Cheerilee is getting old.

After suffering a midlife crisis at the tender age of thirty, the burnt-out schoolteacher uproots her life in Ponyville and moves to the nation's capital, where she encounters gangs of cross-dressing hooligans, bizarre sexual practices, and a culture marred by decadent consumerism, social injustice and rampant stupidity.

Canterlot needs a rebel to set it straight, and Cheerilee needs something to do. But can the jaded thirty-something stay committed to the good fight? Or will she relinquish her rebellious ways and finally learn what it means to age gracefully?

Special thanks to Fife and Pie for proofreading.