Maid For Chaos

by Draconian Soul

Rating: mature
Tags: Alternate Universe, Main 6, Comedy, Sex, Discord, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 6059

Eris will work for you absolutely free, so long as she gets to have some fun. You can also pay her 400 bits in advance. Either way, she will always get the better end of the deal.

Eris decides to open up a maid service. For the low low price of absolutely nothing, she will clean, cook, and do everything else but the windows, and all the customers have to do is let her have some fun with them. Of course, you could pay the initial 400 bits for her maid services, but who would pay that much for a free maid?

Doesn't really matter, because either way, she's gonna have fun. Too bad the customers won't.

Edited by Flint Sparks and Pre-Read by Skeeter the Lurker.

Happy Birthday Mr101: You Magnificent Bastard

Published 2014-02-12 05:20:08 UTC
Last updated 2014-02-12 05:20:08 UTC

At Your Service (She Doesn't Do Windows)

“Hey, yoo hoo!”

Eris, the Goddess of Chaos, tapped against what felt like glass and cleared her throat.

“Anyone there? I would really hate to be talking to myself, especially since what I have to say might entice you. You care to listen?”

Eris didn’t wait for the crowd to respond back. She snapped her fingers, sending a cushion on top of a fish bowl. She sat down and crossed her legs, smiling widely.

“Well, since you’re all being such wonderful guests, allow me to explain why I’m here! You see, I’ve been awfully bored recently, and I need something to do. This poor girl gets a little lonely sometimes, and I want to be able to contribute to the better good of society. I mean, what good am I sitting around, wallowing in the worthlessness that I have become? A reformed shell of my former self.”

She pulled a handkerchief out of nowhere and blew her nose, sniffling lightly. “I’m sorry. I tend to get a little emotional sometimes. But like I was saying, I want to do something nice for the little town of Ponyville, if you would hear me out.”

“Um, who are you talking to?” Dusk Shine glared at Eris.

“Oh, just the eager crowd over there!” She pointed into the distance. Dusk Shine and her friends, despite knowing nothing was there, decided to look at where she had pointed.

“There isn’t anypony there,” Applejack stated, glaring back at Eris.

“Ah, but I assure you, there is a crowd out there,” Eris said, holding a claw out and forming it into a telescope. “To the naked eye, there is nothing but blue, blue skies and empty streets. But when you look closer, and you look past the horizon, you might notice there are others out there, listening to every word we’re saying right now.”

“Oh, oh! Is this like one of those games where you’re supposed to find the hidden group of ponies or something?” Bubble Berry asked, trotting in place. “Those are fun! Can we play? Can we, can we?”

Eris blinked, eventually brushing off the nature of the pink stallion. “Anyway, that’s not too important right now. Today, I just want to introduce a little service I wanted to do, as a token of my appreciation of our ever growing friendship.” Eris formed her hands into the shape of a heart, visible representations to float through her hands. The group, with the exception of Butterscotch and Bubble Berry, all glared at her, unconvinced about her intentions.

“And just what exactly are you trying to pull, huh?” Rainbow Blitz snarled.

“Oh, I’m not trying to pull anything! I’m just here to help out this wonderful, little town of yours.”

“How so?” Dusk Shine questioned.

“I thought you’d never ask.” Eris took the handkerchief that she blew her nose with and shook it out. The fabric instantly turned into sleek paper with her mucus turning into ink. She levitated the paper towards Dusk Shine, who was reluctant to take it. “Well, Prince Dusk Shine, would you do me the honor of reading my proposition?”

“Um… oookay?” Dusk Shine brought the paper closer to him with the other five bunching together to read the scroll.

To anypony who would read this,

I, Eris, have been a real pain to you all in the past.

“That’s putting it a little lightly, don’t you think?” Rainbow Blitz said.

Elusive brought his hoof against his mouth, silencing him. “Quiet. Let Dusk Shine concentrate on the scroll.”

I would like to make it up to everypony in Ponyville by making an offer that you would be insane to refuse. And that’s coming from me, the looniest of the loons! This proposition I give you, is the maid of Ponyville. All yours, for the incredibly low low price of… get ready to have your mind blown….

FREE!!

The entire groups eyes rose. “Free?”

That’s right! F-R-E-E: Free! No bits! No cost! Not a single catch to it… except for one.

Dusk Shine turned towards Eris, raising an eyebrow. “And, what is this catch?”

“Is it lunches?” Berry Punch asked. “I could do free lunches!”

“Free food is always nice, yes,” Eris said. “However, that is not my request. You will find out what it is when you read a little further, my friends.”

Dusk Shine continued reading the scroll, a frown growing on his face as he read down.

In order to receive the free services from me, all you have to do is let me have a little fun while doing so. Just a teeny weeny, itty bitty amount of fun. Just enough so that I don’t get bored.

Applejack looked towards Eris. “Um, no offense, but your idea of fun isn’t exactly what we would consider fun. In fact, it’s kinda irksome.”

Eris frowned, poking her lips out a little. “Are you implying that I’m a troublemaker?”

“Yes!” The five said in unison.

“Well, to be fair, Eris, you can be a little bit annoying,” Butterscotch said, carefully crafting his words. “Just a little bit. Not that I mind though, but others might not like your… style of expressing yourself much.”

Eris’s eyes began to water, and she turned around, huffing in frustration. “Well, fine. You don’t have to take my free services. Here I was, trying to be a good citizen to society, and you shoot down the favor because you don’t like my idea of fun! If that’s the case, you can always take the other route, and do the one with the fee!”

Dusk Shine rolled his eyes and continued reading.

In the event that somepony doesn’t want to let me have fun (which makes you a sourpuss), then you can opt out and pay a fee. The fee shouldn’t be anything that’s too impossible to handle. All it is is the low price of 400 bits. All decisions are final and binding. If you don’t like the results (and I guarantee you will), then I will pay you fifty bits if free, or your money back if paid.

“My goodness! You call 400 bits a low price?” Elusive called out. “That is absolutely outrageous. I mean, I could afford it if I wanted to, but this isn’t exactly the richest town.”

“Well, that’s the price of not letting me have some fun, now isn’t it? I gave you an alternative, but you all decided against it. I’m sure everypony else in the town won’t be so mean about my offer!”

“Everyone else?”

As it turns out, Eris had been spreading the news of her maid services throughout the town. How would that be possible when she is at one place at the time? Simple. She duplicated herself in order to go to multiple places at one time. She passed them out to every pony in town, giving similar speeches about how she had been reformed wanted to help out. Both stallions and mares received the request. No one was spared from the good news that Eris was bringing to them, and she stated her case in the best way possible.

“Thanks for the explanation, cutie! It would have been a hassle trying to say it all myself.” After giving her thanks, she blew me a kiss, which somehow landed smack dab on my flanks (yes).

“Wow, that guy is really nice!” Bubble Berry exclaimed, turning towards seemingly nothing. “Thanks, nice guy!”

Elusive blinked and moved closer to him. “Um, who exactly are you talking to?” he whispered in Bubble’s ear.

Bubble Berry turned towards Elusive and gave a wide, toothy grin. “I haven’t a clue!”

Elusive slapped his hoof to his face and sighed.

“I don’t buy anything that you’re saying, Eris!” Rainbow Blitz flew up to Eris, staring her down. “You? Trying to be a good citizen out of the blue? Who do you think you’re trying to fool here?”

Eris crossed her arms. “Why, I’m offended! I would think that the so called Elements of Harmony would be a little more trusting of their friends!”

“Have you given us any reason to trust you?” Dusk Shine asked. Eris opened her mouth, but then paused, failing to find anything to retaliate with. “That’s what I thought. No offense, Eris, but your services seem kind of superfluous, and quite frankly questionable.”

“B-but—”

“There aren’t any buts to be said, Eris!” Rainbow Blitz interrupted. “You can take your maid services somewhere else! We aren’t interested.”

Eris’s lips quivered violently, her eyes welling up with tears. Rainbow Blitz rolled his eyes, believing it was just one of Eris’s manipulative reactions. Most of the group considered that the case too, and brushed her sobs off as her trying to get a hand of the situation.

“Aww, don’t be mean to her,” Butterscotch spoke out, flying closer to Eris. “She might have done wrong in the past, but you should never mistreat friends, and always give them a chance to prove themselves.”

“We’ve given her chances, Butterscotch,” Applejack said. “A number of times, if I’m correct. This fugitive ended up messin with mah apples and turned them all brown!”

Elusive huffed. “The ruffian switched my mane with Applejack’s! Applejack’s of all ponies. No offense, of course.”

Applejack just glared at him, not responding to his statement.

“She ended up changing the weather to freezing hail when I was on weather duty!” Rainbow Blitz exclaimed. “And I got in trouble for it!”

“Oh, but she did make it rain apple cider that one time!” Bubble Berry said.

“Yeah, but that nearly flooded the entire town, remember?” Dusk Shine reminded.

“Oh yeah.” Bubble Berry put his hoof against his temple, and stuck his tongue out, thinking long and hard about the situation. Before long, he gave up and shrugged. “Then I got nothing.”

“Butterscotch, it’s not that we don’t want to trust her,” Dusk Shine began, “it’s that we can’t trust her, especially since some of her past shenanigans were quite recent.”

Butterscotch frowned and shook his head. “I’m very disappointed in all of you. I thought we were past this. Eris is here, pouring her heart out for us, and all you’re doing is berating her because of some mistakes she’s made in the past. Noponies perfect, but you have to believe that there is some goodness inside of them.”

Eris nodded, smiling. “All I ask is just one chance. I can be a good girl. See?” She pointed towards her head to prove her point, however what was on her head wasn’t too reassuring. Two red, curved horns were sticking out of her skull. “Woops! Those aren’t supposed to be there!” Eris tapped her head, making the horns vanish and replaced by a golden halo. “Ah, much better! Sorry about the other one. That was going to be saved for something else.” She rocked in the air and whistled, which didn’t help her case all too much.

Butterscotch patted Eris on the back, causing her to purr lightly. “If she wasn’t trying to make up for her mistakes, she wouldn’t have come here offering her servitude to us. She just wants a little room to have fun and breath. Afterall, you can’t change somepony overnight. They need love and support in order to thrive.”

Eris rang a bell over Butterscotch’s head, causing her to jolt. “That’s what I like to hear! I’m pretty sure that you won’t mind me proving myself by doing having you my first customer, right?”

Butterscotch’s eyes widened and he gulped. “Wait, what?”

Eris grabbed Butterscotch and squeezed him between her arms. “You’re the Element of Kindness, my sweet Butterscotch. You were the first one to defend me and my services when those big meanies shot it down. Surely you, the kindest of stallions in Equestria, could help me prove my usefulness, and bring a good name to myself.”

Butterscotch looked up at Eris, and then back at his friends. Rainbow Blitz shook his head, a scowl apparent on his face.

“Butterscotch, you don’t have to do it,” he said. “Just say no! She can’t be trusted.”

Biting his lips, he looked back at Eris, whose eyes were gleaming. It was soul crushing to watch her look at him with those pain filled eyes. With a sigh, Butterscotch turned towards his friends and stated his decision.

“We have to give Eris the benefit of the doubt,” he began, “and if that means that I will have to be the test to see if she is being honest, then I will do it.”

Eris twirled around in the air, looking happier than ever. “Oh, thank you Butterscotch!” She planted a wet kiss on his cheek, causing him to blush. “You don’t know how happy you’ve made me.”

And just like that, Eris vanished, dropping Butterscotch on the ground. Funny how he forgot to fly. You’d think that a pegasus would remember they had wings. Guess Butterscotch isn’t the most coordinated of fliers, not that that would surprise anyone.

But just as soon as Eris left, she came back, in an all new attire. Man, you should have seen it. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a maid rock an outfit quit like Eris did. Frills as far as the eye could see, traveling up to a low neckline, revealing her tight, slim chest. A myriad of black and white covered her curves. She also had a hemline that ran high up her legs, which were short enough to get a little blood flowing down under, yet long enough to leave some room for imagination.

The white frills at her skirt’s hem fluttered in the wind, teasing any passerby with a fleeting glance of her luscious, multicolored rear. Even her tail was laced with the nice, black and white frills, making it more seductive to anypony who crossed her.

“My my, you’re getting awfully descriptive there! Like what you see?”

She knows this old soul all too well.

Applejack raised his eyebrows and cocked his head to the side. “Ah’m just going to assume that she’s completely bonkers and she decided to start talkin’ to herself.”

“Yeah, like that’s hard to believe!” Rainbow Blitz scoffed in a very rude and unnecessary manner. Maybe she never considered that there might be others sitting here, listening to their conversations. Maybe if she considered that, he wouldn’t be acting like a complete dick to Eris. But I digress. That was very unprofessional of me.

Eris pulled up the blouse, leaving just a little cleavage showing, and floated in the air. “Well, Butterscotch, lead the way. I am, as a servant to a prince would say, at your service.”

Butterscotch nodded. “Well, okay. Whenever you’re ready, there is a lot to do in the cottage, if you don’t mind.”

Eris pulled a feather duster out of her cleavage, causing the group to flush a bit. “Oh, I can handle that easily.”

“A-are you going to clean it with… that?”

“Why of course,” Eris answered. “What else would I clean with?”

“S-something that didn’t come from, there,” Butterscotch said sheepishly, pointing at Eris’s perky breasts.

“We’ll discuss that later in detail,” Eris said, rushing Butterscotch off towards his cottage. “But for now, we should get going. I have a looot of work that needs to be done!”

“Well, um, okay.” Butterscotch didn’t resist and allowed Eris to carry him to his cottage.

Dusk Shine watched the two leave, growing more suspicious of Eris’s intentions. “I don’t trust her that much,” he said.

“I don’t either, Dusk,” Applejack agreed. “Ah personally think we should tail them, and see what she’s up to.”

Elusive nodded. “I agree. I would hate to leave Butterscotch with a scheming character such as Eris.”

“Yeah, and while we’re there, we could see how good her services actually are!” Bubble Berry exclaimed, receiving glances of confusion. “What? I’m the only one who was actually considering it? I mean, duh! Free cleaning for just letting her have fun? I practically live for fun!”

“Regardless, it would be best if we kept an eye on her, and made sure she didn’t do anything she isn’t supposed to,” Dusk Shine said, leading the group. “Come on, guys. We’re going to make sure that Eris’s maid service is everything she says it is.”

With that, the crowd trotted, and in Bubble’s case bounced, to Butterscotch’s cabin, to make sure that Eris was on her best behavior while she provided her first day of her services.

Oh, and there was just a little information that Eris forgot to mention in her little letter: She doesn’t do windows. I probably should have reminded her to mention that before we she left, but oh well. It’s not that big of a deal. I’m sure they’ll figure it out.

Butterscotch

Butterscotch and Eris had made it to the cottage near the Everfree Forest. This is where Butterscotch tend the little critters that reside around. But who really wants to go into distinct detail about the silly old house. I’m sure most of you would rather figure out what the maid service is all about.

Eris whistled, scanning the household.

“Wow, this is cleaner than I expected,” Eris said, sliding her fingers on a table and rubbing them together in search for dust. When she didn’t see any, she pouted. “This isn’t going to be fun. If I can’t have anything to clean, then this whole thing is pointless.”

Butterscotch held his hoof out to her. “Sorry, I did a little spring cleaning early this week,” he said. “But you can still help me out with the animals.”

Eris’s eyes lit up. “Oh?”

Butterscotch nodded his head. “Well, if you want to prove that you aren’t doing anything bad like the others think you are, you could always help me take care of the animals. They can be a handful, and I would really appreciate your help.”

Eris put the feather duster she was holding back in her cleavage, sliding it down slowly. Afterwards, she brought her two mismatched hands together, tapping her fingers. “Yes. That might just work out afterall.” She giggled and put the feather duster she was holding during the duration of the walk back in her cleavage, sliding it down slowly. Butterscotch shielded his eyes and flushed. “Guess I won’t be needing this afterall.”

“N-no. I suppose you won’t.” Butterscotch gave an uncomfortable laugh before turning away and looking towards the living room. “If you don’t mind, could you follow me.”

“Why of course, handsome,” Eris said. She trailed behind Butterscotch, following him to the room filled with animals. Bunnies, otters, beavers, and whatever else you could think of crawled around in the house. It was kind of a miniature jungle of cuteness. Butterscotch trotted closer to the little animals, who all swarmed around him eagerly.

“Aw, you all must be hungry. I was in such a hurry to see what the fuss was in town, I forgot to feed you.” A little white rabbit hopped closer to him, folding it’s little arms and tapping it’s feet rapidly. It looked quite angry, and agitated with the stallion, thought that’s not much to say when dealing with a hungry creaton.

“Oh, and I’m very very sorry Angel. I should have made it a top priority to take care of you before I left. But don’t worry, you’ll all have something to eat soon enough. I have a little assistant helping out today.”

In walked Eris, towering over the animals and smirked. Some of them started to shake, scooting away from Eris for some Celestia forsaken reason. It was probably because of her intimidating figure, though personally, I think she looks rather cute in her get up. But most likely it was because she turned the cottage into her playpen during her reformation. Animals tend not to forget being tossed around and tumbling upside down in a floating house. It’s the nature of things.

“They seem a little skittish,” Eris said.

“They’re probably still nervous about… the last time you were here.”

Eris frowned. “Oh, they’re still sour about that?” Eris picked up one of the beavers who squirmed in her arms. “I was just teasing these wittle pwecious cwitters. I would never do anything to harm them on purpose!” She brought the squirrel closer to her, giving it a kissy face. The squirrel squirmed and wiggled around, trying to free itself from the grasp of chaos. Eris, annoyed with it’s squirming, decided to drop it on the floor, under a cushion that suddenly appeared below it. It scurried towards Butterscotch, who stroked it’s fur and looked back at Eris.

“Now Eris, please be more gentle with them. They’re very fragile,” Butterscotch requested. Eris smiled and patted Angel on the head, who had the gall to bite her pretty little finger. Eris shook her hand, flicking the bunnie on the nose and sticking her tongue out at it. Butterscotch shook her head and sighed.

“Well, I’m going to go see how the chickens are doing in the cook, Eris. You can feed these little guys while I’m gone. The food is labeled under the cabinet. I have them labeled so they don’t get mixed up. Some creatures… get interesting side effects when they eat the wrong thing.”

Eris’s eyebrows rose, a sinister yet sexy grin formed on her face. “Oh, really? How… interesting.”

“How so? It’s some food for my little critters.” Butterscotch stared at Eris, waiting for a reply. All she did was shrug and smile. “Well, I guess it doesn’t really matter. Just, please don’t mix them up, okay?”

Eris nodded. “You got it, boss. I think it would be a little better if you directed me to where they were first. You know, so I can find what I’m looking for without searching so much?”

“Well, I suppose that would help out a bit,” Butterscotch said, trotting into the kitchen. Eris followed behind her, giggling to herself. “Um, something wrong, Eris?”

“Oh, no not at all!” Eris tried to contain her giggles to stave off the suspicions. “I’m just happy to have to work for the most caring, kindest of ponies of ponykind!”

“Well, I guess I am,” Butterscotch said sheepishly. Eris could see red forming on his cheeks. Her flattering words have worked on yet another victim, and the game wasn’t even over yet. After leading her into the kitchen, Butterscotch walked towards the counter near the sink and opened it. Rows upon rows of food and feed were lined up with tags labeling the animals.

“Well, here they are,” Butterscotch said. “Now, if you excuse me, I should probably go check on the chickens.” Butterscotch took out the bag of feed and set it on his back. “I’ll be back in a bit to check on the animals.”

Butterscotch began trotting out of the room, until Eris started making noises. Ruffled bags, knocks against wood, and the sound of broken glass, which oddly enough wasn’t even in the cabinet, caught Butterscotch’s attention. “Um, Eris, what are you do—”

Butterscotch blushed at what he was seeing. Eris’s entire head was crammed inside the cabinet. The only thing that was visible was her backside, and some wind blowing her skirt upwards. Where the wind came from, I have no clue, but it did help give him a good view at what was down below. Her sweet, luscious flanks, and her tight, cute little vagi—

Wait, a target? That’s wasn’t there before!

“Well, I can’t have you guys getting a good look at my lady bits just yet!” Eris poked her head through the wood of the other side and winked at both me and Butterscotch. “I’m going to make you guys work for it a bit. Still, it’s a nice little rear isn’t it?”

She shook her censored rump around, swaying it from side to side. I have been instructed that I can’t say in detail about how sexy this was, but I assure you, it was really really hot. So hot that Butterscotch got a little stiffie just looking at it.

He turned away from Eris and swiftly made his way out of the room, hiding his embarrassment as best as he could. With the stallion out of the way, Eris had free reign to do whatever her heart desired, and a devious smile formed on her face. With a snap of her fingers, the labels for each animal got mixed around.

“Oh dear! I could have sworn these bags were arranged differently. Oh my, what if the tags aren’t correct? Afterall, I don’t think that fish eats carrots!” Eris pulled one out and observed it, still giggling at her antics. “Oh well, Butterscotch knows best, and I need to do my job correctly. Oh Aaangeeeeel!” The rabbit came hopping to her, with his arms still folded. “Come get this cabbage you apparently are allergic to but is marked on your box." She put the cabbage in front of Angel, who gobbled it down without a second thought. There were no adverse effects on him yet, but Eris knew it was coming.

“Now, to feed the other pets. Come together, my little ones! I know you’re really hungry now.”

She continued feeding the animals according to the bag labels. They got as random as feeding beavers bird seeds, or the birds carrots. There were even random mixtures that would offset their feeding habits. Eris smiled in childlike wonder as she caused some disruption in their feeding patterns. Granted, this wasn’t the best she could do, but when all someone can do is feed animals, there is only so much that can be done. However, that wasn’t going to make her stop having her little slice of fun every now and then.

Eris went to the last of the animals, dropping the fish’s ‘food’ into his tank. “Well, here’s your fish for the night. Not sure if it’s a female or not, but if you want, you can eat it if you catch my drift.”

Eris winked and nudged the bowl with the disturbed fish scooting away from the companion inside of it. Eris huffed and turned away.

“Well, be ungrateful then. I did my part.” She rubbed her hands together and cackled lightly. “Time to go pay my friend a visit.”

Just outside the cottage in the backyard, Butterscotch was pulling the bottom of the feed bag along the ground, causing the chickens to follow him for their food.

“Good chickens,” he said through his teeth. “Now, just follow me to the coop. You shouldn’t be out here roaming around like this.”

Butterscotch almost had them near the cottage when he bumped into the Eris’s pelvis. Butterscotch turned around, slightly confused. The chickens scattered at the sight of her, causing Butterscotch to sigh

“Eris, what are you doing here?” he asked.

“Well, I finished feeding your pets, so I wanted to come and help you out here.”

Butterscotch shook his head. “No, that’s alright, Eris. I’m perfectly capable of finishing up the rest. All I have to do is clean out the chicken coop.”

Eris pushed Butterscotch to the side and waved her hand around. “Oh, you won’t have to worry about that!” Eris exclaimed, winking. “I’ll help you out with that.”

Butterscotch decided it was best to not argue it anymore, and just went along with the suggestion. “Well, I guess I could use the help.”

Eris then proceeded to drawing out the feather duster from her mammaries once again, causing Butterscotch to once again flush. There could have also been a little stiffie coming from him, but there was more attention spent on the her chest than his nethers.

“Um, why do you keep putting it there?” Butterscotch asked.

“Well, where else am I supposed to put my stuff? I’ve already filled the other places.”

“W-what?”

“Trust me, you don’t want to know. And even if you did, I can’t go into full detail on that. That’s pretty descriptive, even for a mature audience.”

Butterscotch didn’t go into it more, though I might have to ask about that during my off time.

Eris then crawled into one of the chicken coop, barely able to fit in. Once again, her exposed bottom, or at least as much exposure as she would allow us, was revealed for all to see. Butterscotch turned away so he couldn’t see the tease that was Eris. I’m sure most of you aren’t here for the chickens though, so lets refocus attention back on the sexy goddess herself.

Eris lightly dusted the inside of the coop, gagging at the smell of it.

“Bleh, this is horrible!” She coughed and plugged her nose. “How does Butterscotch constantly clean out after these filthy things? They smell like musk and sex, on top of manure. What do these things—”

And that’s when the idea hit her. The idea that would cement her fun and give her the thrill she had been lacking. With her magic, she snapped off part of her tail and sent it towards the bag of feed while Butterscotch wasn’t looking. She pulled the bag, enticing the chickens to follow her to the coop with it. A few of the chickens chased the bag, pecking at the ground whenever the feed would show up. Butterscotch took notice of the actions, and turned around, horrified by the sight.

With a loud squeak, he covered his eyes with his hooves. “I’m not seeing that, I’m not seeing that, I’m not seeing that.” He kept shivering, blocking out his vision. Everything fell momentarily. He grew more curious and startled by the silence. Prying his hooves away from his face ever so slightly. The area was empty, and there wasn’t a sight of anyone in the area. Butterscotch stood up and looked around, growing more concerned by the second.

“Um, Eris? Chickens? Anypony?”

What he heard next both startled and confused him. The entire chicken coop was sent into a frenzy, feathers flying out of the side. The chickens all squawked loudly, both Eris’s body and their wings being flailed around.

“Eris! What are you doing in—”

“Oh, Butterscotch,” she moaned. “Your cock is all over me!”

Butterscotch’s face was completely red. He ran towards the cottage to try and shush her.

“Please, Eris!” he begged. “You’re too loud! If somepony was to hear that, they would think I’m… well…”

“I wouldn’t have to be screaming like this if you could keep your cock under control! It’s all over me, rubbing against my chest! How am I supposed to work under these conditions!”

Butterscotch tried desperately to get Eris to calm down, but his efforts seemed to be in vain. It was made worse by the fact that they were in a very open area where their voices could be echoed a good distance. If anypony was to suddenly trot by, they would hear everything. And that’s exactly what Eris was hoping for.

“Oh, and now it’s on my face! Your cock is on my face!” Eris moaned playfully, barely able to contain her giggles. “Oh, it’s soooo hooooot!”

“Eris, please—”

“Oh, ow! It’s slapping me! It’s slapping me! Oh, now it’s crawling towards my mouth! Get your cock away from my mo—”

“ERIS! PLEASE STOP!”

“Fine, fine! Sheesh, it was just a little fun.”

“Well, you were taking it a little too far. I don’t like yelling at you like that, but I don’t want people thinking that I want to do that to you.”

“Oh, but that’s not what your other half is telling me.

“Wait… I uh…”

“Wait indeed. Something isn’t right. I think we’re missing something. Like, someone is supposed to be here but isn’t.”

Oh, sorry about that. I went off to… do stuff. Yeah, that’s it. But with that said, yes, Butterscotch had a boner. A big, raging boner from thinking about his cock rubbing against Eris’s face. Again, this isn’t relevant to anything about me, but it’s important to know why Butterscotch had one. Also, Eris giggled at that. I don’t know why.

“Um, Eris, if you don’t mind, I would like you to leave,” Butterscotch demanded. “I-I don’t think I’ll need your services anymore. Especially not… after that.”

Eris frowned, ignoring the fact that her clothing was sliding down. “Aww, but I liked working for you!”

“While that might be so, I don’t feel comfortable with you around. I would like you to kindly leave, and I’ll finish the rest from here.”

“The rest?” Eris raised an eyebrow and flew back towards the chicken coop. “But I cleaned them all out while you weren’t looking!”

Butterscotch blinked and trotted towards each individual one. To his surprise, she was telling the truth. Each one was dusted, swept, washed out, and even refreshened with a dangling, scented egg. Every single one of them. Butterscotch turned towards Eris in shock, who was standing there with a smug smile, and her uniform still sliding down.

“W-wow!” Butterscotch began. “You did a really good job! I thought all you were doing was—”

“Monkeying around?” Eris finished the sentence, tsking and wagging her finger. “For shame. I thought you of all ponies would have been more accepting than that!”

Butterscotch bucked the ground, looking away from her. “Well, you don’t really give me a reason to believe otherwise.”

“True.” Eris cackled. “Maybe I should have been more descriptive about what kind of fun I wanted to have.”

Butterscotch nodded. “At any case, I think you should leave. I-I think I need a little time away from you now, okay?” I personally don’t blame the guy. I could use another alone time, myself… though it’s for completely productive reasons, I assure.

“But, you’ll still put out a good word for me, right?” Eris asked, with wide, puppy dog eyes that only a soulless cur would say no to. Butterscotch sighed and rolled his eyes.

“Fine, I’ll put in a good word for you.

Eris smiled, bringing her hands up towards her blouse. “All I needed to hear.” Suddenly, she decided to give her outfit an extra tug to loosen it. She slid down her outfit, revealing her perky, well rounded br- OH FOR CELESTIA SAKES!

“Apparently these chickens were really attached to me, and they kind of leaned onto these puppies. I think they personally like me.” Eris winked at the flushed and erect Butterscotch, giggling loudly. “Oh, I’m such a cock tease!” And sadly, that she is.

“Please… just go.” Butterscotch turned away and waved his hooves around in hopes to shoo Eris. “And give me back my chickens, please.”

Eris set the chickens in front of Butterscotch, who still refused to look at Eris, afraid that she was still naked, which sadly, I can’t describe, because now she has them covered with more targets. We just can’t win today, can we?

Soon after, Eris flew off into the skyline, grinning at her eventful day and hoping that more events were to come.

“Poor Butterscotch,” she said. “I shouldn’t have used him as bait like that, but I needed a good reference. Hopefully he’ll put in a good word for me, since I did do what he asked… even though the bags did get a bit mixed up.” A cruel laugh elicited from Eris’s lips. She soared through the air with great joy, finally able to legally be able to wreak havoc, under the guise of a maid. Her excitement grew with each thought, and it was only a matter of time before she would have her way.

“Oh, and by the way, since you were so self controlled today, I’ll give you a little peek, okay?”

Well… oh… she’s taking off her outfit again. And not targets. Well, this has been an eventful day. As much as I would like to describe what makes up her curvy, delectable, and quite fascinating body, I’m afraid I made a promise that I wouldn’t give full detail of her yet, and therefore you have to wait. I know. I could have been cool and gave you a little sneak peek at what’s to come, but I’m too selfish for that.

I guess you can say… you’ve just been cock blocked.

Author's Note

You get to decide who's getting the services after next chapter. Character tags will be added when appropriate