Chapters View Online
1-Speak Softly, But Carry A Big Stick-Adventure
Ambassador Clavipes was clearly scared as he gazed at his Queen in the anteroom.
"Your Majesty, there are times when unwelcome advice has to be given for your own good. If you go out there and say what you want to say to the Griffin King, you could end up in his dungeons or worse."
"Nonsense. An average changeling or pony or griffin would, but I am a Queen in my own right and you an ambassador. I know that there are those who consider griffins no more then violent savages, but they are as intelligent as any of us, and they keep to the conventions of basic diplomacy. Whilst we will probably be declared persona non grata, we will be given two days to pack up our embassy and leave the Kingdom of Griffonia in peace. Should that happen, I will find you an equally good diplomatic post. Your career will not suffer because of anything I say here, I give you my royal word on that." She turned and strode into the royal throne room where the aged King of the Griffins waited, perched vulture-like upon his throne, which was made of beaten gold, and set in the shape of an eagle. He was far from alone, two griffin bodyguards in the armour of the royal guards stood by with halberds, and several councillors were also present. Chrysalis bowed slightly and received a nod of the head in return.
"Your Majesty, my...my spies have informed me that you are planning to invade Equestria and annex as much of it as you can. I ask you, as one monarch to another, please do not make war in this way. War is a waste of lives, of money that could be elsewhere, of time, and love finds it hard to survive in war...and that is a direct threat to the survival of everyling in my Hive."
The king gave an angry hiss through his beak. "Impossible, I have been planning this war for far too long to let you take it away from me...insolent insect."
"Everybody dies," said the Queen, "but some die sooner or later, and if you mess with me, you mess with my entire Hive. There are changelings within your army and court, and if you go ahead and do this, you will spend the rest of your short life in fear that every royal councillor, every general, every royal guard or castle servant, even the lowly ones who clear your dung away, could be a changeling plotting your assassination or your kidnapping and replacement. We do not commit such a killing or kidnapping of someone of your royal rank lightly, but when our vital love supply is threatened by war, all options are on the table."
Every griffin stared hatefully at her, and she had to keep her emotion gathering sacs firmly closed to avoid nausea or worse from all the negative feelings that were aimed in her direction. The griffin guards raised their lethal halberds and started slowly advancing towards her with the clear intention of hacking her into pieces.
"Stop," called the Griffin King. "She is a monarch in her own right on a scheduled royal visit, and the rules of diplomacy must be obeyed." Reluctantly the guards returned to their places. "Tell me, your Majesty, why should I not invade your lands instead for this outrage?"
"Apart from the threat posed by my spies to your royal person, our land on the surface is hot and dry and waterless except for one river. Your army would have to march or fly close to it, and every night most of it would have to be on sentry duty to avoid changeling infiltration. Our Hives are either very well hidden or true fortresses in their own right, and we are masters of the ambush. And if need be we can melt away and avoid battle until your army runs out of food, as it cannot feed on love like ours can."
"As I said before, I respect the conventions. Your diplomats are now persona non grata, at least for this year anyway-they have forty-eight hours to evacuate their embassy and leave the Kingdom of Griffonia. You too must leave, and do not return to my country without my permission. Every changeling in the open will be given the same amount of time to leave, any changeling caught spying will be executed as a spy. And I will think long and hard about what you have said today. Farewell, Queen Chrysalis."
By sunset, the Queen and Ambassador Clavipes were flying towards the Griffionian border with the rest of the Changeling diplomatic staff. "Is what you said true, your Majesty? Have we really penetrated the Griffin armed forces and the royal court itself?," the ambassador politely asked his monarch.
"Sort of, we have two at a high level, and a handful at a low level with jobs like cooking the food and cleaning the sheets, but nowhere near as many as I suggested. Knowing this particular King, he will grow suspicious of almost everyone around him and perhaps launch a purge of his army and administration. Either he will himself be overthrown, in which case the griffins will be too busy with their own affairs to invade anywhere for years. Or dozens of his best officers will end up chained up in his dungeons awaiting execution or hard labour, and his grand griffin army will be greatly weakened and it will take years to train capable new officers to replace them. Either way, Equestria and the rich love that it contains is safe for now from the horrors of war, and our Hive can continue to feed in peace. My only regrets would be if any of our spies really were uncovered and killed because of what I said to the King today."
Author's Note
I got the idea from reading Equestria-Total War, and thought that since war was so disruptive to the gathering of love, changelings would want a lid put on it if only to keep their stomachs full.
2-The Trial of Queen Chrysalis
2-The Trial of Queen Chrysalis
It was evening in the Badlands, and changelings from all the Hives of the continent had flocked to see the trial of Queen Chrysalis by the rulers of five of the other major surviving Hives. From the Kingdom of Griffonia came the amber-shelled Queen Carapace of the Meganeura Hive, which specialized in extracting the fiery love of the griffins. Griffin love was both harder to get, and had a strong unique taste which put off most changelings, so the Meganeura were generally unchallenged in their territory and as such got on rather well with changelings from other hives because of this.
From Western Equestria came the purple-shelled Queen Miasma of the Formica Hive, whose territory stretched from Filliydelphia to the border with the Buffalo tribes, and whose changelings had been engaged in a nasty little undeclared war with those of Queen Chrysalis over territory for several years. She smirked to see Chrysalis brought so low.
From Germaneigh came Queen Phantasma of the Diptera Hive whose shell was a deep red. She and her changelings so rarely came to Equestria that Chrysalis knew little of her and her ways.
From Cloudsdale came the white-shelled Queen Mysteria of the Lepidoptera Hive which claimed control of the pegasus sky cities. In exchange for her changelings staying off the ground, the other Hives more or less accepted her control of said cities, although pegusai who lived on or near the ground were fair game for changelings from other hives.
The last Queen to serve on the tribunal was the green shelled Queen Crocodillia of the Digderidooia Hive whose territory was that owned by the Buffalo tribes and a few wandering ponies and griffins. The Changeling Queen of Prance had excused herself as she and Chrysalis were firm friends, whilst the Queen Melitia of Saddle Arabia was seriously ill with a Cordyceps infection and her doctors were plying her with the finest Camel love and fighting desperately to save her life.
"We will have order here, we can hardly hear ourselves think," snapped Queen Carapace. "The next Changeling to speak out of turn will lose his or her love rations for two days." There was silence. "Queen Chrysalis, in invading Canterlot as you did, and without even ordering your Swarm to invade and fight disguised, you have made our race undeniably public instead of a rumour, an old mare's tale, and therefore endangered all of us, from the Queens at the top of our society, to the most lowly drone and the smallest grub. You are charged with High Treason against Changelingkind. How do you plead?"
"Not guilty."
Queen Miasma stood up to address the tribunal. "My fellow Queens, I have it on good authority from a spy in Princess Celestia's court that because of Queen Chrysalis's attack on Canterlot, thousands of bits are now being spent on a new spell, a spell designed to detect our kind when we are undercover. Should that spell be properly developed, it would be a disaster and thousands of families where the mother or father is a changeling would be forcibly broken up. Starting romances with other races would be near impossible, except for the few who genuinely like changelings. There are those that do, but not enough to feed most of us. Queen Chrysalis, what do you have to say for yourself?"
"I had to do what I did, because I found out too late that there was a black market circle that was siphoning off the love from my hive's central store, to the point where there just was not enough for everyling. I punished those responsible severely with six months of short rations, but punishment would not fix the problem. I sent the police around to try and find the stolen love but it had been consumed already by changelings unknown. I tried to trade love from other Hives without much luck. Queen Phantasma turned my envoys down without comment, Queen Melitia was and still is sick and needed all the love she could get to save her own life, Queen Crocodillia could not be found, Queen Mysteria's changelings drove my envoys out by force, and you demanded a large chuck of my territory in exchange for help. Only the Queen of Prance would come to my aid. I'm far from perfect and my tactics could have been better, but what was I supposed to do? Break the very First Article of the Changeling Code by coming out into the open and asking the ponies for help? Then I would be in just as much trouble for that."
The Queens retired to a room to talk in private.
"She does have a point, you know," said Queen Carapace. "All of us have a deep attachment to the members of our own Hive. She was just trying to feed them and prevent being overthrown. Starvation leads to rebellion if it is left unchecked for long enough."
"Well, I for one think she should be executed , all of our Hives are on short rations because of her idiotic invasion of Canterlot," Queen Miasma replied angrily.
"And if she was executed or permanently exiled, who would benefit? Who would take over all of her territory? You would. All of the rest of us are either too far away or confined to the sky cities of the Pegusai," Carapace replied. "You want more power for yourself. Besides, except under the most dire circumstances, Queens do not kill other Queens, it would set a precedent that might see your head on the block one day. Be careful what you ask for, Miasma."
"Why not compromise?" Queen Crocodillia suggested. "Yes, her actions were not properly thought through and have brought trouble upon us all, so she should be punished, but her heart was in the right place. I suggest that she forfeit her territory for one year and be exiled to Prance, but at the end of that time her territory should be restored, and that all changelings, not merely Miasma's, be allowed to enter it until then. That way Chrysalis will be punished but not too much, and it'll do something to enable us all to get as much love as we can. I move for the above sentence. What do the rest of you say?"
One after the other the other Queens voted for it, Miasma very grudgingly.
"By tomorrow you must appoint an officer to look after your hive, gather your possessions and set off to Prance. If you ignore this sentence, Miasma may indeed get her wish, but I don't think you will. No hive is to attack you as you leave-that means you, Miasma. On behalf of us all, I declare this sentence affirmed," Queen Carapace said. "Farewell, Chrysalis."
Queen Chrysalis lay on her royal bed and cried. Where once there were busy, bustling changelings digging new shafts and tunnels, selling in the Hive's internal markets and generally going about their business, now there were only the dying and the dead, many of them mere shells covered with the dreaded cordyceps fungus, one of the most horrible ways to die that was possible for a changeling. And it had all started so well...with most of the love coming in from the infiltrators rather then those they had kidnapped and cocooned. Many infiltrators didn't in fact need to kidnap anyone at all, they just assumed identities of their own. Kidnapping was only generally done either to protect the changeling race as a whole, or to replace those in high places that could aid their changeling kin.
The problems had started when the tentacles of the Changeling black market had reached into the central love store. Every hive of any large size had it's own criminal underworld that was generally tolerated as long as it didn't do anything outrageously bad. After all, it provided things to the royal subjects that were forbidden to them by their monarch, be it firecrackers, illegal weapons, drugs or...extra love rations. Small scale, this was not a problem, but by the time the Queen found out what was happening, over half the Hive's love that was meant for a year had been stolen. The Queen's police went all over the hive with royal warrants looking for the stolen love but most of it was never recovered, often being quickly consumed as soon as the guilty ones heard the knock on the door.
Faced with famine, something that was one of the few things that could make changelings angry enough to consider removing their monarch, Queen Chrysalis asked the nearby Hive Queens to help. The Griffonia Hive point blank refused-griffin love, it was said, was hard to earn and the Hive had nothing to spare. The Miasma Hive was willing, but asked for half of the Chrysalis Hive's territory in exchange, something that the Queen angrily turned down. And relations with the Phantasma Hive were too bad even to ask for some of their love. Trading openly for love with the outside world was a major breach of the Changeling Code, so, reluctantly the Queen called her generals together and plotted the invasion of Equestria, a country whose love reserves were legendary. Excitement buzzed through the hive-it would be a love raid to end all love raids. Everyling would be able to feast on as much love as they could fit in their stomachs for the rest of their lives. That was what they thought, but it had not worked out that way at all.
When they were blown out of Canterlot, ironically on a wave of love, many of the changelings had been killed when they plummeted to solid ground. Many others had received cuts and nicks of various kind from crash landing in trees, with only those who hit the lakes and rivers being unharmed by their catapulting from Canterlot. All their infiltrators in Canterlot apart from one who was away on holiday at the time were lost, and could no longer bring love back to feed the hive. Worse was to come. A spell was created after a couple of weeks to uncover changelings and those in Baltimare, Manehatten, Ponyville and other towns and villages were routed out. Not just Chrysalis's changelings either. Miasma's and Phantasma's and, when the spell was shared with the griffins, Griffonia's hives also suffered greatly because of Chrysalis's folly, much to their annoyance. Not a hive would or could share any of their love, as they were all now on short rations because of Chrysalis's actions.
Chrysalis did her best...she authorized love raids on any ponies or griffins she could capture; which meant they armed themselves and moved around in large groups. She shortened the rations to the bare minimum for health, but there was still very little love to go around. And with her changelings injured and hungry, the cordyceps fungus came. It was in the earth and got into many of the changeling's wounds when they had been smacked into the ground earlier. The immune system of a healthy changeling could kill the cordyceps, but weakened as they were, the fungus was able to grow inside their bodies and suddenly explode, scattering blood and spores everywhere, leaving the victims near death and sheathed in white threads. And Chrysalis could feel the agony of the victims through her hive-mind link until she turned it off in despair. My whole hive is dying, and there seems to be so little that I can do about it. If I had not kept strictly to the Changeling code I could have traded for the love. The ponies had so much of it, surely they could have spared a little bit for my hive of desperately hungry changelings?
She walked through her hive, finding nothing but dead and dying changelings covered in fungus, totally love-drained and dead captives hanging there in the cocoons and green eggs that would never hatch. Except for two, that had some love from her last captive that was still alive. I will take these two and fly away to somewhere far from here, as this place is nothing but a death-trap now. And in time they will become the generals of a brand new hive when my hive rises again from the ashes. She gently picked them up using the magic from her horn and deposited them in her royal saddlebags, then said a prayer aloud for the souls of all her deceased changelings. "My heart has joined a Thousand, for my Hive stopped living today." Then with a whirr of her wings she left the place of death behind and flew out into the warm bright sunlight.
Author's Note
I got the idea from a very real fungal disease that affects insects and thought-what if it was capable of infecting badly injured and sickly changelings as well? Obviously it could only reach plague proportions in a seriously malnourished hive.
Hearth's Warming Eve-Slice Of Life
It was Hearth's Warming Eve, and it was not only in Equestria that everypony had been preparing to celebrate the special day and the coming of Santa Hooves. In the Badlands, so inhospitable on the surface, everyling had been busy preparing for the celebration as well. Queen Chrysalis proudly pranced through the central hall of the hive. Normally this large space was open to everyling at any time of the day or night, but tonight every door to it had been locked and guarded, because it was here that a communal feast had been prepared for the next day. Normal changeling fare for those who were not undercover in the outside world was a grey fungus that tasted a lot better then it looked, and a small amount of decanted pony love from either the cocoons of captured ponies or the central love store in the middle of the hive. But tomorrow was Heath's Warming Eve, and far from the eyes of ponies or gryphons or zebras the changelings would be enjoying it in their own way.
There was roast Hydra, a beast that was not easy to overpower even when you could change your own shape. It had been brought to ground in the swamps of the Great Stench two days before, overpowered by a great many changelings armed with hunting crossbows, cut into large pieces and brought back to the hive. From early the next morning the royal cooks would cook it, gild it with pure gold leaf-the gold leaf had to be pure, otherwise it would be a poison, and serve it up not just to the Queen but to everyling. There were other kinds of fungus, rarer and harder to grow but much more tasty to the changeling palate. There were Hearth's Warming puddings and mince pies brought from the outside world in large numbers by the infiltrators. And of course, there was the love, it would not be a proper feast without the love.
There was warm, spicy Griffin love, a love much prized amongst changelings because of how hard it was to get hold of. Griffins, with their beaks and talons and combat skills were a lot harder to overpower then the other races of Equestria, and not many of them hung in cocoons in any of the changeling hives. There was one exception; a hive that preyed exclusively upon griffins, and lived a claw to mouth existence without enough to trade with other hives. A pity for them; if they had enough to trade, they could become the richest of the hives. Not only were griffins hard to overpower; the other way to infiltrate, taking the shape of a random griffin, didn't work very well. Ponies leaked love in many places and it could be gathered in small amounts without the ponies even being aware of it , griffin love had to be earned, and griffin courtship could take years.
There was plenty of sweet pony love of course, and zebra love too. There was the love of the Buffalo, a love that tasted like beef jerky and lasted as long as well. There was Crystal Pony love from the far north that tasted like boiled sweets. and Minotaur love that was almost as hard to get as the love of the griffins. There was the love of Hydras for their young; to gather it a changeling had to take the shape of a baby hydra and enter a hydra's nest, with fatal results for the changeling if it messed up. With all this love in one place, the guards were licking their lips, and had not been given the keys to the hall that they were guarding, in case they should sneak in and devour it. Even from outside they could sense it, and it was enough to make both their stomachs and their hive stomachs rumble. The keys were attached to the Queen's belt for safety.
The Queen left the hall, locking it after her, and went to her quarters where her royal sleigh waited along with eight trusted guards to pull it. It was the tradition for nymphs and a few adults to spin sacks and hang them outside, and the Queen would personally take on the role of Santa Hooves and fill them with little gifts and small amounts of love, something that could be done within only three hours or so. There would be time to get a few hours of sleep before the celebration tomorrow. As well as the feasting there would be carols and dances and a play about the First Changeling and a lot of fun would be had by all. Last of all there would be a public prayer for the souls of the dead and for better luck next year.
It would be a bittersweet celebration after the disaster of the Canterlot invasion, as there would be empty seats in many places due to the deaths of those unlucky changelings killed by being flung into something hard. There would be many orphaned grubs and nymphs who had lost one or even both of their parents. But tomorrow the Queen was determined that even they would be able to enjoy themselves as much as anyling.
Hours later, the Queen settled into her royal bed with it's multiple pillows and muttered to herself " To all a good night."
The next day there was much chittering of pleasure as presents were opened and songs were sung, and the Queen threw open the great hall to her subjects. For once hunger was a bad memory and rationing forgotten as much food and even more love was consumed and many a belly swelled, and a happy time was had by all in the Chrysalis Hive. Not a single Changeling would have to go to bed or on guard duty hungry that night. Such was the case in every Changeling Hive in Equestria and the surrounding lands and all over the planet wherever there were changelings.
Author's Note
I wrote this on Thanksgiving and wondered how Changelings would celebrate a major holiday.
"Had we never loved so kindly, had we never loved so blindly, we would never be broken hearted."
Queen Chrysalis bowed her head low in front of the pyre where the body of her beloved mother Queen Anisoptera lay, her chitin now grey with age, her eyes now dark in death, never to open again. My mother, my dear mother who made me who I am today. Who shared her own love with me when I was ill as a little pupa, emptying her hive stomach to make me well again even at the cost of hunger for days. Who taught me the Changeling Way root and branch-how to change shape, how to fool other races, how to govern a Hive without being either too soft on the drones or too tyrannical towards them, how to keep them well fed. And now I'm going to set fire to the pyre and burn my own mother. It seems so wrong-but it's what she wanted. She didn't want a burial-she didn't want to rot away in the dark. When she was clearly dying, she begged me to cremate her after she was clearly dead, so...Mother, I will obey your last wish although I feel as if I'm burning you alive. I know you are dead, you were checked thoroughly by the royal doctors and lay in state for a night and a day, but I still feel like you will feel it.
She wiped a tear from her eye, and said to the drones all around her "Our Queen Anisoptera was what a Hive Queen should be...she was fiercely protective of you all, making sure you were housed, kept save from pony and griffin and rival changeling, and above all, kept fed on as much love as she and her infiltrators could bring in. We are here to say goodbye as she enters the Gate of the Otherworld, which all Changelings must enter sooner or later no matter what shapes they take and how much they are loved. My heart has joined a thousand, for my mother has joined the Hive Invisible". She planted a kiss on her dead mother's forehead just below the horn. A horn that will never glow with magic again. she thought. She placed her horn to the pyre of fragrant Pico-wood, a type of wood popular for funeral pyres because it's smell blocked out the stink of burning flesh, and ignited it with a spark of magic, stepping well back as the green flames shot up to consume the body that had been her mother. Farewell Ani, your last wishes have been respected, I can only hope that you can be happy in the afterlife, and that your soul did not burn up with your body.
All her changelings who were present in her Hive gathered around her and bowed low three times, pressing their noses to the ground as was traditional at the coronation of a new Changeling Queen. One of her generals brought her mother's royal crown, a golden circlet studded with emeralds to her, upon a purple velvet cushion. "Your Majesty, Queen Chrysalis, we hail you as our new Queen. All Hail Queen Chrysalis." And every changeling replied loudly "ALL HAIL QUEEN CHRYSALIS", the sound from all the changeling throats echoing and re-echoing off the cliffs and through the canyons of their lands. She placed the circlet upon her head.
She looked around at them all...many were thin and hungry with withered wings, as despite the best efforts of her mother and her infiltrators there was never quite enough love to properly feed them all, and she had spent a lot of what had been brought in recently on prolonging the life of her dying mother for as long as she could. "Consider the rest of today a holiday. Tomorrow things will go back to normal and I and my generals will meet to consider a plan that will feed you all as if it was Hearth's Warming Eve, for years to come. But for now I wish to be left alone in my royal quarters with a picture of my mother." She re-entered the Hive on foot, and walked to her royal quarters and her bedroom where a portrait of her mother was, and lay down and cried. Mother, what will I do without you? How will I keep this often hungry hive under control? Changeling loyalty to their Queens is legendary, but long term hunger will still create unrest, and I do not want to be the last of my line. Above all, my hive must be fed.
She reached out and hugged the portrait of her mother. So many happy times...she cherished and protected me from when I was a grub, and unlike the lesser changelings in this hive I never knew hunger. Both my stomachs were always kept full. And she taught me everything I would need to be a good Queen in my own right. How to rule yet keep the common touch...how to feed my ever-hungry hive whilst keeping to the Changeling Way, how to be a proper diplomat and keep things all right with the other Hives. Mother, I already miss you so much. Are you already feasting in the afterlife on as much love as both of your stomachs can hold? Or is there no afterlife-did your mind fade away into nothingness when your body died? I know that your soul is not in a loveless hell as you had a good life as a good changeling when alive. Never did you execute, imprison or exile one of our Hive without good reason and they loved you for it. You always allowed them a trial. Mother, I wonder, can I be as good a Queen as you were? Can I ever be as wise and as loved as you were? Can I?
Author's Note
How would Chrysalis feel when her mother died, I wondered?
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Thirty Things you cannot do as a Changeling-Slice Of Life
Queen Chrysalis put the final touches to her latest Royal Proclamation with a quill held by the magic of her horn. Recently the members of her Hive had been acting up a lot in small ways and reluctantly she decided that they needed a little discipline. The proclamation said
1-Changing into the shape of a Changeling Queen in general and into me in particular is technically High Treason. I'm not going to be evil and hand out the maximum penalty if it was just done in jest, but it has to stop. We cannot have everyling pretending to be a Queen, for the sake of the Hive's basic stability.
2-Do not scream "WAKE UP LAZY BONES" over the general hive mind at 7:00AM. In fact, unless there is a dire danger that you cannot deal with yourself, do not use the general hive mind at all, it's an emergency service. Not something for common changeling chit chat. When you say something over the hive mind, everyling can hear it.
3-I know that it is dark in the hive, but our eyes can generally cope with it, and in fact are designed for it. If you need a bit of extra light, spin a glob of glowing silk and use that light for your own purposes. Do not use your changeling skills to create a bright torch and go around shining it in everyling's eyes as that can spark off violent brawls.
4-When you have used the light from that glob of silk, please take it to the latrines. Leaving it on the floor or wall where anyling can get stuck to it and have to clean it from their body is plain bad manners. I got some of it on my wing yesterday so I know first hand how annoying it is to have to remove anotherling's sticky silk from my body.
5-Queen Uranus of the Uranus Hive is coming in a few days on a formal royal visit, which means that I do not want to hear That Joke at all whilst she is here. In fact, I do not want to hear That Joke at all. I have to admit that it was funny the first time I heard it, but it has long since ceased to be funny.
6-Apart from on my birthday and on Hearth Warming Day, there is no such thing as free love, at least for most of you. If you want to eat, you must either go out and infiltrate for it, or work for it. The illegal tapping of the Cocoon Store's love has to stop. Of course there are exceptions for the grubs and pupa, the old and the sick or disabled. But not everyling or we won't be able to feed the grubs. They need that love more then you do.
7-Noling is to change into Pinkie Pie unless ordered to do so by me personally. The reason is that changelings who take on the shape of Pinkie Pie start to act like Pinkie Pie, and she is so random. And wants to have parties so much. I like a good party as much as everyling, but not all the time.
8-Noling unless as part of a formal military drill is to change into a pony, griffin or other creature and have his or her friends yell "Escaped Prisoner" or anything of the kind, and then lead my guards on a merry chase through the hive, keeping them from their proper duties. The next changelings to do this will get a week locked up in the stockade for their pains.
9-Outdoor fireworks are just that-outdoor fireworks, and unless the Hive has been attacked and the foes have breached the walls, are not to be let off indoors. And yes, inside the communal areas of the Hive counts as indoors. I like fireworks, but please be safe with them for everyling's sake.
10- Noling is allowed to sing the following song.
11-If you have girlfriends or indeed wives in the lands outside the Hive, please do not bring them back to the Hive unless you want them to be hung up in a cocoon to be drained of their love. Mind wipe spells use up a lot of my energy that is better spent on other things.
12-Noling is to share pornography ,be it hard-core or not, over the hive mind. It distracts everyling from more useful activities.
13-Noling is to take on the shape of Shining Armour in front of me, I just want to put such thoughts to the back of my mind.
14-Noling is to urinate in the love ration that they have worked for and then give it to a changeling that they don't like. That's disgusting.
15-Noling is to keep a parasprite as a pet. They eat all our solid food, leaving us with nothing but love to live on.
16-When the Royal Banquet for Queen Uranus is ready, noling is to sample a bit for themselves, * just to taste it* Otherwise everyling nearby will join in and there will be no Royal Banquet for Queen Uranus, and she will not be impressed. I know how greedy most of you are.
17-. The proper response to one of my royal orders is not "Why?"
18-Clouds may only be brought into the hive for emergency fire-fighting, not, repeat NOT, for water fights. Too many changelings not involved in said fights are getting soaked.
19-Noling is to place ropes in the holes in a changelings limbs to tie him or her up just for fun. It's not funny.
20-MRE stands for Meals Ready To Eat, not Miasma's Rotting Entrails, Meals Rejected by Everyone, or anything else of that nature.
21-Noling will pretend to be an Ambassador from another Hive or country. Violators of this rule will be permanently exiled from the Hive.
22-Noling will make up jokes about me.
23-Noling is allowed to dump any kind of rubbish in the Hive's central love store.
24-Noling is allowed to go swimming in the Hive's central love store. We need that love to remain unfouled.
25-Noling is allowed to disguise a snooker ball as a parasprite and then throw it.
26-Noling is to use rude words in front of the grubs.
27-If it is not Heath's Warming Eve, then Santa Hooves is not coming to town and noling is to pretend to be him and fly in on a sleigh.
28-Noling is to organize a trade union and go on strike for more love.
29-Impromptu musicals are allowed, but they have to stop blocking the traffic. Some changelings are trying to get to work.
30- Noling is to give any love to beggars, it's their own fault that they are poor.
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The Twelve Days of Hearth's Warming Corespondence
(Classified Transcripts from Canterlot Intelligence, which has managed to infiltrate the private communications of the Changeling Hives, posted illegally on Ponyleaks.)
Hearth's Warming Day, December 25th, 2013 CR
Dear Miasma, I loved the gorgeous gift that you sent me for Hearth's Warming. You know how much I enjoy eating pears, so you sent me a whole tree of them, with a pretty partridge in it as well. How nice of you. You always send me the very finest presents. I hope that you found my gift to you as enjoyable.
Yours Lovingly, Queen Chrysalis.
Boxing Day, December 26th, 2013 CR
Dear Miasma, those two turtle doves that you sent love each other so much, that my subjects can use them as a food source without draining them to the point of sickness or death. Just the sort of present to give to a Hive that has been very short of love recently. The three birds that you have sent are enough, however, as they need to defecate like any living creature.
Yours Lovingly, Queen Chrysalis.
December 27th, 2013 CR
Dear Miasma, perhaps I did not make it clear enough that the birds you had sent me were enough. Today you sent me three Prench hens. My subjects are getting fed up of cleaning their droppings. We need to keep our Hive clean, to avoid any risk of a deadly cordyceps infection. You're a changeling yourself, you know how dangerous the cordyceps fungus can be. I like it that you have sent me so many gifts, but please, no more birds.
Yours sincerely, Queen Chrysalis.
December 28th, 2013 CR
Miasma....I said to you, no more birds, and you sent me four calling birds. The noise they are making is keeping many of my subjects awake, and it's a struggle to keep the Hive clean. I know you love me and want to send me all sorts of gifts, but please, stop it with the birds. The partridge was sweet, and the turtle doves were useful, but the hens are annoying and the calling birds are a menace. No more birds, thank you very much.
Yours sincerely, Queen Chrysalis.
December 29th, 2013 CR
Miasma, I'm pleased that my message about no more birds finally got through to you, but you sent me five gold...rings. Rings, for someling who has hooves. How am I supposed to put them on? I can't put them on my horn, because the metal interferes with my magic. Yes, I know I'm a changeling, so I could take the shape of a griffin or grow fingers to put them on. But the first would at least at first freak out my subjects who would think that a giant griffin had somehow invaded not only the Hive but also the Royal Quarters, and the second would make it hard for me to walk properly. Golden necklaces, bracelets or earrings would have been wonderful, but sending me jewellery that I can't wear in my own form or in pony form must be a joke of yours. A not very funny joke.
Yours sincerely, Queen Chrysalis.
December 30th, 2013 CR
Miasma...I have told you several times, NO MORE BIRDS. And what did you do? You sent me six pregnant geese, that started laying eggs. I got my subjects to eat the eggs. Are you trying to infect my Hive with cordyceps?? I am wondering by now if you still love me or not. If something is wrong, come and talk about it and stop pestering my subjects with unwanted farm animals.
Queen Chrysalis.
New Year's Eve, December the 31st, 2013 CR
Miasma, you have outdone yourself this time. What in the name of the First Changeling made you send seven swans to my Hive? They attacked my subjects and several of said subjects are now in the hospital with cracked carapaces. Said swans were killed and roasted on my orders and used for food, along with all the birds except for my pet partridge and the two love-producing turtle doves. at least those two are useful. No more birds-any more that you send will be eaten by my subjects, who have had quite enough of cleaning up after them.
Queen Chrysalis
New Year's Day, January the 1st, 2014 CR
Why the buck did you send eight maids to my Hive for? I have quite enough of my own subjects to feed. They were politely but firmly sent back to your hive. If you want to send me lots of gifts, I can send you a list of things that I'd actually like. Still, at least you didn't send any more birds.
Queen Chrysalis
January 2nd,2014 CR
OK, this is getting beyond a joke now. You send nine drummers drumming on war drums, at a time when my subjects are already extremely annoyed with yours, and then you wonder why they were attacked on sight? As far as they were concerned, they thought that the safety and the security of my Hive was being threatened and they were defending it. Your request for extradition of my subjects is refused. No more gifts please from you, I have got thoroughly fed up with them. In fact, your girlfriend status is formally revoked and I am closing the border between our respective Hives until further notice.
Queen Chrysalis
January 3rd 2014 CR
Given the tension that now exists between our Hives, one of the worst things you could have possibly done was to send ten pipers piping on war pipes up to the border. They got the beating they deserved and were very lucky that my guards only used the butts of their spears on them instead of the points. My general suggested raiding your Hive and razing it to the ground. I talked him out of it, since we Changelings have enough foes as it is without fighting each other. Stay away from my border.
Queen Chrysalis.
January 4th 2014 CR
Sending eleven of your highest ranking lords to ask for peace between us was a good idea, but instead of waiting for permission to cross the border and showing the guards their diplomatic ID, they started leaping all over the place. That is why one of them was punched in the head, after he leapt over the formally closed border, and that is why they were all refused entry. If they are diplomats they should behave like it. Leaping about is not lordly behaviour at all. You never see my lords behaving like that.
Queen Chrysalis.
Queen Miasma, my queen has ordered me to withdraw with my entire diplomatic staff from your Hive and your diplomats have all been declared persona non grata after an incident where twelve ladies from your Hive were sent dancing up to the border, where they apparently tried to seduce their way in and were arrested as suspected spies. Any more contact between our Hives, my Queen has told me, will leas to war being declared between our two Hives.
Yours sincerely, Ambassador Chucknin.
Author's Note
(CR-Celestia's Reign )
The first night that the sun failed to rise, a lot of ponies failed to turn up for work, bosses included, and no pony was fired because of the strange situation. The start of that long night was not all that bothersome...ponies reset their alarm clocks and got used to it. It was in the height of summer so the start of the cooling was actually a benefit to many ponies who heartily disliked the hot weather. A month went by before the first serious problems started. Even with the strongest earth pony magic, new seedlings were refusing to grow properly. Firelight and magical torchlight was a poor substitute for the light of the sun, and only a few weedy stalks grew. Existing crops that were fully grown or nearly so were unaffected but it became clear to everypony but the strongest supporters of Nightmare Moon that unless the Princess could be persuaded or forced to raise the sun, that there would be no new harvest the next year. And the pleasant summer night grew cool, then cold, then chill.
The changelings who were undercover sent messengers back to their Hives, reporting on the slow unplanned changes in the weather.
The ponies sent polite delegations with petitions to their ruler, assuring her of their loyalty and asking her to raise the sun for the sake of Equestria's crops. When she failed to do so and banned the issue from being brought up in her Court, they grew restive. Some demonstrated in the streets demanding that the sun be returned to them, others tried different tactics, trying to make Nightmare Moon laugh to put her in a good mood so that she might agree to raise the sun, or even to seduce her. Yet they hesitated to attack their ruler. Partly it was because such a thing just was not done; as their kindly Princess Luna she had been a very good ruler to them. Partly, if she could defeat her sister and banish her into the fiery heart of the sun, what might she do to anypony who dared to rebel against her?
In the Badlands, the cold took longer to seep into the Changeling Hives, and when it did the Changelings could grow warm fur to keep warm. Their fungal food did not need light, but it did need warmth, and with their other sources of food cut off, the Changelings had to fully depend on the love from the cocoons of captured ponies and griffins and that which was brought back by their infiltrators. Love rationing was introduced, much to the annoyance of some changelings, and extra webbing was wrapped around cocoons and Changeling eggs to keep them warm. The Queens put aside their differences to hold a conference. Even if they survived, without other races to feed them love, they would start to slowly starve.
After three months of darkness the food was starting to run out and nearly everypony was going hungry. Some ponies, pegusai in particular, fled the country to try and get to the other side of the planet where it was eternal summer, preferring heat waves and the danger of fires to the freezing temperatures in Equestria. Others including most of the Day Guard under Captain Shining Armour finally attempted a coup to force Nightmare Moon to raise the sun, but after many deaths they only managed to drive her out of Canterlot and nopony knew where she had gone to.
It was then that Queen Chrysalis and the other queens decided to take a calculated risk and reveal themselves to the rest of Equestria.
Many questions later, most of the ponies and griffins who remained decided to take up her offer, and whole herds of ponies, zebras. mules and buffalo made the long slow trek to the Badlands or to the up to now top secret locations of the other Changeling Hives where they had one final feast with what survived of their food around a roaring fire, before saying goodbye to each other and letting the Changelings fang and cocoon them and hang them up. Chrysalis promised them "As soon as the sun rises once more, I will set all of you free, I promise. And you may go back to your homes and I will help you get things back to normal as soon as possible. Goodnight, my little ponies and griffins and buffaloes and mules. Sleep until the day breaks and the shadows flee away." The Changelings now had enough love to gorge on, but at a cost; no more could they interact with the other races. No more could they eat anything but love; no more could they swim or enjoy warm weather as the whole of Equestria sank into a new Ice Age.
Happy New Year-Slice of Life
Queen Chrysalis looked around in the Main Hall of her Hive, which was packed with Changelings. Not as packed as the last year, however, the flying circle they made to celebrate the coming of the New Year was somewhat smaller then the year before. Many fine changelings had died during the Battle of Canterlot, speared by guards or flung into walls and other hard objects by the recast shield spell. Others had died from their wounds or starved to death when many of their infiltrators were uncovered and the amount of love that could be funnelled to the Hive had been greatly reduced. But they had survived and were once more starting to thrive. In the other Hives of Equestria, be they open or concealed, and wherever there were large numbers of Changelings in one place they same New Year Dance would be happening all around the world. One dance that bound the scattered Hives together, and was the one non-emergency thing broadcast over the rarely used hive mind. Of course anyling could tune it out, but they rarely did. Surely the next year will be better then this one was Chrysalis thought to herself as the countdown began, and the circle prepared to land.
"Ten...nine...eight...seven...six...five...four...three...two...one....Happy New Year!" The circle touched the ground and danced and sang, expanding and contracting as it did so.
Should old acquaintance be forgot,
For auld lang syne, my dear,
And surely you’ll buy your love cup !
We two have gained warm griffin love,
We two have loved the seaponies
And there’s a hand my trusty friend !
Afterwards the circle broke up with Changelings hugging and kissing each other before they went outside to watch one of the finest firework displays in the Badlands. Chrysalis, like most Changeling Queens, tended to love a firework display at the start of the new year, to "burn the Old Year out" and to see the New Year in. Ponies and Griffins tended to love fireworks too...she knew Canterlot, Ponyville, Manehatten and Gryffindor would all be having large displays of their own too. On this night of nights, at the start of a brand new year, she could put her fears and her worries to one side for a single night at least. The formal ceremony broke up with special love rations being handed out so that no Changeling would have to do without, even those who were undergoing punishment for some reason. Many Changelings liked to stay up and watch the sun rise, and they were allowed to on this night. The Queen herself partied with the best of them; at this time she treated Changeling nobles and ordinary Changelings in the same way. Only after sunrise did she curl up in her great royal bed, with thoughts of some lover to be in her head.
As she fell asleep she thought I will make this new year great for both myself and my Hive.
Author's Note
Sorry for the shortness of this chapter-it could only go so far. And a Happy New Year 2014 to all of my readers.
