Alcohol's Affect On Friendshipping

by ServingSpoon

Rating: mature
Tags: Twilight Sparkle, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Romance, Silver Spoon, Sex, Spike, Diamond Tiara
Length: 3734

Silver Spoon and Diamond Tiara have been told off once before by Twilight Sparkle, at DT's Cutecinera. But when the Librarian gets drunk, she sends letters. And the fillyfooling couple, totally never could have seen this coming!

Credit for title image goes to this artist silverspoonsblogadoodle.tumblr.com/

It's no great secret that Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon are two of the most stuck up and mean little fillies this side of the Everfree Forest. But nopony has had the guts to tell them exactly what they think of them. Until now.

When Twilight Sparkle gets hammered on Granny Smith's moonshine, she takes this time, to write letters. First to her friends. But before passing out in a pool of vomit, she decides to write to the town's well to do, young bullies. Diamond Tiara responds in the only way she knows how while her young lover and presumably better half is struck with images and feelings she can never get out of her head.

Brain bleach anypony?
WARNING! Contains Foalcon and pedofoalic references!

(This is a spinoff of this hilarious fic Alcohol's Effect On Friendship with all due respects to the original author. If I am doing something wrong or you catch errors, constructive criticism is always welcome. This is my first story on fimfiction so please be gentle ;^_^)

Published 2013-11-29 20:10:03 UTC
Last updated 2013-11-29 20:10:03 UTC

Dearest D**kmond Tiara and Silver Tool

Dearest D**kmond Tiara and Silver Tool

Diamond Tiara Rich the Third, lay peacefully in her canopy bed. Her soft pillow cradled her deceptively sweet head, her lavender and white mane having not yet suffered the ravages of "bed mane" due to her restricted movement, keeping her from tossing and turning. Her trademark silver and diamond studded tiara lay on a velvet red pillow on top of the gold and gem encrusted vanity, along side a lovely and rare string of blue pearls, haphazardly strewn across the table top hanging off the edge slightly.

To her right lay her bed table with a digital clock that flashed 3:30am and lying infront of it was a silver case, sitting open, with a pair of large cerulean blue glasses, nestled gently inside the purple velvet lining.

The diminutive debutante was not alone in her bed.

On her left, with a gray foreleg draped over her lover's barrel, was a silver maned filly, snuggled up next to her, with an elegant Prench braided ponytail, her nose nestled closely to Diamond's cheek.

Sylvia Catherine Spoon, "Silver" to those that knew her best, was happily cuddled up next to her lover and mistress. The snoring of the pink filly, not unlike a pig snorting, was no detriment to the silver filly's slumber. In fact the gentle droning of her lover not only did not impede her rest, it soothed her like a kitten close to her mother's heart beat.

Silver Spoon's ears gently twitched with each change in pitch of her bunkmate's cacophony, as if instinctually attuned to every verbal utterance of her mistress, the pony she would forsake all others for.

While Diamond wore an elegant but otherwise nondescript pink sleep mask, Silver Spoon wore a very different accessory, not usually associated with the bed room. Let alone that of a wealthy young aristocrat.

Neither filly at 11 and 12 years of age could comprehend why the simple band of black leather around Silver Spoon's throat or the heavy silver chain attached to it, that now slithered between both the slightly older filly's fore and hind legs, caused their pleasure to be increased as they made love.

Neither could say why it felt so good for them both, when Diamond would yank on her leash, choking her slightly, all the while degrading her and ordering her around to perform tricks and other services, as of late.

It had started off with something simple and innocently enough, one year ago.

Diamond's father; Filthy Rich, and mother; Ruby Tiara Rich the Second, had both refused her request to get a puppy, admitting that they didn't think she was responsible or selfless enough to care for a pet and they had no desire or time to care for it themselves, or put up with the messes it would make.

Heartbroken and dejected Diamond sought comfort and solace in the only pony she has ever been able to open up to since she was 9 years old. Her first and only freind listened intently and dutifully to every whine, sob and whimper. Every complaint about her "Stupid Daddy".

Diamond could not remember another time when she was denied anything her heart desired and was angry and inconsolable. But Silver Spoon had a special talent for charming the most disagreeable of ponies, a talent which would serve her well in her marehood as she hobnobbed with the rich, powerful and elite of Equestria and weaseled her way into their exclusive circles to increase hers and her families' holdings and influence.

A few 100 brush strokes through her friend's mane a few soft spoken words, carefully placed to instil encouragement and peace, and she was right as rain again.

The very next day Silver Spoon went out to Barnyard Bargains; the very store Diamond's father owned, and bought an expensive all black leather collar and heavy chain leash, the type used for larger canines.

To further show her devotion, she had a diamond shaped silver tag custom made but did not dare have any name engraved in it's surface. She didn't know why, but figured she should keep her purchase a secret. She reasoned that it would be an embarrassment to herself and her family if anypony knew what she was about to use them for, especially if those "blank flanks" got wind of it. She could not bare the thought.

And so in the privacy of her best friend's bed room, Silver Spoon revealed her self, wearing her new accessories, holding out the end of her lead in a fore hoof, to a perplexed Diamond Tiara. The same accoutrements that adorned her neck tonight.

Diamond was uncertain what to make of her silly Silver friend, but when Silver Spoon said "I'll be your puppy." with a coy smile, Diamond could not help but return it with a giggle as the pieces fell into place. She gently accepted Silver's offering and placed the leather loop over her forehoof, giving it an experimental tug to find the clasp held fast to her friend's collar, while the silver medallion rang against the D ring of the collar. Silver has been her puppy on occasion ever since.

Over the past year, their pet play intensified as Silver and Diamond bought more pet supplies, dog dishes, chew toys and stuffed animals meant for rough play. The more intense and into her role Silver got, the more excited she became. Diamond to found pleasure in "training" her to do tricks, make her fetch a ball and drink from a bowl on the floor when her parents were not at home.

As long as her father and mother were out, Diamond Tiara could take her puppy for walks on her leash, around the mansion and expansive back yard. It wasn't long before they noticed just how much pleasure they derived as they settled into their respective roles with ease.

Silver seemed especially keen to respond to being punished with a rolled up news paper to her snout or her flanks and hind quarters, for some perceived or imagined misbehavior. Then one night, not too many months ago, they discovered each other and the pleasures of their bodies. A pleasure that seemed amplified when mixed with their puppy play.

But right now Silver couldn't care less, how these radical lifestyle choices served to define her personality well into her marehood as she smiled and mewled contentedly, spooning against her lover with a cold chain pressed into her hot sex, strung out between her legs like a second silver tail.

One would almost suspect she could, even in her slumber, taste both sets of her lovers sweet lips on her own, as apparent by the matted fur on her face, saturated with the dried saliva and nectar from her lovers flower. Silver Spoon didn't even care that Diamond made her do most of the work, and gave her little satisfaction in return, over the course of their little sleepover. She preferred it this way. Serving Diamond Tiara and pleasuring her, gave the highly intelligent, yet insecure silver filly a sense of worth and purpose, where she felt there was little there before.

She knew her mistress may shove her off angrily later, and once back outside Diamond wouldn't even hold her hoof in public, but for now she could hold her special somepony as much as she liked and nothing else mattered.

Before Diamond had fallen asleep she had made sure Silver Spoon was on her proper side of the bed, even though she could still smell her own musk that permeated her lover's face. And it drove her wild.

It wasn't that she didn't like to cuddle, but she demanded her space, for her "Beauty sleep" and Silver Spoon was all too happy to oblige her mistress. She had even joked, half heartedly that she should sleep on the floor like the dog she is. Diamond and Silver both were too tired but to chuckle at that. She hadn't even taken note that Silver forgot to remove her collar and leash. Not that it mattered. The door had been securely locked since Silver Spoon first entered and immediately settled into her role as the fateful pet.

Neither filly was fully aware of the development of their sadomasochistic tendencies. They only knew it felt good to play this way. It felt right. And whatever their bodies were doing to make each other feel pleasure, it was that much better for the both of them if Silver Spoon was kept "in her place".

So Diamond Tiara had drifted off with the memory of the sight of her own juices trickling down her lover's face, like beads of pure diamond, sparkling in the moonlight, framed by Silver Spoon's dopey grin and those bright lavender orbs that burned into Diamond's very soul.

Those eyes.. those beautiful entrancing eyes of hers, unobstructed by the large and ornate frames, was the last thing on Diamond's mind as she finally succumbed to the multiple orgasms Silver had brought her to, and fell into a deep satisfied sleep.

Yes life was good. They were rich, they were popular, they were pretty and they would continue enjoying the forbidden fruits of their foalhood love affair and nopony would be the wiser.

Or so they thought.

CRASH!

Suddenly there was the sound of shattering glass as a wisp of sparkly green flame shattered and broke through Diamond Tiara's bed room window, with the force of a small stone being hurled against it. The sound jolting her out of sleep with a loud snort in mid snore. Her lover fluttered open her lavender eyes as she barely caught a glimpse of a streak of green fire, come brush through the soft silk sheets lining and enclosing the canopy bed, intruding on their solitude, invading the fortress of love and lust they had encamped themselves in so deeply.

Before Silver Spoon's eyes, she could barely make out the green blob curl into a fuzzy ball that enturn formed into existence a long fuzzy white cylinder that fell deftly on Diamond Tiara's face.

"What the hell, Spoon!?" she ripped off her face mask and growled at Silver Spoon before she shoved the amorous silver filly off of her abruptly.

"Wasn't me, DT, I swear!" she pleaded meekly with her mistress.

Diamond took a moment to sit up and wipe her eyes with her hooves. Silver took advantage of her distraction and reached behind DT's back to retrieve her glasses from the night stand. When she placed them on the bridge of her muzzle suddenly the fuzzy white thing now in DT's lap, took shape. "A scroll?"

"Who the buck would send me mail at this hour?" Diamond snarled and hoofed the scroll over "You read it Sil.." she paused to yawn "I'm like, too tired and you like to play secretary anyway." she rolled her eyes as Silver unrolled the scroll and cleared her throat with a hoof to her muzzle, dramatically.

Dearest Dickmond Tiara,

Silver Spoon looked up from the scroll and stoically stared at Diamond, who's mouth hung open slightly "Shall I go on?" she asked as she adjusted her glasses nervously.

Diamond gave a non committal nod, her curiosity peaked, wondering who in Equestria would have the unmitigated gall to speak to her that way, even in a letter.

Dearest Dickmond Tiara,
I do hope Silver Tool is with you, you magnificent thundercunt!

"hmph.. that was rude." Silver Spoon scoffed.

I suspect she is, you are after all attached at the hip.. No seriously.. I bet you scissor about 4 or 5 times out of the day! Shit what am I saying.. that would imply mutual pleasure.. no more like you prolly have Sweet Silver Tool's face burried in your crusty VD infected uterine pipe for hours on end, barely letting the poor dear up for a breath.. I know Silver hhash to be an animal in bed.. any pony that repressed has got to have the stamina of a howler monkey!

Silver Spoon paused, not looking up from the parchment, to hide the raging blush on her cheeks, and the small prideful smirk for the indirect praise.

Diamond Tiara was less then amused.

Shut the fuck up, Spike!

I don't give a good rats flank if their fillies, I'll talk to whomever I choosh, how I choosh, and when I deem fit to do sho!

I am the motherbuckin daughter of Princess Trollestia and after all I've done for this shit water town, if they don't like it, well they can just eat my dick up till they hiccup!

Now you better write what I fuckin say or I will beat you like a red headed mule!

No NOT that you idiot! Don't write that!.. where was I.. oh yea..

Did I ever tell you Silver, that you have the cutest ponytail.. I mean that braided one not your real pony tail.. well I mean your tail and obviously both tails are real.. is nice to.. and those adorkable glasses..

If I was a pedofoal I would throw you in the back of a white nondescript cart an rape your ass with a 12 inch dongdo.. dong-do.. is that a word.. I'm so creative when I'm wasted.. Spike where was I..

No no scratch that.. start over.. YES FROM THE BEGINING you hoof bag! Stop sniveling for Lunasake.. oh Luna.. I would worship that moon all night.. where was I..

Dera.. Dear Diam... Dicktara.. aw fuck it!

Dear Dickmond.. screw you.. I'm talking to the sexy one from now on..

Dear Silver Tool..

no wait I wanted to be nice.. otherwise she'll suspect something when I offer her candy.. and drag her down to my basement and use the rotator in er little underage sliver star...

Silver Spoon looks up to see DT with shock in her face, her blue eyes wide as saucers "Diamond.. I don't know if I want to read more.. I don't know what a rotator or my 'silver star' is but I don't think I want what ever it is inserted into whatever it is on me she's wanting to stick it." Silver whimpered slightly, tears welling up in her eyes as she seeks solace and safety in her master's embrace.

Diamond pulled Silver close to her barrel, wrapping her forelegs around Silver's withers. "There there my Silver pet." she coos an strokes the bangs of Silver's mane, causing her silver lined tail to wag gently under the sheets. "I wont let that bitch harm my special somepony.. I'll bite her leg off if she tries to lay a hoof on you." she promised and took the scroll to read for her self as Silver leaned into her side.

"Thanks Diamond." Silver smiles and wraps her forelegs around Diamond's back and barrel as she presses her cheek to DT's and nuzzles her gently.

Though not in the mood to cuddle and urge to kill rising within her, Diamond put her free hoof around Silver's waist and read on to herself. Silver couldn't help but read over her lover's shoulder. Immediately she wished she hadn't.

What the fuck do you see in that little cunt bubble Tiara?

I mean I bet she makes you do all the work, my little Spoony.. I bet she never lowered herself to eat you out as much as she makes you proly do to her..

You ah virgin.. yeah that's gotta be it.. nothing to compare Dickmunch Tiara with right?

Spike, Is that little bitch, still a virgin?

Mare I would pop that cherry and eat it with a dollup of whip cream and some sprinkles! I would use her cream for my morning coffee.. do fillies lactate.. well obviously they don't.. but Is it anatomically possible?

It's a rhetorical question, you moron.. listen to me be all philosophical and shit... damnit where was I? now I cant get Silver's sweet plot out of my head..

Stupid sexy Silver Spoon!

Rewind! This is now now.. when will then be now? (snort) I'm so fuckin ffunny!

Dearest Silver Spoon.. what a pretty name.. no don't write that!

Dearest Silver Spoon,

Obviously I'll write to you because you're the only one who has half a brain, compared to that little dollup.. I mean trollup.. she's about as dumb as a box of rock farmers.. I mean.. eh you know what I mean..

Now can't get the "pink menace" out of my head ARGH.. no don't write that they'll get all confused because Diamond is pink and Pinkie is well.. pink.. and well their both menaces I guess.. where was I.. oh yes.

Dearest Silver Spoon..

No that was a term of endearment.. don't start the letter over again (a drop of blood stains over a few words)

Why don't you tell that bitch, Tiara, to lay off Applejack's foal.. it aint her fault she's an inbred hick! she's a good filly.. so what if her brother and sister are her mom and dad..

Wait that didn't sound... read that back to me..

It's not Bloom's fault her parents are brother and sister.. yeah that makes more sense.. For Bloom's sister to also be her mother would require some kind of Timey Wimey paradox and shit!

Diamond and Silver exchange glances. They had teased Applebloom about the prospect of being the product of her sister and brother's pairing but never really considered the possibility it was true. "No.." Silver sternly scolded "What.." DT replied innocently "No you are not going to make this a thing!" Silver growled "pfft fine.. whatever." Diamond rolled her eyes.

And leave the little marshmallow alone to! it's bad enough her bish of a sister treats her like a personal fuckin slave and butchers her hair just so hers looks better.. Rarity is an even bigger cunt then Diamond.. I mean that both figuratively and literally.. the fat ass whore.. wonder if their related..

So just leaves Babs.. eh I so couldn't care less... just another earth pony.. no offense.. I got nothing against earth ponies.. they don't strut around and say "look at my legs, their so fuckin pretty, don't you wish YOU could buck trees.." err where was I...

What do you mean there's anther crusader... Oh fuck her in the ass with a cactus.. WAIT that's it.. just start the fuck over.

Dearest Silver Tool.. I said be nice to her.. Don't write what I say.. write what I mean you shimpleton!

Dearest Silver Spooooooooooooooooooon.. he he.. that's funny.. no don't.. go back to the beginning!

Spoon.. Shilver mother fuckin Spoon.. no go back.. yes again!

Dearest Silver.. we'll leave it at that..

You and Dickface should go and pick on Scootalloo.. is that her name? You know the chicken.. she's an embleshile emb.. imbecile. she's got so much feathers on the brian.. she'sh too dumb to fly..

Oh Luna I hate Pegasusss!

They think their so...

Oh fine.. no more speciiest slurs..

I'll wrap this up cause I think I'm about to puke again and pass out..

Basically.. Diamond Tiara.. go back to Tarturus or Los Pegasus.. or where ever you got that GAWD awful valley-filly accent! seriously just shut the fuck up already.. you're worse then Applecrack!

I swear if I ever do get you and Silver Spoon in my basement, the first thing your sorry flanks are getting is a ball gag.. then my dick up your plothole..

Seriously Silver, call me, honey.. if you want a real mare to order you around..

Ditch the looser with the austintacious head gear.. she just wishes she had a dick and is compensating because her daddy raped her when she was 9!

Fuck this.. I'm not in the mood for games you sniveling little Silver shit..

Just come by the library if your interested and i'll check YOU out!

See what I did there? huh huh..

MWAH good night every pony..

I love you Silver Spoon.. I want you to have my foals..

Your fateful Shtudent.. er.. mistress.. Queen of all things magic.. Twilight GRANDMOTHER FUCKIN Sparkle..

I'm out bitches!

-Note From Spike-
I am so sorry Silver Spoon! I am really really sorry! I had no idea Twilight felt that way about you.. the bitch finally passed out.. She's written to you, all five of her friends and the princess to and I haven't had one pony come to help me in like 3 hrs now!

Sorry about the blood.. she hit me with a book and my nosebleed a little.. no big deal.. but not one pony has come to help me.. maybe you can talk with me tomorrow? I need somepony to talk to!

Oh and Diamond Tiara I swear to Celestia if you mention any of this shit to the crusaders, I will hunt your plot down and show you just what a dragon uses a DIAMOND for!

You are a cunt..

That is the first thing Twilight has said all night that I agree with.

Silver looks at Diamond, seeing her left eye twitch slightly and covers her ears with her hooves as Diamond draws in a long deep and foreboding breath.

"DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAADDYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!"

Silver Spoon had just enough time to strip off her collar and leash and shove it under her pillow, before DT's bedroom door cracked under the force of two powerful earth pony hooves and then with one final buck was kicked in and busted to splinters, littering the once pristine fillie's room with it's plush white carpet and pink walls, with shrapnel fit for a queen termite's feast.

At least they had kindling for a fire if they needed it, with the Running of The Leaves just around the corner.

end.