Love and Loss (WIP Title)

by Darkmale76

Rating: teen
Tags: Slice of Life, Sex, Twilight Sparkle, Main 6, Gore, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Sad, Princess Luna, Spike, Tragedy, Princess Celestia
Length: 9008

Twilight may be immortal, but her friends are not. When her friends pass on, she must continue on without them.

Twilight may be immortal, but her friends are not.
As the years slowly pass by she notices that her friends are becoming older while she stays relatively young.
And when her friends pass on, she must continue on without them.
This is the story of Twilight.
The story of how she recovered from the loss of her friends.

Published 2013-12-08 04:50:02 UTC
Last updated 2014-01-01 09:37:41 UTC

Chapter One - Rainbows Passing

Twilight was sitting on the floor of her room in the Canterlot Castle, staring at nothing in particular.

She could hear hoofsteps coming towards her door and then somepony knocking on her door.

"Um, Twilight? Are you in there?" The voice asked in a quiet voice.

Twilight ignored it and continued to stare at the floor.

"Uh.. If you're in there, I'll just leave your food outside the door if you want it later", the voice said.

Twilight didn't waste any energy by talking, she didn't do anything these days.

Outside Twilights' chambers, Luna stands wiping tears from her eyes while using her magic to clear away a weeks worth of uneaten food.

*What a waste of perfectly good food*, Luna thought. *We could have given this to the ponies who needed it.*

She then carefully places the new food next to the door, knowing full well that it would only be cleared away by her next week during her weekly visit.

She then retreated to her own quarters in the next corridor. When she arrived she lay face down on her bed, with her head in her pillow, and started crying.

She hated to see her partner like this but Twilight had been like this since the week after their honeymoon ended and there was nothing that Luna could do to snap her out of it.

Back in her room Twilight sat, still in the same position as before, but there was one difference.

There was a single tear rolling down her cheek making its way down to her chin before dropping to the floor.

--

Some 75 years previous

Twilight stood with Fluttershy, Applejack, Rarity, Pinkie Pie and Spike around their friends hospital bed.

Rainbow Dash had been admitted to the Canterlot Hospital after her accident at the Wonderbolts show she was performing at.

As soon as the others had heard about Rainbows crash they had hurried to Canterlot to comfort her as she recovered.

When they arrived they all greeted Rainbow by kissing her on her only undamaged cheek, everyone except Applejack, who had lightly pecked Rainbow on the lips.

They had been married for a few years now. They got married one week before Rainbow had been accepted into the Wonderbolts.

She had been so overjoyed when she got the letter that she had accidentally kissed the mail-mare, Derpy Hooves.

Applejack had looked at her sternly but had smiled afterwards because she knew that getting into that elite group of pegasi was what her mare-friend had always wanted.

A few days later Pinkie Pie had thrown a party for her to celebrate her joining the Wonderbolts.

The mood around the bed was a solemn one, even Pinkie stood still.

They all had tears in their eyes while they looked down on their friends body.

Applejack was the first to look away, as she couldn't stand the silence any longer.

She needed some fresh air and the others followed her allowing the doctors and nurses to access the room.

Once outside Applejack sat down on a park bench looking away from the hospital.

The others sat around her and took turns hugging and comforting her.

Author's Note

Unpublished chapters can be read using the password "MoreBooks" (with out the quotation marks)

Chapter Two - Spike and Rarity's Announcement

Twilight wakes up to find herself in her bed.

Having no memory of walking over to and climbing in she assumed that Celestia had been in her room again trying to comfort her.

She gets up and walks over to the only spot on the floor not covered in dust and sits down in the same position as the day before.

Everyday had the same routine. Wake up, walk to the dust-free spot on the floor, sit down and stare at the floor, remember those painful memories and finally fall asleep.

Once the memories started they didn't stop until she was asleep, and even then some memories continued until she woke up.

Somepony knocks on the door and says something about breakfast.

It sounds like Spike so she assumes that its a Tuesday. Spike always visits on a Tuesday, which is his one day off from serving the princess as her emissary.

Hearing Spike's voice reminds Twilight of when Spike and Rarity started dating.

--

Twilight was still up at midnight after one of Pinkies ridiculous parties, pacing around her room.

She was pacing because Spike had disappeared and she hadn't been able to find him.

Then he walked in the front door of the tree library.

Twilight rushed at him and yelled, "Where the hay have you been?!"

Spike smiled at her and puts a finger clumsily to his lips.

"Shh", Spike said. "Its a secret. Rarity said not tell Twilight that we're dating. She's organizing a party to tell everypony. You won't tell her will you?"

Twilight looked at him and replied, "I wont tell Twilight".

"Pinkie Promise?" Spike asked just to make sure.

"I Pinkie Promise. Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye," Twilight said crossing her heart and mimed sticking a cupcake in her eye.

Spike nodded at her and walked haphazardly up the stairs to his bed, clearly drunk and needing to sleep it off.

Twilight smiled and shook her head as she watched him almost fall off of the stairs three times.

She closed the door and the windows, made sure all the lights were turned off and while heading back to bed opened the utility closet and grabbed out a bucket and placed it near Spikes bed for him to throw up in.

Only then did she finally relax knowing that Spike and Rarity would be an adorable couple.

Two days later Rarity knocked on Twilights door and said that she would be throwing a party later that day over at Sugar Cube Corner.

Twilight knew that Rarity was planning a party, but she didn't expect it to be this soon.

Rarity's parties usually consisted of months of prior planning...

And then it hit her.

Spike had seemed a lot happier the last couple of months and Rarity had started branching out to making other garments other than just dresses.

Twilight finally realized that Spike and Rarity had been secretly dating and nopony had noticed.

She was happy for the two of them, but slightly annoyed that Spike hadn't told her that he was dating Rarity.

At the party Pinkie Pie hosted, Spike and Rarity announced that they were now an 'item'.

Everyone looked at them in surprise, everyone except Twilight as Spike had inadvertently told her two days before.

There was a moment of stunned silence until Twilight walked over to Spike and kissed him on the forehead.

"I'm glad that you two are happy, but why didn't you tell us earlier?" Twilight asked smiling at Rarity then looking at Spike and raising an eyebrow.

"Well..." Spike started.

"Spike wanted it to be a big occasion and I agreed," Rarity finished smiling at the others and hugging Spike.

Everyone then rushed over and hugged the two love birds.

The party continued long into the night only ending when the punch became "Spike'd".

--

Twilight was crying again, not tears of sadness but tears of joy.

That was one of the few memories she could look back on and not be depressed afterwards.

She stood up and walked to the door, opening it slightly to see if there was anyone looking then pulling in the tray containing the evening meal.

It was a bit cold, as it had been sitting there for 20 minutes, but she still ate all of it.

She had forgotten how hungry she could get after not doing anything for weeks and months on end.

And if her calculations were correct this would be the first meal she had eaten of her own will in over a month.

Once she had fully eaten the meal she slowly walked over to the door again, carefully looking out to check that the area was clear then carefully placing the tray back on top of the precariously balanced pile.

Later that evening when Twilight had finally fallen asleep after climbing into her bed, Celestia walked to Twilight's room carrying a tray of food with her magic.

When she got to the door and was about to go in when she noticed the empty tray.

She smiled and thought to herself, *She must have had the memory about Spike and Rarity again.*

Celestia magicked away the tray and opened the door and walked over to Twilights' sleeping form.

She sat on the side of the bed looking down on her sister in-law and brushing her mane away from her face.

Then she leaned down and kissed Twilight gently on the forehead, so as not to wake her, and whispered "Rest well, my faithful student, for tomorrow the anguish begins again..."

Chapter Three - Applejacks' Accident

Twilight awoke and was immediately plunged into the first depressing memory of the day.

--

Twilight woke with a groan. She felt that the world had changed, that something was somehow wrong.

She heard somepony knocking on the front door, so she stuck her head out the window to see who it was.

"Hello?" Twilight called down to the yellow pegasus that was knocking on her door.

"Come quickly", said the almost breathless Fluttershy. "Somethings happened."

Twilight ran down the stairs to follow the sun-coloured pegasus.

When she reached Fluttershy, Twilight tried to coax what had happened out of her, but to no avail.

Fluttershy was leading her to Sweet Apple Acres, but before they arrived they turned off into the Everfree forest.

They had almost reached the old Royal Castle and as Twilight was about to cross the bridge Fluttershy stopped her.

Fluttershy then pointed down into the crevice at an orange form surrounded by a large, red patch of dirt.

There was also a pink pony standing beside a distraught white pony.

Twilight took all this in and within a matter of seconds had jumped off the cliff and landed a small distance away from the red puddle that was slowly growing.

"Oh no! Applejack!" Twilight exclaimed.

"C'mon Applejack. You can still get up, right? All you have to do is move your rump." Pinkie was clearly distressed by what she saw before her. "C'mon, please. Do it for your Aunty Pinkie?"

"Um, Pinkie? I think shes gon..." was all Twilight could say before Pinkie shoved a hoof in her mouth to stop her.

"No Twilight. Can't you see that shes just trying to trick us". Pinkies eye twitched manically as she said this.

Only then did she take a closer look at Pinkie Pie and was astonished to see that her mane had lost all of its previous poofiness.

This surprised her more than seeing one of her friends lying dead in a pool of her own blood.

*The only other time this had happened was when Pinkie went insane... oh*, Twilight thought.

By that time the paramedics had arrived, waved down into the canyon by Fluttershy.

They had run over to Applejacks body and picked it up and carefully placed it on a stretcher.

Upon picking up the stretcher they legged it back to the hospital as fast as they could, but everypony knew that it was too late to save her.

She had lost too much blood too quickly and her spine was most likely broken, so even if she survived it was unlikely that she would ever walk again.

The others decided to start the long trek back to the Hospital, which was located as far away from the Everfree as possible, while still being within reach of Ponyville.

When everyone arrived at the Hospital they were surprised to see most of Ponyville standing outside.

Everyone gave them sad little smiles as they passed by on their way into the Hospital.

Most of the ponies gathered that were gathered around had tears in their eyes, knowing that the towns most liked pony was most likely dead or dying.

At that moment Big Mac and Applebloom ran towards the group of ponies about to enter the front doors.

Applebloom looked at them with big, round, sad eyes and asked "Is mah big sis gonna be alright?"

Twilight tried to comfort her by saying "We don't know, we're just about to find out."

Big mac looked at his little sister and said "Why don't ya go off an' play with yer little filly friends."

Applebloom gave him a questioning glare but did as he asked.

Big Mac turned to the others and said "we need to talk. Preferably somewhere quiet" he said looking around at the townsfolk gathered around.

Twilight lead the way inside and into an unoccupied room.

As the others followed she cast a series of spells to stop people from eavesdropping or entering the room while the conversation was taking place.

Turning around Twilight nodded at Big Mac, signaling him that he could start speaking without any of them being overheard.

"She left a note", Big Mac said in a pained voice.

Being a tad slow today Pinkie asked, "Who left a note?"

"Applejack", Big Mac replied. "She must've written it before she left t' jump off that goddang cliff."

He passed the note to Twilight who read it outloud to the others assembled in the room.

Dearest friends. You know that I love all of you equally, but I can't stand it no more.

The one pony that I fell in love with is no longer here.

I can't wake in the morning and not feel like I'm missing a part of who I am, or was.

"I'm sorry, I just can't read anymore", Twilight said choking on her words slightly as tears started to roll down her cheeks.

"I'll take over reading then." Fluttershy surprised everyone by taking the note and continuing to read from where Twilight had stopped.

I'm sorry to write what I'm about to, but it has to be said.

I cannot continue living if Rainbow is not here to share the days with me.

Goodbye. I will always love you.

Applejack

By this time everypony was either crying, or just about to start. Even the hardened Big Mac was sniffling slightly.

They all jumped when they heard on knock on the door.

Twilight walked over and opened it to reveal a doctor.

Outside in the corridor the doctor told them the bad news, that Applejack had died on the way to the hospital, even though everyone knew that she had been dead before the medics had been called.

The only thing to do now was to inform the rest of Ponyville about this sad fact.

Big Mac went outside to find Applebloom and bring her to the front doors of the hospital.

Twilight and the others walked slowly out the doors.

She waited for Big Mac to walk back towards them with Applebloom.

"We have just been told that Applejack died on the way to the Hospital. She had fallen off a steep, but not particularly high, cliff while trying to herd some of the cows back to the farm." Twilight said. *A white lie is easier to take than the truth* she thought to herself.

Everypony that was gathered around cried softly at this and those that were couples hugged each other.

"Today is a sad day. We have all lost a friend and a very hard working member of this community. Everyone will need time to grieve her passing, so I will arrange for a one-off public holiday to be made so that all of Ponyville can mourn Applejack, but I will need time and the Princess's blessing so until then we need to continue our lives as normally as possible.

"Big Mac and the other Apples will need to arrange a funeral and I will help in creating any plans to commemorate Applejacks life"

Big Mac nodded at Twilight in acknowledgement, and to say that she should continue.

"We, as a town, are closer to each other than any other town in Equestria. If we can come through this with only a few scrapes and bruises we will be able to overcome anything. We must remain strong," Twilight was saying as tears we streaming down her face. "It's what Applejack would've wanted," Twilight finished, choking out the last few words of her speech.

--

Twilight woke with a start as she heard the one voice that she did NOT want to hear today.

"Wakey wakey, my sleepy little pony! I think its time we re-decorated, don't you? This room is sooo boooring and dull," Discord was saying as he walked around the nearly empty room.

Twilight moaned in disgust and face-planted into the bed.

Chapter Four - The Dream Land

"Discord! Get down from there!" Twilight heard the princess yell.

"Why should I? I get treated like a common dog by you and your precious sister. All I hear is 'Good boy, Discord' and 'Discord, could you please put the vase back where you found it' and 'Discord, give me back my tail'. Well I, for one, am sick of it. I shan't continue being your pet anymore!" Discord raged as the chandelier hung onto him for its life.

Princess Celestia peeked out the corner of her eye at her student only to fin that she had still not moved, or even smiled at what was transpiring in her living quarters.

"I'm sorry, Discord. I thought it would work this time..." Celestia pondered thoughtfully.

"Oh well. I played my part, now its time for you to play yours." Discord said looking at Celestia with a smirk.

"Fine," Celestia sighed. "Let us go to my quarters so as to not disturb Twilight.."

"Allow me, Princess," Discord replied and with a snap of his fingers they both vanished.

At the same time, Twilight felt another memory surfacing.

Bracing herself for what she knew was to come, she embraced the darkness once again.

--

74 years previous

One week after Applejacks death, all of Ponyville was gathered in a large, church-like tent.

There was a resonably sized chestnut-coloured wood coffin.

Inside it lay a very attractive mare.

Applejack had been cleaned and dressed in a simple, but elegant, dress which was designed by Rarity and given to the funeral parlour for this very occasion.

"You look so very pretty, Applejack dear," Rarity was telling the body in the coffin. "Too bad I couldnt get you to wear something like this when you were still with us."

And with that she broke into tears and walked away to sit down next to Spike, who cuddled her lovingly.

Next to pay her respects to her 'bestest friend in all of Equestria' was a very disturbing looking Pinkie.

"Hey Applejack. Hows it going?" Pinkie asked, her left eye twitching every now and then. "I've been having the most wonderful time. I ate three whole chocolate cakes yesterday."

She paused then as if listening to Applejack talking to her.

"Yes yes. I know i shouldn't have eaten three," Pinkie replied to the coffin, "but the Cakes make them soooo tasty."

She finished by smiling manically at the body before moving away and sitting in the seat next to Rarity, who moved her chair away from Pinkie as she slowly turned her manic smile on her.

"Oh, Applejack. If you could see what would've happened, would you still have gone through with it?" Fluttershy whispered quietly, more to herself than the pony in the box.

During the ceremony everypony had cried at least once, everyone except Pinkie who wore her manic grin through the entire ceremony. But when the coffin closed and the pall-bearers called Pinkie cracked.

She cried and tore at her mane before finally running out of the tent, almost knocking the coffin to the ground in her haste.

Fluttershy looked at her friends, not knowing what had just happened, and gave them a quizical look. They all shrugged to say they had no idea either.

--

Back in her room, Twilight was sprawled on the floor with a pillow under her head.

Tears were falling rapidly from her cheek onto the pillow.

The air reverberated with her sobbing, due to the high marble walls and concave roof.

She could feel the next memory trying to burst through into her eyes, but she shut them stopping the memory from arriving.

Lying there on the cold marble floor as it drained the warmth from her body, she shuddered violently.

--

Her eyes opened and she found herself in her loft room in the Ponyville library.

Standing on shaky legs she walks over to the window and looks over a desolate Ponyville.

Knowing this is not the town she left behind when she moved to Canterlot she leaves the room to explore...

Only to end up in a crumbling building.

Looking around she recognises the statues and realises that she is standing in the Canterlot Ancient Archives.

She picks up a book with her magic only to have it crumble into dust.

Twilight sits down and continues to do the only thing she does. Cry.

Not hearing the hoofsteps slowly approaching her she is startled when a dark blue wing encompasses her.

"Lu.. Luna.. Wha... What happene..." Twilight starts.

"Shh," Luna replies, "This isn't real. All of this is a dream."

"But the pain and agony of loss feels so real." Twilight starts to cry again.

"That's because your subconcious is feeding off the loss of your friends. What you see around you is only what your mind is feeling. Pain, Loss, Heartache and, most of all, the lack of happiness."

"But how do you know all this?" Twilight asked.

"Don't you remember? I married you," Luna replied kissing Twilight on the cheek. "Marriage is more than just a piece of paper to the royal family. It allows us to share the thoughts and feelings of our partners."

"Then how come I can't sense your feelings?" Twilight asked insightfully.

"Ah. But you can," Luna extended her hoof to help Twilight up, "But your own emotions are hiding it. Take my hoof and I will show you."

As Twilight grasps Luna's forehoof a blinding white light appears and swallows the two of them.

A few seconds later they arrive in what appears to be a dining hall.

There is a long table down the middle of the room, with comfy seats every few paces, adorned with fancy gold candle holders every 3 or so chairs to allow the table to fully lit.

Twilight was about to ask what they were doing here when Luna put a hoof to her mouth and pointed to the door.

Twilight turns her attention to the door as it swings open and she walks in accompanied by Luna.

Behind them is a whole host of hungry wedding guests with an ecstatic, but visivly older, Pinkie Pie leading the procession.

Everypony sits in their designated seats, with the happy couple sitting towards the middle.

"This is our wedding day," Twilight remarks.

"Indeed it is," Luna replies.

"Why are we here? Weren't you going to show me how you feel?" Twilight asked, confused at why they were re-living their wedding feast.

"Twilight, I am showing you how i feel. Can't you see the smiles on our faces? That is how i feel when i'm around you," Luna began. "But lately the feeling has been different.

"If you could take my hoof again, I will show you."

Another bright flash of light and they end up in a halway cluttered by trays of uneaten food.

A different Luna appears around the corner carrying a tray of fresh food.

Politely knocking on the door she calls out, "Um, Twilight? Are you in there?"

There was no reply from the other side of the door.

"Uh.. If you're in there, I'll just leave your food outside the door if you want it later", the other Luna continued.

Still no answer from the room, or its inhabitant.

Luna stood there and cleared away the trays with a wisp of magic while wiping the tears from her eyes.

"Wait," Twilight says. "This was Monday. The Monday just been."

"No Twilight. This isn't the Monday just been. This is EVERY Monday. Its always the same. Nothing ever changes," Luna cries. "I come by every Monday to see if there is any change, anything at all. Even if it is that you are sitting closer or further away from the door. But its always the same."

Luna breaks down and starts crying, while the memory-Luna places the tray down and walks away.

Twilight is stunned into silence. She didn't know that Luna felt this way.

When Twilight tried to comfort her partner, Luna shrugged the wing off her back and grabbed Twilight by the shoulders and stared into her eyes.

"Twilight, if you are trying to cheer me up please remember that we are in the Dream World. The only way to truly make me happy is for you to face your fears and work through your problems. You must accept the past before you can embrace the future. There is no changing what has happened, but you alter what you have become. Before you can make me happy you must first be happy in yourself."

With this Luna lept into the air and spread her wings.

The world around changed then, the ceiling and walls melting away to reveal a full moon and starry sky.

"I allow you to remember this dream, in the hopes that it will help you change," Luna boomed as she flapped her mighty wings, flying closer to the Moon with every flap.

"Wake now, my sweet. I shall see you soon."

And with that the Dream World was sucked into the moon leaving only Twilight behind in its absence.

She closed her eyes on the Dream...

And woke lying spread-eagle on the marble floor of her Royal Quarters.

Author's Note

I've finally finished this Chapter. YAY!
Onto the next one!
Feel free to leave a comment and tell me what i need to fix.

Chapter Five - The Farewell Party

Twilight groaned and sat up, wishing she hadn't fallen asleep in that position.

As she stood and stretched the sore muscles she felt something stirring in her memory.

She remembered doing this last week.

*But how?* she thought to herself. *How could I have done this last week? What is wrong with me that I must do this every week?*

Sitting down again, she burst into an uncontrollable fit of sobbing, with tears streaming down her cheeks.

Once she had calmed down a bit she allowed herself to be swept into the Land of Remembrance, where the next memory lay waiting.

--

After Applejacks funeral was over Fluttershy went looking for Pinkie. After 30 minutes of searching she found Pinkie shoving cupcakes into her mouth and following them up with a copious amount of chocolate milk.

Fluttershy walked over and sat beside her distraught friend.

Pinkie looked at her and said, "I can't take it. How can i be happy when two of my friends are dead?"

Fluttershy stretched a wing around Pinkie, whose sobbing was dosturbing the other customers in Sugar Cube Corner.

"There there. Noone can be happy all the time. Even the Element of Laughter needs to cry once in a while." Fluttershy pushed the carton of chocolate milk and basket of muffins away from Pinkie.

Pinkie was still crying so Fluttershy decided to bring out the big guns.

"Um, Pinkie?" Pinkie looked up at her friend while tears streamed down her cheeks. "How about we throw a party? You know, to celerbrate Applejack and Rainbow's lives?" Fluttershy said while wiping the tears from Pinkie's face.

Pinkie looked like she was about to start crying again so Fluttershy hugged her again with her wing while whispering, "Please don't start crying again Pinkie. I'm sorry if I've upset you."

Fluttershy had closed her eyes and was about to start crying herself when she felt something brush against her lips.

When she opened her eyes she saw Pinkie's eyes in front of her own.

Startled, she pulled back away from the kiss.

She stared wide eyed at her friend, opening and closing her mouth like a goldfish.

Pinkie Pie blushed and said quietly, "I would love that."

This snapped Fluttershy out of her stunned silence. "What?

"I would love to throw a party," Pinkie replied shyly.

Fluttershy wrapped her forelegs around Pinkie and then, quite unexpectedly, planted a kiss on he friends lips.

Pinkie looked shocked, but slowly melted into the kiss.

When the others came looking for Pinkie they found the two sitting togther, Pinkie resting a hoof on one of Fluttershy's, feeding each other cupcakes.

The two ponies before them, who were clearly oblivious to any pony around, had personalities that were diammetrically opposite (or so Twilight had tried to explain to Spike later that evening). They were like the two poles of magnet.

Pinkie was bubbly and wanted to be a part of every party and Fluttershy was timid and didnt like attention being drawn to herself.

"Don't they realize that they are out in public?" Rarity whispered loudly to Twilight when Pinkie and Fluttershy began nuzzling each other.

"Calm down, Rarity," Twilight whispered back. "You and Spike were like that when we went out to dinner as a group."

And when the two lovebirds started kissing each other Spike, being the polite and awkward dragon that he was, looked the other way, heat radiating from his cheeks.

"Aww. Is my little Spikey-wikey embarrassed by a little kissing?" Rarity teased.

"No," Spike replied in a matter-of-fact manner, "I'm just giving them the privacy they deserve, is all."

"Um, Spike? You do realize we are in a bar don't you?" Twilight asked.

"Oh. Yeah. Right." Spike fumbled around in his pocket (how does he have pockets? Hes a fucking dragon for ponies sake! He doesn't wear any fucking clothes! Anhoo, continuing on) for a few bits to order a round of drinks.

After the drinks were carried back to the table where Pinkie Pie, Fluttershy, Twilight and Rarity were sitting Pinkie raised a toast to the memories of the Elements of Honesty and Loyalty.

"May your presence on this earth never be forgotten, nor the value of your work diminished. Cheers." Pinkie saluted with her cider in hoof and they all clinked their glasses together with a chorus of "cheers".

"Pinkie?"

"Yeah Twilight?"

"Why did you run off like that at the funeral? Me and the others were worried about you," Twilight asked.

"Oh yeah, that. I'm really sorry about running away, its just... I couldn't stand it anymore," Pinkie replied. "I know I'm the Element of Laughter, but how can i laugh when two of my friends cant laugh with me? Its just not fair!"

At this Pinkie almost starts crying again, but Fluttershy wraps a wing around her and rests her head on Pinkie's shoulder.

"And then i tried to hide my true emotions behind a wall of sugary goodness-"

"-Meaning she was trying to drown herself in cupcakes and chocolate milk," Fluttershy added with a polite smile.

"Yeah. And then Fluttershy came along and stopped me. She comforted me and told me that everything was going to be fine and that even I need to cry sometimes." And with that Pinkie gave Fluttershy a quick peck on the lips.

"I also told her that every life needs to be celebrated, so we have decided to throw a farewell party for Rainbow and Applejack," Fluttershy finished, wrapping a hoof around Pinkie's shoulder and brought her in for a full kiss.

Everyone around the table, apart from Spike who blushed and averted his gaze, smiled at the new couple.

A week later the Ponyville Library was packed with people celebrating the lives of Applejack and Rainbow Dash, but most of them were just there for the alcoholic beverages to numb the pain.

"Ugh. Why couldn't we have booked the Town Hall for this? We would have had more, gah, room," Twilight asked no one in particular as she made her way through the crowded room towards the kitchen.

"Because, silly, they needed it for a Pinkie meet." Pinkie rolled her eyes at her friends ignorance.

"A what?!"

"A Pinkie meet. Its like a normal meeting but only for Pinkie's. Speaking of meetings I believe I have one in the town hall to be attending." Pinkie quickly bounced towards the door.

"Oh no you don't," Twilight muttered.

Pinkie felt something slip around her hooves and then the world tipped on its side.

When she looked at her legs she saw a taut rope. Her first thought was of Applejack and she almost jumped out of her skin trying to get up to see her now un-dead friend.

But then Twilight trotted over with the other end of the slowly slackening rope clenched between her teeth, Pinkie's unfounded hopes were dashed.

Twilight spat out the rope and looked sternly at Pinkie.

"Now, this was yours and Fluttershy's idea so its only fair to the rest of us that you stay as well, even if it means you go insane again. And also, next time you want to get out of something don't make an excuse, just say you don't want to do it."

"But the Pinkie meet isn't an excu..." Twilight cut her off with a hoof in her mouth.

"Just get up there and make a toast," Twilight ordered.

"Okie Dokie Lokie." Pinkie walked over to the stairs and stood a couple of steps above the lobby floor. She then pulled out a kazoo and drew in a deep breath before bringing the bizarre instrument to her muzzle. Quickly expelling her lungs into the kazoo she drew the crowd to attention.

"I'm not one for speeches, but today I will make an exception,"

Pinkie began. "Applejack and Rainbow Dash, as many of you know, were two of my closest friends as well as being two of the Elements of Harmony. They were Honesty and Loyalty, and while I may be the Element of Laughter it makes me sad to think that I will never hear them speak again. But we must continue on, because that is what they would have wanted.

"We live on with the memories of them woven into our very souls, and one day we can tell our children and our grandchildren that we were friends with Honesty and Loyalty." Pinkie hesitated in her speech just long enough to pick up a new glass of cider. "Here's to Applejack and Rainbow Dash. May your legacy live on until the end of time itself.

"Cheers!" Pinkie finished and everypony raised their glasses to the ceiling before bringing them back down to their mouths and taking a long drink of the cool liquid.

--

Twilight peered out the window into the dark sky.

She was shivering, but not from the cold.

Outside, the leaves of the trees swayed slightly in the sheltered gardens of the mountain side city while Luna's moon peered down upon Equestria, as if searching for any dangers that might be lurking.

Twilight walked over to her bed and lay on it, thinking of what Luna had said to her.

*Before i can make Luna happy I must first be happy myself. But how? How can I make myself happy when all my friends are dead?* "How?" Twilight broke into tears again as she felt a gentle hoof caressing her mane.

She looked up to see her Mentor standing there smiling down at her.

"Why is this happening to me? Why am i constantly reliving these memories?" Twilight cried softly into her bed. "Please. Please help me."

"I am sorry, Twilight, but this is something you must face on your own."

And with that Princess Celestia quietly left the room, leaving Twilight with her thoughts.

Chapter Six - Heart Failure

Twilight stood on the edge of a steep cliff.

Below her, lying broken on the ground, were her ponyville friends.

As she looked down she thought to herself, *I can't stand it anymore.*

Without thinking she stepped off the cliff and closed her eyes.

--

Only to wake up in her Canterlot suite.

She looked around for something to do to get her mind off of the dream, but the room was very utilitarian.

The only things that she could do were sleep, pace, sit on a sofa or write something.

Twilight did not want to go back to sleep for fear of more horrific dreams manifesting themselves. She also did not want to pace or sit on a sofa as those would allow her time to think, so she picked up a well used quill and started writing.

A detailed history of Equestria by Twilight Sparkle

Section One - Canterlot

Chapter One - The founding.

The history of the famous Unicorn City came to her easily as she sat there, and word flew off the quill onto the waiting paper.

She continued writing for several hours, but after only completing one chapter she soon gave up.

Relaxing back in her chair she allowed her eyes to slowly close on the world around her.

Leaning back she felt as if she was sinking into the leather of the chair

--

Twilight sat at the dinner table in the home she grew up in.

Sitting around the table, making idle conversation, was her family.

Her brother and father were chatting about the next weeks Thunderbowl match and arguing over who was the better team in the next game.

"The Canterlot Cruisers are sure to win. They have Storm Mane as the quarterback," Twilights father was saying.

"Na-uh. The Crystal Empire Crushers will win by a land slide. Stronghoof is playing again. He just recovered from a wing injury and is ready to kick some flank!" Shining Armour countered.

"Wanna bet?"

"Name it."

"Boys, boys. Not at the dinner table," Twilight's mother scolded. "You know its rude to argue."

They both looked at her and apologized.

Twilight and her mother exchanged a quick glance and then burst out laughing.

Twilight couldn't contain her laughter. "Ha! You should see the looks on your faces!"

The males looked at each other and burst out laughing.

Eventually they all settled down and waited while Twilight and her mother went and fetched the food.

As they were bringing the food out they heard a thud and Shining call to them, "Mum, Twily! Dad's collapsed!"

Twilight and her mother dropped the plates of food and ran to her father's side.

Her mother looked at Shining, "Call the medics."

When Shining didn't move she shouted, "NOW!"

Shining ran out of the room to fetch some paramedics.

"Twilight. Help me roll him onto his side. We need to get him in the recovery position." She looked at Twilight who was frozen, staring at her father lying on the floor, slowly turning red in the face.

"I can't roll him over myself. He's too heavy," her mother said, looking at Twilight longingly.

A purple aura surrounds the figure on the floor and gently rolls the pony onto his side, with his hind legs curled up and his forelegs stetched out at a roughly 90 degree angle to the rest of his body.

As she stood there, Twilight looked down at her fathers reddening face and began to panic as his breathing became labored.

His breathing was erratic and she was scared that every time he stopped breathing he wouldn't start again.

Shining Armour came back into the house with a worried look on his face.

"The paramedics are on their way, but the dispatcher says we need to roll him onto his back and perform CPR. Two breaths for every 100 compression's, whatever the hell that means."

"Twilight, help me roll him onto his back," Twilight hears her mother say. She quickly re-positions her father using magic and moves the chairs and table out of the way to clear a path for the medics.

While Twilight does this, her mother has moved over to her father and is quickly, but steadily pumping her hoofs into his chest near his heart, in order to keep it beating.

She counts quietly and when she reaches one hundred she reaches down and pinches her husbands nose and opens his mouth. She moves her mouth down to her husbands and blows air into his lungs. She does this once more before beginning the compression's again.

They hear a wheezing noise coming from the pony on the ground and they realize that he is fighting to keep his breathing going, but his face is still slowly going red.

"Is he going to be okay? What happened? Why did this happen right before Hearts Warming Eve?" Shining Armour ask, tears running down the sides of his face.

Twilight just stands there, staring blankly into space as she holds her fathers legs apart with her purple magic aura.

The medics arrive shortly after in an ambulance and they quickly hurry inside and set up their fancy equipment that will help them to stabilize the patient.

Twilight moves out into the hallway to give the medics some room.

Her body is buzzing for no apparent reason.

Feeling the buzzing in her legs, her torso, her head and her rump she quickly lies down and breathes deeply, trying to get rid of the strange feeling.

Shining is also out in the hallway, but he has a totally different react than Twilight.

He is sobbing into his mothers shoulder while she comforts him, patting him on the back, calming him down with soothing words.

Twilight stares at the roof and feels tears start to form in her eyes. She wants to brush them away, but she doesn't have the energy. All of the energy she has left is channeled into keeping her breathing steady.

When she feels the buzzing has decreased enough she quietly stands and walks to her room.

It is only a short walk down the hall before she opens the door and flops down onto her freshly made bed.

Trying not to cry only makes matters worse and she cries even more.

Once her crying has subsided a little she moves to her desk and opens it.

Inside she finds some paper, a pair of scissors and a quill.

Levitating two of the items she walks over to her bed and plops herself down beside it, so her back is supported by the mattresses.

She quickly locates and teleports her bin next to her and opens the lid.

Taking the paper in her hoof, she cuts it into strips and quickly snips at it to create tiny segments, which fall into the bin.

She does this for a while before her mother walks in and stands next to her and places a hoof on Twilight's shoulder.

"We have to be strong, sweetheart," her mother says as Twilight cries into her forelegs.

Twilight slowly stopped her sobbing and looked down at her hooves. "I'm trying, Mum. I'm really trying." Her sobbing starts again, quieter than before.

"I know, sweetie. We all are," her mother replied, smoothing Twilight's mane with her hoof.

--

The chair beneath her creaked as she leaned forwards over the desk.

Sitting on it was a letter, which she was sure she hadn't written.

On the front, in embellished lettering was her name.

She quickly tore it open to see what it contained.

When she turned it upside down a letter and a fabric web in the shape of a circle fell out.

Opening the letter she quietly read the contents.

My Dearest Twilight

I see you are having nightmares. Enclosed is a Dream Catcher.

It will catch the bad dreams and allow you to enjoy the good ones, but only if it is hung in a window.

Please do this as I don't want you to fear the sweet embrace of sleep.

It would be a shame if I could not see you happy, even it is only in your dreams.

Your Faithful Partner

Princess Luna

P.S I hope to see you again tonight.

Twilight folded the letter and placed it in the top draw of the old Oak desk.

Walking over to the widow closest to her bed, she carried the Dream Catcher in a purple aura.

Reaching with her magic, she placed a pin in the string attached to the top of the Dream Catcher and rammed it into the top of the window frame, so that the dream catcher was hanging down in front of the window.

After this she climbed back into bed, because the sun was setting in the distance and the moon was slowly rising, just showing its bright face over the horizon.

Closing her eyes she hoped that the Dream Catcher would work, because if it didn't she didn't know what dreams were going to manifest themselves.

Author's Note

This chapter is dedicated to my father who suffered a heart attack on the day before Christmas.
He is recovering in Hospital.

Merry Christmas Everypony.

Chapter Seven - The Waiting Game

Twilight sits up in her bed and looks out the window to see the glorious sun slowly rising into the sky.

She raises her forelegs above her head with a yawn and then proceeds to wiping the sleep out of her eyes.

Standing slowly, she walks over to the door and opens it.

Walking down familiar corridors she makes her way down to the kitchens to get some breakfast.

As she walks through the more populated areas of the castle, the ponies bow to her but she ignores them, just wanting to get some food into her empty stomach.

When she arrived in the kitchen she asked for some oaty pancakes drizzled in maple syrup and a glass of OJ.

She went and sat down in a secluded corner of the busy kitchen and waited for her food.

A kindly waiter brought it over to her momentarily and smiling he said, "I hope you enjoy your meal, Twilight."

Twilight was shocked that he hadn't called her "Princess", or "Princess Twilight", but she quickly recovered her manners and thanked him politely before carrying the tray out into an empty area of the provided eating area.

There were few ponies around at this time of morning as the guards were changing shift (that usually happened just before the sun was raised but there had been a mix up with the roster so the night patrol had worked overtime while the heads of the Royal Guard sorted out the problem) and everypony was only just waking up and getting ready for work.

A few of the passing ponies stopped to greet or bow to Twilight and she waved back to most of them, between bites.

To Twilight's delight the pancakes were warm and cooked just how she liked them: a little doughy, just enough to make it spring back slowly when you prodded it, but not too doughy that it tastes like yeast.

It was a perfect batch of pancakes and she could clearly taste all of the ingredients that went into creating the flavors.

There was a blast of toasted oats combined with a pinch of salt, a spoon of sugar and a dash of milk, all combined with the maple syrup made it a feast for her taste buds.

She paused in her eating to take a sip of her Orange Juice.

It tasted freshly squeezed, because it was, and had a small amount of orange pulp, just enough to set her tongue on edge without making her gag on it. (When I have too much pulp in my OJ it feels like I'm drinking bits of soggy biscuit, you know, when you dunk your biscuit into your tea/coffee/hot chocolate and you drop it and then forget about it? Yeah, like that. *Shudders*. Disgusting.)

Placing the cup back down on the table, she continued eating her pancake for a while before she realized that she'd finished it a few minutes ago.

Calling one of the serving staff over, she politely asked if she could have another two oat pancakes with a bottle of maple syrup. He nodded and whipped back into the kitchen to tell the chef to prepare some more for her.

While sitting at the table waiting for her order she stared at her half drunken orange juice.

Feeling drawn in by the swirling pattern the pulp was making as it brushed the inside of the glass she blinked and was transported back into another of her memories.

--

Twilight and her family were sitting in the Canterlot Hospital A&E department waiting to be let in to see her father.

A nurse walked out from one of the doors labeled "Staff Only" and called out for the family of Nightlight.

Twilight stood and followed the nurse with her family in tow.

They walked down a few corridors before reaching a waiting room where they could wait to here news about Twi's father.

The nurse that had escorted them to the waiting room explained to them that everything was going to be fine, and that they had done a good job keeping their father breathing until the medics had gotten there.

It was explained to them that Nightlight would need to have an operation done on his heart to clear what they expected to be a clot, or a piece of plaque that had gotten itself lodged into one of the major arteries and had restricted the blood flow, cutting off the supply of oxygen to his brain.

The nurse then said that they had a doctor in the hospital that specialized in this area and that he was one of the top doctors in that area in Equestria.

After she had explained everything she asked them if they wanted anything to drink, they declined and so the nurse told them that she'd be back later to escort them up to the next area and then went off to do some jobs.

While the family was waiting their uncle, on Twilights mothers side, showed up.

He tried to assure them that they'd done everything that they could have and that Nightlight would be fine.

The others just smiled and nodded meekly and then Twilight's mother recounted the story of what had happened.

And then, minutes later, one of Nightlight's sisters showed up so Twilight's mother retold the story for a second time.

The entire time this was going on Twilight was sipping on a cold water which she had poured herself from the machine in the room, and staring at her hooves and out the window, doing anything to distract her overactive imagination from thinking of all of the different ways this visit could end.

Not too long after this the nurse returned and spoke to them again.

"I'm afraid I can't leave my post to show you to the next area, but if you'd be so kind as to follow these two lovely fillies they'll take you up to the Cardiac Intensive Care Unit." (CICU for short)

Twilight looked at the two mares, who had tinsel wrapped loosely around their necks, and slowly stood and followed them.

They led them down some more corridors to an elevator, which they used to go up one floor, before they arrived at their destination.

"You can wait in here until you're allowed to visit him," one of the nurses said.

"He'll be up shortly, he's just currently in the operating theater," the other one followed up.

And with a farewell and a wave they headed back to the lifts.

Sitting in the waiting room already were an older mare and an older colt, who were talking to each other like they knew each other, and a younger colt who was listening to the mare talking about how her partner had had a heart attack while mowing the lawns.

"The grass is nice now," she was saying, "but now we've got one fucked bush.

Her and the younger colt burst into laughter, while the older colt just sat there smiling idly with a look on his face that said "I've heard this story before, it doesn't get any funnier the more you tell it".

Twilight and her family sat down, trying not to disturb the other occupants.

Her uncle commented that now it was just a waiting game.

And so the waiting began.

--

"Um, hello? Miss Sparkle?" Twilight heard a voice say.

"Huh? What?" she replied, confused as to where she was.

"Miss Sparkle, your pancakes have arrived," the serving pony said, indicating to the pancakes in front of her.

"Oh, right," Twilight answered, grinning sheepishly. "Thank you."

The pony bowed and strode quickly away from the table.

Twilight took a bite of a pancake.

It was cold now.

"I could send it back and offend the chef, or i could just leave it here on the table," she thought to herself, but then she decided to use a discreet heating spell on her food and the maple syrup.

A very faint aura surrounded her horn, barely noticeable to even the trained eye, and she let the magic flow through her.

As she watched steam- no, water vapor, she corrected herself- rose off the pancakes telling her that she could end the spell.

She quickly severed her ties with the ebb and flow of the magic around her, and picked up the maple syrup jug with her hooves, feeling the warmth seeping into her hands.

She poured the syrup over the rest of her breakfast and guzzled it all down, to the shock of the more refined in the area, eager to get out of this public place and back to the safety of her own room.

Author's Note

Happy New Years, Readers!