The bass was pumping and ponies were dancing. The air was hot and thick with the smell of sweat and alcohol. It was a typical night at Ponyville's newest most happening club and every pony was enjoying getting lost in the music and strippers, every pony that is except for a certain melancholic rainbow maned pegasus, who sat at the bar, her night of getting wasted alone had only just begun.
“Bar keep, another shot of tequila over here!” Normally she wasn't into getting drunk, didn't particularly care for the taste. Tonight however, all she wanted to do was get drunk out of her mind and possibly have a good time, but she wasn't getting her hopes up on that last part. A unicorn behind the counter levitated a bottle and poured it's contents into a small glass. The thumping bass made the drink ripple in the glass. He set the drink in front of her. She was the only one sitting at the counter, everyone else was up and having a good time or at a table enjoying a meal and company. The sight of it pissed her off. She reached for her second glass of the night.
“What are you doing here all by your self sugar cube?” An unexpected voice came from behind her. She turned to the source of the drawl.
“Applejack!? What are you doing here, I thought you were straight?” The farm pony took up the bar stool next to her as she stared blankly at her cup.
“What? Straight folks aren't allowed here?”
“It's strange for a straight mare to come to a strip club where pretty young mares with daddy issues rub their bodies, sensually up on poles for tips. Even besides that, this just doesn't seem like your scene.” She spoke without looking up from her cup, swishing the liquid around in boredom.
Applejack laughed. “Well you got me there, This isn't really my sort of thing, but why are you here alone? I thought you and Twilight wanted to check this place out together?” She finally looked up from her drink, she had sadness and anger in her eyes.
“Buck Twilight! All she does is bitch at me and make me out to be in the wrong when ever we talk! I swear she wasn't such a bitch when we were just friends or when we fist started dating!” Applejack looked at her friend with empathy.
“If it's so bad why don't you two just break up? None of us like to see you two fighting all the time.” She became even more downcast at the simple question. She sighed and took hold of her glass. The fluid burned as it made contact with her tongue and continued burning down her throat as she struggled to suppress her reflex to gag until it settled in her chest with a warm feeling spreading over her. She could already feel the effects of the alcohol work their magic. After downing her liquid courage she proceeded to answer her friend.
“It's not that simple AJ.” Applejack just closed her eyes and shook her head.
“If you say so, I just don't like seeing you this way Rainbow.”
“We'll be fine, I just need to let loose and get wasted tonight. Everything will be better tomorrow.” She herself was less than convinced, she and Twilight had been fighting a lot lately and it only seemed to be getting worse. Damn it! I need more alcohol! I'm making myself bummed out. She thought to herself, contemplating whether to order another drink right now or wait a little.
“Wanna stay and get drunk with me?” She looked dismally at her friend who shook her head in response.
“Sorry but like you said this place just ain't me. I think I'll mosey on down to my usual bar, where I can actually hear myself think, have some drinks and chat with the bar tender every once in a while.” She folded her hooves over the counter and rested her head on them, feeling a bit disappointed that she would be drinking alone.
“That sounds even more depressing.” She said simply. To which Applejack let out a somewhat bitter chuckle.
“Well that's what the drinks are for. Well, I think I'm gonna head out now. You have a good night and don't you do anything too wild now.” She hopped down from the stool and made her way out of the club leaving her alone at the bar. I guess every pony has days where they just need to forget their problems. Applejack is probably no exception. Still it would have been cool to have somepony to drink with. With a heavy sigh she brought her head up.
“Bar keep! Another one!” The bartender brought her her third drink of the night. Quickly gulping it down she carefully got off the stool and made her way to the party. It was a really big place, near the entrance were two bars on opposing sides, after that there were the tables where groups of ponies would sit, eat and drink before or after going to the dance floor beyond them. The dance floor was big with lots of lights strobing, glowing, beaming and sparkling... Buck! That just reminded me of her!
Along the sides of the dance floor were stripper poles and cages where as she said, beautiful fillies wearing only tight thongs strutted their sexy bodies for tips, dancing hypnotically to the beat and lights. Then at the end of the giant hall past the dance floor was the stage where the best dancers would perform exotic, tantalizing dances and where the massive speakers blared the heavy music that reverberated through the club and through her body. She headed for an empty table, still working up the nerve to dance. She wasn't hungry but she figured by the time she was done drinking and wanted to dance she wouldn't be want to go very far, the closer the better. Her mind was already feeling lighter and hazy from the drinks, a good sign for her. She took her seat at the table, luckily most of the tables around her were vacant as well, the dance floor was really starting to heat up and so was the air as she got closer to it. The heat and sweat from the ponies bodies along with the overbearing bass made the air feel alive. They danced, bodies pressed up against each other, twerking and writhing. If you didn't know any better you could think an orgy were about to start. This kind of scene was exactly what she wanted. Loud, seedy, hot and drunk! Her eyes wandered over to the pole dancer. Ponies lined up beneath them, stuffing dollars into their thongs as the dancers pressed their hips into the poles and stretched out their sexy, lithe bodies that glowed in the lights. She had never been so jealous of a pole before...
“Hey bitch! This is our table!” The voice suddenly snapped her out of her libido powered stupor, she whirled around to see a gray coated mare with a darker gray mane staring at her and she had a posse of large stallions behind her.
“The buck did you call me bitch?! Your not blind so you must be stupid, cause there's a bunch of tables around that your fat ass could take up!” She seemed startled for a second, then she just looked pissed off.
“You don't know who I am, do you slut? I'm Octavia, and I always sit at this table and your cheap ass is ruining it for me so get lost!” The stallions began to surround the table, Dash grinned wildly.
“Make me, cunt!” A good old fashioned drunk'n ass kicking! That's just what I need, too bad I'm only buzzed. Now Octavia was smiling manically, she pulled up out a chair from the table and sat down, they stared each other down through each movement.
“I know a way we can settle this.” She spoke slyly
“What did you have in mind?”
“A simple drinking game. Choose your poison.” With out hesitation she responded, glaring at Octavia.
“Whiskey.”
“Baritone!” She called without breaking eye contact to one of her groupies, to which a muscly earth pony in a suit and sunglasses responded. He walked to her side a leaned close so he could hear her better over the thundering music.
“Get ten shots of whiskey for me and this bitch.” He nodded and trotted off to the bar.
“So what game we playing?”
“It's so simple even you can understand it. We are going to hoof wrestle.” Dash burst out laughing, almost falling over in her chair.
“Ha! That's rich! You must be stupid if you think prissy pony trash like you could match me in anything physical!” She banged her hoof on the table while laughing for emphasis. Her henchman returned, balancing a large tray in his hoof filled with full shot glasses. Octavia chuckled insultingly at her as he put the try on the table.
“We'll see. The rules are simple, every thirty seconds you take a shot until someone goes down. Do you understand or do you need me to explain with puppets?”
“Buck you, I got it! And it less than ten seconds flat I'll also have this table all to my self! So bring it!” She put her elbow on the table and held her hoof up, the impact vibrating the drink, though not much more than the music. Octavia did the same, wrapping their hooves around each others they burned into each other with their states.
“Ready!” Baritone began, Her muscles tensing in anticipation.
“Go!” They both thrusted at the others hoof, though she had severely underestimated the cello players strength as she was quickly pulled towards the table, catching herself inches before game over. Holy shit! How is this spoiled little bitch so strong! She gritted her teeth and slowly began to pull back to the center. Focusing on the intense high energy music that she was used to training to gave her a bit more strength. Just as she reached the middle though...
“Thirty seconds! Take a shot!” They both reached under their occupied forelegs and grabbed a shot, quickly pounding it down. It to burned as it went down, she felt her throat trying to reject the drink but she wasn't about to loose. She finished her fourth shot of the night. They struggled at the top, neither giving any more than an inch.
“Thirty seconds. Take a shot!” They repeated the motion, each chugging the shot as though it were also a race, but the alcohol was beginning to hit her. She felt light headed and her stomach felt like it was turning inside out. She finished her fifth shot of the night. Suddenly she felt nauseous, a wave of heat surged through her body. Shit! Not now, not now! I cant.. I can't lose... to this bitch!
Thunk! Her hoof slammed against the table loud enough to be heard over the music, she stared baffled at her hoof, her mind taking a moment longer than it should have to realize what had just happened. Octavia burst out laughing.
“Ah-ha ha, that was great. Thanks for the warm up slut. Now get out of my table and go drink some apple juice till you learn how to drink like a grown up instead of a foal.”
“Hey, buck you cunt!” She yelled spitefully, albeit a bit slurred at Octavia.
“Yeah, what ever bitch, just get lost.”
“Bucking cunt, slut bitch..” She mumbled under her breath as she slinked away to the dance floor. The music's bass shook through her body, the lights, smells and music and mostly the alcohol made everything seem unreal, it was perfect! Hot sweaty bodies bumped into her as she stumbled though the dance floor and she could swear at some point she was being groped but who the buck cared! Ya! This music's pumping and I feel great! I don't care who I dance with or where they touch me or how my hooves got covered in glitter! Let's go bucking wild! Then her stomach churned painfully again. Uhg, I think I'll sit down for a sec first! She scanned around the dance floor and the only seat open was under the pole dancers... Perfect! She staggered over to a the stool and plopped herself down, as soon as she was sure she wasn't going to fall off she looked up at the bucking sexy ass mare dancing and gyrating against the steel pole that glistened with her sweat (and probably other fluids) in the colorful flashing light. She was a pegasus who had a pure white coat that fluoresced in the black lights and what looked like a dark blue mane and tail but it was hard to tell. She wrapped her hind legs around the pole and threw herself back, exposing her chest and abdomen, towards her. She slowly and sensually ran her hooves down her sides bringing them between her legs before bringing her self back up on lower leg strength alone. Resting her shoulder on the steel rod she slowly squatted down, seductively swaying her voluptuous hips in her direction. Buck Ya! Twilight was never that sexy! She pulled out a few bills and went to stuff them in her thong when her hoof met somepony else's also holding a decent amount of bills. She turned to see who's hoof she had just met as she slid the money into the dancer's thong.. Damn that's a fine ass! She thought to her self as she turned. She was more that a little surprised at who it was.
“Hey, aren't you the DJ?” She said bemused at the white unicorn with deep purple shades over her eyes.
“Ya? So what? I'm not allowed to have fun?” She said sarcastically
“Who's playing the music then?”
“I am.” She pointed to her horn which was glowing dimly.
“Oh, I forgot magic was a thing! That's too cool!”
“Damn you must be drunk! Let me help with that.” She looked around until she saw what she was looking for. A waiter, her horn light up even brighter and she pointed to her, then to herself. He nodded and disappeared in the crowed.
“Damn She's sexy right!?” She said as she gave her money to the dancer before slapping her on the ass. Dash laughed loudly at the sight.
“Wow, you got balls! Aren't you going to get in trouble or something?”
“You kidding! I'm DJ Pon3! I can do what ever I want!” As she finished the waiter came with a try carrying two drinks. After grabbing hers she levitated the other over to her new friend.
“What is it?” She asked, tentatively staring at the small glass.
“Jaeger bombs, they're awesome! Got a kick of energy drink in 'em. Give it a shot!” She shrugged.
“Bottoms up!” With that she downed the glass in one shot. Her vision was blurry and her thoughts were fuzzy and she was amazed she could talk right. Her body trembled as it went down.
“Uh, good shit.. Why you’re buying me drinks anyway?” Kay, I can't talk all great I guess.
“That's easy, you're a sexy mare who's into sexy mares. I'm just trying to get in bed with you.” She was taken aback. Am I hearing things or did she say she wants to sleep with me? Her look of confusion and even a little worry was not lost on the DJ as she quickly took it back.
“Just kidding, I saw Octavia being a bitch to you and..” She was silenced as lips met lips. She slid her tongue into the DJ's mouth, the taste of alcohol and her saliva mixed on her tongue as she leaned forward pushing deeper into her mouth. DJ pon3, at first shocked closed her eyes let the other mares tongue explore her mouth. Then she too leaned into the passionate kiss, wrapping her hooves around the rainbow maned pegasus. Their tongues teased each other playfully between their mouths, licking every surface they could find. Eventually the need to breath pulled them apart.
“Damn you're good! With tongue like that and a couple more drinks, I could definitely see us in bed together all night!” She licked her lips seductively. The DJ smiled at her.
“Well then I guess I'm going to have to get you more drunk.” She motioned to the bartender again.
“By the way what's your name?” She asked the DJ, who in response covered her lips with her hood.
“Nope, if I tell you it will ruin the fun of sex with a complete stranger! So I don't want to know your name either!” She nodded, her mouth still covered by her hoof.
“Here you go.” The bartender brought two more drinks over. She was about to down the next one but the DJ stopped her.
“Wait, I have a spell that's hella useful at the club scene.” Her horn ignited in a disco glow than enveloped them both, then evaporated. She looked around in confusion.
“What was that?”
“It's a spell that let's you talk normal no matter how drunk you get! None of the other effects of alcohol are diminished though so it's perfect!”
“Holy shit that's awesome! I hope you know some good tricks in bed to!” Yep, I still have no inhibition! She chugged her drink. It was getting easier and easier, she hardly cared about the taste and the hot sensation was starting to feel really good! But then..
“Oh shit..”
“What is it?”
“I think I'm gonna puke! Where's the bathroom?”
“Shit! It's on the other side of the building! Can you make it?”
“Buck no I cant!” She felt herself starting to dry heave, she was holding back as best she could but she wouldn't last long.
“I got this!” The DJ said as her horn began to light up, suddenly a paper bag materialized in front of her. Wasting no time with thanks she snatched the bag, arching her back and flaring her wings she vomited. The DJ chuckled as she took half her shot. After finishing her bout of vomiting she spit out as much of the contents of her stomach out of her mouth that she could into the bag and wiped her mouth with her hoof.
“Nice.” The bag vanished into thin air and she held her half finished shot out to her friend. “Here, wash it down with this". She gave an ironic laugh but none the less took the rest of her shot, swishing it around in her mouth to kill the taste before swallowing.
“Thanks.” Suddenly a sound caught her attention. It was singing! Really bad singing! She turned excitedly to the DJ.
“They're doing karaoke!”
“Yeah? Why? Ya wanna try it?”
“Buck ya I do!” She bolted up, then nearly tripped over her own hooves as she jumped from her seat. Luckily the DJ caught her before her face would have met the floor.
“Guess that energy shot is kicking in now.” She said as she helped her friend to her hooves.
“Ya wanna sing with me?”
“Nah, If I go up there I'll just show everyone up. I'll save this beautiful voice for some real competition! You go ahead though. I'll be listening from here.”
“You sure?”
“Positive. Now go make a fool of yourself!” She smiled and nodded before staggering away from her soon to be one night stand.
“I'll be back in a minute!” She just made it to the stage as the other pony was leaving it, she must have been pretty drunk to cause she fell down the steps. Dash lent her a hoof she reached the steps. She was an earth pony with a short red mane. She giggled as she helped herself up with the out reached hoof.
“Watch out on you're way down, that last step's a bitch!” They shared a laugh before the earth pony walk off. She very carefully made her way up the steps, then reached for the mic. Magically the exact song she wanted came on.
Off we go, into the cloud filled yonder,
Getting high, while in the sky.
Here they come, drifting to boom and thunder,
At 'em guys, make 'em all cry.
Down we dive, kicking each cloud from under,
Off with one hell of a zoom.
We'll live in fame or go down in shame,
Nothing can stop a Sonic Rainbo... She was stopped on the last word by a very bitchy and disapproving voice
“Rainbow Dash! What do you're think your doing!” She glared at Rainbow Dash from below the stage. Dash stared back at her in drunken stupor before piecing it together. Then she got angry.
“Twilight!”
******************************************************************************************
The entire club went dead silent, the music stopped and everypony stared and Twilight and Rainbow Dash, as if something amazing would happen. Dash clumsily flew off the stage land painfully on her ass in front of Twilight.
“Ouch!” She rubbed her sore backside.
“That's what you get!”
“The buck are you doing here anyway?! You said you wanted to be alone! So go be alone! I'm having fun!”
“Yeah, I know all about the kind of fun you're having! How could you make out with Vinyl Scratch when you're dating me!”
“Damn it Twilight! Now she's not going to have sex with me now that I know her name!”... Shit! Didn't mean to say that... Twilight looked mortified. Than after a second she just looked pissed as hell.
“You were going to sleep with her! I can't believe you would cheat on me!”
“Why cause you're just so perfect?”
“What did you say you slut!?”
“You heard me cunt!” That last word was met with a swift and hard hoof to Dash's face, she felt a sharp stinging pain in her mouth and her jaw almost felt like it had been dislocated. After the shock wore off her rage flared up.
“You hit me! You bitch!” She lunged at Twilight, knocking her to the ground. They rolled around on the dirty floor, exchanging blows until they rolled into some other ponies hooves, causing them to spill a drink on another patron and he was large, drunk and pissed! He swung at the smaller stallion, knocking him into another group, igniting them into a brawl as well. As soon as the next hoof was swung the music kicked up, a hard powerful rock song with bagpipes! A moment later the entire bar was in a frenzy with bottles breaking and chairs and patrons being thrown. All the while the two mares responsible were at each others throats on the floor.
“You bitch! Why is ever thing my fault! You just have to be so bucking perfect all the time!” Dash rolled Twilight on her stomach and grabbed her mane with her teeth, pulling her head up by her hair. Twilight yelped in pain before kicking her hind leg into Dash's, the resulting cry of pain released Twilight from her teeth. She rolled onto her back and delivered a swift kick to Dash's ribs with both her back hooves. She jumped on top of Dash and slapped her with her hoof.
“Because you do irresponsible shit like this! I leave you alone for a few hours and you're already planning a one night stand with a pony you don't even know! I don't know why I bother with you!” With a powerful flap of her wings Twilight was blown off Dash, she jumped at her slamming into her with her entire body weight knocking her over.
“I do things like this because this fight is the first time you shown any real emotion towards me beside bitching at me! Is that it Twilight? Is the only way I can get any caring out of you is to beat it out? Huh!?”
“You're just a slut!”
“And you're a bitch!” They stared at each other, eyes filled with blood thirsty rage, panting and sore. They both lunged at each other... With their lips. Eyes wide in surprise that they both came to the same conclusion at the same time.
“I love you, you slut.” Twilight said with a warm smile through a swollen lip.
“I love you, bitch.” She smiled back. Dash rested her body on top of Twilight, they could feel each other's rapid heart beats and the body heat rising out of them. Dash closed her eyes and pressed her lips against Twilight's, who wrapped her hooves around Dash's neck and slipped her tongue into Dash's mouth. That caught her off guard as Twilight was never one to take initiative with things like this, but she didn't stop there. Using her hooves she pulled Dash to the floor and got on top of her, working her tongue into Dash's mouth. Dash's body went limp as she let Twilight take control. Saliva, alcohol and blood mixed between their tongues and Dash would always remember this as the best kiss she had ever had. Twilight rapped her tail around Dash's. Her kisses became deeper and more passionate and her hips began thrusting against Dash by instinct as Dash began writhing under her with pleasure, but she knew she didn't want to have all the fun right now. Dash slapped Twilight's ass with her hoof, startling her into breaking their embrace, she was blushing furiously which Dash found unfathomably cute.
“How about we save the rest for when we get home?” She smiled up at Twilight who laughed nervously in response.
“Sounds good.” She looked around at the chaos that was the club, the brawl was still on going, they were pretty lucky that they weren't trampled.
“Let's stop them before they set the place on fire.” Rainbow Dash nodded.
“But how?”
“I have and idea.” She smiled devilishly and her horn began to glow, suddenly the music turned off and the fighting slowed down. Twilight cleared her throat.
“Drinks on me!” She screamed, magically projecting her voice through the speakers. As soon as she said that the fighting came to a stop and cheers and applause erupted from the crowed. Twilight stood up off of Dash and extended her hoof out to help her up, which she gladly accepted.
“Twi, I'm sorry I sort of cheated on you. Can you ever forgive me?”
“Dash, I was really hurt when you did that but.. I think it worked out for the best. Promise you'll never do it again? I know I don't show it much but I really don't want to lose you.”
“I promise Twi, I never want to lose you either. I love you Twi.”
“I love you to Dashie. Now lets get some drinks!” She grinned and turned towards the bar with Dash right behind her.
“Sounds like a plan! Hey barkeep! Two tequila..”
“Dash, don't be a pussy, try this. Barkeep, two shots of Absinthe and two shots of Everclear.” He looked at them in surprise but Twilight simply nodded, with a shrug her brought out the four shot glasses, placing one of each in front of them.
“Now lets take both shots at the same time.”
“Okay?” They grabbed one shot in each hoof and downed them. Holy shit! It feels like I'm drinking gasoline! She finished her shots. Then Dash called to the bartender.
“Barkeep! Another round of those for me and my marefriend! Let's party!"
Don't wanna be an Equestrian idiot!
Don't wanna nation controlled by Celestia
I'd prefer Discords hysteria,
than this disaster we call Equestria
Chorus:
Welcome to this land of magic!
Masked with love, but everything is tragic,
And you're forced to believe it's all okay!
An alicorn's dream of tomorrow,
Leaves us wallowing in sorrow,
But no one's allowed to argue!
Everyponys racist in Equestria!
Just ask a griffon, dragon, or zebra.
Scream this message loud so they can hear ya'! From Manehattan down to Draconia!
(Chorus)
Don't wanna be an Equestrian idiot!
Where alicorns control all the media.
There's no magic, its all hysteria!
Its time to say, FUCK YOU, CELESTIA!
***********************************************************************************************
The next morning
Buck! My head is killing me! Where am I? Dash slowly sat up and took in her surroundings. It was Twilight's room, but it was trashed! Empty bottles and energy drink cans strewn the floor along with a guitar that was broken in half? Looking to the other side of the bed she saw Twilight fast asleep but... Wait?! Is she wearing cat ears?! Why? Rainbow Dash removed the covers from herself, her ass as well as various other holes... were sore and her mane was ruffled and patches of fur seemed to have been torn out. Her biggest surprise came when she examined her lower body. Just above her aforementioned sore spot, written in black marker on her fur between her hind legs was written the word “Slut”, though even in her current state she could recognize that writing anywhere. Twilight. Well I guess I had it coming. Wait! Did we have sex! I can't remember a thing! Her next surprise came a little further down. Whose thong am I wearing! And.. Is that money? She had a bright red thong around her thighs and tucked in the side of them was fifty dollars! What the buck? Then at the foot of the bed, she saw a dildo. Damn it! My first time with Twilight and I wont even remember it! Suddenly a snore came from beside her.
“Rainbow Dash, I have a really bad hangover, please stop snoring.” She rolled over facing Dash, her eyes still shut.
“wait that wasn't me?” Then the snore came again, It was beside her.. but it wasn't Twilight! She lifted the blanket up between herself and Twilight.
“Vinyl Scratch!” Dash shouted, quickly regretting making noise as her words reverberated painfully in her head.
“Dash! Keep it down! Go back to sleep..” She reached her hoof over Vinyl towards Dash. Vinyl's head resting at shoulder level to the two of them. But! How! What happened last night.. And.. and why is Vinyl... She sighed in defeat. Oh buck it! She rested her head on the pillow and held Twilight's hoof in hers, resting on Vinyl's chest. Hers and Twilight's faces only inches from each other. She kissed her mare friend lightly on the lips before closing her eyes.
“Good night Twi..”
