Twinkies or Ponies?
“Dude, save me, I’m gonna fall off!”
I looked at the stallion in front of me, well technically he was dangling off a stick that was connected to a cliff. I glanced to the right to see a box of twinkies, the last one from Maremart, taunting me. It too, was dangling off the cliff on a stick that could break at any moment.
‘Who should I save? The twinkies or that pony that I have never met before, I thought about it quickly.
…
I made up my mind to save the precious twinkies. I started towards the twinkie box ,before the stallion yelled, “Are you serious! You are putting a box of treats before a pony’s life!?”
I looked back at the stallion before saying, “Yes, does it look like I give a fuck about you? I’ve never met you before, besides what am I suppose to do? Save the twinkies and your fat ass too? As far as I can see, the twinkies are more valuable than your fat flank.”
The stallion replied, “Can’t you just use your horn and levitate me and the twinkies to safety?”
I ignored that statement before crying out, “Oh I am so sorry Edward, for I can not save you! I can’t reach you in time, the twinkies will have to do!”
“Dude! Are you fucking with me! Stop messing around and save me! I have a twenty prostitutes and 37 kids. I also have so much to live for as a lowly servant.”
“Fine I’ll help you, right after I save the twinkies.”
“WHAT!”
I reached out with my magic and retrieved the twinky box causing the stick to break. I saw the stick fall into oblivion as I opened the twinky box. The sight of twinkies almost made me orgasm. I picked one up, looking back at the stallion.
“Well? Help me, you got your damn twinkies!”
“Here, help is on the way!”
I threw the twinkie at the stallion’s face causing him to flinch and lose his grip on the branch.
“AHHHHH” yelled the stallion as he fell to his death.
“God dammit twinky, you were suppose to save him. Ehh, who cares.” I picked up another twinkie and opened the plastic wrap. I ate it and savored it.
r twinkie and opened the plastic wrap. I ate it and savored i
