They came from the Everfree

The cottage was finally cleaned of the blood, organs and tags, and Fluttershy was starting to recover. Things looked brighter for the Ponyvillians. But, as always, the Everfree recurring gag would happen.

This time, what came out of the forest was quite an unusual creature, a stallion again, brown-coated, wearing a tricorne ... with a treasure chest on top of it ... and he wore white shutter shades.

With the previous events, nothing seemed too strange nowadays anyway. So the stallions just got out of the Everfree, just like the other creatures, except that he didn't see the cottage. In fact, he took a completely different path to exit the forest, leading him to the capital of Equestria : Canterlot.

Unfortunately, it will never be explained, how he went from a deep, dark forest to a high mountain. He entered the almost floating city, to be met with two royal guards. "Announce yourself, you who enters this place !" Shouted the guard.

Instead of answering, the stallion positioned himself in front of the guard who spoke, then created a frying pan out of thin air. A tall red hat appeared inside the tool, and the stallion, grinning, declared "Stout Shako ! For two refs !"

The guards looked at each other, then whispered to each other. "Do you think he's one of them ?" Asked the first one.

"I don't know, but it's entirely possible." Answered the second one.

The guards turned back to the joyful stallion, and pointed their spears at him. "Mister," said the guard who spoke earlier, "please follow us, we have questions to-"

CHTONG

"NO !" Angrily spat the stallion after ruining a perfect helmet with a whack of his pan, knocking the guard out. "STOUT SHAKO FOR TWO REFINED !"

Princess Celestia was cautious these days. Multiple pony shaped beings had attacked Ponyville during the last week. She couldn't let her guard down. So she was prepared for the worst, as a guard who obviously didn't value his helmet that much arrived panting at the throne room. "Princess ... main gate ... pan ... pony ... helmet ... help ..." said the guard before collapsing on the royal floor.

She couldn't make much of it, except that many ponies needed help at the main entrance of Canterlot. Since the captain of the guards wasn't here, she had to take care of everything by herself, leaving the royal court to Luna. Which wasn't so bad after all.

She could've teleported there, but she had to know what she was facing. She didn't even fetch a carriage : she just flew to the gate, to discover the most ridiculous massacre of all times.

Her guards were decimated, falling one by one under the terrifying weapon, brutally held by the most extravagant stallion she had seen in a long while : the pan. It broke helmet after helmet, resulting into a soon-to-be helmet crisis.

She watched in annoyance, until the mysterious stallion knocked on a door. The civilians didn't have any head protection. She couldn't let their soft skulls have a misfortunate encounter with the pan. Soon, an alarm, telling everypony that they had to barricade their doors and never open them until further notice, rang loudly across the city.

Celestia landed right behind the brown coated stallion. He noticed it, and immediately turned around, his smile never leaving his face. He presented his weapon, and a tall, red hat appeared once again. "Stout Shako !" He declared, ready to make a fine trade. "For two refined !"

This was bad. From what Celestia saw, declining the exchange would result in problematic consequences. And she couldn't use her magic there, as several houses and unconscious guards surrounded her. She would have to improvise. "I accept." She said to buy time.

The stallion adjusted his shades, and his grin grew bigger, enough to put Pinkie Pie to shame. "Yes !" He briefly said, showing a hoof to receive his part of the trade.

"Unfortunately, I am not in possession of two 'refined'." Calmly stated Celestia, ready to face the consequences. At least, everypony in town would've closed their doors by now. She simply waited for the pan to strike.

Instead, he kept smiling, as he surprisingly said something different than his signature catchphrase. "Ah, no problems, lad !" He happily declared. "Jus' craft some scrap ! Ye surely have some, dinnae ye ?"

"Scrap." Repeated Celestia. Scrap ? What could scrap mean ? Scrap ... scrapped ... metal ! This pony wanted scrapped metal ? Who was she to refuse such a simple request to save some skulls ? But to have scrapped metal, she needed metal. She quickly scanned the area, and picked helmets up from the guards' heads. She handed them to the stallion, who seemingly crushed them under his hooves. Did he trick her ?

No. It was there. As he removed his hooves from the ground, she could see that two pieces of complicated iron pieces were on the ground. "There ya go !" He said, handing the hat to Celestia. She decided to wear it, hoping it would make him leave. Unfortunately, he crushed the newly made pieces of refined metal together, making yet another one of his Faust damned hat.

Celestia frowned. She had an idea of what was about to happen. The stallion put the hat in his pan, and turned once again to face the Princess of the Sun. "Stout Shako !" He inevitably said. "For two refined !"

That was it. The last straw had been pulled. Celestia removed all of her jewelry, and levitated it towards the castle. The stallion took the bait, and galloped after the flying pieces of metal. After a long pursuit, which lead him inside the castle, the golden jewelry fell inside a dark cell. He walked forward, and it closed right behind him.

Inside, he heard a familiar voice. "She's got ya too, didn't she, mate ?" The voice chuckled. "Don't worry. I made plan with the mental defective that can be called my cellmate."