Steamed and Pressed

by Steam Punk

Rating: teen
Tags: Adventure, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Alternate Universe, Rainbow Dash, Other, Original Character, Comedy
Length: 11917

The Mane 6 pick up a pet project in order to get the elements of Harmony off of an airship.

What would Princess Luna have done if she had been in Celestia's shoes? Roles reversed, the world has an alternate universe where Magic is Jealous of Science. Ponies can literally smell industrialization in the air and what starts out as a movie shoot becomes a quest led by one crazy pony who might not be what she seems, told from the eyes of a blank flank actress named Fancy Fizz.

Published 2013-12-29 22:30:04 UTC
Last updated 2014-01-24 20:25:06 UTC

Fire's Cold Kiss

It was an odd rescue for an actress and a mechanic to perform. This Rainbow Maned stranger, is her name really Rainbow Dash? She was lucky she didn't crash into the waste disposal unit’s opening but actually stopped just short of the lid. Oh it made me sick thinking about having to pull her out of the green glowing ooze. Toot Suite didn't dwell on such thoughts, dumping her on across my withers. She and I carried her to the public laboratory. Surely not as spacious as our boudoir but it had certain amenities, a doctor’s kit for one and a chemical steamer which according to the headmaster needed adjustment so that the radiation could be ionized without giving anypony a close shave along with it. She just opened her other saddlebag containing a small ladylike kit for emergencies. Her goggles narrowed in on a blade of grass. The state of her hair and pulled a twig from its tangles.

“This pony was nowhere near Manehatten,” she surmised, pulling me out of my thoughts. “Fancy, please take a look at this lab sample, does this look like typical radiation to you?”

Basic rules of society first, no up-do, no clean shoes, no service, and it was not just the main rule at Filly Finishing school. Everpony kept their grooming trim and proper for a reason, if not for most importantly of all, horse hair is highly flammable. To please the ponies at the front gates I took out of the saddlebag a simple pork-pie hat. My forelocks tucked inside it as each of us dawned our aprons. It satisfied the lab ponies a little and curbed the stares. I adjusted the microscope, biting my lip. The slide showing the lock of hair had organic deposits of healthy gardening soil actually and the green flecks of ooze. It was typical bark found in trees. The green ooze and soot was recent, only forty eight hours old. According to Rainbow Fruit, he lost his wig forty-eight hours ago.

“My word,” I gasped, “Toot Suite, if you would be a dear, the adjustments needed for chemical steamer. They aren't needed for complete ooze.”

Toot Suite scowled in my direction. She complained about all those adjustments she made prior to asking me to look at a lab sample. Turning the gauge controls again. The little needles squeaked across the white in glassed in frames. Steam hissed out of nooks and crannies hemmed together by brass nuts and bolts. She swiped the water away from her fogged up goggles. Instead of angering her, I showed her my findings by hooking the microscope up to the projector. She pursed her lips. Eyes twinkling in the low light.

“Oh sure it looks like garden soil.” She snorted, “Or she could’ve bashed her way through the potted plants of our movie set?” She nickered, “Let’s just set the Chemical Steamer on Deep Clean. Put our colorful pal inside and set the timer to “Thorough””

“But the poor dear ran out screaming,” I begged, “What if she’s still in that panicked state when she wakes up?”

Toot Suite shrugged. With the chemical steamer being as temperamental as it was there was no choice but to wait it out. Cloth napkin laid flat I sprawled out an apology in as permanent ink as possible. I did not wish to be rude to the little gem as I tossed it inside. Toot Suite on the other hand skipped all bedside manners as she unceremoniously dumped the mare into the chamber.

Rainbow Dash was just beginning to stir when the door aching shut. Rainbow’s face snapped alert. Pounding on the porthole window, yelling to be let back outside, I held up another sign with I’m sorry written in large cursive letters. Toot Suite on the other hand nibbled her crumpet, watching the pony start to fight her way out. Karate chops here a roundhouse kick there.
I looked on sadly. Rainbow Dash twirled inside the chemical steamer like a shaken up fly. Her flapping wings accompanying multiple thuds.

Toot Suite sipped deeply at her tea. With thirty minutes left to go on the chemical bath. Rainbow Dash’s stamina was quite strong. She’d been fighting for several hours.

“My deepest apologies,” I called out sweetly. Again, waking up in a strange environment must be traumatizing, tiny space even more so for an athlete that’s obsessive compulsive on flight.

“There’s no use trying to vocalize anything to her,” explained Toot Suite around a mouthful of crumpet, “The windows are soundproof and thick so that the steam and radiation doesn't leak out.”

“But surely she’ll hurt herself again,” I cried.

“Your savior will be fine,” Toot Suite stated, checking her watch, “Please scoot the tea set over and open the window. If my calculations are correct and I open the doorway just a smudge.”

A rainbow came blasting out of the building. Throw me aghast this pony was wired to explode. Her speed sent dirigibles careening out of control. She looped dipped skidded sideways. Grabbing the nearest binoculars I galloped to get a better view.

Toot Suite however went flapping out the window. Where Rainbow Dash’s flight was a tumultuous array of dives and flips Toot Suite lazily glided along the Airship airways, banking shy of the zeppelin’s great girth. I couldn't quite hear what the two were saying. One of Toot Suite’s littler machines, the sonic ear, fit easily into any hat. I took the funnel out of the saddlebag and adjusted it onto my own hat. Ears tucked inside, I could hear everything that was being said.

Toot Suite seemed to be talking the crazed pony down. Yet it only seemed to make her more upset as time went by.

“This is not supposed to be happening to me!” Rainbow Dash cried.

“Now please Ms. Dash I know this may not feel right but I promise you industrialization is highly normal,” Toot Suite began.

“But not for me!” Rainbow Dash whined, “Where’s my house! My Friends!”

She fell to the clouds. Face hidden in her forelegs, her shoulders shook with every held back sob.

“Where’s Ponyville?” Rainbow Dash sniffed, “I want to go home.”

“Oh dear,” Toot Suite stammered.

“Oh dear,” I repeated.

Somepony out there might have wished for a pint of barley beer right about now or have more choice words that I was taught not to repeat in the presence of such gentle-colts and ladies. I dropped the binoculars. In a fit of anger I bucked at the wall, a little angry the mystery only deepened with our resident mad pony. She was the key to the strange incident on the set of our new movie. If we didn't get to the bottom of this then there might not be another Daring Do movie. I really tried my best for that role as Daring Do. I didn't want to waste all of everyone’s hard work for nothing.

Bells jingled at the door to the public laboratory. Pushing the tea tray back in its place, I ripped the packaging off of a fresh tea bag marked chamomile and filled the untouched teacup with hot water. The instant steep tea dyed its terrine home pitch brown. My crumpet lay untouched. Too worried was I to think about what could happen to that mad pony. She could have punctured a weather balloon with those front hooves or worse! Zeppelins tended to be large bags of hot air from what I know. One rupture would not only bash open the blimp on many unsuspecting Manehattenites. Rainbow Dash could have become Rainbow Scald. Inner temperatures of the Dirigibles are enough to fry chicken. I’d hate to see fried horse.

I shuddered at that last ghastly image. Crispy critter thoughts pushed my appetite away. I didn't see Rainbow Dash collapse on an adjacent chair. Her wings alerted me first to her presence. In Filly Finishing school some of my pegasi friends rarely remained still and the more energetic ones tended to hover. High energy and open air practically screamed the freedom of flight. Gusted wing flaps as she tried to balance on the uncomfortable chair.

I swiveled around the wheeled stool and put on the break saying, “Here take my chair.”

Rainbow Dash complied without a single pause. Her locked gaze showing the red rims of her tear stained eyes. She wobbled slightly, surprised at the lack of backing. Her wings had complete and free will to flap for balance. Her hooves scraped the metal stool. She arced her neck back and wiggled. Okay so our chairs had some modifications. Industrialization did bring many a creature comfort. Her wings locked to her sides. Gaze slowly looking over the tea set than to the chemical steamer. She stared at me, free of all makeup, no costume and no cosmetics whatsoever. I did make for a very unimpressive pony.

“Are you alright?” I started up the conversation tentatively.

Toot Suite fluttered in a little later. Her industrious humming as she rhythmically cleaned the lab. Documentations made in the public lab ledger. With Toot Suite cleaning that left me to keep an eye on our little foundling. Rainbow Dash laughed to hide the stressed crack in her voice.

“I’m the Rainbow Dash, Wonderbolt candidate, Awesomeness extraordinaire and you’re asking me if I’m okay?” Rainbow Dash bragged, “That’s the dumbest thing I've ever heard. What makes you think I need help.”

“You were sobbing because you couldn't see your house from up there. You just stood three feet away from a waste disposal unit breathing in toxic chemicals and after everything we’d done for you, sorry to be harsh but does flying into the harm’s way of oncoming traffic sound like you are all right to yourself?” I pondered, “You seemed raving mad.”

“You forgot fighting off a much needed bath,” Toot Suite added, “Oh wait one more thing, you crashed into a wall and cut off the route of several Royal Air-Navy Blimps.” She scoffed, “Not in that same order but even lab tests show you’re kind of out of your element.”

“My element is loyalty!” Rainbow Dash snapped.

I sat the proffered tea down in front of Rainbow Dash before the argument escalated into a fight.

“Ladies please,” I mustered shakily, “Ms. Dash this is Toot Suite and my name is Fancy Fizz. What she means is when you appeared out of nowhere on our movie set.” Rainbow Dash’s eyes widened in recognition as she remembered the fake jungle from before, “Yes that jungle. When you appeared on scene, you looked just like the actor and stunt double for our movie. We thought you were just acting and didn't know you were even in distress.”

“We didn't know we’d have a character literally trot out of the silver screen,” Toot Suite added, “What did you do before coming here? What is your world like? How did you get here? How are you going to get back?”

Toot Suite was a scientist first, ladylike bedside manner second. Rainbow Dash chugged the cup of tea and plowed her face through the basket of crumpets instead of the dainty one in front of her. Toot Suite quirked a brow over her clipboard. Quill in tooth she noted Rainbow Dash’s table manners. I glimpsed a ven diagram comparing her to our good male friend Rainbow Fruit. There wasn't much of a difference between the two counterparts. One was very in touch with his feminine side. The other was a real actual mare with a girlishness but not as profound, and raising her meter from Mad Pony to country bumpkin.

“That’s easy,” Rainbow Dash babbled, “I was helping Daring Do get the totem of paradox. My world is way cooler than yours. I don’t know how I got here and duh, of course I know how to get back I’ll ask my friends!”

Somewhere in the background the chemical steamer let off hot air akin to the deflation of a party balloon. Crickets chirped to their comedic intents. While Toot Suite’s deadpan gaze smoldered its target, Rainbow Dash clacked her hooves nervously together. Her eyes taking in everything else but the two ponies sitting before her. I marveled at the colors of her mane and how they seemed to change, whichever way she turned her head.

These little mannerisms I’ll have to keep saved in my personal persona for later. Between Toot Suite’s cool calculating ways and Rainbow Dash’s high strung habits, it gave me a better understanding on what Daring Do was like. What habits did she keep under control and what endearing traits made for a highly fetching pony.

I shook my head of such thoughts, being a pony seeing myself on stage was just weird but if I acted too much like one pony or the other than the acting could come off a bit forced. It makes the actress seem garish and alien even unto themselves. To appreciate old things usually meant respect and manners. I didn't want to drive Rainbow Dash away if she caught me mimicking a few of her nervous habits.

“Uh yeah,” Rainbow dash reiterated her tone again, “On second thought I might need somepony to tell me what the hay is going on.”

Talking betwixt just us, Toot Suite and I, we watched as Rainbow Dash darted in circles. It made me dizzy watching her. Toot Suite, saddle bags in place, trotted with that forced grace the Air Navy expected of all their soldiers. She didn't take off because within those saddlebags sat the marvelous Fake Wings. She didn't dare want to let down her guard.

“Tootsie,” I asked sweetly, “Are you sure it’s alright helping a complete stranger?”

Rainbow Dash was too busy gluing her face to the Dirigible windows. Half of her awestruck at the view below and half of her itching for open skies. Rainbow Dash knew how to make a scene. She interrupting the flight route of one of the commanding officer’s prized warships, S.S. Selena. Toot Suite didn't answer me for a time. Hoof clops and wing flaps puncturing the silence for several minutes. As soon as Rainbow Dash was good and distracted she hup-turned on one hoof, standing at attention. I merely stood back out of habit to give her wings room to move but she stood wing-locked. A sign of either extreme fear or controlled fury.

“It is not merely helping Fancy. I heard the word Paradox and our resident Mad Pony just brushed attentions with her alter ego on this plane of existence.” She hissed, “They didn't recognize each other.”

“And you pulled some extreme strings to take this complete and utter stranger to the princess why?” I inquired.

Toot Suite set her gaze to the floor. Her dusty blue hoof on the ornate door, glancing at Rainbow Dash’s squeaky attempts to allow herself inside Toot Suite and I together heaved the door open. Rainbow Dash zoomed inside. Her aerial dips and twirls catching the attention of all the merchants and mechanics. Her aerial acrobatics were a beautiful sight. Toot Suite’s steely expression broke only to here her whispers.

“Assets and setbacks. Asset? Rainbow Dash is connected to the incident at the movie set and is quite staunch in morale. We scratch her back, she scratches ours. Setback . . . eh . . .” Toot Suite nickered, “About that . . .”

Rainbow Dash folded her wings only to plop onto the table. Its slick lacquer made for slippery purchase. Rainbow Dash struggled to her hooves. Her wings slapped still to her sides. She peeped nervously around the crowd. She brightened upon the sight of one recognized figure. The Princess! In all her regalia, eyes nonplussed. This strange pony approached the princess not on hoof but by way of a long lost friend.

“Princess Luna, you’re okay!” she cheered, “Remember me?”

The princess’s teal orbs wavered back and forth. Her bout between containing Nightmare Moon and ultimately slaying the monster who sealed away her sister did not leave her unchanged. Her lacquer blue coat mottled with the spots down her forelegs and to her flank. Spots surrounded by a silvery moonlit ring. She raised her wings or as the legends say Nightmare Moon’s wings. The black, silver encircled blaze splashed upon her muzzle was not just a pretty coat pattern but a scar from that beast trying to devour her from the inside out. Everyone in school had been taught this. Her mane took on the violent cloud of a solar nebula darkened by the strain of the night. Her silver finery turned lavender. The black stocking markings of her legs started to spread up as blackness started to engulf her body.

“Rainbow Dash,” I hissed, “Watch your tongue please, please, please.”

Rainbow Dash’s eyes wavered fearfully. The princess Luna’s innocent teal reflection of what she used to be so many years before devouring Nightmare Moon pelted against the surface. Rainbow Dash paid no heed to the surface. She curled up, scooting away in fear as Luna’s shadow grew larger and larger.

“Come on Luna you remember me. Twilight’s friend Wah-we-we celebrated Nightmare Night together,” Rainbow Dash begged,

“Come on it’s me. You've just gotta remember me. I-I-I I’m Rainbow Dash.”

Luna’s lofty silhouette chuckled evilly. The maniacal cackle of Nightmare Moon stained its fanged lips.

“. . . Get out . . .” Luna warned.

“Oh no,” I cried. Toot Suite cursed under her breath.

“B-b-but Princess,” chimed in Rainbow Dash.

“Out!” Luna snapped, snorting smoke.

“You . . . don’t remember me . . .” she paused fearfully.

Luna’s fanged mouth opened wreathed in fire. The glowing white consumed her cat eyed gaze. Toot Suite and I grabbed the distraught pony. The room’s temperature skyrocketed.

“OOOOOOUUUUUUTTT!” The Princess howled.

Fire licked at our flanks. Lightning swirled up the ashes. Cracks creaked beneath our hooves. The trio we had fled. We didn't see Luna’s anger give way in an instant. The Merchants had clung for dear life to the ceiling.

She stood alone in the scorched and derelict ruins. Ears pinned back she fell to her haunches. Merchants agreeing to her deals quickly just to avoid roasting alive but she paid no heed. She slumped to the floor. Tears hissing into steam before even hit the floor. Shoulders shook. The innocent Princess Luna reflection that no one paid attention to sobbed. Her shadow laughed gleefully.
Yet the Princess herself showed neither sides of weakness. The Princess drew herself high, her gaze steeled. She had to put on a brave front. The Merchants who couldn’t trust her only agreed to her because she commanded such power. And it was this haughty determination that kept any and all oppressors in line.

Meanwhile the three little ponies stopped at the opposite end of the entire zeppelin. Rainbow Dash fell to her back. Shock sucked the energy from her limp slumping form. Toot Suite used a marble column for support. I flung myself across the nice, heavenly cold floor.

“Okay, I’m convinced,” surrendered Toot Suite, “You are definitely from an alternate universe. You’re not as crazy as we thought.”

“What!” Rainbow Dash squeaked.

“Everypony knows that from the combination of devouring Nightmare Moon, her soul duty of raising both the sun and the moon with the help of Nightmare Moon’s added might, topped with the sun’s influence upon her magic.” I wheezed, licking my lips, I just suddenly had the oddest craving for peppermint sherbet, “Basically our Princess Luna developed the ability to breathe Fire.”

“And you waited until now to tell me this!” she shrieked.

“Yes,” Toot Suite laughed hysterically, “Even a resident Mad Pony knows not to fudge with the sun and the moon!”

“Tootsie,” I growled, “Watch your language, please.”

“Well next time don’t wait until afterwards to bucking tell me!” Rainbow Dash hissed back, “If that’s Princess Luna than where the hay is Princess Celestia?”

We exchanged a glance. Did she really want to know the awful truth? One hailed Taxi balloon later, we walked the Manehatten streets to a lone park. In the center laid a memorial. Ash and grime dirtied its features. Yet as the marble statue held Rainbow Dash swiped a wing across the bronze plaque. Dust had winded away.

Here lies the Body of Princess Celestia
Pray her smile shine down upon us from her soul sealed in the sun.

Toot Suite and I sat on either side of the rainbow maned pony who laid curled up at Princess Celestia’s marble feet. Toot Suite didn't have a dry comment to speak of this time. In hind sight, that very power is why everyone feared the Princess, it is only how she earned our respect by holding equestrian together did she finally stop shutting herself away in Canterlot. Rainbow Dash startled from my hoof stroking her back in an innocent gesture of comfort. Toot Suite’s wings draped over her saddlebags.

“I’m terribly sorry,” I apologized, “I never got to know your friends or your princess but if they’re anything like you. They must be . . . quite heroic . . . in their own right.”

“So where do we go from here?” Toot Suite asked, “Until I have more Data I can’t build anything to aid us.”

“My talents are only athletic,” Rainbow Dash added, “Not including I’m awesome but I don’t know what I can contribute and wait isn't being an impostor more your thing.”

“I’m an actress,” I stated, “And just because my flank doesn't reflect my current occupation per say doesn't mean I don’t have any useful contributions. I have an appreciation for old things and~ a knack for.” And on another note added, “You are correct in the glorified impostor bit. Let’s see whoever I can butter up to help us.”

Author's Note

I feel pretty bad for making quite a bit of heartache. Rainbow Dash is canon. Toot Suite and Fancy Fizz? . . . Now I know why Ponies don't include themselves into the scientific process.

Following the Moon

Princess Luna held her composure just long enough to go through the motions. Her secretary talking her through the fine print twice, Pen in mouth, she signed the triplicate. She shook hooves with everypony, even the merchants of Flim Flam Industries, and Barnyard Bargains despite the stares. Just as soon as she waved good bye to the last pony standing she teleported out. A cobalt flash in her wake, her wings down turned just a smidge. She bolted the skyways making it to one very important place right in the heart of Manehatten.

Cherry Blossoms battled for vibrancy amidst the stone and earth toned grime. Lovers rubbed noses on a nearby bench. One enthusiastic jogger danced to no tune but one’s own. Aviation headset tuned into built in speakers. A group of giggling mares just in their final year of Filly Finishing school waved at the cantering Princess. She knew where they were from judging by the school uniforms of a puffy sleeved flouncy blouse and Edwardian skirt. Princess Celestia’s School for Gifted Unicorns was a rival to their own sister school. She made a mental note to visit Canterlot and inspect the school herself. If Professor Inkwell’s warnings of a spy among the faculty were true, than a war to be prevented between the Griffins and the Dragons could put Equestria into Civil unrest because the east coast of Equestria had the best battlefield for unimpeded dog fights and everywhere from the Hayseed Swamps to the hilly ranges beyond Manehatten had cities and nomadic settlements up and down its borders.

All thoughts of the outside world took a backburner when Princess Celestia entered the gilded arch to the marble gazebo. Celestia’s statuette body stood behind its gilded plaque. Luna opened a small garden shed to the side taking out rakes, brooms, and several cleaning supplies. She laughed relishing in the clutter she caused by accidentally dropping them all over the marble floor.

“Oh sister you wouldn’t believe the stressful day I’ve been having,” she started chattering immediately, “I don’t know how you do it Sister. Watching your tongue around the picky ambassadors, the merchants were trying to build a machine to take over my job. Their underhanded business dealings had already shoved around the entire society of Equestria. I am not going to let good ponies get fired, not if I have a say in it.”

Princess Celestia’s stone cut face hadn’t said a single word. She stood stock still despite her sister rolling her eyes. For a thousand years she kept trying to tell herself her sister was a statue now, she can’t hear, that was the Nightmare Moon’s logic talking. The jealous adult that stood jaded against all this disorder that infested what was supposed to be a perfect kingdom. Though a little reflection of hope was whispering in her ear, the teal haired childlike voice that whispered all of its nervousness of her insecurities and fears, this small part of her felt comfort in talking to her marbleized sister. She came to the gazebo every night, cleaning it up, washing it down with only her bare hooves and very little magic.

“Still the strangest thing happened today,” Luna quipped, matter of fact, “I had gotten the warmest welcome from a friend I had never met before.” She shuddered at the thought of what happened next. “And I had an accident and we all know what happens when I have an accident.”

Her fiery breath had been rearing its ugly head lately. Last Hearts and Hooves day she’d gotten a marriage proposal from a dragon of all creatures because she blew a seventy foot tall pillar of flame into the sky. She didn’t know Pinkie Pie loved tabasco sauce on her cupcakes so much that she decided to bake habanero peppers inside them with fourteen cups of curry powder. To say the local hospital was graced with the Fire Department’s presence was the understatement of the year. Hearth’s Warming Eve, another disaster, she learned never to chortle near a gas main. During Nightmare Night was when she finally started to gain control of her flame. Tried to light a candle with her nose and ended up flambéing the entire table.

“Luckily,” Luna sighed in relief, “One of my soldiers was nearby, Private Toot Suite. Mechanic in our heavy artillery division, sniping and cover fire technician I believe. Shame I did not recognize the rainbow maned Pegasus even though I should! I know everypony by face and/or name here in Equestria and if there is one face that is out of place!”

She paused in her sweeping, the shadows seemed longer than when she first entered. Its signs telling her time flew by quickly.

“I will need to assign somepony to find out more about her not just anypony, considering the fiasco of sending Flim and Flam as ambassadors to the Zebra Nation upon my negligence.” She sighed and in her worry started sweeping more aggressively, “Toot Suite is a low ranking officer I could just bypass all ranks with my authority and order her to spill her guts out for me.”

The wind rattled in response. Luna took it as a sign of discouragement. Princess Celestia would never muck in the affairs of mortals no matter how intriguing. Nightmare Moon could command power with a flick of her mane. Luna knew she could do that but Little Luna at least cared for the mortals, it was her duty and loyalty that kept her strong in all those years yet gone was the little Filly whose voice was so soft even introductions would come out as a squeak. She stopped her sweeping, dropped her broom and sighed.

“Oh Sister I wish you were here,” she stated, it was clockwork, the confession spilling from her lips just like every other visit, “What I did was wrong and I am so ashamed.” Eyes glistened with unshed tears. “Equestria deserves better than the moon.”

One final task, the bucket and cloth levitated at her telepathic behest. Her mind felt a little numbed. All these years of wiping the grime from Celestia’s sealed body. What looked back at her was simply a statue. She wished could do more but she didn’t know how. She didn’t have the Elements of Harmony to reverse the spell.

“It deserves the Sun and the Moon working together.” Luna finished, “If we didn’t seal the Elements of Harmony back into the Tree of Harmony after facing all our perils before my jealousy got the better of me than maybe-no-no that’s not right. That’s in the past. You always told me even if yesterday is awful, tomorrow is a new day.”

Luna pursed her lips musing over the curious thought. For so many years she dreamed of having ponies appreciate her night, appreciate her. She forgot that when one eldest sister moves out of a house. The youngest could get all the attention and the responsibilities that went with it. Being flocked by dignitaries, the royal guard standing to obey her every whim. One word could put anypony in the line of fire. One request could rub the wrong way or be spun a thousand more different ways with the help of a single picture.

“Farewell to thee my sun kissed sister,” Luna recited, taking her leave.

The sun was still in its descent across the sky. Luna took up her crown and with it all the worries and fears that came with ruling a nation. Her heartbeat fluttered lighter than before as she strode the cherry blossom path. The fountain gurgled in a corner. The jogger long since jogged away. Two lovers lost in each other’s eyes failed to notice the princess walk by. The students from the Filly Finishing School laughed splendidly enjoying their game.

Princess Luna herself felt her head held up a bit higher as the sun shined down. She couldn’t stare into its brilliance but felt the warmth. Almost imagining it as a hug from a warm and compassionate presence she clutched a hoof to her chest feeling Celestia’s warm spirit. She opened her eyes in surprise the sun extended the shadows from the tree line making it fall across her spotted back. Casting a wary glimpse skyward she allowed herself one small freedom to not be the timid Princess Luna or the indomitable Nightmare Moon.

“May we meet again as friends,” Luna finished reciting.

For a moment she was just a younger sister wanting her big buddy to come back home.

Author's Note

What does anyone think about this version of Luna? I wanted to keep the bare bones there. I might add more to this chapter, maybe covering Twilight and Spike.

Bets made in a Museum

“Ms. Dash please keep yourself grounded while in the museum, you break it, there’s no replacements and FANCY!” Toot Suite shrieked.

The little squeak followed by a loud crash was me. Toot Suite opened the closet’s door. I laid upside down entangled in brooms and mops. Rainbow Dash bared her back hooves against the wall while trying to tug her head out of the bucket. Toot Suite let loose a discontented sigh. Her last words muttering something about a broom closet.

“Are you well?” To Suite asked brow furrowed in concern, “Yes, I know this is a stupid question to ask but it only seems appropriate in this situation. I would've gone and got the broom after that but it appears the entire broom closet found you.”

“My bad,” Rainbow Dash groaned. With a final yank, she fell into my lap. Caged by broomsticks and mop handles we fell out into a heap across the darkened floor.

. . . Then again . . . Rainbow Dash and I made quite the smashing duet of clumsiness now that I think about it. I carried the saddlebags containing the precious mechanical props.

“Yes quite,” I coughed, “My fault as well but still, Tootsie be a dear, and help us up won’t you please?”

Handles clattered, cleaning supplies rattled and the little mechanic who pulled us to our hooves ruffled her wings as she fretted over the ponies she cared about before worrying over the inventions. Rainbow Dash with a little twist of her noggin removed her impromptu helmet. The mop bucket clanked to the floor eyes widened. Pupils competed with the size of dinner plates.

"Are you well Ms. Dash," I chirruped tentatively.

Meanwhile Rainbow Dash staunchly flickered forward. Her eyes taking in the sights and sounds with barely an ear flick. Ionic architecture opened up amphitheater style to a glorious blue sky. Large machines and even bigger skeletons of prehistoric beasts were each on their own foot tall pedestal surrounded by poles fenced with velveteen ropes. A placard of similar information about each exhibit stood by the displays. The large court yard every six feet had a glassed in box held smaller objects on filly eye level pedestal with the placard beneath it.

Rainbow Dash soared. Prismatic trail blurred in her wake. Wings mightily pumped thrice to meet such clear skies. Only for her hooves to meet solid concrete. The factory floor and industrial ceiling flickered when the hologram projector started to smoke and whir. Toot Suite yanked a wrench from nearby and undid the tension. The boiler powering the device spouted steam causing Toot Suite's hair to frizz, into a puff. A multi-colored puffy cloud coiffure bubbled from the steam. Rainbow Dash pawed at the ceiling trying to dig her way out to open air only to buck it causing the security pony to snap.

"Hey! No breaking the artifacts!" he shouted, "Ceiling is property of the Equestrian Society History Museum only!"

"Bite me!" Rainbow Dash snapped back and the few witnesses there stood aghast. Air Sailor talk is strictly left on the air ships and yes Ms. Dash was taking her frustrations out on the poor passersby, it still fell under taboo to be rude. Victorian sensibilities merely a veneer as it were.

Rainbow Dash opened her wings as she swooped into a back flip. Such grace in her aerial descent. She flapped her wings very hard while she hoovered to my left. The withering glare planted on the poor stranger. She landed haughtily. Her huffiness dismissed with a downward glance. Toot Suite and I exchanged looks between us over her withers. The pony trotting between us, head bowed, wings dragging the ground in her misery, why it was the most heart wrenching pity wallowing I'd ever seen.

"It's not fair," Rainbow Dash bit out, "Nothing around here is fair!"

"What isn't fair?" I inquired. Mind us, we were afraid to ask. A stranger from another world? Our universe is industrialized. Who wouldn't the smell of hot coals and warm tea be unfair?

"The sky is supposed to be the SKY! Not some see-through picture of the sky. Smokestacks fill the horizon with so much smoke I can't tell which is a good cloud to land on or which isn't. The streets are covered in soot. The brickwork is boring and why isn't anypony breaking into song over how unmagical this place is. Why didn't you tell me Luna breathes fire? Which is actually kind of cool but, where's Ponyville! Where's Twilight, Rarity, Spike, Fluttershy, and Applejack?" She seethed, "Where's Zephyr Breeze?"

Rainbow Dash caught herself whimpering, "Ohmigosh, ohmigosh, oh my heck no! . . . I'm missing stuck up lazy Zephyr Bree!"

She choked on her own spit before releasing a scream of fury. Then catching her breath again. Her wings popped open as she threw herself to a dinosaur's feet. Hooves flailing in the latest of at least a dozen panic tantrums.

"My world is OVEEERRRRRRRRRR!" She screeched, her voice nearly cracking in volume.

To which another couple turned to her and whispered, "Shhhhhh."

A tug on her hoof had Rainbow Dash popping her head up. Everypony was staring. By the time she noticed all eyes upon her Rainbow Dash picked herself up. The cyan pony traced circles in the floor. Toot Suite busily ran a brush through her mane until it was smoothed. Of course Tootsie's brush was mainly a plank of bristles hovering on a tiny helicopter. She did pretty good working joystick remote control between her hoof and mouth. I casually shrug my shoulders and bit back a giggle. I couldn't keep my lips from dropping into a frown.

"heh-heh," Rainbow Dash smiled, pink in her cheeks, "sorry."

Toot Suite sighed modestly. The things stuffed back into her saddlebags. She trotted up to Rainbow Dash calmly. The pony flinched at a hoof by her shoulder. Toot Suite was gentle about her thoughts however.

"It would be scientifically inefficient to bottle up your frustrations," she tried to reassure the fellow Pegasus, "But must you make every problem a pestilence?"

"Express?" I coughed out, "Rainbow Dash's mood swings are amazing." I'd wilted sadly under Ms. Dash's grimance, "I mean you do have such a broad range of expressions Ms. Dash. Considering the circumstances could you zip one lap around the museum exhibits?"

"But the ceiling is too low, and I might hit a pipe," Rainbow Dash exclaimed.

"Oh . . ." I wilted under Rainbow Dash's gaze, ears pinned flat against my neck, of all the bright ideas, "Fly low or do whatever adjustments you need. One quick lap through the exhibit might help hmm smooth out the twitches and I'll meet you both at the exit."

"Fancy you're crazy," Toot Suite interjected, "You know the flight would be slow going, tedious, and oh." Realization dawned across her features, "Oh right, right, whelp it's your turn to stack this next piece of the puzzle Fancy why don't you charm up your old contacts. Rainbow Dash and I will do some recon and meet you at the exit only if that's okay with you Ms. Dash?"

"Fine whatever," Rainbow Dash huffed zipping ahead, "But cut it with the formalities, would ya? It feels, weird somehow."

Toot Suite balked at the claim. Her wings all a twitter.

"I-I am not being formal," she stuttered, "I am being professional Ms. Dash."

"See there you go again!" Rainbow Dash yelled out.

I watched my two companions fly away. Rainbow Dash's noisy chatter sometimes interrupted with a sharp comment from Toot Suite. The flight was slow going as predicted, winding around brass pipes disguised as cumulus nimbus. Toot Suite's easy banking versus Rainbow Dash's flips and dives. The flight would let the two Pegasi burn off much needed steam.

It allowed me time to think. Mechanization and good snap decisions were up Toot Suite's and Ms. Dash's alley as being mares of action. Yet I couldn't help noticing the differences. Browsing without really looking at the placards, I had a cache of acting experience under my belt playing roles normally meant for Unicorns and Pegasi. As an Earth Pony myself I had to research the other species found in Equestria trying to take on their mannerisms and behavior patterns temporarily in order to step into their horseshoes.

As it were the mysterious visitor confounded me. I didn't know her as intimately as I did Toute Suite, the ponies I was in the makeup room with and Rainbow Fruit who was a wig and mane extension away from looking like Rainbow Dash. Except he happens to be an exceptionally effeminate male and I doubt that would be a good comparison to find answers. Hoof tips tapping impatiently I wandered past the mirror exhibit thinking, if I needed to find Rainbow Dash's problem than maybe I'd needed to find a bit more research from what she has told us.

"Hmm-hmm-hum let's see," I mumbled meandering through the exhibits from Pop Culture to Ancient History, "Rainbow Dash, she's complained about a lack of open skies and the smog disrupting the cloud banks."

I passed by the air pirate exhibit. Imagining her all decked out for a night at the breezes. Knife in her teeth. Bandanna taming her unkempt locks. She could be plundering, looting and stealing maybe? She's adventurous yes but the ponies in the air navy who had taken up to fighting with knives get several nicks and cuts around their lips. Rainbow Dash had just crashed into a pipe with a loud clang. Make that unable to literally navigate the machinery as well. The Pegasi had turned to making their air ships a weather based engine system instead of using runes and Gems. The cloud factories have excess jarred lightning.

"No she is not an air pirate she doesn't like industry and the air buccaneers make a profit stealing from the rich to sell overpriced to the poor," I concluded to no one in particular, "She did say she was famous, maybe she is a singer?"

I popped passed the Pop Culture exhibit again. There was a hall of fame for celebrity tabloids. Sadly as I trotted by each piece my heart hung heavier with disappointment. None of the pictures above each pedestal matched Rainbow Dashes prismatic appearance. The names on the Pedestals did not say Rainbow Dash. I nipped up a brochure. They'd listed party after party after party.

"Now what group did Rainbow Dash say she was in? The Wonderbolts?" I mused, "That group does not exist. Does it?"

"No it doesn't," yelled Toute Suite in the distance.

In an exasperated sigh I closed my eyes. I bowed my head. There is an answer. It is grounded in some form of science, magic, or technology.

"Yes it does!" Rainbow Dash yelled back.

I bit my lip anxiously knowing Rainbow Dash sounded like she was telling the truth. Yet her stories matched none of the evidence laid before me. Museums are supposed to be the easiest lanes of research in the world. All someone had to do was plug in those little gray cells. Pick a topic and search. It's too bad a stallion named Google got beat to the idea of public knowledge first. If all else fails maybe the library?

"Oh no!!" Rainbow Dash yelled.

A piece of pottery broke somewhere. I galloped, panicked at what I'd find. I slammed the doors open. My saddlebags flopped heavily against my barrel. My insides heaved for air. Panic setting in.

"Do you have any sixes?" Rainbow Dash asked.

"Go fish," Toute Suite declared.

Rainbow Dash smashed a hoof down. She glared at the coffee mug clinking on the table. With a grimance she dragged her hoof along the table to her hand of cards. Ears pricked forward in delight. Her cheeks straining against her gigantic grin. She reared up, sending cards everywhere the table flipped over. The cramped little closet couldn't hold her wide expressive movements.

"Wahoo! I win!" she wooped, her cheer causing several people to shush her, she cringed and shrunk back into her seat. The saloon exhibit featured a live movie setting of sorts, (I played the waitress for that Prone Wayne film then). The guests could pretend to be cowpokes sitting around a real oak table playing cards and sipping carbonated apple soda from Cider Mugs just for the experience. The only thing not letting Rainbow Dash sink into the dusty wood floor was the chair. "Whoops . . . sorry."

Her tail was still wagging in the background. Dust clouds kicked up into coughing card players faces. Rainbow Dash's wide eyes watered piteously. Her lip jutted out past her snout. The look on her face bargaining 'Maybe if I act adorable. I'd be too cute for trouble.

I blinked back the dust from my eyes and politely smiled in return. Forgive the sneeze. Ms. Dash had been in many a cramped area lately. Any time she stretched out a wing wrong she accidentally knocks off hats. Toute Suite set the table back up. She shuffled the cards back to their normal area.

Toute Suite's pressed lips twisted into a thoughtful frown, "So it seems. What did you find out exactly Fancy? Any news?"

"Only that I can never leave you two alone together sometimes," I concluded, "Other than that there is nothing around here or that I know of that proves evidences of Rainbow Dash's existence unless you try magic or confronting the princess a second time."

"I doubt that would help," Toot Suite cut in, "Princesses lead busy lives."

"Actually, if you'd pardon the drool Ms. Dash," I piped up.

I nipped the brochure hanging from the outer saddlebag pocket to nudge into her chest. Rainbow Dash spread the brochure out on the table. Posh Ponies shielded their eyes from the flashing cameras in over sized sunglasses. Paparazzi swarming back and forth like a sea of hungry sprites. The smallest photo had been a regal picture of our Princess of the Night. She was quite orderly in her militarized brass jacket hiding the silvery spots that spread up her legs towards her wings.

"She looks sort of like," Rainbow Dash shook her head wildly, "No I refuse to believe it. There is no way Princess Luna is Nightmare Moon at least not anymore."

"Oh I hate politics," I griped, "I mean while it is true Our Fair Luna has had split personality disorder symptoms. In reality it's just I don't know. The two of them? Mashed together?"

"Princess Celestia's soul was banished to the sun," Toute Suite clarified, her eyes closed deep in thought, "But her body and darker half was sealed down here."

"I remember that fairy tale," I stated, "Hands Christmas Cinderson is one of my favorite authors. Why according to legend Nightmare Moon took over Equestria! In that time Nightmare Moon was going to make the whole world be permanently nightfall, of course the Equestrian ponies rose up against Nightmare Moon and the whole ecosystem broke apart because no one was working together."

"Stick to the facts Fancy," Toute Suite snorted with a stomp, "The economy fell APART! Everypony when they get their special talents get it in their head that they know how the world works! Everyone else tried to run Equestria THIER way and They FAILED because Friendship and Teamwork is the only way the world works. Too much infighting and Nightmare Moon had to turn to Luna for help."

"I well," I gulped, "I like the Hands Christmas Cinderson version where everyone . . . agreed . . . and were happy."

"That's not the story I heard," Rainbow Dash snorted, "The Tale of the Two Sisters being forgive and forget. Friendship is Magic? Does any of this ring a bell at all."

"The Tale of The Two Sisters in our world is called Luna's Killer Deal," Toute Suite finished, "Technically with Celestia's body and soul divided between sealing. Luna got it in her thick head that fusing with Nightmare Moon was a grand idea. They're too brains in the same body."

"What about the breathing fire?" Rainbow Dash chimed.

"While Luna is the brains, Nightmare Moon is the brawn, she rebuilt Luna's body almost in her own image and while Moonlight is Luna's specialty it is still reflected sunlight. Nightmare Moon built a tank and let a pacifist take control," Toute Suite informed.

"Tootsie really!" I grumbled, "That is no way to talk about the princess."

"And how is not knowing about Nightmare Moon not a security threat!" Toute Suite growled.

Both Rainbow Dash and I bowed our heads. We found the floor look much more interesting up close than the other thoughts. One thing we could both agree on. Nightmare Moon's reign was only a glimpse but it was quite signifying in its own dangerous right. She was a vengeful mare with the broken heart of a little girl. It was easy to forget a force of nature when you love it despite what all love blinds.

"There is a party where we'll be meeting her," I exclaimed, rushing forward to hold up bowed heads. Offer a hug or two. The atmosphere is getting too thick, "Chin up and flutter on my fair friendlies. Those of you who don't want to meet the Princess, I'll talk to her. At least there will be free food. A chance to catch up with our boss Tootsie. The sooner we solve this the sooner we get back to working on the Daring Do Movie."

Two heads perked up in an instant.

"Free Food?" Toute Suite asked. She wiped the drool on one sleeve.

"We might have to dress up," I warned, "And please don't be sloppy."

Meanwhile Rainbow Dash's brain just shut down. Her eyes widened to compete with twin moons themselves. The star struck wide eyed gaze of a deer caught in the headlights. Oh I did give my two companions explicit instructions about what to expect. We were going to be shopping for dresses. Rainbow Dash twitched. I didn't know I set off a ticking time bomb. We were going to find out at the party.

". . . Daring Do . . ." Rainbow Dash murmured, " . . . movie . . ."

. . . Oh how I fear for whoever gets in her way.

"Why yes Ms. Dash," I stated, "A Daring Do movie and you'll get to meet the cast and crew in the flesh."

Author's Note

I am going to save Rainbow Dash's Nerdy explosion for the next chapter. Please tell me what you think.

Prologue: Strange Interruptions

Author's Note

Pardon the grammer, I just finished this chapter at one in the morning. It'll need adjustments. This story's plot may twist and change over time. More of the mystery will be revealed in the next chapter. It's a steampunk fic I hope others will enjoy.

Prologue: Strange Interruptions

"Curtain Call in five minutes," spared a voice, Toot Suite, a pegasus mare of dark grey eyes and dusty blue coat swung that curly dark pink mane so fast over her withers the bright yellow stripe in it looked like a blur. This special effects pony who worked on machinery in her spare time according to the cutie mark of a wrench stretched across her flank. Unlike the other pegasi I've met she wasn't very competitive and thus didn't have the jealousy and coveting other Pegasi had over the new blimps lazily floating in the skies of Manehatten.

"Thank you, coming!" I stated starting to leave before being pushed back into the main seat.

"Ach, my hard work!" exclaimed the directing pony, "Dahlia Belle, Peridot, get those wings working again. Toot Suite, will she still fly with them?"

"She's good to go." Toot Suite replied, "And they don't fly, only flap."

"Peridot, Daring Do has less eyelashes, use those contacts, Air brush, Where's my hair extensions," Photo Shoot griped, taking the makeover into her own hooves. I struggled for fear of getting false eyelashes in my eyes. Photo Shoot looked at the ponies who just stood there staring agaped.

Toot Suite checked her digital wristwatch asking, "Where are you Fancy? Curtain Call is in three minutes."

"You heard her, now move it!" Photo Shoot cried, "Schnell, schnell!"

There I sat surrounded by a technicolor crew of talented artisans. Photo Shoot with just a clap of her hooves; Makeup artists, hair stylists, and the works bustled all over me in a dizzy tizz leaving me bored to bits. I was used to all this primping, getting jostled around. When these fashion designers come in they already have set ideas on what they want. Grant it nopony wants to get bossed around but the best kind of model according to the books was someone who basically doesn't care.

"What happened to your Coiffure," Peridot gasped.

"Uh . . . I . . . I'm a wash and go pony," I stated while my currently yellow coat color was resprayed with a hint of goldenrod to cover up the original color of my coat. My gray scale mane and tail, originally bobbed on purpose, had streaks of black added to it. A set of hair extensions. "What I don't wear long hair?"

That didn't stop Dahlia Belle from yanking my fetlocks and teasing them with a rat comb. She slammed down the pith helmet on my head. I blinked at the dry sensation of violet contacts. hiking shirt and a messy main and tail. I'm an Earth Pony who doesn't have a green thumb. What could possibly make me want to play the role of a book character?

"Curtain Call is in two minutes," Toot Suite hissed, "What could be taking you girls so long?"

Ahh-oh-whoops. Wiggling on six limbs. I was trying to deviate between the Mechanical wings and moving my hooves. I took one step the other direction. The "Wings" wiggled south. Peridot and Dahlia struggling to keep me balanced. Toot Suite slapped a hoof to her muzzle. Rolling her eyes, she pushed the button on the remote. I could finally walk but the dang props were now dragging the floor.

"Okay, look you see this computer chip?" Toot Suite explained, to which I nodded, I swear, marbles rattled betwixt my ears, "And it goes where?"

"Behind my ear," I exclaimed. placing the chip there, knocking my ear a few times and ZING! Ouch that electrical burst of static electricity hurt. Those wings popped open.

"I warned you that my props are directly connected to your central nervous system," Toot Suite warned, "That's why you keep getting a wing boner every time you flick that ear."

I flicked it and those wings just popped open.

"Fancy Fizz stop that!" Toot Suite warned, "My props are special and only look like real wings. Don't play with the computer chip!"

"Awww but look Tootsie they're so cute," I cooed, "Watch this. Wheeee!"

I giggled at making the little tips repeatedly flap.

A few practice flexes and those things felt quite intriguing. So this was what a pegasus wings felt like. Sure they were props but I looked in the mirror and it was Daring Do staring back. It just didn't feel right. I didn't match my image. I scowled, flexing my lips into a smirk. Daring Do is smart and cunning. I practiced a couple lines.

"You won't get away with this Ahuizotl," My persona growled from my lips, my voice harshened to match the adventurer, Daring Do perked up in the mirror, my persona and I mimicking another line "Now Ahuizotl, you know I love you, but I can't give you the ring 'til I've properly proposed."

"Beautiful," Photo Shoot gushed, "Now for a moment I thought I was seeing the real Daring Do."

"Don't bat your eyes though Fancy, with that line behind that look it makes Daring Do look like she honestly wants to french kiss that baboon," Toot Suite added, "And A.K. Yearling is going to be at the grand viewing. You want her to get disgusted with her own character?"

"Ew! No!" I groused, "Yuck! Those two kissing, bad mental image. Toot Suite, Bad image. I'm trying to keep my focus and I can't keep my act up with distracting no that's just wrong."

"Then consider this focus training Fancy Fizz. Curtain Call is now!" Toot Suite stated, and with a final shove pushed me out the door. "Go! Now! Don't break a leg."

"Good luck to you too," I genuinely told Toot Suite.

The dusty blue Pegasus waved at me replying, "I really mean that last part, Don't break a leg."

Now mind you Toot Suite can be a little literal but she's the only friend who hadn't changed drastically during our days in Filly Finishing school. A thousand years ago a great calamity known as Nightmare Moon had, I didn't pay attention in school it was politics, I hated politics. A princess saved the day, the rest is history. So was the confidence everypony had in everypony else I'm afraid. Merchants such as Flim Flam industries or Barnyard Bargains had started to see stars as well as dollar signs. We had the resources and the technology, steam power, coal, and solar energy. We already had trains, ovens, hot air balloons and cider breweries. Who wouldn't market products that controlled weather, grew crops, and handled things that only magic could.

Suffice to say it also caused a gigantic rift between pony's trust in the Princess and the same jealousy the Princess once felt towards her own had been reflected among us. It was ancient history. I don't know who nightmare moon was but as the descendants of the ponies from back then. I could see it clearly. A few of the set Designers I passed by argued the same thing.

"No pony can handle weather better than us! We need to do the real work around here not some machines. Right Ms. Actress?" The Pegasus pony argued. his green hoof nearly slapping my back, more importantly Toot Suite's wings. The harness hidden by the hiking shirt. As an Earth pony I couldn't honestly agree with him as a fellow pegasus to fellow pegasus.

Besides, the machines and powers of Science was what gave many of the fellow ponies I knew their bread and butter. How could Equestria exist without its zeppelins and steam trains? What would the country I learned about, my entire life be like without the smell of smelters in the air. Stacks of smoke lazing out of the factory smokestacks. Pegasus are jealous of weather baloons and zeppelins. Earth Ponies are generation by generation forgetting how farms work because the skies are literally the limit. Unicorns are just glorified recluses nowadays. I can count on my fetlocks how many Unicorns are actually not technicians or administrators and that's the Headmaster for Philamena's Filly Finishing School.

My safe haven was not the cold cruel world around me. Cameras rolling I plunged into the made up jungle remembering that in my role this Jungle would be a real jungle. Daring Do could hold her own against hordes of savages sure. The only clue ruining the image. I was careful not to let the water touch me. Mindful of my new prop wings. I didn't have years of practice but with a little composure and a convincing front even a Nopony Special like me could look like an expert.

"Daring Do doesn't need help she can do things herself," spoke the figment of the silver screen.

On cue, I adjusted the pith helmet. She didn't have alot of lines. Her or I should say my glances at my rainbow maned acting partner playing every part the plucky young sidekick seemed to be almost genuine. Parts of the play were skewed a bit. Camera angled to show me outstretching my "wings" to fly off a cliff.

"Cut!" yelled Photo Shoot.

Next Scene I was attached to a wire, "wings" outstretched as I glided in for a trained landing. The invisible zipline broke. I front flipped and rolled. Stunt doubles are trained to roll with blows and punches. That's why it made doing those dangerous stunts Daring Do pulled that much easier. The film cut to another scene of entering the temple. Chained to a wall, my eyes filled with fright. Paranhua water filling up fast towards me. Traps on all sides.

The fake bricks are actually easy to remove. They're supposed to be easy. I swallowed a scream. The things were actually heavy. Where was Rainbow Dash? This was her big scene!

"help," I muttered under my breath. The last brick crumbled. I dangled limply when something went smash.

I closed my eyes in horror. Falling to my doom wasn't in the script. Wind gust at my back. Piranhas nipping at my hooves. I yelped when the last brick popped out too quickly. Watering gurgling closer. Hooves too heavy in chains. The rushing wind stopped to hover.

I barely opened one frightened eye. Blue hooves cluctched either foreleg. Rainbow flapping her wings quite hard. Her next line bit around a small clue.

"You can flap too y'know." the actor scoffed.

. . . Oh yeah . . . The Prop wings can still flap . . . not fly.

"CUT!" yelled Photo Shoot, "Fancy Fizz good job on ze panicking but flap zhose wings FASTer. We need to have the feeling of you trying to come up and fly."

"But honestly Boss," Dahlia Belle snorted, "Why didn't you get a real Pegasus to play as a Pegasus?"

I glared in Dahlia's direction. In all seriousness they said they wanted a good actor who could let Photo Shoot have free reign of the movie and if anyone actually did think that last line over than Toot Suite would've been out of a job. Pegasi were normally apart of Airship crews. They didn't work the weather anymore. I could do the lines and this was the only movie part I ever clawed my way to the top for and even spoke rudely to get it. Not to rain on Dahlia's parade but an actor's dedication is as paramount to their role as a zebra to their stripes Thank you very much. I didn't have time to politely reprimand her however.

"That wasn't acting I was actually scared," I stated, "Something is wrong. The piranhas are real live fish and who fixed the bricks? I don't want anypony getting hurt"

"mmm, the movie budget would end up going to the hospital if this keeps up." Photo Shoot commented, "We're shooting a movie not a snuff film."

"What movie?" interrupted Rainbow who pushed her head into the fray, "Get back Daring Do these could be imposters or assasins or imposters dressed up as impersonators only to be secretly involved in an evil assassin association."

A mouthful of words punctuated the awkward silence. The set designers, Dahlia Bell, Peridot, Toot Suite, Photo Shoot and I all exchanged glances. Rainbow's breath hurtled in and out of her lungs. We fell to the floor laughing. I guffawed so hard my ribs hurt. I had to roll onto my stomach to avoid hurting Toot Suite's beautifully crafted fake wings or smudging my costume makeup.

"Even her improvisation is so in character," Photo Shoot squealed lightly, patting Rainbow on the head, "So cute! But we can't continue the movie until this mess is sorted out." She sighed, "Wunderbar time working with you Fancy Fizz."

She said like this would be our final time working together. It scared me. I couldn't just walk away from a movie. Not getting it halfway done. Yet Photo Shoot was a pony of many talents and few cares. She checked Dahlia's pocket watch because unless you can twirl the thing on your nose it's easier to ask for the time instead of just nipping the watch out herself.

"I have a modeling shoot in half an hour. Fancy Fizz, Toot Suite, put away zhose wings." Photo shoot commanded, "When this mess is sorted out Daring Do shall fly again!"

The speech though baffling our rainbow maned compatriot had struck a chord of hope for my friend Toot Suite and I. Sadly it was also our first team up in years. Toot Suite had been drifting from Zeppelin to Zeppelin flourishing in Mechanics and gadgetry. I had my whole life simply fall into my lap much like the majority of my class in Filly Finishing school. The only problem involved looking into a mirror.

"Daring Do works alone," I tried to growl but the focus I had on my Persona wore off. The only thing staring back at me was the little pony whose onlooker did not quite match the image I had set up for me. I was not as dashing as Daring Do. Just a simple spritz of water washed away the Cutie mark painted upon my flank to reveal it to be blank and baron of anything. I licked the tip of my hoof and the static electrical zipper attached right there making it easy for a pony unzip and slip out. Peridot and Delilah were scrupulous in harvesting the hair extensions attached to my mane and tail. They weren't mine and honestly was quite glad they could keep them. The contacts I carefully took out revealing plain monochrome eyes. Water washed away all the glitz, all the color off my body revealing a pony who looked like she stepped directly off a black and white film.

A pony whose mane and tale was pitch black and bobbed short. A grayscale almost white coat without a single cutie mark. The makeup dripping in rivulets onto the floor. Toot Suite entered when everyone else left. Normally, nopony really cares about modesty among fellow girls since horses don't exactly wear clothes anyway but after the first time Toot Suite had seen all the fuss I endure for a single scene. She was more cautious to approach after everyone left to avoid getting trampled. Wings outstretched, the bronze metal glittered underneath the feathers. The harness was beginning to make me itch but I couldn't help but marvel at Toot Suite's fabulous art. It was the perfect mix of our Equestrian Ideals and our Victorian Science. Beautiful, Graceful, and truly old in that well cared for way.

Admiring the kind of craftsman Toot Suite had become gave me pause to see the sadness reflected in her gunmetal gaze. Watching me stand half in half out of my costume.

"You are a genius as ever," I told her gently.

"The only difference between Genius and stupidity is Genius has limitations," Toot Suite answered, "All these years and still no cutie mark?"

"Nope?" I stated, "Is that really a bad thing?"

"It's just a sad thing," Toot Suite exclaimed, "You used to be so charming and now. You scoff just like they did."

"They" being the operative turn. All the high society snotty ponies at the Filly Finishing School. An actress can take on any role and play out nearly any dream if paid well enough and any dream can be pretend. Learning the proper way to walk, talk, sit, eat and stand was like a script and I had fun pretending to be something I'm not. Actually I had fun pretending to be many things I'm not. The only time anyone ever saw me with my guard down was when I crashed into Toot Suite. I stared longingly at the vacation photo of a family who huddled together in front of a real fossil. It's back arched backwards and the fine sheen of feathers stamped along the rock showed this strange bird had once had wings. It was primitive yet dead beat gorgeous.

"Toot Suite, the bird in your family's photo was an Archaeopteryx?" I asked slowly, "World's first two winged connection to dinosaurs and birds?"

"Yes!" she stated cheerfully, "And the time you stood up for me at that croquet game."

"You put hot sauce on Prince Blueblood's Croquet mallet. All I did was pass it to him," I pretended to scoff but it quickly divulged into laughter. Toot Suite was having a hard time laughing with her mouth around a belt strap, "I'm sorry for not being myself lately. When you joined the royal Air-Navy. I didn't have my cutie mark yet and decided to keep playing different roles, trying new things until I could see what fit."

"I didn't think you'd make a career out of it though," Toot Suite answered.

"Neither did I," I agreed, "By the way have you seen Rainbow Fruit lately?"

"Let me guess, Pegasus ham? Got all the leading lady rolls until you came on to the scene?" Toot Suite sighed, "No I haven't seen that batty nut anywhere."

"The correct term is androgynous," I corrected with a grimace, she tugged too tight, "And just because he makes it a hobby out of wearing girl's CLOTHES. Eek, does not mean it has anything to do with the strange water filled with real piranhas inciDENT unless he wasn't here and we had the real Rainbow Dash come crashing in here any minute."

Close but no cigar the pony Rainbow Fruit bashed through the door. He barged past us whirling around in the air. The brunette pegasus sat down and asked.

"Have you seen my wig?"

I could barely slap a hoof to my face. The door opens again revealing the erractic rainbow maned pony from before. I braced my hooves on the mirror angling myself to see the pony standing behind me. My prop wings halfway unfurled. Toot Suite looked between Rainbow Stranger and our well known colleague Rainbow Fruit. This Rainbow Fruit look-a-like's eyes widened. Pupils shrunk in shock. Corners of her downturned lips nearly falling off her muzzle. Her face just screamed the heartache of a little filly whose dream was crushed. I-I've seen it on many a rabid fanpony.

"Oh no please don't cry," I begged.

Here I stood, halfway in, halfway out of my costume. The yellow makeup was not washed off from the flank down. The Cutie Mark bleeding off of my hip. I reached out to the pegasus pony. Her heart wrenching scream of Nooo caterwauled off the iron girders. Toot Suite cussed under her breath. The Irradiated waste disposal unit was in that direction.

"Wait! Come Back!" I cried. Not that I could fly if I dropped like a stone by doing so. Still ground ridden as I am. Toot Suite muscled into my way. "But she was standing there breathing in radioactive waste Tootsie, we need to go help her!"

"And break those wings of mine into your spine during the process?" Toot Suite asked, "No, that's just some random stranger. Fancy I need to get you out of that harness before you hurt yourself."

"Don't worry Fancy Fizz, Rainbow Dash there couldn't have breathed in that much radiation." Rainbow Fruit reassured me.

"But still she was acting weird, well, weird even for you." I gasped, "We need to help her."

The crash vibrated the room. Crack of bone meeting metal. The Rainbow Maned pony did not get very far. I whimpered in sympathy. Even though I didn't know where she came from. I know a broken heart when I hear one. It's the one thing I hated about being a blank flank in the acting business. There was just that sad truth where the dream is only that, a hope and dream, fragile enough to be crushed.

Gears clicked, belts slid away. Toot Suite put the wings in her saddle bag. Utility belt around her neck. Rainbow Fruit opened the door. Violet eyes showing concern.

"Both of you two just go." Rainbow Fruit said, "I'll talk to Photo Shoot."

My drooping ears perked right up. Attacking the pony in a vicious hug. I cheered, "Oh thank you! Thank you! Thank you! I could kiss you!"

"KISS?!." Rainbow Fruit panicked. Fear of women I'm afraid.

"Quite right, well away we go," I cheered, galloping after the rainbow maned pony.

Toot Suite flying after me yelling, "What did I tell you about breaking legs?"

My clopping hooves echoed after. Rainbow Dash laid unconcious, bleeding but physically fine. It was the radiation damage Toot Suite and I were worried about. It was rarely serious but it did tend to make ponies nauseous, hallucinatory and dizzy. Crazy as she is, she also saved me even if I crushed her fantasy. I didn't know that the start of helping one crazy pony was just the beginning of my first real un-pretended adventure.