Edit Keith Spawn

by Blitzer Sparks

Rating: teen
Tags: Alternate Universe, Human, Princess Luna, Original Character, Comedy, Random, Adventure, Princess Celestia, Main 6, Discord, Gore, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 15655

My first story so please no bad comments as I just came up with it. A strange person with strange powers of creation goes to Equestria on accident in hope to escape his home world. note that this will not follow the main story

Edit Keith Spawn Born with strange powers he use to escape his world because at birth he was kept away from all life not even knowing his home world's name, but through trail and error will he be able to make friends or not. This person has spent his entire life locked in solitude with humans running dangerous test on him. He will no longer let this go by day after day, he will find his own light to guide him, who knows it might even be with ponies, something that he won't expect

Published 2014-01-03 17:50:04 UTC
Last updated 2014-02-01 19:13:05 UTC

Arrival

------secret base-------
alarms go off.

"HALT! Subdue the specimen"

"Fuck you all, i'm getting outta here and you wont stop me!" I hold out both hands as two orbs of blue light form in my hand, the one in my left hand turns into a(n) AR clip and in the right hand the last orb forms into my personal favorite gun a G36C. I slam the clip into the gun as I run down the hall, cock a bullet in the chamber, spin and jump into the air, and unloaded the entire clip into the black outlines of people with guns running at me with guns. I keep running "huh? i guess they forgot I have the ability of spawning" I chuckle "to easy."

"Oh is it, well lets how you see fair against this" before I had time to react a huge metallic hand slammed into me and threw me into a wall of a huge room I had just come to. I wiped the blood the had poured from my mouth off and with a smile non the less

"You know Dr. Grief" I spit the blood from my mouth out "you are truly one for cheap shots" I looked at the small man operating a robot he believed to be my down fall.

"Return to your holding cell Edit, and you wont be hurt"

"Aww are you getting soft on me doc last I check you wanted to put me through painful experiments and find out what made me tick, why not treat this like an experiment" I finished with a smile

"Your a wordy little brat aren't you?"

"18 years of nothing but reading, it'll happen to ya" I said nonchalantly

"Well then Edit prepare for your down-" !!!BOOM!!!

"Yeah in the middle of your ranting that I wasn't listening to I spawned a drill and ran it through your robot" I said as the soot covered doctor fell to the ground. I walked up to him pulled out his key card "now which way to the library" I ordered him holding a newly formed sword to his neck. His hand snaps to a door to the left of us. "Good, now if I don't find it I'm gonna come back for you" I finished with a scowl. I walked to the door and opened it with the card instead of blowing it down.

Inside there was a console, I pressed a button that said 'search' and typed in 'portals' and various information came up mainly stuff about on how to form them and use them, "perfect" I said with a smile. I formed a green orb in my hand and threw it at a wall suddenly it started to form a spinning hole of green energy. I was about to step into it before I heard a crack shot of a gun and a searing pain in my shoulder I spun around, and I saw the doctor I swear I just fried, pointing a gun at me, oh I am pissed now.

"You know I was going to leave with as least deaths as possible but you can forget it now" a red orb of energy formed in my hand at stretched into a flaming spear "I'll see you in hell doc, oh and the names Keith, Bitch!" I said as I threw the spear at him at the speed of sound. The spear completely impaled him and nailed him to the wall behind him. Satisfied I walked back to the portal which was slowly closing.

"One more thing to do" blue energy formed in front of me as it grew I knew I would have to run. A nuke appeared before me, I walked up to it and armed it to go off in thirty seconds. "just enough time" I book it to the portal, and jump through it not knowing were it would take me, although I did hear a satisfying boom.

------ponyville------

"Hey A.J. me and the girls have some free time today we just wanted to know if you needed any help" a certain purple unicorn asked

"Actually twi I just finished all my work for the day, i was thinking of goin and gettin a bite to eat Twi, would ya'll like to come?"

"Sure Applejack, we'd love to right girls?"

Fluttershy, Rarity, Rainbow Dash, and... wait wheres Pinkie Pie "Pinkie where you" RD shouted "shh, i'm over here."

We all saw a pink hoof rise from a bush and waved them over, sure enough all five of them with the exception of Rainbow Dash who flew as the others walked to the bush

"Pinkie what in tarnation are ya doi-" A.J.'s sentence was cut short as all of them were pulled into the bush

"I said "shh" so be quiet!" Pinkie whispered/yelled. At that remark all of them went quiet unsure of what to do. That is, until a hole of spinning green energy formed out of no where in the middle of the field

"Pinkie, what is that thing!?" Twilight yelled. Thankfully it went unheard because what followed was a very loud boom, a plume of fire, and a bipedal creature that was flung out of it, and as soon as it did the hole closed leaving the creature to pat down his body as though looking for something

"NO, NO, NO, WHERE DID I PUT THEM!" the creature yelled. He stood there for a few seconds before what looked to be the equivalent of a facehoof

"Duh" the creature said as, is it a he? the creature belched, yup defiantly a he, he snapped his fingers. A simple pair of sunglasses appeared in front of him, he reached out and put them on covering his eyes completely. I have to get in front of him I need a better look at this creature.

"Twilight, dear, don't even think about it" Rarity said

"Think about what?"

"You know well what, your thinking of getting closer to him to get more information"

"Don't be silly Rarity" with that said Twilight's horn flared up and with a flash she was gone. They all let out a simultaneous groan because they all know where she went as they all turned back to the creature.

"Now lets see if i'm okay now that I poof'd my sunglasses into existence, feet, check, legs check, flash of light that i'm not paying attention to check, torso check, arms check, hands check, fingers check, face still sexy check, purple unicorn that is talking to me"

"Hi, I'm Twilight Sparkle"

"Check, my head check, my mind fucking blown to bits and shitted on, and blown up again" I casually walked up to a boulder, and slammed my head into it completely splitting it in half, and passing out.

---------Twilight view---------

I gasped at what he did, but what scared me the most was a pink and yellow blur that appeared over him

"Fluttershy what are you doing to him?"

"Quick lets get him to you place Twilight he may have a concussion, and my house is to far away"

"Umm, okay, everyone get close" I said to the remainder of the group that had been left behind that just arrived, and I teleported us all back to the library.

Introductions

"Man I had the weirdest dream, there was a purple talking unicorn, and I hit my head on that rock, and *groan* I Have a mind splitting headache" I said without opening my eyes.

"Shh everypony, he's waking up" a soft female voice said.

Oh thank god peopl... wait did she just say pony? I snapped my eyes open and sat up, and honestly for the first time in my life I was blown away by stupidity. Here sitting in front of me where six ponies, and all different colors. Oh I get it freak out the new guy... where ever the hell I am and who ever knows about me and is presumably my friend.

"Okay this isn't funny where all the people?" I shouted

"umm nope no people here only ponies" a pink mare with a super puffy mane said.

"...HOLY SHIT DID THAT PONY JUST TALK!?"

"y-yes mr. creature she did, are you okay?"

"Yup going insane" I said with a rather shaky tone as I got up and made for what looked like a door, but not before I said something extremely stupid.

"Fucking weird ass ponies." Before I could make it to the door a lasso looped around my waist, binding my arms to my side, bad move on the person who is holding the lasso. I looked behind me, and what surprised me the most was a orange mare wearing a stetson... nice hat... holding the rope in her teeth.

"Ah'd appreciate it if ya'll didn't insult us so rudely"

"Oh so you wanna play" I said completely disregarding the other five ponies who where staring at me. "Well how bout I tie you up instead" the orange pony spoke in a southern accent... somehow.

"Nah I think I'd rather tie you up instead" I said to the pony, huh must be getting use to talking to ponies... weird

"Now how do ya reckon you gonna do that your all tied up"

"Simple" I snapped my right fingers, and held out my hand in a flat position, a sword popped into it, I cut the rope, made the sword disappear, take hold of the rope, flick the rope wrapping it around her muzzle, and pulling on the rope I launched myself at her all in a brief moment.

In that moment I saw fear in her eyes, so I decided against it. Instead of me punching her lights out, I formed a small dagger, and when I was close enough I took hold of the ropes around her muzzle, and cut her free.

After wards, I was tackled, hard, by a rainbow blur. "what the crap?"

"Get away from her!" A tomboyish voice cried out. "okay now i'm getting annoyed" I said as I pushed the cyan pony with a rainbow main off of me. It quickly took a stance as though she was going to pounce on me with her wings flared, so I decided to take my own personal stance.

My right foot out in front of me, and adding my weight to my left leg, and holding my right hand out in front of me with my left hand behind my back. "So your a pegasus huh?"

This would have continued if a familiar purple unicorn hadn't spoken up "STOP!!!"

"Hang on Twilight, kinda in the middle of something here" the cyan pegasus with the tomboyish voice told apparently Twilight.

"Well i dont know about you... Rainbow," aww yeah only a few hours in and I already have a nick name for her "But I prefer to talk things out before subduing to violence" I calmly said as I came out of my stance, yep, defiantly used to the strange talking ponies, even though a few hours ago I was slamming my head into the wall.

"Hey how do you know my name?" the cyan pegasus asked me cautiously

"Well actually I just gave you a nickname since I didn't know it, so since your main is strangely rainbow colored I came up with 'rainbow' see simple" I concluded with a cocky grin.

It was funny, she looked at me with a deadpanned face and said "oh."

I watched as Twilight walked in between me and whatever the cyan faced mare's name was.

"Alright everypony now that... "that" is out of the way I believe you have some explaining to do mister" Twilight said to me

"I have explaining to do are you kidding me right now, I was assaulted by her over there, then I was tackled by Rainbow over there" I retorted, she looked shocked, almost as though she thought of me as a stupid monk... wait, I am an ape aren't I? aww well, then she spoke up

"none the less you, scared Applejack" she gestured to the orange mare wearing the stetson "and you broke my table" she gestured to her table "plus we have no idea who YOU are" she thrusted a hoof at me.

Hmm I think she is mad at me but for what ever for? "Well my name is E. Keith S., but you can just call me Keith"

"What is your full name?"

*sigh* I knew this would happen "my full name is Edit Keith Spawn, but I hate my first and last name with a passion so please just call me Keith"

"Okay now why do you..."

I cut her off "whoa whoa whoa hold up you asked me a question now I get to ask you one, who are you, and them?" I said gesturing to everyone inside.

"Oh I forgot to introduce everyone, This is Rainbow Dash" she gestured towards the cyan mare that was giving me a death glare

"huh? so I did get your name right" I said as I held out my hand to her, she placed her hoof in it and we shook.

"Next, we have Applejack" Twilight said

"Well it's better to meet ya on better term, partner" The country pony tipped her hat in my direction.

Oh I couldn't help it. I snapped my fingers making a black stetson with a golden collar, and tipped it as well "Like wise ma'am" and with another snap of the fingers the hat was gone

"Oh and sorry about tying you up" I said

"It's okay Keith, ah'm sorry to" she said this while trying to hide a blush under her hat.

"This is Pinkie Pie." Twilight chimed in pointing to the pink mare.

"Hello" was all I could get out before she let out a huge gasp, and bolted out the door in a pink blur "umm... What just happened?"

"Don't worry darling thats just Pinkie being Pinkie, OH! how unlady like of me, my name is Rarity" a stunning white mare with a dark blue / purple mane, one of the two, said.

"Oh mon Dieu, vous regardez rareté étonnante de madame" I said in french. To translate I said 'oh my, you look stunning madam Rarity.' She blushed hard, the fact she had a white coat didn't help her much

"Oh my I didn't know you could speak Prench"

"Well I heard it was the language of love" I said to her with a wink... then the realization hit me. Did I just hit on a pony? well'p guess it pays of to be me (chuckle), is it just me or is her body turning red? I looked at the blushing white mare with a smile "are you okay Rarity?"

"wh-what oh yes erm i'm fine, umm please excuse me but umm I have uh that thing, YES! that thing I must attend, well untill next time darling ta-ta!" She said as she rushed out of the door, almost as fast as Pinkie Pie.

"Well that was umm, okay let's move on this is Fluttershy" Twilight said.

"OH h-hello mr. creature, I hope your okay, you did hit your head really hard"

"Please just call me Keith, and yes i'm fine Fluttershy thank you for asking" I said with a smile, and nod of the head. After I met Fluttershy a certain white mare strode back into the library, and sat down a little to close for comfort next to me.

"And I'm Twilight Sparkle"

"Well its nice to meet you to Twilight without having to smash any rocks" I said with a smile.

"Likwise" Twilight said.

Confrontations

*KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK* is all I heard before Twilight's door exploded outward, and a light pink pony with a horn, and wings, with a pink, blue, and green mane that wavered in the air, stepped through the door.

"Princess Celestia!" Twilight said happily,

"Yes Twilight not now where is this new creature you talked about in your letter?"

"Oh him, he is right there on the couch" as soon as Twilight finished her sentence, Celestia's horn flared up and I was wrapped in a golden aura, and she literally slammed me through the fucking wall, now i'm pissed.

I spawned seven ice shards that floated around me "what the hell was that for" I shouted at Celestia. I launched all of the shards at her, she narrowly dodged them and was headed straight for Twilight. "Twilight look out!" I shouted, as I teleported next to her, and pushed her out of the way. *sigh* fuck.

Surprisingly enough only one of the shards hit me but instead of impaling me it exploded into a fiery inferno, and engulfing me entirely.

Celestia stood there shocked of the fact that Twilight was almost hurt and that ape saved her 'maybe he isn't that bad' she though.'

"SURPRISE!!!" I popped out of a hole in the ground that I formed and forced palmed her right in the jaw... muzzle... whatever.

She went a few feet in the air "Never Mind" she said as she extended her wings.

She charged up her her horn and unleashed a beam of sunlight at me.

I dodge to my left narrowly avoiding getting blasted in the face with condensed light. Then it hit me, she is only using light based attacks, good thing I studied up on light, and darkness, so I know how to deal with her. I stood in place, and started to concentrate into the deepest, and darkest pits of my mind. As I stood there in a wrestling stance to keep my balance as I focused, Celestia summoned several swords that was radiating energy from them, and launched every single one right at me. All of a sudden I heard five voices shout my name right behind me "KEITH!!!" my eyes snapped open with darkness seeping from the edges of them. If I let even one of the swords get past me they'll get hurt I wont let that happen. The swords hit me dead on, and I took everyone of them, and what came to a surprise to everyone, except me. The swords floated around me, and turned pitch black.

"YOU CALL YOURSELF A PRINCESS, YOU COULD HAVE HURT THEM!!!" I shouted in a demonic tone as I gestured to the five of them who were holding each other "YOU ALMOST HURT MY FRIENDS" or at least I think they are, I launched the swords of darkness at Celestia, slashing and cutting her everywhere.

After the onslaught of my swords that she wasn't expecting, slumped to the ground passed out as she lay there writhing in pain.

After my initial rage was quelled I rushed over to her to see if she was okay, along with a collective gasps five mares ran over to see if their princess was okay.

I scooped up Celestia and rested her on my back, and looked to the hyperventilating Twilight right in her tear soaked eyes, and said "Where is the nearest hospital Twilight" she managed to get her breathing under control enough, and spoke.

"O-on the o-other s-side of ponyville"

"Okay, i'm sure that's far, so Twilight focus on the hospital, and i'll take us all there, okay?"

"o-okay" she finished and started to focus on it I lightly touched her horn with my right index finger, and all seven of u... Okay eight of us, theres Pinkie Pie, she waved at me happily, we were covered in a orb of white energy, and suddenly with a flash we were gone.

Author's Note

Just so everyone knows Celestia was testing Keith and is far stronger than I make her out to be, and that she was in control of the entire situation. Also the mane six will most of the time be out of harms way.

Also sorry for the short chapter

What Follows Night

"For the seventh time, I'm sorry Twilight I didn't know what to do, and if any of them got passed me they would have got you and everyone else could have got hurt"

"OKAY! I get it your upset, but i'm not mad just disappointed with you"

Ouch she pulled that card on me, okay now i'm really starting to regret hurting Celestia. I sigh as I wait in the E.R. with the group apparently called the "mane 6" waiting to hear the news of the Princess' health, that was till a blue lightning bolt blasted a hole in the ceiling, as a blue alicorn dropped down from the hole looking furious, I just sat there with a blank expression as I leaned back on the chair that I spawned because I sensed no immediate danger.

"YOU THERE!!!" the force of her voice literally flung me back and slammed me into the wall, that fucking hurt, I pulled myself out of the hole that is shaped like me. As soon as I did she was in my face again, aw shit.

"YOU HAVE HURT THY FAMILY AND ONLY SISTER, YOU SHALL PAY!!!" I was slammed into the wall a second time.

I laughed hard.

"WHY DOES YE LAUGH AT ONES OWN DEMISE, HAVE YOU NO HEART!!!"

"I have a heart but I do not care for those who go out of their way to hurt the innocent" I said rather calmly.

She looked at me in shock "YOU HAVE HARMED THY SISTER AND YOU CLAIM TO BE INNOCENT!!!"

I was slammed into the the wall that I had pulled myself from just 5 seconds ago. this is starting to get really annoying "I never said I was innocent, I was protecting 6 mares from being sliced to death by your sister"

The blue alicorn was giving off an intense aura of rage emitting from her "I hurt her, yes, do I feel bad about hurting her, yes, but I will never fret upon the past" I looked at the crown atop her head "princess..."

Her horn lit up like a raging blue inferno, and was about to blast me to who knows where, until a white hoof was place on her shoulder

"Luna, sister, stop this, i'm fine" the blue alicorn named Luna turned around, and hugged her sister, Celestia.

"Sister your okay?" Luna asked

"I'm fine, it'll take more than a few cuts to bring me down, and Keith" Celestia said my name with a cheerful glee that i'm less than comfortable with.

"What?" I ask on guard in case she tries anything funny

"Relax I mean you no harm, you have displayed great traits, you have defended your friends from harm, and have stuck by your actions, and defended the defenseless in a time when you could have saved yourself instead you stayed by your friends side" she said.

"Well yeah anyone would have have done the same for their friends, but why are you stating the obvious?"

"Quick to the point I see, I like that, but I wish to grant you a stay in ponyville"

"WHAT!?" everyone screamed

"I just wish you would be a bit nicer is all, and i'm sure that with the help of your friends you'll be the nicest pony out there" she finished with a smile

"Yeah whatever your say hothead or is it the fact you just dont want me around large civilized areas because of my destructive power" I said with a smile.

Just then everyone burst out into laughter, not cool

"Hey Luna"

"What is it ape?"

"How would you and your sister do without magic or flying for a day?" I grinned as I snapped my fingers. A loud echo and tremor went through the hospital.

"Foalish mortal you cannot stop our power" Luna said simply

"Okay then try to hover in the air or use magic to prove me wrong then" Luna jumped into the air, and unfurled her wings only to face plant on the floor

"Lulu! Are you okay" Celestia said as she tried to focus her magic but could not.

"Oh i'm sorry are you looking for these."

I pulled out four glowing balls two of them had a mark of a sun ablaze while the color of the orbs were a bright pink while the other was a sky blue and the other two a crescent moon in front of a ink blot but these ones were black and dark blue.

I watched as Celestia's mane went from the green, blue, and pink color to a single green. I took their magic and pegasus abilities.

"Now say your sorry, and I'll give them back" Luna just glared daggers at me, man if looks could kill

"I'm sorry for laughing at you Edit" I stared at her because of the use of my first name

"Well thank you for the apology Celestia here you go" I tossed her her orbs as she somehow caught them with her hooves.

She looked at me with a confused face, and asked "What do I do with these?"

"Just smash them together" she did just that.

I watched as her power seeped back into her body as her hair returned back to the three colors, you know she doesn't look half bad,

"Now that that is takin care of, sister don't you have something to say"

Luna spoke but her voice was muffled

"Luna say sorr-..."

I cut her off "it's okay I speak muffle here you go" I tossed her, her balls

***

Me and the other mares and two princesses left the hospital, 'maybe I should stay for a while, see all the stupid that'll happen'

Just then Pinkie appeared in front of me with the biggest smile ever "guesswhattolatei'lltellyouanywayi'mgonnnathrowyouawelcometoponyvillepartyattwilightsok,ok!"

".........yes"

Pinkie then shot off in a pink blur.

"Thats pinkie for ya, so partner you got any questions?" AJ asked

"A few, is Pinkie naturally like that or is it a one time thing?"

Everyone sighed and claimed "Pinkie" together. we started walking to ponyville.

"Hey ah gots a question fer ya, how'd you do all that stuff when fighting the tha princess there?"

"Yes that troubled me too, how did you do all that Edit?" Celestia added

"First of all call me Keith, secondly, my power is too allow me to spawn or edit with equal or less power than myself, and since I took away your abilities not too long ago, it means I have greater power than you, and really though my name should have given it away"

Twilight glared at me for belittling her princess

"What it's true" I stated as I started to float in the air. "Okay my turn" I floated upside down in front of Luna "who are YOU" I said as I poked her in the nose

"I promise you I will send you to the depths of Tartarus ape!" she yelled at me with modern speak and without blowing my ear drums out

"not my question Luna"

"You will address me as "Princess" Luna is that understood?"

I completely ignored her while I spawned a carrot, and proceeded to open Celesia's muzzle, against her will, and shove the carrot in her mouth, closed her mouth, forced her to chew, lifted her head up, and pat her back which made her wings flair and swallow the carrot.

"So are you ready to answer the question now?" Twilight was giving me a death glare and breathing smoke from her nose while being held back by AJ and Rainbow Dash who had huge grins on there faces like everyone else, as Luna wash laughing her flank off on the ground and actually shedding tear she managed to speak

"I-i-i am Princess Luna (hysterical laughter) c-c-co ruler of eque-equestria (laughter) a-and prr-princess of the night (wheezing and snickering) perhaps you are not all bad... Keith"

Celestia whole body turned a bright red, and flew off at the speed of light

"Thank you you highness may we meet again?" I asked

"Keith call me Luna, also your welcomed at the palace anytime you'd like, and yes we can seeing as i'm not that busy at night, farewell"

"Bye Luna, safe travelings" I watched her fly away. So what's there to do for fun around here because I ain't tired and the night is still young?"

"well how about a party?" pinkie said appearing out of no where.

"Sounds good to me, lead the way my fourth wall breaking, physic defying, no logic, pink pony friend."

"okay!" Pinkie pie pulled a large zipper from no where placed it in the air, and pulled down. On the other side was a library with ponies and party supplies everywhere.

"This is going to be a real party now that i'm here" I said

"Please i'm the only true party pony" Pinkie piped up

"Oh whatever even if you defy logic in every way I can still party harder than you" everyone suddenly stopped what they were doing and stared at us.

"Is that a challenge?" Pinkie Pie asked in a threatening tone

"Why yes, yes it is"

"Your so going down!"

Author's Note

The next chapter will hopefully be up in a week or around that time frame as it's a big chapter

Party Time

Author's Note

This was just a mess around chapter and has no real value till the end and that I was board and wanted to do something fun, so enjoy

Party Time

I snapped my fingers and spawned a table full of beer, kegs, and other beverages that would destroy someone's insides

"Lets begin by seeing who can drink more"

"Okie Dokie Lokie"

Rainbow Dash then decided to step in "I'm so in, you both going down!"

Twilight levitated 3 trays that held 10 shot glasses filled with light alcohol each in front of RD, Keith, and Pinkie

"I can't believe i'm doing this" Twilight said as she walk out from around the corner wearing a tight white T-shirt, and black spandex. Rainbow just smiled and winked, Keith was whistling profoundly.

Pinkie, and surprisingly Celestia stared at her flank, who both proceeded to say " DAYUUM GIRL!"

Twilight blushed at her mentor's antics. "Round one!" Twilight spoke as she held up the sign that said 'round one' with her hooves.

Rainbow was first to reach her glass, and downed it immediately. She looked over at Keith, and Pinkie, her eyes widened both were already 2 shots ahead. It was getting close now Pinkie had accidentally choked on a shot which put her behind one shot behind RD who was on her 5th, while Keith on his 6th.

Keith had suddenly gotten a stupid idea that might just work, he unblocked the back of his throat, and threw the liquid from his last 4 shots in the air, and downed each one with rapid success. Rainbow finished a little before Pinkie.

"Winner of round one, Keith!" A white mare with an electric blue mane shouted into a microphone attached to a set of turn tables. "NOOOOO HOW COULD I LOOSE" Rainbow shouted into the face of some random pony over a table.

Pinkie Pie pouted "no fair"

"Better luck next time Pinkie, I'm a natural a drinking" Keith said

"It's okay at least i'm taking my drinks better than RD over there.

Rainbow Dash was laying on a table, passed out from how fast she drank

"I'll take her home" the timid yellow pegasus know as Fluttershy spoke up.

"So whats round 2 gonna be?" Keith asked Pinkie

"who can make the most craziest thing happen"

"Your so on"

Twilight levitated the sign this time that said 'round 2'

Twilight was a bit preoccupied in a back room with Celestia for a "Private session" involving what happens when a horn gets dirty, whats best to clean it with a rag or "OH CELESTIA LICK IT FASTER AAAAHHHHHH" ummm Ignoriing.

Pinkie started of by snatching the white mare away from here turn tables

"Hey Pinkie whats the big idea!"

"Relax Vinyl I'm just borrowing your body for a sec" The white mare blushed at her choice of words. Pinkie pushed hey head down with one hoof, pulled on her tail, which made the mares head snap up and form a multi-hued ball of light. Then Pinkie pushed the mares tail back and used it as a crank making the ball spin creating a spinning strobe light show that floated into the air and burst into dazzling sparkles that floated to the floor.

"hah! top that" Pinkie said

"A Challenge Given, A Challenge Received." Keith slammed his hands together, and slowly started to pull them apart. Something pink was slowly starting to spawn, it was a pink fluffy earth pony mare that held a remote control with a single word on it *pompf*

"YOU... WOULDN'T... DARE..." Pinkie Pie said threateningly

"PILLOW MASTER, FFFFIIIIIIIRRRRREE" the mare pressed the button, after she did all you hear is a loud *POMPF* come from the sky, and see Pinkie running for her life.

"NNNNNOOOOOOOOO-" Pinkie yelled but was cut short. *POMPF* a pillow suddenly hit Pinkie Pie in the head, she turned around with the pillow still on her head, and walked back to the library.

"Thank you master of the pillows, for your assistance" Keith bowed to the pillow master.

The mare crossed her eyes, stuck out her tongue and blew on it very quickly.

"Thank you master" Keith said. The mare jumped into the crowed and started to drag a black insect type thing with a horn into a pillow hut with a sign the said 'fun cave' everyone heard a laugh come from the hut.

"OK Keith you win this round" Pinkie said with a grin on her face, as she shook off the pillow. "But it's time for round 3"

"Whats round 3?" I asked

"Who can make the best treats for everypony to eat"

"Your so on" I finshed, as I slammed a book shut I had been reading after I finished summoning the pillow master the title of the book is: "Pony Diets, Whats Good and Whats Not"

Twilight, and Celestia walk out from the back room, Twilights mane was a mess and she smelt of something, I cant quite put my finger on it aww well, Celestia smelt the same as Twilight, except that Twilight wasn't wearing the cloths, and Celestia was. Also it got a lot of cheers from the stallions who were drunk. Celestia is acting awfully stranger since our last meet, I wonder what happened.

***
Just after Celestia's departure from Keith.

"Sweet mother of me i'm really turned on right now, damn you Keith why'd you go and shove a long... hard... no! It was just a carrot nothing to..." Celestia's sentence was cut short as she stared at a white puffy cloud "oh to Tartarus with it" She landed on the cloud and started to sing "I'm walking on sunshine wwwwooooaahh, I'm walking on sunshine wwwwooooaaahhh, and dont it feel good!" Good now that thats out of the way time to

"LOOK OUT LOOK OUT LOOK OUT!"

Celestia turned her head only to see a rainbow blur slam into her, but the blur wasn't there anymore in fact she didn't feel a thi... Her pupils shrank, and shouted loudly "IIIIIII CCCCCCAAAAAAAAMMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEE!!!!"

***
Back at the party

Celestia held up the sign with gusto "RRRRROOOOUUUNNDDD TTTHHHRRREEEE!" she shouted.

Pinkie Pulled out a over from no where and started to make cupcakes at breakneck speed. I was stunned of how fast she had gone from nothing to 13 dozen cupcakes. I quickly looked around for something to make until I saw a grey pegasus mare, blond mane, and walled eyed stare eating a muffin.

I smiled as a stupid thought came to mind. I hastily poof'd up a muffin with a twirl of the hands, then I looked around again and found what I was looking for, on a stallions shirt was a bright red button. I snapped of the button much to the displeasure of the random guy, and floated both the button and the muffin in the air.

I slid open a blue dashboard into the air with a swipe of the hand and tapped on the icon that said 'smart ass fuser.' A dual end portal poped up in front of me, one side blue, one side red. I threw the items into the blue side and from the red side came one of my favorite things "aaahhhhhhh Hello again my muffin button" DAMN SHES ALREADY AT 37 DOZEN? I gotta move fast. I set the button on the ground, as i spawned a jackhammer, and placed it on the button and turned it on.

Muffins had started appearing behind me a tad bit faster than Pinkie was cooking her cupcakes, so I was painfully slowly catching...

"And Thats Time! Sorry Keith" Vinyl said

"It's all good, I had fun besides the muffins weren't that good"

"Really? she seems to enjoy them." Pinkie piped up and pointed to a grey mare that was swimming in the mountain of muffins.

"Okay then well now that we have provided food for the party, whats round four going to be?"

"How about we see who can do the pony polka the best?"

"Nope, nu-uh, no, nada, never, you win this one only because I refuse to do a dance that sounds so retarded, so retarded in fact I forfeit, and you are the only true party pony" I claim in annoyance and defeat.

"WWWWWWOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHH! IT'S PINKIE PIE HER AND I KNOW YOU WONT MISS ME BUT WAIT THERES ROOM FOR THREEEEE, KEITH GUMMIE AND ME NOW IT'S A PARTY!!!!!!!"

"Well I love to keep partying with you pinkie but I'm tired so I'm going to bed" I started to walk to the door so I could find a nice comfy rock to sleep on.

"Okay bye Keith it was fun partying with you"

Rarity then jumped in "Oh my Keith it seems you dont have a place to stay tonight, how would you like to come sleep with me at my place tonight"

"Inviting someone you just meet into your home, what do you take me for some kind of cheap whore!" I said in a fake angry dramatic tone

"N-no no that not what I meant at all I umm I uh w-what?" she stuttered out and blushed

"Relax Rarity I dont mind, just the way you worded it so I had to make a joke, but I wouldn't mind a place to sleep tonight, thank you for the offer"

"Oh well umm l uh lets never speak of this again, alright, okay, lets be on our way then" she pushed the door open and walked out hiding her face with her mane

"Well this going to be one interesting night" I walked out the door and caught up with Rarity

"What a lovely night, wouldn't you agree Keith?" she spoke softly to the sky letting the moonlight shine on her

"Yes rarity it's very beautiful out tonight"

"Anything in particular that has caught your eye?" she turned to me batting her eyes

"Well the stars are very noticeable here and tonights not that cold but not to hot luckily i'm here with with you" I said looking to the sky in aww.

"Oh Keith you have such a marvelous way with words" she leaned on you closing her eyes

"Umm Rarity what are you doing?"

She snapped her eyes open and stood straight "I uh umm nothing, let us be on our way" she said quickly

We finally came to her home, a giant carousel.

"Welcome to the Carousel Boutique, and your new home!" she said with nervousness and happiness

"It looks very good Rarity" I said looking at all the mannequins, dresses, and cloth "and by my guess your a fashion designer"

"Yes I am and i'm very proud of my work, in fact your appearance, of a black hair, light brown, and red eyes it is very unique I only know one other pony that has red eyes, but she is in manehattan right now, oh this gives me an idea" she said lost in thought.

"okay then... where do I sleep?" I asked without wanting to know how she knows so much about my physic

"Well you can always sleep with me" she said not comprehending what she just said, but then her head snapped upwards with a blush and turned to a smirking me to her horror that she just revealed her affection for me

"Well would you like me to sleep with you?"

"NO! I MEAN YES I MEAN I UMM heh" she passed out from embarrassment

"RARITY!" i yelled as I caught her before she hit the ground "well lets get you to be Rares I think you've earned it" I took her upstairs to the largest room that I assumed was hers, laid her on the bed, and covered her with the blanket.

She smiled and whispered "Keith"

As I walked away I heard her speak again in her sleep

"Keith please dont go" she spoke with a whimper at the end

"Damn i'm a sucker for dames in distress" I said as I took off my shirt and glasses, and placed them on a night stand. Then I crawled into bed with Rarity

Discord

I awoke to hear giggling all around me, and something warm and soft pressed up against my chest so I looked down only to see Rarity's back pressed up against me. Then I looked up to see Twilight, Apple Jack, Pinkie Pie, Fluttershy, and Rainbow Dash all standing next to the bedside with smirks on their faces.

"Ah reckon we oughtta leave you and Rarity here ta yer spoonin" AJ said as all the girls walked out still smilling

"Wait it's not what you th-" the door slammed shut "-ink"

After the door was slammed shut Rarity woke up and noticed the position she was in "Keith Get Off Of Me!" she then pushed me off her onto the ground.

"What the hell Rarity that hurt" I said as I stood up only to be slapped in the face by a white hoof, 'damn that hurt'

"HOW DARE YOU TRY AND TAKE ADVANTAGE OF ME!" Rarity screamed in my face

"Thats not what happened, last night after you passed out you were talking in your sleep, and said for me not to go, so I slept with you, I didn't touch you I swear, I was just trying to let you sleep easy" I said quickly

"GET OUT!" she screamed again, then pick me and my stuff up with her magic and threw me out her room door and down the stair.

I came to a stop at the hooves of 5 mares

"So mr. Human have fun with Rarity last night" Pinkie said with a wink

"I... Hate... All of you" I said with a groan picking myself up and putting on my shirt, and poof'd my glasses away for later use.

"Ah come on Keith were just havin a little fun" AJ piped in

"Yes AJ fun is getting pushed out of bed, fun is being slapped by a hoof which hurts incredibly, and fun is getting thrown down the stairs like a rag doll hitting nearly every step on the way down, and that's from you just slamming the door and waking up Rarity" I fumed

"Oh were sorry Keith" Fluttershy whispered

"It's fine, I'm gonna go for a walk" I said but I was pissed thoroughly

I opened the door but was shocked at what I saw "Umm Twilight how long have you been here exactly" I said as I stared out the door

"For a couple hours why" Twilight said walking behind me

"Thats why" I said stepping out of the door frame

"Discord" she said with venom in her voice as she stared at upside down houses, lightning clouds chasing ponies, soapy earth, the moon and sun constantly changing positions, and Herbivores turning into Predators

"Who is Discord and why is everything so... chaotic?"

"Discord is the god of chaos and apparently even after we reformed him, he is back recking havoc again"

"So let me get this straight this Discord is a god of chaos that you reformed to be good and he has turned evil once again. Right?"

"Precisely"

"Well then how can I help"

"Go to the Library and retrieve the elements, there are six of them one is a tiara with a magic star on top the other are necklaces you'll know what they look like, now go"

"Right" I swiped my hand through the air opening my dashboard I selected 'body' then 'legs' and turned the speed up to max of 185 mph "I'll be back" and I took off

-------Twilight's (POV)-------

"Alright girls lets split up and find Discord, and Fluttershy go get Rarity out of her room" I said

"Oh thats funny because isn't that Rarity in a cage that Discord is holding?" Pinkie Pie said pointing out the window with a smile.

My pupils shrank and ran to the window to see Discord holding a cage with a passed out Rarity inside it flying away "Quick follow him!" I shouted and we all ran out the door

--------Keith's (POV)--------
--------shortly after----------

"Twilight I'm back with the golden necklace thingies and your retarded looking tiara" I said walking into the shop wearing the necklaces around my neck and tiara atop my head. I looked around the boutique only to find emptiness. "Huh were did everyone go?"

"HA HA HA HA HAAAA Welcome back Keith"

The doors shut and blinds dropped leaving me in darkness "Who are you? What did you do to the girls? Show Yourself!" I yelled into the darkness as I spawned a flashlight and a Colt 1911 pistol, then going into tactical position I turned on the light.

"Come now Keith i'm only looking to have a little bit of fun"

The voice came from the left so I snapped the light to the voice, there standing was a strange creature that had a mixture of body parts "Who are you!?" I yelled

"Why little o'll me, i'm just a all powerful god of chaos here to retrieve the elements and possible kill you if you do not comply"

"Well damn when you put it like that I guess I dont have much of a choice" I said as I placed the light on the ground illuminating the room. I took off the elements and held them out for it to take them, 'while he is distracted i'll infuse my bullets with light that oughta work'

"Thats a good boy Keith give them to Discord" he said reaching out for them

I smiled and aimed the gun at him and pulled the trigger 3 times in rapid success, blood stained the wall from were I shot him "Yeah how about I dont give the elements to a god of chaos, I like that idea better.

I watched it fall to the ground "I will have my vengeance Keith just you wait. i'll be back"

"How can you be back if you were never here, clone" I said as I tasted the ketchup off the wall "oh yeah if Rarity hated me now (chuckle) Just wait till she sees her stained dresses"

"Well I Guess it wont be so easy to trick, meet me in the middle Ponyville or your friends die"

"I'll be there" I said as the clone vanished in a cloud of smoke. Then I proceeded too kick the locked door of the boutique down "I'm coming girls, just hang on"

Now that I can see again I opened up my dashboard and hit 'scan' after I scanned the elements I hit 'appearance' the pink butterfly necklace turned into a anklet and put it on my right ankle. Then I turned the orange apple necklace into another anklet and put it on my right ankle. The purple gem and blue balloon necklaces turned into bracelets that I put the purple gem on my left wrist, and the blue ballon on my left wrist. I turned the red lightning bolt necklace into a belt that had red lightning bolts merging into the gem. And as for the tiara I turned it into a crown that completely circled my head, and the star lowered to be only a centimeter above my head. "alright Discord bring it" I ran off to the center of the town.

---------Twilight's (POV)---------

"You wont get away with this Discord" I yelled

"Silly little foal yes I will, in fact I already have, Keith is on his way right now bringing me the elements to save you, and theres nothing you can do to stop me" Discord said with cockiness, and jostling the cage that now held the mane 6

"Keith will stop you!"

"HA fat chance, now if you excuse me there is some... AH never mind theres Keith right on time" Discord said as he looked at Keith running to him

--------Keith's (POV)--------

"DIIISSSCOOOORRRRD!!!" I shouted as I ran faster and faster, what surprised me though is that the red lightning bolt light up, then as though it was speaking to me, I shouted again "LOYALTY!" as I said the elements name I was surrounded by a(n) red electrical aura. Then as though I had to I ran straight into Discord

To his surprise he was unsuspecting of the use of the element, and stood there wide eyed like an idiot as I hit him with the lightning charge he went flying into the cage.

--------Third person view--------

Discord stood up and shook his head then spoke "You'll pay for that boy" then he summoned a two handed war axe with the blade being serrated and the other end consisting of a sharp long point meant for stabbing from the side

"The only one who is gonna pay is you Discord for hurting my friends" he spawned 2 weapons onto his back, a serenity sword (a sword that has a bladed side and the other side is serrated from top to bottom) and a semi-automatic spas-12 shotgun with a blade fixed onto the barrel, and instead of shells he modified it to use slug rounds instead. Then he reached over his shoulders and pulled out my sword and gun "Bring it" Keith shouted and pointed his sword at Discord.

"Insolent whelp!" Discord shouted, lunging at Keith with a overhead swing

Keith brought both his weapons in front of him in a form of an X to block the strike the blow landed hard and forced Keith to one knee keeping the blow from mere inches away

Keith used the momentum of the blow to barely move it to the side in which he pulled the trigger to the shotgun, and use the recoil to send him backwards, he then pointed the gun behind him, and firing again, Keith came flying towards Discord it a horizontal strike

Before Discord knew what hit him he had a nice clean cut right across his chest "AH YOU'LL PAY FOR THAT!" Discord shouted and brought his axe in a upward diagonal arch

With the split second Keith had he decided to parry the axe with his gun only to have it flung away to who knows where "Hey I Was Using That" Keith said in annoyance. The crown atop his head glowed purple he then shouted "MAGIC" then he fired a huge fireball pointblank at Discord's chest

Discord was launched backwards, and his axe no where to be seen, much to his delight as Keith didn't see him throw it "Well Edit It's been fun but this is the end" Discord outstretched his lions paw, and thrusted it backward as though he pulled something

The blue ballon glowed brighter with every second Keith then shouted with a smile "LAUGHTER" he then backflipped over the axe as it sailed right below him towards Discord, and stuck the landing he said "Twitchy Twitch" then placed the sword on his back

Discord only stared in shock as the blade of his own axe had lobbed off his paw "AHHHH! HOW COME I CANT KILL YOU!" Discord shouted holding the wound in agony

The orange apple then lit up Keith shouted "HONESTY" and his eyes turned a ethereal white. The single word struck Discord making him fall to the ground and revealing his true self, It was him only when he saw him he had a strange massive dark spirit covering his red chaotic spirit.

Discord stood up, and with all the dark powers he had, he put all of it into his remaining hand and launched it towards the girls

The purple gem then shined bright Keith teleported to the cage taking the dark magic full force engulfing him

"HA HA HA HA HA HAAA what a foal you are Keith thinking you could beat me" Discord mocked Keith

"GENEROSITY" Keith shouted from inside the beam, he then crosses his arms and knelt down absorbing and withholding the last of the magic "You know Discord you should be more generous with your magic, just think of the good it could be used for. LIKE DEFEATING YOU!" as Keith finished and held out his left hand and closed it then he focused all of Discord's magic into his hand, and opened releasing all of the dark magic back at him

"AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH" Discord yells in agony, then he fell over writhing in pain and falling to the ground

---------Keith's (POV)---------

I stood up proud of my victory and walked over to the cage which held 6 aww struck mares

"Keith y-you just used the e-elements an-and defeated D-Discord" Twilight stuttered

I opened the cage "No one hurts my friends it's as simple as that" I was the tackled to the ground and given a group hug by the girls

"Keith were so glad your okay" Pinkie pie said hugging me the hardest

"PINKIE...AIR...BREATH....NEED"

"he he sorry Keith" Pinkie giggled

"That was so cool how you beat Discord, you were all watcha then whoosh then pew pew pew then Discord was defeated" Rainbow Dash said with glee

"HUH OH MY GOSH DISCORD IS HE ALRIGHT?" Fluttershy booked it over to Discord who was still on the ground "Discord are you okay"

"Fluttershy relax I'm sure he's fine" I said "well then again I did cut him and chop off his arm, and incinerate him, and fry hi with his own magic... Okay maybe he is not so okay as I thought" I started walking towards Discord with the 5 other girls following behind me

What I didn't expect though was Discord pushing Fluttershy to the ground, putting his foot on her so she couldn't get up, and pointing my lost shotgun at her head "Take one more step boy and she dies HA HA HA HA YOU LOSE!"

I reached over and grabbed my sword and infused it with minor electricity and held it pointing straight at Discord "Yeah not quite Discord"

"How do you plan on doing anything with that sword when i'm all the ay over here far out of your reach."

"Keith please help me" Fluttershy whimpered.

"Quiet you!" Discord shouted at Fluttershy and raising the blade of the gun to her throat.

Before it could continue I threw my sword up into the air as I turned around doing a backflipped, and kicking the sword at Discord, the sword grazed him as planed but the electricity paralyzed him making him drop the gun to the floor next to Fluttershy's head 'way to close for comfort.' We all ran over to Fluttershy.

"OH MY GOSH FLUTTERSHY ARE YOU OKAY" Rainbow Dash yelled hugging her best friend.

"Yes Rainbow I'm fine, but what about Discord?" Fluttershy asked.

"Oh yeah, Hey Twilight when I saw Discord's spirit I noticed it was being overshadowed by a dark black spirit and it just seemed wrong" I said.

The pink butterfly slowly started to light up.

"Well thats odd are you saying that Discord is being possessed by something?" Twilight asked.

"Well thats just it I dont know" I said as I felt a strange... something happening at the back of my head.

The butterfly shone brighter.

"Well last time we saw him he did have a blueish unicorn horn, not a black one" Twilight said pointing at his horn.

The butterfly gem fully lit up.

I stared at the the glowing gem then I knew what it meant. I walked over to Discord's defeated figure and kneeled before him and unlike the other elements I whispered "KINDNESS" I placed both hands above him as they lit up.

Discord finally opened his eyes only to see me with the kindest smile he has ever seen.

I slammed my hands down on his chest and pulled, but instead of picking up Discord himself I slowly pulled out a large midnight black cloud with two blue slit eyes staring at me.

The cloud shot straight at me completely covering me in darkness.

I felt whatever this thing is seeping into my body I tried fighting it but it slowly over took me 'no I wont go like this'

All the elements shined bright the feeling was overwhelming as I shouted "HARMONY" an explosion of light came from my body and purged the darkness from my body and all around me. I fell to the ground, my ears ringing, I was unable to see properly... I fell unconsious.

The Start of the day…

"Uuuuuggh what happened" I groaned waking up "Where am I" I looked around what looked to be a hospital room. Then my luck then decided to hate me as my hearing returned *BEEP BEEP BEEP* "OH GOD DAMNIT" I groaned loudly then sat there staring at it in one of those hospital cloths they give you ".................................... I'm going to destroy you now" I said to the machine

----------Rarity's (POV)----------

"All i'm saying Apple Jack is that you should let me make you a new hat or at least refurbish your current one" I said staring at Apple Jack's worn hat

"Naw thanks Rares I like mah hat just the way it is" AJ said to me with minor annoyance

"Oh fine but this isn't-" my sentence was cut short because of a loud booming sound that came from down the hall near Keith's room. Regardless of the nurses wishes the girls and I ran down to Keith's room. When we got there made all of us laugh wildly. There standing over an heart monitor was Keith strangling the charred remains of the still beeping monitor.

"STOP BEEPING!" Keith shouted at the machine

----------Keith's (POV)-----------

I looked over from the rage inducing machine to see the girls laughing at me, 'meh whatever I dont mind being a joke every now and then' "Hey girls whats up" I asked in a peppy tone. "So when can I get out of this god forsaken place"

"The doctor cleared you for leave after he cut you open and looked inside you to see if anything was wrong with you" RD said

"THE DOCTOR DID WHAT!!!" I screamed

"Relax relax the doc didn't cut you open, although we did have to strip you of your close"

"Wait who's this "we" you speak of" I asked with confusion

"Me, Twilight, Rarity, Fluttershy, Aj, and Pinkie Pie. Oh and lets just say we were all impressed"

"Impressed with what"

"Well lets just say that yours isn't covered like a stallions" RD said in a lustful tone, and with a wink

My eyes grew wide and pupils dilated to pinpricks "I-I-I umm uh, you mean you all saw?" I asked in fear as I looked around at five blushing mares and one cyan mare advancing towards me "Umm Rainbow Dash what are you doing?" I asked in worry

"Mmmm how about me and you go somewhere a bit more private" she said rubbing a hoof on my chest, pushing me in the corner, and getting really close to my face

"BACK OFF TRAMP, HE'S MINE" Rarity shouted, pulling a rope out of Aj's hat, lassoing, and pulling RD towards her

I watched with shock as the two got into a classic fight were a white cloud formed around them, as they rolled on the floor "Okay... DOES ANYONE WANT TO EXPLAIN WHATS HAPPENING!" I asked freaking out

"Oh that pretty simple, Rarity, and Rainbow Dash went into heat a few days ago" Twilight spoke up

Wait how long was I out?"

"Umm about a month"

"What!"

"Oh yes Rarity also refused to leave your side the entire time you were here, only when she started her heat did she leave, and lock herself in her house, only to come out and check on you every now and then" Pinkie Pie bounced into our little talk

"Hey speakin of Rares ain't we outta pull them two apart" Aj hinted to us, and pointing to Rarity who had RD tied up in a very "diffrent" position

"Hey Twilight can you knock them out?" I asked

"Wwwwwaayyy ahead of you" She said blasting the two and K.O'ing them instantly

"I'll take Rainbow Dash home" Fluttershy finally spoke

"And I'll take Rarity home" I said

"Okay, put on your clothes, and good luck" Twilight said

I held up my hand, forming a ball of shadows, and throwing it on the ground in front of me engulfing me in darkness

"Keith!" Twilight yelled in panic, using a light spell on me

The flames went away leaving me in new clothes which consisted of black running shoes, black pants, a black shirt, and a nick pair of black matte casing, sunspot sunglasses. That was my appearance until I was blasted in the chest by a fucking ray of light. "What The Hell Twilight That Fucking Hurt!" I yelled in pain

"KEITH YOUR OKAY, what was that thing just now?" Twilight asked calming down

"That Twilight, is what I call elemental clothing when I take a Specific element and make clothing out of it, although the type of element I use makes me immune to said element, but dangerously weak to it's counter part, oh by the way, THAT FUCKING HURT, now I have to go get a different set since you fried these" I said gesturing to the burnt skin and clothes.

"Sorry Keith I didn't know, well you better get Rare... SINCE WHEN DID YOU HAVE WINGS!" she yelled staring at my wings after I had taken off my shirt

"Huh? Oh yeah I completely forgot about those, You see about 17 years or so when I was around 3 I think... I dunno, but the assholes that kept me locked up wanted to test with my DNA and cell structure,but didn't realize before it was to late that you dont keep chords next to a young me, i'm bound to mess with stuff, so one thing lead to another, a explosion went of, and I got these"

"How come we didn't see them when we stri... *cough cough* took off your clothes"

"Thats because every time I change my clothes like what I just did, for some odd reason it resets a edit I've done to myself, but I completely forgot I made these bad boys Invisible" I finished as I Tried to move them, but found them extremely stiff "I dont think not moving them in 2 years was a good idea though *groan*" I finally got the appendages to move although slowly at first. Rolling the joint that was used to connect my bones with the wings, and giving each of them a satisfying pop. "Oh yeah, much better" I said with bliss.

"Well you better get Rares home Keith, no more delayin, ya hear" Aj said nudging me and a passed out unicorn in my arms

"Well I guess i'm gonna have to settle with normal pants for now" I said snapping my fingers, and poof'd up pants, that I put on. Then I walked out of the hospital, and dropped of Rarity at her home. Soon after, I decided to walk around town, to see whats going down. "Oh yeah I am In for one interesting day" I said walking away from Rarity's, and leaving my shirt of to show off my bionic wings. They look like normal pegasus wings, except a lot bigger, and about twice my one and a half times my size so about seven foot ten inches. They also shoot electricity... yet for what ever reason it leaves me really weak, and I only use it under extreme circumstances. Also there really fragile and... oooohhhhhh that why I made them invisible so no one would try to break them. "Well audience It's time I take my leave, time for a new day" I said as I flew away

…The Middle of the Day…

I was flying along when a rainbow blur tackled me out of the sky

"I WANT YOU" Rainbow Dash shouted trying to pin me to a cloud

We hit the cloud only to my surprise we didn't fall through "First off what the fuck is happening, and secondly Didn't Twilight Knock You Out!"

"Oh she did but I want some ass and nothing is going to stop me"

"Well how about I fix that" I grabbed RD. Then pulling her in for a hug, I squeezed really hard resulting in a pink flash, throwing me off the cloud and a K.O'ed RD on it. I looked at my hand which now held a pink orb with RD's cutie mark on it "Well I assume this is RD's heat sooooo I'll save this for later" I said as I put it in my back pocket. "Well now what do I do, okay lets check my options there is Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, and Applejack, oh and then there is Discord, that I have yet to actually talk to, oh and then there is the castle... hmmm so many options"

I was lost in my rant until I saw a pink blur speed through the town "well... Pinkie Pie it is" I took of after her

When I got near her I noticed that she was placing a hat in a tree "Hey Pinks Whats up?" I asked

"You silly" she said poking my nose

"umm that's not what I mean"

"Then what do you mean"

"What are you doing" I asked slightly annoyed

"Ooooooh why didn't you ask"

"I did" I mumbled

"Well I am currently refilling my secret hat supplies with gummy, so dont tell anyone, okay"

"okay"

"Pinkie promise?"

"Umm... what?

She then proceeded to take me through a Pinkie promise "Now remember Keith no on and I mean no one break a Pinkie promise" Her mane deflated a little

"Ooooookaaay... so who is gummy

"Gummy is my pet alligator"

"Where is he, or she"

"He is currently on your shoulder"

I looked over at my shoulder only to flip out as I saw a baby alligator about to bite down on it, I brace myself for the pain, only for it to never come. I took another look at the alligator only to realize it had no teeth "okay thats enough of that" I said removing the alligator from my shoulder and placing him inside Pinkie's mane "Also where did you get a pet in this town, i dont think i've seen a pet store

"Go to Fluttershy, if you want a pet then she's your mare"

"Alright Pinkie, thank you, and I wont break that promise either" I said taking off in the direction of Fluttershy's hou... "umm which way is Fluttershy's?"

She point to the left "Oh and nice wings"

"Thanks, bye" I shot of like a bullet to flutter's 'oh yeah now i'm feelin deez wings' "WWWWOOOOOO HOOOOOOO"

I was quickly approaching a cottage with a yellow and pink pegasus mare standing in front of it watching the animals run about. Thinking ahead I slowed my approach to not scare her "Hey Fluttershy, hows it going" I asked in a chipper mood

"Oh hello Keith everything is fine, what are doing here?"

"Well I was looking for a pet, or pet's"

She immediately went from shy to professional "Alright Keith lets go find you a pet"

She took me to the back of her hut "Alright flutters what ya got for me?"

"Well normally i'd let the pet decide it owner, but lets wing it, as rainbow would say"

I noticed that her eyes kept darting from left to right "Umm is everything alright Fluttershy?"

"Yes everything is fine, hmm how about a snake"

"No thank you I've had a number of bad encounters with snakes"

"Oh my I hope your alright, how about a raccoon?"

"Well even though a raccoon is natures ninja, I'll have to pass. Don't you have something I don't know a little bit more like me?"

"Umm well there is one… or I should say two"

"Well lets see them then"

"Hang on Keith let me explain, the first is as cold as the arctic but she lets those she finds worthy to command her, and she aid you any way she can, yet she does not enjoy hate but seeks friendship ,the second one has a fiery passion to do as he pleases, but he will always fly by your side but will not go anywhere without the first" Fluttershy said warningly.

"You got me hooked, lets see them" I said practicly drooling because of how awesome Flutters made them sound.

"Okay…" She breathed in a lot of air, and released one of the loudest whistles I have ever heard towards the forest behind her, it practically blew out me eardrums.

I heard rumbling despite my hearing, and felt the ground shake. I snapped my head to the forest, only to see a spinning cone shape thing made of fucking fire and ice headed straight for us "Whelp … I'm fucked" I said with hysteria, knowing nothing I could do, could be as epic as this … EVER.

"Alright Keith don't freak out, but meet Mr. Phoenix, and … Ms. Windigo, There best friends" as Fluttershy finished the cone stopped infront of us revealing the two pets

My mind was blow so all I could do was stare at the Phoenix and green Windigo wait … green? "Umm if my mythology is correct aren't windigos blue?"

Fluttershy simply replied "Twilight made it so she would feed off of friendship instead of hate, by the way Keith they if they agree to go with you they will be bonded to you"

"What does that mean?"

"Well it means that you'll be able to understand them, but these two are special so you'll also feel there pain"

"Okay so how would you two like to come with me?"

The girl trotted around me, observing me. After 10 minutes of this she had decided …………………………… and nodded her head because of the strong bonds I have with everyone. Which in turn made the Phoenix land on her back and nod too.

"Well it seem they have decided, now you have to name them" Fluttershy said getting excited

I looked at the guy first "How about Flare?"

He shook his head

"Blaze?"

He shook his head

"Match?"

He sat there perched on the Windigos back, and finnaly he nodded.

"Okay, Match it is, now for you" I said turning to the green Windigo "Lets get the clichés out of the way, Frost?"

Without hesitation nodded her head rapidly.

"That was originally your name huh?"

She nodded once

"Okay, Match, Freeze, now what?"

They looked at each other and nodded. They both jumped on me and pinned me down, before I knew what had happened I was on my stomach with my shirt torn off exposing my wings. Few seconds later I swear to whatever god there is here that I died because next thing I knew my wings were torn from their sockets, and I was laying in a pool of my own blood, with my old wings in front of me. I blacked out

-----------Empty void-----------

I woke cringing and yelling in pain, only to find my new pets holding me down

"Master please calm down" The voice stunned me "We are almost done, Now Match"

"Right"

Another flash went off, and they were gone. Yet the pain was no more, I looked around and stood up feeling only a huge amount of stiffness in my back. I looked to my sides, only to find my wings were gone but replaced with two different different wings. on my left was a wing that went from red, the start of the wing and went to purple at the end of it. On my right was a wing that started from sky blue, and went to green at the end of the wing.

The empty white void turned black in the blink of an eye, and a white fog surrounded me "Hello?, What Are You!?" I screamed staring at the fog that took a semblance to a pony.

"I am the one who will explain this bond to you Keith, you see, you did not obtain Match, and Frost by luck, it was me who gave them to you, and me controlling that sweet mare you call Fluttershy"

"That doesn't answer my question, who are you and why are you controlling Fluttershy" I said spawning a Katana, but dropped it when it burst into flames and then freezing over the fire "Whats going on!?"

"In time you will come to know but for now I must warn you, you will face a number of tests, of how many, I am not sure, but in the end you must do what is right, you have already beaten Discord, and past the first test by vanquishing the nightmare from his soul"

"Well that explains what that was, but who are you and what are these tests"

"Just call me Boss, but as a consequence for improperly using your power, I am taking them away"

"Yeah and how do you plan on that"

"Like this" the fog hit me hard and covered me

It felt like something of mine was being suppressed, but I couldn't put my finger on it

"I have taken your powers but leave you with a gift" the fog held a dark blue smoke at bay "you will get your powers back in time but for now this is what you have. You have the power of Ice, to freeze your enemies with the help of Frost" Frost trotted up next to me "And the power of fire to light your foes ablaze with the help of Match" Match came up and landed on my shoulder "with help of them you will over come your greatest test, and with that said, good luck"

"Wait you asshole get back here, I'm not done talking to you!" it was to late, Boss and my powers were gone 'although on the bright side I did get two whole new powers' I thought trying to look on the bright side

"Alright master lets go home" Match spoke

"HOLY SHIT YOU CAN…" A white flash went off blinding me 'I am really getting tired of the flashes.'

…The End of the Day

I awoke pulling my face out of a red watery metallic substance, and breathing in heavy "uuck what is this stuff… oh it's blood, probably mine considering the situation in fact lets review the thing." I looked at my old wings that were laying in my blood puddle, too my torn of shirt, too five mares coming towards me, too a passed out Fluttershy twitching on the ground, too my blood covered body, back to Fluttershy, back to the mares running at me "Well all in all this looks bad no matter which way you look at it, so lets go collect those bloody feathers of mine before i'm accused" I walked over to my severed wings and started to pull the feathers off my old wings. 'hmm now where do I put these…meh i guess i'll use my hammer space pockets like I did with RD's lust' I ended the though by placing the roughly 500 feathers in my back pocket

"Keith where is *gasp* what did you do!" Twilight yelled in my face

"Hey, calm down I didn't do anything, all I remember is being pinned down by Frost and Match, my new pets, a Windigo and a Phoenix and having my wings ripped off and being replace with these" I spread my new wings

Everyone, including a now conscious Fluttershy sat there in aww with there pupils dilating outwards covering most of there eyes, except rarity who was drooling out the mouth

"Keith darling, you look amazing, can I have a few of your feathers?" Rarity asked batting her eyes at me.

"Sure" I plucked a few for her and gave them to her

"Okay okay so what exactly happened while you and Flutters were here alone?" Applejack asked much to Rarity's annoyance

I sat everyone down and told them everything from after I left Pinkie Pie to when I woke up. "And thats what happened up to this point"

"So Fluttershy was possessed, you had your powers taken away for misuse, you were warned of future challenges, you got 2 pets only to have them rip off your wings, and you got supposed new powers… that is totally awesome" Rainbow Dash Said

"Yeah that pretty much sums it up except for the awesome part most of the time I was in pain most of the time"

"Well what now?" Twilight asked me

"Well I plan to go to the castle with a new name since I no longer have the power of complete and utter bullshit, and get some training in with my new power"

"How long will it be before I…I mean since WE see you again?" Rarity stuttered out

"I dont know but you can be sure I'll write and visit if possible, okay Rarity" I said reassuring her catching her mistake

"Well goodbye Keith, we'll see you soon" Rarity lowered her head and tearing up, but hiding it behind her mane

"Umm girls can you excuse us for a moment" I said. They all walked inside Fluttershy's house "Rarity?"

"Just go *sniffle* just" at that point she broke down into tears

I caught her and held her close "Hey it's okay Rarity i'll be back, especially if your still here" I smiled at her

"Keith there is something I want to tell you I…I…I" I cut her off

"Shh, It's ok Rarity I know, and the truth is" I leaned down, lifted her head to meet my gaze, and ever so lightly I leaned in, and kissed her.

Her now red eyes widen in shock. Then they softened, and gave a smile "Go, promise to come visit?" She moved away to let me get up

"It's a Pinkie promise" I said with a smile, and a small tear came from my eye. With that I spread my new wings and took off.

------------The air------------

"Well with these new powers i'm gonna have to think of a better name for myself, something much better than that damn computer gave me, I mean really, who names a kid "Edit" that a fucking verb. Hmm I have a first name "Keith" but now I need a last name. Meh I'm sure it'll come to me in time, but in the mean time…" I halted my flight "What happen to Frost and Match?" I asked to no one. I felt a pain rocket through my body, the pain was so bad my wings stopped flapping, and I fell to a sheet of clouds below. I was excepting to fall through the clouds, not actually land on them but hey I'll take this over the ground any day. I stood up only to fall back down on my knees as the pain returned, but this time it was focused on my chest.

I looked down at my chest only to see a red and sky blue smoke leave my body. The two mists separated from each other and started to spin like a mini tornado, and just when I thought things couldn't get worse, the red tornado burst into flames,, and the Blue tornado froze over and shattered leaving ice shards circling it. Just then the tornados exploded knocking me on my back, a few feet from where I crash landed. I looked back over to see a phoenix, and a green windigo staring at me from where the tornados exploded "Hi master, you called?" Frost asked me

"Umm… since when can you talk?" I asked utterly confused, and wanting answers

"Since we bonded, we have only been able to talk to you" Frost said in a more little girl voice

"Okay I have some questions for the both of you" I said

"We will do our best to answer you Sir" Match spoke

"Why did you rip of my wings and replace them with these new, and I'll admit, more badass wings?"

"Well we each needed a piece to bond to so we decided your wings to be the best choice, Sir"

"Okay first off that hurt like hell, and second of all what exactly happened to me when we bonded?"

"I'll answer that, Master. When we bonded It took away your old powers of creation, and alter, and gave you power over ice and fire plus some other stuff" Frost answered me

"What does this other stuff include?"

"Well Sir for me you Fire based magic, a flaming dual bladed one handed sword , and you also get thermal vision. Your magic supply is limited but does regenerate over time, and you also have the ability to summon me any time you please, Sir" Match stated with confidence

"Okay what about you, Frost?"

"With me you get Ice based magic, and regeneration magic. You also get ten ice needles each needle is a foot long that circles you and is bound to do your bidding, also an addition to your weapon it freezes anything you want it to. You also gain pinpoint accuracy, and as for magic source I share it with Match" Frost said happily

"HOLY SHIT THOSE WEAPONS SOUND BADASS! How do I summon them?"

"Well for me you hold out one of your hands and you focus on the essence of fire inside you" Flare spoke up

I held out my right hand, and focused. After five minutes of standing there my arm started to burn, and a word came to my head and I shouted it "IGNITE" the palm of my hand burst into flames and my eyes turned into vertical slits, much like the ones I saw when I pulled the evil spirt out of Discord. A rune of fire appeared on the cloud where I was standing on. Then the flame in my hand started to expand, and slowly revealed my new sword. The hilt was red, that had an eight sided ruby that was wrapped in a magical fire that could not be put out. The grip was made of purple leather, the hand guard on it is an exact copy of Match's wings only made of a metal even I did not know, and the blade was thirty-one inches, inscribed with a strange rune on both side up and down the center of the blade, and the blade itself was is on fire, also this could not be put out. I stared at it in aww, and giving it a few experimental swings hearing the whoosh, as if you where to swing a stick on fire around. "Okay this is awesome Match, Match?" I looked around only to see Frost sitting on her haunches "Frost wheres Match?"

"I am bonded to you Sir" Match said

"Holy shit where are you!?" I asked having the shit scared outta me… again

"In order for you to use my abilities I must be bonded with you"

"So where are you"

"In your mind Sir"

"So technically since I have a voice in my head does that make me mental?"

"…………………………yes"

"Lovely, now get out of my head"

"As you wish Sir"

The same red mist exited through my chest again only this time it didn't hurt, but as the last of the mist left me the sword itself turned into the same mist and joined with the rest only to form Match standing there.

"Alright Frost how do I summon yours?"

"Close your eyes, and focus on the essence of ice, and the cold all around you" Frost said in a serious tone

I stood there focusing on the chillness of the night. After a few minutes of standing there, the hairs on my neck stood up, and a word came to my, then I shouted it "FLASH-FREEZE" My arms shot outward with Ice covering my hands, then if by instinct I slammed my hands together, and widened my stance. I place my left foot in front of me and kneeled down placing all ten fingers on the cloud instantly turning it to ice. I snapped my arms to there full length in front of me, and fingers pointed outwards covered in a eerie blue mist, while my eyes stayed in a circle this time, but turned ice blue. Suddenly ten needles made of ice, each a foot long. I flicked my wrist to bring a needle near me to observe closely.

It was a needle exactly a foot long that has the same eerie glow to it as my fingers did. The color of the needles are sky blue indicating it's ability to freeze, and with another flick of the wrist the needle turned green representing it's healing nature. What intrigued me the most is the rune symbols going in a spiral fashion from tip to tip.

"I wonder what the runes on Ignite, and Flash-Freeze mean" I mumbled to myself

"In time you will know, Master" Frost echoed in my head

"*sigh* Lets go Match"

"On it, Sir" Match said happily finally being given an order. He turned into a red mist and was absorbed into my body

"So any idea how disengage my powers?" I asked staring at the needles floating at my side

"Use the code word" Frost stated

"Great theres a code word, what is it defuse, and defrost" I said sarcastically only for the needles to shatter and turn into mist then my body absorbed "Well for once being sarcastic payed off"

"One more question"

"Shoot Sir" Match spoke prepared

"How old are you two?" I asked taking off towards the castle

For once both were hesitant to answer "Well don't be shocked Master but I'm 10 and so is Match, we were born at the exact same time, we were both abandoned by our parent who left us in the Everfree forest to die, but with the help of each other we managed long enough"

"But how are you still alive Frost because last I check Ponyville is the nicest place in all of Equestria?"

"As soon as I set foot in the town I fell and couldn't get up Match here helped me to a cottage where two ponies you know by Fluttershy, and Twilight awaited me. Twilight cast a permanent reversal spell on me making it so I could feed off of friendship instead of hate, and to mark me to know that I am a friendly Windigo they turned me green"

I could have sworn I herd a sniffle "I'm sorry Frost, it's a touchy subject, I shouldn't have asked"

"It's okay Master" Frost said in a rather shaken voice

The rest of the flight was flown in silence

--------The palace front doors----------

I decided to take the less subtle approach and land hard in front of the guards that were decked out in night blue armor dark grey coats, and yellow slitted eyes. As soon as I landed both guards snapped to attention and pointed the spears at me followed by more guards coming around the corner.

"Halt, state who you are, and why you are here" a lesser guard approached me but obviously the leader here

I counted the how many guards there where, 11 guards in total… 'perfect' "Hey Frost think I can take them"

"Defiantly" Frost said with confidence

"Final chance state who you are or face the punishment" the guard stated

I closed my eyes "FLASH-FREEZE" the eerie glow returned around my fingers as ten ice needles formed around me

"ALL UNITS ATTACK" the guard shouted

"Time to test these babies out" I stated cracking my knuckles

-------3rd person-------

Two guards leaped at Keith, Keith raised two fingers on each side, and thrusting them forward launching two needles each into the two guards knocking them out instantly. Keith brought the needles back to him "Who's next" Keith shouted to the remaining nine guards

Keith raised both hands launching eight needles outward downing all the guards but one unicorn mare who was shivering at the cold aura

"DEFROST" all the cold went away at Keith's words "Hey guard you know it's polite to tell your name first to your guests"

The guard looked at him in fear

"Your name, whats your name" Keith asked going slower for the scared mare

"P-Precise Shot, Private Precise Shot who are you"

"I am Keith, just Keith for now"

"What are you?"

"I am a human? yeah human"

"What do you want?"

"I want an escort to see Luna, and you my girl, are perfect"

"I-I am" she asked with a blush

"Yeah you are also take off that annoying armor I like to talk to people, not a mask" Keith said not picking up the hint

"Umm o-okay" Precise took off her armor and her coat went from dark grey to dark green, and her mane went from a fin to a mane that is grass green. Her cutie mark is a golden circle with four even lines spread apart evenly to point outa red dot in the middle of it.

"Well Precise Shot, please lead the way"

-------Keith's POV--------

"So Precise Shot what exactly do you do in the military?"

"Huh Oh Im an archer, one of the best I might add" Precise said with confidence in a voice that is really close to twilights just a bit higher though

"Cool, you might have to show me one day, how long ago did you join the military?"

"Umm, about a month ago"

"Hows the military life treating you?" I asked with with a bit of humor

"*chuckle* My back aches, my hooves hurt, and I get little sleep because I get night shifts, so relatively good, oh and you can just call me Ranger" Ranger said returning the gesture

"Well I always say that the military is a bunch of stiffs" I said in a mocking tone

Ranger laughed "That is so true well were here, I'll be seeing you later Keith" she finished looking down

"Hey none of that sad stuff" I grabbed her and flung her over my shoulder

"HEY PUT ME DOWN!" she yelled

I walked into the throne room only to see Luna sleeping away on the job, I put Ranger down "So… should we wake her up?"

"Are you kidding she'll have our heads" Ranger yelled/whispered at me

"To late" I ran up to Luna, thus making Ranger do the same, and I pulled Luna's hoof from under her head, and watched it fall to the floor making Luna's entire body tumble onto her back, and successfully waking her up.

"Huh oh hello Keith and … who are you?" Luna asked the green pony

"I am Private Precise Shot" Ranger saluted

"AHH it's you Ranger" Luna said with a knowing smirk

"Y-You know me?" Ranger asked becoming scared

"But of course I know you, you see when I was asleep I was simply roaming and came across you leading Keith here, but why you are not in your armor, and the ten incapacitated guards in the front of the palace i'm sure involve Keith in some way"

"Right again Luna" I said

"So Keith may I ask you why you came here with one of my guards?"

"Well I would like to stay here for a while, and train my new abilities" I then told her everything that has happened to me over the past week, while Ranger and Luna sat there like Fillies listening to a story

"Oh my that is interesting, well I have you know that I am honored for you to be here, I will assign you a guest room, and a guard"

"Thank you Luna, so who is gonna be my guard?"

"Well since you've already made friends with Private Ranger over here, I'll assign her to you, and of course Private you'll be needing your crossbows" Luna levitated two gauntlets over to Ranger, they were slightly bigger on one side and each gauntlet held three magic arrows each.

"Yes ma'am" Ranger said as she put on her weapons on her front legs, they were high enough to able her hoofs free motion, but low enough to pivot her legs.

"Well Keith goodnight"

"Goodnight Luna, C'mon Ranger I want to find my room and go to bed"

"Oh one more thing Keith you and Ranger will be sharing the room, and your room is the last remaining royal suit" Luna called out

"Okay, thank you"

Ranger led me to our room, in which we both proceeded to flop on our beds and pass out

END of "Keith" series part 1