Military Ponies

by The Keeper Of Tales

Rating: everyone
Tags: Random, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Main 6, Comedy, Adventure
Length: 1144

Captain Led Mouth is the toughest of the tough when it comes to proper pony military training. What does he have instore for his platoon next??

Captain Led Mouth is the toughest of the tough when it comes to proper pony military training. What does he have instore for his platoon next?? And how will the main 6 get caught up in all this????????

Published 2013-11-23 17:40:02 UTC
Last updated 2013-11-23 17:40:02 UTC

WELCOME TO HELL, MAGGOTS!!!

It was just another day at base camp Equestria, the most prestigious and elite of pony military base camps in all the land.

The sun beamed down on the training camp below. Rays of light hit the ponies as they continued their laps around the course. Beads of sweat dropping down there faces, and running down there back. The shouts and screams of drill constructers can be heard from all directions, barking commands and orders like no tomorrow. “YOU MAGGOTS BETTER BE KIDDING ME RIGHT NOW!!!!” Captain Led Mouth yelled at his platoon. For you see, Captain Led Mouth was known for being the toughest of the tough, the manliest of the manliest in all of base camp Equestria. If you, or anypony else was designated to enter that platoon, you better get ready for a hell lot of training, working, and fighting.

Led Mouth and his platoon sat at attention in the heart of the training camp, all the ponies standing stiff as a plank, all the while Led Mouth continued his violent screaming. “YOU PONIES MAKE ME SICK”, Led Mouth snorted a large wad of mucus in his mouth, and spit it directly into one of his private’s faces. “WHAT ARE YOU? A BUNCH OF LOW LIFE FILLIES??!?!?!?!” his face grew red now with anger towards his men. Led Mouth then fished threw his saddle bag, and whipped out a magazine, the latest issue of Play Mare. “WHAT IS THIS IN MY HOOF??” the captain shouted at the ponies, they all stayed silent. “THIS IS A PORNAGRAPHIC NOVEL, AND I DO NOT EXEPT ANY SORT OF PORNAGRAPHIC PROPERTY IN MY PLATOON! NOW WHO IN THE NAME OF CELESTIA OWNS THIS THING????”

One private stepped forward, his face filled with fear. “I-its m-mine s-sir” the private said, his voice muffled and shy. Led Foot approached the small pony, looking down on him like a bear mocking it’s spray. “YOU WILL HAUL YOUR LITTLE FLANK ALL THE WAY UP MOUNT LUNA AND BACK, WHITH ABSOLUTLY NO BREAKS WHAT SO EVER!!!! IF YOU ARE NOT BACK IN A GOOD HALF HOUR, YOU CAN KISS YOUR SORRY FLANK GOOD BYE!” the pony nodded, and began his march to hill Luna, alone.

Led Foot then turned his attention towards the rest of the platoon, able to calm himself down. “Now, I have an important meeting to attend to with high command, I want you all to make your way to the firing range, and begin the daily routine. GO GO GO!!!” within moments the platoon was gone, off to follow their orders. Led Mouth made his way in the opposite direction towards the command tents.

On his way to the tents, Led Mouth had to pass the vehicle section of the camp. Here all the Humvees, tanks and choppers were kept, prepped and ready for action whenever necessary. This area of the base camp happens to be barren of any ponies at the time. Most ponies were either at the obstacle course, firing range, or mess hall at this time of day.

Just as Led Mouth was about to continue on to his destination, he spotted one pony, who looked to be an engineer of some sorts. He was positioned on top of a Humvee, and looked to fixing one of the radio antennas, but his face was out of view. The captain grew curios as to what the engineer was doing exactly, “Soldier”, he shouted. “Mind telling me why you are the only pony here. Where is the rest of your platoon”? The engineer pony simply ignored the captain’s orders, and continued with his work .

This ticked off Led Mouth , he was not used to a pony ignoring his orders. “SOLDIER THAT IS AN ORDER, I DEMAND YOU STEP DOWN HERE THIS INSTANT!!” Led Mouth now had the engineer’s attention. The engineer slowly raised his head, and when revealing her actual face, Led Foot realized it had been a terrible idea to yell at one of the main 6 them self’s.

It was none other then Apple Jack herself. She stood atop the Humvee, looking down on the captain with a stare that could burn threw his skull . Apple Jack hopped off the vehicle, and started to approach the now terrified Led Mouth, she still held he same look of annoyance and rage. Apple Jack's nose was now touching Led Mouth's, the odor of oil came off her body and entered his nostrils, causing him to cringe. She finally spoke, "'Who in the right min' of Celestia do ya think ya are"? Led Mouth was now cowering, regretting the thought of ever yelling at one of the elements themselves, which can get your sorry flank kicked out of the military in a heart beat. Led Mouth then shot back up, realizing how disappointing he was making himself look. He then raised one hoof in a solute position, and said "I apologize ma'am, I had mistaken you for somepony else". This was the only excuse Led Mouth could have thought of at the time

Apple Jack rolled her eyes, and took a step back, "You sure are lucky I'm too busy to report ya to high command for rais'in your tone with me. Your also lucky I ain't no tattletale neither. Now get out of my sight". Led Mouth lowered his hoof, and marched off. When far away from Apple Jack, the captain slapped his face with his hoof, still disappointed in himself for his actions. But at that very moment, the shots off sniper fire echoed threw out the camp.

Led Mouth knew this was wrong, all ponies knew that firing a high power fire arm like a sniper this close to the command tents was braking all rules of conduct. Led Mouth knew that his meeting could wait, this rogue pony needed to be taught a lesson, before anypony got hurt .

Led Mouth followed the sound of gun fire, until he found himself at the top of mount Luna. After a few moments of scoping out the tree line, a single pony could be seen, crouched beneath a some shrubs, wearing a ghillie suit and open firing at what looks to be home made targets at the bottom of the hill. Led Mouth began to march towards the unknown pony, getting ready to unleash his anger, he stopped himself in his tracks when he noticed that the ghillied ponies mane was a bright pink.

Author's Note

I hope you guys like this one. Now just to make things clear, I don't have any actual military experience what so ever, so if I do happen to get any facts wrong, please tell me :)

BTW: I want your feed back! Any typos I can fix, anything that could have been better? Please tell me. :)