Author's Note

Yeah, my real life is being a bitch to me so I am slowing down my publish rate. It was either go to once a month or put the story on hiatus until things evened out again.

Later,
Bookish Devil

Celestia Comes Out of the Closet

Celestia was bored. There was only so long you can entertain yourself with a mop, a fez, and a scarf. While she was sure Delirium had been lying about having to stay in the closet for an hour; she had felt it was prudent to wait for her mind and body to resynchronize with the world around her. Her body thought it was the middle of the night, her mind thought it was early evening, and she was getting a feeling from the world around her it was almost time to raise the sun.

So she sat in the closet waiting for either somepony to find her or for her internal clocks to make up their mind. ‘This is why I use a chariot whenever I travel’ She mused, ‘Teleporting over distances always messes with my sense of time.’

Time crept slowly by as she waited. Random thoughts crossing her mind. On one hoof it was nice. She rarely got anytime alone, she always had at least two guards and a whiny noble near by. She began thinking about how this was better than being in court.

No nobles trying to back stab each other. No tax reform legislation. No Blueblood. No stick up their plot majordomo telling her she cannot have cake with every meal. No dealing with foreign diplomats. No Blueblood. No sitting on a throne for eight hours. No idiotic requests that should have never gotten to her. No Blueblood. No Blueblood.

The only downsides she could think of from her daily life was a lack of cake, tea, and guards doing exercises to watch. “Should have just taken that offer for tea. Loony as Discord was he always had good desserts.”

Celestia drifted off into daydreams of cake, pie, cookies, and other such tea treats when voices interrupted her. From the sound of things it was a maid and either a guard or a butler.

“Stop it! we’ll get caught.” A near breathless but happy voice admonished.

“Feather Duster come on how often is the palace this clean and this devoid of nobles? Nopony will notice if we disappear for a half hour.” The clearly male voice seemed to be winning as his voice seemed to get heady and happier as they approached the occupied storage cupboard. “And after what happened last night, I think we both need to do something to make us feel alive and safe.”

“Oh, all right but if we get caught you’re taking the blame.” The mare Feather Duster giggled.

Celestia heard the sound of the couple begin to kiss as they came closer to the door. She watched as the knob flickered green tried to turn then cut out. She heard a slightly muffled growl and could very well picture what was happening. One of them was trying to open the door but was too distracted by their partner to focus properly.

With a mischievous little smile appearing on her muzzle Celestia opened the door.
The look on the brown unicorn stallion’s face was priceless. Abject horror combined with chagrin, and with just a dash of embarrassment. His face. Oh, it was perfect wide eyes, shaking legs, and the poor guy was at half mast.

The white pegasus mare had her back to the door thus leaving her blissfully unaware of the diarch of the day. “What’s wrong?”

The stallion was frozen in place. Then his horn glowed and the door tried to close. Celestia just held it open watching as the mare finally broke off trying to keep the kiss going and noticed the look on the stallions face.

“What is it?” she asked him.

As charismatic as the stallion had been in convincing her to hide out for a bit and have some fun; his words failed him. Stuttering he began trying to talk through his terror. “It’s… It’s…. It’s… It’s.”

“It’s what?” The maid began to question, obviously angry that after everything he had done to convince her to do this that he frozen at the end.

The stallion wisely stopped trying to talk and just pointed a hoof behind the maid at the closet he had been trying to get into.

Rolling her eyes she turned to look over her shoulder only to come face to face with the princess of the sun. She blinked once as if trying to dispel a hallucination. When she opened her eyes again and Celestia was still there wearing an almost obscenely long multicolored knit scarf, fez jauntily tilted upon her head, and the mob was leaning against her side pinned under a wing.

Oh the look on her face was better than the unicorn butler's had been.

Her ears shot back and flattened themselves to her skull. Her eyes opened so wide it looked like they could have fallen out of their sockets and her pupils shrank to pinpricks. Finally her jaw dropped and her tail did a complete 180; going from half raised in excitement to tucked so far under her in fear that it looked like she grew a beard.

Celestia cleared her throat and asked in a perfectly conversational tone as if she had found them bringing her her morning tea instead of sneaking off to copulate in the closet. “Do either of you have the time?”

Neither of them spoke but the butler’s horn glowed and a pocket watch floated out of his uniform coat and between them. With a smile Celestia took the watch opened checked the time.

She tutted, snapping the watch closed she floated it back into the butler’s pocket. With a sigh she continued. “Fifteen minutes late to raise the sun. Oh, well carry on you two.” She winked at them and walked away from the closet leaving behind the mop.

She was just starting up the stairs when she heard the stallion recover and say. “You heard her come on in to the closet.”

She could only shake her head and grin with a knowing grin as she muttered. “Males.” Under her breath.