Alleyways and Airways

"Ow! Hey, watch where you're goin-" The purple creature began the customary greeting, before it devours its prey.

My wings locked at my sides, I trembled, and pushed myself backwards with my talons. Screw being a phoenix, I'd prefer fists to wings right about now.

The creature just stared at me for a second, before a wide grin appeared on its face. Yep, it's gonna eat me.

"Don't eat me, I promise I don't taste like chicken! I taste like burnt flesh! Well, I think so at least, never tried eating myself." But all that came out were squawks. I had a feeling this creature didn't speak bird. Or dinner. What an intelligent tangent I was getting off on.

"A phoenix, wow! I've never seen one so close!" It spoke. So, I find a talking purple thing with a purple ice cream cone sticking out of its head, who speaks English, and has not tried devouring or bisecting me yet. This dream gets weirder and weirder.

"My name's Twilight Sparkle! I'm a student under Princess Celestia studying friendship in Ponyville! Wait, why am I introducing myself to a phoenix?" She asked herself, looking confused. "Oh well, I'm just so excited to see one of you so up close. And when you're not trying to attack me and set me on fire."

Fire.

"Ryan!"

Oh god, how stupid was I? How must Cynthia be reacting? Is my body still ther- No. I can't think like that. I'm just dreaming. But damn, this was realistic. Besides, I think this "Twilight" could smell fear. She was looking at, looking a bit awkward at my giving her the silent treatment.

Well, I'm not gonna stay to hold a staring contest with a giant purple monster. With a flurry, a sqwack, and some luck, I managed to take to the air.

"Hey, wait! Aw ponyfeathers." The purple creature looked disappointed at my grand escape.

It turned around and began walking the way it came.

Given the fact that I had nothing better to do, and was really not scared, and didn't want to see how powerful this creature was, I decided to try and stealthily follow it.

Eventually the creature came across a small hut. It walked inside, a frown fixed on its face.

A rhythmic voice greeted my ear-holes.

"Ah, Twilight, good to see you, my dear. But tell me my friend, what brings you here?"

The voice sounded deep, but female in nature. I flitted to a branch outside a window looking in. I saw Twilight, and... a zebra? Okay, we have talking zebras and talking... What was Twilight? Quadruped. Mane. Horn. Well, I guess if phoenixes can exist in this world, so can talking unicorns.

I crept forward silently on my branch, trying to hear what Twilight was saying.

"- and it was right in the middle of the Everfree Forest!"

Everfree Forest?

I crept forward a bit more.

"A phoenix? That's strange, but that it's not hostile is quite a change."

So the talking zebra talked in rhymes. This dreams keeps getting weirder.

Twilight looked around, and then leaned in to the zebra, whispering something.

I turned my ear towards her, and moved forward a bit more. Unfortunately. that's where the branch decided to end. For the second time that day, I dropped like a stone. Unfortunately, this time, I didn't find myself gracefully soaring above the ground, I found myself flapping in panic, and ending up slamming right into the window of the hut, which was apparently cracked open. I did a spectacular fly into a bottle of something sticky, and then fell backwards into what felt like a pit. I found out later it was a cauldron. Thank god it wasn't being used at the moment.

I'd like to say I popped right out and said something cool that would make my spectacular fail a little more planned, but all that came out were panicked bird noises and Some thrashing about.

Real smooth, Ryan, real smooth.

*********

I took out the feather again and looked at it. I was starting to wonder if this was some sort of nightmare I was stuck in. The touch of the feather made me feel.. trapped. It was like I was surrounded by all sides. There was only way to figure this out. Straight up. Could this be something along the lines of divine int- ...no. That was stupid. There has to be something going on though, something I couldn't understand at the moment. But that doesn't mean I wasn't going to try.

I was so lost in my thoughts, I didn't realize where I was until it was too late.

"Well well well, what have we here? A poor little lost girl? How lucky for us."

Fuck, I'd walked right into an alleyway, and straight into some thugs, by the looks of them.

There were three men, easily six feet each. The one in front had a leather jacket that was zipped up to the bottom of his neck, tattered jeans, and a five o' clock shadow slapped on his otherwise hairless face. He looked like he had a run in with a wall a few too many times, as his nose was rather broad and flat. He had a scar running from the corner of his neck up to one side of his lip, on the other side of his face.

The rest of the men were shrouded in darkness, but I could make out similar clothing fashions. One was holding a metal pipe in his hand.

I slowly backed up, I didn't think I could take out three fully grown men at the same time.

"Marcus, restrain her. Let's see what she has in that little bag of hers."

The man with the pipe stepped into the light. He had black hair tossed carelessly in his face, reaching down to his upper lip. Brilliant green eyes shone through the tangled mane of hair, giving him the impression of someone somewhat attractive that had let himself go with a few too many cups. His face was sharply angled, and he had a sly grin plastered on his face.

"My pleasure, Cap."

His words flowed out like honey, but their intent was all but sweet.

"Stay back, or I can't be held accountable for what happens to you." I said, putting on a front of bravado.

"Ooh, a feisty one" Marcus grinned. "I think I'm gonna enjoy this."

He reached his hand out for me, and I responded by slapping it away.

"C'mon baby, don't be like that. We just want a peek at what you got, and then we'll all move on."

Okay, think Cynthia. Observe your surroundings. I'm in a dark alleyway, I have three guys trying to rob me, one has a pipe, the other two have undetermined weapons.  One is moving to restrain me, one is watching, and the other is guarding the exit. There are no means of escape.

I hit the wall. I  pressed my back and legs to the wall, trying to shrink away from Marcus. My foot hit something solid that wasn't the ground, and that almost knocked me off balance.

A quick look down confirmed it was a brick.

A plan formed in my mind.

A crazy, stupid plan that would most likely get me killed.

My favorite kind of plan.

Marcus stopped in front of my, his breath reeking of alcohol. I instinctively raised my hands to my face. He lunged for my hands. He was quick.

But I was quicker.

I grabbed his hand, and twisted down, rolling down between his legs, at the same time  I kicked his legs out from under him and his face had a sudden meeting with the cold hard ground.

I was about to breath a sigh of relief when the boss grabbed my hands and forced them behind me. He spun me around to face the other thug, who had a gun pointed straight at my face.

Shit.

"Well, we've got ourselves a spitfire here." The big guy laughed. "I think I'm gonna enjoy this."