Chapters Dedicated to David Hasslehoff for his excellent performance in the musical that inspired me to write this fanfiction, and for giving me a musical that I can turn to when I need inspiration and a chance for my heart to soar.
"TWILIGHT!!!"
As soon as I hear Spike's voice cry out for me, I realize escaping might not be so simple. I am running through the Everfree Forest, desperate to get as far as I can away from my friends.
My heart's pounding like my hooves drumming against the ground. I can feel the rain pouring down on my face as I swerve in different directions to throw my friends off the trail.
Suddenly, I feel that familiar pain rising in my chest. "No, no, no," I think. "Please, not now. I can't let them see me like this!"
My hoof catches on a large stump, and I find myself flying through the air. I land in a puddle, and am splattered with mud. I hear my friends' voices fading away. They must have lost me, because the sharp pain slowly fades away. I sigh with relief, glad that my friends are safe for a while longer.
However, I am exhausted, to say in the least. My muscles ache, and I am out of breath. I swirl my hoof in the mud, as I think to myself, "I guess this isn't so bad. I could stay here awhile."
But then the pain returns, and I realize my friends are close by. So I force myself up, and continue running.
I hear my friends' voices calling my name, but I know that if they find me, She will emerge. She will kill them. And then I will never forgive myself. But then again, I already hate myself for what I've done.
As I continue running, and tears begin to pour down my face. I come across a familiar bridge. The very same bridge that led to the Castle of the Royal Sisters on our very first adventure. I hear Rainbow's voice call out for me, and the pain increases greatly. I do all I can to prevent crying out, and cross the bridge in three short skips. I see the castle before me, and cannot help but stare at it with nostalgia, when I remember my objective.
As I open the door, I see Spike crossing the bridge, and trying to get to the door before I close it. I quickly slam the door and lock it. Immediately, I hear Rainbow banging on the door, yelling, "Twilight, open this door, NOW!!" I back away quickly and run up the stairs. I enter the throne room, and see two seats at the end of the room. One with an insignia of the sun, the other, the moon.
As I run up one of the staircases, three questions blaze through my mind;
"What have I done?" I have placed the lives of my closest friends, and many more, in grave danger
"Will they ever forgive me?" No, definitely not
"How did this happen?"
To answer that question, my mind flashbacks to that fateful day, when all of this trouble began....
Chapter 1: Nightmares of the Past
Five years ago...
It was a warm Saturday morning in Canterlot. There was a blanket of clouds surrounding the sky, and a slight drizzle came down on my mane. I walked into the palace gardens, where I always went to when I needed peace and quiet. You see, this was back when I didn't know AppleJack, or Rainbow Dash, or any of the others yet. It was just me, and Spike, and Princess Celestia.
Back then, I was absorbed in my studies, learning about magic day in, and day out. But when the night fell, or on Saturday mornings, I went to the gardens where I could read my favorite fantasy books, eat a light lunch, or just listen to the birds chirping their melody.
Today was different. I decided to just walk around the garden and look at the flowers blooming on the trees. As I continued my walk, I stopped to see a woodpecker banging its beak on a large oak tree's stubby branch that was twisted and looked strangely like a lever. I shooed the woodpecker away, and stared at the branch. No, it couldn't possibly be a lever.
But I knew that the longer I ignored it, the more I would feel compelled to see if it was a lever. I gave into my curiosity and gently pulled on the branch. When nothing happened, I pulled harder and harder until, with a loud click, the branch switched down. I jumped back at the click, and watched as a section of the tree opened outward like a door. The "entrance" in this tree was huge, big enough for Princess Celestia to easily walk through it.
I hesitated, considering finding a guard to tell him about the entrance. However, there was no guard in sight. I thought of finding the Princess, but I dismissed that quickly, because I really didn't want to bother her when she was probably extremely busy. Taking a deep breath, I slowly walked into the entrance. I lit my horn and saw a swirling staircase below. It looked like it was about a twenty foot drop from where I stood. I nudged a pebble over the edge, and in a few seconds, I heard the pebble hit the ground, and decided that to just run down the stairs, see what was down there, and run back up.
As I begin my journey down the stairwell, I feel extremely cold. I look around the damp room and shiver violently. You'd think some pony would clean this place up, I wonder. Then I get the feeling that it's so cold and dirty down here because no pony's been down here recently. I panic and begin to backtrack, thinking this is a place that I'm not supposed to be in, but I stop. If I am not supposed to be down here, wouldn't there be at least one guard by the entrance? Or wouldn't they have hidden the lever somewhere less obvious? I turn around and continue my descent through the stairwell.
Soon, I reach the bottom and see a large steel door with a deadbolt holding it in place. I see no lock holding the deadbolt, so I slide the lock open with my magic. The door slowly opens with a loud creak, and I walk through the doorway. But nothing could prepare me for what I saw in this room. It was a long, dark hallway that had water dripping down the walls, with a torn-up carpet spread out on the floor, and it was just as cold in here as in the staircase. On either side, there were numerous jail cells made completely out of stone, even the bars. But that wasn't what frightened me. It was what was inside the cells.
Ponies.
Deranged, half-crazed ponies
In every cell that I could see, there were at least five ponies, along with one blanket and pillow for each pony, and a food/water bowl that looked to have been empty for some time. Some of the ponies looked at me for a moment, and then focused their attention to something else, some held their stare and grinned wickedly, like I was a meal, and some even pressed their faces against the bars, reaching out for me, with that same, unnerving look. I shuddered at the sight, and wondered if Princess Celestia even knew about this. I gulped and slowly walked down the hall, hoping to find an exit on the other side.
I continued down the hall, staring at the cages, and the ponies inside them. How long have they been down here?? I think. I couldn't help but get the feeling that Princess Celestia did know about this tunnel. But, why would a fair ruler like Princess Celestia lock these ponies away from the world, imprisoning them like animals?
I came to a dead end in the tunnel and I felt sweat beading on my forehead. Now I had to backtrack through this....place...with a hundred eyes on me, no doubt wanting me dead. I took a deep breath, looked straight ahead, and walked quickly down the hall. I was almost to the door when a Pegasus mare reached out, wrapped her front hooves around my neck, and screamed, "Where you going, my pretty??" I screamed, struggled out of the Pegasus' grip and bolted.
As soon as I got into the staircase, I slammed the door shut, and closed the deadbolt. But I didn't stop there. I ran as fast as I could up the stairs and leaped through the exit. I landed on what I thought was grass, but felt cold as stone. Stone. I quickly stood up and blinked twice as I saw my vision of the garden fade away, and found myself back in the dark tunnel. Only I wasn't in the tunnel. I was in a cage. I felt the walls closing around me, and heard deep moaning from the ponies surrounding me.
I felt myself falling out of bed and hit the floor with a dull thud.
"Owww...," I said as I rubbed the new bruise on my head.
"Twilight?" a voice called out. I heard the door open and looked up to see Spike's head peering in ever so slightly, with a look of concern in his eyes.
"Twilight? Is everything okay?? I heard you screaming."
I glance at the floor, staring the broken vase by my hooves. I must have broken it in the middle of the night.
"I'm fine, Spike," I say with a hint of annoyance in my voice.
I look back at him, and I know he knows I'm not. "Did you have that nightmare again?"
I sigh with both pain and frustration and say, "It's never come this often before."
Spike climbs up the stairs and onto my bed. "Y'know, I'm here if you ever want to talk."
I nod my head slowly. "I know. It's just..." I shake my head slowly. "I'm scared that I'm going to fail. That I'm going to let them down."
"Hey," he says, placing his claw on my cheek. "I believe in you. I know you'll find a way. And I'll be right here till the very end."
Tears begin to well up in my eyes, and I hug him tightly. "Oh, Spike," I say. "What would I do without you?"
I see tears forming in Spike's eyes as he returns the hug. We let go of each other, and he hops off the bed.
"Well," he says, "I'd better get going. Gotta go pick up that ingredient from Zecora's."
I'm not sure what he meant, at first, but then I remember last night. I had received a letter from Zecora telling me that she had the last ingredient I needed for my potion.
"Okay then, Spike," I call out. "Be careful not to wander off, okay?"
"Yeah, yeah," Spike calls back.
Still feeling tired, I slide back into bed, and lay my head on the pillow. I sigh happily, glad to know Spike's got me covered when I feel defeated. My eyes close slowly, I and fall into a dreamless sleep.
Chapter 2: The Potion/Twilight's Request
I wake up to the smell of cake batter and hear Spike whistling happily as I roll out of bed.
"Spike?" I call.
I hear no answer, so I take a guess that he was at Rarity's. I brush my hair as I think about my nightmare. I remember everything up to running out of that stairwell actually happened. After I escaped, I ran out of the garden, ignoring the concerned calls from the guards, and went straight to my room, trying to forget that the day ever happened.
A few hours later, Princess Celestia found curled up on my bed, crying, and tried to comfort me. I suppose the guards alerted her. After I told her of what I saw, she took me to my study and explained to me that the tunnel I found was an asylum she'd built several decades ago to hold ponies who had extreme mental disorders. As cruel as it sounded, Princess Celestia did not wish to lock the ponies away, but she saw no other choice.
A few days later, an idea came to mind. What if I could concoct a potion that could cure the ponies? I confronted Celestia with this thought. At first, she wasn't sure, seeing the idea as risky. But I eventually convinced her that I could do it. She sent me off with her wishes of good luck, and hope for success. Now, five years later, I am at the verge of completing my potion.
I climb down the set of stairs and open my bedroom door to see Spike dusting off the book shelves. On the table is a vase of pink roses, a steaming cup of tea, and two white muffins with multi-colored specks, one of which is half-eaten.
Spike finishes dusting and slides down the ladder. "Morning, sleepyhead!"
I rub my eyes and walk over to the table. "What's this?"
"Those," Spike replies. "Are cake batter muffins." I realize how hungry I am, and eat the whole muffin with one bite, and immediately, a creamy flavor floods my mouth. Spike shrugs and eats the rest of his muffin.
"Where did you get these?" I ask.
"On my way back from Zecora's, Mrs. Cake was offering free samples of these muffins, so I took a couple for us. She calls them 'Birthday Muffins.' Although, Pinkie Pie wanted to call them 'Unbirthday Surprise Muffins."'
I couldn't help but giggle at the name, even though I had no idea what an "Unbirthday" was.
We spend the next hour sipping tea, (Well, I do, Spike hates tea) enjoying the pleasure of each other's company, and talking about life in Ponyville, news of dragon migrations happening in Trottingham, and some rumor that Princess Luna is trying dress making as a hobby.
"I think Rarity's got some competition," Spike remarks.
"Don't tell her I said that, though."
"Your secret's safe with me, Lover Boy."
Another fifteen minutes later, our dishes are washed and put away, and the table's cleared off. Spike stands in front of me, rocking back and forth on his heels, almost like he's expecting me to say something.
"So?" He asks.
"So.....what?"
"What's in the box??"
"You didn't see?"
"Nope. When I came to Zecora's, she went behind some curtain, pulled out that box and gave it to me."
I walk over to the table where the box is and open it, revealing a poison joke flower. Spike immediately dives under the table.
"Spike," I say. "It's not going to hurt you."
"How do you know? I know poison joke does some wacky things!"
"Okay, yeah, I know poison joke made my horn all floppy, and shrunk Applejack, and all that other stuff."
"That's my point!!"
"Let me finish," I say with a twinge of annoyance.
"Fine," Spike says as he slowly crawls out from his hiding place.
"Zecora told me in her letter that she created a powder that can temporarily neutralize poison joke. Rest assured, this won't affect any pony."
Spike paused for a moment, then crossed his arms and said, "I'm still keeping my distance."
I roll my eyes and carry the box to my laboratory. On a large desk lays a structure of glass tubes with a solid blue liquid in one end. Across from the desk is a table with books and vials scattered all over. I place the box on the table, and pull out my journal. Spike enters the room when I begin writing.
"October 29th. 12:00 AM. Having obtained the poison joke flower from Zecora, I am ready to concoct my potion. Should I succeed, I will use a pony from the asylum as a test subject."
I put down the quill, pour the blue liquid into a triangular bottle, and tilt it left and right quickly, then place it on a pedestal with a flame underneath. I pull out the poison joke and crush it in a ceramic bowl with a pestle. Spike watches intently as I gently pour the poison joke powder into the bottle. Finally, I slowly stir the mixture with a Pegasus feather. The potion bubbles, and a puff of smoke erups from it. Its color transforms from blue to a transparent, ruby red.
Spike and I stare at the newly fused potion curiously.
After a few minutes of checking my notes, I say, "Well, I think it worked."
Spike laughs triumphantly. "Nice! Princess Celestia will love this!"
"Yes, she will," I say quietly. I return to my journal and write.
"12:05 AM. I have done it. I have successfully created my TS8 Formula. I will search for a test subject ASAP."
"TS...8??" Spike say, confused.
"Twilight Sparkle, formula attempt 8," I reply. "Now Spike, I'll need you to send a letter to Princess Celestia. I have to speak to the Princess about a volunteer later."
"A volunteer? Spike asks. Why not use it on yourself?"
"It doesn't work like that. This potion is meant to cure mentally challenged ponies, not everyday ponies."
"Oh....wait, what??"
I sigh deeply and realize that I need to explain this to him.
"Remember that one time you became a full-grown dragon because your greed got out of control?"
"Yeah....I'd like to forget it, though."
"Well, I believe that all sentient species have two sides. One good, one evil. Let's say your greed represents your evil side. Once your greed overcame your good side, you lost control of your actions. And I also believe that the ponies in the asylum are insane because their evil overcame their good, thus they lost control of their own actions. My potion's purpose is to remove the majority of the ponies' evil."
"Wait, why not remove all of the evil?" Spike asks.
"Well, if got rid of all evil in their hearts, they wouldn't have much personality to themselves. If I used such a potion on Rarity, she wouldn't be so dramatic about her designs, and all her dresses would be pretty dull. If I used it on Fluttershy, she wouldn't have her shyness which makes her gentle with animals."
"Huh," Spike says. "I suppose that makes sense."
"Anyway," I say. "Can you go get some paper and a quill?" Spike swiftly runs out of the room and comes back with a scroll and a quill.
"Ready when you are, boss."
"Ahem. Dear Princess Celestia," I begin. "I am happy to inform you that my potion is a success. All I require now is a test subject for my experiment. I request to speak to you on this matter soon. Sincerely, Twilight Sparkle."
Spike rolled up the scroll, and unleashed a green flame, evaporating the letter.
"There. The letter's on its way," Spike says with a sparkly grin.
"Thank you, my Number One Assistant," I say. Suddenly, Spike belches and a letter appears in a puff of smoke.
"Oh, that was fast," I say as Spike unrolls the letter and begins to read.
"My dearest Twilight, I am happy to know of your success. Please come to Canterlot this afternoon so we can speak of finding a volunteer. Be sure to bring your potion and notes. Sincerely, Princess Celestia."
"Okay, better get going, then," I say with confidence. "C'mon, Spike.
"Wait, we're going right now??"
"Of course. By the time we get there, it'll be late afternoon." I take my potion, journal, and any other items relating to my research, and stuff them in my saddlebag.
As we head outside, several birds soar past us. The whole town is full of activity, with Fluttershy guiding a pack of ducks across the street, and the CMC sitting in a circle, not doubt plotting some scheme to get their cutie marks. As we come across Sugar Cube Corner, Pinkie Pie hops out of the building toward us.
"Hey, Twilight! Hey, Spike! Wanna make cupcakes with me?"
"Oh, Pinkie," I say. "I'm so sorry. We can't. It's just that we..." But I can't finish my sentence.
"That's okay. Some other time. Besides, Rainbow Dash said 'Yes', so we'll be making cupcakes together! In the meantime, here." She inflates and gives me and Spike two, star-shaped balloons.
"Well, see you later!" Pinkie hops away as she hums a catchy tune. Spike and I exchange glances and shrug.
"That was nice of her," Spike says.
"Yeah...," I say with a grin.
"Though, I didn't think Rainbow was so interested in cupcakes."
The walk to the train station is uneventful, except for Applejack waving at us, and commenting on Applebloom trying to use a flamethrower this morning. We get on the train and settle down in the fourth-to-the-back car. I sit down and stare out the window, imagining how my meeting with Princess Celestia will turn out....
"Welcome back, Twilight Sparkle!" Princess Celestia says cheerfully as I walk into the throne room. Princess Luna sits on her throne as Celestia stands on the small staircase before me. Spike decided to wait outside, to avoid getting bored by all the "Wibbley wobblely timey wimey stuff", as he put it.
"Hello, Princess Celestia. Hello Princess Luna," I say cheerfully.
"Hello, Twilight Sparkle!! " Luna booms happily. The whole room shakes at her voice. She blushes with embarrassment, and says in a whisper, "Uh, I mean, hello, Twilight Sparkle."
I give a reassuring smile that tells her that she's okay. She smiles back, relieved that she didn't do any damage. Celestia smiles at me, and waves her hoof towards Luna, probably telling her that she is dismissed, because she quickly gets up and exits the room.
"Now," Celestia begins. "In your letter, you say you completed your potion."
"Yes, Princess," I say. "I did."
"May I see this potion and your journal?"
I take the items Celestia asks for, and bring them before her. She examines the potion for a moment, and then looks through my journal. After a few minutes of this, she puts both items down, and says, "I am very impressed by your work. Your journal's duly noted and well written, and your potion seems to be in order."
I bow my head humbly.
"Thank you Princess. But I couldn't have done it without your support." Princess Celestia nods intently and continues.
"However, I must ask, who do you plan to test the potion on? I'm afraid I cannot have a public testing without raising some kind of alarm amongst my subjects."
"Well, I was thinking," I begin. "Back when I first started, you promised to provide an asylum pony to work with. I think I should use the potion on one of them." I expect a response, but I am only met with silence and a look of surprise.
"Princess?" Celestia only looks at me like I've got a spider on my face.
Finally, she clears her throat and gathers her bearings.
"Twilight....," she says with a pained look. "I appreciate your enthusiasm and hard work. I really do. But....." Celestia pauses like she's trying to find the right words.
"I can't....allow you to...use a pony from the asylum." I'm not sure how to respond to this. Why was Princess Celestia going back on her promise??
"Twilight, please understand. I would be more than happy to give you an asylum pony to work with, but I can't risk you, or anypony else going back down there."
"Okay....why not?" I try to say without sounding angry.
"Remember when you told me of what happened the first time? How that Pegasus got you in a headlock?"
"Yes...I do," I say slowly.
"I hope you realize that your escaping was a miracle. That Pegasus, no doubt, was aiming to snap your neck."
I nod my head slowly. I already know where this is going.
"The asylum ponies have become more and more aggressive since the last time you were down there. There have been reports of the inmates attacking each other. Should you go down there again...." We both know what would happen in this circumstance.
"I'm afraid I must forbid you from using an asylum pony. For your own safety."
In that moment, a hundred different insults, remarks and curses rise in my chest. But I take a couple deep breaths and relax.
"All...all right, Princess Celestia. I'm sorry I wasted your time."
The Princess walks over to my side and gently hugs me.
"I'm sorry I had to do this. But this is for the best."
We part from and smile at each other.
"Hey," she says as she wipes a tear from my cheek.
"You'll find your volunteer soon enough."
I sniff quietly and thank the Princess again for her support. Suddenly, the doors burst open to reveal a panting Shining Armor.
"Twilight!" He calls. "Come with me now! "
"Shining?" I say with confusion. "What wrong??"
"It's Mom. There's been an accident." Terror crosses my face as I dart towards him and out the door.
Chapter 3: Lost in the Darkness
I can only recall three other times when I have felt this same terror lingering in my heart. First, when Spike ran away because he thought that I didn't love him anymore, and almost got eaten by a huge dragon, second, when Cadence and I tried to find our way out of the Canterlot caves, while Shining Armor was about to marry that witch, Queen Chyrsalis, and third, when I raced through the Empire, desperate to find the Crystal Heart.
Spike rode on my back as Shining Armor and I ran through the moon-lit streets of Canterlot.
"I had a sent letter to your friends in Ponyville a while ago," Shining Armor says. "They're most likely at the hospital waiting for us now."
"Do you know what happened, exactly?" I ask.
"All I know is that there was an accident, and that Mom's pretty banged up."
Oh god, oh god, oh god... I shake my head in disbelief.
As we arrive at the hospital, we see Nurse Redheart, waiting outside for us.
When she sees us, she calls out, "Miss Sparkle, Captain Armor, come in, quickly." We follow her inside and through several well-lit hallways.
At least it isn't dark, like that asylum...., I think to myself.
After I came home from Princess Celestia's castle that fateful day, my Mother came to comfort me. If there was anypony that supported, comforted, and guided me more than Princess Celestia, it was her. She was the one who decided to enroll me into "Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns". She supported me when I started my journey to find a cure for the asylum ponies. Yes, she was quite firm with discipline, and was a bit impatient, but she was still a mother who loved me and Shining Armor with all her heart.
Redheart leads us to the waiting room, where Cadence and my Father are in one corner of the room, talking quietly to each other, and Pinkie Pie, Rarity, Applejack, Rainbow Dash, and Fluttershy are playing a board game. When they all see me walk in, they leave their places and give comforting words.
Nurse Redheart walks past us and into the next hallway. After she leaves, I go over to Cadence.
"Did the doctor say if Mom's okay yet?"
"No, I'm sorry," she replies. "He said that we can come to his office when he's ready." I sigh and stare at a random tile on the floor.
This is going to be a long night.
As the time that feels like endless hours passes by, we all play a couple rounds of Pinkie's board game and watch the other concerned families come and go through the doors. Finally, two hours later, Redheart, comes out.
"Twilight Sparkle?" I stand up and walk over to the nurse.
"Doctor Stable will speak to you and your family now." Immediately, Cadance, Shining Armor, and my father come up. But so do the rest of my friends.
Nurse Redheart stops the others and says firmly, "Just your family." I glance over at my friends and nod for them to sit down. Spike decides to stay behind with everypony else.
"Alright. Follow me," Redheart says. I get a twinge of fear at the way she spoke. She sounded like she was trying to sound calm, but couldn't.
Please let her be okay. Please....
We enter Doctor Stable's office and I take a quick look around the room. There are a two file cabinets, one in each corner behind his desk. Off to my right is a table with several bottles filled with various medicines. Doctor Stable had just finished writing something as we came in.
"Ah, welcome. Have a seat." He gestures toward four cushioned stools. Cadence and I sit down. Shining Armor and my Father remain standing.
"With all due respect, sir," my Father says. "I would like to get this done and over with soon."
"Of course, Mr. Night-Light," Stable says with a heartfelt voice. "It has been a long evening for all of us." He walks over to one of the cabinets, and pulls out a file with two letters on its tab; T.V. I recognize this as my Mother's initials. Twilight Velvet. He sits back down and turns to me, while opening the file.
"Now, Miss Sparkle, I'll be perfectly frank with you, all I know of what happened, is what I have read in this file. According to the report, an alarm flare went off sometime around 5 PM in the outskirts of town. The guards found your mother and two cartridge drivers on the side of the path. We believe that the cause this accident was a pack of timberwolves.
Timberwolves..... I think with hatred. Of all the creatures in Equestria.....why timberwolves?
"Unfortunately," The doctor continues. "The drivers were dead when they found them."
"A-and....and my Mother? Is she okay??" I ask.
"Fortunately, she only suffered a couple wounds along her back and legs." I look over at Shining Armor and sigh with relief. Until I hear Stable say, "But, Miss Sparkle..."
I turn back to him.
"But....what ?" Stable doesn't answer. He just stares at me, sweat beading on his forehead. He almost looks like he's struggling to decide whether or not to tell us something important.
Cadence stands up.
"Sir, if there's something wrong with her, please, tell us."
Stable snaps out of his hesitation and says, "I think you should just come with me, and see for yourself." He leads us out of the office and down a hall towards a steel door with several locks. Stable pulls out a large ring holding many keys and begins unlocking the door.
"What is the meaning of this?" My Father demands, looking at the door.
"Just a precaution, Mr. Night-Light," Doctor Stable says without looking up. "Just a precaution." He opens the door and motions for us to follow. My heart stops when I see what's inside. There are several rooms closed with steel doors on either side, and in these rooms are ponies. They didn't look like the deranged ponies that I saw years ago, but something about them felt so unnerving. Most of them just have dark circles under their eyes and look half-asleep, but a couple of them looked somewhat unhinged.
I back up quickly and nearly gag. Even though the room is luminous and warm, memories of the dark asylum come rushing back to me. The moaning ponies, the cold atmosphere.....the Pegasus who tried to snap my neck. I whimper quietly and close my eyes tightly as tears begin to form in my eyes. Cadence runs to my side.
"You don't have to go through this if you don't want to. You can stay out here while we go see how Mom is."
I take slow, deep breaths and shake my head.
"No, I....I want to see her."
Cadence puts a hoof on my shoulder and leads me through the hall. Stable looks at me questionably until Shining Armor goes to him and whispers something.
"Oh, I see," Stable replies. "I can give her a shot to calm her system if she'd like." Shining looks over at me, expecting an answer. I quickly shake my head.
If I'm going to see my Mother, I'm not doing it drugged and half-conscious.
We reach a room at the end of the hall, to our left. Doctor Stable unlocks the door and leads us in. The room is decorated with a couple ropes of green tinsel hanging along the ceiling. There's a small rug, laying bunched up on the floor and a hospital bed in the right corner. On the bed, is my Mother, sleeping quietly. I now see the damage from the timberwolves' attack. There are several deep cuts across her back and legs. I look over at Stable, and he nods for me to go up to her. I take a deep breath approach the bed.
"Mom? Can you hear me?" There's no response, so I speak louder.
"Mom?" Still no answer. I gently put my hoof on her back. This time, her eyes snap open, and she looks up at me. But instead of embracing me, she shoves my hoof off her and retreats as far back away from me until she's pressed up against the corner. I glare at Doctor Stable questionably.
"What happened to her?!"
"We have reason to believe that the timberwolves' attack left your mother in a post-traumatic stress disorder." Shining Armor lowers his head and sighed. My Father joins and comforts him. I stare at the ground, while Cadence tries to approach my Mother, but is met with the same response.
"Why doesn't she recognize us?" she asks
"Sometimes, in severe cases, post-traumatic stress disorder can impair one's ability to recognize even the closest of family. When she was brought here, she showed immediate signs of PTSD. At first, she wouldn't let any of us near her."
"But, she's going to be okay, right?" Shining Armor asks.
"Overall, yes, she will be just fine. Her symptoms of PTSD are stable, but most likely permanent." I bite my lip and shake my head slowly.
No....this can't be happening. It just can't be happening.
"I'm so sorry, Miss Sparkle," Stable says to me. "We've done all that we could." My eyes widen at this last statement. I glare at Stable, even though his back is turned, talking to my family.
"I can set a schedule to visit twice a week. Again, I am so sorry for-"
"Excuse me?" Doctor Stable turns to the sound of my voice.
"I'm sorry, Miss Sparkle?" he asks, feeling confused by my tone.
"You say that you did all that you could?"
"Well...yes, Miss Sparkle. There's nothing more we can do." My eyes pierce his with anger.
"No. No, I'm sorry. But this, " I gesture towards my Mother. "Is the best that you can do?!"
Miss Sparkle, please calm dow-"
"No, I will NOT calm down! First of all, my name is not 'Miss Sparkle.' Second of all, it's your job to save the lives of ponies, right?" I don't even bother to let him respond.
"And third, you leave my Mother in a traumatic state, and all you can say is, 'We've done all that we can'''?!
"Twiley....," Shining Armor begins.
"No, Shining Armor," I snap back. I start to corner Doctor Stable. He backs up against the wall, politely asking me to calm down. "If my Mother's trapped in this....prison...because of some traumatic disorder, then I think that you're not doing your job!"
"TWILIGHT SPARKLE! " I freeze at the sudden outburst. I turn to see Cadence with a very stern look on her face. I never thought she could be so loud. Even the patients in the other rooms are looking at the alicorn. Cadence's expression softens to a simple stare.
"Twilight, please understand, this isn't something that can be easily fixed. Doctor Stable is doing his best to help our Mother. And taking it out on him isn't making anything better."
"I....," I felt my throat closing around my words. Cadence walks over to me and slowly strokes my mane.
"I know you're upset about all of this," she says in a hushed voice. " Nopony ever said that this sort of thing would be easy or pleasant."
"It's....it's n-not f-fair....," I whisper.
"I know, Twilight," Cadence says. I can see tears forming in her eyes as well. Then, after a long pause, she says, "I will not say do not weep. For not all tears are an evil." By now, my whole body's shaking, and tears are pouring from my eyes. Shining Armor and my Father join us in a small circle. Eventually, we separate and clear our eyes. I go over to Doctor Stable and apologize for my outburst. He just shrugs it off like it were nothing.
"It happens, Twilight. More often than you realize." I smile and thank him for doing his best, when Nurse Redheart pokes her head in.
"Excuse me, everypony. I'm afraid visiting hours are over. One by one, we leave the room, until I'm the last one still inside. I stop at the door, and stare at my Mother, who is blankly staring at the ceiling.
"Twilight?" I turn to Doctor Stable's voice. He looks over at Nurse Redheart, whispers something to her, and turns back to me.
"I'll give you a few more minutes with her." My eyes lit up and I thank him again.
"I'll be out here if you need me," he says as he closes the door with his magic. I walk towards my Mother, who proceeds to back into the corner again. I back up a few steps, and she relaxes. I take a deep breath and speak to her.
"Mom....I'm so sorry this happened. I should have been there with you. Maybe I could have saved you. I could have done something to protect you. But I wasn't there for you.....and now you're lost in this darkness." My Mother stares at me with curiosity. I take a few steps closer.
"I guess you didn't hear, but I perfected my potion. Well, not exactly, yet. I still need to test it on somepony. I don't know who yet. It's too dangerous to use it on one of those asylum ponies. But I'll figure it out....somehow." I sigh and lower my head, knowing that my words couldn't possibly get through to her. But then, something strange happens. She gets down off of her bed and wraps her hooves around me. Not like that Pegasus in the asylum, but a gentle, motherly hug. Then, a soft voice fills the air.
"Tw.....twi.....l.....l...light...." My head shoots up, and my eyes meet hers. I see a look of determination in her eyes. She speaks again.
"Twi......twi....l...l...l...light..." But she can't finish her sentence. She tries one more time
Twi....light.....Spar.....k....k...le." A ray of hope fills my chest. Maybe, just maybe, there's still a chance to get my mother back! I hold my Mother close to me.
"Mom, listen to me, " I say. "I promise you that I will find a way to test the potion. I won't give up until you're cured. I swear it."
"Miss Sparkle?" I look over at Doctor Stable. "I'm sorry, Twilight, but I have to ask you to leave. Nurse Redheart wants the patients, your mother included, to get some rest."
"Yes, of course," I say. I look over at my Mother.
"I'll come back soon, okay?" She stares at me for a while, and then climbs back on her bed. I follow the doctor out of the room, through the halls, and into the waiting room, where all my friends are waiting. I quickly explain the situation to them. The girls and Spike sigh with relief, and Pinkie is about to shoot off a party cannon, but is stopped by Nurse Redheart. Soon, we're all out of the hospital, and on our way.
"Cadence and I are staying in Canterlot for a few weeks," Shining Armor tells me when we arrive at the train station. "Just until Mom's stable" We say our goodbyes and part ways, Shining Armor, Cadence and my Father going home, and me, Spike, and the girls board the train, prepared for our long journey home.
Chapter 4: Broken Identity
Soarin bolted through the evening sky, constantly checking the watch on his leg. The wind blew in his mane as he glided over the plains, on his way to Canterlot.
Shoot, Silver's gonna kill me, he thought.
Silver Mist was an employer for his career as a Skydancer. He had no doubt that she was backstage, cursing and swearing over his lateness. He checked his watch again, feeling irritated.
Yep, she's gonna kill me. If she doesn't, maybe Glider will.
Glider was another employer of his. Actually, she was the head of the team that Soarin was working for, The Skydancers, with Silver Mist as her second-in-command. Like the Wonderbolts, the team was a group of pegasi that performed by soaring through the skies, and executing various maneuvers. Unlike the Wonderbolts, though, they often told stories with their performances.
Despite Soarin's claim to fame was being a member of the Wonderbolts, his career with them was over. A couple months ago, he crashed into, and destroyed a blimp during a Wonderbolts show, ruining the whole performance. After arguing for over an hour with the mayor of Manehatten, Spitfire was given no other choice but to discharge Soarin from the Wonderbolts, leaving him without a career. So when Silver Mist and Glider offered to recruit him to the team, he accepted.
However, there were two problems with his new career. First his employers. Silver Mist was extremely strict, and often gave him a hard time. And Glider was, simply put, a mean-spirited mare who was all work and no play. A mare who controlled the Skydancers with an iron hoof.
When Soarin first joined the team, what he found out the hard way was, once you sign up with the Skydancers, you can't quit. If you ever try to leave, they just blackmail you. Sometimes they just take your next pay. Sometimes they find and threaten to expose your darkest secrets, something which Glider could do with the greatest of ease. But in very extreme circumstances, they'll even give death threats. Although, the threats aside, being a Skydancer was actually pretty fun, and very rewarding. Audiences were always permitted to give the Skydancers money, and for Soarin, he got a lot, due to his former popularity as a Wonderbolt.
The second problem was, shortly getting kicked out of the Wonderbolts, he took a hard look at his life and realized, he didn't know who he was. Sure, he was an strong pegasus and handsome stallion. But nothing more. Soarin longed to know what his destiny was, now that he was no longer a Wonderbolt. Was he an athlete? A student? A gentlecolt? Or just, simply, a nopony? A pony who doesn't matter, who isn't meant to have a future? All he knew for sure was that he wasn't going to find out by sitting around, waiting for opportunity.
Soarin had been working hard on a skydance routine for several weeks. A routine that he was certain of, would show Silver Mist what he could do. Surprisingly, he had impressed both her and Glider, with his work. He was given permission to perform it tonight, with one other pegasus. But that wasn't going to happen if he was late!
He flew with new bursts of speed, approaching Canterlot's district. Soon, the grass field, where the Skydancers' show was being held, came into view. In the middle of the field, was a stage, and behind it, a small tent, the so-called "backstage". The bad news was, the show was well underway. There was already a large crowd gathered. The good news, though, his main routine was to come last. Feeling satisfied, he landed a ways behind the crowd and sneaked quietly to the backstage. But not before bumping into a grey mare with a ruby red mane, who was waiting for him just outside.
"Where were you?!" she cried out. "The others had to fill in for you!"
"I'm sorry, Silver Mist." Soarin said. "I really am. I lost track of time and-"
"No excuses! Get in there, now!" Soarin entered the tent without hesitation. Inside was an oval-shaped mirror, and a table for performers to put their saddlebags. The tent was lit only by a few small candles placed near the corners. Three pegasi were standing inside when Soarin came in.
"Well, well, well, Soarin," Thunderlane, a black stallion with a blue-silver mane said. "It's about time you showed up."
"Ah, look who it is; his royal highness," Midnight Strike, a black mare with a black and yellow mane, teasingly joined in. "The Prince of the Skydancers."
"I'm really sorry, guys," Soarin apologized as he threw his watch and saddlebag on the table.
"I tried to get here as soon as I could." Just as he said this, Silver Mist walked into the tent, and glared at Soarin.
"You are in trouble, Soarin. We are running late, and Glider is in a foul mood."
"Ooh, that'd make a nice change around here," Soarin remarked sarcastically.
"Oh, don't upset her, Soarin," said Wildfire, a cream-colored mare with a chocolate brown mane. "You know what Glider can do." She tossed Soarin his uniform, a simple black leotard with his cutie mark stitched on the flank, and a pair of black goggles.
"So, where were you, Soarin?" asked Thunderlane, as he adjusted his outfit. "I suppose you were back in Cloudsdale, listening to one of those speeches again?"
"And what's wrong with that? I like to listen," Soarin said as he slipped his outfit on. "I just want to learn."
"I dunno, Soarin," Midnight Strike began. "Filling your head with all that rubbish could get you killed someday." Thunderlane murmured with agreement, and Wildfire remain silent, neither agreeing nor objecting. Silver Mist ignored Thunderlane and faced Soarin.
"All you need to learn, is to be on time. Now you get out on that stage in two minutes." She went over to the mirror, brushed out her red mane, and turned to leave the tent.
As she walked away, she began to say, "I don't know who you ponies-"
"Think you are!!" the four pegasi finished in mocking unison. Silver turned around slowly and glared at them.
"....Think you are."
"Well, don't worry, Silver," Soarin replied. "Nor do we." As laughter filled the tent, Silver scoffed angrily at him and left.
"Ah, I'd rather be a nopony than her," Soarin said as he stretched out and flexed his wings.
"Oh, cheer up, Soarin," Wildfire said with a compassionate voice. "You're the nicest, most amazing nopony that I know. And besides, after your performance with Thunderlane tonight, I'm sure things will be different around here."
Soarin smiled at her. When he first joined the Skydancers, Wildfire was the first to greet him. She showed him the basics of Skydancing, and how to generally please Silver Mist and Glider. The two quickly became best friends, and started practicing together. In fact, she was the one who inspired Soarin to create his Skaydance routine.
Soarin was also became good friends with Midnight Strike and Thunderlane. Soon, the four pegasi started hanging out together on the weekends, going to the theater and playing board games. On one occasion, Midnight Strike brought a karaoke machine, and the four sang together. Somepony actually called guards on them, and almost got them arrested, but even then, the four friends had fun that night.
"Thanks, Wildfire," Soarin began. "But that still doesn't change the fact that I don't know who I am." He walked over to the mirror and straightened out his mane.
"It's such a shame. Spitfire told me that I had so much potential. I wouldn't be here if it weren't for that stupid blimp." Wildfire put a hoof on his shoulder and tried to give comforting words.
"I know it's been hard, Soarin. I know that being a Wonderbolt was your passion."
"Not helping," Soarin said as he glanced at her.
"Sorry. My point is, I think that there was a purpose for all this. I think that something good will come out of this. " Soarin smiled again and looked back at his reflection.
"I dunno, Wildfire. All I want to know is what my destiny is. I mean, am I meant to be the face of the future? Of the past? Or am I just some....loser who isn't meant for anything?" Thunderlane and Midnight Strike joined Soarin's side, trying to cheer him up.
"I wish that I could find my destiny," he continued. "But honestly, even if I found it, besides you guys, who'd ever give a damn? I just gotta face the facts. Nopony, not me, not you guys, not even Princess Celestia. Nopony....cares who I am."
Silver Mist walked in and tapped her hoof on the ground.
"Soarin, Thunderlane, get onstage now! " She stormed out of the tent, fuming.
"We'd better go, Thunderlane," Soarin said.
Then he added with a grin, "Before she flies away on her broomstick." Wildfire chuckled quietly.
"Go get em', tiger," she said with a wink. Soarin walked over to her, and kissed her forehead gently.
He ran out of the tent, and onto the half-darkened stage. Silver Mist stood on the other side, with the limelight beaming down on her. Mares and gentlecolts alike were gathered in the meadow. The audience was spilt in two sections: Public seating, which was about thirty feet from the stage, and the V.I.P. section, twelve feet away. Thunderlane stood near the stage; His part of the performance started in the middle of the routine. Soarin quickly scanned the crowd, in curiosity of whether or not one of the Wonderbolts came to the show.
That's when he saw her. Seated in the front row, in between a light blue pegasus and an orange earth pony, was a purple unicorn with dazzling, violet eyes. Her mane was a very dark blue, with a streak of pink in the middle. Soarin felt his breath taken away by this stunning mare. Good thing the lights weren't on him yet, because he could tell that he was smiling like an idiot. He forced himself to stop smiling, and tried to look professional.
"And now, our final act of the night," Silver Mist announced to the audience. "I proudly introduce, our finale, performed by Soarin!"
Silver Mist leaped off the stage, and the limelight fixed on Soarin, unveiling the pegasus. He cleared his throat, and looked at the unicorn mare again. Her eyes met with his. She stared at him and smiled with raw excitement.
His mind was made up.
Nopony or not, he mused. This is my moment. This is my chance. And I'll show her, and all of Equestria, who I truly am.
The music began, and he spread out his wings and took flight, ready to amaze the beautiful mare that watched him soar.