“I’ll trade you my Haunter for your shiny Pikachu!” Diamond Tiara offered, her Neightendo 3DS in hoof as she sat next to her friend, Alula.
“You really like Pikachu that much?” Alula sighed as she started going through her pokemon, looking for her shiny Pikachu. “I mean, it’s only level five.”
“It’s a shiny Pikachu.”
“Your Haunter is level eighty-five.”
“It’s. A. Shiny. Pikachu,” Diamond Tiara growled as she waited impatiently for her friend to get the trade over with. Soon, my shiny Pikachu, soon we’ll be together forever! she thought gleefully to herself.
“Alright, if you say so.” Fricken psycho Alula thought to herself as she finally found, in her opinion, the lamest shiny pokemon. The only difference she could see was that it was slightly brighter than a ordinary Pikachu. “Alright, got it.”
“Finally!” Diamond Tiara squee’d in excitement. “Now, let’s hurry up and-”
“Oh, my 3DS died!” Alula growled, huffing in annoyance.
“...No,” Diamond Tiara whimpered, tears threatening to spill from her eyes, “this can’t be, why? SWEET CELESTIA, WHY!?” She dropped down onto her bottom as she cried out in agony, unable to comprehend the fact she could continue the trade by giving Alula her spare 3DS.
Meanwhile, Silver Spoon was busy examining her hooves, so really it was a typical school day.
“I have a shiny Pikachu,” Sweetie Belle said, showing Diamond Tiara her screen, which indeed had a Shiny Pikachu.
“...You wanna trade for my Haunter?”
“I was kinda hoping you had a Kadabra,” Sweetie Belle chuckled nervously, “but if you don’t, I guess Haunter would-”
“Oh, no worries,” Diamond Tiara said as she dusted herself off. “I do have a Kadabra. I was considering using it in my party, but I decided it was way too ugly,” she said shaking her head.
“Great! Let’s hurry before class starts!” Sweetie Belle said as she and Diamond Tiara started preparing the trade. A minute later and Diamond Tiara had her Shiny Pikachu, this one a level twelve, and Sweetie with her level thirty-two, newly-evolved Alakazam.
“Oh Pikachu,” Diamond Tiara cooed at her screen, “your beauty is second only to mine!” Quickly saving her game, Diamond Tiara looked at the classes clock and found she still had a few minutes before class started. I should be able to get one more trade in, she thought to herself as she looked at her pokemon for ones she no longer wanted while thinking of any adorable ones she desired.
“Hey, Apple Bloom,” Sweetie Belle called out, “do you want to trade pokemon with me?”
“Sorry, Sweetie Belle, but I don’t have one of them 3DS thingies,” Apple Bloom replied as she sat down in her seat.
“...What?” No, there was no way Diamond Tiara had heard that right. “Did you just say...you don’t own a 3DS?” Surely she had heard wrong, after all, what family would be cruel enough as to deprive a child of a beautiful 3DS? Not even the town hicks would be that cruel…right?
“Eeeyup,” Apple Bloom replied, glaring at Diamond Tiara. “Is that a problem?”
“Is it...a problem?” Diamond Tiara chuckled as she wrapped her hoof around Apple Bloom’s neck. “Oh, it’s not a problem; IT IS A SIN!” she yelled as she roughly turned Apple Bloom’s head to stare into her glaring eyes. “Don’t you know about Celestia’s eleventh commandment?! ‘Thou shalt own thy own 3DS!’”
“There are only ten commandments, Diamond Tiara,” Apple Bloom sighed as she tried to pry away her head to no avail. How is she so dang strong?! Apple Bloom asked herself. She almost considered pushing Diamond Tiara away, but decided against it.
“But if there was a eleventh commandment, then it would be ‘Thou shalt own thy own Neightendo 3DS!’ You would know that if you had half a brain!” Diamond Tiara said, resisting the urge to slap Apple Bloom.
“Look, it’s not like I don’t want a 3DS, it’s just mah family can’t afford it,” Apple Bloom said as she finally pushed Diamond Tiara away. “‘Sides, why do you care?”
“Why do I care?! I care because it’s sick and wrong not to own a 3DS!” Diamond Tiara yelled in Apple Bloom’s face, making her ears ring in pain. “What kind of sick family deprives a child the joys of a 3DS?!”
“She has a point!”
“Shut up, Button Mash!” Diamond Tiara yelled as she threw her eraser at Button Mash, who growled in annoyance.
“See if I ever invite you over to gaming night again,” he grumbled to himself as he went back to his own 3DS, glaring at the screen as the gym leader unleashed another earthquake. “OH COME ON!” he yelled as he threw his game system to the ground, breaking it in two. “...Mom is so going to kill me!” he cried in terror as he tried to put the two pieces back together.
“And you!” Diamond Tiara yelled as she grabbed Apple Bloom and dragged her across the room.
“Hey, let go of me!”
“We’re going to buy you a 3DS, right now!”
“But ah don’t have any-”
“I’ll buy it!” Diamond Tiara growled as she made it to the door, which promptly swung open, revealing a angry Cheerilee.
“Diamond Tiara, just what in the name of Celestia do you think you are doing?!” Cheerilee asked angrily.
“I’m taking Apple Bloom to the game store to buy her a 3DS!” Diamond Tiara responded, holding Apple Bloom tightly, “now get out of my way!”
“You do not talk to your teacher that way!”
“I’ll pay you money.”
“Oh, I do wonder where Diamond Tiara and Apple Bloom went? I guess I’ll just start class without them,” Cheerilee said to herself as she went to sit at her desk, taking a bag of bits Diamond Tiara hoofed over to her.
“Well, now that that’s taken care of, we can go and get you your Neightendo 3DS!” Diamond Tiara said happily as she dragged a disgruntled Apple Bloom across town, giggling all the while.
“Here we are!” Diamond Tiara said as she pointed at the video game story. “Isn’t it glorious?” she asked, gazing lovingly at the building.
“Uh. Yeah, sure it is,” Apple Bloom replied. “Alright, let’s get this over with.”
“Hold it!” Diamond Tiara yelled out as she held her hoof in front of Apple Bloom. “What do you think you’re doing?” Diamond Tiara growled, earning a confused look from Apple Bloom.
“Ah though we were here to buy me a 3DS,” Apple Bloom replied. “So what’s the problem?”
“Do you really think the store clerk is going to sell a 3DS to a bunch of kids?”
“Why no-”
“Who are supposed to be in school?!”
“...Ooooh, yeah, ah see what you mean,” Apple Bloom said as she nodded her head. “So, what’s the plan now?”
“Simple, my dear, Apple Bloom,” Diamond Tiara responded as she dug into her saddle bag. “We go in with a disguise!” she said with a smirk as she pulled out two fake moustaches.
“Uh, you sure those are gonna work?” Apple Bloom asked, unable to hide her skepticism.
“What? We’ll just say we’re two homosexual midgets looking for a 3DS, totally believable!” Diamond Tiara said with a smile, and put on her fake moustache. “Now hurry up and put yours on!”
“Alright, alright!” Apple Bloom said, taking the fake moustache from Diamond Tiara and putting it on her own face. “Are we gonna come up with fake names too?” she asked sarcastically, causing Diamond to laugh.
“Of course not. If he asks we’ll just say it’s none of his business!” Diamond Tiara giggled. She then proceeded into the store, followed by Apple Bloom and walked up to the cash register.
“Hello, good sir, how may I help you!” the stallion behind the counter asked.
“Yes, my good sir, I am in the need of a Neightendo 3DS, an XL if you have any!” Diamond Tiara said, attempting to use a Canterlot accent to go with her moustache.
“Uh, shouldn’t you two be in school?” the stallion asked with a tilt of his head, earning a glare from Diamond Tiara.
“What?! You never seen two homosexual midgets before?!”
“What?! No, sir! I-I mean, yes, sir!”
“What?! So you’re just trying to start something?! Is that it?!” Diamond Tiara yelled as she slammed her hoof into the counter. “I have the right mind to report you to your manager!”
“I’m sorry, sir! Please don’t report me!” the stallion said as he took out the 3DS XL. “Here’s the game system, anything else?”
“Yeah! I want something else!” Diamond Tiara yelled, pointing at a nearby game. “I want that pokemon game! My homosexual life partner’s been wanting it!”
“Yes, sir!” the stallion said as he quickly got the game and hoofed it over to her. “That’ll be, after tax, 254 bits, sir.”
“Here’s your money!” Diamond Tiara growled as she slammed the bag of bits on the counter. “And if you ever discriminate against us homosexual midgets again, I’ll sue your ass so fast you’ll lose the case before you even knew I sued you, got it!”
“Yes, sir!” he replied, tears spilling from his eyes as he watched the two “stallions” leave the store. “I always get the worst shift!” he grumbled to himself as he turned on the television.
“Wow! This thing is so cool!” Apple Bloom giggled as she sat with Diamond Tiara, both of them on their own 3DS. “Ah knew ah was missing out, but ah never thought ah’d miss out this much!”
“I know, right?” Diamond Tiara giggled as she continued playing with her Pikachu. “Like I said before, everypony needs a 3DS!”
“You’re right, Diamond Tiara!” Apple Bloom agreed, scooting over so she was mere inches away from Diamond Tiara. “Sorry ah was being so reluctant earlier, and thanks for the 3DS!”
“Oh, it’s no problem, Apple Bloom!” Diamond Tiara replied, scooting over until their legs were brushing against one another.
“Still, ah really am grateful,” Apple Bloom sighed, brushing her cheek against Diamond Tiara’s. “Is there anyway ah could repay you?” she whispered in Diamond Tiara’s ear.
“Oh? I can think of one thing,” Diamond Tiara whispered back. Turning Apple Bloom’s face towards her own and leaned in, gently brushing her lips against Apple Bloom’s. Their 3DSes forgotten, the two continued kissing, until their families caught them and grounded them for skipping school.
The End
