A Whimper in the Darkness

by Rysonn

Rating: teen
Tags: Princess Celestia, Twilight Sparkle, Sad, Princess Luna, Gore, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark
Length: 1136

This is a grimdark story following the story of Twilight as she tries to cofess her love to Luna.

I wrote this story nearly six months ago. A friend of mine on dA pushed me into writing a shipping story, and so i started one. Half way through, i got some... pretty bad news about one of my friends, and it all went wrong. At that point, the whole story went to hell, and so i revised the beginning, and threw it online. A few people liked it, to my surprise, and so i'll put it here.

Again, bear in mind that this was written almost six months ago, and is awfully written, even compared to my works.(the more recent ones, at the least). However, even though I've already improved a bunch, i'd like to hear your opinion on both the story and the writing.

Oh, and i know, it's really short, that's how i used to work, and still do, to some extent. Also, don't comment on the contradiction to the title at the end, please. I've known of it all along, i was just too lazy to find another title.

Published 2012-03-14 03:04:02 UTC
Last updated 2012-03-14 03:04:02 UTC

Chapter 1

Twilight had always done her very best to support Luna. Celestia hadn't been unjust to her recently, or on purpose. Yet, Luna had spent a thousand long years of her unending life alone on the moon. It had pushed her too far.

Twilight had always felt strongly for Luna, but had never found the ability in her heart to confront Luna about how she really felt. now it was too late.

Twilight walked solely down the greet hall of Canterlot Castle. Ahe still felt bad about the incident at the Gala, and felt a need to apologize, even if it had been a full month since that night.

She knocked on the large wooden door, and after a short wait a purple veil of light enveloped the door and it swung open. There lay Princess Celestia, a levitating book before her.

"Twilight, what brings you to Canterlot?" Celestia inquired in that semi-enthusiastic voice of hers.

"P-Princess Celestia, I just came to apologize for all that happened at the Gala..." she responded, hanging her head before her beloved teacher, and Princess of all the land.

"Twilight Sparkle, I already told you not to fret about that little episode. Now I know that isn't the sole reason for your coming all the way here from Ponyville."

Twilight felt a slight blush spread across her cheeks as she responded to the comment. "Is Luna in?" she asked a little shyness detectable in her voice.

A slight smile spread across Celestia's face. "Her living quarters are located on the lower floor of the castle. She will be happy to know that she has a visitor." Celestia replied, seeing the emotion hidden behind Twilights eyes.

Twilight bowed to her Princess. "Thank you, Princess Celestia."

"Think nothing of it." was the sun godesses only response as she returned to her book.

Twilight rose, and backed out the doorway slowly. She trotted down the hall, and heard the click of the large doors latch behind her as it closed shut.

She proceeded down the red velvet staircase, and down another hallway. The carpet abruptly ended, revealing the cold stone floor beneath it. The lighting too began to grow less, the electric lighting replaced with flame-lit torches. She went on.

She finally arrived at a smaller doorway than the previous one. Twilight knocked on the wooden door. She then found that the door was slightly ajar, and it swung open from the pressure of her hoof on the wood.

The princess of the night stood directly opposite her, facing away, staring out a small window. She was still unaware of Twilights presence. A little embarrassed by her own intrusion, she spoke up shyly.

"E-Excuse me, am I interposing in any way?"

Luna turned slowly to face her. Twilight then noticed the tears that were streaming down her princess's face. However, Luna made no attempt to hide them, she just seemed to ignore their very presence.

"No, not at all. I'm delighted you decided to stop by." Luna replied. Twilight knew Luna was upset, but the princess did not show it in her voice.

"I-I was just wondering how you were. I was in Canterlot anyway, so I thought it only proper to visit you."

"Well I’m honored that you thought of me. In response to your statement, I am fine, and how have you been as of late?" she questioned, sounding as slightly dominant in her speech.

"I'm doing alright thanks. Still a little embarrassed about the Gala though..." she tried to stop there but found she couldn't subdue her curiosity any longer. "Luna, a-are you sure you’re okay?"

"Now Twilight, you have better things to do than worry about me. Now you'd better be going. It'll be nightfall soon, and I’m sure that the ponies of Ponyville are worried about you." she said, slightly commandingly.

Twilight, now feeling slightly unwelcome, gave into pressure and took Luna's advice.

"A-alright... It was nice seeing you again!" she exclaimed, trying her best not to sound overly-disappointed. She bowed her head to the princess of the night and retreated out the door.

She began to walk away, but began to hear light sobs coming from the small room she'd left behind. She wanted to go help, to go comfort Luna, but she couldn’t bring herself to reverse her movement. Instead she ran down the narrow path, afraid to confront her secret crush about what troubled her.

She galloped down the hallway, and up the flight of stairs. Her horn began to crystallize the light that rippled around it, and in a split second she disappeared in a flash of light, and reappeared at the entrance of the library.

For the next three days all she could think about was princess Luna. The tears, and the sobs haunted her at night, and finally she couldn't contain emotion.

She lay in bed, unable to suppress the tears that so openly desired to be brought forth in a tidal wave of emotion. What started as tears, began to evolve into sobs, deep sobs, sobs of pure, psychological pain. She couldn't take it any more.

Twilight leaped out of her bed, her form dissipating in a bright flash of light. The particles of her body recondensed and linked together in the main hall of the castle.

Twilight vaulted the flight of stairs, and hit the ground dashing into a full-body sprint to the other end of the hall. She was suddenly overwhelmed by a deep fragrance. It wasn’t a pleasant odor, but it wasn't necessarily dour either.

Twilight possessed the wooden door with her magical force, and pushed it open. She found Luna, drenched in an oddly coloured liquid, and levitating a box of matches in front of her.

"L-Luna, what’s going on, what are you doing?!" Twilight spat hastily, worried for the sake of herself, and her secret love.

Luna drew a match from the box. "Goodbye, Twilight... I'm sorry..." With that she placed the match into her mouth, and struck it against the box.

A tiny flame sparked to life in the end of the match. Luna dropped the match into one of her hooves, and the liquid that coated the surface of her body ignited in a brilliant flame, and engulfed the princess of darkness.

Luna didn't scream, she didn't sob, she didn't even whimper. She just let the tears roll down her face.

A tiny smile spread across Luna’s face, as she collapsed to the cold stone floor, little tongues of flame still lurking on her coat.

The tears welling in Twilights eyes finally erupted into a river of pain and sorrow. She tried to do something, anything, but found herself immobile. All she could do was stay and watch the flames slowly burn away the remains of the princess she loved.