Chapters 1: A Super Dooper Problem
1: A Super Dooper Problem
A streak of pink ripped through the trees as Pinkie dashed down the hard dirt road that lead to Sweet Apple Acres. This was a big problem, a super big problem, A super doper double loopper big problem! A.J. would know what do, whenever any of her friends had a big problem, (though she doubted any of them had one this super, and definitely none this loopper) they went to A.J. for advice. She bolted through the gate that was emblazoned with the Apple family logo, making the hanging sign beneath swing wildly in the back draft.
She glanced anxiously left and right. THERE! She dashed to the orange furred pony that was carrying four times her weight in apples to the barn. Apple jack, or A.J. as her friends call her, was a young Earthpony who lived and worked on the Sweet Apple Acres apple farm, she was no stranger to hard work or problem, but Pinkie knew she had never been faced with a problem as humongously huge as this.
“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJ!” Pinky called in a panicked squeal.
A.J. looked up from her load and turned to see pinky bolting toward her.
“Whoa! Slow down there-.” But it was too late.
Pinky smashed into A.J. sending apples flying in all directions! Pinky looked around.
“A.J.? Where did you go!?”
“I’m right here, Gosh darn it!” snapped a voice from below her.
Pinkie looked down to see the prone Apple Jack laying beneath her. Good, she hadn’t been vaporized!
“What in Celestia’s name has you so riled up?” her friend said wriggling out from under the excited pink Earthpony.
“That’s Just it!” Pinky squealed “I Don’t know.”
“Well why don’ you begin at the bingin’ and go on to the end and then stop? That should Explain all this.” A.J. quipped slapping he crumpled hat back onto he head.
So Pinky did.
“I had just arrived at the baker’s convention in Cantelot, so that I would be able to see all the yummy nummy treats that everypony had made! But then I met this Stallion (A.J.’s eye brow razed at this, Pinky had no idea why.) And he was really nice, he’s an apprentice baker, just like me, and I said ‘that’s so cool’ and he agreed, he was all like ‘we should hang out’ and we did! We had a lot of fun talking and being friends, I love making new friends! But then some weird stuff started happening! Every day that I saw him after that my knees got all knocky, knocky, and my stomach was all like Wooo! Wooo! Even my Pinkie Pie heat was all messed up! That’s why I think he was actually a monster in disguise, like a Changeling! He was trying to turn me into a Pinky Pie cupcake!”
A.J. scrunched up her face in thought.
“You say you had fun with this Feller’?
“Yep, we hung out pretty much every day, except for the days we didn’t.”
“And that you got all, whatdoyacallitnow? Nevoucited whenever he was around?”
“yep, yep, yep!”
Apple Jack grinned wide.
“Ah ha, I reckon I found your problem!” the Earthpony said.
“What, what, what!? Is he a Changeling? Do we have to use the Elements on him!?”
A.J. trotted off.
“Nothin’ that drastic, sugar cube, you just hold tight I know what to do.”
But Pinkie couldn’t sit tight; this was the biggest, hugest. Scariest problem she had ever faced! She needed somepony to help her RIGHT NOW! Then she thought, Twilight! She was just as helpful as Apple Jack and really smart, she would know! Pinky turned and dashed to Twilight’s tree house.
Twilight Sparkle was a unicorn from Canterlot, she had been living in Ponyville for several years now though and was good friends with everypony. She was the smartest pony in all of Equestria! She would know what to do RIGHT NOW!
“Ok, I promise not to tell her, COME IN! This will be so much fun!”
Pinky dashed in quickly startling the Purple unicorn so much that she dropped the phone she was holding.
“Twilight!” Pinkie yelped, “You have to help me!”
Twilight picked the phone back up off the floor with her magic and gently placed it back on to the table.
“I had just arrived at the baker’s convention in Cantelot, so that I would be able to see all the yummy nummy-.”
“A.J. explained the situation to me.” Twilight interrupted. She skipped over to the little corner of the room and poured steaming water from a kettle into a mug and levitated the beverage over to Pinky.
“This is an herbal draft I learned from Zecora, it’ll help your nerves.”
Pinky took the brew and drank it all without waiting for it to cool. The effect was instantaneous. Pinkie slumped and her eye lids wavered over her eyes. She fought the urge to sleep, but it was too strong.
Latter Pinkie woke up in twilight’s bed judging by the sun in the sky, pinky calculated that it was still early in the afternoon, that and the clock on Twilight’s wall said 1:23 PM. Pinky ambled down stairs to the library. She hear Twilight’s voice speaking.
“Thanks for coming out on such short notice,” She said.
“Oh! I wouldn’t dream of missing this opportunity for the world, darling!”
Judging by the sound of the mare’s voice, Pinkie guessed correctly that rarity had joined them in Twilight’s little library. She wandered down the rest of the steps until she entered the room where she had been before. There was Twilight, standing with Rarity, who looked like she had brought half of her Boutique with her.
“There’s the lucky mare!” Rarity said.
Rarity was a unicorn like Twilight, but with white fur and an elegantly curled purple mane.
“Lucky?” pinky asked.
“Why yes of course darling!” Rarity said skipping over to Pinky and levitating her dressmaking supplies along with her.
“But why am I so lucky,” she asked again.
“Oh well it’s a rare treat, for this to happen to you so young!”
“Why is being possessed by a Changeling so lucky!?” Pinky asked impatiently.
Rarity looked up in astonishment!
“You mean somepony else hasn’t explained it to you?”
“Explained What!? What are you guy’s hiding from me!?”
Rarity turned to Twilight, “she really doesn’t understand?”
Twilight shook her head.
“WAT IS IT!” Pinky demanded.
Rarity turned, a devilish grin on her face.
“Why, my sweet, sweet, Pinkie Pie! You’re in Love!”
Author's Note
Welp, here we go, my first Fic, hope everypony enjoyed, I'll try to update this regularly so stay tuned for more!
P.S. there's a very obvious Alice in Wonderland reference, you should be able to find it easily, comment if you do!
2: What is Love (Foal Don't Hurt Me)
Pinkie was baffled, confounded and bewildered, but mostly bamboozled.
“What?” Was all she could manage as a response to Rarity’s comment.
“Love, darling, you’re in Love!”
“What does that mean? Is that some sort of spell? Does Twilight know the counter spell?”
Rarity tittered at Pinkie’s apparent confusion and fear (Ferusion?).
“Don’t worry! Love is a wonderful thing, not some nasty curse.” She paused here and glared out the window, as if straining down some unseen foe.
“Some Stallions are though.” She hissed.
Changing moods as quick as a wink she tuned back to Pinkie, who she had just finished measuring.
“Well, I’ll get started on your dress, and see you in a little while,” she said packing up her things.
“Oh Celestia, this is quite exciting!”
She trotted out giddily giggling all the while. Pinkie turned to Twilight.
“What is love?” she asked.
Twilight scrunched up her face in thought.
“That’s… not an easy question,” she said mournfully.
“Have you ever been in love Twilight?”
Twilight nodded solemnly.
“Once or twice I certainly thought I was in love, but I would soon revert back to calling them ‘just friends.’”
They sat in silence for a little while until Twilight spoke up.
“Love is, a feeling you get, kind of like really good friendship, it’s part of evolution, to help us reproduce.”
Pinkie thought, she loved to make friends, but she wasn’t quite sure this was the same feeling that she got when she made a friend.
“Sorry, I’m not that well versed on the subject. Why don’t you ask Rarity? I’m sure she’s had quite a few Coltfriends.”
Following this advice, Pinkie trotted off to Carousel Boutique.
Inside, Rarity was busy stitching together a flowing blue gown. She turned as Pinky entered.
“Ah, Pinky! Come to see how your dress is coming along?”
“Why are you making me a dress?”
“Why, for when-.” But Rarity stopped herself midsentence covering her mouth with her hoof. Pinkie oblivious strange action to this asked her question.
“What is love?”
“Oh dear, was Twilight unable to explain?”
Pinky nodded in frustrated affirmation.
“Well, When Two ponies fall in love, they complete each other.”
“Complete each other?”
“Yes, love, when you find just the right Stallion, you know because he will complete you! He will be able to fix all the problems you can’t fix yourself, and then you can live together in happiness!”
Rarity got a dreamy look in her eyes when she said that, as if she was imagining her gallant prince to come sweep her off her feet.
“But be warned!” She said, her face darkening. Pinkie scooted back a few steps, startled.
“While some stallions may seem like gentlecolts, they are really heartless brutes!”
Pinkie could see that Rarity had yet to get over the Blue Blood incident from the Gala a few months ago.
She didn’t really feel like she was ‘incomplete’ as Rarity had put it. She just felt… how did she feel? Ever since the Baker’s convention, she hadn’t stopped thinking about the stallion she had met (although whether this was from ‘Love’ or from the fear of him being a monster she was unsure). She wanted to spend time with him, to play and sing and laugh together!
Maybe she was in love.
Author's Note
This one is a little bit shorter then the last chapter.
3: The Next to Last Straw
Pinkie wandered her way around town trying to figure out what was going on inside her screw-bally head! She had had a superific fun time at the convention she was sure of that. But she still didn’t really understand what this “Love” that everypony, except her, apparently knew all about yet was unable to explain! She looked up at the ponies wandering around the town square. Each face was familiar, all of them she though knew well, but with her new knowledge, she wondered if she really did. This Love thing sounded really fun, a special friend, someone who is just for you? She didn’t understand why nopony had told her about it before. She felt a little more than angry at being left out.
But all thoughts of turning everypony into cupcakes dissolved when she saw A.J. come ambling down the street.
That was it! She could ask A.J. she didn’t know why she hadn’t thought of that before! She zipped over next to the farm pony.
“Hey there A.J.”
Apple Jack’s eyes opened wide in shock when she saw Pinkie cross he path. She tried to weave around her. But Pinkie dashed to the side to block her retreat.
“I need to ask you something!”
“And I’d be happy to answer later, sugar cube, but I have to get to the train station-.”
“But I don’t know what love is and Twilight and Rarity say I have it but not to worry because it’s not a cure, so Twilight doesn’t know the counter spell to a curse that doesn’t exist, which I think she should, you never know if the curse is just PRETENDING that it doesn’t exist so that you wake up one day and POOF you’re cursed! But Rarity says that love is someone who completes you and that gentlecoalts are actually brutes but that doesn’t make since because those are opposites (I looked it up) and how can a Stallion be both? But this all come back to I don’t know if I’m in Love yet!”
Pinkie finished and took a big breath.
A.J.’s face contorted with frustration.
“Consarnit! How come every time you have a one word problem, you can somehow expand it to a paragraph?”
Pinkie shrugged, skill she guessed.
A.J. huffed, and continued walking.
“When ya’ fall in love you get married, that’s ma’ two bits, now I have to go!”
She pushed past Pinkie and galloped toward the station.
Married?
Like Mr. and Mrs. Cake?
THAT’S IT.
She spun in place; she couldn’t believe she hadn’t thought of it before! They would be perfect! She couldn’t believe what a frosting head she was! The Cakes had taken he on as their apprentice when she first came to ponyville they had let her live above their bakery and taught her everything she knew about baking and making treats, she was sure they would be able to explain to her what Love is!
She galloped to Sugar Cube Corner, the shop where she both lived and worked. It was mid-day, so the Cakes should be tending shop. The swing doors whipped wildly back and forth as she bolted through. But to Pinkie’s dismay the cakes were nowhere to be seen. The only pony standing in the small bakery was a blue rainbow maned pegasus.
“Oh, hey Pinkie,” Rainbow Dash said.
“Good thing you’re here! We need-.”
But Pinkie didn’t give her friend time to finish her statement. She slammed the racer pony to the floor and spoke in an excited squeaking voice:
“I don’t know what love is and Twilight and Rarity say I have it but not to worry because it’s not a cure, so Twilight-.”
“Celestia’s giant glowing dung! Are you still on about that?!”
Pinkie was shocked that her friend was aware of her predicament. Rainbow dash took this breaking concentration to slip out from the young pony’s pinning hold.
“How do you-.”
“It’s called a phone Pinkie,” Rainbow Dash quipped “You really should stay up to date on technology.”
Pinkie shook herself vigorously to focus her attention back on Rainbow Dash. Rainbow Dash was the town weather pony, in charge of maintaining a proper weather pattern and keeping the seasonal changes in order. Although the brash pegasus would rather spend all day dashing (Pinkie giggled at her unintentional pun) around the sky racing imaginary rivals (and always wining). Perhaps she was not her first choice for advice, but the pegisus always felt emotions with the whole of her body, if she had ever experience love, she should be able to explain it to her.
Pinkie opened her mouth to ask Rainbow dash her question, which was starting to become an automatic action, but the pegisus was already noncalontly walking out the door.
“I’ll catch ya’ latter a’right?”
“But Rainbow Dash!”
“I’m not getting caught up in your sappy little quest for the meaning of Love!” she snapped and took off out of the door soaring up into the sky. But pinkie took off after the weather pony, Rainbow Dash being the fastest flyer in equestrian had never stopped her from chasseing her down before!
Pinkie looked to the left and the right, then up at rainbow dash. Judging by her trajectory, speed of flight and angle of decent she was head just outside of town. Pinkie reached down and popped a peace of turf out of the ground. She had a secret system of tunnels that lead all over ponyville and the surrounding area, she had discovered the tunnels about a year ago, apparently nopony else knew they existed. By using the tunnels she could reach any point in ponyville even before Rainbow Dash!
She dove into the dark cavern and closed the sod that served as a door.
Two seconds later she was at the edge of town by the Everfree forest. Rainbow Dash dove down and skidded to a halt in front of the pink pony.
“How did you!?”
Pinky pinned Rainbow dash to the ground by one of her wings, and glared menacingly into her eyes.
“What is Love,” she hissed, emphasizing each word. The Weather pony let out a squeak of fright.
“Um, is everything alright?” a small voice asked.
The two mares turned to see a small pegisus pony, with a pale yello coat and a flowing pink mane.
Fluttershy was in charge of taking care of the animals around town. She was soft spoken and rarely got involved in arguments, but when she got angry, OH CELESTIA, she got angry.
Pinkie released her captive friend and turned to the new arrival.
“Do you know what Love is Fluttershy?
“um, I’m not sure I’m the best pony to talk about that, Rarity might-.”
“But I’m not asking Rarity, I’m asking you!”
“I-I don’t know, I’m sure Twilight would-.”
“But what is YOUR answer?
“I-I don’t-.”
“ANSWER THE QUESTION!”
She had had enough! Everypony knew what this Love thing was but refused to tell her for so long! She would have an answer! In her rage, Pinkie failed to see the two figures being lead by rainbow dash up the hill.
Author's Note
Almost finished with his one, feels like a long time since I started it.
The Cakes slowly walked up to Pinkie.
“There you are!” Mrs. Cake said cheerfully when they reached the top of the hill.
Pinkie turned to see the two approaching bakers. Fluttershy flew away in fear. Mrs. Cake was dumpy and squat, like a dumpling, where as her husband was the exact opposite, tall and lanky like a stick bug.
“What’s all this Rainbow dash has been telling us about you going colt crazy?” Mr. Cake asked glaring down at her as if he had just caught her trying to sneak and extra slice of cake.
“I’m not colt crazy, I’m in love, well at least that’s what everyone has been saying, but I still don’t really know what that means! Twilight said it’s a bio-whatchamacallit, Rarity says it’s someone who completes you, whatever that means, and Apple Jack said it was getting married, but I still don’t understand!”
Mrs. Cake sighed.
“We knew this day would come, we thought we could keep you as the sweet little filly who walked in our shop lonely and hungry forever.”
“Why would you want me to be lonely and hungry?” Pinkie asked shocked.
“That’s not what I meant sweetie.”
“The point is,” Mr. Cake interrupted, “Is that it is mostly our fault that you are so confused right now, we didn’t want you to grow up, so we didn’t talk to you about grown up things like Love.”
“Can we talk about it now?” Pinkie asked.
“That’s what we’re here for,” Mrs. Cake said sitting down next to the filly. Mr. Cake did the same on Pinkie’s other side.
“So, what do you want to ask us? In one sentence,” Mr. Cake said interrupting pinkie as she opened her mouth.
Pinkie thought and tried to condense all of her questions into one sentence.
“What happens when you fall in love?”
Mrs. Cake thought, rubbing her hooves together.
“Well, whenever the fella’s around, you get all excited and nervous.”
Check, she got nervous just thinking about him.
“Also, you spend a lot of time thinking about him.”
Double check, she had spent the entire day, practically, thinking about her friend.
“And you will want to do nothing but spend the entire day with him.”
TRRIPPLE CHECK! This was looking good!
“What happens then?” she asked excitedly.
“Well,” Mr. Cake said, “You go on dates I guess, although we didn’t date much before we got married.” He said scratching his chin. “But then again we were able to spend a lot of time together anyway, because we both worked at the old bakery.”
Quadruple loople check! Pinkie knew that they had definitely spent a whole lot of time together at the convention. That must count as at least seventy hundred bazillion dates!
“Then he asks you to be his fillyfriend-.”
“A SPECIAL FRIEND!?” Pinkie sat up excited, interrupting Mr. Cake.
He looked to the sky, thoughtfully.
“I suppose you could call it that,” He said.
This was getting better and better!
She sat down and let them continue.
“After a while,” Mr. Cake said sagely, “I suppose if he’s the one who you are destined for, you would get married, have children, and live together forever.”
Pinkie couldn’t believe her ears! This was the most supper amazing wonderfulrific thing she had ever heard of.
“It’s not all lollipops and gumdrops though,” Mrs. Cake said, breaking Pinkie’s train of thought. You’re only a pony, you will get angry at each other, you will fight and get on each other's nerves. But if you truly love someone, you will be able to put aside trivial matters and remind yourself why it is you love this pony.”
Pinkie pulled out the note book she had been writing in, that didn’t line up with her notes! She From Mr. to Mrs. Cake in confusion.
“What!?”
“Don’t worry, if you work hard, the good times will greatly outweigh the bad.”
Pinkie sat quiet for a moment, letting all she had learned sink in. A wonderful special friend, just for her, someone who she spent all her time with.
She smiled wide, it sounded fun!
“PINKIE!” the excited voice of Rarity echoed up the hill as she dashed up Twilight in tow. She seemed to be carrying a graceful blue dress, made of a light fabric that flapped about wildly as she charged up the hill.
She skidded to a halt in front of the family, panting with exhaustion.
“He *gasp* A.J.*pant* train*wheeze* more time.”
“Wait, what’s going on?”
Without explaining Rarity popped the dress over pinkie’s head.
“No time to explain, darling. Oh dear, I should do something with that bird’s nest on your head.”
She pulled a comb and spray bottle, seemingly out of nowhere and went to work attempting to tame the wild mass of hair that served as Pinkie’s mane. Pulling out tangles that popped right back into place.
She sighed, admitting defeat.
“I suppose that’ll have to do,” she muttered dispiritedly.
Now it was Twilight’s turn, she did what Rarity had failed to accomplish using magic to not only tame that mass of pink hair, but shape it into a quite pleasing top knot. Next, Fluttershy returned with a Dragon Lily from the flowers outside her house for Pinkie to put in her hair. Rainbow Dash, came armed with a set of costume armor, that she said would look great with everything else, put the rest of the group voted her down.
“What in equestrian is all this for?”
“You’ll-,” Rarity started but quickly fell into a burst of excited giggles that kept her from speaking.
“Let’s head to the train station,” Twilight said “A.J.’s bringing in an important shipment from Canterlot.”
Pinkie didn’t understand what was so important that they had to get her all dressed up for, more so then the Grand Galloping Gala. *gasp*! Was A.J. bringing the GGG from Canterlot?! But if so why weren’t her friends dressed up?
Her pinkie sense told her to trust her friends so she followed the group down the quiet streets now lit with the sleepy light of evening. The arrived at the train station Rarity looked up and down the tracks to see if the train was coming.
“There!” Rainbow dash called from her vantage point in the air “I see it!”
And indeed in a few minutes the train came chugging down the tracks.
“PONYVILLE! LAST STOP! EVERYPONY OFF!” The conductor called from the engine.
At this point Rarity looked ready to explode with excited laughter. But Twilight helped her to calm down.
“Pinkie! It really is you!” The stallion gasped galloping over to the shaking pink pony.
He was just as she remembered him. Dark brown coat and mane the color of melted chocolate, but with bright eyes that looked like green diamonds set into a cake. His cutie mark showed a rubber spatula and mixing bowl.
The two stood in silence for a while, just looking at each other, making sure they were rally there. But swift kick from A.J. got the filly crazy stallion going.
“Y-you look beautiful,” he said stiffening and looking everywhere but his charge.
Another kick from the farm pony.
“P-Pinkie, I-I wanted you to know, the days at the convention that we spent together were some of the best days in my life.”
Pinkie felt heat rush too her cheeks, she had never blushed like this before, not even when she told that one bad joke that nopony got.
“A-And I didn’t want it to end, so I decided to move my bakery here, I wasn’t having much luck in Fillydelphia anyway. And I wanted to know…”
Pinkie tensed, this was it!
“Will… Will you be… my fillyfriend?”
Pinkie covered her mouth with both hooves; she felt something wet drip onto one of them. She was crying, but she wasn’t sad?
Unable to muster any words Pinkie simply nodded and was immediately embraced by the stallion.
After a very long hug A.J. approached them.
“You have no idea what a problem your beau was to find, took me next to all day. Wouldn’t stop talking about you on the train!”
She took a deep breath.
“I reckon I should give you my advice on love now, it’s not much, but I remember a wise old pony once told me this,” and she began:
“‘Love is patient; Love is kind; Love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing but rejoices in the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, and endures all things.’”
Pinkie looked up at her friend, no, her clotfriend, her special somepony just for her. He looked down back at her smiling.
“Do you promise to stay?” Pinkie asked.
“I do.”
And he did.
Author's Note
That's all for this story, tell me what you thought and what I can do better.
