METAL IN EQUESTRIA : CHAPTER FOUR
"Jiggs, we got a gig in a few hours man. Wake up, lazy-ass."
He held his eyes shut, not wanting to glimpse the light of day. This nap was rather nice. "No Packie, screw you. Gimme a little more sleep. It's good on my bones." He said rather lazily.
"Dude, it doesn't matter. Get the fuck up!"
"Alright, alright. Whatever." Jiggs opened his eyes and stared at the one bright light of the studded ceiling. "When is it exactly? Can you get me a beer?"
"Yeah whatever."
Jiggs looked around from the moldy couch. He was dazed and his eyes were half-open, still adjusting to the light. "Where are we anyway?" He saw Wallace sitting on the couch across from him, cross-legged. His arms rested on the back cushion behind him. "Hey Wally… did Packie go to get me a beer?"
Wallace was still wearing jeans that were moist around the crotch. He had on a blank, black t-shirt. "Yeah, he's comin'. But that won't matter soon."
"Well, why the fuck not?"
"Because you need to wake up first."
"I'm fucking awake, my eyes are open… kinda. Just gimme a minute!"
Wallace started shaking his head. "No, you're still sleeping. Wake up."
"Wha' do ya mean?" Jiggs started to shut his eyes fully.
Then he felt a sudden jolt…
Packie shook Jiggs' lifeless body until he came to. "Wake up, ass!"
He opened his eyes, but this world seemed more real compared to the last one. "That dream seemed weird. Where the fuck are we?"
"Good question, man."
Packie sat next to Jiggs as he lay across the floor of the van. His head had been leaning against the case. The last thing he remembered was driving out of the alley, and then the white light. He remembered falling asleep now, and hitting his head.
The interior of the van was dark because there were no windows. The only beams of light came in through the windshield. "That's really bright shit outside. Isn't it like 3 in the morning?"
Packie sat puzzled. "Well I haven't looked outside yet but I'm guessing the sun's out. We must've been sleeping for a long fuckin' time. I just woke up and I saw you laying back here by my feet. You shoulda wore your seatbelt, Jiggs"
"Not like it fucking mattered. I'm alive ain't I?" Jiggs sat up much like Packie was and held his head for a moment, confused. "Looks like there's trees outside."
Jiggs and Packie could here Wallace snoring like a fire engine. The yellow beams of light barely illuminated the black interior and dust could be seen gently floating like clouds through the air. Some of the light bounced off of objects outside and lit up Wallace's face. Packie shook him violently awake.
"Dude, what the hell man? I was dreaming about cupcakes."
"What cupcakes man?" Packie shot back.
"Y'know like the ones your mom makes… and the ones in her shirt." Wallace let out a little chuckle under his breath.
"Yeah,yeah. What do you see out the front, Wally?" asked Jiggs impatiently.
Wallace turned his head towards the windshield. His seatbelt still strapped across his chest. His eyes grew wide because he knew he had to be dreaming. "There… are… horses… or, no… they're too small… I think they are ponies… but they have weird colors. I… think… one of em' is staring at me. It's mouth is moving too… like it's talking… or something."
"Shut the fuck up man. What do you really see?"
"I ain't shittin' you Jiggs! I know what the fuck I'm looking at!" Wallace sounded half-panicked to death.
Packie and Jiggs stood up and leaned forward to look out the window. Jiggs placed his hand on the seat above Wallace's shoulder. "Well I'll be damned. It's some bright colored horses… no… wait… yeah those are ponies. Is that purple one saying something or just chewin' some grass?"
"Let's go pet em'!" yelled Packie.
Jiggs turned his head to Packie. "How old are you?"
"Twenty…"
"That's what I thought. Come on, guys." Jiggs wasn't sitting around for another minute. He opened up the windowless side door and placed his foot on a brick walkway. Where the hell are we? He thought to himself. There was grass only a foot from the van and lush fields around him for miles. The sun shone brilliantly upon him, it was a cloudless sky. Normally he didn't like only sun, but the air felt cool and breezy. It was a perfect temperature.
He looked toward the two ponies blocking the path. One was blue and the other purple. Jiggs took a second glance and realized that one had a horn protruding from its head and the other had folded wings like a bird. The blue pony had a mane that reflected all colors of the rainbow.

"Ain't that strange. This is a pretty weird dream and I don't even remember getting home last night. I still need to smoke though." He proceeded to light up a cigarette and toked it a few times, and then took a long drag. “I don’t remember smoking in a dream feeling so realistic.”

"What are they?" Rainbow Dash asked openly.
"I don't know, but I almost passed out keeping that portal open. They don't seem hostile." Twilight mused.
Spike held his mouth open tentatively, breathing nervously. He took a few steps back. "Well there's one in that big blue thing staring at us. It looks hungry!"
"Oh stop it Spike. I think they would've attacked us by now if they were hungry." Twilight tried to sound reassuring even though she was somewhat unsteady herself.
Twilight stared at the human blowing smoke with near disbelief. Only dragons breathed smoke, but there was something sticking out of his mouth. Maybe that's where the smoke is coming from, she thought to herself.
All three of them jumped as the human with black hair and cigarette in his mouth started to stroll calmly over toward them. He stood but five feet from Twilight and took one long last drag before crushing the cigarette with his shoe. It grinded between his sole and the pavement.
"So… where are we? Like… this is a dream isn't it?" Jiggs said. He wasn't quite sure that these characters would say anything but he figured it was worth a try.
Rainbow Dash stepped forward two feet and let forth a mean snort like a bull.
"And just what are you exactly?" Rainbow yelled.
Jiggs was pretty relaxed in the new environment. He believed it to be a dream even though it all felt so real and now he had a dream character angry at him.
"Calm down bitch, I'm from Earth… do you know where that is? Oh and I’m a human by the way." Jiggs was sarcastic.
Rainbow Dash was furious. "What did you call me? And what is a human? Do you eat ponies?"
Twilight and Spike stood motion-less, still frightened that the human could even speak their language. Rainbow Dash overlooked that detail.
"Huh? Nah not me. Cow is some good eatin' though. You can call me Jiggs and back there in that van is my crewmates I suppose." Jiggs was not in the least worried. "I think you scared them shitless, but this is a dream so I'm not worried about them."
Twilight realized why Jiggs was so calm now and stepped forward. "You aren't dreaming. This place is real."
"Yeah right… then how the fuck can you talk?" Jiggs eyes shut halfway in disbelief. He wanted to hear her argument.
Twilight already had a full analysis of the situation prepared. "Well I opened a portal to your world and… I'm assuming this place seems odd to you."
"Go on…" he was intrigued.
"…and… well… you probably think this is a dream because of how odd it is. Do you have ponies on earth?" Twilight stood her ground even though Jiggs wasn't amused.
"Well we have many animals, and ponies… but they don't fucking talk… except to those people on tv calling themselves horse whisperers who say they can talk to em'." Jiggs thought that was a decent argument. "So how do you explain that? This has got to be a dream."
Twilight was perplexed but knew the answer. "Hold out your hand."
Jiggs obeyed.
"Spike… breathe a low flame under his palm." The dragon moved towards Twilight's front and obeyed as well. He took a deep breath and blew a low flame similar to a stovetop.
"OUCH! Why didn't you just rip my nuts off instead?" Jiggs blurted.
"What nuts?" Spike asked honestly.
"Oh a smartass, eh?" Jiggs became infuriated. He had small burns on the creases of his palm.
Twilight approached Jiggs before he could say anything else. "Do you believe me now?"
Rainbow Dash had since moved out of Twilight's way because she knew her reasoning was better than her quick temper.
"I… I don't know… I've never felt that in a dream before. That was searing pain."
Twilight couldn't help herself anymore. "So where are you from? How many humans live there? Is there weather that changes? Do you use magic? Am I going to fas—"
"TWILIGHT!" Rainbow Dash finally spoke up. "I'm sorry about that… and how I snapped earlier… but you shouldn't have called me names. We don't use language like that, y'know?"
Jiggs just looked blankly at the blue Pegasus, compiling and reformulating his thoughts. "Holy fuck!" He blurted at once. "You guys are ponies that can talk and you have a tiny little dragon? Oh god I hope I'm not dreaming!"
Rainbow Dash was annoyed. "No… you're not dreaming, and watch your mouth. Will you just answer our questions please?" she asked so politely.
"Uhh…uh… sure I guess… if this place is real then I have no idea where I am. I guess that means I'm stuck here too…" he looked back at the van. Packie and Wallace were waiting for the okay signal. "…with those assholes." He grimaced sternly at this new predicament. “its just gotta be a dream.” He mumbled.
" I think I'll start first…" Rainbow Dash decided to start. "This is our town of Ponyville, behind me there…" Jiggs looked past her at the town and then back to Rainbow "… and this world is called Equestria. Everypony…or… everyone is happy here and we don't really hurt other animals. Ponies have built most of the cities and farms. We all talk… and… I must be missing something…ohh… and… oh yeah that's it! And our ruler is Princess Celestia but she is the nicest and most powerful in all of Equestria… and that's pretty much the whole story."
“Well put, Rainbow.“ added Twilight.
Jiggs sat down on the brick pathway. Rainbow looked down at him perplexed. He was starting to soak it in now. His legs were criss-crossed. He raised one hand and beckoned the two in the van to come to him.
Packie and Wallace slowly slid the doors open and strolled over toward Jiggs. He stood up and turned to face the two in black shirts. "Guys… this ain't no dream. This place is fucking real. We'll just have to deal with it." Packie and Wallace both cocked an eyebrow. They didn't quite seem to believe that.
Jiggs rotated back to Rainbow, Twilight, and Spike.
"We are from Earth… and… I don't know exactly what we're doing here… but… if what the blue Pegasus tells me is true… then we are the most brutal thing on this world."
"We are Superkill?" Packie asked Jiggs.
"Yes… we are Superkill… from Chicago, Illinois… and we need your help…" he turned to face Twilight.
Spike could only stare, he was frozen in time.
The three humans stood by each other and looked into the eyes of Rainbow Dash and Twilight, gauging their emotions.
"I’ve got a bad feeling about this.” Rainbow bluntly stated.