Celestia's New World

October 31 - Halloween

I needed to speak with Sarah. Due to unforeseen circumstances, she wouldn't be meeting with Celestia anytime soon, meaning that I won't be able to meet with her parents. As I walked to work, I thought about how I should tell her. I just wanted to be polite.

What was the excuse I gave Celestia? That I didn't wanna deal with both of them? Yeah, that much is true. I could just change my mind and get it over with. But if it makes Celestia jealous again, I don't want Red to be there to deal with it. She has nothing to do with this. Yeah, that's good. I don't want to go to work. I miss Celestia.

"Hey Sarah."

"Uh... Hey. Is... Is everything alright? You seemed pretty w-worried, yesterday."

"Things are... well... managed, I guess. It was just a bit of trouble with... uh... one of Celestia's friends. But we took care of it. It was a... really personal matter, Sarah. You don't need to concern yourself with it."

"It's... It's alright. That's g-good, though... that it was... taken care of."

"Because of this though, I need to hold off on having you meet her so we can move along with all this."

"O-Oh..."

"I'm sorry, Sarah. It's not that we don't want to. Celestia loves meeting new people and she's always understanding of people's problems, but.. uh... How should I put this... She can get... jealous, at times. That's why she wanted to meet you. She wanted to get to know you."

"That's not... unreasonable."

"Right. But right now, with what happened... It isn't the best time. Sorry."

"It's... ok."

"I'll let you know how things go, Sarah."

"A-Alright."

She was quiet for a while, idly staring downwards. I didn't have anything else to add to the conversation, so I just relaxed in my chair.

"S-So..." she started.

"Hmm?"

"D-Do you have any p-plans for Halloween?"

"Halloween? Oh shit, today's Halloween!"

"D-Did you f-forget?"

"I totally forgot! Aw man, I gotta... Uh... Dang it." Celestia would've loved to go trick-or-treating.

"M-My family hasn't celebrated it in a while. The last time I w-went out was when I was f-fourteen."

"Fourteen? You're never too old for free candy, Sarah. I went out in a Michael Myers costume last year. It was great, I got so much chocolate."

"You trick-or-treated last year? How... um... old are you? If you don't... mind me asking."

"25."

"So you were 24 and you trick-or-treated?"

"Yeah."

"And p-people gave you candy?"

I nodded. "Mmm-hmm. Not everyone. Some people wanna save the candy for the little kids and some people just outright refused to give me any. I couldn't really complain. I just move along to the next house."

"Wow... I n-never would have expected y-you to still be trick-or-treating."

"I would've gone this year if I had a costume prepared." And if Celestia had a costume. And if Red Shadow wasn't trapped in my basement. Today would be the perfect day to escape. There's too many people, especially in costumes. We'd never find her, at least not without Celestia's magic tracking skills.

I rushed home today. We might not have costumes, but Celestia and I could still be involved in the holiday by handing out candy. We didn't live on a popular street, but kids walked down the sidewalk last Halloween, so this year would be no different. The biggest problem with that was that I had no candy.

"Hi Celestia, I'm going to the store, be back in twenty minutes." I said to her, jogging to the kitchen to get my car keys.

"What? Oh hi, Phil. You're going to the store? What's the rush? Can I come?"

"You stay here and make sure Red doesn't leave. Be back soon. Love you." I made sure to give her a drive-by kiss on the cheek before I left.

"Bye, Phil." Even though I rushed through, she was still happy to see me.

The event was just about to start, but thankfully, I had enough time to go to the grocery store and pick up a few bags of candy. I wasn't the only one. A lot of other people were doing some last minute candy shopping.

When I got back home, I told Celestia, "I got candy!"

"Candy!" she celebrated, standing, "What did you get? I hope there's chocolate!"

"I got all sorts of stuff. Come on, let's get this in a big ol' bowl."

"Ok!" she said, a little confused, but happy to be a part of it nonetheless.

"Do you know what today is?" I asked.

"October 31st? Is it... Nightmare Night? It would explain all the candy."

"Close. In this world, we call it Halloween."

"Can I still eat the candy?"

"Not all of it. We have to give some away to the kids."

She gasped. "Oh, children! I can't wait!"

"Just a few more minutes and we'll start seeing trick-or-treaters."

"Oh! Let me help, then!" she said, excitedly grabbing one of the bags.

As I retrieved a bowl, Celestia opened her bag. Before I managed to even put it on the counter, Celestia had unwrapped one of the chocolates and took a bite.

"What?" she asked, mouth full, "Don't look at me like that, I'm helping!"

I sighed. Just looking at her cute, chocolate-stuffed face reminded me of how much I loved her. "Alright, dump the rest in."

"Ok!"

The two of us poured the rest of the bags in and mixed them together. We were as ready as we could be with barely any time to prepare. Though we didn't have any festive decorations, I could still enjoy a holiday with Celestia. That's all I really wanted.

"So Celestia, do you want to wait outside with the candy or inside?" I asked.

"Oh! Outside! Outside!"

I laughed. "Alright, outside it is. You're gonna wanna get a sweater though, sweetie." I told her, "It gets chilly this time of year."

"Ok, I'll be right back. Don't start without me!"

"I won't."

Celestia rushed into the bedroom to collect a sweater. As she did that, I carried the bowl of candy to the front room. We had what we needed, but after giving it a second thought, sitting on the stone stoop for a few hours would get pretty uncomfortable, especially during this time of year.

"Blankets too, Celestia!" I called.

"Ok!" she cheerfully called back.

Not long after, she returned, a number of blankets folded neatly in her arms. She put a lot of care into folding them when she could have very easily just draped them over her shoulder. Why are you so cute, Celestia?

"Our butts'll get cold without those." I said.

"Oh, good idea. Shall we?"

The two of us headed outside, placing the blankets down and sitting, the bowl of candy between us.

"How long should it take before we see someone?" she asked, looking down the sidewalk.

"Shouldn't be long. The lady three doors down that way has a son and a daughter that are young enough to trick-or-treat."

"I wasn't aware there was an age limit."

"I don't believe in that sorta thing. If you have a costume, you get candy."

"What about me? I don't have a costume."

"Yeah, but you're my girlfriend, you can have some whenever you want."

"Even right now?"

"Of course right now, just don't eat it all. You'll get a wicked bad tummy ache."

"I won't, I won't. I'm not a child, I know when to stop."

"You're already eating it."

"So?" she asked, her mouth full of chocolate again.

I sighed, shaking my head.

"Oh! Children!" She snapped her attention to the small group of people walking down the sidewalk. It was a group of four, a man and a woman with two kids. One of the kids had a stormtrooper outfit and the other was a princess in a pink dress. As the two kids saw us, they ran down the sidewalk, much to the chagrin of their parents. However, they let their kids run right up to us without a word, watching them from the sidewalk.

"Trick or treat!" they sang in unison as they got close. The kids held out their bags with expectant looks. At least, I imagined the kid behind the mask was as excited as his sister. He seemed a little short for a stormtrooper, though.

"Oh, aren't you two just so cute!" Celestia exclaimed, a wide smile on her face. She could hardly contain her excitement when faced with such bright smiles. "And what are you two dressed as?"

"I'm a Princess!"

"And I'm a stormtrooper!"

"Oh, how nice." Celestia replied with a smile, "I'm not familiar with stormtroopers, but I'm certainly familiar with Princesses. You see, where I come from, I'm a Princess."

"What?!"

"No way!"

"It's true." I said, "How else would her hair get so pretty?"

"Wow!" they both said, completely awestruck. I know the feeling.

"Oh, I almost forgot!" She reached into the bowl. "For you... and... for you." In each of their bags, she dropped a loose handful of goodies.

"What do you say?" called the mother.

"Thank you!" they said once more in unison.

"Bye, Princess-Lady!" said the boy.

"Bye-bye!" said the girl.

The two of them rushed back to their parents and continued on their journey. Celestia waved them farewell as they left.

"Philly?"

"Yeah, honey?"

"They're so cute... I'm gonna cry."

"You're gonna what?" I looked to her.

"I'm gonna cry." she repeated. Correction, she was already crying.

I wrapped my arm around her and held her close. "Where did this come from?"

"I don't know. I've never had this problem talking to children before." She started wiping her eyes.

"You gonna be alright?"

"I'm fine." She sniffed. "I'm fine. I'm sorry, I don't know what came over me... I'm fine."

"You sure?"

"I'm sure."

"More kids are coming. Are you gonna be alright through the night?"

"I'm fine, honey. They were just... so cute. I want one."

"What?"

"Nothing! Nothing. I didn't say anything. I didn't... I didn't say anything. Why, did you... hear... anything?"

I gave her a long look before I said, "No, I guess not."

She smiled before turning her head to the next group of kids coming our way.

I think we might need to have a little chat about this later.

For the next few hours, it was just the two of us on the front porch. Celestia had a lot of fun handing out candy to the little kids that stopped by. She would usually strike up the cutest conversations, asking what their costume was or how old they were.

It wasn't long past the hour mark, during a lull in traffic, that Celestia leaned against me, making a distinct sniffling sound. She was crying again. I didn't know what it was about handing out candy that made her so happy. Maybe it had something to do with her earlier comment. Just like last time, she quickly got ahold of herself, insisting that nothing was wrong. I knew nothing was wrong. She was happy. So happy...

Towards the end of the night, Celestia struck up a conversation with a brown haired woman that seemed to be in her twenties. They talked about the fair weather and the fun costumes they've seen so far. Apparently someone had been wearing a huge cardboard box as their costume, which Celestia found hilarious. Something about her seemed familiar, but the shadows on her face from the porch light made it hard to see clearly. In the end, even though she wasn't wearing a costume, Celestia offered her a small chocolate bar, which she accepted before leaving.

"It's starting to get late." I said, "It's already past closing time." Halloween officially ends here at 7:30, but sometimes you can see people walking around close to 8:00 or later. It was 8:00 right now.

"Is that so? That's too bad. We still have a lot left."

"I'm sure you're not complaining about that."

"Of course not."

"Come on, let's head in. I know your butt's sore, you've been shifting around for the past hour."

She giggled. "So have you."

I got off the stairs, my knees cracking as they straightened, and placed my hands on my back. I bent myself backwards, and after several satisfying pops, I straightened myself out and offered my hand to Celestia, who took it with a smile. I pulled her to her feet. It was too early to go to bed, but after all this, we were exhausted.

We collected our blankets and went inside, making sure they were clean before we put them back on the bed. As soon as things were settled in the house, Celestia assaulted the candy bowl, taking a handful of chocolates to the front room couch.

I gave it a few seconds of thought before saying through the closed basement door, "We got some candy up here if you want some, Red."

"My parents warned me about taking candy from strangers!" she called back.

"Did they say anything about jewelry?" I retorted.

"Oh, shut up! Alright, I'll be up soon."

Celestia giggled.

Red joined us upstairs for a short while. She was comfortable enough to eat with us, though I could tell that she was still uneasy. I wouldn't ask for anything more. It would be a slow process, but I knew the two of them would make up.

Before we went to bed, I placed the candy bowl in the fridge so the chocolate would stay cold.

November 2

Day four with Red. Celestia found living with a guest to be quite irritating. The more intimate aspects of our relationship were off-limits while someone else was here. If only we had that rule when the guards were here, we could've spared them the embarrassment. Our relationship wouldn't be where it is today if we avoided sex back then.

Aside from love-making, Celestia had a hard time 'being herself' around Red. After all, she was supposed to set an example for her subjects. Thankfully, our bedroom was still private enough for her to laze about.

I was a little annoyed as well. Red took my computer room. I didn't need to use it, but I liked the option.

During the past few days, Celestia had reaffirmed that moving someone to or from Equestria without the aid of the crystal mirror was next to impossible. Though Luna was trying to find a way, it wasn't easy. Red Shadow would be living with us for the remainder of these thirty days.

Celestia must have been speaking with Red while I was at work. They've warmed up to each other quite a bit, at least on a personal level. Celestia still disliked that Red was interfering with our privacy.

Today, Celestia came to me with an urgent look on her face. The empty box of Twinkies in her hands suggested that it was not as important as it could have been. "Phil, we're out of Twinkies!" she cried, shaking the box.

"I bought like six of those things when you got here." I said, trying to conceal my smile at her innocence.

"Well, they're gone now." she replied, concerned.

Though she sounded genuine, I couldn't help but think that her priorities weren't entirely straight. "You're gonna get fat if you keep eating them like that."

"But they're so good!"

"I only had one." I moped.

"Can we go get more?" She gave me a powerful puppy-dog stare.

"You don't have to look at me like that, you know I'll say yes."

Her stare only seemed to intensify.

"Did you want to go now?"

She nodded.

"Alright f... Hey, what about Red?"

Her stare disappeared.

"We could... invite her." I suggested.

"Do you think that's a good idea?"

"I don't see why not."

"I suppose."

"Red!" I called through the open basement door.

"Yes?" she called back.

"We're headed to the store to get food, you wanna come with?"

"Are you sure you want to be bringing me out in public?"

"Just thought you might wanna get outta the house. Up for it?"

"Alright, I'll come with. Give me a sec."

I looked back to Celestia. She didn't seem to mind. Red joined us in the front room. Her hair was frazzled and unkempt.

"You look miserable." said Celestia.

"I haven't showered in a week and a half." she replied.

"Oh, goodness."

"Impressive." I said.

"You said I can't go around naked in this world." she said, looking to Celestia, "And I've tried, it makes me uncomfortable. Makes me feel... well... naked. I'm not wearing the same thing like him, either. No way."

This seems familiar. "Yeah, I guess you got a point. Geez... Um..." I looked to Celestia. She just shrugged. "Yeah, no way around it, you need some new underwear. Celestia's won't fit you. Not that you'd wanna wear hers anyways, I'd imagine."

"Yuck. No."

"Right. Thankfully, you'll be easier to shop for."

"I can help you choose the right ones." said Celestia.

"Why can't he do it?"

"This isn't really... something a man can do." she replied.

"Whatever. As long as I can clean up a little."

"All you need is underwear. You can wear Celestia's clothes." I said.

"Hand-me-downs from the Princess?"

"Clothes are expensive. You're a big girl, you can deal with it."

"Alright, but I won't like it."

"I don't remember asking."

"Ooh, a bit sassy today, are we?"

"A bit sassy every day."

"Mmm-hmm... So when am I going home again?"

We both looked to Celestia.

"27 days. I'm sorry, Red. There's no other option."

"Wow, seriously? What great news that is... I'm just overjoyed to be here." The sarcasm is strong with this one.

"Well, at least you can get your hour in the yard." I said with a smile.

She smirked at me.

The three of us left for the store. Since I needed to get Red underwear, I had to go to Wal-Mart again. It felt a little strange leading around two women, but I got over it. Celestia was attached to my arm as we walked around. Even though we brought Red, Celestia still had her fun.

Red seemed content with her situation. She followed us around without complaint and even seemed to be interested in the world around her. I caught her chewing something a few minutes in, but she just smirked at me. If she got me in trouble, I would not be happy. I glared back at her.

While the original plan was to get more snacks for Celestia, the whole house needed restocking. That, alongside Red's clothes, could cost more than expected. I directed Red to the clothing department, where she and Celestia split off from the cart. I watched them over the clothing racks for a little while before I lost them behind a shelf. If I left to get food, it'd take too long to find them, so I stayed put in the aisle. They returned shortly.

"Find everything alright?" I asked.

"Yeah, I think so." Red replied, "This seems really complicated. Do I have to wear these?"

"Yes." Celestia and I replied in unison. We smiled at each other.

"Trust me, they help." Celestia added.

"Alright, if you say so."

I leaned in towards Celestia and whispered, "Red's not as big as you, they might not be as necessary."

"I suppose."

After Red put the clothes into the cart, we moved to the food section of the store. Celestia went a little overboard with the snacks. She's lucky she's so cute.

When we got home, Red immediately got in the shower. Celestia offered Red her robe for when she got out.

During the few minutes where we were alone, Celestia and I started talking.

"Can we get rid of Red yet?"

She sighed and shook her head. "My sister has made little progress."

"Worth a shot. At least you're starting to become friends."

"It helps that I have someone to talk to while you're gone."

"There ya go, silver lining. What do you talk about, anyways? You're not just abusing her, are you?"

"No, no, I would never. I've gotten past what happened between you and her. She's a good pony inside, even if she is a thief."

"So what's going to happen to her when she gets back?"

"I'll see she gets a fitting punishment. Her lawlessness cannot be ignored, but perhaps some good can come of this. She has so much talent. It would be a shame for it to go to waste. If I could take her in as my pupil, maybe I could help her use her powers for good. What do you think?"

"What do I think? I love it. Great idea."

She smiled. "I'm glad you think so."

"I think it won't be as easy as that, though. Red is... well... If the rest of your ponies find out about this, you might be seen as soft."

"I am soft."

Oh, do I know that... "You know what I mean."

She giggled. "I do. I'm willing to risk appearing soft if I can help my subjects. She has a lot to make up for, though. No matter what, this won't be easy for her."

"You'll figure something out."

She nodded. "I'll need to come up with a decision by the time I go home."

"By the time you go home, huh? You're going at the end of the month again. At least this time we'll know what's happening."

"Don't worry, I'll be back for the next month."

"But... you can't... can you?"

She frowned. "Phil..."

"Luna told me. She said that you can't be here for me every month. I know that she's right. I can't expect you to stay. It really hurts thinking about it."

"I know, Phil. It hurts me, too. I never like when we're apart. It makes me feel even more alone than before I met you."

"Yeah. But if this... keeps happening... To see you only three days a month, Celestia... It's heartbreaking."

She nodded, silent.

"So, Celestia... With that in mind, I... want to ask... What... kind of future do you see for us?"

"What... kind of future? I... I don't know. Our relationship has just started, Phil. It could go anywhere. How can I know? I want to answer, but I can't. All I know is... I love you."

"What kind of future... do you want?"

"What do I want? I... I just want to be with you... Oh, what's gotten into you? You're never this serious. I'm scared of the future, honey."

"I am, too."

"See? You understand. I'm sorry that I can't answer you now, Phil. I'm sorry that I can't... offer any sort of commitment to you. But... I'll have an answer for you. I promise. I don't know when and I don't know what I'll say, but I'll have an answer. But in return... I... I want an answer back. I want you to tell me what future you see for us."

"I already have my answer."

"You do? Wh-What is it?"

"I think you already know."

She didn't respond for a while. I guess I surprised her. Maybe she's wondering what I meant.

I smiled. "Maybe you don't. It's ok. I'll tell you after you tell me, Celestia. Alright?"

She sighed, disappointed but nonetheless accepting of my wishes. "For now... I just want you to remember that I love you. With all my heart."

"I love you too, Celestia."

November 3

Red was sitting at the kitchen table, a cereal bowl in front of her. Her eyes followed me as I poured my own and joined her.

"Getting sick of this place yet?" I asked.

"I was sick of it the day I got here."

"Oh yeah? That's rough. Has the Princess been nice to you? She's not here, you can be honest."

"Yeah, she's been nice. I guess I... don't exactly deserve it, though."

"Not really."

"You weren't supposed to agree with me."

I shrugged. "I'm glad you're getting along. I was worried for a little while. That being said, I can't wait until you're gone."

"How kind of you to say. Yeah, I heard what you and your Princess were saying about me. That it'd be better if I wasn't here. Not saying you're wrong, but it isn't nice to talk about someone behind their back."

"That's fair. I won't say things behind your back, then. I don't want you here any more than you do and you're interfering with our personal life. Still, you're my friend and I'm glad you're safe with us."

"That's a little harsh. You didn't have to say it like that."

"Honesty is important."

"I don't wanna hear about honesty. I'm a thief, it's not exactly in the job description."

I shrugged again before taking a bite of my cereal.

"Hey, did you... really mean that? That I'm... your friend?" She was looking to her food, idly moving her spoon around.

"Yeah. Of course."

She hesitated, still looking down, before saying, "Thanks."

"Oh, hey Red, I had a question."

"Yeah?"

"Are gems actually valuable in Equestria?"

"Of course they are. Why do you ask?"

"I dunno, I just... They aren't too hard to find, is the thing."

"They're still worth a lot. Why do you think I stole them?"

"That's fair. Who do you sell them to?"

"That's pushing it a bit. Your Princess set you up to this?"

"No, I'm just curious."

"That so? Either way, it's none of your business."

"Alright."

I asked her some more questions before I had to go to work. She seemed happy to talk about Equestria, as long as I didn't press her on her line of work. It was interesting to hear a different perspective on Equestria.

Celestia was happily sleeping away by the time I left. If she needed me, she would call. For now, she had Red.

Sarah and I spoke a bit at work, but it wasn't too meaningful. It wasn't much more than a repeat of our previous conversation. Speaking of Sarah, I heard a rumor that her father had gotten this job for her. It wasn't the first time it's happened, though. It's not like it really matters who works here as long as they don't mess things up. She's a fine worker.

For the first few hours, things went smoothly. It wasn't until near the end of my shift that something out of the ordinary happened. I was in the kitchen, doing as I do, when one of the cashiers, a man by the name of Greg, came back and told me, "Hey Phil, someone wants to see the manager."

"Yo, what?" It wasn't the first time this has happened. Though not common, we get all sorts of people asking for me. It was just part of the job.

Standing at the counter was a middle-aged woman with a cup of soda in her hand. Her arms were crossed. As soon as I came into view, her eyes narrowed at me.

"Are you the manager?" she shot at me.

"Yes I am. My name is Phil."

"I don't care what your name is."

Oh... A rude customer. How unlucky for her that I am an incredibly petty man.

"I ordered a cheeseburger without mustard for my son and there was mustard on it! I demand a refund for it!"

"Of course, I'm sorry for the inconvenience. And do you have the receipt?" I said with a smile.

She reached into her purse and slapped her hand onto the counter.

A line had started to form behind her. I tapped my co-worker on the shoulder and pointed to the other register. He went back to work as I spoke with her.

I picked up the receipt and examined it. It listed the alleged cheeseburger without mustard, along with some other food items. The receipt was dated five days ago and was for a different McDonald's location in Illinois.

I placed the receipt back onto the counter. "Everything seems to be in order. Refund for one cheeseburger, $1.05. One moment while I..."

"Not just the burger, the whole meal."

"I'm sorry?"

"I want a refund for the entire order."

I wonder how much harm it would cause if I pushed back a bit... "Well, as you've stated, the burger was the offending item."

"So what? You got my order wrong."

"Indeed. And we will happily reimburse you for the cheeseburger."

"And the rest of the order."

"I'm sorry, but as you have said, the problem lies with the burger. Asking for a refund for an entire order because of one item is not a request we can entertain. I can refund the price of the burger, but not the full order." Need to speak slow for these people. Too many words and the gears in their head start to burn out. Ironic considering I'm just some kid working at McDonald's.

"Well the other burgers had mustard on them, too."

"Indeed. Our cheeseburgers are served with mustard."

Someone in line snickered.

"I ordered them without mustard."

"Is that so? It says on the receipt that they were ordered without any changes."

"Well, you obviously heard me wrong."

"Actually ma'am, it wasn't us who would have heard you wrong. Upon closer inspection, it seems this receipt is from a different location. I suppose that would be on them to give you your refund. I'm sure they'd be more than happy to help you. If you'd like, I could give you their phone number. I could even direct you towards their location."

I know I'm not supposed to be doing this kind of thing, but to see the look on their faces, questioning why this burger-flipper isn't immediately caving to their demands, it's priceless. Really strokes the ego. I can totally give her the refund and send her on her merry way. Oh, but to witness this... Jeopardizing my job has never felt so good.

Though to be fair, in my defense, I didn't actually know if we could refund her. After all, it wasn't our restaurant that committed this heinous crime. In her defense, that's entirely up to me to know.

I'm glad Celestia isn't here to see this. I'd never act like this in front of her. Oh... But if I act like this when I'm not around her, is it really any better? She would never approve. I think I have some issues to work out. That kinda killed the mood.

"It's all McDonald's, who cares where I got it? Are you going to help me or not? I'm not going anywhere until I get my refund."

"Unfortunately ma'am, this seems to be all I can do."

"All you can do?!" she shouted at me.

"Yes, I'm sorry ma'am. Again, I could give you their number, they'll be more than happy to-"

"I don't want their damn number, I want my refund!"

Ah yes, the pièce de résistance... 'If I raise my voice, people will listen'. "There's really nothing else we can do. I'm sorry."

"I'm not going anywhere!"

Now for the cherry on top... The phrase guaranteed to enrage anybody in any confrontation... "Ma'am, I think you should calm down. You're making the other customers nervous."

I didn't know what it was about those two little words, but as if flipping a switch, 'calm down' awakened the demons. There wasn't a single word that she said that I didn't ignore completely.

After the seemingly endless tirade of four letter words came to a stop, I simply replied, "Ma'am, all this shouting is making the other customers uncomfortable. I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to leave."

"Ask me to leave? How dare you?!"

"You will have to return to the other McDonald's restaurant in order to receive your refund. As it stands, we cannot help you. Please leave."

"I'm not going anywhere until you refund my order."

This was honestly starting to sound like a scam. "You're making both my customers and my employees uncomfortable. If you don't leave, I'm afraid I'm going to have to call the police. I would really prefer not to do that."

"You wouldn't dare."

"Ma'am, this is your last chance. Leave now, or I will call the police."

"I'm not going anywhere." she repeated.

Normally, calling the police is a big no-no for us. The presence of an officer scares the customers and looks bad to the superiors. Not one to bluff though, I reached into my pocket and retrieved my phone. As soon as I had unlocked it, she swiped for it, taking it from my hand. She smirked at me, as if she had somehow got the better of me.

At first, I didn't realize what she did. As the reality set in, I could only question how taking my phone helped her. Other people touching my phone made me nervous. Very nervous. I didn't know why, it wasn't like I was ashamed of the adult pictures or erotic stories on it. Maybe it was the risk that they would somehow be deleted. No matter the reason though, when I saw my phone in her hand, my entire body tensed.

I held out an open hand and said simply, "Give that back."

Without warning, a hand struck my face. There was a gasp from the crowd. For such a skinny lady, she hit hard. I sucked in a breath, staring at her as I did.

"Phil?" asked my co-worker, his voice worried, probably for the safety of the woman across the counter.

I took in a deep breath before slowly letting it out. "Greg, please call the police."

He nodded before retrieving his own phone.

Despite the sting, I didn't react any further to the pain. Once more, I said, "Give me my phone and leave... now."

"Give me my money."

Does she really think this will work out for her? "This is the last time I'm going to say this." I growled, "Give me my phone, or I will take it from you."

There was a mountain of reasons preventing me from retaliating. Even if it were legally justified after being struck, I'd lose my job for sure. The ice has been thinning since I met Celestia.

She looked to Greg, then back to me. "Fine."

She slapped my phone against my hand and turned towards the door without another word.

"Still... call the police?" Greg asked after she left. I noticed that he hadn't dialed yet.

"Uh... Shit... Yeah. Lemme take care of it."

"You got it."

"Right... Sorry about the inconvenience, everyone." I announced to the people in line, "Please resume enjoying yourselves."

There were a few sympathetic murmurs from the crowd, but nothing more. Business resumed as usual. The people near the counter simply re-queued into their line and ordered. With the situation de-escalated, I didn't feel the need to bother the police dispatcher. It was easy enough to call the non-emergency number and tell them what happened. They said they would send someone for a copy of the security footage.

"Ow..." I complained to nobody in particular as I sulked off to the break room.

"Are you alright?" asked Sarah.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just a little assaulted."

She was the only one who came to talk. Not that the others didn't care, of course. Most knew that it was better if I was left alone for a little while.

"That didn't end too well, did it?" she asked, staring at the red mark on my face.

I shrugged. "Aren't I great with customers?"

"Well... you got her to leave."

"It took a while."

"Y-Yeah... D-Does this happen often? You seemed pretty calm."

"Not often, but not never. We see people like her from time to time. This is the second time I've been struck when talking to a customer."

"Oh, goodness..."

"They think it's fine 'cause I'm a big guy, but I still got feelings." I chuckled, "But it usually goes well. I don't know why I gave her so much trouble."

"Well, I think you handled it just fine."

"Thanks, Sarah. You know, someone tried to rob this place before."

"What? R-Really? What happened?"

"It was back when I was in Timmy's position. You know, assistant manager. So anyways, this skinny guy in a hoodie walks in and just points a gun at us. Old manager freaked out and ran off, so I stepped in. 'And what can I do for you, sir?', I asked him. He said he wanted the money in the register. And you know what I did, Sarah?"

"N-No, wh-what?"

"I did exactly as he said. Life isn't an action movie. If you endanger yourself or others by taking matters into your own hands, boom, you're fired. They don't need that kind of liability. Anyways, I grabbed a bag, put the money inside, and off he went. Called the police as soon as he was gone and they caught him in like half an hour. He wasn't the brightest knife in the drawer."

She chuckled nervously.

"Old manager was fired 'cause he just left us to fend for ourselves, and between you and me, the numbers at the end of the day didn't always add up. Big dogs look down on that kind of behavior. They were so impressed by my bravery that they promoted me on the spot. Got a raise and everything. I sure didn't feel brave when I went home and threw up that night, though. Made me super nervous for like the next month."

"Oh, I'm so s-sorry."

"It's alright. My face hurts."

"Are you going to be alright?"

"Yeah, I'm good. 'Bout time to go home, anyways. Looking forward to it."

It wasn't long before an officer came to follow up on the report. Thankfully, it didn't take long.

As I walked home, I noticed an extra shadow from behind me. I turned to look and saw that it was an admittedly good looking, brown haired woman in her mid-or-so twenties. Reminded me of the woman Celestia spoke with on Halloween. Actually, it was her. Huh...

"Hello!" I greeted with a wave, slowing so we walked side-by-side.

She responded with a simple, "Hello."

"I think I recognize you from last night. You were the lady that Celestia offered a bar of chocolate."

"Oh, was that her name? I forgot to ask."

"I was surprised to see someone like you. I dunno. You didn't have any kids with ya and you didn't have a costume or a bag, so you weren't trick-or-treating."

"It's not too strange to meet the locals when you move in. With all the people, I figured it wouldn't hurt to strike up a few conversations."

"Oh, you're new here! Ok, I guess that makes sense."

"You must've just got off work with that uniform you're wearing. I remember your house was in this direction."

"That's right."

"So... tell me... That woman, Celestia... Who is she to you? Maybe a... girlfriend?"

"Yeah, she's my girlfriend. We've been living together recently."

"Is that so? I figured I'd ask, just in case."

"I guess." Was she interested in me? Was she interested in Celestia?

"What's with the red mark?" she asked.

"Oh, difficult customer."

"How awful. Is your girlfriend nice?"

She went right back to the Celestia topic. "Yeah, she's a real sweetheart."

"She's very pretty. You're a lucky guy."

"Yeah, I know."

"Not many men can say they've won the heart of a Princess."

I stopped walking.

She took a few more steps before turning around with a smirk on her face. "Oops, maybe I've said too much." She giggled.

"So you're from Equestria, too?" I asked.

"I am. You know what a changeling is, don't you?"

"You're a changeling? What are you doing here?"

"Don't worry, I'm not here to cause any trouble. I simply enjoy being a human. Walking on two legs is a nice change of pace."

"I don't believe you."

"I would have been surprised if you did. I've wondered what the Princess was doing here, but I never would have expected her to fall in love with a human."

"Why are you here? Who are you?" I asked.

"All in due time. You see, I am in need of your services. A certain pony you know has stolen something from me that I would like back."

"Red?"

"Indeed." To my surprise, her eyes trailed downwards. She crossed her arms over her chest as she began shifting on her feet. I didn't know why, but she seemed... vulnerable. "It is something... near and dear to my heart. If I could get it myself, I would. She is in possession of a number of magical artefacts, among them one that grants her the ability to see through my disguise. I can't get close, nor does she trust me."

This is... manipulation. Her body language... Her soft voice... She knew exactly what to say to interest me. I knew who this was.

"Queen Chrysalis?" I asked.

She sighed, her smile fading. "I tried not to make it too obvious, but you really couldn't let me have my fun?"

"Sorry."

"Yes, you're right. I am Queen Chrysalis. Since you already seem to know who I am, it makes this easier. By now, you must realize that this is no small matter to me."

"So, say I believe that you're not here to cause any problems, what do you want me to get from Red?"

Once more, she looked away. "Before I say it, I want you to know that not a soul in Equestria knows about this. Not even my own comrades. It is not something dangerous or... particularly valuable. With this in mind, I expect you to be discreet. I can reward you handsomely."

"I... I can try. So... what is it? What did she take?"

She kept silent. Her gaze shifted away from me.

"Chrysalis?"

"It's... embarrassing to say. You are the only other person who will know about this. She... She stole... a stuffed bear. My stuffed bear."

"Are... Are you serious?"

"I wouldn't come to you if I weren't serious." She crossed her arms, glaring at me,

This could all be a total lie but I believed her completely because I have trouble distrusting ponies. "So you followed her here to retrieve it?"

"Very few of my comrades know I am here. None of them know why. As I said, I am unable to retrieve it myself. I am enlisting your help with this and I do not expect you to do this for free. As you know, I am a Queen. I have the resources of a nation at my disposal. I can and will repay you for this."

"How did you get here, anyways?"

"If you retrieve my... possession, I will tell you."

I paused. If it was a secret, then it could help Luna's information gathering. Should I really do this? Hmm... "Alright... I'm going to be honest with you, Red's a lot smarter than me. She'll see me coming as soon as I let on that I know. So before I accept this, I wanted you to know that I am not confident in my abilities to retrieve it for you."

She took in a breath and let it out slowly. "I am aware. I have no choice in the matter. I cannot get close to Red Shadow and I will not involve my own comrades in this matter. Asking you is my only option. Do we have a deal?" She's been using 'comrade' a lot... Why that particular nomenclature?

She held out her hand to me. I looked at it, then back to her face. She was serious about this. I looked back to her hand. Should I trust her? She'd probably get angry if I say no.

"Alright, deal." I grabbed her hand.

"Thank you." She smiled. "You have quite a special relationship with that Princess of yours, you know."

"Yeah, I like to think so."

"I'm surprised. Your love is so strong. You truly care for her, don't you?"

"Yeah. I do. I love her."

"What would happen if I were to take her form, I wonder."

"I... don't know."

"Not a guess? Perhaps you just don't want to say."

Filthy succubus don't tempt me. "Is there something else you want from me?" I asked, annoyed that she so easily made me uncomfortable.

"Oh, have I struck a nerve? Or perhaps... Do you not like me?"

"I've seen what you do. You're a bad influence."

"That's one way of putting it."

"You know, a disguise like that wouldn't even work out for you in the long run."

"If I can fool the Princess, I can fool you."

"That's not what I..." I paused. "Alright."

"To tell the truth, I had planned on meeting you regardless. Red seems to have sped up the process."

"Why so?"

"You're drawing quite a lot of attention amongst those interested in the Princess. There are other beings in our world keeping their eye on you."

"Really? That's kinda weird to think about. They better not show up here, too. I got enough to worry about."

"You've handled yourself rather well, given the circumstances. You have Princess Celestia quite literally eating from your hands. I've never seen her so... subservient."

"Dunno what you're talking about."

"She's powerful, Phil. More powerful than even I am. You have someone with that much power at your mercy. It's impressive, really."

"Calm down, Chrysalis. She's my girlfriend. We love each other. It's not complicated."

Chrysalis chuckled. "I've known Princess Celestia for a very long time. She is a force to be reckoned with. She's brilliant, powerful, and charismatic. She's an incredible mare. I'm not surprised you've fallen for her the way you have." She chuckled again. "I did not expect her to fall for you. I think I understand why, though. She's just as lonely as anyone else. With that loneliness comes a weakness of sorts. You'd understand if you were as old as we are."

"I don't need you analyzing my relationship, Chrysalis. You gotta mind your own business."

She scowled, crossing her arms. "How rude. I thought we were business partners."

"Just because I'm helping you doesn't mean I have to put up with you. But... I don't want to be on your bad side. So... I apologize for my rudeness."

She chuckled. "You're serious about this. I appreciate your apology. I suppose it's time for me to take my leave. I'll be in touch." She turned and walked away without another word.

"Where are you going?" I asked.

"In due time, Phil. In due time."

I don't think I told her my name.

The disembodied voice of a woman began speaking to me. "Who was that woman you spoke to?" It seems Luna was spying on me.

"It was... I... I don't think I should say."

"I wouldn't advise testing my patience, Phil. She's not normal, your refusal to answer proves this."

"She's from Equestria."

"Is she? Did she tell you that?"

"Yeah. She's someone you know. Someone... not on your side."

"Why are you protecting her?" She seemed to calm down a bit. Luna already knew that I responded well to kindness. It would be easier to get an answer from me like this.

"She might know another way to travel to this world. I'm sure you've been keeping watch on the crystal mirror. It wouldn't be easy for someone to slip through again after all this."

"Astute deduction. And you're afraid if we take action, we could lose this information:"

"Yeah... Yeah. It's... I'll tell you who it is, Luna. It's..."

"No, no... Don't tell me." I heard a chuckle. "This is quite the mystery you've given me. Instead of telling me who it is, tell me what she said."

"She said Red took something from her. It's something personal. Something private. Something that couldn't be dangerous to anyone." I added that last point to try to convince her that Chrysalis meant no harm. I didn't know if I believed it, myself.

"I take it this is a secret as well?"

"Yeah. She asked me to be discreet about it. It's... It's really not my place to share, either."

"Why?"

"It... It's her private possession. Everyone has a right to keep some things secret."

"Everyone? Including you?"

"Well, yeah."

"Are you keeping these secrets from my sister?"

"S-Sometimes."

"Hmm... Just remember where your priorities lie, Phil. I'll keep this from my sister, for now. Is that what you would like me to do?"

"Y-Yeah... Thanks, Luna."

"I bid thee well, Phil. I must return to my studies."

"Luna, wait... before you go..."

"Yes?"

"Do you... Do you see a future for Celestia and I?"

There was a long pause before she finally said, "Goodbye, Phil."

I wasn't given a chance to respond before her presence left my mind. I sighed to myself before saying to nobody, "Bye, Luna."

Well... things have just taken an interesting turn.

I have been given a mission. A mission to retrieve Queen Chrysalis's... teddy bear. Why would Red steal a teddy bear? What kind of person steals a teddy bear? I certainly don't go around swiping people's teddies. Maybe it would be worth a lot if she sold it, I don't know. She said that Red had artefacts on her. What kind of artefacts does she have?

It won't be easy to get information out of Red. This would be an interesting next few days.

After speaking to Chrysalis, I continued home. I briefly looked behind me as I got to my door, but saw nothing.

"Hey, Celestia." I greeted Celestia as she sat on the couch.

She looked up and smiled, but her smile faded as she took a closer look at my face. "What's that red mark?"

"Isn't that a hand?" Red asked, "Oh, someone slapped you!"

"You sure seem happy to say that." I noticed, "This is just something a rude customer gave me."

"What happened?" Celestia asked, an innocent concern in her voice.

I told her what happened at work today, including the part where I told Sarah the story of the robbery, which I also told Celestia. I kept Chrysalis out of it. Mentioning her would just make things more complicated.

Red laughed. "You're a real charmer, aren't you?"

"I'm gonna go shower." I said.

"Ca..." Celestia started to talk, but stopped herself, a disappointed look on her face. I think she had less than pure intentions.

I left the two of them for the basement to get some clothes. I had to wash Red's clothes, including her delicates. She showered yesterday, right? Yeah, she changed. Just like Celestia, there were no size tags on Red's clothes. These missing tags were getting annoying. I probably shouldn't be handling Red's underwear for longer than I have to. If she saw me with them, she'd get the wrong idea. Or she'd poke fun at me. I don't know which is worse.

The shower was uninteresting, though it revealed to me that our hair care products needed replacement. Both Celestia and Red put a lot of care into their hair. The three of us could probably go through a bottle a week. Or more. Or less. I am not good with estimations.

I thought about what Chrysalis said and brainstormed ways to get her bear from Red. Nothing notable came to mind. Soon, my thoughts started to wander. Did Chrysalis have a place to stay? I'd offer for her to stay at my house if it weren't for the obvious. Red is enough as it is. I couldn't see myself making it a foursome no matter how hard I tried.

I heard my phone ringing from the front room. It stopped after a few seconds, which was a little confusing, as it usually rings for quite a while if I don't answer. I found the reason shortly after, with a cheerful greeting from Celestia. She must have answered the phone for me. Kinda strange since she's never done it before.

I stopped washing for a while so I could listen in.

"Hello? He's in the shower right now. Oh, I'm sorry! My name is Celestia. I'm Phil's girlfriend. I should have introduced myself. It's nice to meet you too, Sue. Oh, that sounds wonderful! I'll let him know. I'd love to! Alright. Goodbye, then! I hope to see you soon!"

See you soon? I knew by the name that she was talking to my grandma. I guess she wanted to invite me over, and when she learned about Celestia, she was happy to invite her, too. Honestly, that sounds like such a good idea that I would take Celestia to meet her regardless.

When I was finally clean, I stepped out of the shower and dried myself with a towel. I looked at myself in the mirror, wondering what's really been going on with me since Celestia arrived. My six-pack was long gone. Haven't been to the gym in at least a year. How much did I weigh? I had no idea. I might need a haircut soon. I don't know, I kinda liked it long. I'll ask Celestia.

There was a knock on the door. "Phil? You got a phone call."

"Yeah, I heard you talking."

"I... hope that was ok. It was from your grandmother."

"It's alright. You can talk to my family." I replied.

She giggled. "She invited us to her home. She said that you should bring a rake."

"A rake? Oh, alright. Are you excited?"

"More than I've been in a long time. Truth be told, I was a little nervous when I answered the phone. I'm glad she was so kind to me. She was shocked to hear that you had a girlfriend."

"I bet she was. It's been a while. I guess since we're going somewhere, I may as well shave."

"Good idea. You've gotten messy."

After a short shave, I finally exited the bathroom. I cleaned my mess and met Celestia and Red in the front room. Wait a minute... Red...

"Hey Red, Celestia and I are leaving soon. Don't eat all our snacks."

"You're really just leaving me here alone?" she asked.

"What? She can't stay here on her own." said Celestia.

"Well, I don't wanna bring her with. I'm sure she doesn't wanna come with either, right Red?"

"Nope, leave me out of it."

"See?" I said.

"Are you sure, Phil?"

I nodded. "It'll be fine. Red can stay here while we head out and have fun with the family."

"Well, alright." She smiled. "In that case... Red, I have something for you." She reached into her pocket and retrieved her phone. She held it out to Red, who took it. "Use that to get in contact with us."

Red opened it, then closed it, then opened it again. She raised an eyebrow at Celestia.

"Don't worry, I'll teach you how to use it." Celestia sat next to her on the couch and ran her through the process of making a call.

As they worked with the phone, I moved outside to the garage to retrieve my rake. I kicked the side door open, mainly because it was always stuck and had no functioning knob in the first place. Thankfully, the rake was easy to reach. I grabbed it and put it in the trunk of my car. Celestia was still teaching Red how to use the phone when I returned.

"What is this?!" Red held up the phone to me with wide eyes.

"It's a phone." I answered.

"I know what it is! How does it work?! It's so small!"

"Well, Red... It just works."

"That's not an explanation!"

"It's all you need to know."

"No it isn't! This is just crazy..."

I got out my phone and called the one in her hand. As soon as it started ringing, she pulled her hand away, dropping it to the couch. She just stared at it, letting it ring.

"Careful with that." I said, "You tell her how to answer it yet?"

Celestia picked it up and gave it to Red, who opened it.

I put mine up to my face. "Hello."

She stared at it, then did as I did. "H-Hello?"

"See? Easy." I said into it.

She pulled it away from her face. "Whoa... I saw the Princess pick up yours but I didn't really understand what was happening. Hey, how come yours looks so different from this one?"

"Different model, different features."

"Oh... Ok. This is... pretty cool."

"You'll be fine here on your own, right? Yeah, of course you will. We'll probably be gone all day. Just call if you need something, alright?"

"Yeah, I'll try."

"And don't run away."

"I won't!"

I looked to Celestia. "Ready?"

"Oh, this is so exciting!" she said with a smile.

"I'll take that as a yes. C'mon."

She followed me out to the car, smiling brightly. She's never met anyone from my family. No wonder she's so excited.

To grandmother's house we go.