My Friend in Equestria

The sun emerged from the skyline in a blaze of glory, the sky aglow in it's several shades if purple and pink. Truly a sight to marvel at, however, this was absolutely irrelevant to a small lavender mare in the town of Ponyville. A quaint town, with a busy community. Ponies are always found bustling along the paths, meeting and greeting and going on their merry way. The lavender mare called Twilight was doing none of these things. There are many businesses taking residents in Ponyville. A Sofa and quill shop, bakery, cafe, and a Library to name a few. All were open to the whole wide world for every pony to see, except the library. Upon the door lies a hastily scribbled sign marked "Do Not Distrub." Those that know miss Twilight Sparkle would know a dire situation was aloof, for she is rather specific about these kinds of things and wouldn't ever make a simple mistake such as that. Certainly not in spelling.

Miss Twilight Sparkle was scanning a scroll, upon the scroll is a very, very royal seal. She however, marked this as commonplace and was busy fretting over the contents of the scroll. Again. Her associate in paper trade, a dragon by the name of spike, was in a bit of a tiff with her about calming down.

"I AM PERFECTLY CALM!" Twilight seethed. With a twitch in her eye and her hair askew, she leered at Spike. He promptly shut-up. She then proceeded to enact her one sided conversation, of questions, towards Spike. All I can say is he was a right bit confused. The minute purple dragon would try and utter responses, but Twilight would shush him time and time again. Spike's silent prayers were answered when three sharp thuds droned in from the door.

The knocks continued until twilight intervened. "Good!" Twilight interrupted. She was already taking quick strides towards the chariot while the guard moved slowly from behind. With a stamp of her hoof she yelled. "No time!". She climbed on the chariot, gave the signal to lift off, and sped through the evening sky. Exactly leaving the guard behind.

Hurtling through the clouds at break-neck speeds, thanks to Twilight rushing the guard, they were making phenomenal time. All at the expense of the chariot pulling guard of course. With the strain obvious in his voice, the guard spoke up, "I don't know if we should've left that other guard behind."
"He has wings, he can fly on his own." Twilight smartly responded.
The guard, with a vein popping on his neck, turned his head and spoke through gritted teeth, "I don't think he can actually, I had to pull him to your library. He never said anything either, I found it quite strange." Twilight reflected on this and concurred, she then said, "Now that you mention it, he was walking very strange when I walked out the door. His helm was different than any I've seen." Nodding in agreement, the guard replied, "All Princess Celestia told me was that he was to be addressed as The VIP." At his mentioning of the name, all time slowed down. As the word sank in, Twilight's heart skipped a beat and her pupils dilated, she thought back to the letter.

---Earlier---
Dear Faithful Student,

We have a new guest in Canterlot, he arrived unexpectedly on unforeseen circumstances. He doesn't talk, nor respond to any communication we try to make. We are simply designating him the VIP. A chariot will arrive shortly. Others have been sent for the rest.

-Celestia-
---Now---

After watching what he assumed to be his ride fly away with a librarian, the incognito alicorn sat upon his haunches and reflected upon what in his days preceding now lead him to what he assumed to be, very concentrated narcotics. He hadn't ever tried any before, so he didn't quite know if it would hit him hard or not. After stamping his han-hoof, on the ground repeatedly, it occurred to him. "This may just be real?" He questioned aloud. Recoiling from his outburst of English, he tried again, "PooPooPeePeeKaKa!' He cheered, it seemed more a victory on the inside however as it was attracting unwanted (and rather disgusted) attention. Noticing this, he slinked away to the center of town, well, it was rather an awkward shuffle, but it got the job done.

Watching others as he passed, he began to fall in step with them, noting how it was like the Spider Walker from Star Wars Battlefront 2. As he looked elsewhere however, he realized his astute observation would yield blank stares. Everywhere he walked there was no technology of any electronic sort. This was rather distressing, never mind being a friggin' midget horse! The worry in his eyes and his gait, he decide some sugar would calm him down. Looking for a cafe to sooth his mind with caffeine he stumbled into the center of town. At the center stood a majestic fountain, an articulate and rather beautifully crafted statue of magnificent and rather grand horse lay atop of it. Spilling water from spout on it's body. He looked at the statue and laughed.

Passerby's noticed his blatant insulting of their elegant ruler and scowled. As a crowd gathered to watch a Royal Guard of the very statue he was laughing at, a pink pony from the crowd began jumping in the air, head barely reaching above the sea of onlookers. After she realized her persistence was futile, she began jostling and bumping through the crowd. Making her way to the front, she saw the hubbub. A pony was laughing his socks off for no reason, and she wanted to join in so bad. She walked over to the pony and blasted her confetti cannon right behind him.

---6.3 seconds beforehand--

Bursting with laughter over the fact that there was a massive statue depicting horses two feet tall, and the fact that he was one, he began doubling over. Tears streaming down his face from the continuous laughter and anguish, he was interrupted entirely by what seemed to be a thunderclap a foot behind him. Rather than recoil and yelp at the surprise, he did the more efficient thing and spun with a hoof swing for a blow.
---Now---

Near immediately after she fired the cannon, the pony swung around, hoof swinging and knocking the tip of the cannon round. Pivoting 180 at a rather forceful speed, it was like a kick of a ball. The over zealous pink pony being the ball of course. Sent flying, she responded with a yelp of joy as she soared through the air.

Coming into contact with what seemed a blue cannon with his hoof, it spun entirely around and sent the would-be assailant soaring, he winced as she got considerable air and hit the ground with a very, very dull thud. This spurred a gasp from the crowd and a muttering of apologies streaming from the disguised "Royal Guard" as he galloped toward the fallen mare. Noticing a rather dark patch of fur on the side of her head, he pointed a hoof towards a Pistachio ice cream colored pony with rather frazzled grey hair and bellowed, "Get a nurse here right away!"