Operation Schwulpferdenärrischland
Schwulpferdenärrischland
Load Full StoryFaint ripples disturbed Hitler's Pepsi before hastily returning back to a state of peace. Only to be disrupted again. Berlin wasn't a very nice place to visit this time of year, what with the overcast weather and Russian artillery reducing the once great capital of the Reich to dust. He lifted his head from his desk and let his eyes wonder the room. It was a fairly dank office space with a limited amount of storage space for files and whatnot. But the room had some sort of hapless, suicidal charm to it. With grey walls, wooden furniture and depictions of what the world should look like. It was Adolf's last retreat in case of emergency. His advisers had advised him to retreat the city but Hitler knew this was only delaying the inevitable.
He ran his hand through his hair to the back of his head. He was in deep thought, contemplating what the appropriate action was for such an emergency. He searched through his pockets looking for a particular item his face brightened slightly when he found it. He pulled the item out into full view. It was his iPod Nano, he cherished this a lot. He set it on shuffle and smiled with glee, it landed on his most favourite song ever! "Photograph" by Nickelback. The song just related to the current events so perfectly it was as if it was written just for him. He opened a drawer reveling a picture. Adolf picked up the picture and examined it. It was an image of Hitler as a child playing in the bath with his cousins Winston Hitler and Joesph Hitler, they all looked so happy together. There was a huge break up and both of them left and changed their names. He held it close to his chest, now they where all at each others throats. He sighed sadly remembering the good times. A single tear glided down Adolf's face.
His second favourite song ever started to play. His eyes where now crimson and tears where falling freely down his face he thought about all of the times past, it was to much. He felt a hand patting his back he looked up with tear filled eyes to see his right hand man and second in command Officer Nicolas Cage.
"It's okay babe" Nic whispered into Adolf's ear before nibbling on it. Hitler gave a content sigh.
"You always know how to make everything better Nicky" Adolf smiled at Cage. Nicolas placed his finger on Hitler's lips and started kissing down his neck and began undoing his uniform, he gave a pleasurable moan, he cleared his desk and spread himself across it.
"Take me here now Cage" Hitler moaned
"Gladly" Nic began to strip.
Princess Twilight shivered.
"What's wrong sugarcube?" Applejack asked with genuine worry.
"It's nothing I'm just feeling a little under that's all, nothing a little soup wont fix!" She was lying, she felt all but alright. It was as if to of the most powerful beings in existence had collided creating one super powerful being capable of tearing the universe apart strand by strand. It was a random nobleman's ball and it's her royal duty to attend no matter how inconvenient. She didn't even know who it was. Some duke in a eastern part of the Kingdom anyway.
The other princesses were also attending. They where far more accustomed to these types of events and tended to handle everything. The night was coming to an end anyway. The town they were currently in was small and quiet so the Royal Train approach from a mile away to take her friends back to their homes. She was hoping for something to stir up the night. The night had concluded and the party's attendants were heading home. The train bound for Ponyville was at the station.
The girls where all seated and ready to go Twilight lazily look out the window and began day dreaming, the princesses took their carriage back to Canterlott. Eventually the thought of sleep overwhelmed the princesses mind and eventually took over sending Twilight into a deep comfortable sleep.
Nicolas finished buttoning up his uniform, Hitler was sound asleep on top of his desk. He was curled up like a cat, the sight made Nic's heart melt. He'd been through so much in so little time. It was actually sad to see such a beautiful human being going through so much torment. He left the room with a frown on his face. Hitler's plan had to work. And Cage was going to make sure it did. He stormed down the many hallways and rooms of the bunker until he came to a large elevator. It was occupied with various SS soldiers and officers all heading to the same location.
At the bottom of the bunker, in the very depths of the world, was a humongous laboratory, the heart of all Nazi scientific development for the past 20 or so years. At the centre of the lab was a large chamber and in the middle of that room was a huge machine. A lone scientist was working the many dials on the contraption.
"Sieg Heil!" The scientist gave a salute in which Cage returned.
"How goes the operation?"
"Fine sir! Just a little while more and we should be able to rip a hole straight through the world of reality into the world of hope and dreams." The scientist returned happily. The machine operated on the unfortunate resource of Jew blood but it would all end up worth it in the end just as long as Adolf gets his last wish.
The beast began bellowing and lighting up and shit, the scientist laughing criminally.
"The machine is ready!" He shouted over the noise. cage ran to the nearest phone. It ringed a few times before someone answered. An assortment of noises could be heard.
"Mien Fuhrer... It's ready."
