How I Dated Your Cousin

by RainbowJack2000

Rating: mature
Tags: Alternate Universe, Human, Romance
Length: 1755

Braeburn has had a crush on Applejack since the day they met. So when they go out together, it becomes much more than a simple crush.

What happens when you have a crush on your favorite cousin?
Apparently, a lot.
Braeburn has always wanted to fall in love with someone. He's always considered dating a guy, too, considering he was gay. Once.
So, he dates a girl instead. But when he asks Applejack for advise, he soon realizes that love is closer than he thought.

I didn't add the tag "slice of life" cause, who the hell fucks their own cousin?
Whoops, bad language!

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2014-01-05 00:20:01 UTC

Chapter 1

Braeburn sighed as he closed his bedroom door and plopping himself in his bed. It was another failed date with a guy he thought he was in love with. He's been going out with so many guys lately, but nine of them seem to be interested. And all this one seemed to be interested in was pie. Stupid Soarin the Wonderbolt. Braeburn sighed again and looked at the picture of Little Strongheart, almost wanting to burst in tears. It's been 2 years since she asked him out. But since his "barn door didn't swing that way," it left her devastated and they haven't spoken ever since.

Maybe he made the biggest mistake of his life. Maybe he wasn't really in love with guys after all. Big McIntosh was really the closest he has had in a relationship. Which was weird, considering they were both related, but nonetheless, they were both gay. But Braeburn wasn't sure about that anymore. It seemed lately that when he ran into handsome guys, there was no instant heartbeat or anything. But girls was a different story; stammering, sweating, and of course, the instant heartbeat.

Maybe...maybe, Ah've changed? Can it be? Ah ain't gay anymore? He thought, taking off his shoes and going under his comfy blanket.

Maybe he can ask Applejack for advise. She's dated before, and she knows about gay people more than anyone else. Heck, her brother and one of her friends are. Braeburn smiled. He had a big day to plan ahead.

He needed to visit his family.

"How long will you be gone, Brae?" Asked his curious younger sister, Golden Delicious.

"Not too long, Ah hope. Sis, can ya take care of the house fer me? Ah ain't sure how long it'll take me over there, unless something bad happens."

"Didn't ya just say it wouldn't take long?" His other sister, Red Delicious asked, coming out the house with coffee. Braeburn rolled his eyes.

"Nevermind what Ah just said. Look, just take care of it." Braeburn commanded.

"Aye, aye, cap'n." Golden Delicious saluted, causing Braeburn to roll his eyes again, along with his sister's.

"Aren't you a little ol' fer that?"

"Eenope."

Laughing, he pulled his twin sisters into a hug and they embraced. Pulling apart, Braeburn grabbed his suitcase and waved, walking to the train station. However, when he was not paying attention, he accidentally bumped into someone.

"So sorry, miss...Strongheart?"

The young Indian looked at cowboy before her and stared at him. The look in her eyes looked like regret and sadness.

"Oh, hello Braeburn? Um...how's the apple orchard business?"

Braeburn could only stare at the girl who talked to him. After just a few years, she finally talks to him. He just wanted to scream in joy and crush the girl in a suffocating hug. However, he just kept his cool and answered her.

"Uh...it's dandy, Ah guess. How's the Natives club?"

"Good."

The two awkwardly looked down at the ground until Braeburn hears a train whistle from a distance. He picks up his suitcases, causing Strongheart to look at him.

"Ah...better get goin'. Gonna go see Applejack and the gang. Y'all remember her, right?"

Immediately, Little Strongheart's face lit up, "Yeah. Send her and the girls a hello for me, will ya?"

Braeburn smiled a little and nodded. After another of silence, Strongheart waved goodbye and started down the desert road. Braeburn shook his head, and ran down the street, towards the train station.

After a quick snack on the train, Braeburn slowly drifted off into a deep sleep. However, the dream seemed more to be a terrifying flashback.

Dash-back time

Braeburn was whistling while he worked in the orchard, plucking the ripe, red apples right off the trees. He wasn't as built as his cousin, Big. Mac, but he wasn't bad looking either. And that's what Little Strongheart liked about him. He had visible muscles and a six-pack, which was clearly hard not to miss, considering he only had his vest on. Reassuring herself that she could do this, she walked towards him.

"Hey, Braeburn. Could I talk to you for a second?"

Braeburn turns toward the voice and smiled. "Howdy, Lil' Strong! Whatcha want to talk about?"

He walked over so that they could speak face-to-face. She practically had to look up at him and tried hard not to blush.

"Well, er...how do I put this? I...k-kinda...well, there's this thing..."

"Spit it out, Strong. Ah ain't got all day." Braeburn rolled his eyes and smirked.

"Here goes nothing," Little Stongheart whispered to herself, before turning back to the confused cowboy, "Will you go out with me?"

"DEPARTURE TO PONYVILLE! ALL LEAVE THE TRAIN IF YOU'RE GOING TO PONYVILLE!" The conductor announced, causing Braeburn to wake up from his nap. He quickly grabbed his suitcases and jumped off the train, only to be greeted by a pink-haired girl, other girls, a guy, and a noisemaker.

"SURPRISE!!!! Welcome back to Ponyville, Braeburn!" Pinkie Pie exclaimed, blowing into the noisemaker.

"Ah...er..okay?" Braeburn asked, both amused and terrified.

"How's the family?"

"The...family?" What?

Suddenly, a blond country girl pushed the party maniac away and embraced her cousin.

"Howdy, Brae! Long time no see! The last time we spoke in person was a year ago. How's the sisters doin'?" Applejack eagerly asked.

Braeburn took a good look at her. Last time he had seen her, she was at least 3 inches shorter. Now she was tall, strong, and very attractive. His throat tickled. He has never thought of any of his cousins as attractive, well, except for Big Mac,who was casually standing behind everyone. But, why would he think of Applejack as attractive?

"Oh, you know, the sisters are doin' good. Bein' nosy as ever, though."

Applejack chuckled, "Classic girls. Oh, and sorry about the whole 'surprise' fiasco. Pinkie wanted ta go 'all out.' The girls wanted ta say hi."

The rambunctious rainbow-haired tomboy spoke up, "Hey Braeburn! How's Little Strongheart doing?"

Braeburn's eyes widened at the sudden question, but managed to keep his cool, "She's doin'...fine. Yep, that's the word! Fine..."

Everyone stared at him, confused. "O-kaaaaay?"

"Let's get goin', shall we?"

"So, Brae, what brings ya to Ponyville?" Applejack asked, handing Braeburn a milkshake.

The Apples had arrived back home after stopping the rest of the girls off. Outside on the porch, the 2 oldest Apple siblings and their cousin watched the beautiful sunset, giving the sky a beautiful orange and pink glow. After taking a sip of his delicious milkshake, Braeburn turned to his cousin, who was curiously watching him.

"Oh, ya know, just wanted to visit family for a week or so. Unless...ya don't want me here."

Part of what he said was true. He did come to visit family and spend some time with them. But he had really come to ask Applejack for advice. He caught a glimpse of Big Mac, who was watching him as well. Braeburn started to wonder if Big Mac still had feelings for him. As touching as it is, Braeburn felt like he didn't feel the same.

"O' course we want ya here, silly! It's always great to be around family. But what Ah don't understand is why you planned on visitin' us today, when ya thought about it just yesterday. Any reason?" AJ asked, sipping her shake.

Braeburn gulped. Saying the true reason he was there might cause them to laugh, saying how silly he was. And although Applejack hated lies, he was going to make an exception on that.

"Nope, no reason at all."

Before Applejack could question him even further, the youngest Apple sibling, Apple Bloom, came out of the house with a milkshake of her own.

"Sis! Ya said you would help me paint Winona's nails today," the young farmer asked, causing Winona to perk her ears up and look frightened, "Aren't ya comin' back in?"

Applejack chuckled nervously as the boys looked at her in surprise, "Ah was only jokin', but alright. Er, come here Winona!"

At that point, the sheep dog whimpered, shook her head, and ran towards the barn. Applejack sighed and excused herself, running after the dog. Apple Bloom rolled her eyes and went after her. Soon, it was just Big Mac and Braeburn. The Appaloosan cowboy looked at his now-emptied glass, not sure how to make of this awkward situation.

"Sooo...Mac, how are ya doin'?" Braeburn asked, hopefully.

Big Mac shrugged and looked at the girls carrying the dog back to the house, "Been better, Ah suppose."

Braeburn nodded. There was more awkward silence from that moment on. Luckily, Applejack came back with a whimpering dog in her arms.

"Why don't y'all head back inside? It's gettin' mighty dark outside. Brae, ya might be tired, so go hit the hay for the night."

"Cousin Brae, do ya wanna paint Winona's nails with us?" Apple Bloom asked.

Braeburn chuckled, "As fun as it sounds, Ah think Ah'm gonna hit the hay instead."

Apple Bloom pouted, but went inside anyway, followed by Applejack. Big Mac started to get up and head inside as well, followed by Braeburn. Apple Bloom was already heading upstairs to get the nail polish, while Winona was running into Applejack's room, managing to actually shut the door. Chuckling, Braeburn went into the guestroom.

"W-what?" Braeburn stuttered.

"I...asked if you wanted to go out with me." Strongheart repeated.

Braeburn tried to believe his ears, but he couldn't. Strongheart was asking him out. As flattering as it was, he just...it was...oh why did life have to be ironic?!

"Ah...Ah'm sorry, Lil' Strong. But mah...barn door don't swing that way, if ya know what Ah mean."

".......oh." Was all she could say.

"Ah mean, if Ah was-"

"No, Brae, it's...okay. I'll just go now..."

Little Strongheart slowly walked away, feeling disappointed. Braeburn sighed and returned to his work,  confused at why she would ask such a question. Sure he was good-looking and funny and nice, but they've been friends for 5 years now. Surely he told her which gender group he was interested in...right?

Braeburn woke up from his dream, almost gasping for air, and sweating like crazy. Several knocks came from outside his door, until a puny Apple Bloom pushed through the door.

"Cuz, AJ says it's time ta eat. Ya might want ta get outta bed, and...are you okay?"

"Yeah, it's just...hot."

"O-kaaaaay?" And with that, Apple Bloom closed the door.

Braeburn sighed. Tonight, he would ask for advice. And nothing would stop him from doing just that.