got taken to another world."

"You seem calm for someone who just met an alien. I don't mean any harm to you or this world. I just want to know how I got here."

She looked at me for minutes before finally settling down. "O-okay. Um, would you like to come inside?"

"Thank you, I would love to." While a year ago Bryan would have been a nervous wreck, now he calmly followed the pony into her home. There isn't time to get caught up in past fantasies, he thought, there's always the possibility that I could wake up in the real world any moment now. Fluttershy is a nice girl, and also a horse. I need to keep things realistic.

And so the young college freshman joined a cream pegasus for tea.

Author's Note

I had a daydream about going to Equestria after leaving the fandom. This is an expansion of that idea. There is no update schedule.

Tea With Ponies

Bryan ducked under Fluttershy's door to a rather nice-looking living room. While he gazed at the room, she walked into her kitchen to prepare tea. Near the door were some birdcages and a small drawer near the corner, presumably for seeds. Two rugs lay on the green wooden flooring with a stairway to the left and a fireplace to the right. In the back of the room was a couch and a chair, some lamps, and another door leading somewhere else. Looking at it all, Bryan felt a sense of belonging here.

"Oh dear..." Bryan heard from the kitchen, "That's right, I was going to get more tea in the market..."

"I can wait here if you like," he said. I could use the time to think, he thought.

"Oh, I could never leave a guest alone in my home," she replied, "I'm not sure how everyone in Ponyville will react, but I don't think it will be dangerous to bring you into town. I know somepony who could help you that lives there. We can have tea at her house."

Somepony. That's something I need to get used to again, you thought, She's referring to Twilight Sparkle. I suppose I have to keep myself from spilling my knowledge on Equestria.

"Are you sure they won't react badly? Someone could get hurt," he asked Fluttershy. This is a big risk, but she's willing to take it. Is she really so sure of this?

"Nopony in Ponyville would hurt a stranger. I trust them." Bryan could see the confidence in her eyes as she said it, and for a moment it baffled him. Trust is handed out cautiously in the real world. There's a clear difference in our societies. Perhaps I can learn something from Equestria.

He smiled at her. "Then I'll trust you. Lead the way." She smiled back and headed out the door, with Bryan following. Together they walked down the path into Ponyville. The old feelings he felt years ago were starting to come back. He wanted to stay here with these ponies, living out a silly life and forgetting his friends and family. Bryan really would have stayed here if not for his goal. He didn't want to merely live in one fiction; he wanted to travel across all fiction. Bryan wanted to learn from the creations of human writers. He wanted to change stories and see what would happen. Perhaps he could find something to benefit humanity and return to the real world. However, he would first need to confirm if what brought him here could be controlled. He would have to confirm a lot of things. For example, when was he? Twilight Sparkle had moved to Ponyville, but what she still a unicorn? The details would be sorted out when they got to the library.

As the human and pegasus walked through Ponyville, Bryan noticed the sort of reactions he was getting. Some ponies would simply stare in shock and others would run away screaming. A few ponies fainted. All Fluttershy could do was stare at the ground, cheeks flushed. They stopped at the fountain where a crowd of ponies stared at Bryan while keeping their distance.

"Um, the library is over there, inside that tree. Ask for Twilight Sparkle. You go on ahead; I'll go get some tea," Fluttershy whispered. He nodded and started toward the library doors. The crowd parted to let him through and crowded around Fluttershy when he was out of earshot. She's really sticking her neck out for me... I wonder how I could thank her? Bryan thought as he approached the great oak tree, the doors reaching up to his nose. He knocked on the door, taking a moment to sit down again so as to not scare Spike. He answered the door most of the time, right? He's small, but considering how Fluttershy reaches my shoulders, it shouldn't be a problem.

Spike indeed answered the door. "Welcome, how can I help..." Spike began as he stared at the human sitting cross-legged at the doorstep. The dragon looked as though he could reach Bryan's midriff standing up. He stared with his jaw to the floor, similar to Fluttershy's reaction.

"Hello, I was told by Fluttershy to see Twilight Sparkle. Fluttershy's buying some tea for the three of us," he tells the gaping dragon. He simply nods and lets him in, holding the same jaw-dropped gaze.

The inside of the hollow tree is lined with bookshelves carved into the tree itself, and a table made of what appears to be a tree trunk with a carved statue on top sits in the middle of the room. On the other side there are stairs leading to the upper level of the tree. There were a few chairs scattered around, but overall it felt empty when it was clean. It was almost as if the library felt more alive when books were strewn about.

"Who is it, Spike?" a familiar voice says from beyond the stairs, "I heard something about tea and - oh my..." A purple unicorn - So this is before the movie. - looks over to Bryan, eyes wide with curiosity. "Who, and what, are you?" He begins to introduce himself to Twilight Sparkle, but Fluttershy hurriedly rushes into the library and closes the door. The bags on her saddle are full of groceries, a bag of tea leaves poking out.

"Are you okay, Fluttershy?" he asks the panting pegasus. Twilight trots down the stairs with a look of confusion and worry.

"Yes... Everypony was just curious, that's all." she replies, "I-I don't think I've had that much attention before, so I'm a little woozy..." After she composes herself, Fluttershy sets her bags down and walks up to Twilight to explain the situation. After preparing some chairs and a small coffee table, Twilight sent Spike to prepare the tea while Fluttershy told the unicorn about her morning and how she met Bryan.

~~~~~

"...and I thought that while everypony would certainly be scared of him, I never thought that they would try to hurt him. So I took him with me to visit you. I thought that you would have an idea of what's going on," Fluttershy says, finishing her tea and explanation. Twilight hung on to every word while Bryan sat quietly and let Fluttershy do the talking.

"Well, I can't deny that this turned out to be a very interesting morning!" Twilight began, "But as for what brought Bryan here, I don't think I know of anything that could make travel between worlds possible, magic or otherwise." Fluttershy looked at Bryan with an apologetic look, but he reassured her with a smile.

Twilight continued, "For now your best bet is to meet Princess Celestia. She's the leader of Equestria and my personal teacher. If anypony knows about what's happening, she would." She frowned. "However, we can't get a meeting with the princess because of her duties abroad. It will be a week before Celestia returns to Canterlot."

"That's fine," Bryan replies, "I can wait as long as possible. This world seems much more relaxed compared to mine. In fact," he says, leaning back on his chair, "I actually wouldn't mind a little vacation to get to know some of the ponies here. A week sounds just perfect!" Twilight and Fluttershy smiled at this.

"I think you'll be a great friend!" Twilight says, "I'll get the guest bed ready for you tonight. In the meantime, why don't you go with Fluttershy to get acquainted with everypony? I'm sure they'd love to meet you!"

"Of course, I'd love to." Fluttershy and Bryan place their teacups on their saucers and make for the door while Twilight goes back upstairs.

"Aren't you nervous?" Fluttershy asks him.

"Only a little... But it's enough to get butterflies in my stomach," he replies. She smiles and opens the door, where a crowd of ponies await just beyond.

Author's Note

Thoughts are now italicized.

Reflection on Humanity

Bryan could make out a few familiar faces in the crowd that stood before him. He could see Pinkie Pie barely containing her excitement, Rarity and Applejack cautiously holding their sisters, and he could just see a cyan pegasus hiding in a nearby tree, probably waiting for an ambush followed by Rainbow Dash's typical "Spy!" accusations. He could also see Lyra with a wide grin on her face, and next to her Bon Bon looking astonished. He saw Cheerilee holding Snip, Snails and Scootaloo, and the Cakes - Have they had their foals yet...? - as well as Nurse Redheart with what looked like a patient she was escorting. They were all here, and they were all apprehensive and afraid. Fluttershy looked at Bryan and he nodded to her and stepped forward.

"Hello, everyone. My name is Bryan, and I'm... well, I'm from another world. If you're wondering how exactly I got here, I'm sorry to say that I couldn't tell you. I'm trying to figure that out myself. Twilight Sparkle suggested that I see Princess Celestia, but because she won't be back for around a week, I'll be staying here in Ponyville." He paused. The crowd wasn't looking any less afraid. "You're all apprehensive of me, I understand. You have good reason to. But I don't wish to harm you. I would actually like to befriend you all... if you're okay with that. If there's anything you want to know about me to ease your suspicions, please do not hesitate to ask."

"Here's a question," said Rainbow Dash as she poked out of the tree, "are you a spy?"

"Well," he replied, "I don't know how I got here, so even if I got a hold on some sort of crucial information, I wouldn't be able to communicate it to my species." He took on a sullen expression, "I'm not even sure if I can get back home at all." A few ponies started glaring at a sheepish Rainbow Dash as he spoke. "So, no. I'm not a spy."

Ages passed before another voice was heard. "I think he's A-Okay!" said Pinkie Pie.

"A real, live alien! That's so cool!" exclaimed Scootaloo.

"I believe Ponyville can benefit from an alien ambassador!" Mayor Mare chimed in.

Before he knew it, Bryan had the approval of the entire town. It's really that easy? All I have to do is look sad to eliminate any suspicion or doubt? He smiled and waved, dismissing the crowd. Pinkie ran off to prepare a surprise party, the Crusaders found each other in the crowd and trotted off with Applejack following behind, and everypony else went back to their usual places. The young man could spy Rarity excitedly galloping towards the Carousel Boutique, possibly inspired by the stranger's green canvas shoes, or his khakis, or his olive coat. He was about to head back inside the library when Rainbow Dash approached him.

"Sorry for calling you a spy, Bryan," she said with an apologetic look, "it wasn't cool of me to accuse you of anything."

Bryan smiled. "No hard feelings, miss. I would have had the same doubts if I were in your hooves, but I don't think I would have the guts to confront those suspicions! You're a very brave pony." She looked relieved and grinned back at him.

"Thanks! I'm Rainbow Dash, by the way. Fastest flier in Equestria!" she said, taking to the skies and performing a few aerial acrobatic tricks as she announced her title.

"The very fastest, huh? It's nice to meet you, Rainbow Dash!"

"Nice to meet you, too! We should hang out sometime so I can show you my latest tricks!"

"Of course. I can't wait!"

Bryan and Rainbow Dash shook hooves and parted ways. He went back inside the library to Fluttershy, Twilight, and Spike having more tea.

"That went well!" he said.

"Went well? You were great!" Spike replied. Fluttershy nodded in agreement.

"Pretty good for an alien," Twilight said. She had a clipboard and quill next to her. I hate to say it, but fan fiction has Twilight pegged when it comes to quizzing humans.

"You want to know more about humans?" he asked the unicorn. She nodded cheerfully and levitated the clipboard and quill in front of her.

"I came up with a few questions during your little speech. Are you okay with me asking personal stuff?"

"I'll let you know if you're getting into anything too sensitive. Ask away," Bryan said as he took a seat in the chair next to Fluttershy.

"Right! First question: What scientific achievements have humans done?" Twilight asked, patiently waiting for his answer with a smile on her face.

What should I start with? The moon landing? Cancer treatment? Maybe nuclear weapons as a "joke"? He thought for a few seconds.

When in doubt, use the Fuck-It Adjustment.

"Around fifty years ago humans brought a man to the moon using a rocket," he told the pony whose jaw dropped an inch for every word he spoke, "Now we have a giant telescope that orbits the planet and allows us to see the entire known universe. Other achievements include a worldwide network of computers that allows people from all over the world to connect to each other, breakthroughs in research for curing genetic diseases such as cancer, and I believe that humans are on the way to perfecting cloning and virtual reality." Everyone in the room was completely silent.

"You see, magic doesn't exist on our world, so in order to outmatch natural predators we developed our brains instead of our bodies. We're a scientific people. We managed to explain most of the universe and how it works with a single grand theory. We've reduced stars and gravity and nature and even emotion to mathematical equations and chemical reactions. We know about the particles that make up all matter. We've tapped into the unimaginable power those particles contain. We've created weapons that could destroy entire cities and machines that could build it all back together. We are able to look inside a person and determine what makes them sick without ever touching them. We can see how the universe began."

"And yet," Bryan continued, "we've had to take every last resource from our planet in order to make those tools. We are a brilliant and destructive species. Nature dwindles and dies while we create beauty with steel and silicon in order to justify our pillaging the planet. Our atmosphere fades because of our transportation systems. We've fought wars against each other over such petty things like money and power and property."

"Humans have gained so much knowledge that we can predict our futures. We crunch our numbers and make graphs and charts and we tremble at our data. We see more and more people getting obese from living sedentary lives, we see nations crumbling in the years to come, we see plagues devour our farmland and economic crises destroy our livelihood," Bryan looked from his teacup to Twilight's eyes, "Twilight, we can see our planet flooding and boiling up, we can see a nuclear holocaust, we can see our own sun swallowing up the earth in its dying years. We have several theories as to how the universe ends," he looked around to everyone, "You should be glad that you get to have some inexplicable force like magic to keep your world together, or else you would have to discover what really keeps everything in place and worry about how long your world will last."

Bryan took a sip of tea as he finished while everyone else stared in awe. Spike stood agape with a tray of cookies. Fluttershy looked terrified. Twilight was tearing up. That was a bit melodramatic. It's not like the sun will explode next week...

"That's horrible..." Twilight whispered, "How do you keep going, knowing all that?"

Bryan placed his cup onto the plate with a resounding clink. "I take the information into perspective. For the most part, I was born into a rather boring era. Nothing catastrophic seems to happen in the present, only the future. For example, the sun won't be dying for billions of years, and it's very unlikely that the few countries that possess nuclear weapons will actually use them. A few philosophers might cry in their sleep because of what humanity has done, but the rest of us just carry on and try to fix things as best we can."

Bryan smiled, "It kind of reminds me of all the stories that humans have written. All the worlds they've created have some sort of gimmick to make it fantastical and different from boring old Earth, like magic or advanced technology or parallel worlds. People often forget our world's gimmick: a constant, undying desire to keep moving forward."

Twilight rubbed the tears out of her eyes. "I suppose that's something, but..." She was interrupted by Bryan reaching out and patting her head.

"Hey, don't worry about me. I live in the now, not the later. I'm not gonna go crazy because I might die someday," he said to her. She smiled back under his hand.

"Okay."

"Do you still want to ask any questions?"

"...Alright. Can you tell me how the human body works?" Twilight asked, board and pen at the ready once more.

Bryan scratched his chin for a moment. "Let's see if I can remember where all the organs are..."

Author's Note

That got a bit depressing for a moment.