La Merby TwinkleshineChaptersThe Open SeaThe Good Ship Honeycrisp, Part 1The Good Ship Honeycrisp, Part 2Welcome to Port JonagoldThe Open SeaTwilight's mouth tasted like salt. She smacked her lips together, musing upon the strange grainy texture on her tongue, and rolled over. The cold smack of the water against her bare coat made her open her eyes. Her head was underwater for a moment. Twilight saw the raft above her and stretched up a hoof towards it, kicking her hind legs furiously. Once her face broke the surface, she took a series of deep, gulping breaths—more out of shock than anything else. She turned her head to the left and saw the open sea stretched out before her. To the right was the same. She scrambled aboard the raft, her heart pounding. Twilight’s mind raced through the advice Princess Celestia had given her on the chance that she should ever find herself completely lost and alone. Even though it was advice for a young filly, Twilight thought that it could be applied in this situation. “Fuh-first off,” she said aloud, teeth chattering from the icy water seeping into her mane, coat, and tail, “calm down.” This was easier said than done. Every breath she took ended in her shuddering. Every heartbeat was abrupt. Even running her hoof through her mane only made her feel the slimy seaweed that laid in the depths of the water she had just climbed out of that would tangle around her legs and keep her at the bottom of the ocean forever. However, in the middle of these morbid thoughts came an idea that snapped her out of her rapid decline into panicking. “Of course!” she shouted as her head snapped up, nearly tipping over the raft with her sudden movement. “The teleportation spell!” Twilight closed her eyes and concentrated on where she wanted to go. She thought of the library—the dusty smell of books, the feel of the magically warped tree against her hooves, the sound of wind rustling through the branches above, the taste of Spike’s homemade lemon cookies, the look of raindrops on the windows after a storm. Then, focusing her energy on all of these things, her horn began to glow a bright pink. She felt herself floating off the raft. After a few seconds, she opened her eyes. The glow was blinding, and Twilight felt her horn throbbing violently—the pain emanating from it spreading through her forehead and down to her neck. Her mouth hung open, and she began to scream. For a moment, she saw Spike. His mouth was moving, and his eyes were turned to a pony that she couldn’t see. “Spike!” she screeched, reaching out a hoof to touch him. He turned towards her, and she could read his lips. “Twilight?” Twilight’s horn felt like it was splitting in two. She screamed Spike’s name one last time before cutting off the power behind the spell. The glow flickered and sputtered, sparks coming out of her horn and burning into her face. Twilight howled, and the light from her horn stopped suddenly—the pain in her skull beginning to ebb. Her entire body twitched, collapsing hard onto the raft. It trembled and shook before dumping her into the sea. Underwater once again, Twilight didn’t have the energy to kick herself up to the surface again. Instead, she closed her eyes and let herself sink. Twilight felt something rough move across her face, and she kicked her hind legs in response. Somepony made a tutting noise with their tongue like a primary school teacher as she did so. “That won’t help you none, dear,” said a scratchy but feminine voice. “Just calm down and let ‘ol Applejack do her work.” Something in her brain stirred upon hearing that name, but it took a moment for it to click into place. Applejack… Applejack! Twilight tried to raise her head up and open her eyes. However, both tasks at once seemed too complex for her to manage. Instead of doing either, she retched—the strong stench of salt and bile now in her nostrils. She noticed that something liquid was coming out of her ears. Twilight let out a groan, the only sound her throat let her make. “See? I told ya, didn’t I?” said the voice again. The roughness that moved across her face was now brushing at her belly, and she realized that there was a dull pain coming from there. Twilight opened her eyes slightly and twitched her hoof towards the area. “Ah, ah, ah,” said the voice. “No touching until I’ve done my work now, ya hear?” Twilight let out another groan that was supposed to be a noise of agreement. She could barely see the blurry shape of another pony above her, but it was enough to realize that it wasn’t her Applejack. She’s not wearing the right hat, for one , she thought. And she’s too hunched over. I thought Rarity nagged bad posture out of her already. She decided to attempt words again, if only to ask this pony to stop rubbing at her sore spot. “Hu-Who” —Twilight retched again, but this time nothing came up. —“ah-are you?” The pony above her let out a harsh bark that she supposed could be considered laughter amongst hardy sailors and the like. “I’m Granny Applejack,” she said. “It’s nice to know that yer not as dead as I thought. Hate cleaning up corpses. Who’s this I’m talkin’ to?” “Twi-Twilight Sparkle.” There was a heavy pause before the pony spoke again. It was like the silence before a teacher gave their student a failing grade. Twilight wondered inanely if she was back in Magic Kindergarten. “You must really be out of it,” muttered the pony. “Sea water must’ve done somethin’ to yer brain.” Something about this made Twilight want to chuckle before she realized that opening her mouth again would likely result in more seawater spewing out of her stomach. Instead, she tugged her lips up into a weak smile. “Don’t be wasting yer energy on doing silly things like that. You’ve got yerself a bad case of the chills—hypothermia if yer the fancy type—and you’ll be needing all that fight to get yerself warm again. Plus, and don’t take this the wrong way now, yer kinda all scummy and nasty from yer little dip in the big blue. Scumminess leads to infection and infection leads to pus coming out of ya and pus coming out of ya leads to a lot of bad things. Believe you me.” It was pretty hard to follow the pony as she rambled on, but Twilight got the gist of it—no smiling and you’re sick. Lovely. Now if only she said that in fewer words for those of us with our brains leaking out of our ears, she thought. She felt the pony shift a little above her, and the rough thing began to slide down her back. “Where… am… I…?” asked Twilight slowly. “Now that’s a question worth askin’, m’dear,” said Granny Applejack. “Yer on the good ship Honeycrisp, about eight nautical miles from Port Jonagold.” “Ship?” That would explain part of the rocking motion that she felt, though she suspected most of it was coming from her brain short-circuiting. “Yes, a ship. Where else didja think we were?” Twilight bit back a snarky remark and instead remained silent. It was becoming clear that she was far away from any place that she knew. The only thing that would help her now would be to find out just how far. “D-Do you know of a pluh-place called ‘Ponyville’?” “Yes, sirree,” said Granny Applejack. “But that’s a rough and tumble place for a nice unicorn like you to be askin’ about. Unless I rescued a digger. Are you a digger, dear?” Twilight thought this question over for a second but decided to tell the truth in the end. “No.” Granny Applejack gave a satisfied harrumph and said, “Thank goodness. It’s not like I need another in the family, after all.” There was a scuffling up above, and somepony shouted, “Granny! Quit yer tending and get up here!” “Once I get up there, I’m gonna teach ya some respect!” Twilight let out a moan of pain. All of the shouting wasn’t exactly helping her head, which had just started to throb with renewed vigor. “Now look whatcha done!” shouted Granny Applejack. Twilight moaned again. “Oh! Sorry, dear.” “Just come up here already, ya old sea hag!” Between the bursts of pressure being put on her brain, Twilight realized that the voice from above was most certainly male and most certainly annoying. “Fine! I’m a’comin’! Butcha won’t like it when I do!” “Whatever, Granny!” The rubbing along her spine stopped, and Twilight felt the air shift as she was tucked into a scratchy but warm blanket. “Just get some sleep now, dear. You’ll feel better after a quick nap,” whispered Granny Applejack before she left. “I’ll be back in two jiffs.” Twilight let out a noise that she hoped sounded agreeable and watched Granny Applejack’s shadowy figure walk away from her. Within what felt like a few seconds to her, she was fast asleep—dreaming of places she had left behind. Spike had woken up that morning to the sound of a powerful spell tearing its way through the library. Ponyville being Ponyville and Twilight being Twilight, he wasn’t exactly surprised. Still, that didn’t mean that he wasn’t concerned. Wiping the sleep from his eyes, Spike ran downstairs to Twilight’s study. ‘Twilight! Are you alright?!” There was no answer, and a cold chill ran down his spine. He ran a little faster and continued to shout out her name. “Twilight! Twilight!” Once he got to Twilight’s study, Spike stopped dead in his tracks. The once meticulously stacked papers were scattered across the floor. The books from the shelves, carefully arranged by author and title, laid strewn around the room. There was a scorch mark by the desk that looked suspiciously pony-shaped. “Twilight?” croaked Spike one last time. Whatever answer he was expecting never came. Author's Note Thank you for giving this story a chance! This is my first work of fiction ever, so I would really appreciate some feedback. Try to catch the blatant references to a fairly obscure game from a not-so obscure series! The Good Ship Honeycrisp, Part 1Twilight woke up to somepony moving her blanket away from her shivering form. She tried to grab it back, but her limbs wouldn’t respond. “How ya feelin’, Miss?” asked a light and airy voice that she didn’t recognize. “Blanket… please,” was the best she could reply. There was a shuffling sound, and she was tucked into another warm cover. Twilight snuggled her head into it the best she could and sighed. “Is that better?” the voice asked. She nodded her head slightly. “That’s good,” said the voice with an audible smile. “Uh… that’s right! I haven’t told ya my name yet, have I?” There was a brief pause, as if the pony was expecting her to respond. Twilight remained still and silent. “Well, my name’s Lady. Granny Applejack told me aboutcha, but she didn’t mention yer name…” “Twilight… Sparkle…” There was another pause, this time followed by a nervous giggling. “Granny told me that about you. I just didn’t think you’d, ya know, stick to that story once ya really came to.” Twilight would have rolled her eyes if she had the energy to do so. What was it about her name that was so strange? A compelling question, surely, but one that would have to wait until she was out of death’s grip. She was able to open her eyes a little more than the last time she tried, and Twilight could see the blurry shape of a hulking pony sitting beside her. She felt like she should’ve recoiled in shock but found that she had neither the energy nor the will to do so. “Sleep… I want… sleep…” “I’ve gotta make sure ya eat something first,” said Lady. “Granny Applejack was very… um… insistent about that.” Twilight groaned. Her stomach was still full of sea water and it sloshed around painfully. She wasn’t sure if she could eat, much less want to. Something hard tried to shove its way through her lips, and it took Twilight longer than she would like to admit to realize that it was Lady doing it. She opened her mouth to moan in protest, but that just made the other pony’s job easier. “It’s just a cracker,” said Lady. “It’s the only thing that we think ya can keep down right now. Just chew and swallow.” The cracker tasted like sawdust and as it mixed in with the still lingering salt in her mouth, Twilight wanted to gag. She passed it over from her tongue to her teeth, crunching down on it and feeling it being pulverized into a stomach-churning paste. She swallowed the nasty mixture of cracker, salvia, salt, and bile and hoped she wouldn’t have to feel it come back up. “Good job, Miss.” Twilight half expected a doggy treat or a pat on the head. Instead of voicing this particular piece of snarkiness, she gave the blurred mass of a pony a twitch of her lips. “That’s right,” said Lady. “Ya gotta keep yer spirits up! We’ll be in Port Jonagold soon, just you see. I’m sure you’ll be feeling better by then!” She’s certainly one for optimism, isn’t she? There was an uncomfortable silence between them for a moment or two before Twilight felt the air shift and a gentle hoof move under her head. She groaned as her neck protested. It wasn’t until she felt liquid against her lips that she understood. Truth be told, Twilight was thirsty. Something to do with all that seawater, she thought. All that salt can’t be good for me. She opened her mouth and let it flow across her tongue, but the taste of it made her spit it right back out. Twilight desperately wanted to retch again but stopped just short of doing so, coughing and sputtering instead. “Yeah, Granny’s apple cider takes a little while to get used to,” said Lady, “but it’s the only drink that’ll stay fresh on the ship so…” Twilight just nodded and coughed violently, still trying to get the rest of the apple cider out of her throat. Her entire body was shaking and shivering and twitching under the blanket. A disturbingly clear thought parted the fog that had settled on her mind. I’m going to die, aren’t I? “Whaddaya mean Twilight’s missing?!” shouted Rainbow Dash at the top of her lungs. The rest of the ponies assembled winced. “Like I was saying,” said Spike, taking his claws out of his ears, “Nopony’s seen Twilight since last night, and that includes me.” “That doesn’t mean she’s missing,” said Rarity. “She could’ve been called to Canterlot or gone for a walk in the Everfree to see Zecora or—” “Wouldn't she have left a note for Spike though, Rarity?” interrupted Applejack, pointing her hoof towards the baby dragon. “Twilight’s a real responsible pony.” “Yeah!” exclaimed Pinkie Pie, bouncing a little. “I mean, remember when she went out to lunch last week and sent us all notes telling us the address and which table she was sitting at in case we needed her?” “Uh-huh,” said Fluttershy. “She certainly wouldn’t just leave any of us without an explanation.” “That’s what’s really weird about this whole thing,” said Spike, nodding. “This morning, there was this really powerful teleportation spell and—” “Did Twilight cast it?” asked Rainbow Dash, waving a hoof. Spike drew his claws over his face in exasperation. “Like I was saying, I checked its magical signature using one of the doodads from Twilight’s study, and it matched up exactly with hers—except a lot stronger.” “So what does that mean?” asked Rarity. “Did Twilight hook herself up to one of those dreadful magical enhancers?” Spike shook his head. “Nope,” he said. “That would leave behind some kind of extra magical residue that you could see. Like slime or a shimmer in the air or something. I remember Twilight talking about it.” “We gotta send a message to the Princesses,” said Applejack. “They’re the most powerful magic users in all of Equestria, so they must have the answer!” “You’re right, Applejack,” Fluttershy said. “The Princesses will know what to do.” The mares all nodded. Spike grabbed the quill that he always kept behind his ear for emergency friendship reports and rummaged through the librarian desk until he found a scroll. “Dear Princesses Celestia and Luna…” The rocking of the ship and her weak legs made it difficult for Twilight to stand up properly, but she managed after a few false starts. Wrapping and tying the blanket firmly around herself with her teeth, she took a few wobbling steps forward and opened her eyes fully. There was a lot more light than she expected to be in the hold of a ship, but other than that, it was pretty much as she expected—dank and made of wood. It was wide and low, with lots of crates and boxes. Is this a shipping barge? She stopped to examine one of the lights, attached to the ship by crudely-wrought iron, and noticed that it was actually a enchantment instead of an actual flame. Pretty fancy for a ship like this. She stepped a little closer to the wall to balance herself against it and groaned. The pain in her side had flared up again. Twilight simply gritted her teeth and continued to walk slowly, each movement of her legs adding a little more pressure to the area. Somepony was shouting above decks, but she paid them no mind. Just so long as they don’t shout “Giant squid ahead!”, I think I’ll be fine, she thought, smiling a little at her own joke. After what seemed like ages of stumbling around, Twilight finally saw natural light spilling in from a square hole cut into the ceiling. Attached to it was a ladder made of rope and planks. She doubted that she could climb it in her current state without a lot of help. “Hello?” she shouted, finding her voice for the first time since the raft. “Is anypony up there?” The shouting above her stopped, and she heard hooves shuffling across the deck. “Hello?” shouted Twilight again. “Yeah, yeah. I heard ya. Don’t get yer tail in a twist.” Twilight recognized the voice as the stallion Granny Applejack had been arguing with. She waited a moment, and the stallion’s foreleg popped through the hole. “C’mon now,” said the stallion. “Don’t be shy. I won’t bite ya unless yer into that kind of thing.” Twilight, despite herself, blushed when the pony above her started to laugh. She climbed the first rung of the ladder, just enough so she could grab the stallion’s hoof. He grunted and then began to pull her up. “A heavy one, ain’tcha?” he muttered. For her part, Twilight simply remained silent and let herself be pulled through the hole. The bright light of the sun stung at her eyes, and she was forced to close them. Once she felt the stallion stop his pulling on her foreleg, she opened them again. For a second or two, she was completely blinded by the light reflecting off the ocean, but her eyes quickly adjusted. All around her was water with no land in sight. Twilight’s eyes grew wide, and she choked back a scream. “Ya alright?” She didn’t look to him. Instead, Twilight looked to the only constant she had—the sun. “Celestia,” she muttered. “Celestia!” Twilight turned and faced the stallion, a frown on her face. “Celestia!” she shouted. “Take me to Princess Celestia!” “Who?” The gravity of that simple question weighed down on her, and there was a silence between the two ponies. “Ya alright?” asked the stallion again, reaching out to her with a hoof. Twilight flinched away from his touch but remained silent. No Princess… No Ponyville… “Look, ya must be pretty tired. Get some rest down in the hold, and we’ll get ya to Port Jonagold safe and sound.” Twilight exploded. “I don’t want to go to Port Jonagold! I don’t want to go get some rest! I want to go home! I want to go to Ponyville! I’m Twilight Sparkle, and I demand that you get me to Princess Celestia!” The stallion was quiet for a second. Then, he began to laugh. “You really believe that you’re Twilight Sparkle, huh? Well, I hate to tell you this but Twilight Sparkle has been dead for over a thousand years.” The Good Ship Honeycrisp, Part 2The ride to Canterlot was a long and bumpy one, but nopony aboard the sky-carriage complained. “Do you think she’ll be alright?” asked Fluttershy, breaking the silence that had hung over the carriage since they left Ponyville. “I’m sure she will be,” said Rarity. “Yeah,” said Rainbow Dash. “Twilight’s tough, just like me. She’ll be fine if she can remember what I taught her.” “What didja teach her, exactly?” asked Applejack, her hat over her eyes and her hind legs on back of the seat in front of her. “How to be awesome, obviously,” Rainbow Dash said, chuckling. Despite the somber mood, or perhaps because of it, they all laughed with Rainbow Dash. Pinkie Pie’s giggling was the loudest and lasted long after the others had stopped. “Pinkie Pie!” exclaimed Rarity. “Could you please stop that, dear?” “But I’m laughing double for Twilight!” said Pinkie through bouts of raucous laughter. Rarity’s bottom lip trembled for a moment, and she pulled her friend into a hug. Pinkie Pie’s chuckles were muffled as Rarity held her head in her shoulder. The entire carriage-full of ponies converged on their friend, piling onto the hug. Even Spike joined in. “It’ll be okay,” said Fluttershy softly. “The princesses will know just what to do.” “I sure hope so, Fluttershy,” said Spike, looking off at Canterlot where all their hopes laid. “I sure hope so.” Twilight Sparkle wanted nothing more than to vaporize the stallion where he stood, but there were a few hindrances to that plan. One was that, in her current state, she’d probably just end up tickling him with whatever deadly spell she sent his way. The second was that this sudden murderous rage was likely brought on by stress and dehydration. The third was that she could barely make full sentences, let alone concentrate on her magical power long enough to perform even the most basic of spells, so she decided to play it safe. “Wha—what do you mean Twilight Sparkle’s dead?” she asked. The stallion’s green eyes looked puzzled for a second or two before settling back into haughtiness and then he answered, “I mean that she’s dead. Kaput. Gone-zo. Pushing up dais—“ “I know what ‘dead’ means!” shouted Twilight, stomping her hoof. “Then why’d you ask such a stupid question?” Twilight’s voice caught in her throat for a moment, giving the stallion enough time to laugh at her again. “Look,” he said, “go back below decks. It’s pretty darn obvious that yer a ‘lil bit loopy from yer swim earlier, so why don’tcha just be a good filly and—“ “Don’t you patronize me, you… you… ruffian!” There was a pregnant pause between the two ponies, only to be broken a few seconds later by the stallion dropping to the deck and laughing. “’Ruffian’? What are ya, some kind of Canterlot housewife?” said the stallion, using his forelegs to scratch behind his ratty, yellow ears. “’Oh, mister! A ruffian has just defiled the main hall with his foul stench!’” Twilight’s ears perked. “Canterlot?” she asked. “There’s still a Canterlot?” The stallion finished scratching himself and let out a satisfied sigh. “Yup,” he said. “Of course there’s ‘still’ a Canterlot. Hasn’t gone anywhere. Can’t, I don’t reckon, considerin’ it’s a city and all…” “That means the Elements of Harmony might still be there!” exclaimed Twilight with more energy than she had felt since she woke up on the raft. “You’ve got to take me to them!” For the umpteenth time, the stallion threw back his head and laughed. “I don’t gotta do anything. In case you’ve forgotten, yer on my ship and—“ “Yer ship?” Both Twilight and the stallion turned around, facing Granny Applejack—standing there with a twisted frown on her wrinkled face. Now that she could see her in the light of day, Twilight realized that she looked nothing like her Applejack at all. Her coat was browner and more mottled, her mane shorter and unkempt. The only thing that resembled her friend was the old mare’s bright green eyes, matching the stallion that she had interrupted. “Get back in yer hole, Granny!” shouted the stallion in a huff. “Goodness knows them dishes need a good washin’!” Granny Applejack rounded on the stallion faster than she thought possible for an old mare and for a moment, Twilight saw fear on his face. “Now you listen to me, Hawkeye Eugene Delicious,” the old mare said after spitting out what looked to be an apple seed. “Yer gonna treat the both of us with respect or, so help me, I’m gonna dangle ya off the side by yer family jewels and let the seaponies come and getcha. Do I make myself clear?” The stallion gulped and mumbled something that Twilight couldn’t hear. “Do I make myself clear?” “My name’s Hawkeye, Granny,” said the stallion, looking at the deck. Granny Applejack let out a snort and said, “Don’t be tryin’ to save face just ‘cause yer in front of a pretty mare. It’s a grandmother’s right to call her grandchild by their full given name. Now, do I make myself clear?” “Yes, ma’am.” “Then scat. Shoo. Me and her have got some business to take care of, and we don’t need a ‘lil colt in the way.” Twilight giggled despite herself, and he shot her a dirty look as he stalked away—jumping down the hole to the hold. “Now that he’s gone,” said Granny Applejack, now looking at Twilight, “we can talk about what to do with ya.’ “What to do with me?” asked Twilight, puzzled. Granny Applejack nodded sagely, and Twilight was reminded of a withered bobble head. “There’s the matter of where yer gonna go when we get to Port Jonagold, and the matter of what we’re gonna call you, and all sorts ‘o matters we’ve gotta deal with. But for starters, there’s this.” Granny Applejack pulled a piece of cloth out of her saddlebags and dropped it to the deck. She pointed at it with a hoof. “Take a look at this, dear.” she said. Twilight bent her head and looked at the cloth. What she saw made her whinny in surprise. “But that’s—” The old mare nodded again and said, “Yes siree. That’s you, part of a thousand-year-old tapestry. Don’t know how you lost yer wings though.” Twilight brought the cloth to her face with her hooves. In her mind, she checked off items on a list. Purple, check. Star cutie mark, check. Stripe in the mane, check. Horn, check. Wings…? “Where did you get this?” asked Twilight softly. “It’s been in our family for generations, so I can’t rightly tell ya,” said Granny Applejack. “Is there more?” Granny Applejack shook her head and said, “Nope. I suppose we did have the whole thing at one time, but life on the sea has eaten away all but this ‘lil piece.” Twilight began to shake and shiver, dropping the piece of tapestry. Granny Applejack moved closer to her, supporting her with her body. “This must be so terrible for you, dear.” Twilight shook her head numbly and muttered, “It’s fine. It’s fine.” Tears ran down her face as she mumbled the same words over and over again. “It’s fine. It’s fine.” “Don’t go lying to yerself now,” said Granny Applejack, placing a hoof on the other mare’s shoulder. “As my Granny Applejack used to believe, lying doesn’t help nopony.” Twilight let her tears fall to the deck and then wiped her face with her hoof. Through blurry eyes, she looked at the cloth a final time. “Well,” began Granny Applejack, pulling herself away from Twilight, “there’s a couple more things we need to talk about, if ya don’t mind.” Twilight shook her head slowly, her eyes flickering up to look at the old mare’s face, and said, “I don’t mind.” Granny Applejack nodded curtly and said, “Well, there’s the matter of what to call ya. ‘Twilight Sparkle’ is a bit of a touchy name in these here parts.” “Why?” “I don’t have time to give ya a history lesson at the moment,” said Granny Applejack. “But I can tell ya this—if ya mention that name to the wrong kinda pony, you might just end up with yer guts for garters. It’s as simple as that.” Twilight frowned, displeased by the old mare’s answer, and asked, “Well, what should I call myself then?” “Ya certainly can’t pass as an Apple, that’s fer sure,” said the old mare, rubbing her chin with her hoof. “There’s a couple ‘o unicorns in our family, but none of them look anything like ya. So you’ll just have to come with a new name all yer own. Shouldn’t be too hard. Yer a smart mare. But right now, this isn’t yer biggest problem, is it? Yer wantin’ to go to Canterlot, are ya? Heard that much.” Twilight nodded, perking up a bit, and said, “Yes. I need to get there as soon as possible so I can gather the Elements of Harmony.” The old mare gave a chuckle and said, “The Elements of Harmony? Aren’t those just part of old mares’ tales? You’d be better off chasing the seapony king than looking for them. Besides, even if they were real, what would ya do with them?” “Well, the Element of Magic might be able to amplify my own magic enough so that I can break through whatever teleportation block that’s been cast on this place and get home.” Granny Applejack looked confused for a moment before shaking her head and saying, “Even if the Elements of Harmony exist and even if they’re in Canterlot, yer going to have a hard time finding a ship and a crew willing to take ya to there.” “Why?” “I don’t know how to rightly put this,” said Granny Applejack, staring off into the sea, “but them ponies in Canterlot… Well, they’re a right bunch of jackasses and bigots. No offense to actual jackasses, mind ya. See, somepony like you might be able to get in, but I doubt they’ll let somepony like me in, if ya catch my drift.” It took her a moment to understand what the old mare was saying and when it finally hit her, it left a nasty taste in her mouth. “So you’re saying that they only allow unicorns in?” Granny Applejack nodded. “Eeyup. Plus, I don’t think ya can use yer fancy magic and teleport yerself in. The unicorns I’ve talked to, and these have been few and far between, say that there’s some kind of force field that keeps ponies from just moseying on over like that.” “Granny!” shouted a familiar voice from the front of the ship. “Yes, Lady?” barked Granny Applejack in return. Lady shuffled into view, looking even larger in the light than Twilight had thought. She pointed an orange foreleg towards the sea. “Port Jonagold is straight ahead!” Granny Applejack let out a satisfied sound and turned back to face Twilight, a wide smile on her face and her tail flicking back and forth. “Ah, it’s nice to be home,” she said. “We’ll be making port soon. Might want to think of that name right quick now.” Welcome to Port JonagoldThe mares and Spike arrived in Canterlot late in the afternoon, landing on one of the royal palace’s many spacious balconies. Both princesses were waiting for them there, their royal guards surprisingly absent. “Princesses Celestia and Luna,” said Rarity, bowing. The rest of the mares did the same, and the princesses gave them nods in response. “There’s very little time for formalities if what your letter said is true,” said Princess Luna, motioning them over with a hoof and beginning to walk back into the palace. “‘Very little time’?” asked Spike, having to jog to keep pace with the princesses. “What do you mean?” “What my sister means,” said Princess Celestia, “is that we must act quickly if we are to save Twilight.” “Save her?” asked Fluttershy. “Is she in danger?” “Very much so,” said Princess Luna simply. The group continued to walk through the halls of the palace, their confusion only growing with every second that their questions were unanswered. Eventually, they arrived at an enormous set of ornate, white doors. “Ever since the wedding,” said Princess Celestia, placing her horn on the doors’ simple lock, “we’ve had to move the Elements of Harmony to a position where they can be easily obtained, yet safe.” Princess Luna placed her own horn against the lock and said, “So we both decided that the best place to hide them would be in a place that only the two of us together can access.” There was a stillness in the air as the princesses took a deep breath. “Are you ready, sister?” asked Princess Celestia. “I am ready.” A silence fell over them as they closed their eyes. There was a blinding light for a split-second, and then Princess Luna pushed the doors open with a single hoof. Behind them was a simple white-washed room, in the center of which was a wooden table. On the table was a wooden box. Princess Celestia stepped through the doors, and a shiver seemed to run through the air. Once inside, the princess looked as if she was underwater, her form distorted and strange. Spike stepped forward and reached out a claw. “No!” cried Princess Luna, pulling him away with her magic. “You must not touch the threshold while my sister is inside. There is a powerful spell guarding everything that enters that room, and it would surely kill you were you to disturb it.” Spike nodded and took a step back. They watched as Princess Celestia picked up the box with her magic and walked slowly, as if in the thickest of quicksand, back towards the doors. There was another shiver, one that seemed to come from everywhere at once, as she crossed the threshold. The princess’ eyes looked tired for just a moment, but she quickly regained her regal composure. “Come,” she said. “There is much to do.” As the ship approached Port Jonagold, Twilight Sparkle was surprised to discover that it wasn’t really a port at all—at least not in the traditional sense. It was more of a haphazard collection of buoys, ships, and planks that all seemed to be held together by rope and hope. “This is Port Jonagold?” she asked Hawkeye, who had slunk back above deck. “What?” he snapped. “Not good enough for ya?” The yellow stallion grumbled something she didn’t catch and stormed off, pushing past her. “Don’t mind him,” said Lady over her shoulder, standing at the helm. “My brother is a ‘lil bit... um…” “Cranky?” They shared a laugh, and Lady answered, “Yeah. He’s just not used to things not goin’ his way. Give him a bit ‘o time, and he’ll warm up to ya.” “Hopefully not too much,” said Twilight, giggling. Lady chuckled and said softly, “Ain’t that the truth. Not to be rude or anythin’, but any mare that gets too close to my brother either ends up heartbroken or… uh… pregnant. But ya don’t have to be with him in… um… ‘that way’ to get along with him.” “Let’s hope not,” said Twilight, turning to face Port Jonagold again in embarrassment. “You and me both,” said Granny Applejack, letting out a barking laugh before spitting out an apple seed. “Like I need more bastard grandchildren.” “We’re almost there, Granny,” said Lady. “Is the cargo ready?” “Should be.” “What’s your cargo?” asked Twilight. “Zap apples, ‘o course!” exclaimed Granny Applejack. Twilight was silent for a moment, puzzled, and then asked, “But is there any land for them to grow on in this area?” “Nope,” said Lady, “we’ve been on the sea for a long time to get these zap apples.” “But the only place they grow is… Ponyville,” said Twilight slowly, turning to Granny Applejack. “Yup,” said Granny Applejack. “But, like I said, it’s a nasty place, especially fer a unicorn like you.” “A unicorn like me?” “Well… For one,” said Lady, staring straight ahead with her hooves still at the helm, “yer a unicorn. They don’t much like unicorns in those parts, to put it kindly. Two, and don’t take this the wrong way, ya don’t exactly look…” “Look what?” Granny Applejack cackled and said, “Well, dear, Lady isn’t one to point this out about other ponies, but ya ain’t exactly the most intimidating pony we’ve ever seen.” Twilight frowned and said, “If you knew me, you might think I was pretty intimidating.” The old mare laughed again. “Sure, sure. Ya might know a couple spells that can rip the flesh right off our bones, but I haven’t seen you use any magic since we fished ya out of the sea.” Twilight paused for a moment and brought a hoof to her horn. It felt normal enough, with no pain coming from it or any noticeable cracks that she could feel. “Woah now,” said Granny Applejack, still chuckling, “I didn’t mean to give ya any ideas.” “Here we are, Granny!” shouted Lady. “Can ya call up Hawkeye from the hold?” Twilight dropped her hoof and closed her eyes. She took a couple of breaths, in and out. On her third breath in, she focused her magical energy on something that every unicorn knew—the illumination spell. She felt Granny Applejack brush past her and heard her say, “Is yer horn supposed to be doing that?” Twilight saw a comforting glow from behind her eyelids and smiled. There was no pain, no confusion, no ocean. All there was was Twilight Sparkle and magic. Everything’s going to be just fine, she thought, feeling the sun soak into her coat. “Hold it!” shouted the burly earth pony stallion as he boarded the Honeycrisp. “Oh, shush,” said Granny Applejack, hobbling over to face him. “Ya know exactly who we are, Alderman. Goodness, I remember helpin’ yer ma push ya out of her!” The stallion looked embarrassed but quickly regained his composure and said, “Of course, Granny. Sorry. But, uh…” “Spit it out! I don’t have all day!” barked Granny Applejack. “These zap apples might last forever, but I won’t!” He pointed a hoof at Twilight and asked, “Who’s she?” Twilight took a step back and readied herself just in case. In case what? What could you possibly do? You can’t teleport anywhere, and if you’re thinking about that concussive spell— She silenced her inner monologue for a moment and managed to stutter out, “Ah-I’m… I’m—” “She’s Sunset Shimmer!” shouted Lady, stomping her large hoof against the deck with such force that Twilight thought the ship was going to break in two. “Sunset Shimmer?” repeated Twilight, confused for a moment before bouncing back. “Yes! I’m Sunset Shimmer!” The burly stallion rolled his eyes and said, “Good for you. I was askin’ more about yer business here in Port Jonagold.” Granny Applejack tutted and shook her head. “Did ya even look at the mare’s cutie mark? It’s pretty darn obvious that she’s the Honeycrisp’s new navigator! I mean, check out the size of that north star on her flanks!” Twilight blushed a little as the stallion’s eyes moved to her cutie mark. “Well, if ya say so, Granny,” said the stallion, shrugging his shoulders. “I know so, Alderman. And don’t think I won’t tell yer ma about this.” The stallion looked exasperated and said in a defeated tone before walking the gangplank back onto his own ship, “Go right on through." “Welcome,” said Granny Applejack to Twilight, “to our home sweet home.” Author's Note I'm going to be MIA the week of Christmas. Just a heads up to anyone expecting this pace to continue through the holidays. :)
The Open SeaTwilight's mouth tasted like salt. She smacked her lips together, musing upon the strange grainy texture on her tongue, and rolled over. The cold smack of the water against her bare coat made her open her eyes. Her head was underwater for a moment. Twilight saw the raft above her and stretched up a hoof towards it, kicking her hind legs furiously. Once her face broke the surface, she took a series of deep, gulping breaths—more out of shock than anything else. She turned her head to the left and saw the open sea stretched out before her. To the right was the same. She scrambled aboard the raft, her heart pounding. Twilight’s mind raced through the advice Princess Celestia had given her on the chance that she should ever find herself completely lost and alone. Even though it was advice for a young filly, Twilight thought that it could be applied in this situation. “Fuh-first off,” she said aloud, teeth chattering from the icy water seeping into her mane, coat, and tail, “calm down.” This was easier said than done. Every breath she took ended in her shuddering. Every heartbeat was abrupt. Even running her hoof through her mane only made her feel the slimy seaweed that laid in the depths of the water she had just climbed out of that would tangle around her legs and keep her at the bottom of the ocean forever. However, in the middle of these morbid thoughts came an idea that snapped her out of her rapid decline into panicking. “Of course!” she shouted as her head snapped up, nearly tipping over the raft with her sudden movement. “The teleportation spell!” Twilight closed her eyes and concentrated on where she wanted to go. She thought of the library—the dusty smell of books, the feel of the magically warped tree against her hooves, the sound of wind rustling through the branches above, the taste of Spike’s homemade lemon cookies, the look of raindrops on the windows after a storm. Then, focusing her energy on all of these things, her horn began to glow a bright pink. She felt herself floating off the raft. After a few seconds, she opened her eyes. The glow was blinding, and Twilight felt her horn throbbing violently—the pain emanating from it spreading through her forehead and down to her neck. Her mouth hung open, and she began to scream. For a moment, she saw Spike. His mouth was moving, and his eyes were turned to a pony that she couldn’t see. “Spike!” she screeched, reaching out a hoof to touch him. He turned towards her, and she could read his lips. “Twilight?” Twilight’s horn felt like it was splitting in two. She screamed Spike’s name one last time before cutting off the power behind the spell. The glow flickered and sputtered, sparks coming out of her horn and burning into her face. Twilight howled, and the light from her horn stopped suddenly—the pain in her skull beginning to ebb. Her entire body twitched, collapsing hard onto the raft. It trembled and shook before dumping her into the sea. Underwater once again, Twilight didn’t have the energy to kick herself up to the surface again. Instead, she closed her eyes and let herself sink. Twilight felt something rough move across her face, and she kicked her hind legs in response. Somepony made a tutting noise with their tongue like a primary school teacher as she did so. “That won’t help you none, dear,” said a scratchy but feminine voice. “Just calm down and let ‘ol Applejack do her work.” Something in her brain stirred upon hearing that name, but it took a moment for it to click into place. Applejack… Applejack! Twilight tried to raise her head up and open her eyes. However, both tasks at once seemed too complex for her to manage. Instead of doing either, she retched—the strong stench of salt and bile now in her nostrils. She noticed that something liquid was coming out of her ears. Twilight let out a groan, the only sound her throat let her make. “See? I told ya, didn’t I?” said the voice again. The roughness that moved across her face was now brushing at her belly, and she realized that there was a dull pain coming from there. Twilight opened her eyes slightly and twitched her hoof towards the area. “Ah, ah, ah,” said the voice. “No touching until I’ve done my work now, ya hear?” Twilight let out another groan that was supposed to be a noise of agreement. She could barely see the blurry shape of another pony above her, but it was enough to realize that it wasn’t her Applejack. She’s not wearing the right hat, for one , she thought. And she’s too hunched over. I thought Rarity nagged bad posture out of her already. She decided to attempt words again, if only to ask this pony to stop rubbing at her sore spot. “Hu-Who” —Twilight retched again, but this time nothing came up. —“ah-are you?” The pony above her let out a harsh bark that she supposed could be considered laughter amongst hardy sailors and the like. “I’m Granny Applejack,” she said. “It’s nice to know that yer not as dead as I thought. Hate cleaning up corpses. Who’s this I’m talkin’ to?” “Twi-Twilight Sparkle.” There was a heavy pause before the pony spoke again. It was like the silence before a teacher gave their student a failing grade. Twilight wondered inanely if she was back in Magic Kindergarten. “You must really be out of it,” muttered the pony. “Sea water must’ve done somethin’ to yer brain.” Something about this made Twilight want to chuckle before she realized that opening her mouth again would likely result in more seawater spewing out of her stomach. Instead, she tugged her lips up into a weak smile. “Don’t be wasting yer energy on doing silly things like that. You’ve got yerself a bad case of the chills—hypothermia if yer the fancy type—and you’ll be needing all that fight to get yerself warm again. Plus, and don’t take this the wrong way now, yer kinda all scummy and nasty from yer little dip in the big blue. Scumminess leads to infection and infection leads to pus coming out of ya and pus coming out of ya leads to a lot of bad things. Believe you me.” It was pretty hard to follow the pony as she rambled on, but Twilight got the gist of it—no smiling and you’re sick. Lovely. Now if only she said that in fewer words for those of us with our brains leaking out of our ears, she thought. She felt the pony shift a little above her, and the rough thing began to slide down her back. “Where… am… I…?” asked Twilight slowly. “Now that’s a question worth askin’, m’dear,” said Granny Applejack. “Yer on the good ship Honeycrisp, about eight nautical miles from Port Jonagold.” “Ship?” That would explain part of the rocking motion that she felt, though she suspected most of it was coming from her brain short-circuiting. “Yes, a ship. Where else didja think we were?” Twilight bit back a snarky remark and instead remained silent. It was becoming clear that she was far away from any place that she knew. The only thing that would help her now would be to find out just how far. “D-Do you know of a pluh-place called ‘Ponyville’?” “Yes, sirree,” said Granny Applejack. “But that’s a rough and tumble place for a nice unicorn like you to be askin’ about. Unless I rescued a digger. Are you a digger, dear?” Twilight thought this question over for a second but decided to tell the truth in the end. “No.” Granny Applejack gave a satisfied harrumph and said, “Thank goodness. It’s not like I need another in the family, after all.” There was a scuffling up above, and somepony shouted, “Granny! Quit yer tending and get up here!” “Once I get up there, I’m gonna teach ya some respect!” Twilight let out a moan of pain. All of the shouting wasn’t exactly helping her head, which had just started to throb with renewed vigor. “Now look whatcha done!” shouted Granny Applejack. Twilight moaned again. “Oh! Sorry, dear.” “Just come up here already, ya old sea hag!” Between the bursts of pressure being put on her brain, Twilight realized that the voice from above was most certainly male and most certainly annoying. “Fine! I’m a’comin’! Butcha won’t like it when I do!” “Whatever, Granny!” The rubbing along her spine stopped, and Twilight felt the air shift as she was tucked into a scratchy but warm blanket. “Just get some sleep now, dear. You’ll feel better after a quick nap,” whispered Granny Applejack before she left. “I’ll be back in two jiffs.” Twilight let out a noise that she hoped sounded agreeable and watched Granny Applejack’s shadowy figure walk away from her. Within what felt like a few seconds to her, she was fast asleep—dreaming of places she had left behind. Spike had woken up that morning to the sound of a powerful spell tearing its way through the library. Ponyville being Ponyville and Twilight being Twilight, he wasn’t exactly surprised. Still, that didn’t mean that he wasn’t concerned. Wiping the sleep from his eyes, Spike ran downstairs to Twilight’s study. ‘Twilight! Are you alright?!” There was no answer, and a cold chill ran down his spine. He ran a little faster and continued to shout out her name. “Twilight! Twilight!” Once he got to Twilight’s study, Spike stopped dead in his tracks. The once meticulously stacked papers were scattered across the floor. The books from the shelves, carefully arranged by author and title, laid strewn around the room. There was a scorch mark by the desk that looked suspiciously pony-shaped. “Twilight?” croaked Spike one last time. Whatever answer he was expecting never came. Author's Note Thank you for giving this story a chance! This is my first work of fiction ever, so I would really appreciate some feedback. Try to catch the blatant references to a fairly obscure game from a not-so obscure series!
The Good Ship Honeycrisp, Part 1Twilight woke up to somepony moving her blanket away from her shivering form. She tried to grab it back, but her limbs wouldn’t respond. “How ya feelin’, Miss?” asked a light and airy voice that she didn’t recognize. “Blanket… please,” was the best she could reply. There was a shuffling sound, and she was tucked into another warm cover. Twilight snuggled her head into it the best she could and sighed. “Is that better?” the voice asked. She nodded her head slightly. “That’s good,” said the voice with an audible smile. “Uh… that’s right! I haven’t told ya my name yet, have I?” There was a brief pause, as if the pony was expecting her to respond. Twilight remained still and silent. “Well, my name’s Lady. Granny Applejack told me aboutcha, but she didn’t mention yer name…” “Twilight… Sparkle…” There was another pause, this time followed by a nervous giggling. “Granny told me that about you. I just didn’t think you’d, ya know, stick to that story once ya really came to.” Twilight would have rolled her eyes if she had the energy to do so. What was it about her name that was so strange? A compelling question, surely, but one that would have to wait until she was out of death’s grip. She was able to open her eyes a little more than the last time she tried, and Twilight could see the blurry shape of a hulking pony sitting beside her. She felt like she should’ve recoiled in shock but found that she had neither the energy nor the will to do so. “Sleep… I want… sleep…” “I’ve gotta make sure ya eat something first,” said Lady. “Granny Applejack was very… um… insistent about that.” Twilight groaned. Her stomach was still full of sea water and it sloshed around painfully. She wasn’t sure if she could eat, much less want to. Something hard tried to shove its way through her lips, and it took Twilight longer than she would like to admit to realize that it was Lady doing it. She opened her mouth to moan in protest, but that just made the other pony’s job easier. “It’s just a cracker,” said Lady. “It’s the only thing that we think ya can keep down right now. Just chew and swallow.” The cracker tasted like sawdust and as it mixed in with the still lingering salt in her mouth, Twilight wanted to gag. She passed it over from her tongue to her teeth, crunching down on it and feeling it being pulverized into a stomach-churning paste. She swallowed the nasty mixture of cracker, salvia, salt, and bile and hoped she wouldn’t have to feel it come back up. “Good job, Miss.” Twilight half expected a doggy treat or a pat on the head. Instead of voicing this particular piece of snarkiness, she gave the blurred mass of a pony a twitch of her lips. “That’s right,” said Lady. “Ya gotta keep yer spirits up! We’ll be in Port Jonagold soon, just you see. I’m sure you’ll be feeling better by then!” She’s certainly one for optimism, isn’t she? There was an uncomfortable silence between them for a moment or two before Twilight felt the air shift and a gentle hoof move under her head. She groaned as her neck protested. It wasn’t until she felt liquid against her lips that she understood. Truth be told, Twilight was thirsty. Something to do with all that seawater, she thought. All that salt can’t be good for me. She opened her mouth and let it flow across her tongue, but the taste of it made her spit it right back out. Twilight desperately wanted to retch again but stopped just short of doing so, coughing and sputtering instead. “Yeah, Granny’s apple cider takes a little while to get used to,” said Lady, “but it’s the only drink that’ll stay fresh on the ship so…” Twilight just nodded and coughed violently, still trying to get the rest of the apple cider out of her throat. Her entire body was shaking and shivering and twitching under the blanket. A disturbingly clear thought parted the fog that had settled on her mind. I’m going to die, aren’t I? “Whaddaya mean Twilight’s missing?!” shouted Rainbow Dash at the top of her lungs. The rest of the ponies assembled winced. “Like I was saying,” said Spike, taking his claws out of his ears, “Nopony’s seen Twilight since last night, and that includes me.” “That doesn’t mean she’s missing,” said Rarity. “She could’ve been called to Canterlot or gone for a walk in the Everfree to see Zecora or—” “Wouldn't she have left a note for Spike though, Rarity?” interrupted Applejack, pointing her hoof towards the baby dragon. “Twilight’s a real responsible pony.” “Yeah!” exclaimed Pinkie Pie, bouncing a little. “I mean, remember when she went out to lunch last week and sent us all notes telling us the address and which table she was sitting at in case we needed her?” “Uh-huh,” said Fluttershy. “She certainly wouldn’t just leave any of us without an explanation.” “That’s what’s really weird about this whole thing,” said Spike, nodding. “This morning, there was this really powerful teleportation spell and—” “Did Twilight cast it?” asked Rainbow Dash, waving a hoof. Spike drew his claws over his face in exasperation. “Like I was saying, I checked its magical signature using one of the doodads from Twilight’s study, and it matched up exactly with hers—except a lot stronger.” “So what does that mean?” asked Rarity. “Did Twilight hook herself up to one of those dreadful magical enhancers?” Spike shook his head. “Nope,” he said. “That would leave behind some kind of extra magical residue that you could see. Like slime or a shimmer in the air or something. I remember Twilight talking about it.” “We gotta send a message to the Princesses,” said Applejack. “They’re the most powerful magic users in all of Equestria, so they must have the answer!” “You’re right, Applejack,” Fluttershy said. “The Princesses will know what to do.” The mares all nodded. Spike grabbed the quill that he always kept behind his ear for emergency friendship reports and rummaged through the librarian desk until he found a scroll. “Dear Princesses Celestia and Luna…” The rocking of the ship and her weak legs made it difficult for Twilight to stand up properly, but she managed after a few false starts. Wrapping and tying the blanket firmly around herself with her teeth, she took a few wobbling steps forward and opened her eyes fully. There was a lot more light than she expected to be in the hold of a ship, but other than that, it was pretty much as she expected—dank and made of wood. It was wide and low, with lots of crates and boxes. Is this a shipping barge? She stopped to examine one of the lights, attached to the ship by crudely-wrought iron, and noticed that it was actually a enchantment instead of an actual flame. Pretty fancy for a ship like this. She stepped a little closer to the wall to balance herself against it and groaned. The pain in her side had flared up again. Twilight simply gritted her teeth and continued to walk slowly, each movement of her legs adding a little more pressure to the area. Somepony was shouting above decks, but she paid them no mind. Just so long as they don’t shout “Giant squid ahead!”, I think I’ll be fine, she thought, smiling a little at her own joke. After what seemed like ages of stumbling around, Twilight finally saw natural light spilling in from a square hole cut into the ceiling. Attached to it was a ladder made of rope and planks. She doubted that she could climb it in her current state without a lot of help. “Hello?” she shouted, finding her voice for the first time since the raft. “Is anypony up there?” The shouting above her stopped, and she heard hooves shuffling across the deck. “Hello?” shouted Twilight again. “Yeah, yeah. I heard ya. Don’t get yer tail in a twist.” Twilight recognized the voice as the stallion Granny Applejack had been arguing with. She waited a moment, and the stallion’s foreleg popped through the hole. “C’mon now,” said the stallion. “Don’t be shy. I won’t bite ya unless yer into that kind of thing.” Twilight, despite herself, blushed when the pony above her started to laugh. She climbed the first rung of the ladder, just enough so she could grab the stallion’s hoof. He grunted and then began to pull her up. “A heavy one, ain’tcha?” he muttered. For her part, Twilight simply remained silent and let herself be pulled through the hole. The bright light of the sun stung at her eyes, and she was forced to close them. Once she felt the stallion stop his pulling on her foreleg, she opened them again. For a second or two, she was completely blinded by the light reflecting off the ocean, but her eyes quickly adjusted. All around her was water with no land in sight. Twilight’s eyes grew wide, and she choked back a scream. “Ya alright?” She didn’t look to him. Instead, Twilight looked to the only constant she had—the sun. “Celestia,” she muttered. “Celestia!” Twilight turned and faced the stallion, a frown on her face. “Celestia!” she shouted. “Take me to Princess Celestia!” “Who?” The gravity of that simple question weighed down on her, and there was a silence between the two ponies. “Ya alright?” asked the stallion again, reaching out to her with a hoof. Twilight flinched away from his touch but remained silent. No Princess… No Ponyville… “Look, ya must be pretty tired. Get some rest down in the hold, and we’ll get ya to Port Jonagold safe and sound.” Twilight exploded. “I don’t want to go to Port Jonagold! I don’t want to go get some rest! I want to go home! I want to go to Ponyville! I’m Twilight Sparkle, and I demand that you get me to Princess Celestia!” The stallion was quiet for a second. Then, he began to laugh. “You really believe that you’re Twilight Sparkle, huh? Well, I hate to tell you this but Twilight Sparkle has been dead for over a thousand years.”
The Good Ship Honeycrisp, Part 2The ride to Canterlot was a long and bumpy one, but nopony aboard the sky-carriage complained. “Do you think she’ll be alright?” asked Fluttershy, breaking the silence that had hung over the carriage since they left Ponyville. “I’m sure she will be,” said Rarity. “Yeah,” said Rainbow Dash. “Twilight’s tough, just like me. She’ll be fine if she can remember what I taught her.” “What didja teach her, exactly?” asked Applejack, her hat over her eyes and her hind legs on back of the seat in front of her. “How to be awesome, obviously,” Rainbow Dash said, chuckling. Despite the somber mood, or perhaps because of it, they all laughed with Rainbow Dash. Pinkie Pie’s giggling was the loudest and lasted long after the others had stopped. “Pinkie Pie!” exclaimed Rarity. “Could you please stop that, dear?” “But I’m laughing double for Twilight!” said Pinkie through bouts of raucous laughter. Rarity’s bottom lip trembled for a moment, and she pulled her friend into a hug. Pinkie Pie’s chuckles were muffled as Rarity held her head in her shoulder. The entire carriage-full of ponies converged on their friend, piling onto the hug. Even Spike joined in. “It’ll be okay,” said Fluttershy softly. “The princesses will know just what to do.” “I sure hope so, Fluttershy,” said Spike, looking off at Canterlot where all their hopes laid. “I sure hope so.” Twilight Sparkle wanted nothing more than to vaporize the stallion where he stood, but there were a few hindrances to that plan. One was that, in her current state, she’d probably just end up tickling him with whatever deadly spell she sent his way. The second was that this sudden murderous rage was likely brought on by stress and dehydration. The third was that she could barely make full sentences, let alone concentrate on her magical power long enough to perform even the most basic of spells, so she decided to play it safe. “Wha—what do you mean Twilight Sparkle’s dead?” she asked. The stallion’s green eyes looked puzzled for a second or two before settling back into haughtiness and then he answered, “I mean that she’s dead. Kaput. Gone-zo. Pushing up dais—“ “I know what ‘dead’ means!” shouted Twilight, stomping her hoof. “Then why’d you ask such a stupid question?” Twilight’s voice caught in her throat for a moment, giving the stallion enough time to laugh at her again. “Look,” he said, “go back below decks. It’s pretty darn obvious that yer a ‘lil bit loopy from yer swim earlier, so why don’tcha just be a good filly and—“ “Don’t you patronize me, you… you… ruffian!” There was a pregnant pause between the two ponies, only to be broken a few seconds later by the stallion dropping to the deck and laughing. “’Ruffian’? What are ya, some kind of Canterlot housewife?” said the stallion, using his forelegs to scratch behind his ratty, yellow ears. “’Oh, mister! A ruffian has just defiled the main hall with his foul stench!’” Twilight’s ears perked. “Canterlot?” she asked. “There’s still a Canterlot?” The stallion finished scratching himself and let out a satisfied sigh. “Yup,” he said. “Of course there’s ‘still’ a Canterlot. Hasn’t gone anywhere. Can’t, I don’t reckon, considerin’ it’s a city and all…” “That means the Elements of Harmony might still be there!” exclaimed Twilight with more energy than she had felt since she woke up on the raft. “You’ve got to take me to them!” For the umpteenth time, the stallion threw back his head and laughed. “I don’t gotta do anything. In case you’ve forgotten, yer on my ship and—“ “Yer ship?” Both Twilight and the stallion turned around, facing Granny Applejack—standing there with a twisted frown on her wrinkled face. Now that she could see her in the light of day, Twilight realized that she looked nothing like her Applejack at all. Her coat was browner and more mottled, her mane shorter and unkempt. The only thing that resembled her friend was the old mare’s bright green eyes, matching the stallion that she had interrupted. “Get back in yer hole, Granny!” shouted the stallion in a huff. “Goodness knows them dishes need a good washin’!” Granny Applejack rounded on the stallion faster than she thought possible for an old mare and for a moment, Twilight saw fear on his face. “Now you listen to me, Hawkeye Eugene Delicious,” the old mare said after spitting out what looked to be an apple seed. “Yer gonna treat the both of us with respect or, so help me, I’m gonna dangle ya off the side by yer family jewels and let the seaponies come and getcha. Do I make myself clear?” The stallion gulped and mumbled something that Twilight couldn’t hear. “Do I make myself clear?” “My name’s Hawkeye, Granny,” said the stallion, looking at the deck. Granny Applejack let out a snort and said, “Don’t be tryin’ to save face just ‘cause yer in front of a pretty mare. It’s a grandmother’s right to call her grandchild by their full given name. Now, do I make myself clear?” “Yes, ma’am.” “Then scat. Shoo. Me and her have got some business to take care of, and we don’t need a ‘lil colt in the way.” Twilight giggled despite herself, and he shot her a dirty look as he stalked away—jumping down the hole to the hold. “Now that he’s gone,” said Granny Applejack, now looking at Twilight, “we can talk about what to do with ya.’ “What to do with me?” asked Twilight, puzzled. Granny Applejack nodded sagely, and Twilight was reminded of a withered bobble head. “There’s the matter of where yer gonna go when we get to Port Jonagold, and the matter of what we’re gonna call you, and all sorts ‘o matters we’ve gotta deal with. But for starters, there’s this.” Granny Applejack pulled a piece of cloth out of her saddlebags and dropped it to the deck. She pointed at it with a hoof. “Take a look at this, dear.” she said. Twilight bent her head and looked at the cloth. What she saw made her whinny in surprise. “But that’s—” The old mare nodded again and said, “Yes siree. That’s you, part of a thousand-year-old tapestry. Don’t know how you lost yer wings though.” Twilight brought the cloth to her face with her hooves. In her mind, she checked off items on a list. Purple, check. Star cutie mark, check. Stripe in the mane, check. Horn, check. Wings…? “Where did you get this?” asked Twilight softly. “It’s been in our family for generations, so I can’t rightly tell ya,” said Granny Applejack. “Is there more?” Granny Applejack shook her head and said, “Nope. I suppose we did have the whole thing at one time, but life on the sea has eaten away all but this ‘lil piece.” Twilight began to shake and shiver, dropping the piece of tapestry. Granny Applejack moved closer to her, supporting her with her body. “This must be so terrible for you, dear.” Twilight shook her head numbly and muttered, “It’s fine. It’s fine.” Tears ran down her face as she mumbled the same words over and over again. “It’s fine. It’s fine.” “Don’t go lying to yerself now,” said Granny Applejack, placing a hoof on the other mare’s shoulder. “As my Granny Applejack used to believe, lying doesn’t help nopony.” Twilight let her tears fall to the deck and then wiped her face with her hoof. Through blurry eyes, she looked at the cloth a final time. “Well,” began Granny Applejack, pulling herself away from Twilight, “there’s a couple more things we need to talk about, if ya don’t mind.” Twilight shook her head slowly, her eyes flickering up to look at the old mare’s face, and said, “I don’t mind.” Granny Applejack nodded curtly and said, “Well, there’s the matter of what to call ya. ‘Twilight Sparkle’ is a bit of a touchy name in these here parts.” “Why?” “I don’t have time to give ya a history lesson at the moment,” said Granny Applejack. “But I can tell ya this—if ya mention that name to the wrong kinda pony, you might just end up with yer guts for garters. It’s as simple as that.” Twilight frowned, displeased by the old mare’s answer, and asked, “Well, what should I call myself then?” “Ya certainly can’t pass as an Apple, that’s fer sure,” said the old mare, rubbing her chin with her hoof. “There’s a couple ‘o unicorns in our family, but none of them look anything like ya. So you’ll just have to come with a new name all yer own. Shouldn’t be too hard. Yer a smart mare. But right now, this isn’t yer biggest problem, is it? Yer wantin’ to go to Canterlot, are ya? Heard that much.” Twilight nodded, perking up a bit, and said, “Yes. I need to get there as soon as possible so I can gather the Elements of Harmony.” The old mare gave a chuckle and said, “The Elements of Harmony? Aren’t those just part of old mares’ tales? You’d be better off chasing the seapony king than looking for them. Besides, even if they were real, what would ya do with them?” “Well, the Element of Magic might be able to amplify my own magic enough so that I can break through whatever teleportation block that’s been cast on this place and get home.” Granny Applejack looked confused for a moment before shaking her head and saying, “Even if the Elements of Harmony exist and even if they’re in Canterlot, yer going to have a hard time finding a ship and a crew willing to take ya to there.” “Why?” “I don’t know how to rightly put this,” said Granny Applejack, staring off into the sea, “but them ponies in Canterlot… Well, they’re a right bunch of jackasses and bigots. No offense to actual jackasses, mind ya. See, somepony like you might be able to get in, but I doubt they’ll let somepony like me in, if ya catch my drift.” It took her a moment to understand what the old mare was saying and when it finally hit her, it left a nasty taste in her mouth. “So you’re saying that they only allow unicorns in?” Granny Applejack nodded. “Eeyup. Plus, I don’t think ya can use yer fancy magic and teleport yerself in. The unicorns I’ve talked to, and these have been few and far between, say that there’s some kind of force field that keeps ponies from just moseying on over like that.” “Granny!” shouted a familiar voice from the front of the ship. “Yes, Lady?” barked Granny Applejack in return. Lady shuffled into view, looking even larger in the light than Twilight had thought. She pointed an orange foreleg towards the sea. “Port Jonagold is straight ahead!” Granny Applejack let out a satisfied sound and turned back to face Twilight, a wide smile on her face and her tail flicking back and forth. “Ah, it’s nice to be home,” she said. “We’ll be making port soon. Might want to think of that name right quick now.”
Welcome to Port JonagoldThe mares and Spike arrived in Canterlot late in the afternoon, landing on one of the royal palace’s many spacious balconies. Both princesses were waiting for them there, their royal guards surprisingly absent. “Princesses Celestia and Luna,” said Rarity, bowing. The rest of the mares did the same, and the princesses gave them nods in response. “There’s very little time for formalities if what your letter said is true,” said Princess Luna, motioning them over with a hoof and beginning to walk back into the palace. “‘Very little time’?” asked Spike, having to jog to keep pace with the princesses. “What do you mean?” “What my sister means,” said Princess Celestia, “is that we must act quickly if we are to save Twilight.” “Save her?” asked Fluttershy. “Is she in danger?” “Very much so,” said Princess Luna simply. The group continued to walk through the halls of the palace, their confusion only growing with every second that their questions were unanswered. Eventually, they arrived at an enormous set of ornate, white doors. “Ever since the wedding,” said Princess Celestia, placing her horn on the doors’ simple lock, “we’ve had to move the Elements of Harmony to a position where they can be easily obtained, yet safe.” Princess Luna placed her own horn against the lock and said, “So we both decided that the best place to hide them would be in a place that only the two of us together can access.” There was a stillness in the air as the princesses took a deep breath. “Are you ready, sister?” asked Princess Celestia. “I am ready.” A silence fell over them as they closed their eyes. There was a blinding light for a split-second, and then Princess Luna pushed the doors open with a single hoof. Behind them was a simple white-washed room, in the center of which was a wooden table. On the table was a wooden box. Princess Celestia stepped through the doors, and a shiver seemed to run through the air. Once inside, the princess looked as if she was underwater, her form distorted and strange. Spike stepped forward and reached out a claw. “No!” cried Princess Luna, pulling him away with her magic. “You must not touch the threshold while my sister is inside. There is a powerful spell guarding everything that enters that room, and it would surely kill you were you to disturb it.” Spike nodded and took a step back. They watched as Princess Celestia picked up the box with her magic and walked slowly, as if in the thickest of quicksand, back towards the doors. There was another shiver, one that seemed to come from everywhere at once, as she crossed the threshold. The princess’ eyes looked tired for just a moment, but she quickly regained her regal composure. “Come,” she said. “There is much to do.” As the ship approached Port Jonagold, Twilight Sparkle was surprised to discover that it wasn’t really a port at all—at least not in the traditional sense. It was more of a haphazard collection of buoys, ships, and planks that all seemed to be held together by rope and hope. “This is Port Jonagold?” she asked Hawkeye, who had slunk back above deck. “What?” he snapped. “Not good enough for ya?” The yellow stallion grumbled something she didn’t catch and stormed off, pushing past her. “Don’t mind him,” said Lady over her shoulder, standing at the helm. “My brother is a ‘lil bit... um…” “Cranky?” They shared a laugh, and Lady answered, “Yeah. He’s just not used to things not goin’ his way. Give him a bit ‘o time, and he’ll warm up to ya.” “Hopefully not too much,” said Twilight, giggling. Lady chuckled and said softly, “Ain’t that the truth. Not to be rude or anythin’, but any mare that gets too close to my brother either ends up heartbroken or… uh… pregnant. But ya don’t have to be with him in… um… ‘that way’ to get along with him.” “Let’s hope not,” said Twilight, turning to face Port Jonagold again in embarrassment. “You and me both,” said Granny Applejack, letting out a barking laugh before spitting out an apple seed. “Like I need more bastard grandchildren.” “We’re almost there, Granny,” said Lady. “Is the cargo ready?” “Should be.” “What’s your cargo?” asked Twilight. “Zap apples, ‘o course!” exclaimed Granny Applejack. Twilight was silent for a moment, puzzled, and then asked, “But is there any land for them to grow on in this area?” “Nope,” said Lady, “we’ve been on the sea for a long time to get these zap apples.” “But the only place they grow is… Ponyville,” said Twilight slowly, turning to Granny Applejack. “Yup,” said Granny Applejack. “But, like I said, it’s a nasty place, especially fer a unicorn like you.” “A unicorn like me?” “Well… For one,” said Lady, staring straight ahead with her hooves still at the helm, “yer a unicorn. They don’t much like unicorns in those parts, to put it kindly. Two, and don’t take this the wrong way, ya don’t exactly look…” “Look what?” Granny Applejack cackled and said, “Well, dear, Lady isn’t one to point this out about other ponies, but ya ain’t exactly the most intimidating pony we’ve ever seen.” Twilight frowned and said, “If you knew me, you might think I was pretty intimidating.” The old mare laughed again. “Sure, sure. Ya might know a couple spells that can rip the flesh right off our bones, but I haven’t seen you use any magic since we fished ya out of the sea.” Twilight paused for a moment and brought a hoof to her horn. It felt normal enough, with no pain coming from it or any noticeable cracks that she could feel. “Woah now,” said Granny Applejack, still chuckling, “I didn’t mean to give ya any ideas.” “Here we are, Granny!” shouted Lady. “Can ya call up Hawkeye from the hold?” Twilight dropped her hoof and closed her eyes. She took a couple of breaths, in and out. On her third breath in, she focused her magical energy on something that every unicorn knew—the illumination spell. She felt Granny Applejack brush past her and heard her say, “Is yer horn supposed to be doing that?” Twilight saw a comforting glow from behind her eyelids and smiled. There was no pain, no confusion, no ocean. All there was was Twilight Sparkle and magic. Everything’s going to be just fine, she thought, feeling the sun soak into her coat. “Hold it!” shouted the burly earth pony stallion as he boarded the Honeycrisp. “Oh, shush,” said Granny Applejack, hobbling over to face him. “Ya know exactly who we are, Alderman. Goodness, I remember helpin’ yer ma push ya out of her!” The stallion looked embarrassed but quickly regained his composure and said, “Of course, Granny. Sorry. But, uh…” “Spit it out! I don’t have all day!” barked Granny Applejack. “These zap apples might last forever, but I won’t!” He pointed a hoof at Twilight and asked, “Who’s she?” Twilight took a step back and readied herself just in case. In case what? What could you possibly do? You can’t teleport anywhere, and if you’re thinking about that concussive spell— She silenced her inner monologue for a moment and managed to stutter out, “Ah-I’m… I’m—” “She’s Sunset Shimmer!” shouted Lady, stomping her large hoof against the deck with such force that Twilight thought the ship was going to break in two. “Sunset Shimmer?” repeated Twilight, confused for a moment before bouncing back. “Yes! I’m Sunset Shimmer!” The burly stallion rolled his eyes and said, “Good for you. I was askin’ more about yer business here in Port Jonagold.” Granny Applejack tutted and shook her head. “Did ya even look at the mare’s cutie mark? It’s pretty darn obvious that she’s the Honeycrisp’s new navigator! I mean, check out the size of that north star on her flanks!” Twilight blushed a little as the stallion’s eyes moved to her cutie mark. “Well, if ya say so, Granny,” said the stallion, shrugging his shoulders. “I know so, Alderman. And don’t think I won’t tell yer ma about this.” The stallion looked exasperated and said in a defeated tone before walking the gangplank back onto his own ship, “Go right on through." “Welcome,” said Granny Applejack to Twilight, “to our home sweet home.” Author's Note I'm going to be MIA the week of Christmas. Just a heads up to anyone expecting this pace to continue through the holidays. :)
