The suit was not something Discord particularly enjoyed, but it wasn’t his least favorite outfit either. It existed in a warm medium, something that he would only wear on the occasion where it was absolutely needed of him, such as now.
It was a different outfit than most of the outfits he owned; he owned many different costumes, from a cowboy outfit to a maid costume to royal guard ensemble from two-thousand years ago. These outfits all existed as articles that he could simple conjure into existence, and have on his body whenever he wanted.
His suit was different.
His suit, was in fact, a set of tangible articles of clothing. It has odd pants legs that fitted his two odd legs, and strange holes in the back for his two strange wings. It had a ruff and a bow tie— the whole works.
Discord adjusted his bow tie, and ran a talon over the wall next to him. As he did so, the surface turned from perfectly maintained flagstone to a shiny, silvery surface which reflected the chaos spirit’s image perfectly.
“Oh my, I am a handsome devil,” he said to himself, waggling his eyebrows. He puckered up, turning slightly from side to side, checking himself out in the mirrored surface, when a figure entered the room.
“That’s odd, I can hardly breathe in here,” came the voice of Equestria’s leader, Princess Celestia. “It’s as though someone’s ego was filling up all the free space in the room.”
“Oh please, Celly,” Discord said, snapping his lion’s paw and watching the mirror piece disappear as a result. “Surely you can spare me some of that wonderful cordialness and love you use with your little ponies?”
“They haven’t been a constant antagonizing agent towards me,” Celestia said. “Unlike a certain manifestation of chaos.”
“That’s the key though, isn’t it?” Discord said, smiling as he curved himself around loosely. “Chaos isn’t meant to make your life easier, after all...”
“Well then, you shouldn’t sound so surprised when certain ponies don’t particularly enjoy you,” Celestia said, glancing at Discord with a short of lopsided look. “Anyway, I was only here to speak to you about something I’d like to return to you.”
“Well, let’s back up for a moment,” Discord said, raising up his talon and paw. “You surely can’t have forgotten...”
“I don’t think I ever could,” the princess said with a roll of her eyes, but her tone hinted a sort of nostalgic sorrow that Discord grinned at.
“You certainly didn’t when I was with the yellow one right after my reformation,” he went on to say. Discord took his paw and began to mold his face as though it were clay. Celestia stared on in terrified fascination, before Discord released his face; it was now an overly cute version of his former face, with large eyes, long eyelashes, and an innocent look plastered to it that look as out of place as rat in a cat’s nest.
“‘Oh, he can be such a sweetheart,’” he said in a tone that quite obviously mocked Celestia’s. Celestia scowled at this, and Discord shook his face clean.
“I didn’t say that, I merely agreed with Fluttershy’s sentiments that you can be a sweetheart.” Not a second later, she realized what she had just said, and blushed furiously. Discord cackled joyously.
“Oh, my dear Princess, you are the height of comedy,” Discord crooned, wrapping himself around the alicorn. “Simply giving me the best laughs.”
Celestia’s blush had faded, and her scowl returned. “Discord, I don’t have time for this. We are supposed to be at the ball very shortly; it’s going to be your first appearance in public since your reformation and that business in Ponyville after Princess Twilight Sparkle summoned you.”
“Well, that’s not entirely true,” Discord said, grinning maliciously. “Remember when I went out bowling?”
Princess Celestia glared at him. “I don’t think those ponies you went bowling with will ever forget it.”
“Hey, one might argue having the experience of being a bowling pin would be quite the story to tell to your grandfoals,” Discord pointed out, while Celestia ground her teeth in frustration.
“Fine, this will be your first appearance in public in which you do not harass or terrorize my citizens in some way!” Celestia was nearly shouting at this point.
“Oh Tia, you simply are no fun at all!” Discord cackled madly. “You must learn to lighten up.”
“The sanity of my subjects is no laughing matter!” Celestia yelled. Discord gave her an inane grin.
“Oh, I just love watching your blood boil, you know that?” He slid across the room, as though the floor were made of ice, over to the window, to which he turned his back. “It’s so fun!”
“If you were a bit less of a complete terrorization, maybe other beings could stand to be around you,” Celestia hissed. Discord raised an eyebrow.
“Ooh, those words cut so deep,” he mocked. “Ponies love me, Celestia; they just don’t know it yet.”
“Even back in the days after you betrayed us, your followers never were on your side,” Celestia whispered under her breath. Discord’s expression of intrigue stayed present on his face.
“I beg your pardon?” he asked, voice full of equal parts confusion and annoyance. Celestia smiled, albeit a cruel smile, at getting under Discord’s skin for a change.
“Why do you think we found you so easily?” Celestia continued, her voice still hushed.
“It’s not as if I was exactly hiding myself away,” Discord said, trying to pass off as unperturbed, but his voice wavered as he spoke. “I was sitting in the middle of a wonderfully transformed chaos-themed wonderland!”
“I wasn’t talking about when we found you.” Celestia’s smile grew bigger, and she looked up at Discord. Discord felt something that might have been a twinge of fear as he looked into those eyes, which clearly had a deep hatred locked inside them.
Discord let his mind run through his memories, and he blanched. Coughing loudly, he went on to say, “Well, who needs followers? Just more responsibility to look after. Nothing that I would want to deal with.”
“Of course,” Celestia said, somewhat calmer, although the same hate still blazing in her eyes. “Why do you think any of this happened?”
“I have no idea what you are implying,” Discord said, sweating slightly.
“You know damn well,” Celestia barked at him, her anger flaring up again. Discord swallowed hard, more sweat gathering on his misshapen brow. Celestia’s horn glowed with her brilliant magic, and a small black seed was levitated in front of Discord, who plucked it from the air with his talon.
“Ah, one of my old pals,” he said, staring down at the seed. “And you said I was friendless.”
“It’s a plant, Discord.”
Discord pretended to look offended. “Are you implying plants cannot be our friends? Perish the thought, Celestia!”
Celestia rolled her eyes, but otherwise ignored his commentary. “You must remember this particular kind of seed.”
“But of course.” It was Discord’s turn to roll his eyes. “Your little prodigy and her swarm of annoying friends, along with the yellow one, just dealt with the vines that sprouted up and kidnapped you and your sister.”
“This one is different, Discord,” Celestia told the manifestation of chaos. Discord opened one eye and allowed it to examine the seed that was held in his talon. It was not black with a slight brown pattern wrapping around it. It was a dark green, not quite black, and it was white instead of brown.
“Ah,” he said quietly.
“Yes,” Celestia said, somewhat smugly. “Uncorrupted.”
“Well, what’s the point of bringing this up now?” Discord asked, giving the seed a sideways glance. “We’re about to go to a lovely ball, there’s no use in uprooting ancient history.”
“Let’s forget the ball for a moment,” Celestia said. “I’ve got some things I’m ready to lift from my back; but first, I need you to remember the exact circumstance in which one of these seeds was used for us last.”
Discord paled. “Well, like I said, no use in dredging up ancient history right now, we’ve got—”
“Discord!” Celestia shouted, the room shaking slightly. Discord’s ears wilted.
“It’s no use anyway,” Discord said. “All of our memories depend on a faulty camera in my mind.”
“Show me,” Celestia spat fiercely at Discord. “Show me you remember!”
Discord sighed. “Fine. It’s going to be a ride, though.” As he said this, he moved his talon around his lion’s paw, and in an instant he was holding an elegant bottle of wine. “I’m sure you’ll want a drink.”
“Stop stalling,” Celestia told him. “And play it now.”
Discord shrugged. “Suit yourself.” Taking a deep swig from the bottle with his lion’s paw grasping it, he used his talon to take hold of his right eye and began to twist it. As he did so, his eye began to extend to telescopic proportions. He relinquished his hold on the bottle, which nevertheless stood in the air, floating obediently for its summoner, and tapped the back of his head. The sound of a movie projector starting up could be heard, and a flickering light came from Discord’s eyes. He closed his unaffected eye, which allowed the light to focus on coming from his extended eye, and on the far side of the wall, just like a movie, a memory from a god of chaos began to play.
“Tia, look at what I’ve found!” A young Discord said excitedly, sliding around in the grass like some sort of hyperactive snake. A young Princess Celestia, her mane a light cotton-candy pink, turned to look at the source of the voice.
“What is it, Discord?” she asked pleasantly. Young Discord smiled, and presented a small pile of small green seeds with a snaking white pattern covering them resting on his paw.
“They’re a strange type of seed I discovered growing near your palace in the Everfree!”
Young Celestia looked at them. “Have you taken them to the royal botanist to see what they are?”
“I don’t need any stupid botanist to tell me what these are,” Young Discord scoffed. “I know what these seeds can do, even if I don’t know the name or the family or the class or the genus.”
“What can they do, then?” Young Celestia asked. Young Discord gave her a knowing grin, and plucked one of them from the pile using his talon.
“They can become anything I want them to be,” he said, his voice full of mystery. “Any plant, that is.”
Young Celestia rolled her eyes. “Of course they can, your powers can do any of that stuff. That’s not so amazing.”
“Aha,” Young Discord said. “But this is real.” Taking the one seed he had in his talon, he threw it at the ground. It fell into a little curvature in the soil, and the two stared at it for a few long moments, waiting for something to happen. After roughly three minutes, Young Celestia was about to turn away, when there was a small rumbling noise, accompanied by a few weak tremors. A flower with a brilliant green stem and an amazingly red blossom shot from the ground. The stem was covered in thorns, but the flower itself was so beautiful that Young Celestia couldn’t tear her eyes away from it.
“It’s wonderful,” she said in a hushed whisper. Young Discord smiled, attempting to act smug, but he was blushing under his soft brown fur. He bent over and plucked it from the ground, his talon protecting him from the thorns that would have dug into his lion’s paw.
“Here, take it,” he said, handing it to Young Celestia, who blushed as she accepted it.
“I named it a ‘rose’ because it arose from the ground,” Young Discord explained. “They come in other colors as well, from pink and yellow to blue and black, but red seems to be the favored color.”
“You say it rose from the ground, like it just did,” Young Celestia said, giving Young Discord a look. “But don’t all the plants do that?”
“Yes, but this is what it defaults to when I don’t ask it to be something else,” Young Discord told Young Celestia. “And before you say it’s just my powers, try it for yourself.”
“How do I know that you won’t just change it into something different than a rose while I’m standing right next to you?” Young Celestia asked suspiciously.
“Well, I don’t know what you’re thinking of,” Young Discord reasoned. “I can’t read minds. Yet.”
Young Celestia gave the chaos spirit an incredulous look, but levitated a seed from his pile and threw it to the ground. It fell next to a small anthill, where the ants who were advancing to the hive gave it a wide birth. Again, not three minutes later and it sprouted, but instead of a rose, it was an orange tree sapling.
“Wow...” Young Celestia said, gaping at it. Discord’s smile grew bigger, and the blush remained all the same.
Discord’s head made a sputtering mechanical noise, and the memory film stopped. He opened his other eye, and pressed his extended one shut, turning to Celestia. “Are you happy?”
Celestia shook her head. “Show me the other one.”
“What is even the point of this?” Discord asked loudly, throwing his paw and talon towards the ceiling. “Reliving the past does nothing for either of us!”
Celestia didn’t even blink. “Play the other memory.”
Discord rolled his eyes. “What was the point in reforming me if you hate me so, Tia?”
“Play the other memory,” Celestia said, expression stalwart. Discord sighed, re-extended his eye, and hit the back of his head. The movie projector noise filled the room, and another memory began to play in the same place as the memory from before.
“Discord!” came a voice from behind the still young, but somewhat older than the last memory Discord. He turned around, a manic look gracing his bizarre features.
“Oh, lovely!” he said in a jovial tune. “Tia, you’re just the mare I wanted to see!”
“What are you doing, Discord?” the somewhat-older-than-last Celestia asked, her voice the voice of one pleading with a power greater than themselves. “You need to stop what you’re doing, please...”
“Stop what?” Young Discord asked. “Stop my fun? My glorious plans for a better future?”
“It’s none of that,” Young Celestia said, her teeth grit. “You’re a terror, you truly are! What you did to Luna—”
“Luna wasn’t up for the game,” Young Discord said with a shrug. “Those who don’t play by the rules of the game don’t get to play, Celestia. Although...” He grinned maliciously. “My rules do change quite often...”
“You’re a monster,” Young Celestia spat at Young Discord. Young Discord smirked at her.
“Why, you speak as though that is a bad thing!” The chaos god fluttered into the air, turning a loop-de-loop in the air. Young Celestia scowled at him.
“Now come on, Tia,” he said, landing back on his claw and hoof. “Let’s do this together; we’ve been drifting too far apart as of late, I want something reignite the flame.”
Young Celestia stared at the creature before him as though he had just turned inside out. “Excuse me? You’re running wild, wreaking havoc, and you want to... reignite the flame of something that went out a long time ago?”
“Oh, don’t act like it went out,” Young Discord said. “We’re still together, you and I. There was never an official notice of our severing.”
“Well, not anymore!” the princess bellowed. Young Discord raised an eyebrow. “I’m through with you! You want an official notice? Consider this one!” Young Celestia hacked from the back of her throat, and spat in Young Discord’s face. Young Discord’s eyes widened in surprise as the mare walked away from him.
“Leave then!” he shouted. “I don’t need you for the chemicals of our romance! I’ve had them with me all along! I can be my own agent! My own bond, my own...” Young Discord stopped speaking when he realized that he was just spouting random chemistry nonsense to the wind. His eye twitched as he stared after where Young Celestia had gone.
“Well then,” Young Discord said, reaching into an impossible pocket somewhere on his body. “I’ll just have to start planning ahead.”
Looking down into his hands, he watched the green seeds with the snaking white pattern all about them. He furrowed his brow, and they glowed a translucent black color. Their green changed to black, and their white changed to a brown. He cackled quietly and completely inanely to himself as he pocketed the seeds away.
The machine in his mind spluttered to a stop again. Discord looked over at Princess Celestia, who was giving him a stern look. It was also a look that held another side to it, but Discord couldn’t fully see it.
“I’m impressed that you got those two I wanted right on the first time,” Celestia said.
“I would say we might even have some of the bond left,” Discord said, trying to hold a light tone to his voice, but failing miserably. Discord turned away, not looking at the white mare.
“Why bother playing those two?” Discord asked. “They’re just the beginning and the end, so many more things happened in the middle that are worth viewing than those.”
“Because those were the two I hadn’t let go of yet,” Celestia said simply. Discord gave her a solemn look in return.
“I’m glad I had that bottle of wine,” Discord said, heaving a huge sigh. Celestia spared him a smile.
“Anyway, here’s the thing I wanted to give to you earlier,” Celestia said, her horn glowing again. Discord watched as an object was lifted by the magic towards him. It looked just as it had when he first plucked it from the earth.
“I’ve preserved it with magic,” Princess Celestia told him as the rose came closer and closer to the stunned draconeqqus. “I told myself I’d stop once I had let go, and thousands of years later... that time’s come.”
Discord extended his talon, and gently grasped the stem. As he did so, he blinked, and a flash of memory overtook him.
“Here, take it.”
“Take it back,” Celestia told Discord. As he held it, her magic fell from the rose, and in an instant, it turned black and crumbled away into little pieces of millennia-old dust.
Discord looked over at Celestia. The Princess returned her gaze to the chaos spirit, and he saw for the first time in so many long ages that her eyes were devoid of hate.
“You do look rather sharp in that suit,” she admitted. The draconeqqus smiled softly.
“What, you’re not afraid of the ego constricting you any more?” Discord asked.
“Nah, I felt it shrink considerably in the past few moments.”
Discord cringed. “Ouch.” Celestia smiled back at him playfully.
“Now come; we’ve got a ball to attend.”
