Every #*($ing Day: Another Comment Driven Story

by Just Another Writer

Rating: teen
Tags: Comedy, Random, Adventure, Human
Length: 977

Every day. Every single day she just sits there and gives me this stupid look on her face. What do I do about her?

Hi, I'm Vincent, and I have a question for you.

Have you ever seen something that made you first think "huh, that's different," and then soon afterward you're thinking "THIS IS DRIVING ME UP A WALL" in no time flat? Yeah. This is what's happening to me.

To make a long story short, in a beginning that may have well been fresh from a My Little Dashie spin-off, I ended up with Rainbow Dash. Sounds fun, right?

Not really. She keeps doing this stupid face at me. I hate it. So I'm turning to you guys for help.

A/N: This is a hilariously terrible self-insert story driven by comments. I make no guarantees to the humor.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2013-12-10 07:31:01 UTC

The Ride Begins

Hi, you've read the description by now, so I'll just summarize my life with Rainbow Dash up to this point.

It all started when I was driving back to my apartment after Med School. I was planning on becoming a surgeon, specifically. I was cruising in my lousy hand-me-down beater SUV to pick up some Subway on the way home, because I have to get my meatball sub on. I parked outside, and saw a cardboard box. I know what you're thinking. "Vincent, why did you open a random cardboard box that could've contained poisonous, murderous snakes?" You can't prove I opened it, and snakes are cool.

Anyway, I opened the box...wait, guess I did just provide proof that I opened it. Oh well. I opened the box and inside was a puppy with a teal coat and a rainbow mane. Except it wasn't a puppy, it was a filly Rainbow Dash. Must be Tuesday, I thought to myself, considering this happened frequently. Okay, it didn't. I just wanted to pretend it did.

So I picked up the filly Rainbow Dash and walked into Subway, just acting like I always carry a filly Rainbow Dash with me.

"Hi, how are you?" I nodded to a passerby as I entered Subway. They ran screaming. Note to self, do NOT show off characters from cartoons that you happen to stumble by in the real world.

I walked up to the counter. "Hi, one foot-long meatball marinara with Parmesan sprinkled on. Make it a meal!"

Terrible idea because there was a brony in the room who noticed Rainbow Dash.

"OH MY GOD, IS THAT RAINBOW DASH?!" I could feel him spitting on me as he talked and adjusted his trilby.

"Maybe," I said, trying to pretend that I didn't hate his kind.

"BROHOOF!" He screamed as he offered a fist.

"No thank you," I said, as I retrieved my Lay's and Powerade.

I swear I could've heard crying as I walked out, sandwich, drink, chips, and filly in tow. That was when I noticed she had teeth. Interesting. More interesting was her face. The face I'd come to hate. The face she did when Daring Do mentioned proposals or something in the Daring Don't episode. It's the cover art for this, go look at it.

Looked at it? Excellent. Let's continue.

So she did that face and it made me smile a tad. It was funny at first and I didn't know better, get off my back. As I drove home, I could see she kept doing that face. I was getting a bit unsettled at this point. However, for some reason, I didn't throw her into the road. Probably because she can fly at supersonic speed and kick my teeth in. Probably because  I didn't feel like it. Most likely the latter.

With that said, I got home and ate my sandwich while Rainbow Dash continued to make that face at me. Oh god, she's still doing it as I type. It's driving me up a wall, I swear to Christ. Whoops, getting off-topic.

After eating my sandwich, chips, and having my drink, while Rainbow stared at me with puppy-dog eyes while still doing the face(let's not stress how, for even I don't know), I decided to play some video games. By that, I mean tell people that my favorite video games are better than theirs.

Once I got banned for shitposting, I really didn't feel like doing anything else so I actually played video games. I was playing Metal Gear Rising when I noticed Rainbow Dash sitting next to me, doing that face. At that point I missed a quick time event and decided I really didn't want to do that boss fight again. I know, I know, they put checkpoints close to quick time events, but I was delirious.

I didn't feel like doing anything else, so I brushed my teeth and went to bed. I felt something snuggle up against me.

"This is like one of my japanese animes!" I said out loud. She turned her head and that fucking face was still there, as I began to loathe it.

I went to sleep and dreamed of Twilight Sparkle and I playing Dota 2. We kicked ass. "GG, no re," I said to dream scrubs as I annihilated them.

After a few matches, I woke up to be greeted by that face. I screamed like a little girl at the surprise. However, I realized that face wouldn't kill me so I decided to get over it.

I rolled out of bed and dressed up, brushed my teeth, and went off to Med School. Med School is boring so I'll spare you the details.

After Med School and picking up a McChicken, I appreciated the irony in that statement as I drove home. When I arrived home, guess what face awaited me. The fucking Rainbow Dash face.

I decided to go on Steam and ask some of my 'friends' about what to do. The majority of responses involved suggesting drinking bleach and making crystals out of some poisonous chemical. I can't be arsed to remember, so no, I'm not telling you how to do it. Then I tried Skype. No one cared, unsurprisingly.

Therefore, I have come to FiMFiction, a site where I am at least somewhat respected. That's been the story to this point. Yes, it's been less than 24 hours since it started. No, I'm not a weenie, I'm just...okay, fine. I AM a weenie. However, I didn't come here to take abuse from people I don't even know. I came to ask what I should do.

To sum up, every fucking day. Every single fucking day this little faggot just sits there with this stupid look on her face. What should I do about her? Suggestions? Leave them in the comments.