Celestia was bruised and dirty. When she came back to Canterlot, finally released from Discord’s vines, she had rushed to her private sanctuary. The castle’s staff tried to stop her, claiming she needed mending, cleaning and a meal before doing anything else, and by anything else, she knew it meant the paperwork that no doubt piled up while she was gone. She would be the first to admit it had been a painful experience, crushed by the razor-edged thorns for over a day.
Right now, she couldn’t care less how she looked. The recollection of the events as narrated by Twilight and her friends had kindled a deep fear in her heart. She had listened to their points of view of the story with a stoic face. Centuries in the political sphere had given her an unbeatable talent at hiding her true feelings.
She ordered the guards to not disturb her under any circumstances, then closed and locked the heavy red wooden doors on their concerned faces. They were entrusted with the Princess’ protection, and just a short while ago they had failed to prevent her abduction. In that particular situation, she doubted they could have done anything. However, at this very moment, Celestia didn’t care about their wounded pride.
She walked up to the middle of the room, trying to ready herself for what she decided had to be done. She took a deep breath and let it go slowly. Then another, and another. She loathed every encounter she had with him. He had a way of forcing the worst of her to surface, but right now she believed she had no alternative. She fired up her aura, automatically answered by a golden glow along her horn. She shaped that familiar magic into the structure of a rather complex spell; the same she taught Twilight a while ago.
Determined to go forward with it, she didn’t give herself any time to change her mind and let the spell pulse outward. Almost immediately a dining table - floating upside-down in mid air -, a small wooden chair - with only one leg - and its owner appeared in the middle of the room. He was about to take a bite at what appeared to be paint of different colors… with a fork. Maybe an allegory about eating one’s own emotions; the Princess had given up trying to give him meaning a long time ago. The spell had obviously interrupted him in his motion, and as soon as he spotted the solar Princess, he dropped his fork on the table. It got up and walked to the others utensils who were playing some kind of card game around a tiny table. Celestia wasn’t surprised in the slightest to see the silverware had a life on its own. He hammered the table with his right claw.
“This is getting ridiculous,” he groused. Celestia couldn’t say if he was angry or amused. “No pony has the decency of knocking before teleporting me around.”
“I wouldn’t do it if I had any other choice,” the alicorn replied without trace of any emotion.
He snapped his claw and in a flash his furniture disappeared, leaving him floating, his face too close to Celestia’s for her own comfort. “That’s just it! When you do have a choice, you should sometimes pick the silliest one!”
“Discord,” she warned him.
“When was the last time you let go of your duty! My little pony, let me say it plainly: You. Are. Boring!” he said while floating away with that large smile she hated so much about him. “You should take an example from the pink one. At least she does know to have some fun.”
“Discord, I need to know,” Celestia started, but was once again interrupted by her guest blowing a raspberry.
“You’re so predictable!” he said while trying to move the corners of Celestia’s mouth up to make her smile, but since he was upside down at the moment, it gave the opposite result. “There, better!” he claimed while looking at her as if it was piece of art.
With great restraint, she managed not to sigh loudly. “I apologize that I disturbed you while you were eating, but I need to know,” she tried to say, but was interrupted once more.
“Yeah, yeah,” he said while rolling his eyes, literally, out of their sockets. “With the Elements back in the bush, you want to know if I won’t go on some blitz of chaotic…”
“No,” she claimed calmly. For once, she was happy to have interrupted him. She sat down, happy to see he had been rendered speechless, for however long it might last.
“No?” he finally asked.
“No,“ she answered, unable to keep her lips from forming a smile of satisfaction. Watching Discord - the avatar of confusion incarnate - struggle with confusion himself was a delightful change of pace. She let it linger for a minute before continuing. “One day, no doubt, I would like to know what your plans for the future are, but...” she began.
“Do I look like one to have a plan?” he asked, his skin suddenly painted as a clown, a ball spinning on his nose.
“Yes,” Celestia replied without an ounce of doubt.
“Spoilsport,” he whispered.
“I want to know what happened; what Twilight saw,” she explained.
“Oh!” he exclaimed, finally understanding. “You should have seen that! She went all wooo! Wooo!” he laughed as a beam of light flashed from his eyes and his ears, as if his head was a lighthouse.
Celestia didn’t say anything and simply let him finished his imitation of Twilight Sparkle.
“You see, there was this zebra who came up and claimed to have a potion that reacted to alicorn magic and would allow whoever drink it to observe past events!” he explained and finished by hitting his knee with his paw. He could hardly keep himself from laughing.
Celestia frowned at the information. “Does such a thing really exist?”
"The potion, or alicorn magic?” he asked while standing on the tip of his tail.
“Well… both,” she replied.
“Don’t ask me why, but for some reason your protegé believed ‘alicorn magic’ meant ‘dark magic’!” he said as black and green bubbles of dark pulsing magic covered his body. He took a deep breath and inhaled all the darkness. He burped a large black sphere which he popped with his claw.
“How strange… Any unicorn trained to it can cast dark magic. It’s just not public knowledge as it tends to take root in some vile emotions,” Celestia thought out loud. “So, the potion didn’t work?”
“Absolutely not!” he yelled, followed by a burst of laughing. “How would such potion work? Over the span of millenniums, across all time and space, how would a potion make you see exactly where and when you want… no, no, no… not want. Where and when you need to see?!”
Celestia took a moment to digest the revelation. “So, you showed her some events?”
“You were so heroic!” he said while flying in circle, a small figurine depicting Nightmare Moon had joined him and was chasing him around the room, firing tiny bursts of purple magic. “And one of these days... POW! Right in the kisser!” When he reached the middle of the room, one beam of magic hit him and he fell to the ground, holding his chest. For a while, he stayed there, laying on the floor. Celestia raised an eyebrow at his depiction of her fight against her sister. He slowly stood up on some shaking hooves. “And then, bang! zoom! Straight to the moon!” On that, a small beam of chromatic color enveloped the Nightmare figurine and it was sent straight up and crashed in a painting of the moon that was part of her vaulted ceiling.
“That’s all?” she asked calmly. Things may not had been as bad as she first thought.
“Oh Celestia!” he said in a fake exasperation. “You should know better. I have the power to travel anywhere in time!” On that statement, a dozen Discords appeared around the room, each in different ages. The closest to her was an infant in diapers. “I could very well go back in time and prevent you from turning me into stone,” the baby said. “However, I know better!” the oldest one, standing with the help of a strange golden cane, continued as he walked slowly towards her. For a moment, Celestia could swear the cane’s top was a caricature of her student. “Time is pure chaos, and any time travel performed in the goal of changing events goes against my very being!”
“Really?” replied a skeptic Celestia. “Is it not because you’re afraid of Chro…” she started to say, but was interrupted as all the Discords disappeared in a puff of a smoke, the one remaining pressing his claw against her lips, his playful mood now gone from his visage.
“Don’t call her name,” he snapped. Celestia took a step back to free her lips, but didn’t say anything. “I play by her rules. We all do,” he explained in a kind of confession, looking around the room as if something or someone was hidden and watching. “Past events stay the way they were, even if they rely on actors that are not yet ready to take their parts in history. Timeline causality gives headaches to everyone, myself included. Except… except her.”
After a while of heavy silence, Celestia pressed forward. “So?”
“So?” Discord answered back. “I gave little Twilight the official version of the events, the one written in history books, the one that only involves you and Luna and is resolved in a few minutes.”
For the first time since coming back from the Everfree Forest, Celestia allowed herself to be at ease. With her eyes closed, she let go of a long breath. She suddenly felt tired and her wounds reminded her they required mending. “Thanks.” After a long silence, she opened her eyes to find Discord standing still, staring at her as if she had performed the most chaotic spell in existence. “What?”
Looking childish and uncomfortable, Discord answered while scratching the back of his ear - which was resting in his paw - with his claw. “Well, I’m not used to having ponies thanking me.”
“There’s plenty more where that came from,” Celestia said with a smile. “You said I should take an example from Pinkie Pie, and I agree. I have to learn to have fun myself and not just be satisfied when others are. However, I think you could learn a lot from her too.” She had to suppress her laughter while looking at Discord’s reaction. He was staring at her the same way a owl would, with his head upside down. “I have no doubt Pinkie Pie basks in chaos as much as you do. However, I believe she savors it even more than you when others enjoy it with her. She targets her chaos to those who will appreciate it.”
Discord opened his mouth to answer, his claw pointed at Celestia, but nothing came out. He closed and opened his mouth a few times, still unable to say anything. He stared at the Princess with a cautious look. “Who are you and what have you done with Sunbutt?” he finally managed to ask. She didn't react at the silly nickname he gave her eons ago. “She would have never agreed with anything I say, and even less tell me to get lesson in chaos.”
“Time can erode anything, Discord, even me,” she replied with a smile. “After all, I did give you a second chance, and you took it. Did the Celestia you knew back then would have done that?”
Once again, Discord was rendered speechless, and it was obvious he didn’t like that. He was the one who was so chaotic that others wouldn’t know how to react. Being on the receiving end was surprisingly unexpected for him. He finally decided that the only way to react was by being true to himself; he blew a raspberry, and before Celestia could react, disappeared in a snap of his claw.
Celestia let out a long breath and smiled. In truth, it had been the best encounter with the avatar of chaos she ever had. She didn’t believe he was losing his touch; simply she didn’t react as much to his buffooneries. A thousand years of politic forged her quite a reserve of patience.
She was relieved to know that the timeline, for now at least, was safe. On the other hoof, she was slightly disappointed to learn that her student would still have to perform such a dreaded task. The future was still set in motion.
