Champions of Mareth

A chill wind blows over my body, making me shiver, and shaking me from my slumber. I quickly reach out and grab my clothes, slipping my shirt onto my chest and huddling into it for warmth.

As I stand up to put my pants on, I realise how gross I feel: my fingers and thighs are still caked in my drying fluids. Looking around, I spy a river over by the edge of the camp, and jog over to it, carrying my bottoms along with me. Placing them by the riverside, I slip my shirt back off and lay it down beside them, before tentatively stepping into the water.

It's cold! Although, I'm not really sure what else I was expecting from it. Washing myself quickly, I hop out, and it's then that I realise I don't have anything to dry myself with.

The sun is starting to dip below the horizon, making the red tint of the sky look normal for once. If I try to drip-dry, I'll probably still be wet come night time, and then my character'll probably freeze to death.

Looking around for anything to use, I glance towards my tent. Maybe the camp gear came with a towel? It's a long shot, but I jog over to the tent and step inside.

It doesn't seem to be one of those bigger-on-the-inside deals, just a regular tent. On the floor lies a bedroll, and- yes, a towel! I grab it, and quickly dry myself off.

After I'm done, the towel doesn't seem to be any less dry or warm than it was before. I guess it's so that laundry doesn't become an integral part of the game. Speaking of which, I dash back to the riverside and grab my clothes, slipping into them quickly.

Now then, what to do? The clock on my sidebar says that it's about seven pm. There still oughta be time to explore before the night mobs come out.

Taking another look around, I realise that the campsite is sunken into the ground compared to the surrounding area. There are shallow inclines all around the perimeter, and while these won't really act like a barricade, at least they presumably make the camp harder to spot.

I head over to the side with the shallowest slope, and climb up the incline to get a look around. The campsite sits in what appears to be a wasteland, with nothing but dirt and rocks as far as I can see.

Which isn't actually all that impressive, since the render distance is tiny! I can see to about a hundred feet, and then the world just becomes enshrouded in fog! That's ridiculous! Ahh, but all right then, I'll play your game. Let's embark on the mission to solve the mystery of what's hiding a minute's walk away, shall we?

Marching off in a random direction, I almost don't spot the dark object lying on the ground in time. Flinching away as it snaps closed, its fangs crunching into the air where my leg was a moment ago, I bend down to examine the bear trap.

This must be what all those other poofs were from before, I realise. Looking around, I see that there are indeed a bunch more traps scattered around the camp. Not that they'd really do much against demons that can fly, of course.

Watching my step carefully, I manage to complete my journey away from the camp. Taking another look at my surroundings, I can see the semi-circle where my draw distance ends marked out with fog. Around me are a few patches of grass and some desiccated trees, which I can thankfully at least see to the top of. Maybe the render distance isn't limited upwards? I could see the imp in the sky, after all.

Turning back around, I notice that I can still see the light coming from my camp. Frowning, I decide to experiment. Taking care to avoid all the traps, I sprint back over to the campsite, and look round.

The trees that were just around me are now visible from here, the semicircle of fog remaining unmoved.

This isn't render distance, it's friggin' fog of war! The game just won't let me see a place 'til I've been there!

Okay, there's gotta be a point to this, I think, tapping my finger against my arm. Maybe you start off only being able to see wasteland, so that once you can see all the beautiful areas of the game from here, you'll appreciate them more? Way to bank on your players caring enough to get that far, game devs.

Well, there's no real sense in stopping after playing this far, so I guess I'll try to map out as much of the area as I can. With this in mind, I traipse determinedly off in a random direction.

The clock ticks over to eight pm, and I still haven't found anything. Well, I doesn't feel like it's been a real-time hour, but still.

Looking behind me, there fog forms a weird corridor leading to my camp. Maybe I should head back and try a different direction? It'd suck if I'd accidentally chose the way of endless wasteland.

All right, five more minutes, then I'll head back to camp. I turn to face forward once more, and... see my campsite straight in front of me!

"Aww c'mon, I looped round?" I cry, incredulous. I turn to look back once more, and see that the view behind me has radically changed. There is now a wall of fog in that direction, and my footprints appear out of nowhere a few steps back.

What's going on? Is this some kind of maze level? Or... wait, I got sent back to camp just as I was thinking about it!

I slap my palm into my forehead, incredulous. "Who in the hay maps the fast travel button onto just thinking about the place?!"

Well, at least there's fast travel at all. Given how big this waste seems to be, trekking back here all the time would not sound like fun.

Okay, one more time! Choosing a direction perpendicular to the path I had just cut through the fog, I set off again, determined to find some actual gameplay in this game.

After about another game-time hour of walking, I'm starting to think that maybe the entire game is just an empty wasteland, without even any monsters roaming around it. Tempted to just give up and go play Excellent Lettuce Gentleman instead, I open the menu, and hover over the Save & Exit button.

Oddly enough, it's grayed out. I give it a press, and a message appears beside it.

Can only save in safe areas

Yeesh, I guess I have to be back at the camp then. Well, it's not like it's so hard to get to. I just need to visualise it, and- hey, what's that?

A cool breeze suddenly brushes against my face, carrying the rich scent of pines and damp grass. I turn to walk against the wind, following the smell to its source, and find that the dry wastes suddenly give way to lush foliage, with huge trees climbing up into the sky, their bases surrounded by dense shrubs and vines.

As I gaze around at this, a message pops up in the corner of my HUD.

You have discovered the Forest!

Awesome, finally some progress! I'm about to step into the plant life, but pause, and look back down the path of fog behind me. It occurs to me that once I explore more area, I might lose this path, and with it the way to the forest. Unless I can fast travel here, I should mark out some kind of route.

Closing my eyes, I think about the campsite. A moment of dizziness passes over me, but it passes quickly, and I open my eyes to see that I've returned to camp.

"All right, now to see if I can get back there!" I close my eyes again, and picture the forest I was just in front of. I open my eyes, and... haven't moved. Great.

Oh, wait, hang on, a message just popped up in my HUD.

Cannot fast travel at night

Ahh, I guess it has gotten a bit dark. The sun's completely set now, and the sky is currently lit up by a creepy, blood-red moon.

Well, at least I know fast travelling there is an option now. Since the game doesn't seem to want me to do anything else right now, I may as well let my character sleep.

Heading over to my tent, I slip inside, and look around to see if pyjamas were also included in the camp kit. Sadly, this doesn't seem to be the case.

Oh well, I guess I can just sleep naked. I quickly slip out of my comfortable clothes, making sure the door on the tent is folded shut, and climb into the bedroll. As soon as my head hits the pillow, I feel my mind drift off into a relaxed slumber.

I step out of my tent, yawning, and stretch my arms above my head, basking in the morning sun. This game's really good at simulating sleep, it seems.

Realising that I'm still naked, I quickly dress back into my comfortable clothes, and walk to the edge of camp, wondering how to proceed.

I could explore more of the waste, hoping to find another location, but I was bored sick of that from yesterday. No, for now I'm going to do something actually interesting, and check out that forest.

I try to picture the lush trees in my head, and smile as I feel the world shift once again. It seems to be making me less dizzy each time it happens, too.

I open my eyes, and before me is rich greenery. My fast travelling seems to have spawned me at a different area of the forest than I was previously at, since I don't remember there being such a clear opening, with its own dirt path, no less, presenting itself when I first encountered it.

Oh well, no skin off my nose. I crack my knuckles, and step into the dark shadows of the forest.