Seven

Seven

A My Little Pony Tale

By: Damien Darkside

..:: Chapter Three: Paresse / Sloth ::..

“Are you nervous?” Sugar Petal asked the black-winged angel beside him.

“I'm a massive winged creature unlike the world has ever seen. I can cast magic and summon beings from another plane of existence who do what I say, when I say. I have my own armies and servants that would do whatever I pleased and the portal that could bring them here is literally within the castle walls.” Lucifer looked at her with a stern face, “what do you think?”

She giggled and bumped her flank against his leg as they walked through the halls. “That nervous eh?”

“I always like to be seen as best as I can be to those that matter. If this is to go through, I have to be friends with six ponies that are most likely going to fear me over trying to give me a chance.” Lucifer adjusted his cufflinks as he spoke, they were silver pentagrams.

“Oh they might not be that judgemental. Maybe if you do with them as you did with me they would be putty in your hands.” Sugar teased.

“Considering how we haven't even fucked, I'm kind of glad I got you so friendly with me.” Lucifer ruffled her mane lightly as they continued to the Royal Court.

Sugar grabbed the door handles to the great hall. “Complaining that I don't put out on the first date?”

“Actually it's quite refreshing.” Lucifer said as he walked through. “I think I might actually miss your company.”

“You know where I'll be. See you in Hell Lucifer.” Sugar winked at him as she started to walk away.

“I'll be saving a seat for you.” Lucifer said as he waved good-bye.

The next hour was spent with Celestia in front of her court. Over a hundred ponies were present as Celestia gave them the cover story that she arranged with Lucifer. Lucifer bowed and answered a lot of questions that ponies were asking. He of course was a master of charm and wit and had ponies at ease as he told them exactly what they wanted to hear.

Lucifer focused on making sure ponies understood three things: he was peaceful, he sided with the Princesses and he wasn't going to eat anypony. Of course it was more complex than that but it was surprisingly easy to put them at ease. Of course when it has been a millennium of peace it was quite simple to keep them calm. Lucifer was slightly disappointed, he was expecting some hostility or distrust.

He figured he just wasn't in the right place, or haven't met the right being that could give him the chaos he was used to with humanity.

Nevertheless he was in Celestia's bedroom afterwards, clarifying some last-minute details with him before he left. The summoning marks were completely gone from her room as well. Considering how his arrival probably burned a few things, nobody would have been able to tell with her excellent cleaning job. Lucifer chalked it up to magic and expected to do that a lot in his time here.

With a flick of his wrist and a bow to Celestia, he took off towards Ponyville.

///---///

Inside of Ponyville, there was a library. This library wasn't a normal one either, it was a tree. Inside this tree there lived a purple mare by the name of Twilight Sparkle. Now Twilight Sparkle was the proud student of one Princess Celestia, ruler of Equestria. When Princess Celestia requests Twilight to do something for her, Twilight had a knack for getting completely stressed out to make sure it was done perfectly.

Besides, she was also a princess. It was to be expected to perform her duties as diligently and perfectly as possible. Not that she was specifically the princess of anything to be honest, but she still had the title.

Although right now Princess Twilight was so stressed out that even if she got laid, drank three shots of whiskey, smoked an entire bowl of weed and was treated to the deluxe-ultra-service from the Ponyville Spa; she would still be on edge.

“Twilight, you've been up since you got the letter from the Princesses. Are you really, really, really sure you don't need a break?” A certain purple dragon was dodging his 'sister' as she was running from book-to-book.

“SpikethatiscompletelyrediculoussincetheaverageponydoesnnotactuallyneedmorethaneighthoursofsleepeveryfortyeighthoursIamcompletelyfinewhywouldyouthinkthat?”

All that Spike got out of that was his name.

“Well I was thinking that you have been going at your research a little bit heavy over the past month.” Spike was trying his best to pick up books that were being sent across the room, “I just don't want you to hurt yourself. I don't think it is healthy for a pony to be running on coffee for two days straight, crashing for six hours then going again at it.”

“Why I think you are being quite silly Spike, it is not a problem for me! I simply am looking for anything that could help me do better research on another creature.” Twilight actually stopped moving for a solid thirty seconds as she tried to explain her excitement. Even her wings stopped flapping all over the place. “This is the first contact with another being that isn't of this world! I am going to be the one to document it!”

Spike was saved from her barrage of speech by a knock on the door. “Ohmigoshthatmightbehim!” Twilight raced to the door and opened it up to see Applejack and Pinkie Pie.

“Oh, it's only you two,” she said very unenthusiastically.

“Well good day to you too sugarcube. Glad ta see we are so wanted 'n' all.” Applejack nodded as she walked into the library. “I can't stay for long, I still got work to do at the ranch.

“Hiyas Twilight! You doing okay? You look like me after I stay up for a few days straight partying!” Pinkie Pie nodded like Applejack but bounced into the library.

“I'm fine Pinkie, just been going on a few weeks researching into spells and theories on audio communications. I'm trying to figure out how to get voices sent from one place to another. Imagine if you could send your voice to anypony you want through a device without being a unicorn!” Twilight spoke fast as she used her magic to move some parchment off a table and to put books back on shelves.

“That is mighty fine partner, but surely you must have been doing something else?” Applejack said as she helped move a few books from a small pile out of the way.

“Nope! I needed all my focus on this one project! It could...” Twilight slowed down her speech and started to snore.

“Alright, that ain't normal. Then again Twilight ain't normal so I guess this might just be normal for her.” Applejack spoke to nopony in particular as she went to wake up Twilight.

She poked Twilight with her hoof and the purple pony shouted out “the square of the hypotenuse which is the side opposite the right angle is equal to the sum of the squares of the other two sides!”

Applejack just backed off a little in concern. “Now that is mighty interestin' there Twi, but you really should get some-”

“I'm here! I am just wondering why you had to wake us up so early! It's Saturday!” Rarity spoke as she walked through the open door with a nice light-brown sun hat.  “Spikey could you please be a gentledrake and take my hat for me? I can also count on you coming to the boutique correct? I do have a small order that I can use your help on!”

The young dragon was only too happy to oblige and placed her hat in the closet near the front door. “Now Fluttershy, you can come in here with me. Whatever it is isn't happening yet.” Rarity spoke to the timid Pegasus almost like a human does to a cat.

“Oh... well okay then. I-I just want to be ready for anything.” Fluttershy kept a bit close to the walls, presumably to brace for anything that Twilight could unleash.

The girls made small chat as they waited for Rainbow Dash to arrive. Spike served some drinks as Rarity complained about not having anything to inspire her lately. Twilight almost fell asleep a few more times and was kept awake by Spike as she explained how she was going to bring a new form of communications to Ponyville. Applejack was about to discuss something about her farm before they heard a knocking on the door.

“Now that better be Rainbow Dash because I swear if it is what I think it is...” Twilight stumbled to the door as she tried to appear happy to the guest.

“Of course it is me! You wouldn't guess who I met today while flying!” a muffled voice sounded through the door.

Twilight opened the door to see the multicoloured Pegasus, “well I bet it was probably Derpy again.”

“Nope! Say hello to Lucifer!” Rainbow Dash moved to the side and stuck out her wing and hoof to introduce the black-winged bipedal beast to the newest princess.

Twilight's sleepiness was blown away in an instant and she immediately was fascinated by the being in front of her. Given the similar shape and nature of Minotaurs she checked similar features to determine gender. From the jawline to its broad chest and strong arms she gathered that the beast in front of her was indeed male. The black mane on his head and face were well-kept as well as his clothing were styled. That indicated everything from culture to advances in technology; where appearances would be matching if not higher in priority than survival. He was covered in styled fabric which meant that he was fur-less and needed clothing in order to maintain body temperatures. Even though she recently got her pair of wings, she could easily tell that his were maintained at this utmost highest level.

His eyes were a lighter hazel colour, and she couldn't stop staring at him.

He moved down onto his left knee and bowed to her. “Pleased to meet you Princess Twilight. My name is Lucifer, I have been sent by the Princesses to live in Ponyville for the foreseeable future.”

“HellomynameisTwilightSparkleandyouarewelcomeinPonyvilleandIwanttosaythatIamhonouredthatyouwould-” she was cut off by Rainbow almost shoving her hoof down her throat.

“Twilight, take a deep breath then start again.” Dash said as she removed her hoof and used it to close her friend's open awe-struck mouth. “Sorry Lucifer, I told you she might act like this with you being new and all.”

Lucifer laughed and ruffled Rainbow Dash's hair, which she had mixed emotional reactions to. “Considering how you tried to drag me to the ground and beat me up as I flew close to Ponyville, this is the best welcome I've received so far.”

Rainbow rubbed the back of her colourful mane in embarrassment. “I thought you might have been a threat and all. We are all cool now though right?”

“As long as you show me those moves you were talking about. Now Twilight, want to try again?” Lucifer held out his hand. “My name is Lucifer.”

Twilight knew that Griffons and Minotaurs shook their hands and talons, so she placed her hoof in his palm and tried to do her best. “Welcome to Ponyville. My name is Twilight Sparkle, resident librarian and princess.”

“Who is it Twilight?” Rarity spoke up from inside the library.

Twilight lead Lucifer into the library with Rainbow Dash. As the two ponies walked through the doorway, Lucifer had to duck his head under the frame a little as to not crack his head on it. He was greeted to the sight of a few more colourful ponies sitting down around a table. He assumed that these were Twilight's friends and his 'projects'. They were all adorable.

“Greetings ladies, my name is Lucifer. I am pleased to meet you all.” He said with a bow.

“Oh my! How are you dear sir! I must say that whoever has done your clothes is quite skilled! The stitching is flawless and the fabric is divine.” Rarity walked up to him and did a pony variant on a curtsey.

Lucifer chuckled slightly at her description of him. “You must be Rarity, Celestia spoke of you. You run a fashion boutique in Ponyville correct?”

“Why yes I do! Though it caters more towards the mares of Ponyville I am certain I can free up my schedule to fit you in nicely if you would like to see my wares. I must simply check the stitching on your jacket! It looks like it was made with a lot of skill!”

“Oh I am certain I'll be seeing you for your services dear.” Lucifer turned to Applejack, “and you must be the head mare at Sweet Apple Acres!”

“That's correct there Luci. Name's Applejack, pleased ta meet'cha.” Applejack tipped her hat in his direction.

Noting the lack of chairs, Lucifer looked for a place to sit down. “Funny, one of my favourite drinks where I am from is called an Applejack.” Lucifer decided to sit down on his rear beside Rainbow and Twilight.

“I'm Pinkie Pie! I am a baker and party pony perfectionist!” Pinkie waved her head back and fourth like a pendulum.

“Oh one of my cities almost parties all the time!” Lucifer laughed at the pink pony's enthusiasm, his deeper voice scaring Fluttershy.

Fluttershy tapped into all of her courage reserves in order to put on her best face and to greet the newcomer as best as she could. Her heart raced as she felt the legendary power of the pegasi course through her veins to give her the voice to send a greeting that would be remembered for all time.

“Ummm... hi. I'm Flut-t-t-tershy.”

“Hello Fluttershy, nice to meet you.” Lucifer smiled at her to try and put her at ease, however she saw his canine teeth and it didn't ease her fears at all.

“Not much of a talker is she?” The dark angel asked the cowgirl.

Applejack rolled her eyes, “that she ain't.”

Lucifer looked down on some of the pieces of paper that were still left on the table. He was making some progress on what it could possibly be as drinks were served. He figured it out before everyone had their beverage.

“Missing wavelengths,” Lucifer simply said as he tapped the page. “You need a proper transmitter too.”

“What?” Twilight said as she shook her head to wake up yet again. She seemed to ignore what he said. “So Lucifer, how did you arrive in Equestria?”

Lucifer told most of the truth. Simply that he was the result of a spell that 'had a different outcome than what was expected'. The Princesses attempted a summoning spell for a new servant and instead got Lucifer. It was quite similar to what really did happen, just with a little less truth in it. As far as Lucifer was concerned, that was pretty much all you needed most of the time.

That questions was followed by what you would expect when a new species came into their world. Lucifer was subjected to a mass questioning from the ponies that he was tasked to be friends with. He answered every question with as much truth as he wanted to give. He told them all about Hell, but kept out the fact he was the actual being in charge and pretty much skipped anything to do with God. In his mind they didn't need to hear such trifles, God was only concerned with humans anyways.

As he spoke, he actually remembered that he had a chess game with Jesus soon. As much as he hated to do so he would need to re-schedule his chess game. Jessica would have to take care of that.

“So lemme get this straight. You are telling me that your world is actually an afterlife of sorts of another world completely?” Applejack clarified.

Lucifer munched on an apple, one of which he assumed as from the cow-pony’s farm. “Yes indeed. Humans live their lives and then their souls end up in Hell or a place called Heaven. The leader of Heaven is super strict and is thinks too highly of himself, whereas Hell is a place for everyone to be themselves.”

“So what does one do in Hell exactly?” Rarity asked next.

“Well it is really up to you. We have endless fields for those who prefer the country. We have cities that extend to the horizon and up to the sky. Great banquets for warriors, libraries for the bookworms, and halls for the ones who indulge in feasts and parties. We also have an infinite pool of the Dream-cape where souls make their own worlds. Finally all souls have the ability to see what's going on the planet Earth where they are from; this way they can learn new things and adapt that to their lives in Hell.”

Pinkie Pie almost jumped on the table with a look of chock upon her face. “You guys have parties?”

Lucifer checked his memory to make sure he did tell her that they had parties. Hell, he couldn't get El Dorado to shut up sometimes. “Well yes, last major one was for humanity reaching a certain point of their history. They called it 2000 AD, party lasted and entire week.” That seemed to blow her pink mind.

“Do... do you eat meat?” Fluttershy squeaked out.

Lucifer smiled as he thought it over for a couple of seconds looking at the papers again. Of course the one who was the most shy and timid would ask him if he ate animals. “I do, though as an Angel of the Dead I don't really need to eat a lot. I'm omnivorous by nature and by choice, I wouldn't be happy without it.” He paused for a few seconds and looked into his cup in thought. “I also won't eat you though. Celestia would send me to the moon. Hmm... yeah, the math is off.”

This got a nervous laugh from Fluttershy and an odd look from Twilight. “Nevertheless, I am probably either going to go vegan or get some meat off of Griffon traders.”

“What exactly is an angel in your world?” Twilight was already writing down things on a piece of paper with a quill.

Lucifer briefly considered giving her a pen from his pocket. Twilight was hearing what he was saying but not really listening. Looking at her face he could see the exhaustion just simmering below her features. He decided to let her wallow in her pen-less ways. “An angel is a winged humanoid with access to magic and increased strength. There are four major angels, three of which are in Heaven and the other one is in Hell. They had a falling out from what I understand. Nasty business.”

“Well, ain't that something. I don't mean to be rude and your world sounds mighty interestin', but I gotta get back to the farm. Apples don't buck themselves.” Applejack tossed her hat on and walked out the door after nodding to Lucifer.

The Dark Angel nodded back and stood up as she left out of courtesy and some respect. She was one of the Elements of Harmony after all. If some acts of class didn't faze Applejack, it would probably be good for Rarity's view on him. This pretty much also gave an excuse for the other ponies to leave as well.

Fluttershy meekly said her goodbyes before taking off. Rainbow Dash bumped her hoof against Lucifer's fist before excusing herself. Pinkie Pie gave Lucifer a cupcake with a deep purple frosting before jumping behind a tree without appearing on the other side. Rarity bowed and Lucifer returned the gesture as she left, inviting him for tea sometime. Spike followed her as well and Lucifer swore he could see cartoon hearts float behind the purple dragon.

Then there were two. “Lucifer would you mind sitting down and letting me collect some samples from you?” Twilight brought out a chair for him to be seated in. It looked like any normal chair made of wood, but Lucifer could clearly see straps on it.

Lucifer raised an eyebrow at the purple mare and subconsciously tucked his wings closer to his spine as he shuffled a little bit back. “Now why would you need something like that? I'm totally a top by the way.”

Her head went on a slight tilt not quite unlike a questioning dog. She looked as if Lucifer just asked an absolutely absurd question and Lucifer swore her mane changed shape slightly. Twilight's hair seemed to get a little bit more... off. “Why how am I supposed to learn more about you without taking a few pieces for my experiments?”

Red sirens started going off in Lucifer's head. Sure he may be all-powerful in his dimension but in here he had a few poorly-practised levitation spells, butler summon and a badly-functioning fire spell. Twilight would probably be able to take any items from his magical grasp so that took out getting a weapon of any sort. She didn't need to know about Jessica yet, and he didn't want to subject his favourite succubus to anything that this pony could want. Lastly, he didn't think it would be in his favour to accidentally burn down this librarian's home.

“All I need is your blood. Maybe a few feathers!” She seemed to be trying to rationalize herself with him.

It was failing, he needed time to think. “Twilight, that isn't the best way to get to know me.”

She smiled, and it was creeping Lucifer the fuck out. “Oh but it will! It will tell me about your diet as well as how magical you are! Then there is the coating of your feathers and you probably got trace pieces of Hell on you. Imagine what I could learn from – please get away from the door.”

Lucifer tried to keep calm. Even though he lived thousands of years, his body could still experience pain. Plus, he had been taking it easy for the past five hundred years and that does nothing positive for your pain tolerance. He really didn't want a few more feathers ripped out and he certainly didn't want any needles in his arms. Sure to Lucifer it seemed like a pussy thing to admit, but he wasn't ashamed too much of it.

“Now why should I stay? Clearly you are in need of some rest, you aren't thinking clearly.”

“Oh but I am! Your presence has set my mind ablaze and I just need to do experiments on yo- I mean with you!”

Even spirits feel pain, even more so in a physical form. It was simply another form of existence. It was time to leave until he could better assess this purple pony. She needed to chill the fuck out, and he thought of a good way to do that.

Before Twilight could do anything to him, he swung the door open and started to run outside. “Wait that came out wrong come BACK!”

///---///

Mayor Mare walked through the streets of her fine town. Sure it has recently been seeing an increase of activity due to the Elements of Harmony, but nopony actually got killed and tourism was up. That only boded well for the economy and she was happy that her town was growing.

“It's a fine day for mayoring if I do say so myself!” the older mare said to nopony in particular.

She walked through the town's marketplace, nodding to ponies as she went by. They were such hard workers and they all tried their best. Heck, if it wasn't for Twilight's almost weekly apocalyptic experiments disturbing her fine townsfolk, she would be even happier. However Twilight was a good mare and was just too curious for her own good in Mayor Mare's opinion.

In fact, Twilight was a bit late on whatever doom-bringing thing she was going to unleash upon all her ponies this month. At this point she was getting a little bit nervous. When you get subjected to absolute-death for so long you kind of don't want the quiet anymore. Peace wasn't too peaceful these days.

The screaming put her mind at ease. She turned around to see a large being with an impressive black wingspan fly across a few buildings, chased by a barely aloft Twilight Sparkle. “Well! Death approaches! Everypony to your homes! Please lock your doors and we will wait for all of this to blow over!”

It took less than a few minutes for the entire town to appear deserted.

///---///

“Let me explain! I don't want to drain all your blood! Just some of it! Did I make it seem like I was going to drain all of it? I didn't mean that!” Twilight yelled after Lucifer as they flew over a lake outside of Ponyville.

“I am not giving you any of my blood!” Lucifer yelled back as he flew across the sky.

It really was a great day for flying and quite frankly Twilight wasn't the most speedy of ponies. Lucifer also didn't hold much of this situation against her either. According to Luna, Twilight was barely sleeping at all over the past few weeks and her dreams were scattered and random. Also Rainbow Dash told him that Twilight was quite stubborn, socially inept, and incredibly awkward.

Rainbow Dash made sure she was incredibly blunt for a reason and he was thankful for that.

It still didn't make Lucifer want to slow down at all. Oh no it did not. After about five minutes of flying, a cyan pony started to fly beside him. “Hey Lucifer, what's up?”

“Hey Rainbow. Twilight went insane and is trying to catch me so she can perform experiments on me.” Lucifer filled her in on what happened.

“Huh, okay. I'll go have a chat with her. Keep flying.”

Lucifer just did that as Dash slowed down her speed to converse with Twilight. Lucifer did peek back to see how that was going. Twilight looked like an absolute mess, and her face had a mix of terror,  concern, and bat-shit insanity. Rainbow spoke a bit and Twilight seemingly was yelling things back. There were a few eye rolls on Dash's part.

Lucifer almost smacked into a tree, so he swerved around it and quickly pulled a u-turn upwards. Twilight wasn't prepared for it and scrambled mid-air before resuming her chase. Dash simply did the same manoeuvre as Lucifer did and caught up easily. “Hey, nice form. Okay want the low-down?”

“Sure, and by the way I could fly faster than this. I am just trying to tire her out.” Lucifer told her as they casually turned towards Ponyville again.

“Good idea.” Rainbow looked back to make sure Twilight was still okay flying. “She wanted to tell you that she is sorry that she wanted to take pieces of your body in somewhat of a forced way and that she won't do that again.”

Oh, that was nice. “Anything else?”

“Well she was a bit of a drama queen over it all. Basically now she thinks you won't be her friend because of this. She is super worried about upsetting Princess Celestia.” The Pegasus laughed, “In fact she is chasing you now to try to get you to slow down.”

“Wait, she is chasing me in order for me to stop flying?”

“She claims she doesn't know what else to do. She's lame like that.” Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes.

“Think she can make it to her house before tiring out too much?” Lucifer asked.

Rainbow looked behind her. “Probably. She's not the best flier to begin with, certainly not as awesome as me! She can probably make it. You got this?” She saw Lucifer nod back to her. “Welp, seeya sometime. When we fly together you make sure that you don't hold back okay?”

“You too Skittles. Seeya in Hell!” Lucifer again smiled at how that had no negativity here.

“You too Lucifer, as long as I don't have to die of course!” Dash literally dashed away from the angel as Lucifer guided the chase towards Twilight's library.

Lucifer was almost there before he saw Twilight start to flail in mid-air as she started to drop. He immediately swooped down to grab her and he cradled the Princess in his arms as he landed on her balcony.

“Lucifassi nnngggg ffffffffftttt,” she said as she started to drift off.

“I know” Lucifer said with a smile as he walked through the door into what he figured was her room. There were books everywhere.

“Massive blarrgin skizzaphrone.”

“Mhm. Yup, totally agree.” Lucifer drew back a cute blue blanket that was covered in cartoon stars.

“Fuzza wuzza fuzzy” was he counter-argument as she barely realized she was in bed.

“Indeed he was,” Lucifer agreed as he tucked her into bed. “Now sleep you crazy purple horse.”

Twilight was out like a light.

///---///

The whole situation was settled with the help of the other Elements of Harmony. Lucifer was introduced to Mayor Mare and the rest of Ponyville and he was treated quite well. After a quick interview by the citizens, they found he was quite a nice fellow. Considering how the Elements and the Princesses were vouching for him the ponies were pretty accepting of him. They almost made him a statue in his honour when he told them that after today's fun he would help Twilight control her experiments and to take her time with them.

Needless to say he was welcome in Ponyville.

When he got back he took Twilight's experimental notes on the concept of transferring a voice over a long distance. Now Lucifer was an angel who lived for quite a long time, so he knew a lot of stuff. He wasn't a professional by any means but he did get the basics of communications. When you get a few million souls coming into Hell in every war humans had you caught onto a few things. He even had a bet running on World War II; Balthazar actually gave him one of the Stradivarius violins that way.

He took out his pen and started to get the few pieces of paper he could find as he started to draw. Applejack came by later on that day to check up on Twilight, who was still sleeping soundly away in her room. She gave Lucifer a few apple fritters and was off again to do whatever she did. After a few more hours of working, Spike came back from Rarity's. Lucifer decided to take a break and helped Spike clean up the disaster the library was in.

During that time he bonded a bit with the purple dragon. Spike was quite intelligent and was quick as a whip. He was able to handle quite a few concepts that Lucifer threw his way and double-checked some of the math Lucifer laid out. When Spike started to prepare dinner, Lucifer told him legends of dragons in the human world.

It was getting quite late in the day when they eventually heard some grumpy moaning and shuffling coming from upstairs.  Twilight was all droopy-eyed as she walked down the stairs and sat down by the table in the centre of the Library. “Hey Spike. Hey Lucifer.” Twilight mumbled as she tried to wake up.

There was a good ten seconds of complete silence, then she realized Lucifer was still there in her home. The next ten minutes were spent with Lucifer listening to Twilight apologize over and over again. Even after repeated assurances that everything was alright, she was sliding bits of “sorry” everywhere.

“Twilight, you aren't a Canadian. Calm down.”

She looked extremely confused. “What's a Canadian?”

“It's a type of human from a country called Canada. They are usually really nice and are lumberjacks.” Lucifer set the small table with few bowls. Tonight they were having creamy potato soup and it smelled delicious.

As they sat down Lucifer had a flash of inspiration. He knew this was a perfect time for a story. Lucifer racked his brains trying to think up of the name of that type of story he was going to tell. Jesus would know, he did this shit all the time. Parables! That's it!

“Twilight and Spike, I'm going to tell you a story. The kind with a moral at the end and everything. It's called a parable.”

Twilight nodded and Spike gave Lucifer his full attention.

There once was a Canadian named Bob. Now Bob was a lumberjack as all good Canadians were if they weren't cowboys, scientists or hockey players. One day Bob decided to cut down one of the tallest redwood trees in the forest. He pulled out his trusty axe and went into the woods to find a mighty tree to fell.

Bob found the one he was looking for and struck it with great ferocity. Wood chips would fly from the trunk of the thick tree as Bob went with his Canadian duty to be a good lumberjack. Swing after swing he would chop into the tree and he smiled as he believed he was making good process.

After about three hours of chopping, Bob's brother Doug the hockey player came by to say hello. “Sorry to interrupt you there Bob but how's it goin' eh?” Doug asked.

“Oh geez ya hose-head,” Bob exclaimed as he was surprised by Doug's arrival. “Sorry to ignore ya. I'm doing alright right, just takin' this here tree down.”

“Well that's a mighty fine tree ya got there now. Your axe there is lookin' a little dull. Might wanna get that sharpened up right?”

Bob scoffed and waved Doug off. “Oh it's no problem. I'm just gonna keep at 'er. I'm making good progress right? I don't wanna lose my speed right?”

“Whatever hoser,” Doug endearingly told him as he left his brother Bob to his work.

As he continued, Bob was getting a little bit sloppy and he was getting tired. However he still thought he was making good progress on the tree and he kept going at it.

Three hours later and Bob was about halfway through the tree. “Oh! Sorry to bother ya eh, but there's a game on in a few and I wanted to know if you wanna come over and watch it?” Doug again scared his brother Bob as he came to see how he was faring.

Bob almost took Doug's head clean off on his messed up swing. Doug rolled away as they both exchanged multiple apologies as it was Canadian custom. “Well ya wanna come? I got smokes and a two-four.”

Now the idea was extremely appealing to Bob. Not only was it the great Canadian pastime of watching a hockey game, but this was the nineties where smoking wasn't completely evil yet. However Bob knew he would crack this tree before the day was out and denied his brother the company.

Bob was out there for four more hours chopping away at the tree before he heard it crack. He looked up to notice too late that he was chopping the tree wrong and it was going the wrong way! He dove out of the way as the tree smashed into the ground a meter away from him. Bob's arms started to hurt as he noticed the dull axe still managed to scrape it as he dived away from death.

Bob cursed his luck as he went home, exhausted, hurt and tired. He came back to see his brother hanging out with a new guy. “Oi, Doug. Who's the new guy?”

“Oh this guy here is George! He's new eh? Just started choppin' down trees today! Complete natural. I think he chopped down one that was as big as yours in three hours!”

Bob was extremely impressed and he opened a beer as he asked the new fellow how he did it so fast and in time to watch the hockey game.

George blushed. “Oh geez it was nothin'. I noticed my axe was gettin' dull and that I was gettin' tired. Every bit I'd just sit down eh and sharpen my axe as I rested a bit. After that it was easy, got in time to see the Habs and the Leafs play.”

“...and after then Bob took his time chopping trees, and him and his brother Doug became famous brothers across Canada for lumber-jacking and hockey.”

“Ohh nice story! They spoke funny but I liked it!” Spike said clapping his hands.

“Oh and the Habs totally won because like I said this was the nineties and the Leafs suck.” Lucifer turned over to Twilight who had a smile as well. “Now Twilight, can you see how this relates to you?”

“Kind of... but my experiments are important! I am close to discovering what I need to finish my theory on non-magical communications!” Twilight started to get into a whiny tone that Lucifer didn't appreciate.

“Yet I've dropped hints here and there that you should have picked up on and you completely ignored them. Granted I didn't try too hard, but I was literally right in front of you.” Lucifer said as he placed his own papers on the table next to Twilight's.

Twilight looked confused as she walked over to the table as Lucifer put two stacks of paper in front of her. Immediately she recognized her own notes and assumed that Lucifer had his beside her. “What's this?” she muttered to nobody in particular.

“These are my notes on wireless communications and your notes on 'non-magical' communications, all organized. Well mine are organized, you will see what I mean. Look.”

Lucifer took a step back from the table and Twilight got a better look. Immediately she could tell where Lucifer was coming from. Even though he was exposed to the technology that she was trying to achieve, he didn't know everything and discovered it for himself in the afternoon. His notes and diagrams were neat, precise and extremely well-done. Twilight's crude sketches were an abomination to her name in her mind.

Then she started going over details. Her notes had circular logic and she revisited the same areas and math multiple times, with different results on the same equation. Then she heard it in her head. “Yeah... the math is off.”

The purple Alicorn scolded herself. He was staring right at the paper and she completely ignored him! Her math was completely off and the three attempts on the fifth, seventh and thirteenth page weren't even correct to begin with. Her wings drooped in disappointment in herself as she continued on her way though the two stacks.

She examined the sketches of devices and prototypes next. Lucifer had multiple designs where her barely-legible sketches were built upon each other. He was reviewing them as soon as he got here! Princess Celestia must have spoken to him about her student's intelligence. She completely glossed over the second most important part of her project in her fatigue. “You need a proper transmitter.”

She was hoping through the diagrams that she wouldn't be beaten on her ideas to send it magically. She was proud of them, they actually were going to work as well with her designed receiver.  She was just having difficulty trying to figure out how to keep the spells from interfering with each other.

Then she saw it plain as day on Lucifer's example. Wavelengths of energy and vibrations. She finally just gave up on trying to defend herself. Missing wavelengths. “I am a pathetic excuse for a Princess when I can't even get my own math correct.”

Lucifer sat down beside her and started rubbing her back with a hand. She sighed a little bit in both disappointment and relaxation. His hand did feel really nice on her stressed muscles, she considered training Spike in massages but was always deterred by his claws. She was starting to reconsider that thought.

“Twilight, it isn't all bad. You had some bases here but you couldn't clarify them. Check these again with a fresh mind. What would have happened if you got the math correct?”

She sighed and looked at the page for a few minutes trying to see what Lucifer was seeing. Her pages were a complete disaster! How could she get anything out of this? She whined a bit in her head as she checked her diagrams. If only she got the math right...

Wait.

Lucifer smiled as she had a complete turn-around in mood. He described what Twilight was going through as a 'click'; some people have called it a 'eureka moment'. She noticed that if her math was correct, she would have adjusted her diagrams. Her graphs would have closely related sine-wavelengths that were extremely similar to sound-waves. The from there she would have a few designs for transmitting and receiving wavelengths and with adjustments in some areas there were almost limitless ways to transmit without overlap interference.

“I get it Lucifer. I really do.” Twilight seemed content and happy that she learned something new as well as finishing her theories with Lucifer's help. “Spike, prepare a friendship report to the Princess.”

///---///

“...and that is when I learned that you have to take time to 'sharpen your axe' to chip away at a problem. When you are getting tired you need to take time to rest and reflect. Doing this can show your mistakes you can make as well including and not limited to chasing somepony/one that can fly better than you effortlessly.

“I'm going to work harder to make sure I have an appropriate sleep schedule as well as break periods.

“Your faithful student, Twilight Sparkle”

Princess Celestia placed the new friendship report on her desk and laughed as she took a sip of her tea. Lucifer was doing an incredible job so far. She was reciting it again out loud for her guest, a certain ruler of Hell. Lucifer was invited to come to Canterlot for the evening once Celestia had read the friendship report. It was only a half-hour flight for him anyways.

“Oh there seems to be a post-script!” Celestia looked at the page with a confused look and turned her head to her guest, “Lucifer, what is a pen exactly?”

Lucifer chuckled as he drank some tea and simply said “what?”

“Her note says 'P.S. Pens are the best thing ever'.”

The next ten minutes were spent with the angel showing the Alicorn what a pen was. There was a knock on the door and Celestia went to go see who it was. A royal guard came into the room with an actual human. This one was tall and wearing simple white robes as well as flip-flops. He had a smile on his face, almost obscured by his beard and his long brown hair. “This being requested access through the portal to Hell. He passed all security checks and was found to be handling nothing dangerous. He was also vouched for by Jessica and Francis as one of Lucifer's friends.”

The being smiled at the dark angel as he held out his hand. “Good to see you Lucifer.”

Lucifer calmly walked over to the man and shook his hand.

“Nice to see you too Jesus.”