Snow In Equestria

December 17, 2012

“The punch was spiked!?” Twilight cried from the inside of the throne room.

Oh, that made sense. I had suspected that alcohol was the culprit behind this madness anyways. Rainbow Dash and I were just about to walk into the room, and we had decided tell them everything that had happened.

I had already vomited twice, which didn't seem to do too much.

“Of course it was, Silly!” Pinkie Pie replied happily to Twilight.

Anyways, according to Rainbow Dash, we hadn’t done anything very serious and must’ve past out from the alcohol. Well, this was generally an awful experience.

Although, she did mention that we probably would have if I hadn’t passed out from the alcohol.

“Snow is only fifteen years old, and he had a lot of it,” Twilight remembered, “And you heard what Silvermane said she found in her room.”

Well, now seemed like a good of time as any to enter, so I opened the door and walked in first, Rainbow Dash following close behind. I still refused to open my eyes all the way, and so I kept them uncomfortably squinted.

My mane was a complete disaster too, so I probably looked borderline ill. But that’s okay, because Rainbow Dash did too, although I admit she wasn’t nearly as bad as I was.

My coat was matted down as well, and I saw that the bones in my hips and my ribs showed rather noticeably from my sides.

“Good morning, Snow,” Celestia said cautiously. My ears twitched unpleasantly as I walked up to the group of ponies near Celestia’s throne.

I took note of the way the ponies looked that morning. Rarity, Applejack, Rainbow Dash, and I all looked about the same (myself to a heightened degree), and the rest looked the same as usual. Celestia and Luna looked like they had been vigilant all night, which would make sense because of the current instability in the situation with Discord.

Silvermane looked just plain tired, but not like she had a rough night or anything. I replied to Celestia with a groan before sitting down and staring at her.

“We didn’t have sex,” Rainbow Dash said after a brief pause. “I think…”

Welp, that was reassuring. I had never done anything like that before, so I was definitely vouching for anything that did not involve sex with a pony. I wouldn’t have even known what the hell I was doing.

“Yeah, I’m pretty sure nothing too bad happened,” Rainbow Dash said after she thought for another  moment. Celestia seemed slightly more at ease, but wasn’t quite content.

“Silvermane, did you have anything to do with this?” Celestia asked un-menacingly, turning to look down at Silvermane. She looked tired and lost in a daze, but she instantly snapped back to reality as the princess addressed her.

“Absolutely not, your majesty,” she replied instantly with a bow, “They must’ve snuck in after I left for the night shift.”

“Then you are excused,” Celestia granted. Silvermane thanked her with a nod before trotting back to her quarters for rest.

“Have you ever ingested this much alcohol before?” Celestia asked softly with obvious concern.

“No.”

“I’m glad to see that you’re okay, then,” she said. Okay? Do I look okay to you, Celestia?

“Well, better than you could be, I suppose,” she corrected herself with a humorless chuckle, “Can I please talk with Snow and Rainbow Dash for a moment?” she asked.

The rest of the ponies followed Luna out of the throne room and into the hallway.

“Oh, and Twilight,” Celestia called. Twilight turned her head back just before leaving, “You stay too.” Twilight nodded and walked back towards us.

“Yes, princess?” Twilight questioned.

“Do you know anything about this… incident that may help?” she asked as I began fixing my mane.

“All I saw was Rainbow Dash talking with Snow… a lot, and then she said she needed help with something and they both left,” she replied. I turned my head to Rainbow Dash and she looked down and blushed.

“Alright then. Can you wait with the others for a moment?”

Twilight complied and hurriedly left the room, leaving me and Rainbow Dash to stand awkwardly in front of Celestia’s throne.

“Rainbow Dash, you say that you don’t think much happened, and I trust you. I also realize that you may not have been in a right state of mind. As for you,” she began thoughtfully, turning in my direction, “It wasn’t your fault for drinking the punch. None of us knew it contained alcohol, but you are too young for this kind of behavior, and I don’t want to have to deal with you getting some mare pregnant,” she said sternly.

Well, that escalated quickly.

“What!? I-I don’t even-…!” I cried, hurting my own head because of my headache, "I'm fifteen year-..." I suddenly felt the sensation of vomiting again and immediately stopped talking.

“Yes, I understand you didn’t do it on purpose,” Celestia interrupted. At that point, I had no choice but to sit there and take it, “Do not argue, just do as you are told,” she warned irritably.

I shied away from her a little but she continued to glare at me. Eventually she dismissed us, and we walked out of the throne room.

Rainbow Dash joined Applejack and Fluttershy, with whom she talked about something I couldn’t hear. I stood uncomfortably a few yards away, listening to their conversations, until Twilight approached me.

“Are you okay, Snow?” she asked worriedly.

“Yeah, I’m fine. I think I’m gonna go throw up,” I decided, turning and galloping away to the nearest bathroom.

Well, these past few days could have been a little better. I decided not to ponder on it too long and went back up to Celestia’s room to sleep on the purple cushion, as I never found where my room was.

I slept rather peacefully; I dreamt of ponies. It wasn’t long before I woke again though.

I had yet to find a clock that wasn’t on a giant tower in the center of town, so I was stuck with using the sun for reference. Judging by its position, it was about noon.

I felt a little better than I did this morning, considering my migraine had degraded to a minor headache. It was my first time being drunk and I had no idea what was going on. I’m just glad I didn’t manage to make a dumbass of myself one way or another.

From that point on, I decided that I was going to try to act my age. Actually, on second thought, I might want to make my goals reasonable. Maybe I’ll act half my age. No, that’s not good enough. Ten years old, maybe? Yeah, acting ten sounds good. That’s probably a step up, right?

With my newly devised goal of acting two thirds my age, I left Celestia’s room and headed back to the throne room. As I left, however, I met a familiar pony just outside the door.

“Oh, um… hey, Rainbow Dash,” I said softly.

“Hey Snow… the princess said I might find you here,” she replied, anxiously shuffling one of her hooves. “I just wanted to apologize about last night,” she continued.

…

Rainbow Dash just… apologized…?

…

“Ahh, it’s a changeling! Quick, kill it! Kill it with fire!” I hissed, backing away from her with both of my wings flared up in front of me in a defensive stance.

“What, me!? N-no, I’m not a changeling!” she hollered back.

I thought about it for a moment and realized how ridiculous that sounded. And I had to start acting better, so I retracted my wings and stepped up to her again.

“Oh, sorry,” I muttered. She looked half confused, half worried, but she continued anyways.

“Well, anyways, I’m sorry for… possibly taking advantage of you when you had no idea what was happening,” she suddenly spat out in one breath.

“O-okay,” I replied, “You’re, um… forgiven?”

“Great!” she replied mirthfully before hugging me. She didn’t seem to think much of the hug, but when she saw my blush and nervousness, she blushed as well and then cleared her throat.

“Uh, thanks,” she said, “I’ll see you around, I guess.”

“See ya,” I replied as I turned the other way to head back to the throne room.

I’ll admit, that was a little awkward, but at least we talked about it. Otherwise, it would have probably been really weird between us for a really long time. I looked over my shoulder and saw Rainbow Dash staring at me as I left. She didn’t look away and I held eye contact until I was forced to break it. And by ‘forced’, I mean I ran into a wall.

I wasn’t looking where I was walking, and so I ran into the wall at the end of the hallway. At least I hit one of the tapestries, because they were a little softer than the bare wall, but it didn’t help cushion the blow to my self-esteem. Rainbow Dash stifled a giggle and I quickly shuffled down the nearby staircase, eager to get away from the humiliating situation.

Smooth, buddy.

With my ego decimated, I made my way back to the throne room. When I got there, Celestia was busy conversing with who I recognized as the Salt’s once again. I took a spot next to the throne and stared off idly.

“With the value of salt depreciating at this rate, I’m sure you can understand our concern,” one of the salt ponies pleaded.

Meh, boring.

Why couldn’t this trip to Equestria be all fun and games, like a lot of the fan fiction I had read? I’ve never seen anything suggestive or provocative in the television show either, and yet I managed to almost sleep with one of the mane six in less than two weeks after I arrived here. It definitely unnerved me for a little while.

Eventually, back in the real world (Equestria), the two ponies departed and I was left with Celestia.

“Sorry…” I muttered after a few moments of silence. She sighed and looked down at me.

“It wasn’t your fault. Just try not to let it happen again.” I looked back down and nodded, trying to think of something else.

My mind began to wander and I wondered what would happen when and if Discord decided to show himself. With the way it’s been going, I would say he may not show himself at all. Maybe he just wanted to escape and run away.

“Have you ever met Discord, Celestia?” I asked as I looked back up at her. She was still looking at me. She looked a bit surprised, but that quickly faded.

“Well, sure. He was free not long ago.”

“Yeah, I know that. But did you ever talk to him? I mean… have a proper conversation with him,” I clarified, looking away and shrugging.

“I can’t say that I have. Why do you ask?”

“I was just wondering what kind of person, er, draconequus he is.”

“Not a very good one,” she muttered dryly, obviously not very open-minded about it.

“How do you know?” I asked with a little bit more assertiveness than I meant to. This really called her attention, “I mean, he didn’t physically harm anypony last time he escaped. And chocolate rain (~some stay dry, and others feel the pain~) sounds pretty awesome, if you ask me. I know Pinkie Pie enjoyed it.”

“Snow, I promise you, he is bad. Regardless of whether Pinkie Pie enjoyed herself during his reign or not, Discord does not care for the wellbeing of others, and he manipulates ponies only to benefit himself and reach his own selfish desires. When he’s free, the stability of all of Equestria is at risk,” she replied adamantly. I figured she knew better than I did, so I didn’t argue.

“Oh… so do you think he’s actually going to reveal himself? Or is it possible that he’s run away this time?” I asked thoughtfully.

“He’s not the type to run away,” she stated simply. I started to get bored, so I decided I was going to look around for any of the mane six for something to do. I said farewell to Celestia as I walked out the door.

I had no idea where any of the mane six were staying, and I didn’t even know if they were in the castle at the moment.

But I took my chances anyways, and it wasn’t long before I ran into Twilight Sparkle… literally… and she dropped her books.

“Snow!”

“My bad, I’m sorry,” I apologized before I picked her books up for her. There were at least twenty of them, varying in size. After I stacked all of them, she picked them up with her magic and placed them on her back. I don’t know how they stayed balanced, but she seemed pretty good at handling them.

“What’s up?” she asked once everything was situated.

“Not much, I was feeling kind of bored actually. You need help with anything?”

“Well, if you’re bored, I could probably find a use for you…” she mused, “I was on my way to back to my room to do some studying. Learning a few things about Equestria would do you some good.”

“Yay learning,” I replied in a dead tone, earning a chuckle and an eye roll from Twilight. I followed her a short distance back to her room. Twilight’s looked almost identical to Silvermane’s. Standard issue, I guess.

“Can you read off this list to make sure I have all the books I need?” she asked, spreading the books out onto her bed and levitating a small piece of paper in my direction.

“Uh… no,” I replied as I brought one hoof up to grab the paper and hold it in front of my face.

“Very funny, just start at the top and go down the list,” she instructed. Easier said than done, in my case.

“I… umm, er…”

“What are you doing, Snow?” she looked over her shoulder at me after giving me at least ten seconds to start.

“I wasn’t kidding. I can’t read.” Her expression was a mix of bewilderment and concern.

“Sorry,” I muttered as she took the paper back with her magic.

“No, it’s… it’s fine,” she responded. She looked at the list for herself, taking much longer than she would have if she had another pony to help her out.

“Actually, I think I can help you,” she said once she finished going through each book, “I’ll probably have a while to look at these books, so I can teach you a little if you want,” she offered.

“Really? Are you sure?” I asked cautiously.

“Yes, of course. Come here,” she directed as she walked towards her bed. I was used to sitting on everypony’s bed, so at that point, it wasn’t weird anymore. And thus began my first lesson in reading.

This was going to be a piece of cake!

Damn, this was hard to learn.

Apparently, the language was half phonetic, half logographic, which was confusing as hell. That also meant more memorizing symbols than just knowing patterns and sounds. The lesson lasted about two hours, and so far I could write very few words, including my own name. The lesson ended only when there was a knock on the door.

“Get off the books Egghead, you’ll be late for dinner,” a familiar voice called from the hallway.

“Food!” I exclaimed, standing up on the bed and attempting to turn around. I say attempting because I tripped up on my own hoof and fell off of the bed with a crash. I didn’t land on anything too breakable, but it still hurt a lot.

“Whoa! You alright, Twi?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“Yeah, we’re fine. Get up, Snow,” Twilight said with a sigh.

I’m fine by the way. Thanks for asking, Twilight. Oh, and thanks for helping me up too.

I lifted myself up with a groan and opened the door.

“Oh, hey Snow,” Rainbow Dash responded instantly, “I didn’t know you were in there.”

“Yup. I can write my name now,” I said, moving out of the doorway to make room for Twilight.

“Huh?” she said confusedly.

“Twilight’s teaching my how to read,” I clarified, “It’s harder than I thought it would be. It’s different from any language I can already read.”

“What other languages are there?” Rainbow Dash asked confusedly, “Besides, ya know… Equestrian.”

I shot Twilight an inquisitive glance. She yielded no answers, so I turned back to Rainbow Dash.

“Wait, just how big is Equestria?”

“The recent census report told just over four million residents,” Twilight remembered.

“So, everypony is united under one language?”

“Not just one,” Twilight answered, “Equestrian is by far the most prevalent, but some groups of griffins have their own language, as well the crystal ponies, but Princess Cadence is the only one around here that knows any.”

“That means Earth is considerably larger. We have about seven billion people,” I told them.

“Seven million humans? Earth must be pretty big,” Twilight contemplated. Rainbow Dash was just listening for the most part, “How many languages do they have?”

“Frist of all, it’s seven billion, with a B. Actually, never mind. The letter B won’t make any sense to you. But yeah, it’s a seven with nine zeros.” The collective pony jaw was then dropped, “And as for languages, I would guess there’s probably a few thousand, and I can speak two of them.”

Twilight remained silent. She was still gawking over the world ‘billion,’ apparently.

“So… food?”

“Totally,” Rainbow Dash agreed. I followed Rainbow Dash down the hallway towards the dining hall.

“B-but…! Questions!” Twilight yelled as she trailed after us.

“Maybe later, Twilight.”

“Whoa, what’s all this?” I asked confusedly as I looked at the long table.

There was a full, colorful spread of different foods.

None of it was meat, but it looked moderately appetizing, and I was hungry enough to eat a horse. Literally.

I bet Pinkie Pie would taste sweet.

“It’s… food,” Twilight replied.

“This is for us?” I asked, just to be sure.

“No, I led you here so you could stare at it,” Rainbow Dash replied. I responded by walking up to a nearby salad and staring at it from a couple inches away.

Pinkie Pie then burst through the door, followed by Rarity, Fluttershy, Applejack, and Princess Luna.

“Let’s eat, everypony!” Pinkie exclaimed.

Dinner wasn’t too exciting. I wasn’t a big fan of having my entire diet replaced with fruits and vegetables, so I didn’t eat much. After about ten bites, I just kind of shoved a piece of lettuce around with my fork.

“You’re not gonna get any less skinny doing that, Snow,” said Rainbow Dash.

“Rainbow Dash!” Twilight reprimanded, nudging her with a hoof.

"What? It's true," replied Dashie.

“It’s fine, Twilight. I am way too skinny. This isn’t my normal diet,” I responded, looking over the colorful display of vegetables distastefully.

It’s not that I don’t like vegetables, but they’re the only thing I’ve eaten since I got here, and I’m not a fan of veganism.

“What do ya mean?” Applejack asked incredulously, “Everything you could want is right here!”

“Well, I’m just used to a little more meat, I guess.”

A silence quickly engulfed the room, and the only sound was a few ponies setting their utensils onto their plates with a clang, only to look up and stare at me. Oh yeah… I forgot. Meat wasn’t exactly ‘popular’ in Equestria.

“Oh, right…” I said sheepishly.

“Well, you d-do have sharp teeth,” Fluttershy remembered. Oh no, was I making Fluttershy uncomfortable?

“On second thought, I’m fine. Sorry about that,” I apologized softly, quickly eating the piece of lettuce that was already stabbed by my fork.

“It’s alright,” Twilight replied timidly, “We shouldn’t judge other ponies because of their cannibalistic tendencies.”

What

“Cannibalistic!?” I cried, “Where’d you get that idea from!?”

“I... I thought-!”

“No! Humans don’t eat other humans! Well, most of them don’t… Anyways, the only meat I eat is that of non-sentient creatures,” I explained.

“W-what are some non-sentient creatures on earth?” Fluttershy asked worriedly.

“Actually, ponies are non-sentient on my planet.”

“You eat ponies!?” Rainbow Dash cried. Her and Twilight stood up out of their chairs and backed away from me.

Okay brain, way to pick the worst possible example.

“I don’t eat ponies!” I yelled back, “That was just an example! No one eats ponies! Well, most people don’t, I guess…” I continued right before I was interrupted by something much more important.

Celestia came quickly through the door with a couple of guards.

“Discord’s in Baltimare,” she announced urgently.

“Hehe… Baltimare. Where’s that, in mare-yland?”

Oh, I crack me up…

“We need to get you all and the elements there as quickly as possible,” she declared.

This was a good of time as any to go Discord hunting, I suppose. Well, it could have been before the cannibalism accusations. Actually, this was an awful time. Oh, well…

I had successfully been able to explain the eating habits of humans to the ponies in a way that didn’t freak them out or scare them.

It’s actually much harder than it sounds.

It involved a lot of lying. I felt bad, but I think I’d feel worse if I hadn’t.

Anyways, it’s been only a few minutes riding in the chariot. Celestia explained what the plan was to everypony. The first step was to get to Baltimare, of course. Unfortunately, it was about two hours away via sleigh chariot thing, and this was the fastest mode of transportation in Equestria, according to Twilight. Apparently trains were very slow here. So we had a little less than two hours left until we reached our destination.

In my chariot were the mane six, the two princesses, and Silvermane. That’s a pretty good group, if you ask me. Anyways, the next step in the plan was to find Discord.

The plan seemed rather simple, but with the infinite amount of unknown variables, we couldn’t plan much else. I assumed that after we had found him, we would just blast him with a rainbow or something, like the elements did last time.

I sat near the edge of the chariot, looking out the side as the wind stung my eyes and my blonde mane was blown backwards. It really didn’t seem like we were going that fast. Maybe fifty or sixty miles per hour at best, but then again, I didn’t really expect the Equestrians to have airplanes going six hundred miles per hour either.

I probably laid there for a good twenty minutes, with my head rested on my forelegs like a dog, pondering anything that happened to jump into my mind, until I heard somepony approach from the side.

I turned my head a little and saw Rainbow Dash lying down beside me out of the corner of my eye. She said nothing but sighed and stared off into the distance, like I had been a few minutes ago. I turned my head back before she spoke.

“Hey.”

“Hey, Dashie,” I replied. Rainbow Dash exhaled mirthfully.

“Are you, uh, nervous at all?” she asked hopefully.

“Not really,” I answered. She looked a bit deflated, “Are you?”

“N-no!” she immediately defended, “I… I mean, maybe a little,” she admitted in a hushed tone.

“Don’t worry about it. You turned him into a statue once, and you can do it again,” I assured her.

“What are we whispering about?” Pinkie Pie suddenly chimed in, bounding up to us from behind. Rainbow Dash and I both turned our heads to look at her. Her exclamation had also gathered the attention of everypony else in the chariot.

“Nothing Pinkie, go away,” Rainbow Dash replied calmly. There was an awkward pause for a moment while Pinkie Pie stared at us.

“Okie Dokie Lokie!” she replied before trotting away.

Welp, that was awkward and pointless.

“Discord gave us a free shot last time, but he probably won’t be so careless this time,” Rainbow Dash whispered back to me.

Why was she telling me about this?

“You’ll find a way,” I told her.

I would help too, of course… unless I found out that Discord wasn't all that bad and he just wanted to be left alone. Only then would I be a little hesitant to turn him back into stone.

“I’ll probably be helping too,” I reminded her.

“Good,” she replied weakly.

There was another silence between us as I stared off into the distance again. After a little while, Rainbow Dash shifted a little closer to me. What the hell is she doing? I guess I was a little distressed as well because I didn’t do anything to counter it.

I hadn’t even realized that I had dozed off, but I woke with a start about an hour and a half later with a pink demon yelling at me.

“Wake up Sleepyheads, we’re almost in Baltimare!” it exclaimed mere inches from my face

.

My eyes instantly snapped open, assuming the world was coming to an end at the hands of Discord.

Oh, my mistake, it was just Pinkie Pie. My sense of urgency faded and I relaxed again, shifting into a more comfortable position.

It was only when I shifted that I felt Rainbow Dash leaning up against me, tiredly murmuring. I blushed and quickly stood up.

“Aww, you’re so cute when you blush!” Pinkie Pie exclaimed, eliciting a chuckle from Princess Celestia, who was sitting nearby. She then stood up and made her way over to us.

“I think he’s had enough teasing for one day,” she said. Bless her she saved me.

Unexpectedly, however, we suddenly passed through a bubble of some sort. Specifically, we passed through a ‘membrane,’ as Twilight calls it now, and into a ‘chaos bubble’.

The city of Baltimare looked no different from the outside, but as soon as we passed through the membrane, everything basically flipped upside down. The sky was pink with the mass of cotton candy clouds that rained chocolate milk onto the ground, which was composed of rolling hills of a ceramic floor with alternating colored tiles. There was no evident pattern, of course. It was all random and chaotic.

“We’ll be at the heart of the city in about five minutes,” Celestia declared, successfully drawing everypony’s attention, “We’ll need to split up once we get there. We’ll go in groups of two: Applejack and Luna, Rainbow Dash and Snow, Twilight and Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie and Rarity, and Silvermane will be with me.” Celestia listed off the groups, pointing at each pair, respectively.

“Actually, Snow, you switch with Silvermane. That leaves Silvermane with Rainbow Dash, and then Snow and myself as the last group. Does everypony understand?”

There was a unanimous “Yes, Princess,” from each of the mane six. I trailed after them with the last syllable of ‘princess,’ hoping to blend in. It didn’t work too well with my voice being the only masculine one.

“We’ll branch off into five directions, since there are five groups, and search for Discord. The first group to find him should get the attention of everypony else. With the groups I’ve placed you in, you should have no trouble doing so.” she continued.

The chariot was parked under a tree to shield us from the raining chocolate milk. It was useless, however, because the tree proceeded to stand up and walk away a few moments after we slid under its canopy. All the more reason to get moving, I suppose.

“Each of you needs to take your own element and get going,” she instructed as she opened the case to reveal the elements of harmony.

I made a mental note to ask Celestia later why the elements are in the shape of jewelry, and not something a bit more practical.

I stood next to Celestia as she made sure everypony else had departed before we went on our way. She ordered the two guards pulling the chariot to remain with it and protect it while we were gone.

“Where exactly are we going?” I asked as we headed out towards the city.

The chocolate milk soaked through and darkened both my and Celestia’s white coats.

“We’ll just search through the city until us or a different group manages to find Discord.”

“Sounds good,” I said as we carefully made our way over the hills of slippery tile until we reached what appeared to be the inner city. It looked very similar to a normal city in the United States, minus the graffiti, grime, and other general uncleanliness.

Pathways randomly shifted and broke, cracking and crumbling with each movement. This made it harder to navigate between the buildings, especially when going up a staircase means there’s a fifty percent chance of ending up at a lower elevation than where you began.

The entropy seemed to increase as we went on; although, much of the changing of the ground below us was avoided with our wings. I almost crashed into Celestia a couple times, and she managed to catch me once or twice.

“I think it’s getting even worse,” I called to her over the noise of the splattering milk and the shifting earth.

“You’re right,” she replied, not taking the time to look back over her shoulder.

Suddenly, the ground beneath us stabilized and ceased moving. The chocolate milk rain also cleared, but this normalcy was only occurring in about a fifteen foot radius of us, as if we were in a small haven from the chaos.

“It’s good to see you again, Princess,” a rasping voice called from no place in particular. “And I see you’ve brought our friend, the human.”

I scooted closer to Celestia at the mention of me.

“Discord! Show yourself!” Celestia demanded. Discord let out a pleasant chuckle in return.

“As you wish…” he sinisterly agreed before appearing just about ten feet in front of us.

Celestia’s horn lit up brightly and shot a beam of golden light high into the air. It crackled like thunder as it collided with the pink clouds, sending a very noticeable shockwave of color across the sky, which continued to linger.

I visibly flinched as I noticed Discord. His appearance was identical to that in my dream, with no detail left out. Although, he was wearing a strange silver necklace, with an amulet in the shape of an eight pointed star dangling from it. He noticed me flinch and laughed heartily as he looked down at me.

“Remember me, Snow? Isn’t that what you’re calling yourself now, Samuel? How creative,” he smiled.

At least I know now that he had something to do with my presence in Equestria. I’m not sure whether that’s a bad thing or not.

“Yeah, I do remember! And your little puppet prophecy thing was wrong!” I declared, taking a few bold steps towards him.

“Oh, but my little human, you have not waited long enough. It will happen in due time,” he replied maniacally.

I caught a glimpse of an indigo alicorn out of the corner of my eye and turned my attention towards it.  I remained silent as I watched other ponies make their way to the small safe area. First was Applejack, being carried through the sky by Luna, and then came Twilight with Fluttershy, and soon the rest came as well. Discord watched amusedly as we gathered in a tight group, a few of us (everypony but me) glaring daggers at him. I was a bit indecisive at the moment.

“You ready to show him the power of friendship one last time, girls?” Twilight asked with a determined stare. Discord never dropped his humorous air, apparently amused by all of this. The mane six fashioned some sort of formation, with Twilight in the front, and they began to collectively glow. Honestly, it was kind of weird.

Twilight’s eyes glowing white looked creepier than it did friendshipfull. Celestia and Luna looked a bit anxious, like they were worried of the outcome, and Silvermane’s expression reflected my own thoughts.

Discord yawned and looked generally bored while Twilight and the other elements shot a massive rainbow of energy into the sky. It ran high up into the air before making a U-turn and heading straight for Discord. It looked like it was about to demolish him completely, but when it was only a few feet from him, his chaos necklace shined a bright, blood-red color.

The rainbow suddenly broke apart into six monochromatic beams, each of which silently dissipated upon contact with the ground.

Twilight was the first to look up at the completely unaffected Discord, her mouth agape. The others reacted similarly and Discord added his maniacal laughter into the mix.

“You see this?” he asked with a knowing smile, lifting the amulet with his talon, “I call it the disharmony necklace. It’ll break apart any type of friendship or harmony you throw at me. It repulses it like the opposite end of a magnet.”

My only response was to stand there silently, waiting for discord to make the next move, because apparently, we didn’t have a backup plan. Way to be prepared, Celestia.

“Anyways, now that you’ve cooled off a little bit, I have an offer for you. Specifically for Snow,” he began, turning everypony’s attention towards me.

“How about you come over to my side, and enjoy this lovely chaos I’ve created?” he offered.

“Why would I do that?” I asked nonchalantly, knowing that he had to have prepared to offer me something if he expected me to actually join him.

“I glad you asked, my little human! I’ve got plenty to offer,” he said with a devilish smile, “How about a way back to Earth?”

I took a brief pause after he said this, staring straight back into his demented eyes. I flicked my eyes around for a moment and saw the very worried glances of the ponies around me. Oh Lord, this was difficult. Well, no matter what I chose, I was going to need some proof.

“Prove it,” I replied sternly, trying to stay as expressionless as possible.

“Hmm… here we go,” he said as he held out the palm of his lion’s paw. A hologram-like, three-dimensional image was projected out of it and onto the empty space above. The image was of earth, apparently seen from outer space.

“This is Earth, is it not?” he asked. I immediately recognized the continents and bodies of water on the spherical form.

“It is,” I replied quietly, intently staring at the image. It suddenly changed into an image of my own home from the front.

“And this is your house, correct?”

“It… it is,” I confirmed, marveling at the familiar sight.

“Also, you seem a little malnourished,” he observed. “How does a nice steak dinner sound?”

Discord pulled a large, white plate with a huge ribeye steak right in the center of it. I don’t know how, but I could smell it clearly from a fairly long distance. The other ponies were obviously repulsed by both the sight and the smell of the meat.

My mouth watered rampantly and I felt the sharp points of my teeth with my tongue, making the offer that much more tempting.

I tried to regain a little control and stopped to look around at the ponies surrounding me. They looked to be in a mixture of mortification and apprehension.

“Is he gonna take the offer?” I heard Pinkie Pie mutter before being shushed by Twilight.

“No,” I said, looking up at Discord again. “I… I can’t.”

“What?” Discord asked disbelievingly, suddenly losing his playful attitude, “Come on, you want it, do you not?”

“I do, very badly,” I replied.

“So, what’s you decision…?” he asked looking down at me. He looked like he was ready to obliterate me if I said something wrong.

“I don’t accept,” I repeated hoarsely, earning a couple smiles and sighs of relief from the ponies.

“What do you mean!?” he demanded angrily, “I reasoned that an average human would accept this offer without a second thought! What’s your game, human?” he seethed, approaching me quickly. The ponies parted to give him a clear path (thanks a lot you guys) and I had no choice but to stand my ground.

“Well, I guess I’m not particularly average,” I replied sheepishly.

“No… you’re not…” he agreed solemnly, his face now mere inches from my own. He scrutinized me for several second, scaring the living hell out of me, before he backed away a little.

“Bah!” he cried out, “You’re worthless!” Discord swung at me with his arm and I reared up, putting my wings up in defense.

The initial contact didn’t hurt at all, but his blow had enough force to knock me back a few feet, and my head and back collided with a cement wall, left over from a ruined building.

I heard a few feminine voices call out my name and I forced my eyes open a little. Everything looked hazy, but I soon saw Discord disappear into nothingness and the chaos began around us again.

I felt myself being slung over somepony’s shoulder like a ragdoll after I closed my eyes again. A few moments later, I was dragged into unconsciousness.