Of All The Small Things
By Johanson
This morning, like any other morning, started with her mother’s calming voice stirring her awake. The small filly yawned as she lifted up her head and opened her eyes to see nothing. She could feel that it was dark, but nevertheless she systematically pulled herself out of bed. Her hooves lightly clacked against the smooth floor, so soft only she could hear them. Up ahead she could sense light, and she walked toward it with a hopeful smile.
Only to hit against the side of a wall.
Just one of many things Snowdrop couldn’t see.
“Oh, silly me,” she kidded, feeling the wall. “I was just off by a little bit today.”
As usual... her own internal voice said. Nevertheless, she quickly shook it off.
After locating the doorway, she passed through it and into the living room. Snowdrop could always tell it was the living room because she could sense the couch to her right and from there she could hear all the noises and catch all the smells coming from the kitchen. It wasn’t much, her mother always said, but it was still their home. Memorized, she stopped about six steps away from the couch and leaned her head forward. The kitchen sounds and smells grew immensely.
“Morning Mommy!” she said with a little bit of forced cheer. Her mother happily replied to her with a similar greeting.
“And how’s my little angel this morning?” her mother added in a singsong tone.
“Good,” she said. The butterflies in her stomach disagreed, but she didn’t want to mention it. She wanted to keep herself sharp for everypony else and ready for the day to come.
With the ritual done, Snowdrop moved forward and held out her hoof until she felt it hit wood. Groping at it, she pulled the chair towards her and sat up on it. In a matter of moments, she heard the clink of porcelain on wood, followed by the gentle caress of her mother’s head. Snowdrop cracked a smile and giggled, letting her mother’s simple, quick touch fade away.
Right then the strong scent of salted fried eggs and buttered toast filled her nostrils. They also tasted as equally scrumptious, both very warm and crunchy. She washed them both down with a light glass of silky milk. Snowdrop always enjoyed milk, especially since it was so creamy and yet not too sweet.
Finished, Snowdrop scooted forward and landed on the ground. Depending once more upon memorization, she moved forward, her right hoof groping for the edge of the kitchen doorway. Feeling it, she then turned to the left and continued onwards, all the while saying, “Well, I’ll go and get some work done.”
Snowdrop wondered if her mother could sense the sudden anxiety in her voice.
She continued for about fifteen steps when her hooves fell onto a soft, fluffy pad. She sighed and then felt to her right until her hoof dinged against a wooden block-like object. Feeling over it, her hooves rested on the lid. A sudden burst of chill air tingled her fur as she opened it, dug in, and picked out a small, flake-like object.
Ice, she said to herself. The chest itself was a gift, enhanced with magic to be as cool as the cold northern mountains.
She then felt around till her hoof came across soft bristles. She smiled and said, “There you are.” This was her tool, one she used diligently. It was her scepter, her trademark, and to Snowdrop, her cutie mark. Or at least imagined what it could be when that special day came.
But she sighed and bent down, letting the feather brush her nose like a set of tiny, strong grass leaves. Despite the fact that she had been offered a wide variety of tools to utilize in her work, she preferred using a simple feather. It was natural to use, she happily insisted back then. However, certain individuals didn’t want her to pick out all her feathers, so they gave her something stronger and rarer, something more meaningful. Like a phoenix feather.
Picking it up with her teeth, she held the piece of ice flake in between her hooves and began etching into it, using tiny, highly articulated movements. Snowdrop always had to be extra careful with the flakes. Not having the same luck as her first one, almost every other attempt at creating a snowflake resulted in nothing but broken pieces of ice. Unlike many other ponies who could visualize the snowflake patterns, Snowdrop had nothing to go off of save for bits she had been told from others. It was an incredibly frustrating process for her, one that required absolute precision and concentration. A job that even those who could see would have trouble doing.
She had tried many times before to contemplate on the thought of seeing things. It all seemed foreign to her and yet so fascinating. To be able to see shapes and colors; to see the texture on a bird’s wings and the style of a dress, or to get lost in staring at a picture and even just the world itself. She could do that. Get lost in the world, with all of its lovely sounds and smells and texture. But just to be able to see it all.
Just to be able to see at all…
But whenever she thought about these things, she always remembered what her mother had said many years ago within the crisp darkness of a special snow-laden night. No, not you. You’re too special for that.
And she was right. Her daily struggles now were a far cry from what they used to be, and for once she found something that she could do right. That night seemed like ages ago, but she had so much to be thankful for. Yet it also made it her think: what would it be like to have sight?
The question felt like a stumbling block to her that followed her every time she let her mind run free. How much better would have everyone treated her before? What more could she accomplish with sight? Would she have just continued living a normal life like everyone else? Would she have been able to fulfill her destiny still? And even then, would have anypony cared?
Would the snowflake have even existed?
In a single slip, she heard a soft crack. Snowdrop bit down on her feather and sighed heavily.
“Oh drat, not another one!” she mumbled. With hasty tenderness she took up another piece of snow and began working on it, but the question still bothered her. Snowdrop never liked to play the ‘what if’ game all the time with herself yet some things still made her think. Certainly others have thought about it too.
Time floated on by before Snowdrop heard a knock at the door. A sweet, familiar voice called out a short distance from her. “Don’t worry about it, Snowdrop. I’ll get it.”
It was her mother. She heard her walk toward the source of the knocking and open it up. And then a gasp came out of her mother’s voice, followed by her immediately announcing, “Your highness!”
Snowdrop quickly finished her last etch in the snowflake before dropping the feather. She twisted around and began running dead-on towards the light source. She slowed herself to a stop next to where she thought her mother was and stared up. She didn’t really know how tall they were, despite the efforts of her peers. However, she didn’t need to be told how elegant they were. She could sense the beauty and grace that ebbed from them. The air felt like it trembled slightly as though all the particles in the air humbly acknowledged the Regal Sister’s presence. Only her tiny voice softened it. “Hello there, Princess Luna.”
The princess’s smooth voice hit the pegasus filly’s ears. “Greetings Ms. Primrose, and especially to you too, Snowdrop. Apologies on the intrusion, but we thought it would be best if we ensured that Snowdrop would make it on time. Are you ready for today?”
Snowdrop froze. She at once wanted to slap herself silly. She had known this day was coming. Even back then, she had wanted to delight in it, but her dread had always seized her instead. Now that it had arrived, it weighed heavily on her. Today was extra, extra important and here she was, unprepared, in the presence of a princess! Her head sank down as she fought for words.
“I… Uh…”
“Is everything all right?” asked the princess. Snowdrop quickly lifted her head once more and shook it enthusiastically. “No, I’m fine.”
The princess paused for a moment. “Well then, shall we see thine work?”
Snowdrop nodded a bit too frantically. “Certainly, right this way,” she stammered before tripping on her own legs and falling down. Primrose quickly picked her up, but Snowdrop shrugged her off and continued onward back to the room.
Once there, Snowdrop felt around till she bumped into a cylindrical ceramic pot. In a panicked frenzy she threw out her tiny hooves around the large pot. Precariously it rocked back and forth until finally it came to a standstill. Snowdrop let out an easy sigh. That was a close one.
Holding its sides, she then tried grabbing the lid with her teeth.
Before she could though, the vase suddenly slipped up and out of her hooves.
The blind filly’s heart stopped. She gritted her teeth and prepared herself for the inevitable crash.
When it did not come, she craned her head out of befuddlement. “Fear not,” said the Princess of the Night. “The vase is within my magical grasp.” Snowdrop breathed easy once more, until Luna spoke again.
“Now, let us see what you have made.”
With a whir, Snowdrop heard all of the snowflakes in the vase shuffle out like cards and twist around the room. They flew past her face in single file lines before halting to a stop at the command of the princess. Princess Luna elicited a small cry of wonder. “Snowdrop, thine work is most astonishing!”
“No, they’re not that good really,” the filly responded.
Her mother’s voice came in next. “Snowdrop, that’s nonsense! They’re beautiful! Like this one!”
“No, they’re not. They’re all not good enough. Especially that one!” Snowdrop was certain that both mares were exchanging apprehensive glances, as they should have. There were at least over two hundred snowflakes in that jar, each one totally different. But none of them felt ‘right’ and she knew that there had, nay, needed to be a perfect one for today.
Suddenly there was another great shuffling, followed by a lid closing.
“This one will suffice,” Luna said absentmindedly as she walked beside Snowdrop. “Your perfect snowflake will wait another time.”
The blind filly weakly agreed, though her heart was frightened.
“We best get moving, little one. I must warn you, it will be bitter cold out there.”
“Don’t worry about that,” said Primrose as they walked towards the front door. A moment later Snowdrop felt the rough cloth of her cloak drape across her body. She instantly smiled and hugged her mother warmly. For a moment, her worry and anxiety melted away, flushed away by tender love and compassion. And somehow, she imagined that the princess too was smiling.
The two finally parted, and Snowdrop followed the princess as they headed out across the clouds. She wished the warmth from her mother’s hug would weather the cold. And yet she doubted it would.
……………………………………………………………………………………………………….
The light of the sun shone weakly as Snowdrop tried imagining the now dense cloudy skies of Cloudsdale. She didn’t know exactly where they were going, but she knew what they were doing. It was going to be one of the most memorable moments for everypony.
Today was the first winter’s snowfall. The first Winter Celebration.
For years the pegasai had always controlled it, but never with care. It was just another thing they had to do as a part of their weather jobs for those who worked at the factories. Though for the sake of pure survival, truly it was a burden on all of ponykind, especially the pegasai who stood high in the clouds, every day dwelling with the source of harsh cold and chilling nights that made their bones dance in shivers. Kids and adults alike hated winter. If not for the balance of order, surely they would have thrown away their duties and let them plummet to the ground like the very creations of Cloudsdale always did.
And here was this blind filly who said that winter was not only beautiful, but kind. That it was meaningful and joyous? And that everyone should wish upon the snow like frosty stars? Ridiculous, they said! Even now, Snowdrop could feel the harsh energy that some ponies gave her as she trotted by them. In spite of her moving speech that day a year ago, some ponies still treated her as though she were brainless and a foolish little filly. They didn’t always say it to her directly, but on some days they couldn’t help but make snide, harsh-sounding remarks that cut deep into her. Today was going to be no exception, and she had come to expect it even more so this morning. Fortunately, Princess Luna was directly beside her, warding off the hopes of any ill-wishers. She was good at that. Protecting her ponies.
But last Spring she wouldn’t have thought that true. She still remembered how Luna had approached her during the Spring Celebration ceremonies. In that moment it felt hard being in front of her, the famed princess of the night. Everypony always imagined her as a hard, cold character who preferred the loneliness over ponies, much like her nights. From what they had told her, Luna looked the part too, from her height and build to her deep blue coat and a flowing mane and tail as deep as space.
Soon after the princesses approached her with the idea of a new idea: a winter celebration. Just the notion of it sounded too unreal to the simple blind filly. Were the Royal Sisters really wanting to celebrate the one thing that everypony hated? It appeared so as they continually insisted upon working together to make it happen. At first they, including her mother, met to talk about the winter snowfall, but soon the night shifts Primrose worked took a toll on her and Princess Celestia’s schedule grew hectic in preparation for the Summer Sun Celebration, leaving just Snowdrop and Princess Luna to work on it.
Snowdrop dreaded the first meeting she had with Princess Luna. The few ponies who knew about the meetings feared for her. Luna was indeed the most reclusive of the Royal Sisters and stories circulated about how she was a vampire, or how she used to steal fillies in the dark of the night for her nefarious purposes. But what worried her the most was just the uncertainty of it all. Here was a blind, awkward filly with her soft and gentle idea who was about to be in the presence of an all-powerful, benevolent princess that ruled the cold darkness of the night.
When they came together, silence ruled over the isolated cloud they sat on that brisk spring afternoon. Snowdrop couldn’t think of anything to say, and for the moment, she wished she could just run back home. Any confidence she had about her snowflakes, about her hopes, and her dreams were worn dry in a manner of seconds.
Then a voice broke the silence. But it wasn’t that of Princess Luna, the caretaker of the heavenly nights with all the rightfully-earned power and stature. Rather, a sullen and smooth voice. “Before we go on, we, no I, must sayest thou little one that you are most brave and… hopeful. You have truly earned our respect. My respect.”
Snowdrop smiled as she reminisced the joyous relief that came upon hearing Luna’s voice.
As time progressed often times the princess was so busy that she wouldn’t be able to visit her, but she did when she could. After a while they started to talk about each other. Snowdrop talked about her days at school and what snowflakes she had made, while Luna spoke of how peaceful it was when she was working on the stars, and what she designed for that night. After a while she also admitted how she felt worried trying to talk to the small filly that could only see her for what she was. But that was in the past, she’d say, and now she considered her a good friend.
Sometimes even, the princess would take her to places, guiding the blind filly the whole way. Luna would always describe the scenery to her, things that she could all but see. Things like the busy streets of Canterlot, or the green trees of the Everfree, or the scope of the whole kingdom from atop a mountain. “Beautiful things,” Luna would always say.
Those thoughts quickly dispersed as Snowdrop ran into an outstretched leg. “Watch your step, little one,” said Princess Luna.
The filly thanked her royal majesty and started moving again, this time far more cautiously. Somewhere nearby the voices of two stallions yelled and scolded nearby bystanders over the sounds of clashing hammers. Quickly the ruckus was drowned out by the noises of city life. She could hear the Pegasai as they moved to and fro, each in their own little world apart from the one the princess and the filly inhabited.
“We must ask ye, little Snowdrop,” started the princess. “But did thou enjoy last night?”
“Yes, last night was really good.”
“Really? Surely you jest!” the night princess said apprehensively.
“No, I mean it, really!”
Snowdrop smiled as she thought back to the previous night. Despite the deepest chills of fall raging on outside, she did in fact go outside. She always did so every night, whether her mother was with her or not. It was almost her favorite tradition and sometimes the filly wouldn’t even be able to rest easy unless she had at least for a little bit stood outside and gazed up at the twinkling stars. Of course on some nights it would be rainy or cloudy just like last night, but unlike everypony else, Snowdrop didn’t mind. She knew the stars were still up there, hiding above their blanket in the sky.
Soon the city noise started to fade away, leaving only the clopping of hooves against the clouds and the flapping of wings. Nearby birds chirped. Several ponies chatted gingerly, while a mare beside Snowdrop hummed a lovely tune.
Before the filly even knew it, she was copying the mare. Quickly Luna began to giggle, while the other mare stopped humming out of surprise. And then she picked up on it once more, leading the tune for Snowdrop.
This continued on for a while, but like all things, soon the other mare’s humming stopped and Snowdrop presumed she finally went on her way. Snowdrop frowned, but still kept on plodding along next to the princess. It wasn’t the first time somepony had left her side without saying goodbye.
But as she kept on walking, she wondered if that would continue for her. For ponies to just simply be there for her one moment, and then just... walk away. Most ponies seemed to do that to her, despite what she had made. It made her wonder. Even with the snowflake, what difference would it make on her? And what difference really would her snowflake make? Would the ponies down below love them, or treat them the same way she’d been treated all her life?
“Princess Luna?”
The princess halted to a stop. “What’s wrong, little one? Are thou upset over that mare’s leave?”
“No, it’s not that. I just…” Snowdrop took a moment to suck in some air. The butterflies had now turned violent in her chest.
“Why do you always make stars?”
“Pardon me?”
“Why do you always make the stars? I know you rule over the night, but why do you keep on making them? Why do you spend so much time on them, putting them up in the sky when no one cares to see them? Doesn’t it… bother you?”
Luna sat still for a while, standing above the tiny blind filly. Snowdrop knew that they were alone, with nopony to hear them. The clouds felt thinner, like they were at the edge of one of them. Ahead of her she could still sense the sun’s dulled glow. The princess finally took in a deep breath, as her tone had dropped down from its normal elegance and formality. Something she only had done in private.
“I make the stars because they’re mine, Snowdrop. You see, a long time ago there were no stars. Except for the moon, there was nothing out there for the ponies to enjoy save for just the darkness of the night. My sister had this problem with her sun, but none of the ponies seemed to mind.
At night though, the darkness scared a lot of the ponies. It was threatening and reminded them of many bad things. They needed something more. But I thought of something special for them. As I looked up above into the moon’s glow, I thought of something to accompany it. I thought of something bright and hopeful. Something… small.”
“Why did it have to be small though? Couldn’t you have made another moon?”
“No, I couldn’t have. Because you see, the stars are like all of us. When we wish upon them, we’re wishing upon ourselves. Regardless of what anyone tells you and what differences you perceive, we’re all the same. Each of us depend upon each other to light up the sky, because without one another we would just be as lonely as the moon. And most of all, each of us has a special light, one that can be seen by all.”
Snowdrop looked down, her teeth biting down hard. “But does anyone ever see them? What if… no pony still cares?”
Luna once more stood in silence, her mind contemplating on what had just been said. Snowdrop was certain that she was frowning by now. She could certainly tell as the moments dragged on. For that moment, the ceremony and the city and the entire nation seemed to fade away, with existence focusing only on the tiny conversation of an alicorn monarch and a simple blind filly.
Finally, the princess sighed and spoke. “I still would have made them.”
“But why?” asked the filly.
“Because I enjoy them. Often times we are judged by our works and our actions. What we create is supposed to represent not just our creative ability, but also who we are. When I created the stars, I wanted something that represents all of ponydom. I did it not out of spite or need, but from a desire to help my little ponies. I wanted them to have something to wish on. A beacon of hope in the night. Even if they didn’t understand why I made them I would rest in confidence knowing that at least they were there. Someone may come along and downplay their worth and...”
Luna paused for a moment, sucking in a strained breath.
“And my own, but surely they’re still valuable. No one can take away that.”
Snowdrop drew upon the silence. Luna’s words struck hard on her heart and suddenly the butterflies began to uneasily settle. She turned her head to the left and looked up. “What about my snowflakes? Do you think anypony would care to see them?”
Luna’s voice only lifted up a little as she let out a small laugh. “Of course they will. Every time I look at your snowflakes I see you, Snowdrop… Just like my stars, they’re beautiful, unique, and complete.”
And with that, the filly stepped forward and warmly nuzzled her head against Princess Luna.
“Thank you,” she uttered.
The princess remained still. As Snowdrop held her close, she could sense so much in her: sorrow, confusion, self-doubt. Everything that had haunted herself. She then knew why she mattered to the princess, and she felt Luna’s struggle.
Yet there was something else she could sense in her, something sharp and cold and… bitter. As Snowdrop could feel the alicorn’s head brush against her own, but it was callous and unempathic, as if Luna’s mind was still miles away. Snowdrop couldn’t bear it.
“Are you going to be okay, Luna?” she asked.
Luna simply uttered out, “I hope so, yes. You shouldn’t worry about me, little one. You only need to worry about your snowflakes. I will be fine.”
At once Snowdrop could feel all of the despair Luna had disappear, as if it had retreated into the innermost parts of her heart. The elegance and grace she had only moments before now regained its throne in the alicorn’s heart. Once more, the princess Snowdrop knew had returned.
She hoped it would stay that way.
“Now then, let us go on,” announced Luna. “We cannot be late.”
………………………………………………………………………...................................
A volley of chattering rang in Snowdrop’s ears as they neared the site of the ceremony. A great breeze blasted at her, injecting chills into her little body.
“Make way, my loyal subjects!” Luna shouted. A great shuffling of hooves followed in response. Shifting through the crowd, Snowdrop gripped Luna’s leg tightly. Most of the voices that once chatted wildly were silent, but even amid them Snowdrop could hear a few hushed voices.
“Both of the princesses are present in Cloudsdale today? Just for the winter’s first snowfall?”
“Who’s that little filly she’s with? The princess doesn’t have a daughter?”
“Is that the blind filly who’s responsible for this year’s winter snowfall? What was her name? Plow Dew?”
Princess Luna seemed to keep quiet as she went, so Snowdrop just followed suit and kept on trotting close to the princess. Soon the presence of the crowd dissipated into an opening. In front of her a majestic voice greeted her.
“Greetings, my little pony,” the voice said. She knew instantly it was Celestia’s. “Are you ready to begin the first snowfall?”
Everything suddenly grew still for Snowdrop. She could sense everypony watching her, some with smiles on their faces, others with scorn. Just knowing they were all there made chills run up her fur so fast she clutched her cloak. But this time she didn’t feel afraid or anxious. Instead, she felt proud, something she hadn’t felt since the first snowflake.
Looking up, Snowdrop nodded to the princesses. Celestia at once walked forward and began speaking.
“Fillies and gentlecolts, today we gather here to celebrate nothing spectacular.”
A flurry of questions and grunts poured out of the crowd before drawing upon silence once more.
“Snowfalls are nothing new to us. For years snow and ice have flowed in and out of these very clouds. No pony here is unfamiliar to the cold of winter and many of us here today have had a hoof in it. Snowfall, like rain showers or the running of leaves, is a simple part of our lives.
Yet rarely do we take a moment to think about what we make here and what it means, which is why this year we are adding the snowflake. To show us winter not just as a time of relief for the soil down below, but as a time of soft stillness. A time to quiet our minds and reflect on the fragility of life. Rarely do we enjoy such a period of peace and beauty in our busy, complex lives. And sometimes it takes something simple to remind us how to appreciate these unique qualities.
Without more to be said, let the first snowfall of winter commence!”
Magic hummed nearby as a soft snowflake landed in Snowdrop’s hooves. Luna’s voice accompanied it.
“Go on, Snowdrop. Let it go.”
She did just that.
A moment later, a roar of cheer burst through the clouds. It was almost overwhelming to the filly. So much love and joy was coming out of the one thing she created. The one thing she did right. It felt like as if everypony were joined with her in heart just like on the day when she first showed off her silly idea. She could feel both the alicorn sisters smile as they stood by her. From one of them Snowdrop sensed a tear fall past her and slap onto the clouds underneath. It was filled with an angry mixture of sorrow and joy.
At that moment, she felt a whimsical sensation rivet her body. The sound of a distinct whir resounded in her ear, ones Snowdrop had never heard before. In a matter of seconds, it was gone. Luna’s voice cracked with emotion behind her.
“Snowdrop… your cutie mark!”
“Oh, my little precious! It’s beautiful!” another distinct voice chirped nearby. She recognized her mother’s voice.
Yet Snowdrop did not move or turn around. Her mind wasn’t on the excitement of her destiny being fulfilled, nor her talent being discovered. She couldn’t care to think about what her mark even looked like, one that she will never be able to see. Her mind was at peace and her heart was warm with joy and happiness. For Snowdrop, the moment was overflowing with so much emotion that all she could do was stare at awe and reflect. Every step, every challenge, and every doubt she had experienced up until this moment now culminated to this shining moment. One now should could enjoy in jubilation with so many others.
And yet under it all, she could hear the simple twinkling of the snowflakes as they made their journey down to the ground.
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Author's Note
Please feel free to comment about the story. Don't forget to give it a thumbs up and favorite!
I would like to thank my team of proofreaders and editors, including the illustrious keaton-furman-prower, the wondrous epona92, the mysterious A Fluffed Pillow, and Majikdrag0n.
Snowdrop belongs to SillyFillyStudios and MLP:FiM belongs to Hasbro.
