Derpy's Pet Problems
Derpy looked around the cottage. She sighed sadly at the sheer..emptiness. It had only been a few hours since Dinky had left to move to Pipsqueak's house, but Derpy was missing her daughter already. She chuckled to herself, but it was a hollow laugh. Why am I so upset? I'll see Dinky almost everday!
True, her daughter was working in the Letter Sorting department of Ponyville's main mail company, where Derpy had to go every morning to collect her load of letters, but only until she could get better work, and Derpy knew she would miss her daughter's company too. Dinky never failed to put a smile on her mother's face. As a filly, she would always be jumping around, burbling about what she'd done at school. Her cutie mark, a bundle of magical sparkles, had resulted in a large party thrown by Pinkie Pie. It had also turned out to be one of the best points in Dinky's life - when Twilight Sparkle, magic prodigy, student of Princess Celestia and twice-time saver of Equestria, asked Dinky if she wanted to become her student.
Dinky could only nod...But a few minutes later, as it all sank in, she began jumping around yelling 'YESYESYESYESYESYESYESYES!!!' at the top of her voice. Derpy had seen a flicker of warm familiarity in Twilight's eyes, and knew her daughter had been placed in good hooves. She'd been taught by Twilight for a few years, until the lavender unicorn decided that Dinky had learnt as much as she could from her mentor. Dinky had seemed a bit devastated at this, but she accepted it all the same. Then, as the time she'd spent studying with Twilight was replaced with outings with her friends, Dinky developed a crush - nothing unnatural for a mare her age.
More often than not, Dinky would come in and start going on about how cute/smart/handsome the stallion she'd seen around town was. That was an odd thing about her daughter, Derpy mused. She'd never had a crush on any other stallion, it was always Pipsqeak. Smiling to herself, the grey pegasus remembered how elated her daughter had been when her long-time crush asked her out on a date. She'd acted in a similar way to almost every child's reaction to getting their cutie mark, before she'd sped upstairs yelling a quick ''Going to look for an outfit, might miss dinner!'' behind her. They'd barely be seen apart since. Sure, they'd had their arguments...Derpy recalled Dinky's sobbing, one night after a party. They'd had a huge fight that had escalated into a stream of insults, the subject long forgotten. The next morning Pip had arrived on their doorstep, a bouqet of roses in his mouth. Derpy had invited him in, albeit a little begrudgingly, and he and Dinky had gone upstairs to talk. A few hours later they both came down, hoof in hoof.
Derpy smiled again, the memories heartwarming. They seemed perfect for each other, working through the tough times with smiles on their faces. Derpy knew love when she saw it, so it came as no surprise when her daughter came away from her 20th birthday party with a glinting proposal ring. For the next few weeks, Dinky and Pip moved at lightspeed to get the wedding organised. Both of them wanted to be married as soon as possible, and when they finally tied the knot, Derpy knew she hadn't been the only one crying. Her little filly, all grown up. Then, a few months later, Dinky gathered her stuff and moved to a sweet cottage that was not unlike Fluttershy's, save for the lack of animals and fields. Derpy was sure that right now, they'd be settling in. The grey pegasus sat up and focused her eyes. She was incredibly happy for her daughter, but that didn't help the unending lonliness. Derpy glanced outside the window, watching Applejack and Winona pass by. Derpy gasped a little, and her eyes drifted apart as she began to think.
Derpy knew she wasn't a dumb pony, but she wasn't particuarly smart either. Her plan was fairly simple, nothing too complicated. She knew her daughter had gotten all her brains from her father...Derpy frowned a little. Dinky's father, a stallion who had left before Dinky had even opened her eyes. She shook her head free of the dark memories and continued her wobbly flight to towards Fluttershy's house. It wasn't long before the yellow pegasus' cottage came into view. Swooping downwards, Derpy stumbled a bit before coming to an unsteady halt. Lifting a hoof, she knocked on the door.
''Just a minute! No, Angel, come back here! I mean, if you don't mind...Please!''
Derpy's confusion was resolved moments later when a snow white bunny, probably Angel, came bouncing through the open window, a carrot in his mouth. The door was thrown open, and Derpy narrowly missed taking a door to the face. Fluttershy flew swiftly out, grabbing the white bunny and lifting it above the ground.
''Now Angel, you know it isn't time for your carrot yet.'' She scolded him softly. Derpy stood up and shook her head to clear it, though her 'derp eyes' stayed. Fluttershy only just seemed to notice the grey pegasus, and gave a squeak.
''Oh, my. I'm sorry Derpy, I didn't mean to hurt you..Are you okay?'' She asked, concern in her voice.
Derpy smiled. ''I'm fine, Fluttershy. I've taken worse hits than that in the past.'' Both ponies knew this was true; No pony would be forgetting the damage Derpy had caused the Town Hall in a hurry. An awkward silence passed, broken only by the occassional thud from Angel as he gently kicked his owner. Eventually, Derpy remembered why she was here, and the silence was shattered.
''I'm here because I'd like a pet, please!''
Fluttershy's face lit up. ''Oh, how wonderful!'' She fluttered gently into the air. ''I'll just be right back, Angel Bunny is getting annoyed with me.'' She dissapeared into the house. A few minutes she returned, minus the white bunny. ''Right then, what pet did you have in mind?'' She asked, a smile on her face.
Derpy frowned, realizing the lack of thought that she had put into this situation. ''Err....''
Fluttershy, noticing the pegasus' confusion, seemed to smile wider. ''Oh, you're not sure?'' Not giving Derpy time to reply, she pulled her forward. ''Come on! I have so many pets for you to choose from! I think a lizard or a bird would suit you just fine!''
Derpy, surprised at the normally meek pegasi, let herself be pulled along. Seconds later, they stopped by a bird house.
''Take your pick, and we'll see how they like you!''
''Wuzzat?'' Derpy blinked.
Fluttershy gestured slowly around. ''Pick which one you like best, and we'll see if you two get along! There's no use in having a pet if you haven't got a bond with them!''
Derpy nodded slowly. She glanced around, and spotted a sweet-looking orange hummingbird perched on the tree above. ''That one, I guess?'' She lifted her hoof to point, but as soon as she moved, it fluttered away, startled. Derpy frowned a little. ''Hey, birdy! Come back!'' She started to trot after it, ignoring Fluttershy's shocked. ''Oh!'' as the other birds started to fly away.
''Wait!'' Fluttershy called, darting after Derpy. ''You'll scare the ani- Oh, my...''
Derpy was stood triumphantly, pinning down the bird under her hoof. Fluttershy could see she wasn't hurting the bird, but panic spiked through her anyway. ''Derpy!'' She gasped, nudging the pony's hoof away with more force than intended. The bird twittered adgitatedly and flew away. Derpy gave her a confused look.
''What? I was only holding it down, I wasn't hurting it!''
''Well, you weren't hurting it yet, but knowing you, you could've lost your balance like you always do and squished it!''
Seconds after Fluttershy processed what had come out of her mouth, she slapped her hooves to it. ''Oh, I'm so sorry! I didn't mean...'' Her apology was muffled, but it didn't take a genius to notice she was upset.
Derpy shook her head. ''No, Fluttershy, you're right. I apologize, I sometimes just forget that I'm not...well, like other ponies...'' She trailed off. Again, an awkward silence stretched between the two.
''Well, we may as well look at the lizards..''
Derpy nodded, and the two trotted towards a large gathering of trees, sticking out from the Everfree Forest.
Creatures not too different from Gummy seemed to cover the trees, eyes closing and opening irreguarly. Derpy instinctively shifted closer to Fluttershy, who was acting calm as ever.
''I'm not sure about this, Fluttershy...''
Fluttershy giggled a little. ''That's exactly what Pinkie said when I took her to the Alligator Lake! You'll be fine - all of these animals are very gentle, and they aren't really that smart either.''
Derpy nodded, but didn't stop glancing around warily. ''Well..How will I pick? There are so many...''
''Simple! There's a pond just up ahead, and sunlight filters through the treetops. Many of these lizards go there to drink at least once a day, so you'll be able to see if there are any you like.''
True to her word, Fluttershy led Derpy to a sunlit clearing. The light danced on the water, reminding Derpy of the Flutterpony hollows in children's storybooks. In a sudden flash of memories, Derpy was reminded of the times she had spent reading with Dinky. Derpy had been fascinated by the musical seaponies, although Dinky preferred the mythical humans. She'd listen for hours to her 'Human Mythology' tapes. Feeling calmer, she glanced around, and spotted a lavender lizard, almost the same colour as Dinky's fur. She slowly walked up to it, careful not to disturb it. ''Fluttershy.'' She whispered. ''I like this one!''
''Huh? Oh, that's wonderful! Let's see if it likes you too..''
A few minutes later, Derpy and Fluttershy were on their knees, watching the lilac lizard. Tentatively, Derpy reached out to stroke it. Instead of reacting skittishly like the bird, it seemed to shift closer to her. Fluttershy muffled a squee.
''This one...'
Fluttershy nodded. ''I think you'll get along just fine.''
Derpy knocked on Fluttershy's door for the second time that day. She had agreed to help Fluttershy in cleaning her cottage in return for her help and the free lizard. Fluttershy had insisted that she didn't need to do anything in return, but Derpy had admitted she disliked 'charity' and always tried to return something to ponies when they gave something to her. Relenting, Fluttershy had agreed on letting Derpy help her clean up her cottage once she had returned the newly-named Ditzy Lizard to her house.
The door opened and out came a very embarrassed looking pegasus. ''Uh, Derpy, I think you should see this..''
''What?''
Fluttershy stepped away from the door, revealing a very familiar lizard.
''Ditzy!'' Derpy's voice was confused. ''Why are you here?''
''She just came back! I've been trying to get her back to your house, but she just won't leave! I swear I didn't steal her! I've never stolen an animal except for that one timeandpleasedon'tbemadatme..EEK!''
Derpy very gently pushed her hoof into Fluttershy's mouth. ''It's fine.'' Truthfully, it wasn't. Derpy felt slightly dejected at the lizards choice of owner, but seeing the state Fluttershy was in, she decided to keep her feelings to herself.
''Sorry...I just..I made a promise I'd never take an animal again.''
Derpy jumped a little as Fluttershy's apologetic voice spoke up.
''It's OK..I guess I'll just help you clean up.''
A little less than an hour later, Derpy and Fluttershy regarded their handiwork(...uh, hoofiwork?) proudly. The floor, previously littered with animal feed, was clean as a whistle. The window's were clear, letting the summer sun in. Fluttershy turned to her friend.
''Thanks for the help, Derpy. I would never have managed to do all this on my own! ....Derpy..?''
The grey pegasus had fallen silent, her eyes spacing. Suddenly, they snapped into focus again. ''Hey Fluttershy, can I take a look at that kitten?''
Fluttershy lifted her gaze to where Derpy was pointing. ''Oh, Fluffy? Of course!''
The two trotted over to the white kitten. It looked up at them with innocent-looking blue eyes. It took a step forward, the seemed to trip over itself. Derpy giggled. ''Aww, it's so sweet.''
Fluttershy smiled. ''Well then, I'll get her stuff! She'll be ready and packed for your house in ten minutes.''
In the present, a tired pegasus awakes from her slumber as a meow fills her ears...
Derpy opens her eyes drowsily, before closing them again. A second 'meow' rings in her ear, and she forces her eyes open long enough to look around and oh, sweet Celestia, what has that cat done to the furniture.
Author's Note:
HI! :D First one-shot..ever..
Not much to say. Sorry if the end looks a bit weird, I was aiming for something that looked like it came out of Homestuck, but....
