Shrek is best pony

by El Manana

Rating: mature
Tags: Big Macintosh, Random, Crossover, Sex, Main 6, Gore, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Other, Spike
Length: 941

Play time is ogre

Twilight Sparkle and Spike go against the ogre lord himself, but don't worry, it'll all be ogre soon for them

Published 2013-11-10 04:00:05 UTC
Last updated 2013-11-10 04:00:05 UTC

It'll all be ogre soon

"Dear all mighty lord Shrek give me a good flight today, Shrek is love Shrek is life," Rainbow Dash said her daily prayer after a breakfast of onions and milk. She then headed outside to begin her stunts, she was confident that she would be able to pull them off as she recently converted to the worship of Shrek.
"What a beautiful day," she said, "Shrek, thank you".
She reared up then shot off at super sonic speeds. She does amazing tricks that even the wonder bolts would have trouble doing if they could do them that is. She had Shrek to thank.

*At Sweet Apple Acres*

"Oh whew boy Shrek sure was generous," Apple Jack said looking at all the fresh apples, they were redder than ever, bigger then ever before, and they sure looked tastier then ever.
"Well would you look at that big mac," Apple Jack said pointing out at the fields, "Shrek has surely blessed us".
"Eeyup," Big Mac responded twirling the piece of straw in his mouth around.
"Too bad Apple Bloom is at school," Apple Jack then went to get a bucked to begin her long day of work.

*Fluttershy's cottage*

"Angel Bunny you know that Shrek would want you to eat these onions, they're good for you," Fluttershy tried to get Angel to eat onions the holy food of Shrek. Angel hesitantly took a small piece of onion unsure of whether or not he was going to try it. Angel finally decided to try the holy food. He suddenly grew a huge grin because he was the more awaken by just one of the many gifts from Shrek.
"I knew you'd like it," Fluttershy said nudging Angel with her head which Angel responded to by smacking her across the face and hoping off.
"You're the joker Angel," Fluttershy shouted rubbing her cheek.

*Sugar Cube Corner*

"ORDER 24 READY!" Pinkie Pie cheerfully shouted throwing a box up on the front counter.
"Oh boy I've been waiting for these for ev-" the light blue stallion stopped as he opened the box to find it was filled with onions.
"Umm ma'am I believe you mixed up my order," he said as he slid the box over to Pinkie at the opposite end of the counter.
"Nope one dozen onions!" Pinkie beamed.
"Umm I ordered one dozen cupcakes ma'am," the stallion said very confused," this isn't what I want".
"Yes but it's what you need," Pinkie said extremely close to his face then she slid away into the kitchen touching his cheek by outstretching her arm several feet.
"Uh huh," is all he could respond before paying and leaving with his order and removing Pinkies impossibly long arm.

*Rarity's boutique*

"Yes this is perfect," Rarity said holding up a green shaded fabric.
"The ogre lord shall be pleased with these offerings!" Rarity beamed imagining Shrek giving her a Shrekoning pleasing the one and only ogre lord.
She then put some dress design in her saddle bag and trotted over to the post office to send her latest ideas to the Canterlot fashion agency.
"They can't resist Shrek designs," Rarity smiled as she handed Derpy the letter and giving her a few extra bits as a tip.
"Have a good day!" Derpy waved as Rarity walked away.
"Have a shrektastic day," Rarity responded heading back home to get ready for a get together that would be taking place at Twilights house/library later that day.

*Later that afternoon*

"Welcome girls," Twilight greeted the guest at the door then showing them in.
"Oh yea movie night!" Dash exclaimed exited, "I say we watch Shrek the best movie ever made!"
Everypony nodded exept Twilight.
"I don't like Shrek, in fact he's pretty dreck," Twilight said in a heavy british accent.
"Yea what about Jimmy Neutron, Jimmy Neutron is love Jimmy Neutron life," Spike said in a horrible quuad impersonation. Both of them were drecks beyond saving.
Suddenly the air smelled heavily of onions and a green mog rolled in.
"Yes it's happening," Apple Jack said taking off her hat and whiping a tear from her eye.
Suddenly a huge green figure appeared in Twilights library. It was Shrek!
"You should checked yourself before you shrieked yourself laddeh," Shreks voice boomed.
He then took off his pants revealing his 8 meter eshecksion. He then grabbed Twilight and Spike in one hand and pierced both of them through the abdomen with his huge shrock.
"Play time is ogre laddeh!" Shrek yelled as he thrust and splattered their guts every where as the other five ponies cheered on their ogre lord.
Shrek then near his climax crushed the two into a tightly compact ball and shoved it into his urethra and aimed his shrock at the moon and fired the the two at the moon where they shall remain for one thousand years.
"Is it over?" asked Fluttershy marveling at the green god Shrek.
The other five non-dreck ponies where all shocked that Shrek the one and only ogre lord was in their presents, it truly was an honor.
"It'll be ogre when I say it's ogre laddeh," Shrek said as his shrock grew another 8 meters.
He picked up the five ponies and impaled them all on his huge member killing all of them instantly. He thrust his mighty ogre cock in and out, blood was shooting everywhere. He then came his swampy onion semen and it was so holy that it brought all of them back to life.
"That'll do, that'll do," Shrek said as he disappeared in a green mog.

Shrek is love

Shrek is life